Summer was delayed here but has finally begun with a vengeance. I’m sitting in my little office sweating like a kosher pig, the roadrunners are walking, the coyotes aren’t even bothering to chase them, Wonder Dog is looking hurt and betrayed that we moved her furry ass here, and my car is actually sinking into the molten asphalt.

So many great birthdays today! They include include a windy rhymer of whacking off lines; my favorite comedian; my first PhD advisor and a guy who was robbed of a Nobel because of politics; a guy who didn’t get robbed of a Nobel but drives worse than I do; an absolutely brilliant cartoonist; the drunkest quarterback ever; and the woman that SP aspires to be.

On to the news.

 


 

Shit like this is why I have contempt for Trump. Perhaps Smoot and Hawley came to him in a dream. “You can be the next Hoover!” The concept of “free markets” doesn’t get much traction in the Hat and Hair world.

 

A good start, but I’m afraid that it will end there as well.

 

I thought this was The Onion. Nope. There’s no point in even bothering with parody anymore.

 

Always a fun time here in Arizona!

 

Hey, Nikki, you’re so fine! Hey, Nikki! Hey, Nikki! Here’s $200,000 for the night!

 

Gee, Bernie, you’re surprised that a party you don’t want to join doesn’t want you to be their standard-bearer. Huh.

 

Libertarian bum fight.

 

Someone didn’t wrap that rascal. Question: what possible fun is a hickey, anyway? Never understood that.

 

It would be fitting if he had a pork barrel for a coffin. The usual platitudes will flow. Personally, I’d be happy to piss on his grave.

 

Sloopy could have probably gotten double the price.

 

“Because GRE scores are unevenly distributed across race and gender, their use in admissions practices may be filtering underrepresented groups out of physics Ph.D. programs.”  So chucking the exam is the proposed solution. Fuck the Chinese, amiright?

 


 

Old Guy Music, and it’s natural to question why an urban Jew is so fond of jazz and bluegrass. The answer is, fuck you. Oh, and if you don’t like this, you are clearly an inferior human.