IS INNOCENT LOOK, YES?
SEA SMITH SEE MANY BAD THINGS HAPPEN – IT NATURAL BLAME SEA SMITH. BUT IT WRONG! SURE, SEA SMITH STOP BY SHIPS….BY STOP BY, MEAN RAPE. BUT IT NO MEAN EVERY BAD THING ON WATER HE FAULT. SEA SMITH GIVE LINKS AND THEM HAVE EXAMPLE THINGS SEA SMITH NOT DO. HOPE GLIBERTARIAN LAND HOOMANS LIKE:
- THIS ONE EASY – SEA SMITH NOWHERE NEAR SHIP. WHEN SEA SMITH VISIT, YOU GET SOMETHING DIFFERENT THAN NOROVIRUS.
- SAME WITH FLU. NO SEA SMITH FAULT.
- SILLY COUNTRY NOT EVEN HAVE SEA OR OCEAN. THEM CHANGE NAME NOT SEA SMITH FAULT!
- FAT HOOMAN TOO BIG FOR ANY HORSE – SEA HORSE TOO.
- THIS NO SEA SMITH FAULT, IT EVOLUTION IN ACTION.
THIS NO SEA SMITH!
COME ON IN, WATER FINE!
If I were a fish….
Would
First
SEA SMITH ALWAYS “WOULD”… FISH OR NO FISH.
“If I were a fish, but then again, no.
Or a creature who swam the oceans, in a traveling rape shooowww…”
SEA SMITH SEE THAT THIS LAND HOOMAN GET IT.
I wish, I wish, I wish I was….
A FISH!!
/The Incredible Mr. Limpet
SEA SMITH LIKE THOUGHTS OF HUEY LONG – “I WISH ALL THE LADIES WAS FISHES, AND I WAS THE KINGFISH!”
A fish won’t do anything but swim in a brook
He can’t write his name or read a book
And to fool the people is his only thought
Though he slippery – he still gets caught
But then if that sort of life is what you wish
You may grow up to be a fish
I was in the ocean all last week, Steve.
Where the hell were you?!?
Sorry…Sea.
Your cousin Steve was no match for me, your yeti brother Snow Smith was pathetic. Looks like the Smith family is all talk.
Talk like that might get you “Dursted”…
Or even Kirsten Dunsted.
Ice fishing on the great lakes doesn’t count,
Or does it?
Our poor great lake hasn’t frozen over for the past couple of years. And it’s the shallowest one.
SEA SMITH VERY BUSY. HE HAVE WORK WITH RUSSIA…https://www.militarytimes.com/news/your-military/2018/10/30/russias-only-aircraft-carrier-is-damaged-when-dock-sinks-crane-punches-huge-hole-in-ship/
MAKE SURE RUSSIAS NO FIX SHIP! LONG SWIM FROM RUSSIA TO TUNDRA!
Why worry?
/Idiots
I understand. Next time.
THEN SEA SMITH ASK…”HOW YOU DOIN’ ?”
I have, for primarily the reason cited, never felt compelled to spend any time on a cruise ship.
I would be bored out of my mind,
I would be toilet-huggin, snot-slingin, drunk for the duration
Exactly, I already do that at home, may as well save the cash
Get drunk enough and your bed feels like a cruise?
SEA SMITH NO GIVE NOROVIRUS OR HANGOVER!
JUST POUNDING SENSATION IN ASS!
^HE GET IT.^
Yeah. Cruises are a pass for me too.
SEA SMITH SAD…
I like cruising because I don’t have to constantly pack and unpack.
SEA SMITH HAPPY HOOMANS GO CRUISE…
That’s what makes a visit to Thailand so much fun.
But the tucking chafes after a few days…
Not as much as the clap.
…uh, or so I’ve heard.
I like cruising because I don’t have to constantly pack and unpack.
So now you’re living on the air in Cincinnati?
I guessed WKRP, but had to look it up to be sure.
SEA SMITH LIKE MASCOT!
Whoa…meta
1978 era Bailey Quarters and I’m there. Man, Ii would have eaten the peanuts out of her shit (not really but…)
The girlfriend keeps wanting to go on one, not understanding that it would be a living hell for me. Part of what I like the most about traveling is asking around to find the best local places, and places off the beaten path. That’s not really possible when you’re stuck on a cruise ship.
You nailed it. We did a cruise for our honeymoon and will never go again. Just when a place was starting to get interesting, you had to get back on the goddamn boat!
We were in Aruba and a taxi driver took us to a out-of-the-way beach that was amazing. He came back to pick us up and said he had arranged a table at a club his cousin owned
The piano bar on board was fun, though. The poor dude had to play this classic like a million times for me.
One of the best days I had in Dublin was stopping in a local pub while the girlfriend went on tours. I wound up spending several hours talking to a local couple sharing cultural differences between our two countries, and trading rounds back and forth.
The second best time was wandering into a pub where if my grandfather was a regular there, I’d still be the new guy. The regulars were trash talking the bartender, and I knew I was accepted when the bartender gave me shite for ordering a Beamish (that they had on tap!).
Slattery’s or gtfo! I had so much fun there. Very hard core Irish republican. Some harsh assed traditional Irish songs. Stayed there all night.
I went to Slattey’s a couple of times, but it got all classed up since one of the big celebrity chefs (Anthony Bourdain) ate there. This was the fooking old school bar.
I hate when that happens!
They still had all the garb hanging on the walls, but there was no rebel music being sung there. I was greatly entertained that the most authentic things about the Irish pubs in Cleveland was the sobriety test stairs to go down to the bathrooms.
One day I was talking to some locals who twigged that we were tourists (my Midwestern accent stood out a bit) and asked if we went to Temple Bar. I admitted to stopping in for a pint, then leaving. They still said I spent too much time there.
lyrics I remember (this was 1997 or so):
“You dare to call me a terrorist, while you stare down the barrel of your guns”
Then, at the end of the night they played the Irish national anthem and one guy was too drunk to stand. After the anthem, like 5 guys were trying to kick his ass, but they were too drunk to achieve it. good fucking times!
Also, it was north of the magic line that tourists were supposed to not cross. I loved Erie!
My wife and I had a free 4-day cruise as a work reward. It was okay. Would not do it again with my own money.
My parents did a river cruise in Europe and liked it a lot. Lots of stops in Germany and France.
I would consider one of those Rhine river cruises over a sea cruise for sure. I heard the Yangtze cruises in China are interesting too though I’d rather not visit that country again given the direction they’re going.
The real high end schnizzle is canal cruises. I would definitely consider one of those in France.
I did a 5 day Yangtze river trip back in 1988 – long before the dams were built. Tourism was still very primative at the time. Dirt cheap though. 5 days from Wuhan to Chong ching in a 2-person room cost $90
Same here.
The only time I’ve been tempted was for a cruise through the Panama canal. I think it would be great fun to go through the locks.
I routinely cruise on a sailboat. A small group of friends crossing around the water and spending some nights underway and other in a quiet anchorage is great freedom.
I would rather be chained to bench in a Roman war galley than ever go on a cruise ship.
I’ll be in the green swamp this weekend. I’ll try to kill a skunk ape for you guys.
YOU LEAVE SKUNK APE ALONE! COUSIN STEVE SMITH GO COLLEGE WITH SKUNK APE. THEM FRIENDS!
SKUNK SMITH?
Is that like Skunk Baxter ?
NOT over-rated
Only if he’s a defence analyst..
Man does know his missiles.
I hate to break it to you but those are just escaped pet chimps that have been rooting through a dumpster. That said, if you run across one killing it might be the safe bet.
I’ve always said non-Native species should be killed sight.
*glares at Snow birds*
“It makes absolutely plausible two of our biggest state interests – membership in NATO and EU,” it said.
Lucky you.
Now would be a funny time to pull out of NATO. FU North Macedonia!
Why do we continue to let these piss ant countries who can’t really meaningfully contribute to the mission into NATO?
The mission of NATO is to provide a common defense structure for the member countries against the Warsaw pact countries.
That being said, pissant countries are contributing exactly as much towards fulfilling the mission of NATO as the U.S. is.
Counting the USSR as one country, there were 8 Warsaw Pact countries. Currently all but one of them is in NATO. Call me crazy, but it may be time to dissolve NATO.
North Macedonia High School football rules!!
Charity worker, 28, died of fatal head injury from leaning out of moving train…Miss Roper worked for the Welsh Refugee Council charity and was chairman of Young Socialists Cardiff.
Each according to her needs.
She was leaning out to puke. Can’t classify that under stupid human tricks.
I didn’t see that in the article, but you’re probably right. Somehow I’ve managed not to get my head smashed in by a tree despite decades of drinking. Guess I’m lucky.
“A woman who died after suffering serious head injuries while leaning out of a train window to be sick ignored a warning sticker, a report has found.”
Thanks. The weird wording of that threw me off.
Maybe she was just doing a sick pose for snapchat.
You can when the sign next to the window says “don’t do that”.
You’d think those eyebrows would have offered some protection.
It looks like Groucho Marx and Brooke Shields were her parents.
too soon?
Never too soon to dis on the 1″x2″ eyebrow fad. Whadda fuq are they thinking?
Yes, we should be in mourning over the death of a young woman that tirelessly worked to advance an immoral and murderous ideology.
Any guesses on what Trump’s nickname for Tulsi Gabbard is going to be?
Dot Pocahontas
Pineapple Curry ?
Sugar tits.
Hotsi Tulsi
Friday Night TITTAYS.
http://archive.li/s2Bew
Wildcard!
I stopped at 1.
Any and all
Second.
9 because Guinness.
EVOLUTION IN ACTION.
“Oath of Fealty” is a good book.
Meh, just read it again, doesn’t stand up IMO
Imagine such an article focusing on cheating men.
https://www.yourtango.com/2019320512/why-do-women-cheat-the-reason-for-infidelity-adultery-and-why-a-cheating-wife-has-an-affair
It’s downright laudatory.
Men and women are the same, except for when they aren’t
“When men have affairs, it’s “boys will be boys.” When women cheat, it’s a whole other story.”
B
U
L
L
S
H
I
T
“There was no sex in the marriage, and I felt my husband did not pay attention to me or consider my needs. I felt like I was coming last in everything,”
Typo?
I understand that people are into various types of non-monogamy, and that’s their business as long as they’re open about it. But cheating is despicable, and it’s stupid that there’s a push to justify women’s infidelity as “rediscovering their worth as women” or “seeking satisfaction that they don’t get from their husbands”.
Shit like this is why the MGTOW movement has come into being (I wouldn’t consider myself one of them, but I definitely understand where they’re coming from). Feminism has worked very hard to erase any incentive for men to get married. They already take a massive financial risk by binding themselves legally and financially to a woman. Now, even basic fidelity is apparently asking too much.
Karen Straughn had a good video about this. Sorry I couldn’t find it, but any of her stuff is worth a watch. She’s also in Honey Badger Radio, who go over male/female issues.
For sure. What adults agree to do is one thing, and if that’s a non-monogamous relationship then great. But cheating on someone is a different animal entirely, and trying to justify your self-centered moral weakness is just doubling down on the wrong. If the relationship isn’t working, leave. If it’s a marriage, get a divorce. If you don’t want to leave because of the kids, or because money, or because of whatever other thing, well, them’s the breaks, pal. Marriage isn’t going steady with tax benefits. It shouldn’t be entered into lightly, taken lightly, or left lightly.
COMMON SENSE TRAIN CONTROL
BAN ASSAULT TRAINS
Related…are train trips nicer than cruise ships?
No. I hate trains. Amtrak from Jacksonville to NYC broke me from riding trains ever again.
Amtrak
I think I found your problem.
The Boston to DC corridor is decent. I like the Acela. Not coincidentally, the only part of Amtrak that makes a profit.
Never been on a cruise, but I think they typically have more booze and women in skimpy bathing suits.
So, no. No they are not.
I got roaring drunk with some strangers on a train from Chicago to New York once, but you’re right – no skimpy bathing suits.
Was one of them Robert Walker?
Sure. And I’m a handsome young tennis player, too.
Someone has been watching the Love Boat.
I once rode from Moscow to Beijing via Ulan Bator. It was an adventure but I cannot imagine doing it again.
I can’t imagine being any of those three cities or their corresponding countries.
I can’t imagine I will ever see Russia or Mongolia again. China is a possibility mostly because it’s a short flight from where I live and I still speak enough of the language to get around.
I have friends that love going on cruises. It’s always struck me as purgatory on the high seas.
I think Tulsi Gabbard and AOC need to mud wrestle.
I’d buy that for a dollar.
I hate big boats, but I LOVE little boats. Once, though, I took the ferry from Wales to Ireland with about 6 friends. After we got about a mile out we hit some really big seas. This ferry was massive and it was rocking up and down and back and forth like 30 feet! the whole boat (like 200 people) hit their seats and barfed simultaneously. The only people who seemed OK were about 8 of us who were playing blackjack on the tiny upper deck, looking down on the chaos in the main cabin. Other than the stench it was pretty entertaining to see.
“I hate big boats, but I LOVE little boats.”
Euphemism?
Everyone enjoys motor boating.
https://media.giphy.com/media/n1oxxtKBrudYA/giphy.gif
Man in the boat overboard
Second.
I blame global warming.
Sssh…. it’s “climate change” now.
So true north and magnetic north are about to align. That’s pretty cool.
‘Bout time. Damn hippy magnetic North. Getting stoned and wandering around all the time.
I saw an article on this that made a warming/change tie in. Since now ships can make the northwest passage because of the warming/change the movement of the magnetic pole will make that more dangerous!
“Cept compasses have always been virtually useless that far north. Too bad GPS hasn’t been invented yet.
The Macedonia article reminds me that I’m still reading “Black Lamb and Grey Falcon”. It’s quite a slog but it has its interesting moments. I put it aside this week to work on other things. Maybe I’ll make some progress this weekend.
If I remember correctly, “don’t stick your head out of a high speed train” was part of a George Carlin bit.
A Kavanaugh bit, too.
HEY-OHH!
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=2pgzWRVEqHY
Playing MWO. What I like about this Atlas: I feel invincible. The problem with this Atlas: I feel invincible. My instinct is to keep pushing forward to punish the puny ‘Mechs before me, and soak a lot of crossfire, getting torn apart.
Are you pre-ordering MechWarrior 5?
I still prefer the turn based versions.
I already did. I was waiting for MW5 since the first trailer for what turned from a single player game into MWO – so my reaction was “Shut up and take my money”.
🙁 I just want one win this evening…
I’ve been on a killer losing streak.
(._.)
I had to switch to the goddamn Raven, but I finally got my victory. Gunned down a Kodiak*, legged a Flea, picked up half a dozen kill assists on top of that.
*idiot kept his rear armor towards me. Not sure if he even realized he was getting shot from behind.
The reason I put up legging the Flea with knocking out a 100 ton assault ‘Mech using a scout is because those bastards are annoying, and this guy figured he could circle strafe around the light with the slow-firing large laser. Try doing that without a knee actuator, and learn to aim.
https://www.foxnews.com/politics/south-carolina-congressman-stopped-from-entering-house-floor-with-beer-in-hand.amp
What a bunch of party killers.
No kidding. Everybody in Congress knows you’re supposed to do your drinking BEFORE you walk into the chamber.
I’m so glad AOC didn’t think of this, because then we’d be subjected to a week of “Republican hypocrites FREAK OUT because AOC likes beer!!!!”.
It was a gift. He wasn’t going to drink it. This is why I’ll never go into government
I thought he had invited Justice Kavanaugh over for some hijinks. And by hijinks I mean…
Train game?
Boofing?
Leftists Demand Sleep Reparations
Um…wut? Well, I guess I’m black because I usually only get about 5 hours of sleep (or less) a night. And using their logic, my slavic ancestors have also earned me a perpetual vacation.
So articles about the aviation system are infuriating since, well, that is my field. First, the media is lumping TSA into the system and they have nothing to do with how well the NAS runs. Second, the safety of the system isnt even being impacted.
Internally, I can see our reliability of the equipment and we are still looking at a 99% uptime for all systems, so Air Traffic has everything they need to do what they do…separate aircraft. I will say we are in a critical restoration only mode, but our shit rarely breaks to the point aircraft cant operate safely in airspace. So that really isnt impacting.
Staffing was normal the last few weeks and I am sure next week wont be much different. The agency has a lot of leeway in terms of leave abuse so a noticeable increase next week will look highly suspicious in my opinion.
If airports are shutting down gates, that’s on the authority that controls them, counties or cities, not the FAA.
There’s a name for it, but I’m drawing a blank. It has to do with when you read a news article about something you understand better then the reporter, and you see all the mistakes they make. The common person then forgets all that when reading an article that they don’t have that level of understanding about.
/Has read too many terrible computer stories.
Gell-Mann Amnesia
Gell-Mann Amnesia?
Gell…what were we talkin bout?
Macedonia’s parliament passed an amendment to the constitution on Friday to rename the country Republic of North Macedonia, in line with an agreement with Greece to put an end to a 27-year-old dispute.
Government dealing with the real issues.
Enh, it’s better than going to war with Greece. ‘Cause you know it would happen eventually.
Shows how truly sophisticated those Europeans are compared to us primative ‘mericans.
Charity worker, 28, died of fatal head injury from leaning out of moving train and hitting tree branch at 85mph after ignoring warning sticker reading ‘do not lean out of window’
Charles Darwin strikes again! (I may be a bad person, given that this was my immediate reaction.)
They don’t trim the trees back from the roadbed where trains go 85 mph? Even Amtrak wouldn’t be that stoopid.
MUH KULCHOORUL PROPEEASHUN
https://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/ny-news-designer-accused-fetishization-women-20190111-story.html
So, an Asian woman complaining about a black woman’s clothing design?
*checks scorecard*
Nope, Asian women are the white women of women of color, so she’s punching down. Complainer gets a timeout, all points go to the designer.
East German judge demures, goes back to licking her own balls…
Submitted without comment.
https://www.redstate.com/alexparker/2019/01/11/huck-magazine-nemis-melancon-golden-photographed-naked-violet-chachki/
Just don’t let your kid walk two blocks to the park alone; CPS’ll getcha!
She should be run out of town on a rail.
Thought that maybe redstate was exaggerating. Looked at pic. Nope.
You’re on a list now, I think.
Is she even old enough? Tulsi Gabbard says she will run for president in 2020
“I have decided to run and will be making a formal announcement within the next week,” the Hawaii Democrat told CNN’s Van Jones during an interview slated to air at 7 p.m. Saturday on CNN’s “The Van Jones Show.”
Gabbard, an Iraq War veteran, currently serves on the House Foreign Affairs Committee. She is the first American Samoan and the first Hindu member of Congress.
“There are a lot of reasons for me to make this decision. There are a lot of challenges that are facing the American people that I’m concerned about and that I want to help solve,” she said, listing health care access, criminal justice reform and climate change as key platform issues.
She’s the first cookie that can’t be made/served with milk to be served in Congress?
The first Presidential Candidate that gets a firm”would” from the majority of the gliberati.
Second.
I’m gonna sit that one out and have beer with Rhywun and Tonio instead.
Fag.
Racist is more accurate.
Racist fag.
Let’s put this thread on Twitter. Test my question below.
Someone make an eye doctor appointment for Straff.
My wife is hotter and not a sleazy pol.
A. Good for you
B. I guess I was looking at her as if she was a normal person. Thinking about her as a politician drops a few points, for sure.
Hate fucking is no way to treat the little guy between your legs that has been with you through thicc and thinn.
Wait…you know Mini-Mike?
But probably not the first who worships a god with an elephant head.
Wasn’t that Tyler?
Well, she’s way hotter than Hillary. Also, far less corrupt, but you could say that last one about Maduro.
I…I think I’d rather snuggle with Donald if anything SF has described about the once and future Queen be true.
A human right.
https://www.teenvogue.com/story/sexual-pleasure-is-a-human-right
right (n): an entitlement that exists by virtue of natural law.
1+1 = 3.
Sooooo, what they’re saying is that all those “incels” actually have a point?
Except for incels, of course, ‘cos they’re icky.
There is a context in which it, like healthcare, is a right. You have the right to acquire it through voluntary exchange.
Like all positive rights one has to ask the question – “provided by who?”
This crow could have some fun with that.
Is anyone else going to take notice of the fact that the author’s last name is “Mofokeng”?
I don’t think Teen Vogue even takes itself seriously any more.
So are rapists just exercising their rights? Sounds problematic.
This has to stop.
On Monday, 10-year-old Canadian boy Nemis Quinn Mélançon-Golden was featured in a troubling Huck Magazine piece highlighting the life of a so-called “child drag queen.”
Young Nemis, whose drag name is “Queen Lactacia,” was shot by photographer Jonathan Frederick Turton for the spread. In one of the shots that did not make the magazine, Nemis, in full drag makeup and a black dress, is posing for a photo with the Season 7 winner of “RuPaul’s Drag Race,” Violet Chachki. In the shocking photo, Violet is wearing nothing but a pair of heels and a small piece of fabric covering his genitals
I mean, this really has to stop.
This culture is so fucked. It may not be today, it may not be tomorrow. But some day soon, were going to experience real hardship and these people are going to starve to death en masse because they spent more time teaching their kids to pose naked in heels than on basic survival skills.
I’m missing the part that’s bad.
Aesthetically, I don’t like watching all the people around me starve to death because they’re dumbasses. Not much beyond that.
It does interfere with the lawn ornaments so…..
No kidding, these parents living vicariously through their supposedely trans kids is just nuts.
That they named their boy-child “Nemis-Quinn” should have set off the first round of fireworks.
Eddie on Absolutely Fabulous had a line, something about how a gay baby was the most fashionable accessory a woman could hope to have – I think it was intended to be outrageous at the time….
It’s just a clump of cells. That’s not a penis. That word punched me in the throat.
Yeah, YouTube channel Beauty and the Beta have gone over that in several of their vids. It seems like the parents are pushing this for their own reasons, and that’s pretty sickening.
Bellas new thing War dog!! She wants to eat your feet, fun stuff
My dog’s thing is to hate me and cower behind the wife. Guess I shouldn’t have made those fart sounds at her a few weeks ago…
It wasn’t the sound…
It was a tiny “pup” sound and I wasn’t looming over her… Oh. Now I get it. Seriously, it does bother me. I just want my dogger to be a happy being. Best just to ignore her neurosis.
Dog farts are dog farts, life goes on…..
.
I actually wrote that,,,
*one solitary tear runs down cheek*
Yes. It was beautiful.
Profound on so many levels…
Just reading “dog fart” caused my brain to recall the smell. Thanks.
If all the comments posted on Glibs had been posted on Twitter instead, what % of us would’ve been booted by now? Even the Mormons here would be toast I’m guessing.
All? Why ask wby?
Whiteboy?
Wiggly-Butted Yugoslavians?
White Boys Yacking
This place is pretty full of hate speech.
‘Specially when y’all been drinkin’.
Tall Cans!!!!!!!
*waves at Yusef*
Howdy!
That’s a blatant fucking lie you Heathen!
*bats eyes innocently*
Wait, are you othering us?
No. Judging.
Ahh. OK, then.
No judshing. Gotcha. You’re a nice lady, Moj… Mojouf… Mojuice.
^^^ Designated Driver, Shhh, he don’t know yet…
Wait…wait…no listen…listen. She’s sweet. No, shut up for a second! I mean…she’s…just a…she’s…she’s a nice person!
My all-time favorite when they’re trying to talk you into taking one for the team “She’s got real pretty eyes!”
I’m always the designated driver. It’s my purpose in life.
Don’t judge me. At least until after the swimsuit competition.
jarflax in the swimsuit competition
Less belly hair more beard, but in the ballpark.
Whew, it’s a good thing I’m such a saint when I’m not drinking.
A sphincter says what?
What? Ezactly
HEY! Im sober for once.
And it doesnt agree with me one bit.
Poor bastard.
Bring-downs and bullying! But we’re the Oliver Twist of the internet – “Please Sir, can I have some more?’
But since all the hate speech is directed at Winston’s mom, would Twitter really care that much?
That’s not hate speech!
No, not as long as they got there first!
That’s silly, who uses that old site?
Side-by-side comparison: Zero Hour! (1957) Vs Airplane! (1980)
Oh, wow.
Aw, hell. It’s not on Prime anymore.
Well, I guess I have to add Zero Hour to my watch list.
That’s awesome:)
Have you been listening to Carolla or wild coincidence?
“Macedonia will start using it only after the parliament in Athens also ratifies the agreement.”
I’m counting on you Athens for the big FU.
Give them awhile, they’ll need to think about it.
If Athens objects let me suggest The Place Alexander Came from Before he Conquered the Greeks. Optionally you can add a Suck it Helene Bitches.
“We hereby resolve that the country currently known as ‘Greece’ shall henseforth be referred to as ‘Macedon’s Bitch'”
“Macedon’s Bitch, Bitches!”
Macedonia McMacedonia Face
So, we build a wall, then issue game tags….
LOL!
Hey, it worked for East Germany…….
I have to stay late at work because somebody got gored by an antelope. I’m not pleased.
I am pretty sure this is a “pics or it didn’t happen” situation.
I’m not legally allowed to take pictures at work. Something to do with a hippo.
So you do in fact work at a zoo?
Some days it fells that way.
http://www.onlyhealthy.com/understanding-the-hipaa-law/
I am familiar with hipaa. The law whose stated purpose was to protect patient’s access to and control of their medical records, which in fact made those records the property of the caregiver, and utterly screwed patients.
An antelope?
It’s when the father in law says “No”.
*squints disapprovingly*
*makes a facial expression in such a way as to convey displeasure at the wordplay just employed by the previous commenter*
*sigh*
You’re doing it wrong.
Isthmus Leer?
In Florida? You work in a zoo?
I work in a hospital, the patient works with the antelope.
Apparently not well.
#workplaceViolence #religionOfPeace
Also I learned antelope can make a really deep hole in your butt meat.
Serengeti Smith?
LOLsnort
HAHA. DEEP HOLE, INDEED.
/STEVE SMITH
Jesus. You’re serious? Antelopes in Florida?
Poor person had a five inch deep hole in their butt
Owwie.
So, just a flesh wound?
I love the ol’ ‘it’s just a flesh wound canard’.
Flesh includes arteries and nerves. Oooooooow it just got me in my shoulder! Yeah, and it cut your brachial artery and nerve. If you dont bleed out in 60 seconds your arm will be paralyzed forever. Don’t worry too much though, you are going to have a stroke and be 80% a vegetable so you wont notice.
That’s the joke!
I had a very loose acquaintance from high school who nicked her heel on something or other and had an abiding bacterial infection that seemed to take years to clear up, nearly lost her foot to it, and she always made the “flesh wound” joke.
Er.
This would make an excellent Monty Python’s Flying Circus segway.
That’s funny you mention that. “My hovercraft is full of eels” was one of my first thoughts.
Ministry of silly vehicles?
I wish I could blame speech to text, or autocomplete, but that was all me. I own it, I’m a maroon.
Case is done. Have a goodnight and good weekend!
Wilt thou leave us so unsatisfied?!
I don’t know why that immediately came to me in Zapp Brannigan’s voice.
Should we allow a man to be butt gored by an antelope?
Kif! Get me my phaser and anti-antelope cream!
Florida Man gets gored by Florida Antelope…
Sorry, without proof this is complete and utter bullshit, even for Florida.
In the last thread I posted some links to the band Mandolin Orange. Extraordinary instrumentation and vocals.
Now this chick. Totally different style but really remarkable vocalist.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NPH9j0qVM3A
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fFNofGHHozg
Reminds me of ’60s European stuff.
Getting some Regina Spektor vibes off this one.
A guy is sitting at the doctor’s office.
The doctor walks in: ‘Sir, I have some bad news. I’m afraid you’re going to have to stop masturbating.’
Patient: ‘I don’t understand, doc. Why?’
Doctor: ‘Because I’m trying to examine you.’
How do you know that you have a high sperm count?
She has to chew before she swallows.
What does old pussy taste like?
Depends.
Two deer walk out of a gay bar.
One says to the other, ‘Man, I can’t believe I blew forty bucks in there!’
A man is sitting at the bar, his head in his hands.
Bartender: What’s the matter buddy?
Man: It’s the worst thing ever. I caught my wife in bed with my best friend.
Bartender: Oh man that really sucks! What did you do?
Man: I told her to pack her shit and get the hell out!
Bartender: What about your best friend?
Man: I looked him straight in the eyes and said BAD DOG!
What’s worse than waking up at a party and finding a penis drawn on your face?
Finding out it was traced.
Or tattooed.
… and the video has already been uploaded
That joke gets better with inflation.
“What does old pussy taste like?”
Ever lick a nine volt battery?
Good lord, sir, I say good lord!
Headline: FBI opened investigation into whether Trump was working for Russia after firing Comey
Alternate headline: Members of the unaccountable secret police retaliate against the elected chief executive after firing the corrupt head of their agency
Shut it down. There’s no way to reform that tar pit.
You can’t fire me!
Is that part of Mueller’s fishing expedition or a different one? I can’t keep up.
McCabe was the one who did it, based on the dossier. Fucking totalitarian dirtbag.
Goddamn the lakers suck
Good morning Gliberati
Good morning, Pie.
Apparently Romanians pay on average 26% of monthly expenses on food compared with 11% for the richer EU countries… then again we also are near the top for food waste
Apparently the city hall of Iasi bought 10000 snow shovels to give out for free…
Nestle is closing its Romanian factory
Romania officially took over the Presidency of the Council of the European Union
this was the morning update
No Quantum of Solace for you!
*genuinely confused*
The ‘James Bond’ movie Quantum of Solace is loosely based on a South American deal Nestle water did, where they bought water rights to land in an arid region to produce bottled water.
Crazy person link.
water is not a fundamental human right silly link person
Shoulda Nestle dipped the Bond girl instead of drowning her in oil, then… kinda confused the whole subplot, tbh.
I didn’t write the damn thing.
If I wrote a bond movie, it would probably start off with him visiting the Vatican to denounce his ways, but it’s subterfuge so he can kill commie pope who work for the Bulgarians, because they need more mainstream exposure. Then after the dancing girls in the gun barrel the rest of the movie would follow 007 as he retires to find how pussified Britain has becomes and turns vigilante.
ANSWER FOR IT, DAMN YOU
Oh, I forgive you.
I want to design a new style of hot dog bun, but have no idea where to get a speciality bread tray made. Today’s world is lacking in blacksmiths.
Google ‘sheet metal fabrication’?
All I get are links to KKK robes, damn google history! (For those without a sense of humor, this a joke, I make my own KKK robes)
https://youtu.be/C8dLWjVZWvw
gay
Woah! Completely unrelated, was watching George Lam videos and came across him doing a Cantonese cover of their eponymous song:
https://youtu.be/gPJQUGarDN4
I am finishing up the Christmas blend coffee I got as a office secret Santa gift. Not bad but I still don’t get what is Christmas about it.
It has Kopi Luwak, only instead of whatever critter the let predigest those beans, these are predigested by reindeer. BTW coffee people are odd. The only proper predigested beverages are digested by yeast.
Also from reading that article I now want to go beat an ecowarrior to death with a rabid mink. Wild Civets are ‘stress free’ while the poor farmed Civet that is kept caged to be fed and its poop collected are horribly stressed. It’s like these people have never been within 20 feet of a wild animal. Hint to the greens out there, there is a reason almost everything lives longer in captivity. Pretty much every wild animal is infested with parasites and periodically goes hungry enough to starve out the weak. They do not gambol. Gamboling is not a thing that happens in the wild. Any animal that begins to gambol gets eaten by something nasty.
Dude: Trung Nguyen. Seriously, it’s awesome.
That was supposed to be reply to Pie or Jarflax. Whatevs.