The episode begins with Macy in the bathtub. So, you know, if that’s your thing, we’re starting out strong this week. She’s listening to classical music with her earbuds in, bubbles strategically covering the parts that matter, some kind of moisturizing mask on her face (look, I know I’m a girl, but I have never used one of those in my life and honestly have no clue how they work). Behind the shower curtain, a shadow appears. It’s definitely a man, and he definitely looks like he’s holding a machete.
Macy’s eyes open, and she sees the shadow, screams, and hurls the silhouette away along with the shower curtain, which tangles the figure up. The shadow yells and yeah it’s Harry.
WHAT?
- Why is Harry in their house at 1:00 a.m.?
- Why is Macy taking a bath at 1:00 a.m.?* I’m a night owl but that’s late for even me.
- Why is Harry, even if he’s staying in their house, going in the bathroom when Macy’s in there taking a bath?
- Why does Harry need to use the bathroom at all? I thought he was dead? He’s apparently the type of ghost that can be seen, can interact with ordinary humans and hold tenured faculty positions, can eat and drink, and apparently sleeps and uses the bathroom. Are we sure he’s dead? Is there a purpose to him being dead? Because it makes no sense whatsoever.
* Answer: “1:00 a.m. baths are my safe space.” (Real Dialogue Alert: That was the real dialogue.)
Maggie comes running out of her room wanting to know what’s going on at one in the freaking morning. Macy is apologizing to Harry, who has done nothing to deserve this apology because YOU DON’T GO IN THE BATHROOM WHEN SOMEONE IS TAKING A BATH UNLESS YOU’RE OF THE SAME GENDER AND RELATED TO THEM BY BLOOD, okay? You’re a dude—if you need to pee, there are plenty of alternatives for you that are much easier for you than they would be for a dudette. At the very least, you knock and ask if you can come in, you don’t just stroll in. Honestly.
Anyway, what was the purpose of this? Fan service + exposition, that’s what. Harry tersely reminds them that while the Elders are… something… he has to stay with them… because reasons. So now he’s living in their attic, I guess. The Elders apparently have the Book of Shadows…? There’s not more than one copy…? So I guess Harry has to live there when the Book of Shadows… I have no fucking clue, guys. Anyway, he’s mad because HE wanted to take a 1:00 a.m. bath, goddammit.
This… scene, if we can call it that, is interrupted by Mel staggering in yelling at them all to shut up because she has to get up early tomorrow to go to detective partner’s funeral. I still can’t believe they copped (??) out and killed him like that.
At the funeral, Niko recaps what we “learned” about him in the last episode, Mel tells her not to keep replaying it because she’s sick of hearing it it will only make her feel worse, and they make a date for dinner that evening. They leave the graveside only for a young man to approach the grave as they depart. He’s holding flowers in his hand. He’s probably detective partner’s gay lover. Hilltowne, Michigan apparently has a high percentage of F.O.D.s.
Just kidding. He’s a demon. His eyes glow and he turns into smoke and disappears into the freshly tilled earth. Guess we haven’t seen the last of detective partner after all!
Over at the Generic Science Lab, Macy is preparing to give a presentation. Some guy comes in, shaking her hand and addressing her as “Dr. Vaughn”. Oh, so she’s a doctor. She said she was 28, right?
Mm-kay. Well, I guess she wasn’t busy getting laid during that time, so she had a lot of time on her hands.
Anyway, this guy turns out the be the CEO of Morningstar Biotech. He also… possibly is the guy who took the paint can from Charity in the last episode? I dunno, white guys all look alike. Regardless, I don’t trust him. But his company has done a lot of things with epigenetics, whatever that is, and he’s looking to bring Macy into his fold because she’s such a prodigy and all.
While Macy stands there with her jaw dropped at this proposition, a sassy Gaysian who I guess has worked there all along but I’ve never seen him before appears behind her and tells her she better not blow it. Macy asks where Friendzone is as they were supposed to prep their presentation together beforehand. Gaysian is like, “Girlfriend, haven’t you heard the news? He’s been sucked into the Summer Sex Craze!” It may be November, but Friendzone has picked up a BBW named Summer in the time since the last episode. Wait, does BBW stand for Beautiful Black Woman or Big Beautiful Woman? Regardless, Summer is both (if by big you mean tall, because she’s pretty svelte), and Friendzone can’t keep his tongue out of her mouth, even in the Generic Science Lab. Macy is unhappy about this development. Did you lose your virginity to him, Macy? That was never really made clear.
Meanwhile, Niko had an appointment with an FBI agent to discuss what she knew about detective partner, which apparently wasn’t much. The agent gives her his card as she leaves, and as she walks away, he turns to face the camera—HE’S THE DEMON FROM THE CEMETERY! I’D RECOGNIZE THAT WHITE NATIONALIST HAIRCUT ANYWHERE! So, what, is everyone a demon in this episode? Because, frankly, I’d be surprised if Friendzone’s new BBW isn’t a demon. This show isn’t known for its nuanced writing.
At some coffee cart somewhere (on campus…?), Maggie has met up with Regina George. You know something’s wrong because Regina has her hair up in a bun and is only wearing a normal human amount of makeup, and thus looks like a regular person instead of a Stepford Wife. Over pumpkin spiced lattes, Regina informs Maggie that Connerparkerdude has dumped her. Maggie is appropriately sympathetic until Regina states that she knows he must have been cheating on her, because there’s no reason he would have dumped someone as perfect as her if he wasn’t cheating, and she’s going to get vengeance by finding out just who the trollop is.
This seems psychotic but okay.
She enlists Maggie to be the one to do her snooping for her so that she can keep her hands clean. What? Are we in the mob now? She then pulls Maggie into a hug, and Maggie reads her mind to hear her thinking, “Thank God I have Maggie, she’s the only one I trust.”
What a great Kappa sister Maggie is going to make!
Back at the house, Mel and Niko are having dinner, but Niko is too upset to eat. She tells Mel that there’s something she needs to know about detective partner: Just before he died, he told Niko that he’d found a connection between Mel’s mother’s death and the deaths of two other women, one in Santa Fe and one in New Orleans. Presumably these two women were also Elders. I guess they don’t all live in Hilltowne. But Charity was able to apparate into the warehouse when Maggie summoned her, so this doesn’t explain why they keep being so unavailable when the girls need them. Anyway, detective partner had pulled the files on all three of those cases (why the Hilltowne PD would have files on cases in New Orleans and Santa Fe is beyond me), and now no one can find them. Niko is starting to wonder if those three deaths may have been murders, and detective partner stumbled across Something Sinister in his investigation that led to him being murdered himself and then framed for the Halloween deaths.
Mel: REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Mel tells her that she thinks she needs to let it go. Niko presses, saying that she knows Mel always believed that her mother’s death wasn’t accidental, and doesn’t she want the truth? I honestly thought that Mel was going to miss the obvious lie here, which would be: If your partner was killed for this, that means you might be in danger, too. But she actually did finally say this, after first trying and failing to play it off like she didn’t care about her mother’s death anymore. Niko grumbles but sits back down. You know she’s not going to let this go, even though Mel is technically right—if it really was a murder and frame-up job, that would be very dangerous for Niko, too. But you know. Whatever.
Outside detective partner’s home, FBI Agent Demon Guy is on the phone with Epigenetics Demon Guy (I was right, he was the one who took the paint can from Charity last episode). He tells him that he searched the apartment but couldn’t find the DNA vials. What? He also tells him that he defiled the grave (eww), so now he can take the detective’s shape. So I guess he won’t be reanimating his corpse. They have some banter. I have no clue what’s going on.
Maggie comes home carrying some extremely large Sponsor bags and busts Macy Facebook stalking Friendzone and his new BBW. Macy says she doesn’t want to talk about it, so Maggie just feels her up in order to read her mind, as you do. Maggie then says that since she doesn’t need to do her Stalking Homework for Regina George, being as she already knows the harlot who came between her and Connerparkerdude was herself, she’s only too happy to help Macy with her stalking. They login to Maggie’s fake stalking account across all social media platform, Mariah Aguilera.
Is this what people do? Is this why I don’t get along with other humans and live alone in the woods in a hut that stands on chicken legs?
Now Mel and Niko are on the phone. Niko says she appreciates that Mel is worried for her safety, but safety be damned. Mel suggests they take a weekend off and go somewhere quiet to forget about all this. This suggestion jogs Niko’s memory and reminds her that detective partner had a fishing cabin nearby, and this may be where the evidence is hidden. She hangs up on Mel and runs off.
Honestly, at this point, now I’m worrying about her safety. Especially since, as she drives away, she’s followed by FBI Agent Demon Guy.
Back at the house, Maggie is fuh-REAKING out as she sees how perfect and flawless Friendzone’s BBW is turning out to be. She’s an Ivy League-educated sports journalist (wtf) and her podcast was just picked up by NPR. Her social media is filled with bikini pics, as Ivy League-educated sports journalists are known to do. “She’s so perfect, it’s… creepy! Seemingly ageless, hypnotic pull on men, like, a billion accolades, and impeccable nails? She can’t be human.”
Okay, now I’m thinking she’s not really a demon and this is a red herring meant to trick us into thinking she’s a succubus or something when, in reality, she’s just perfect. Because even this show can’t be that obvious, right? Right??
Macy says she refuses to participate in the demonization of another woman. There we go, I wondered where the feminism went this episode. Maggie counters that it’s not demonization if she’s an actual demon. She calls Harry to ask for his feedback. Instead of apparating in, he comes running in with no pants on and carrying an iron.
Sigh.
Harry tells Maggie that her language is problematic (Real Dialogue Alert: that was the real dialogue), but that it’s possible BBW could indeed be a succubus. He also looks at BBW’s photo and says, “My word. She’s supposed to be hot?”
Is that… is that racist?
The three of them decide to investigate. Harry informs them that succubi have wings and tails, but that they disguise these with magic. However, they typically flaunt their true forms with subtle markers such as tattoos or birthmarks in the place where the wings and tail would be. This has no potential to backfire on them, as wings are defintiely not one of the most common tattoos acquired by basic bitches. Maggie and Macy decide to investigate further at the Generic Science Lab’s cocktail party tonight, at which they’re celebrating Epigenetics Demon Guy’s generous and not-at-all-suspicious grant. Harry says he will ask the Elders to send him a succubus banishing spell from the Book of Shadows that they have for some reason, and he’ll text it to them. Cheerio!
Real Dialogue Alert: That was—
Meanwhile, at Ollie Hopnoodle’s Haven of Bliss, Niko has Discovered something. Her partner’s fishing cabin was… honestly a little psychotic. He had a big old pinboard with a shit ton of evidence on it, which seems really inappropriate. Should you be doing stuff like that at a remote fishing cabin instead of, you know, at the police department? On the desk beneath the pinboard is a bag that looks like it’s got a poop sample test in it. I guess this is the “DNA evidence.” Seriously?
Niko grabs the vials and starts photographing the evidence board with her phone. In the midst of this, she’s interrupted by… her dead partner’s reanimated corpse! Or I guess just the FBI Agent Demon Guy masquerading as him. He tells her that he can’t explain right now, but he needs the vials. She just hands them over, of course. He asks her what else she saw. “Everything,” she replies.
Bye, Niko!
The demon punches her in the face, sending her flying against the pinboard and knocking her out cold. He then pulls out a Molotov cocktail and lights that bitch up. The cabin is quickly engulfed in green CGI flames, because why use practical effects when we can just use digital?
Fortunately for Niko, Mel has decided if there’s only going to be one episode this season in which she isn’t a useless bitch, it’s going to be today! Since Niko had blurted out that she was going to her partner’s cabin and its location, Mel was able to track her down and pulls up just in time to find the cabin ablaze. She tries to freeze time, but her powers won’t work on the demon flames. She finds Niko unconscious in the back of the cabin. Unfortunately, they don’t both burn to a crisp here. Mel manages to wake Niko up and the two stagger out of the cabin just before the roof caves in.
Back in Hilltowne, Macy and Maggie have arrived at the Generic Science Lab’s cocktail party, which is… a bar. Did I miss something? Did the definition of the phrase “cocktail party” change?
For some reason they let Maggie in, even though she’s repeatedly stated that she’s only a freshman. Oh, I know. She actually is 21—she failed kindergarten three times. That would explain everything.
Maggie, Macy, Friendzone and BBW make awkward conversation. BBW, feeling the awkward, excuses herself to the bar. Maggie runs off to join her, leaving Macy to… completely bite Friendzone’s head off for getting with another girl after she blew him off umpteen times. Friendzone irritably explains the definition of the words “friend zone” to her. She blinks blankly at him until Maggie and BBW return with beers. BBW rubs her scent all over Friendzone and they leave. Macy decrees that he’s not acting like himself—it’s definitely not like him to assert himself and not allow himself to be strung along any further by her. He must be succubused!
At the hospital, Mel and Harry, who is now clothed, are standing vigil over Niko. Mel tells him about the green flames she couldn’t freeze. Harry explains this is Hellfire, a type of “supernatural napalm” favored by demons. Mel also tells him that Niko says she saw detective partner; Harry recognizes that they must be dealing with a shapeshifter. Isn’t it nice that we’ve got him around to mansplain everything? Remember the old days of Non-Feminist Charmed, in which the sisters were on their own and had to figure everything out for themselves by sitting down and reading the Book of Shadows?
Harry has Mel forward herself the pictures Niko took on her phone and then delete them off Niko’s device, hoping that maybe when she wakes up she might not remember everything she saw and that this may protect her. Mel is worried the demon may still try to kill her. She asks Harry how they can protect her without telling her about their magic; Harry responds by yelling, “AS FOR YOUR ARGUMENT, I FAIL TO SEE HOW GANGSTA BITCH MUSIC VOL. 2 CAN BE CONSIDERED A RADICAL MANIFESTO!” Looks like Niko’s awake. Harry excuses himself, citing a “Women’s Studies emergency.”
Real Dialogue Alert: All of that was the real dialogue.
Back at the bar, Maggie comes out of the bathroom and runs into—literally—Connerparkerdude. She demands to know why he broke up with Regina George. He says, of course, that it’s because he likes Maggie better. He suggests that they give Regina some time to get over it. Maggie correctly points out that there is no amount of time long enough that would make it okay for her to then date her friend’s ex-boyfriend. I can’t even imagine a scenario in which this would work. Even if presumably Regina George is a senior (which she should be, being the president—usually these are elected in the spring and run a calendar year rather than an academic year, with the president being elected the spring of her junior year and finishing her term in the fall of her senior year—but since this is TV I bet that somehow it will come out that she’s supposed to be a freshman, too) and will be graduating soon, if you ever intend to talk to her after graduation that’s a no, and she’s sure to have friends in the sorority who will think you’re a skank and try to push you out even after she’s gone. Basically, girl, you need to choose. And remember: Sisters before misters.
Meanwhile, across the bar, Sassy Gaysian and his boyfriend are regaling Macy with Star Trek: Voyager lore while she attempts to stalk Friendzone and BBW. They’re making out behind the pool table and OH MY GOD HE HAS A SUCCUBUS MARK ON HIM! SERIOUSLY? SHE REALLY IS A SUCCUBUS. THIS SHOW REALLY IS THAT PREDICTABLE. IT DOESN’T EVEN TRY.
Macy runs to Maggie and tells her that BBW is actually a succubus and that they have to save Friendzone. Maggie asks if maybe she’s actually just misunderstood, or if maybe Macy is being melodramatic. See, BBW told Maggie that she liked her outfit. That’s all it takes.
Friendzone and BBW walk by, and Macy points out that BBW has a basic bitch tattoo: wings and a tail on her tailbone. Maggie proclaims that she always knew that tramp stamps were the work of the devil, and she’s back in the game. That’s all it takes.
Back at the hospital, Niko is asleep again and a nurse comes in, telling Mel that she needs to give Niko an injection. She’s holding a vial full of bright green liquid. Mel is supicious, glances out the window to the hallway and sees that same nurse outside folding hospital gowns. She freezes the demon, and then… instead of calling Harry to give her a sealing spell or something intelligent, she just SLOWLY WALKS OVER TO THE DEMON and sticks her face right up to the syringe and then TA-DA! The demon springs to life, grabbing her by the throat and lifting her up into the air. They struggle, Mel repeatedly freezing time and then losing her grip, and the demon almost makes it over to Niko with the goddamn syringe before Mel FINALLY calls Harry. He tackles the demon and eventually manages to stab it in the neck with its own poison. It turns into smoke and disappears into the air duct on the ceiling.
IT’S A GOOD THING WE’VE GOT MR. MAN HERE TO—
Niko is discharged and Mel brings her back to the sisters’ house. Mel wants to know why the demon is so focused on Niko instead of her, since she’s the Charmed One. Harry says that shapeshifter demons tend to be singular in nature and refuse to give up on a target once they’ve zeroed in on it, so for whatever reason, now that the demon is after Niko, it’s not going to give up until one of them is dead. Mel knows that even if they manage to kill this demon, Niko will still be at risk as long as she’s near Mel. She asks Harry if there’s a spell that could make it so Niko doesn’t remember they’ve ever met. Harry says there is, but tries to fob her off by reminding her that they don’t have the Book of Shadows for Some Reason. Mel asks him to ask the Elders if they can send her the spell.
Meanwhile, Maggie and Macy have tracked BBW back to her apartment. They knock on the door, BBW answers it, they cast the succubus binding spell on her and… nothing happens. So she’s not a succubus?
BBW, being kind and understanding as well as perfect, sympathetically tells Macy that she understands; she’s also done crazy things while drunk and jealous, and if Macy leaves right now she won’t tell Friendz—
Oh, Friendzone! What are you doing here, dressed in nothing but a towel? And will someone please explain to me what that glowing mark on his hip is if it’s not a succubus mark? Macy points it out to Maggie, but no one but Macy can see it, which makes Macy look even more drunk. BBW kindly informs Friendzone that she left her wallet at the bar and Macy and Maggie were just here to return it to her. The sisters leave with their tails between their legs.
When they get home, Mel has the Book of Shadows, which Harry has brought back from the Elders. What was the purpose of them taking it, again? She asks the others to help her perform a history rewriting spell, which requires the Power of Three. This will undo the past and make it so that Niko and Mel never met, which will further make it so Niko never transferred to Hilltowne from her old position in nearby Lakeville (such originally named cities), adding a further layer of protection. Only Macy, Mel, Maggie, and Harry will have any memory of how things were before. Maggie asks if this will undo detective partner’s death, or even go so far as undo their mother’s death since she was still alive at the time Niko and Mel met. Harry says no, the spell will only affect the living—death is the one thing that can’t be undone.
WHAT? WHAT? WHAT?? BUT DETECTIVE PARTNER IS ONLY DEAD **BECAUSE** NIKO WAS DATING MEL! HOW ARE THEY GOING TO HAVE KILLED HIM IN THIS REALITY IF HE WASN’T KILLED THE WAY HE WAS KILLED?
Harry tells them they need to be absolutely sure before they do this because the consequences can be extreme. Apparently his existence is due to some kind of similar spell, and because of it, he has no memory of his previous life. All he knows is that he died performing some sort of service of Good that the Elders saw fit to reward by turning him into a Whitelighter.
YOU JUST SAID DEATH CAN’T BE—
Harry tells Mel that the evidence Niko found will disappear off her phone after the spell is performed, so they need to analyze that evidence before they conduct the spell because they won’t be able to look at it again. He also tells her every physical trace of their relationship will be gone forever, so you can kiss that Cure album goodbye, bitch.
The girls set up the spell while hipster music wails. Mel goes down to say goodbye to Niko only to find her throwing her shoes on—gotta go back to the cabin with the chief and see if anything is salvageable, gotta solve this case, like a dog with a bone…
Mel has to freeze time in order to keep the maniac from running out the door and dying before they can cast the spell. She tries to say goodbye to her frozen form, but the spell kicks in first. Mel reaches out to kiss her, but she disintegrates into the sands of time and disappears first. This might actually have moved me IF THE EFFECTS WEREN’T SO GODDAMN SHITTY.
The next day, Maggie and Mel are stalking Niko on Facebook. She’s back to wearing the fake glasses she threw away in the second episode (I didn’t recap it, but while she was screaming about all the microaggressions in that episode she announced that her glasses were fake to make people take her seriously, and she stopped wearing them but I didn’t notice it until way later), but otherwise she seems happy. Macy decrees that she thinks it’s not worth it for witches to date. You would say that, now that you’re the one who’s been friendzoned.
Mel says that even if she can’t have Niko anymore, at least she’ll always have the memories. Harry, who has embraced his new role as butler and is cooking them all a full English breakfast, looks uncomfortable about this turn of phrase. Maggie feels bad and tells him that even though he can’t remember his own family, they’re happy to welcome him into their family. Harry tells her that she’s “such an American millennial.”
I honestly have no clue where he was going with that one.
The four of them discuss their next plan of action. Mel describes the evidence she saw, WHICH SHE APPARENTLY DIDN’T SHARE WITH ANYONE ELSE (except possibly Harry) before sending it into the eternal oblivion. The three witches’ bodies all had similar branch-like bruising or some other kind of marking, which Mel asserts she’ll know if she sees again. But her sisters won’t, since the moron didn’t show them the pictures.
Harry tells Macy that the mark she saw on Friendzone, even if it wasn’t a succubus mark, is likely some kind of demon mark, and tells her that he can make a copy of it but she’ll need to get close to him to perform the spell. She does this by going over to his apartment, apologizing for being a diva, and then pulling him to an awkward hug. Mission accomplished.
Maggie, meanwhile, has to go meet with Regina George, with the intention of telling her the truth about Connerparkerdude. This goes about as well as you might expect. Honestly, Regina George has for the most part acted like a normal human being rather than a plastic cunt the last two episodes, so I was definitely on her side here. She gives Maggie the boot from Kappa, which, frankly, she had coming. HOS BEFORE BROS, HO.
Over at the campus, Mel is heading to teach her class, only to find someone else teaching it. Oh, right! The morning of her job interview, she slept through her alarm but Niko woke her up. Since she and Niko never dated, Niko wasn’t there to wake her up, which means Mel now doesn’t have a job. She had a job, I guess? I knew she was a grad student, so I’m guessing this was one of those classes they have grad students teach. But does that really count as a job? Or is she now no longer a grad student at all? I don’t know shit and I doubt the writer of this series does, either. Anyway, unintended consequences! Which apparently only affect Mel, since Friendzone and Regina George were completely unchanged!
At an undisclosed location, FBI Agent Demon Guy and Epigenetics Demon Guy are arguing because neither of them can remember what FBI Agent Demon Guy’s mission was, since Niko has basically disappeared off the timeline. FBI Agent Demon Guy calls Epigenetic Demon Guy “Dad.” Oh, okay. They finally agree that the Charmed Ones must have caused a temporal shift, and they’ll have to figure out another way to get the witch Elders’ DNA.
That’s what was in the poop vials? And detective partner managed to have that how? He managed to get that away from the Santa Fe PD and the New Orleans PD and/or the FBI how?
Epigenetics Demon Guy says that instead of Elder DNA, they should focus on Charmed One DNA instead. And he knows just how to get it… *zoom in on computer with Macy’s Generic Science Lab profile*
Overall thoughts: This one wasn’t too derpy. It was, of course, completely retarded and overflowing with logical errors. But at least (?) it wasn’t political. Not much feminism apart from that one scene where Macy said she didn’t want to demonize other women/Harry called Maggie problematic right before calling BBW ugly. Mel was actually pretty normal in this one rather than a raging cunt. I might have been moved by the scene where Niko was being written out of the tapestry of time if it weren’t for the GODAWFUL shitty 90s-tier CGI. Regina George was written pretty even-handedly, for Regina George. I mean, apart from that psychotic break where she wanted Maggie to investigate the trollop on her behalf so she could end her. But she actually did acknowledge her psychotic behavior in a fit of tears just before Maggie confessed the truth to her, so that warmed me to her.
They better bring the woke back next week or I’ll be out of a job!
Why is Harry in their house at 1:00 a.m.
Booty call?
One more why: why isn’t the bathroom door LOCKED?
I haven’t even read the article yet, because I was too busy enjoying the snark in the captions.
YOU DON’T GO IN THE BATHROOM WHEN SOMEONE IS TAKING A BATH UNLESS YOU’RE OF THE SAME GENDER AND RELATED TO THEM BY BLOOD
An ex-girlfriend of mine, back when she was my girlfriend, liked it when I did that.
Did what now?
Walk in when she was taking a bath. She told me so, something along the lines of, “If I’m taking a bath, don’t worry, you can come on it.”
Can’t tell if intentional or johno
Heh. I did have a high alcohol beer earlier.
Roger that. I thought she was asking that you walk in on her sister taking a bath. Or something.
But I like to pee in the bathtub.
I like to pee into the bathtub.
she failed kindergarten three times. That would explain everything.
I laughed. That’s a good one.
Second.
Whoops. I guess I fucked up a tag.
That’s okay, we’ll just hold you back a year, and you can take HTML 101 again.
Oh good. As long as you don’t make me retake kindergarten.
My kid’s birthday is in October, so he had to take “T” k, and then actual kindergarten the next year. I call it “re-” k. He’s 6 and a half and he’s crazy tall for his age. He towers over all the other kindergarten kids. It’s kinda funny.
Kindergarten was optional when I was eligible (1958) but at that time they taught colors and numbers, both of which Mom had taught me already. As it was, I started First Grade two weeks late because of a family road trip (stick it to the Man!).
I can only imagine watching this show in real life. It would be like a hell where you get ST:TNG episodes, but only the Wesley plot line ones.
I’ll assume this is a fantastic analogy.
Oh, it is.
Pffft! I’m not a big fan, but I’ve seen enough to understand. That is a special hell.
OMG. I don’t know if I’m ready for this. *rolls up sleeves, takes a sip of beverage, dives in*
I had just finished my beer before reading this. It helped.
Is this dumb show at least entertaining as an over-the-top parody of what woke dummies believe? Can you avoid the nosebleeds by going in laughing?
If it was labeled “parody” it would get banned.
“Affectionate homage” any better?
Zing!
Since I know the Buffyverse and not whatever-the-hell this is, I translate every character to its Buffy analog. Therefore every time “Harry” talks I hear Wesley Wyndam-Pryce.
I can’t tell the sisters apart well enough to assign them, though.
I just assume the three are interchangable, because I can’t remember which one is which either.
OK, the gay one is obviously Willow. No idea about the other gals.
The bitchy one is Harmony. And the other bitchy one is Cordelia.
Regina George is Buffy and is the true hero of the series.
I don’t remember WhoTF Regina George is. I may have to review the previous synopses—- ah, fuck it.
The sorority leader one of our heroines stole a boyfriend from (not that she looks interested enough to keep him).
I swear, I still can’t tell the three stooges apart and I read every recap.
Her character’s real name is Lucy but her code name is Regina George because that’s the leader of the Plastics in Mean Girls and she’s essentially the same character.
I never bought Willow as gay. The switch over was too fast.
Supposedly Whedon was toying with either Willow or Xander, hence Larry (side character they suspected of being a werewolf but he turned out to be gay) offering to help Xander come out in Season three.
They foreshadowed Willow with evil universe Willow being gay, but that should be insulting.
Wow, I didn’t know that. I have no memory of a “Larry”. I would have bought a gay Xander even less than gay Willow.
Larry was a great side character. He amused me.
Larry was great, turns up as a bully picking on Xander, they think he’s a werewolf, Xander corners him and tells him he understands what it’s like being..different and having to keep a secret (because of the hyena incident), and Larry screams “All right, I’m gay!” and feels much relieved.
Next time they suspect him, Xander again goes to talk to him about how hard it is to be in the closet, and Larry responds with “Dude, I’m so out I got my grandma setting me up with guys.”
Larry leads the flamethrower group in Season Three finale which…may have been a bit too on the nose, or unintended.
LOL
PS. He is not “interesting” looking at all.
Poor Warwick Davis.
I’ve never seen an episode of Buffy, though I was assured that Charisma Carpenter was very much my type.
Her Playboy spread confirmed that.
She was a smokeshow, if you’re into that sort of thing.
Also, my favorite Angel character.
Still was on Veronica Mars as hot trophy stepmom, years later.
Until the dipshit son turned up.
Thank God, I’m not the only one.
*pops valium*
*pours second bacardi*
*begins reading*
“Answer: “1:00 a.m. baths are my safe space.” (Real Dialogue Alert: That was the real dialogue.)”
*tops it off with half a vicodin*
Should we call you an ambulance, or would you rather just expire?
“*tops it off with half a vicodin*”
Mmm… opiates…
Yeah, I could get into this show with opiates. So long as there’s still a mute button.
YOU DON’T GO IN THE BATHROOM WHEN SOMEONE IS TAKING A BATH UNLESS YOU’RE OF THE SAME GENDER AND RELATED TO THEM BY BLOOD
Back in college when we had 4 bedrooms and one bathroom at the apartment, we’d leave the door unlocked while showering in case anybody had to take a piss, whether it be one of the guys or their girlfriends. It was awkward for all of a week.
Similar situation here. Given the large number of testosterone filled college guys living in close quarters you’re going to walk in on things a lot more uncomfortable than a dude in the shower or taking a piss.
“Is this what people do? Is this why I don’t get along with other humans and live alone in the woods in a hut that stands on chicken legs?”
RUSSIAN BOT!
She gets chicken legs? Lucky Baba
Clucky Baba.
I appreciate your sacrifice for watching this show, but I just can’t do it. I read the snarky picture captions and larfed, but now it’s off to OT posting and whiskey.
I skim. Any more than that and gray matter starts leaking out of my ears.
“Prvious post ERROR – 5 mg of ocycodone. The 42 was clumsy fingers. Sorry. Weed – 72% Sativa, 28% Indica. 18 year old Scotch – three ounces. Oxycodone – 5 mg ground fine and plugged. A-php 100 mg insuflated. 50 mcg LSD. Shrooms at your normal dosage. Adjust for weight. I’m 190.”
https://twitter.com/officialmcafee/status/1125762094803107841
lol
I read every word. It’s brilliant. But I’ve noted that I’m a big Buffy fan, so it’s fun to see it from a different angle – it’s every bit as predictable and ridiculous as this but somehow it worked.
There are a lot of really bad Buffy episodes in between the excellent ones.
Angel was better anyway.
Angel was more consistently mediocre.
Plus they needed to settle on a central location.
Buffy had the same problem post HS.
“white guys all look alike. ”
Wait, what?!?
To be fair, it’s not wrong. We do all look alike.
Nice, I look like George Clooney.
Well, if you’re not missing any facial features…
Gay.
That’s right. Everyone wants some Spud.
Well, I am a meat and potatoes kind of guy.
I thought the phrase was “meat and two veg.”
“The plugger and two pops”
These little fellas are a veg, I guess.
BBW is definitely Big Beautiful Woman (doesn’t mean she can’t also be Black though)
OT: having some very frustrating wifi issues. I have no issues connecting my laptop to my home wifi or most commercial places I go (hotels, etc) – but since Feb I’ve had zero luck connecting to the navy wifi (base hotels). Assuming it’s some sort of windows 10 issue, but not sure what – since my android has no issues connecting to the same wifi connection – even with a VPN enabled.
I spent about an hour on the phone with tech support in Feb – and managed to swing a temp connection after a couple reboots (that randomly quit on me the next day). No such luck since then even though I’m on another base now….
Just bugs me – very frustrating for trying to get any real work done.
Blame the Russians.
A Women’s Studies emergency.
Written by and meant to be consumed by the most vapid girls of 5th through 8th grade.
+1 “girls rule boys drool” tshirt
In case you don’t go back to the other thread. This is the laser I have installed.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01MYQ795U/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1
Easy to install and set up the site.
There are a few options but this looks like the best. Unfortunately the jerks dont include the brand.
https://www.amazon.com/Paddle-Holster-Sauer-Laser-Concealed/dp/B078TDJBZ4/ref=sr_1_14?keywords=holster+sig+p938+with+laser&qid=1557278002&s=gateway&sr=8-14
Should be pretty easy to find plenty — here’s crossbreed’s options for Sig 938 + arma laser
https://www.crossbreedholsters.com/holster/sig-sauer-938-armalaser-tr8
The crossbreed holsters for ArmaLaser TR8 is new. They didn’t support the last December when I bought the pistol.
I will have to check them out.
When I was searching for P365 holsters, there seemed to be a lot more available for the P938. I was kind of jelly.
Did you pick anything yet for the P365? I’m still looking (only casually). Right now I keep in in a DeSantis front pocket holster that’s meant for snubby revolvers, but without a round chambered.
That line is ridiculous enough to make to wonder if it’s all just a joke that we’re in on, but the target demographic isn’t.
From a post-modern perspective that’s actually irrelevant.
I want to believe
I do too, but then I look at the other shows on the CW and doubt. It would have to be one big troll by the showrunner putting it under the noses of the network execs. Possible, but I fear it’s probably just clumsy execution.
Titty Tuesday provides the perfect antidote to terminal woeness.
https://thechive.com/2019/05/07/join-the-dark-side-with-these-sexy-brunettes-50-photos/
All pretty girls look alike.
All ugly girls are ugly in their own way.
(But I’d rather look at the pretty ones.)
Does that mean
A) https://i.pinimg.com/originals/5d/bd/48/5dbd487e03b3631b5da90adc87805fb8.jpg
and,
B) https://i.pinimg.com/originals/a4/65/60/a46560363c8d68ce759d2f1e8d8a17d8.jpg
Look alike? I need my eyes checked…
Well, the first one desperately needs a cheeseburger. I guess that makes them different.
Forgettable ‘cuz inaccessible. The black chick is super sexy ‘cuz I have a thing for black chicks, but I couldn’t pick her out from a sexy black chick lineup.
Then you have Isy Suttie. I wouldn’t call her my heartthrob, but she has a unique look that I like. And there’s not enough Isy Sutties to form a lineup
I don’t know who she is but she looks like the female version of my guy type.
Pre-woke SI Swimsuit Edition.
https://cdn-s3.si.com/s3fs-public/swimsuit/1999/99_vvarekova_01.jpg
I will never forget this picture.
She’s Dobby from Peep Show with David Mitchell and Robert Webb. I link their shit a lot here when I’m not linking Armstrong & Miller clips.
I don’t have a clue what any of that is.
#meneither
Peep Show is great fun. Great awkward, cringy, hatewatch fun.
Peep Show is hilarious. British comedy featuring drugs, profanity, sex, no sex, awkwardness, violence, and disappointment. Dobby is a great character.
Let me get in here that Peep Show seems a pretty good fit for Rhy.
I was raised on 80s PBS. Britcoms are right up my alley.
Same here, Rhy. The POV style in Peep Show sets it apart, somewhat. Pretty innovative, but, difficult to shoot (apparently). It’s been on Hulu in the past, and may be still, if that helps. Can certainly see a lot of it on YT.
@Rhywun – re: Britcoms
Here ya go https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ILgaOb7BW8o
Tom Baker in Swiss Toni.
Rhy, and everyone else, if you haven’t seen Derry Girls yet, you might want to check it out.
Huh. I can’t decide if I’m attracted or not. She has a look that you’d (I’d) expect a certain personality to go with; A personality easy to fall for. If she doesn’t actually have that personality, she goes from a 6.5 to a 5 or 4.
Did that make sense?
Total sense.
I think she’s enchanting.
Appears to have a sense of humor similar to mine. Excellent. This could work out between us…I mean, if my wife is cool with it. And if Isy is cool with it, I guess…
She’s “interesting” looking. I little bit of Regina Spektor, but not quite as attractive to me.
Shoot dang, you’re right. I’d forgotten about her.
I take it back, we’re filling up the Isy Suttie lineup. Kristen Schaal too.
Schaal was the other one I was thinking of. She’s awesome.
She’s got cookies for you in her fanny pack.
She’s so great in that.
I’m more into “interesting” than conventional “pretty”.
So, yeah, my old man (father, you pervs) has a Ph.D. in genetics. Four years, and then a postdoc for two. But he swung a hammer in the eastern Washington winter in between. Mom said no to med school, 12 years was enough.
The statement may have been worded awkwardly, but I can’t see racism or sexism in it.
https://www.baltimoresun.com/entertainment/tv/z-on-tv-blog/bs-fe-zontv-wjz-bubala-babj-20190506-story.html
Also, I dearly love Whitehead’s mind reading.
For Glibs who were alive during the upheavals of the 60’s, were things ever this totalitarian?
There’s no way to wade into this “conversation” without getting accused of something.
“Baltimore City is struggling under the weight of decades of historical divestment, systemic inequality, redlining, and a disconnect between the people in power and those who are being impacted by their decisions,” Whitehead added, saying that she has been discussing the controversy on her WEAA show this week.
Symptoms of a problem. Why did these things happen and what could have been done to change them? Towns across America see the same thing and they become a crossroad with a convenience store and a Dollar General, if they are lucky.
Good luck with that, considering all the land mines you’re not allowed to go near.
I grew up in the 70’s. The only difference I see is that businesses used to avoid politics like the plague. It was not easy to discern what team people (or companies) were on from their public persona.
And by 60’s, you mean 67-75.
So we’ve got at least another 5 years of this to look forward to? Goodie.
Get. A. Life.
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/5-takeaways-from-10-years-of-trump-tax-figures/ar-AAB2BDR
Interesting. Is this publicly-available information, or a “leak” from a “source”?
And The Times did not obtain Mr. Trump’s actual tax returns. But it obtained printouts from his official Internal Revenue Service tax transcripts, with the figures from his federal tax form, the 1040, from someone who had legal access to them.
Unless it was Trump himself or authorized by Trump, sounds like they’re using stolen information.
Yep.
I don’t understand the obsession. A guy with that much money is essentially under permanent audit. If there was anything there to find, the IRS would already have found it. What the fuck are they trying to prove?
“Ooooooo, lookie! DRUMPF doesn’t have as much money as you thought you stupid knuckle-dragging, cousin-fucking, gun-toting, buck-toothed, brainless yokels! He sure put one over on you!”
They have lost their damn minds.
He uses the eevul loopholes…
It’s theater. We need to start hanging these motherfuckers from lampposts. Not saying we should, but we need to.
It is astonishing to me that nobody is going to give a shit that one of the media arms of the DNC is going to publish stolen, private information on an American citizen. Are we going to get his SSN too?
The rules don’t apply because ORANGEMANBAD.
I’m holding out hope for nudes.
https://archive.li/KjarB/c036c8d504ed05dd599c655eb714cdafbee8ba81.jpg
These idiots didn’t learn a thing from the Maddow tax return debacle. Trump points the laser over towards that same rake and they cant step on it fast enough.
Morans.
I have gotten sucked into every one of these. Once I start, I can’t stop reading the snark-laced drivel.
leaving Macy to… completely bite Friendzone’s head off for getting with another girl after she blew him off umpteen times. Friendzone irritably explains the definition of the words “friend zone” to her. She blinks blankly at him until Maggie and BBW return with beers. BBW rubs her scent all over Friendzone and they leave. Macy decrees that he’s not acting like himself—it’s definitely not like him to assert himself and not allow himself to be strung along any further by her. He must be succubused!
I was worried about characters not looking horrible enough in the episode. I should have more faith in the writers.
Mel FINALLY calls Harry. He tackles the demon and eventually manages to stab it in the neck with its own poison.
And at least the incompetence level of our putative heroines is consistent throughout.
Harry tells them they need to be absolutely sure before they do this because the consequences can be extreme. Apparently his existence is due to some kind of similar spell, and because of it, he has no memory of his previous life. All he knows is that he died performing some sort of service of Good that the Elders saw fit to reward by turning him into a Whitelighter.
OW! A brick with piece of paper tied to it just flew threw my window and gave me a concussion. Paper says “HARRY WAS EVIL!!!”
I think I have now read more recaps of woke charmed than I saw episodes of the original.
Maybe not as good as advertised, but certainly better than you think it is.
https://www.breitbart.com/politics/2019/05/06/pete-buttigieg-in-south-carolina-america-was-never-as-great-as-advertised/
TW: Breitbart
Fucking America, trying to pretend it was all great. America has mostly sucked, and that’s why that guy wants to be president. His motto should be “Make America Suck Less”
Yeah. A giant bigoted, racist, dangerous, polluted shithole that billions of people from all around the world are dying to get into.
Such a horrible country that, if he makes it through the primaries, he’ll spend the better part of a billion dollars in an attempt to become the putative leader of it for 4 to 8 years.
That explains why billions of people the world over would love to come here: because their own countries are utopia and the US sucks.
Since when is it politically advantageous for a candidate to proclaim that America stinks? What kind of crazy world did I fall into?
A bit different than what y’all accusing him of saying.
*shrugs*
Like we’re going to click through the links? Bitch, please.
On a (slightly) more serious note, I’ve never loved the “greatest country” formulation – but I’d get behind “least worst” (see also: capitalism).
I think people conflate “greatest” with “flawless”.
I’ll go with “top 10% of countries least likely to imprison or execute you without trial; also you can keep at least some of the money you earn.”
Greatest government is not a high bar to clear (not that I’m complaining).
This. And there’s a lot of mind-reading taking place vis-a-vis “great again“.
Telling Baby Boomers that their imagined childhoods were actually pretty shitty once the nostalgia-goggles are taken off should be supported no matter who the messenger is.
A prophet of Gen-X, they did not listen to him, because apathy hath lain upon them (Mathew 4:23).
What’s your criteria for proclaiming their childhoods to be actually pretty shitty?
You know that orgy you had with the supermodels? It was actually pretty shitty once you take off the nostalgia glasses.
To be fair, it’s not like HM posted it, and I’d wager Q has above-average click-through rate.
It’s Breitbart.
All I need is the headline.
*continues eating paint chips*
No. That guy has been trying to adjust all the facts to comport with his wokeness and it’s getting old. America has always been the greatest country on earth. Christians have actual beliefs that being gay is not cool (not that I share them, but suggesting otherwise is whack.) Being all bitchy is a stupid way to try and gain support, especially when the economy is on fire and things are looking up. Fuck that guy.
https://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/7-masturbation-techniques-to-try.html
wut
*bookmarks*
When I want to know how to masturbate, I always ask someone without a penis.
How do you know what xer equipment is?
^^TRANSPHOBE
isn’t that chaterubate’s whole business model?
I, uh…
…
FFS you just kinda shuffle it around.
You don’t wring it out, like a towel?
You hang yourself just enough until you start getting tunnel vision, then smash it against the door jamb.
Very good, grasshopper.
What you did…it has been seen.
Oh wow. That joke was just in excess of bad taste.
Would you rather I called him a Suicide Blonde?
I just call him Bill.
So I found another bitters – marketed as a “digestif” – at one of my regular supermarkets today… “Underberg”. I dunno… it kind of tastes like Jägermeister to me. It’s not really pairing well with rye IMHO.
Many places ship – e.g., a local place.
Cherry bitters are nice – the Woodford should be fairly widely available.
I like the Owl & Whale bitters – a bit pricier, but bitters last quite a while.
Looks like you can get bitters on Amazon, too – somewhat surprised by that, because of the alcohol.
Drink it fast like a shot, after you eat a meal. Don’t sip it.
Snarf schnitzel, unwrap an Underberg, down the hatch.
Scheiße, I don’t like shots.
Shoot an Underberg and then drink a Guinness. Hold the Underberg in your mouth for about 20 seconds. You’ll thank me.
Enh, some other time. I’m back to Vodka and Fresca for now.
Pictured: Rhywun’s attorney.
More like this guy. His ads call him “Northeast Wisconsin’s DUI guy!” Yeah, other states are pikers when it comes to drinking.
I don’t know WI, other than some guy getting the shit kicked out of him.
But, I do know Texas.
I was expecting Texas Law Hawk.
I’ve lived in the Metroplex for nigh unto 50 year, and I’ve never seen a commercial of his. Not sure he’s run one locally, actually, which he most certainly should (all I get is
JoeJim Adler and his son, now).I think he’s been linked here before, and you were right to expect me to link him.
I’ve let you all down, and will now go hang myself, in accordance with Q’s directives up-thread.
That is some classy web design. Bigly.
It’s attorneys: It’s not like they can afford a lot of ‘production values’ in their web design.
/don’t tell CPRM!
I know, there is a tab to see his commercial, and when I clicked it wanted me to download the ad, did I time travel to 1994?
Fucking Fresca? The ’80s called and want their grapefruit soda back.
C’mon, Spud–Fresca made/makes a nice slush. Then again, that was more 70’s, as I recall.
I’m trying to go late-nite sugar- and caffeine-free and that’s the best candidate vodka mixer yet.
Actually, I liked Fresca in the ’70s.
Has it changed much? I know my wife has bought “flavored” Fresca in the past, but fuck aspartame.
I can only assume it’s better. 70’s meant saccharine and that shit was fucking horrible.
I’d never had it before a couple months ago. For what it is, it’s pretty acceptable. I’d struggled with other options that were all terrible.
Do you like root beer? If so, have I got a low cal one for you that is quite awesome.
I love root beer. If there was a tasty sugar-free variety available in my supermarkets I’d be all over it.
IF….if you can find this
try one, then buy as many as you can.
There is a chain in my area (Central Market) that carries it, and I will clean out their inventory when I go.
(they only sell them individually–can’t find 4-packs, which is how Sprecher sells).
Be careful if you want them and try to buy online. UPS ruined or lost two 24-count orders for me. !&#=@&…
But, like 4% carbs for a 16 oz bottle and no caffeine.
And, trust me: I’ve been searching far and wide for something soda-ish that is low carb/cal and whose sweetener I can stand. This is my jam, now.
Of course, to find even good Root Beer, you gotta go Wisconsin. We really do like things that say beer. Even beer bellies.
Touche’! Sprecher is the bomb for just about everything I’ve had. Which is pretty much cherry cola and root beer.
I don’t even remember if I’ve ever even had one, but growing up in bars I’ve seen the sinage.
Rhy–just a point: they do use saccharine in the lo-call rb. I notice it a bit, but, it hasn’t bothered my as much as aspartame. I think it tends to be less noticeable when I drink one with a meal, so it may not be an issue using one as a mixer (if that is the purpose).
Ugh saccharine is hell on wheels. But I’ll keep an eye out for this or other root-beer possibilities.
They use multiple sweeteners in it. You can fine the label online to see the order of ingredients, and sacch is fairly far down in the list iirc.
That said, if you’re sensitive to it, it may not be what you’re looking for. But, if you can find it around you, try a bottle and see what you think. For a carbonated bev, it is like finding platinum deposits on your property (as I told the wife)–I think it’s that good.
No sensitivity to saccharine – it just tastes horrible.
That’s what I was going for–sensitive to the taste/picking it up easily.
I can smell aspartame in sodas. Had to do it many times in the past when wife and I ordered same brand drinks (Pepsi/diet Pepsi, for example), and the containers are identical. For some reason, my wife can’t taste the difference, which I find stunning.
Oh, I thought you meant allergic or something.
Yeah, aspartame is not ideal – but it’s better than saccharine as far as my taste buds are concerned.
The only thing I dislike about our SodaStream is that every single syrup they make is sweetened with aspartame and, to me, it takes like garbage with poison on top. Anyone have a good ginger ale or ginger beer recipe?
Text message from wife: “I checked your schedule and we will both be in Hachioji at the same time. Isn’t that nice? I went ahead and made us reservations at 12:30 at this cute little Spanish restaurant. See you there..”
This is why I hate modern technology.
I don’t think the problem is with the technology.
Don’t post your schedule where people can see it.
I didn’t. They have some supernatural power.
Japanese people?
Married women. They sense happiness in a husband and must squash it.
Preach it
Call her bluff. Drink WAY too much sangria then piss yourself while singing “I Think I’m Turning Japanese”. She’ll never invite you again.
Thanks Q. You just got me out of every future lunch with my wife.
Oh yeah.
Reschedule the soapland for 3. Either don’t drink too much at lunch, or pop a Viagra right after.
Hrmm… I don’t think Q’s been married.
Wait til she turns on the GPS tracking feature.
Evil is buried in administrative rules. Some of the rules for any transportation plan developed in this state, including by cities or other jurisdictions:
Then there’s all sorts of rules micromanaging bus stops, parking lots, and everything else that struck a legislator’s fancy or was added on by the administrative state.
Ok – even if you believed every single part of the CAGW hoax, why would this be a worthy goal? If you want to reduce the amount of emissions from vehicles, wouldn’t you want an abundance of parking spots so that people can quickly arrive at their destinations and shut off their engines? If you got rid of parking spots, that would cause people to pointlessly drive around the block in circles looking for a place to park.
You and your fucking logic! That won’t save Gaia!
The goal is not to make it convenient, but to make it as inconvenient as possible to use your vehicles, trying to pressure people into abandoning them for the cattle cars.
She has a PHD in Fine Arts.
I’m just gonna go ahead and say it:
–excellent Glibs handle.
https://archive.li/ekd0W/493a5793211223a5fa9777eec1cc0342c49a3eb3.jpg
NSFW.
https://archive.li/MiQvQ/5582f82d6f52457a562ddc7fbe0e4036e25fa173.jpg
NSFW.
*grumble*
I finally got a description of the Imperial Palace and the formal opening of court, now I need the narrator to actually introduce himself to the Emperor and go through the the charade of being an ambassador on a trade delegation.
And I’m not sure how the narrator would open his address to the throne. There is a significant language barrier, so minor errors would get ironed out before they reached the other end.
I suppose I really just need to calm down, fret less and focus on the narrator’s personality.
I didn’t get an e-mail from you not even in my spam folder, so if you sent one it didn’t go through.
“Hey fuckface” is always a good way to start negotiations.
I had not sent it yet. Sorry, I’ve been frazzled for some reason this afternoon/evening.
No prob, just wanted to make sure.
Sent.
Got it.
He’s got hundreds, if not thousands of petitioners to listen to, so the meeting had to be brief.
If you’re going Holy Roman Empire, you need an umlaut on Fürst.
Same for Motorhead.
But his title isn’t pronounced Fürst, it’s pronounced Furst.
It’s the next morning. None of you are First (or Furst)
Look, I posted the excerpt and went to sleep, so I didn’t have a chance to respond
last nightearlier this morning.Attention OMWC and SP:
https://abcnews.go.com/US/porn-deemed-public-health-crisis-arizona-politicians/story?id=62874408
I’ll take “correlation vs. causation” for 500, Alex.
RE: Masturbation techniques.
http://thesmokinggun.com/documents/stupid/baptismal-font-plea-038529
This is not an approved method.
That picture… OMFG.
At least the investigation was thorough.
That’s a great start to adulthood, there, son.
I thought you weren’t an adult until 26 these days,
Maybe that will be part of his defense.
Send it to juvi court!
Why, the nerve of this bitch to try and ruin our narrative!
The absolute lack of light in the souls of these people is astounding.
#believeallwomen
…So she only had to go to the bathroom because she was early? If she was late she wouldn’t have to?
These kinds of details in stories leave me bewildered.
Maybe she wanted to powder her nose. Remember, for ladies, use the bathroom doesn’t always mean “use the bathroom”.
Well, she certainly got ‘used’. Piss on him and the “activists”.
I don’t want to read about your watersports fetish.
“Ignorance is bliss”, eh?
You’re saying she’s a coke addict?
It’s the original drug choice for us wypipo, isn’t it???
Oh, so you ASSUME I’m White, YOU MOTHERFUCKING HONKEY!!???!!!
I presumed my own, so, you’re not off the hook, either.
I don’t miss being called “cracker”.
/America was never that great anyway
Words only have the power you assign them, cracker, honkey and turkey never held any power over me…well no words have, but sadly I’m more stable than 99% of people I guess.
Same here. Actually, they usually make me laugh.
I was a skinny shrimpy gay white kid who went to ghetto schools. Yeah at the end of the day nothing happened but at the time it was occasionally somewhat unpleasant.
Something something …makes you stronger, I guess. I don’t regret anything about my upbringing, at all. These schools were also the best in the county, public or private.
Why Star Trek V is the BEST.
The Wrath of the Hairpiece
Enh, been one. Don’t want to go there.
Oooh, that sounds like an article.
Don’t be one. The End.
I think Charlie Murphy’s celebrity tales of Rick James would be sufficient for our purposes.
Of course, I would definitely read Rhywun’s article, if it existed. Otherwise, his statement stands.
But see, these are things that need to be said, folks like me that never done hard drugs can cry from the rooftops all we want why the things should be legal but stigmatized, and the outcry will forever be, “but you don’t know, because you never did it’
If it wasn’t so recent I would consider an article. And you are right – I am still very much anti-prohibition. But there are still some raw edges and a lot of things I would need to think through before I could even attempt an article.
Understandable.
If she was late, Aunt Flo wouldn’t be visiting. Sheesh.
That’s……ooooh. Gustave for the block.
Because cool things are cool.
Your tautology for the day.
Fire and I don’t mix, it’s all “I want to be your best friend!” and burns my clothes and skin, and then I I have to apply silver oxide. That’s why I don’t do fire anymore. I sleep now.
All hail the Empress of Derpetology. She treads where men fear to go. Defies madness though it brushes against her. We are not worthy of her sacrifice.
(Holy shit that was a funny write up. I really enjoyed it.)
*bows reverently*