SP: Good morning, Mom. Happy Thursday!
MIL: Good morning, honey! What day is it?
SP: Thursday, August 15, 2019.
MIL: Omigahhd! What year is it?
SP: 2019.
MIL: Omigahhd! How old am I?
SP: 86.
MIL: Omigahhd! How did I get so old???!
SP: Would you like a cup of coffee?
MIL: What day is it?
SP: Thursday.
MIL: You know what? Maybe I’d like a cup of coffee.
SP: Coming right up!
MIL: What day is it?
SP: Thursday. Here’s your coffee.
MIL: Oh! I think I’d like a cup of coffee.
SP: Your wish is my command!
MIL: Oh, thank you! You know what, my mind is so blank. What day is it?
SP: Thursday.
MIL: How did I get here? As a matter of fact, I don’t know where “here” is. How long am I staying with you?
SP: You’re in Phoenix, Arizona. You’ve moved here. You walked out barefoot all the way from Florida, and when people would stop by the side of the road and ask if you wanted a ride, you’d say, “No thanks, I need the exercise!”
MIL: *laughing* That doesn’t sound like me. I would have taken the ride!
MIL: What day is it?
Oof. That’s funny until you reenact it 20 days in a row. SP, you’re a good person.
Not really. She’s a lovely person. It’s easy to be kind to her.
It’s easy to get frustrated, even at nice people. Hopefully she has more lucid days than confused ones ahead of her. I’ve seen enough family members go through that to not wish it on even my worst enemy.
I am so sorry that she is suffering. Having your body fall apart is one thing, your mind another altogether.
YOUR MIND ANOTHER
Good Morning SP!
And all you knuckleheads out there…
How’s the arm Yusef? or do I have the wrong clipped winger?
Good morning Yusef.
Now these are true morning links. ::sips coffee at home::
SP, You have my sympathy, you are an angel dressed in street clothes.
My worst fear but of course your MIL is a passive participant. OMWC is a lucky guy but I know its tough on him too.
Every morning I look in the mirror, smile and say to myself, “God damn, its good to see you”. We’re almost the same age as your MIL and today I picking beets, Mrs Fourscore is ready to make pickles.
The ride is long and sometimes gets bumpy. Keep doing what you’re doing, all the rest of the glibs with elderly parents can learn a lot from your experiences. Thanks
You just made me want some beets. And pickles.
Unfortunately it is drought season here. It is hot as hell, humid and being on the edge of hills we haven’t had a drop of rain in 4 weeks. I can run the hoses day and night and it just isn’t enough. My garden crapped out.
I opened up a new garden space this year, I had planted trees around my old garden, forgetting that they grow (tall) and block the sun. Anyway, with beach sand soil, water, a little 10-10-10 and the sunshine my garden is doing well. The cold spring set back everything a few weeks but looks like most will catch up. I need another month frost free.
The only way I like beets is pickled.
I planted about 100 oaks and pecans. They all sprouted and got up about a foot tall. Now the drought has killed them all.
Yikes!
Dang… that sucks man.
Sorry to hear that Suthen’. That is dejecting.
It’s been very dry here, too. Contributing to our bumper
broccoligrasshopper crop.How to cook grasshoppers:
https://www.wikihow.com/Cook-Grasshoppers
Step 1 – Get flamethrower.
Step 2 – aim for dense part of locust swarm.
Sage advidce
Hmm, I suppose sage would probably go with grasshopper.
Grasshopper tempura with sage and garlic?
I know the story, Suthen, one year I planted 500 Norway (red) pine seedlings, I think about 8-10 of them survived. Another time was a wild life package, 50 X 10 different trees, 25-30 white pine made it, no oak/maple/wild cherry. Spring time drought here sometimes. I have water in the garden now, for those dry spells.
I’d like to subscribe to your newsletter, Fourscore!
Mmmmmm fresh beets.
So the the guy is too stupid to execute, but stupid enough to kill…… ok
I never got that either.
And you aren’t going to. Remember that guy Forest….something or other? Stupid is as stupid does. So is crazy.
No, what I don’t get is why it’s okay to execute man-killing animals who acted on instinct, okay to execute humans who knew what they were doing, but somehow not okay to execute a human who falls into an arbitrary range of intellect between the two.
Not as many Downs syndrome survivors 100 years ago either IYKWIM
It is not ok. It is necessary. It’s not ok at all.
Not executing those who fall into an arbitrary range of intellect between the two is our feeble attempt to bring something akin to our idea of right into the world. It’s a shitty world. We didn’t make the rules we are just trying to live within their bounds.
^Well put.
I’ve known some really bad hombres that were deficient. For me the trouble is what probably made them that way. Some of these guys had been institutionalized since birth.
Same as with torture. There are some people that deserve to sit through an Amy Shumer special with their eyes pried open ala Clockwork Orange, but you just don’t do it.
Not even when you get off on people being tortured by fat ugly chicks?
Read in the Nipponese papers (sorry, but why link it?) that the guy who torched the anime studios last month is getting extensive skin graphs because of all the burn he received. I’m against state executions, but at least don’t waste taxpayer money on a dirtbag like that.
fixing him up to be hanged?
Yep. If there were a shadow of a doubt that the guy did it, I’d understand. Not in this case.
Maybe they’re letting trainee plastic surgeons work on him so they can get some experience on a customer it’s ok if they make a few mistakes on?
Burn unit 731?
I dunno, that in and of itself could be a fate worse than death. Third-degree burns requiring large-scale skin grafts are an agony beyond belief. Perhaps keeping him alive is poetic justice.
Read in the Nipponese papers (sorry, but why link it?)
Can’t, like, half the glibertariat read Japanese?
No.
As far as I know two are fluent, not sure how fully fluent Raphael is. There are two active students including me. There are a few others that have studied in the past and have an interest.
Don’t the Japanese still have capital punishment? Maybe they’re just trying to make the arsonist look presentable for his execution. Although, seriously, you can’t put someone on trial while they still need to be in the hospital, as the accused should be able to face their accusers, so it makes sense to try to heal up a suspected criminal as soon as possible so that the justice system can get moving.
>>Rep. Steve King shocked across party lines Wednesday when he mused during a speech whether humanity would exist if it were not for rape and incest throughout history.
I won’t go defending rape and incest – yuck! – but Nature (with a big N) doesn’t care where the seed came from. I’m sure it increased genetic diversity, blah blah blah.
also STEVE SMITH joke
Just don’t tell the women folk, they get funny ya know,
Some things, while true, ought not to be said in polite company. Especially when they are at best tangential to the discussion at hand. But yes, everybody alive is a result of incest somewhere along their family tree, depending on how broadly you define it (everyone has at least cousin-cousin action in their lineage).
I just saw this advertised on TV.
https://www.amazon.com/Chia-Decorative-Pottery-Planter-Occasion/dp/B01G988ZRG
Yep. That exists.
Just cover it in orange peel, winner!
That is awesome, but I still think this one is the best one.
Awesome.
They’ve been doing the political heads for a while now. I do have to laugh that the Hillary one is half the price of all the others. I think that’s evidence of a war on women.
It’s nice that you have a choice of “Laughing At You” Obama or “Smug Prick” Obama.
Somewhere out there is someone who’s bought both, and mounted them on his wall like the theater tragedy/comedy masks.
With a slew of “woke” books in the middle?
This is trending on a certain segment of Twitter:
https://milliondollarextreme.com/collections/frontpage/products/epstein-shirt-black
Obama’s bathtub?
Now I want one just to mess with Wifey!
I wonder how the hair feels seeing that! and I hope SF is reading this.
So I finally watched Noah.
I have to admit that I’m amused by it. It was blatantly Gnostic/Kabbalah, yet Aronofsky managed to get all sorts of Christian leaders to pimp the movie when it was released. I have to wonder if he was trying to show that the emperor has no clothes or if it was an actual expression of his belief system.
Oh, and Emma Watson, pretty to look at, but she can’t act for shit.
That’s like 98% of Hollywood. Good looking people who can memorize lines.
But those memorized lines give them deep insight into the human conditions. Right?
She can act, but Noah lacks emotional direction. Aronofsky has done that before (eg. Mother, The Fountain).
*sigh*
The decommissioning process for servers was setup to make sure every piece of a system is accounted for and dealt with when it is no longer needed. And so, to remove a server from the ticketing system requires a decommissioning request that triggers the whole process.
The problem is some putz included in the initial data load to the first version of the ticking system servers that don’t exist (they were never migrated to the consolidated datacenter because they only existed to support the infrastructure in the agency datacenter). Of course, that putz can’t possibly be expected to be the one to fix the problem. So I have to put in the decommissioning request since they’re listed as “my” servers, and a half dozen other units have to check to see that no, this server that doesn’t exist doesn’t have something they need to delete before someone fianlly takes it out of the ticketing system.
I get to deal with that from the other side. The client decommissioning servers without letting us know. So in the middle of the night a half dozen alerts and alarms get generated, as we try to find out what the hell is going on, only to be told that the server was part of a planned decommission.
I’m just watching these ticket update notices from the backup guy as he goes through and reports that none of these servers are being backed up (since they don’t exist) and keep thinking about how much uneccesary effort the putz’s original mistake created.
The gift that keeps on giving.
It’s almost as much fun as diving into something designed by an implementation team who didn’t give a shit about maintaining or making changes after the go live.
I used to have to deal with from yet another side – looking at IT’s depreciation schedule and trying to figure out which on the servers on it were still actually be used before the Auditors did. I found a bunch still in a building we sold off to Aetna a couple of years earlier.
Don’t you love incomplete building exits? I’ve disconnected dozens and dozens of circuits to offices that were gone 20 years ago. Oops.
Now that’s funny.
No one at Aetna questioned why there were running computers in their building before they moved in?
I believe that the computers were part of their acquisition of Prudential’s Group Healthcare – so they belonged to Aetna. Which means Prudential shouldn’t have them on their own balance sheet / depreciation schedule 3 years later.
ohn Hickenlooper will drop out of the Democratic presidential primary on Thursday
Who?
Funny-named white dude #3
Shame. I so wanted a Buttgieg/Hickenlooper 2020 ticket.
Motorist Was Playing Pokémon Go On Eight Phones Simultaneously
“However, during the course of the incident one of the Officers was charged by Pikachu and Charmander. Fearing for his safety, the Officers’ Poke Ball discharged, and the Pokemons were defeated. No other Pokemon, the driver, or the Officers were injured.”
I live near one of the nations highest density of poke-stops. These people are real. I saw one guy who was, I think (I pray), cosplaying as GTO driving up and down the road, stopping at every pokestop for maybe three hours.
for all the Bob Dylan fans ::crickets::
Ian Noe has a similar vibe but a less nasally voice
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7zQZ1IicM6Y
*insert deity* help us
The new poll shows Warren with 20 percent support among likely Democratic primary and caucus voters. Although Biden is polling at 21 percent, his lead over Warren has all but disappeared and is well within the poll’s 2.6 percent margin of error. Senator Bernie Sanders (I-VT) remains in third place and is polling at 16 percent.
According to the poll, 22 percent of likely voters also say that they would be “disappointed” if Biden became the Democratic Party’s presidential nominee. Only 9 percent of likely voters indicated the same about Warren.
Some people, however, remain skeptical that Warren can win the presidency, as 44 percent of respondents indicated that they believe Warren would “probably lose” in an election against Trump. Furthermore, only 28 percent indicated that they believe Warren could beat Trump.
Running Warren would be like Hillary 2.0
Dude! Ixnay on the Indian nicknames for her.
Sanjay?
[golf clap]
Also, I miss Injun.
Worse. Much, much worse. I still think a savior will arise and all of this is merely a preamble to the anointment of the Chosen One.
Hillary
The Wookie
Yuck squared.
Except she can’t even pretend to be likable and falls apart when put on the spot. So I guess it would be even more entertaining.
Only one poll shows her closing the gap, but it could be good news for Republicans. Trump fares much better against Warren has to head,
*head to head
Another poll just came out.
Biden’s average lead back up to 13 points.
https://www.realclearpolitics.com/epolls/2020/president/us/2020_democratic_presidential_nomination-6730.html
Maybe I’m just extra emotional today, but your story really got me. The end really made me verklempt.
*tries to shake it off and shitlord harder*
Good morning, SP.
…and all the rest of you people.
YOU PEOPLE?!!??!
::triggered::
Ahh…there we go. Now I feel better.
It’s the finger…need to change to the shocker.
Awww. Need a tampon ?
Pads different than ‘pons.
“If your bum is leakin’, ya need to be seekin’….ROCA pads”
I love that bit
You’re safe. HM isn’t here to give you the “My name is gay” dog gif.
DOH!
As if I’d care if the dog told me he was gay or not.
So you don’t care about consent?
Woof.
Woof means woof!
Bow Wow yelp means SPOT SMITH
How ‘bridezilla’ became this summer’s biggest sexist slur
When grooms start exibiting such behaviour, we’ll come up with a derogatory term for them too.
But being a nightmare bitch is vastly different from being ‘assertive’. If you can’t tell the difference, you need to go back to kindergarten and start over learning to human.
who are you and what have you done with UCS?
It’s a bug with patch 190815a
It will be fixed by the next update.
That’s a lot of words for someone who is obviously confused about the definition of “bridezilla”.
Oh, she is not confused at all about it: she is trying to subvert reality and in the process shame the people that she dislikes for holding a belief that harshes her narrative.
Weirdest bride moment: I went to the wedding of a co-worker’s daughter. At the reception, she was going table to table with her new husband. They stop by my table, where I’m sitting with some people from work. The bride is obviously drunk off of her ass, and is standing behind me, talking to everyone but also running a hand up and down my back. Awkward!
You and I – separated at birth? Had the same thing happen three times.
She was just horned up on wedding vibes. Doubt it means anything.
“Horned up on wedding vibes” should become a “thing”!
She doesn’t know Reality Shows are not Reality? She’s an editor of a book on “Media” and doesn’t realize the shows are scripted? And they’re fun to watch.
Maybe she does know, but JFC
Virtue signaling is a though task.
It ain’t men who are watching that tripe.
Add in the Real Housewives trend as well.
Put all of those home improvement shows in the blender and you’ve got yourself a shit smoothy, Brother.
If you claim to be a researcher of communication, and you only ran into the word Bridezills in 2004, you are a shitty researcher.
>associate professor of communication at Southern Oregon University
Oh I see.
What fucking dimension does this person live in?!
mornin’
“1717 Blind Jack [John Metcalf], English 1st professional roadbuilder, born in Knaresborough, Yorkshire, England (d. 1810)”
Professional roadbuilder? So a Nazi then? Everyone knows the government builds the roads, not professionals.
Huh. I thought the layout of English roads came from them being paved pedestrian and sheep paths. I had no idea it’s because they were built by a blind guy.
Why do you think they have so many circles in them?
Video of UCS’s last trip to England.
Yeah, look at the picture of that traffic circle and tell me that’s not a Python skit gone wrong.
I’ve got to say that the roundabouts up here work vastly better than the traffic circles in England did. Probably because the English keep driving through them backwards.
Take a trip down Fuller Road sometime, particularly between CNSE and I-90/Washington Ave
For the full effect, start at Railroad Ave and drive to CNSE, you’ll meet three of the most pointless roundabouts ever put to pavement.
I really like roundabouts. If people know how to use them, you can go through them at speed.
This, however, is a dump roundabout – if you add traffic signals to a roundabout, you have the worst of all worlds.
er, ‘dumb’
Someone must’ve pissed in our IT department’s cheerios. Every single link except birthdays is blocked by our system admin… 🙁
I’m sorry to hear that.
At least you can get to Glibs still.
*Website blocked*
And Cy was never seen again…
…during work hours.
Damn… AP News is blocked? That reminds me of when IT installed a new web filtering software at my last company. They installed the software at the end of February, and went overboard on what categories were blocked. The one that pissed off the managers the most? The Sports category was blocked.
*Overhears the suits talk around the office*
Yup, that would be the key category to get the ire of middle to upper management.
The real fun was that they were talking up this software and trying to sell the regular workers on it. Off the top of my head, on top of the standard blocked items (adult, spam, etc) they blocked e-mail, games, sports, and social media. The managers didn’t start bitching about it until they tried to get to their March Madness sites. That’s what caused the shitstorm.
and yet, at my company of 9k people, nary a block to be seen (aside from straight-up malware sites). They just trust us to be responsible adults.
Amazing.
(I suspect I’ll be disappointed if & when I leave this job and go elsewhere).
the worst is when it department guys don’t have the same rules for themselves and access things that are blocked to others
At my job we have a super secret wireless connection so we can stream audio. It’s good for Spotify, Youtube, Pandora, etc for us headphone listeners.
Isn’t that everywhere?
That was the perk of managing the proxy.
Hey, now…
That’s SOP here. People were hired in different ‘phases’, each different phase has had wildly different restrictions or lack of. It’s funny watching some of the newer employees fire up youtube like it’s no big deal… I no about 80% of our work force have to proxy4 into youtube (thank you DUCKDUCK!)
That’s odd.
Our proxy rules are applied by what group your account is in, which is based upon job/unit/role requirements. I can’t think of any reason why someone would go to the added trouble of creating new control lists for new phases rather than just update the ruleset for everyone.
“You get incremental punishment for your loyalty.”
Gee, thanks.
Been there at the old job. Current one keeps me too busy…
“1785 Thomas De Quincey, English writer (Confessions of English Opium Eater), born in Manchester (d. 1859)”
Someone who knew how to party on their birthday.
If he was eating it then he was doing it wrong.
Meh. It’s ingestible. Smoking gives you a quicker high. Not sure which is more efficient in terms of releasing maximum amount of active ingredient. Like pot cookies vs bong hits.
Heck, I wouldn’t know. Opioids make me skritchy and are to be avoided at all costs. I had to fly home from Calgary after surgery and the nurse doped me up pretty good just before I left. It was like being bitten by thousands of mosquitos for the duration. Never again.
In the future if you need to take opioids, take a Benadryl first.
Right? Everybody knows you’re supposed to keister pain meds.
I haven’t read that book yet – is it any good?
It’s a little Poppy.
Words have consequences
“This morning I placed an ad on Fox & Friends in Bedminster, [New Jersey] to send a message to [Trump] on his vacation,” Castro wrote in a tweet. “Words have consequences and we’ve had enough.”
“President Trump, you referred to countries as ‘s**tholes.’ You urged American congresswomen to go back to where they came from. You called immigrants rapists,” Castro says in the ad. “As we saw in El Paso, Americans were killed because you stoked the fire of racists. Innocent people were shot down because they look different from you, because they look like me. They look like my family.”
“Words have consequences. Ya basta,” he added, using the Spanish slang for “enough.”
And absolutely none of that is based on things taken far out of context. Now, since we have established that words have consequences, I wonder how that relates to constantly and incorrectly demonizing the current president and anyone who supports him as deplorable, racist, misogynist, fascist, nazis, etc.
I thought it was elections that had consequences.
some countries _are_ shitholes.
That guy is an embarrassment.
Turd flinging. Why would anyone even engage with that?
The DRMFNWCLKW community?
The Dwarf Relocating, Mother F****ing, new world cum licking karaoke workers?
Nailed it.
“Castro says, without evidence, that Sergio Martinez Mendoza was wrongfully convicted.”
I wonder why people are literally taking pot-shots at ICE offices, Julian?
“constantly and incorrectly demonizing the current president and anyone who supports him”
^This.
It really is amazing that they can’t understand why people would hate them more than Trump.
Words matters. Context not so much.
Castro is the real asshole here.
“President Trump, you referred to countries as ‘s**tholes.’ ”
Pretty sure that has always been disputed.
You know. If Politifact was truly an impartial fact checking organizing out to find the truth and save democracy, they’d fact check every single one of those claims and put an end to this nonsense and Castro’s disingenuous assertions.
But nope.
Though lacking in factual support, Castro’s claims are bolstered by Donald Trump’s being a meany faced doodoo head. We rate this ad Mostly True.
If the El Paso shooting is 100% caused by Trump’s words, was the Republican softball game shooting also caused by the vitriol spewed against Trump by Lefties?
Hah hah, no, of course not. That was just a lone wacko, and had nothing to do with politics, other than to prove we definitely need to take everybody’s guns away.
also telling that akira should apparently tend to interpret obvious good sense as vitriol.
Thot Thursday has details on Pizzagate.
https://tinyurl.com/y3olzq9k
Ann Coulter says Trump ‘deserves to lose,’ will vote for him anyway
“the Cato Institute as ‘fake phony frauds.'”
Broken clock.
Too much Reason?
Riiiiight. She’ll stop writing books for about as long as Blaire White swore off social media for good.
“Blaire White swore off social media for good”
When did that happen?
For about a day when she got doxxed by our homegrown tampon-sniffer.
“Gonna take a break from the internet for a while” is not swearing off social media for good.
Crap. I don’t want to agree with the scarecrow.
Blind squirrel, acorn…
“Libertarians are p—–s.”
Pawns?
Psychos?
Better that than pussies…
Apt
authored 13 New York Times bestsellers
People really will buy anything.
*checks own sales report*
Liar.
Nothing to see here.
https://www.lmtonline.com/news/article/Autopsy-finds-broken-bones-in-Epstein-s-neck-14305473.php
Meh. The Joker did that to frame Batman, so it’s completely plausible that Eppy did that himself.
Hyoid fracture doesn’t indicate one way or another. If there were spinal fractures, that would be another matter.
Well, it did say multiple breaks *including* the hyoid.
I’m not jumping to conclusions that they meant spinal fractures as well.
He killed himself, but murder is within the realm of possibility so I wouldn’t blame anyone for thinking that.
I have reasonable doubt. I’m waiting on more information before declaring.
Talked with my brother today and he was going on about all the “evidence” that supports the idea that Epstein was murdered. “Maybe all this conspiracy stuff is detracting from the bigger picture that government is incompetent. You don’t need Hillary sneaking into his cell to prove that.” He reluctantly agreed and then went on with other data points that supported his theory.
It is quite possible that some fellow inmates “helped” him hang himself. Will be interesting to see what the ME concludes.
That ME will conclude that it is “suicide” if he knows what’s best for him…
/some Clinton
George has lost his mellow…
I don’t think the Clintons even care anymore. They want people to know they’ll kill a squealer. It’s not like any investigation will ever gt back to them.
From the original link:
I know most criminals are dumb, but in the current honor system, all Epstein has to do is be clever enough to say “you know, I changed my mind about the whole suicide thing”.
But was he able to get his full body weight? Would that be required? Idk how you’d get your full weight if you tie to a bedpost and lean forward.
“Give me a large enough lever and I can move the world”.
Asphyxiation and a broken neck are two different things. Even if he had some broken vertebrae, I’d suspect he simply caused himself to stop breathing.
Or someone did…
Sitting at the airport in Spud land waiting to fly home after inspecting a lift at the fairgrounds. Should have taken four hours but they weren’t ready so it took ten.
Skyride
Why is that called “The Skyride”? I think my toes would be dragging.
Marketing? I didn’t name, I just designed it.
At least tell us that you spit on the fair-goers from atop your perch.
No riders until tomorrow. For some reason they want the inspections done before opening.
So THAT’S why they don’t let me go to the fair no more.
P___ _s
Diabetic Man Dies from taco eating contest at minor league baseball game. I’m sorry I laughed.
https://abc30.com/man-dies-after-taco-eating-contest-at-fresno-grizzlies-game/5467417/
Stupid is as stupid does.
at least he died doing what he loved…
I wanna die eating tacos.
tired of sushi?
Fish tacos, sushi, roast beef flaps… All good.
What (I think…) you did there…it is noted. And my gaze is narrowed. But I approve.
Maybe he had Prader-Willi Syndrome? Had a client thus afflicted and the lengths that guy would go to in order to scratch his itch was amazing. Aside from his condition he was perfectly able to function in the real world but get him within twenty feet of a cigarette butt and it was bedlam. He was of at least average intelligence and crafty as fuck. Used to escape from his minders regularly. I always felt sorry for the dude, made to live in a group home because of his urges.
STEVE SMITH SAY RAPE!
“Jeffrey Epstein had broken neck bones that can be caused by STRANGULATION, autopsy reveals – as it is also revealed he blamed cellmate for wounds from first ‘suicide’ attempt
Jeffrey Epstein had broken bones in his neck and suffered injuries commonly linked to hanging OR strangulation, autopsy reveals – as billionaire’s mystery ‘associate’ claims the body”
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7359111/Autopsy-finds-Jeffrey-Epstein-broken-bones-neck-raising-questions-suicide.html
It looks like his cellmate could get steroids in prison.
Send them back?
https://www.breakingisraelnews.com/135406/netanyahu-blocks-ilhan-omar-rashida-tlaib-from-entering-israel/
Wouldn’t they prefer to visit Palestine?
That shithole? No, they’s rather be in a first world nation thye can denigrate rather than suffer the accomodations of a 4th world cess pit.
It’s safer to land in Tel Aviv.
Go to Palestine and you’re liable to end up in Uganda.
I can’t wait for the checkmarks to goysplain antisemitism to Israelis.
Gaffe machine? Or just Biden his time?
“Those kids in Parkland came up to see me when I was vice president.” — Biden, Aug. 10, 2019. The Parkland shooting was a year after Biden left office.
“We choose unity over division. We choose science over fiction. We choose truth over facts.” — Biden, Aug. 8, 2019.
“Poor kids are just as bright and just as talented as white kids.” — Biden, Aug. 8, 2019.
“(Mitt) Romney wants to let the — he said in the first hundred days he’s going to let the big banks once again write their own rules, unchain Wall Street. They’re gonna put y’all back in chains.” — Biden, Aug. 14, 2012, before a largely black Virginia audience.
“Margaret Thatcher, um, excuse me, Margaret Thatcher — Freudian slip. … But I knew her, too. … The prime minister of Great Britain, Theresa May.” — Biden, May 4, 2019, at a fundraiser. Thatcher left office in 1990.
“When the stock market crashed, Franklin D. Roosevelt got on the television and didn’t just talk about the, you know, the princes of greed.” — Biden, 2008, in a CBS interview. Television had not yet been invented in 1929, and Roosevelt was not yet president.
“This election year, the choice is clear. One man stands ready to deliver change we desperately need. A man I’m proud to call my friend. A man who will be the next president of the United States. Barack America!” — Biden, Aug. 23, 2008, at an Illinois campaign rally.
“I mean, you’ve got the first sort of mainstream African American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy. I mean, that’s a storybook, man.” — Biden, Jan. 31, 2007, in a conference call with reporters.
“You cannot go to a 7-Eleven or a Dunkin’ Donuts unless you have a slight Indian accent. I’m not joking.” — Biden, June 17, 2006, to a voter referring to the growing number of people from India living in Delaware.
It’s amazing the three traits that seriously would put trump in trouble are articulate not belligerent, have policy knowledge and not old. are the three things that the most probable nominee does not possess.
Someone pointed out that these are not “gaffes,” they’re obviously/probably cognitive malfunction.
Also, the word “gaffe” is only used in “journalism.” Nobody in your daily life ever uses the word gaffe
Nope. “Senility” and “Dementia” are how you describe it in real life.
He’s always been like this. Probably not senility.
Well… he was never a smart man. Now that he’s ancient and losing it, it’s a much shorter descent into senility.
“‘It’s set on a Volkswagen chassis with big ol’ wide weenies – big wide tyres on mag wheels, Corvair engine stuffed in the back. It’s very light, you know (because of the fiberglass body). It’s pulling about 230 horses and weighs about a thousand pounds.'”
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/money/cars/article-7356969/Steve-McQueen-dune-buggy-Thomas-Crown-Affair-sold-auction.html
This was Steve McQueen’s coolest car.
I thought you’d go with the ’68 Mustang.
If you’re going to have a very light chassis with a big engine, wouldn’t you want to move the engine as close to the center of the wheelbase as possible for stability?
*clicks link*
How did that engine not keep getting hit on the ground?
It’s a movie car. Most dune buggies had VW flat-four engines that were way smaller.
Proving that “reproductive rights” is yet another example of women wanting special privileges free from responsibility rather than equal treatment under the law.
https://www.thesun.co.uk/fabulous/9716145/spurglars-women-baby-hoodwinked-pregnant/
If you haven’t already gotten a vasectomy, make an appointment today.
They don’t need husbands, they’ve got government.
why do these people want their picture in the papers?
Because they’re narcissists.
I feel for the kids, they’re screwed.
That must be a fake news site – I’ve been assured that all men have total control at all times and women never have a say in any situation whatsoever.
A Guide to Sex Toys That Don’t Totally Ruin the Planet
without a single honey bee to save us
STFU ABOUT COLONY COLLAPSE DISORDER!!!
Such manufactured, mendacious chicken little bullshit.
https://www.agprofessional.com/article/bee-population-rising-around-world
Not the bees!!!!!!!!!!!!
“A transgender woman was handcuffed ‘like a criminal’ after a shopping mall cleaner stopped her from using the ladies’ toilets.
Gretchen Custodio Diez, 28, was about to enter the restroom in the Quezon City area of Manila, the Philippines, when a female cleaner, Chair Ganal, is said to have blocked her path and refused to let her use them on August 13.
Gretchen, wearing a jacket and black dress, filmed the incident in the Quezon City area of Manila, the Philippines.
The worker is heard arguing with Gretchen, telling her ‘You still have a penis, remember that’.
The cleaner, then allegedly took her down to the basement and held her inside a room isolated from other shoppers.
She was also caught on film repeatedly trying to take the phone while appearing to hit her.”
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7360029/Transgender-woman-handcuffed-like-criminal-cleaner-stopped-using-ladies-toilets.html
this is what north carolina wants!!!!!
‘You still have a penis, remember that’.”
Now that’s a slogan!
*Bugs Bunny Ovation*
That’s not a chick with a dick: that’s a dude with tits!
“Cuidado: Custodian catches Custodio”
so kitchen counter are clean… just the damn bathrooms left…
There’s a joke in here somewhere….
Or a crime scene.
Don’t forget about the fruit at the bottom of the bowl.
Since Swiss is on the shitter still, feel free to pun away.
But not getting the narrowed runs afoul of tradition.
We will plunge into anarchy without his narrowed gaze here to stop us up.
My friend has male pornographic photos all over his flat
How’s he gonna be able to fap on demand without those?
I think the “persuasion” swings the other way. His friend probably hangs them up when his friend comes a-callin’.
Or… “Hint, hint.”
Never miss an opportunity to gallop around in front of the cameras on your hobbyhorse
The Philadelphia mayor called out the NRA and demanded a resolution to the nation’s gun crisis, saying officers need help keeping numerous weapons out of criminals’ hands.
“Our officers deserve to be protected and they don’t deserve to be shot at by a guy for hours with an unlimited supply of weapons and an unlimited supply of bullets. It’s disgusting and we got to do something about it … quickly,” the mayor said. “This government, both on federal and state level, don’t want to do anything about getting these guns off the streets and getting them out of the hands of criminals.”
Gunfire, hours-long standoff in Philadelphia after “police officers tried to serve a narcotics warrant”.
I wonder if they knocked.
Whatever happened to a good old-fashioned firebombing to drive them out?
+1 incentive to MOVE.
You have already “done” everything short of going house-to-house disarming everyone. Put up or shut up.
I don’t think he and d.a. Krasner would sanction “stop and frisk” policies. And don’t forget that rapper Meek Mill, who apparently waved a gun around in front of a cop and lived to tell about it, is now a Philly hero because he refused to follow parole procedures.
getting these guns off the streets and getting them out of the hands of criminals
Off the streets AND out of the hands of criminals?
Guns need a good home with owners who’ll take good care of them, take them to the range regularly, clean up after them, and not commit random drive-bys.
Woo hoo! Got into the club that does IDPA training. Unfortunately, all the new member rigmarole won’t start until Sep 21.
Congrats. I need to get out to the range sometime. Recently found 100 rounds of unfired .22lr while cleaning up.
Ever since I got extra magazines for the Mark IV, I go through .22 at an exorbitant rate.
https://www.eabco.com/ClipLoader.htm
Are you aware this exists?
Narcotics warrant?
Just think if you ended the drug war how many police officer lives could be saved.
We need common sense gun safety laws that prohibit felons from buying firearms!!!!
Oh, wait….
We can tell SP puts thought into the links. Others could learn from you.
Link-Shamer!
You get what you get!
https://babylonbee.com/news/new-legislation-targeting-violent-gun-wielding-groups-accidentally-bans-government
HA!
*tries to make joke about being a gun welder*
That would be tack-y.
This is democracy! We are the government so we should all be able to world weapons of war. As soon as you start arguing for disarmament you are no longer advocating democratic or republican ideals.
BB is on point.
The Last of the Ayn Rand Acolytes
Anybody who self describes as an acolyte is a neckbearded incel.
That or an eromenos.
real-life version of Randian corporate overlordship – huh ?
austerity-battered America – huh?
Rand’s hyper-capitalist philosophy—which has influenced some of the most powerful political and economic giants of recent history – huh?
Believing that requires such an immense capacity for cognitive dissonance that I’m not sure how someone could mentally function in the real world.
Well it is the New Republic, which is about as insightful as watching lichen grown. But at least lichen serves a purpose.
We’re so austere we only spend ourselves into a Trillion dollars worth of more debt each year.
Huh… I didn’t even know this happened here in Cleveland.
“Like Baltimore?”
“THAT’S DIFFERENT!”
“A singer has filed an anonymous lawsuit claiming that she was repeatedly sexually assaulted by a producer, starting at the age of 14.
The lawsuit does not name either the alleged perpetrator or the woman but does describe that she had signed a seven-album deal after recording her debut in 2005.”
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7358389/Anonymous-singer-files-lawsuit-claiming-sexually-assaulted-teenager-producer.html
IANAL, but how is that possible?
seen in sidebar: Nick Nolte, 78, wears pink from head to toe while enjoying a bike ride in Malibu
He looks totally out of it.
also thicc?
Farrah Abraham leaves little to the imagination in VERY skimpy leopard print bikini as she heads to the pool… after getting butt injections
Hawt
Am I the only one who keeps getting him and Gary Busey confused?
No
No. Literally everyone does that.
thicc ?
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-7359597/Pixie-Lott-sizzles-swimsuit-shes-17-scenic-Greek-getaway.html
how about?
Sofia Richie displays her hourglass curves in a thong bikini as she soaks up the sun on Kylie Jenner’s superyacht in the South of France
I remember Pixie lott from some old music video with Rowan Atkinson in which she looked very wouladable. Sofia Ritchi I would also not kick out of bed
Had a friend who worked in New York hotels were actors/singers/etc, would stay. He would get room service orders from Nolte along the lines of: Bottle of Jack Daniels, 2 packs Marlboro Reds, and a spinach salad.
GODDAMMIT REGGIE!!!
“That’s some damn fine reporting there, Lou!”
I bet you it is Justin Bieber.
Taylor Swift was born in 1989. She would’ve been 14 in 2005. Her debut was released in 2006.
Oh noes! Orville Redenbacker is ending his 2020 bid! Who will be President of popcorns?
Unfortunately, by 2016, the world was producing 44.7 million metric tonnes of electronic waste, only 20 percent of which was recycled through appropriate channels. In addition, toys made with plastic are produced from petroleum and have a recycling path thwarted with difficulty. Sex toys made out of jelly rubber, meanwhile, often contain phthalates, which have been found to have a toxic impact on aquatic environments, causing long-term adverse affects on the ecosystem.
Save the planet- masturbate with our hand carved ivory dildos, in a variety of styles and sizes.
But the elephants?!
Eggs omlett
They only use ivory from male tusks. Smash the patriarchy!
This was Steve McQueen’s coolest car.
Nice. But the C-type was Jaguar’s most beautiful car.
The front end looks a little goofy.
truth
Actual morning dialog:
Mom: Oy, my mind is a blank. Where am I?
Me: You’re in Phoenix, Arizona.
Mom: What am I doing here?
Me: You live here, with SP and me. And Wonder Dog.
Mom: How long have I been here?
Me: About a month.
Mom: I’ve been here a MONTH? I can’t remember any of that. How did I get here?
Me: (My sister) brought you out on an airplane.
Mom: Where am I?
Me: You’re in Phoenix, Arizona with SP and me. And the Wonder Dog.
Mom: Do I have my clothes here? My mind is such a blank. It’s really strange.
Me (trying not to cry): Yes, Mom, your clothes are here.
Mom: Where am I?
The thought of being in constant confusion about my current surroundings horrifies me. The possibility terrifies me too. I’m not sure I’d be able to handle looking after someone else going through that either.
I’m sorry you have to go through this OWMC. My family doesn’t have a history of it, just of dying either young (40’s – 50’s) or old (90+). My parents are still with us, and finally (in their 70’s) thinking about selling the house they’ve owned together for over 40 years.
Sorry man. That’s not easy to deal with. My condolences.
More people should ask themselves “Where am I”? We might all be suffering from something.
Have you ever throught that maybe, we just don’t want to know?
So, where are you?
-_-
…
A 6×6 cubicle in a farm of 6×6 cubicles in the second worst city in the people’s democratic republic of new york.
Rochester? Syracuse? Poughkeepsie? Newburgh? Cohoes? Watertown? Schenectady? Gilderland? Peekskill? Port Jervis?
Albany.
There’s a really good hotdog stand in Schenectady, so probably not there.
Isn’t Troy supposed to be the shitty, run-down suburb of Albany?
Troy actually has a nice little area. Schenectady has a casino but is dangerously close to Scotia, one of the many Central/Upstate (whatever term you prefer) towns which is like walking into rural Alabama.
My God.
Sometimes, I’ll answer her, “Well, really, where is anybody?” Then after getting the confused look, I go back to the script.
Odd thing: SP printed up sheets with all of the basic information (Where am I? Why am I here? Are my bills being sent here?) and put them all over the house in strategic places as reminders for when we’re not in the room. Mom studies the sheets constantly, like a Talmudic scholar reading the Torah. But for whatever reason, we keep finding that the lower corners of the sheets are being torn off. We ask, “Mom, why are you tearing off the corners of the sheets?” She looks confused and responds, “I am?” “Yes, Mom, you’ve done it with all of them.” “I have no idea why.” “And Mom, we can’t find the torn off corners. What are you doing with them?” “I don’t know.” “Are you eating them?” She laughs and says, “I hope not, I don’t need the fiber!”
The wife’s grandma had post its all over her house. “Turn off lights” “Put food back in fridge” etc. She managed to do the basics thanks to those notes. Hopefully they’ll help your mom and help you and SP, too.
Sounds tough. Hope she at least feels well.
Although it may be easier to use real names instead of internet handles
Alzheimer’s runs rampant on my mom’s side of the family. Seeing my great-aunt, who was a strong independent woman, not being able to recognize me was a sad, sad moment in my life. This was a woman who taught shooting to pilots during WW2. She spent the last decade of her life in a care facility that was more like a prison. She always wanted to escape; find a way back to her home (which was already sold).
Her legacy lives on – LH Jr got some of this great aunt’s money (that my mom donated), now stashed away in several dividend reinvestment funds/stocks.
One of my best friends has that in the family. After her grandmother had it bad, she got a DNA test and had 2 gene mutations associated with it. Now she decided to go mostly keto, hope that works out for her.
In my family my Paternal Grandma and my Mother. Things do not bode well for old Flustus.
Aw, Jeez…. Sorry for all of that OMWC and SP. Maybe she’s just disoriented and will come around a little? You guys are the heroes that we will all need eventually.
No, unfortunately, this will only get worse. What scares us is that she had been living alone as things deteriorated.
My Grandmother lived alone for waaaaay to long. It was really smart of you to get on it before something tragic happened.
I’m really sorry you have to go through this. It’s heartbreaking.
I’m sorry for all of you. I suspect my wife will get this. She’s a genius lawyer with a string of appellate wins, but she is totally confused about everything else. Loses keys, fuck up directions forgets important things, etc. She gets angry about it. Blames me for her losing things and argues adamantly in favor of wrong directions. I don’t know that it a precursor, but I feel like she’s a percentage in that direction already.
Sorry 🙁
I saw this happen to my dad, whom in the span of a short year went from one of the most independent and self sufficient people you could find on the planet, to a baby in constant need of care. When the end came a year into this tragedy, part of me was happy to see him released from that crucible, even though it was a sad thing to happen.
You have my sympathy
Have you ever looked into giving her microdoses of magic mushrooms? There is some thought that it can help stimulate neural pathways that have gone dormant. Unfortunately there isn’t really any studies on it thanks to the drug ware.
War*
Huh… I didn’t even know this happened here in Cleveland.
All the True Acolytes got the encoded secret message, you waffler.
one bathroom down one to go
I thought you lived alone.
“No one needs more than one choice of bathroom” /Bernie
I thought we already established I have one bathroom than has the tub in it and one that has the toilet. Even one person needs both of those
Why are they in separate rooms?
Because it is Europe?
The bath goes in the bathroom, the toilet goes in the toilet room.
*Rogal Dorn voice*
Nnno.
*/Rogal*
Roger Dorn’s toiler is an office…
No, Rogal
Honestly, seems more hygienic this way. Same thing was in the apartment my friends in Vienna and Amsterdam rented, although in Romania it is no longer a thing for new houses.
As long as you don’t shit in the tub and wash yourself in the toilet, you are good.
It makes sense if you like to take long baths that it frees up the toilet for someone who might need it but doesn’t want to see you naked.
I had the same in a house in San Francisco. Perfect for 3 or 4 unrelated roommates.
My grandfather suffered from a similar affliction. He lived with my family during my teen years, which was before the proliferation of cell phones. He was also in very good physical condition, and each time the phone would ring he would jump up out of his chair and sprint to the phone (other family members would have to beat him, which resulted in some fun body checks). We would have to beat to the phone because he would pick up, say hello, and if there was a woman’s voice he would say:
“Blond or brunette?”
If the answer was brunette, he would immediately hangup the phone.
If the answer was blonde he would try to flirt.
If male answered he would either hangup or just put the phone down.
WAIT, ARE YOU MY GRANDSON?
I hope not because that would make my swastika tattoos pretty awkward.
Converted to Hinduism?
You saying you did his grandma?
Tech CEO denies that Jeffrey Epstein’s alleged madam, Ghislaine Maxwell, is hiding out at his house
Noted cocksman Eric Schmidt? They’re all in it together.
My God.
I’m more surprised they published his awkward change of topic than that he wanted to shift away from his embarassing associate.
It was awkward, which is why it was published.
How do you pronounce “Ghislaine”? I doubt I’m doing it right.
Rhymes with “orange.”
Trump?
That depends on how you pronounce orange.
You could either be rhyming grange and strange, or hinge and binge.
“Throatwarbler Mangrove”
Jizz Lane
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gropecunt_Lane
I was told there would be no need for these in a few years.
They need them to rescue the ships trying to prove the ice is gone.
My friend I mentioned earlier with family trouble with these diseases got some sort of checklist from a guy named Dale Bredesen and tries to get her blood-work mostly in those ranges, besides keto. I am not 100% how legit this guy is, but I have some reason to believe low processed carb diets and exerciser should help with neurodegenerative diseases. But who knows really.
Inexplicably. Without cause.
A man, allegedly a correctional officer, drove a pickup truck into a group of Jewish peaceful demonstrators protesting outside the Wyatt Detention Center in Rhode Island on Wednesday night.
Hundreds of Jewish protesters, mostly members of Never Again Action, a group that advocates for the rights of migrants detained by ICE, gathered outside the Donald W. Wyatt Detention facility in Central Falls on Wednesday evening. The protesters stood blocking the entrance of the facility, linking arms while chanting for the abolition of ICE and the end to America’s harsh immigration policies.
At around 10 p.m. local time, a dark-colored pickup truck drove slowly up to a group of roughly 40-50 protesters blocking the entrance to the location’s parking lot, before driving straight through the crowd, according to a video uploaded to Twitter.
——
Videos of the incident showed protesters screaming in panic as the car drove through the crowd. Shortly after the demonstrators began chanting “The whole world is watching” as they gathered around the truck.
Five protesters suffered non-life threatening injuries from being hit by the truck, Anthony told Newsweek. Two of the protesters were taken to hospital for their injuries. The extent of their injuries are currently unknown.
A dozen officers came out of the facility after protesters surrounded the truck and attempted to move the protesters, Anthony said. When the crowd did not disperse, the officers used pepper spray on several of the demonstrators, according to Anthony and a video of the incident.
“peaceful protest”?
Get the fuck out of the road.
I love this “immigration law = Holocaust” canard. That’s exactly how the Holocaust started, right? A bunch of Jews were trying to immigrate illegally into 1930s Germany because there was so much economic opportunity there, and Hitler told them that they can come here but they have to do it the legal way?
Todd Chrisley ‘tried to extort his own daughter over sex tape’ a month before he was indicted for federal tax evasion and bank fraud
Nice.
She gave her father a sex tape?
Note to WebDom: I love you but please don’t.
I’m sure she has already hacked all the posters here and will make the correct selection (based on their porn habits) of whom to send the tapes to.
Other than scat porn, I have pretty much everything else covered.
Are you asking for people to share poo-porn with you?
No, I was talking about my porn history. It covers everything but scat porn because poo is gross.
That is a bold statement.
His extreme tentacle furry snuff collection is in the pron record books.
Everyone has their own special purpose.
WebDom is way too high tech to send a tape.
A digital zoetrope?
Laser generated whip cracks
They all look the part, don’t they?
That is some seriously weird shit.
Well, Chrisley Knows Best.
Oh, right. I actually watched that freak-show once. I kept wondering why the gay dad wasn’t gay.
“Someone left old TVs outside 50 homes in Virginia while wearing a TV on his head. No one knows why.”
https://twitter.com/postlocal/status/1161663438969593857
CRT Man.
It’s what he does.
Sounds more like CTE man.
“Seemed like a good idea at the time, Cap’n.”
Max Headroom isn’t getting any younger.
Thanks for the shit I have to recycle now, dumbass.
Sharp!
https://www.foxnews.com/auto/how-much-2020-chevrolet-corvette-stingray-will-cost
“Some of us were harmed tonight, but there are people ICE has detained that are harmed everyday. That’s why we’re doing what we’re doing, and we’re going to keep doing it,” Anthony said.
Such brave.
Just wait ’til Trump’s death squad shows up and machine guns them all and dumps their bodies into the sea.
“Nearly 200 House Democrats have signed onto a bill that would ban semi-automatic firearms and large-capacity magazines.”
https://twitter.com/thehill/status/1161670584352350210
https://thehill.com/homenews/house/457323-assault-weapons-ban-picks-up-steam-in-congress
““We have to remind the American people that the children that were gunned down with assault weapons at Sandy Hook Elementary, their bodies had to be removed with shovels; they were smashed to pieces,””
No children were gunned down with assault weapons at Sandy Hook Elementary. The shooter did not use an assault weapon, and even if he did, Connecticut already had an assault weapon ban.
That’s why they wanted a double assault weapons ban in our people’s republic. And to take guns away from every law abiding citizen. had nothing to do with the fact our political class is amongst the worst and most corrupt bunch of asshats you could ever imagine and always worried that someone might finally have enough of them robbing us both of our hard earned money and freedoms.
“NEW: Police sources identified the gunman in a standoff at a Tioga apartment building that left six police officers injured as Maurice Hill, 36, a Philadelphia man with a lengthy history of gun convictions”
https://twitter.com/SeanLangille/status/1161834911571030016
“In North Philly standoff, alleged cop shooter Maurice Hill has a long criminal history
Police sources identified the gunman in a standoff at a Tioga apartment building that left six police officers injured as Maurice Hill, 36, a Philadelphia man with a lengthy history of gun convictions and of resisting attempts to bring him to justice.”
https://www.inquirer.com/news/philadelphia-police-shootings-six-shot-suspect-maurice-hill-20190815.html
We just need to pass a law that people have to obey the law.
would ban semi-automatic firearms
There are over 300 million firearms in 60-80 million hands, withe a huge portion if not most being semi-auto. So, good luck I guess.
Based on sales figures of new firearms, the number has to be at least 600 million firearms in private hands in the US, if we assume the 300 million figure was accurate around the time it first appeared.
Why Tiny Dicks Might Come Back Into Fashion
Studied antique penile depictions…
Sounds like appologia from someone whom the Greeks would rape.
“Studied antique penile depictions”
With a vengeance
Mayberry RFD
https://www.foxnews.com/us/crowd-of-onlookers-taunt-police-during-philadelphia-standoff-reports
Today’s famous birthdays:
Napoleon
Panama Canal
robc
I am officially old today. But I can get cheap coffee at McDs.
Do you know what always gets a laugh? Say like, “I’m 29 with______ years experience.”
Everyone will laugh their balls off.
birthdays are the worst
Happy Birthday, you old fuck!
What’s officially old, anyway? I turned 52 a couple weeks ago and feel every goddamn one of them…
Kids, anyway.
My kids are older than you
And Happy Birthday, ROB C ! They only come once a year, if you are lucky.
Think I found my next 2020 calendar. To supplement the despair.com custom 16 month calendar I just ordered yesterday.
Nice.
I know this one. She’s pretty awesome.
evidently, I am SP’s mother in law
oop sorry guys, didn’t mean to make light of things, hadn’t read more comments, sorry to hear it is a tough situation. I wish happiness for her, and strength for you guys.
No worries, quite the contrary, humor is what gets us through and keeps us sane.
“At Glibertarians.com, there is no such thing as ‘too soon.'”
Crusty is here now. We’ll see if that axiom holds.
Crusty’s motto is there is no line to cross
That’s what I tell my wife in bed.
See Grauniad article below.
Following Tip, Police In Westchester County Town Find Alarming Weapons Arsenal In Rear Of SUV
And you Libertarians think this should be legal.
A pistol grip!?!
Where’s my fainting couch!
Where’s the alarming arsenal?
Also, what’s a muzzle break? Is is from the same kit as the shoulder thing that goes up, automatic rounds and magazine clips?
It’s a misspelled device that permanently damages your ears instead of temporarily hurting your shoulder.
Oh, a Boom Vox.
Two, two! Bic lighters!
telescopic butt stocks
So shaped like a telescope or its itty bitty?
muzzle breaks
Got it. Non-functional then.
Every time Stephen Ronco opens his mouth, a bit more oxygen is stolen from the earth. What a putz.
My rifle has a telescoping stock AND a bayonet lug!
Honestly, the bayonet lug is kind of annoying.
That’s your gun, not your rifle
Submitted without comment.
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2019/aug/09/life-in-sex-premature-ejaculator
Dribbling some chunky splooge out of your little dingle a little quickly is big business.
Why do you hate capitalism, bro?
I will keep you safe, America
Sen. Kamala Harris faced criticism Wednesday for promoting her campaign’s gun control plan during an appearance on CNN that coincided with breaking news about the police standoff in Philadelphia in which six officers were shot.
“When will it stop?” the 2020 Democratic presidential candidate from California asked CNN’s Wolf Blitzer when he asked for her reaction to the initial reports of the shooting.
Stop resisting. Once Big Bad Momma has taken away all the bad man gunz, we will have nothing to worry about.
“When will it stop?”
Quick guess is never.
Yo, I don’t know…
Mike M.?
>>“When will it stop?
When you’re dead…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z2Q7YRDL90E
I still don’t know why they just didn’t call in Cobra.
Good morning, SP and the marauding horde!
Great lynx this morning and an absolutely exceptional musical selection.
Pretty cool trick..and song.
https://youtu.be/fEATei2wewY
I got a plan. You got a plan. All God’s chilluns got a plan.
Sen. Cory Booker’s (D-N.J.) presidential campaign released his plan to combat hate crimes, including white supremacist violence, on Thursday in the wake of the mass shooting in El Paso, Texas, that killed 22 and appeared to target the Hispanic community.
The plan calls for the creation of a White House Office on Hate Crimes and White Supremacist Violence, along with the establishment of an external advisory group made up of community stakeholders.
The advisory group would share information on specific communities with the White House, FBI, Justice Department and Homeland Security, according to Booker’s campaign.
The strategy also looks to improve the data available on hate crimes and violence and calls for an end to the usage of the term, “racially motivated violent extremism.”
I plan to study the problem in depth, in order to find a way to blame it all on those who oppose me.
Now see, accusations of government bias against white people is a recruiting point used by actual white supremacists (e.g. Stormfront people). What does he think it will accomplish to have a government department specifically designed to go after racists of one particular race?
It’s almost like he doesn’t really want the job.
…and put as many of my cronies on another useless, pointless government bureaucracy so they can get 6 figures a year while doing 6 hours of “work” a week.
You hope. More likely 60,000 dedicated true believers
New Cabinet position? I’m not too bust right now
busy
*Q Rejected*
Christ.
What an asshole.
White House Office on Hate Crimes and White Supremacist Violence
Wouldn’t that be covered under “Hate Crimes*”?
*Which shouldn’t be a thing because it amounts to thought-crime.
Helen Keller… Socialist?!
This surprises people? Most of the ‘heroes’ foisted on us by teachers and media in the 20th century were socialists, communists, or fellow travelers. That was the point.
Welcome to the World of Competitive Wiffle Ball
The greatest generation never engaged in such hi jinks – they sat in bowling alleys and smoked cigarettes and threw back pitches of cheap, AMERICAN beer.
This is why we lost in Iraq and Afghanistan.
Right second bathroom done
Checklist:
Straighten up dusted the bedrooms, changed the bed sheets, two loads of laundry, vacuumed the whole apartment, cleaned the kitchen counters, stove and oven, did the bathrooms.
All is left is to mop the tiles in the kitchen/bathrooms and do the balcony.
dishwasher is done so I have to unload that
Pie, did you take meth this morning and need to work off the energy?
Nope. When I have no work due to public holidays I use the free time to clean the house.
Given the number of Euroholidays, your place must be spotless.
not that many. also to be spotless one would have to clean everything twice a week. I do it once every two weeks.
Have you tried pooping less often?
that makes no sense. dust gathers at the same rate irrespective
Ok If you want fewer Vampire jokes I would suggest that this post was an error.
calls for an end to the usage of the term, “racially motivated violent extremism.”
That could be misconstrued as some sort of admission of the possibility of existence of non-white racial bias. No go.
The 60,000 Men Obsessed With ‘That True Detective Scene With Alexandra Daddario’
jfc
well there be billions out there let them do their thing … don’t fetish shame
Q has to be in that sub Reddit somewhere.
I wonder if there’s any kind of subreddit for Magic Mike outtakes or anything.
Well she’s a smoke show.
Who will end this deadly scourge?
The semiautomatic rifle used by a convicted felon in a gun battle with police off the 215 Freeway on Monday, killing CHP Officer Andre Moye and wounding two of his colleagues, was a “ghost gun” that cannot be traced by authorities, according to law enforcement sources.
Investigators have publicly described the gun used in the gun battle only as a rifle, but a law enforcement source with knowledge of the investigation told The Times that Aaron Luther used an “AR-15-style rifle” in the fatal gun battle. The sources spoke on condition of anonymity in order to discuss the case candidly.
Ghost guns are unserialized weapons that are manufactured from parts that can be ordered through the mail or are machined parts acquired from underground makers.
The Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives has been unable to trace the weapon used by Luther, two law enforcement sources with knowledge of the investigation said.
Luther, a convicted felon with an extensive criminal background, would not have been allowed to possess a firearm under California law because of his criminal record.
Authorities are seeing a proliferation of such untraceable weapons.
“We need to be able to trace these weapons!” More dopey magical thinking. They are just going to beat this drum as hard as they possibly can. I should probably buy an 80% 1911 frame before I have to whittle one out of a chunk of meteorite from scratch.
If only we had one more law for this criminal to ignore.
IOW banning these weapons is not only unconstitutional, it is also impractical and unenforceable.
“We gotta get these homemade zip guns outta the hands of the Mexicans gangs in LA”
Forgotten from the 1940s
Speaking of pussies.
https://hotair.com/archives/jazz-shaw/2019/08/15/hoo-boy-uk-gender-stereotype-rules-running/
Three complaints or three million, neither is a sufficient cause for the government to say it can’t be played.
It has nothing to do with complaints. It is Lysenkoism. They really think if they can eliminate all depictions of males acting male and females acting female they can create the New Soviet Tranny
I’m not saying the decision was motivated by the complaints, those were mere excuses. I’m saying no number of complaints are sufficient to excuse such behaviour.
Lame.
Is there much to be said for their nation? Looks to me like they’ve lost.
Dude is right, though, giving an inch is a mistake.
They help us break the rules against spying on our own citizens!
/Jizz Shaw
giving an inch
An inch? I’ll give six. ///rimshot.
Thanks, I’ll be here all week.
Trump Is Driving Women Into Law School
Oh fuck.
So U.S. law schools will for at least the next few years be churning out more smart, politically engaged, probably left-leaning lawyers
Citation definitely needed.
smart…left-leaning
If they were smart they wouldn’t be.
I’ll take spurious correlation for $200 Alex.
Universal Legal Care
The last thing we need is lawyers in politics.
This is fucking awful and the best case I’ve heard for anyone else in 2020.
politically engaged
But are they? I am sure they all *think* they are wonks.
OMWC – Nice troll job last night. I’m glad that I was able to spot it as a rewrite of old progressive era thinkpieces (the standard of living language gave it away).
Also, I’m going to change my Grinder name to Dusky Peril
It was funny as hell. I just read it this morning and it took me a minute to catch on.
I was shaking my head, wondering if I’d stumbled into the abyss. Read the whole thing and decided I was not a libertarian anymore.
China Readies Response to Tariffs, Resists Hong Kong Advice
This is going to turn out well for everyone.
I’m running for president, my platform is: everyone, mind your own fucking business
I’ll vote for you.
He’ll never win. The way most electronic voting machine work, casting a vote for him would likely brick the machine.
And yes, I had to look that up to make sure I had it right
In political discourse, we hear so many appeals to innate human dignity — ironic that it should so often be from people who implicitly view their fellows as nothing more than objects, resources to be used in furtherance of their own desired ends.
</soapbox mode>
dammit all, I did it again .. not supposed to be reply
Headline: New Trade Deal Puts US and China on Equal Footing
Body Text: In a stunning move , described by some 16 year old on Twitter as “Much Hero so Brave” President Warren today signed a Trade deal that permanently eliminates any possibility of trade imbalances or unfair competition with China. The Trade deal had previously been viewed as impossible due to concerns that old busted notions of ‘rights’ and slavish respect for the “Constitution” (note to readers, It’s some old crap that is actually written on ANIMAL skin by white dudes) would prevent the US from implementing its more daring provisions.
Just yesterday in a unique declaratory judgment Chief Justice Obama wrote the decision of a 12 to 5 Court. “Precedent clearly shows that the Constitution is not a suicide pact. The rights and limits set out in our Constitution were never intended to stop GOOD people from doing GOOD things. I mean no one could possibly mean the law to prevent the wise from choosing the proper path toward our Great Leap Forward. Accordingly the Court Rules that the Constitution can never prevent the Nomenklatura from taking any action.
Terms of the Trade Agreement are not being disclosed to the public. To determine what your personal responsibilities are in the new 5 year mutual production plan please report to your local political officer.
Jeez, don’t even joke like that.
how about al gore ..
Early winter? We don’t need cold that badly.
U.S. law schools will for at least the next few years be churning out more smart, politically engaged, probably left-leaning lawyers, most of them women.
“Churning out” sounds right. What this country needs is more topless baristas with law degrees.
Not in Washington state!
Fucking killjoys.
Topless lawyers sounds like a good place to start.
Have you seen your average lawyer? They wear multiple layers for good reason.
There are a couple of types of women that go to law school. One of those types matches your comment. The other doesn’t.
The law of nude beaches applies – the people who are most inclined to take off their clothes are the ones you really don’t want to.
Oh look, a lawyer is here to law-splain female law students to us. What a surprise.
*ponders*
Out of my law school class of 550, I think half were women, maybe not quite half, so call it 200 women.
Three or four were actually genuinely pretty. Another cohort were ordinarily good looking. Overall, I would say that on looks alone, the group was fairly typical for 22 – 25 year old women.
Now, on personality . . . .
Don’t just think of when they’re in law school. Think of the decades afterwards.
omg they can ruin everything
Much like immigration, the selection process will include BMI, cup size and waist-hip ratio.
JFC Q, you gotta add a measure of bilateral facial symmetry here or we’ll be flooded with curvy Mediterranean butterfaces.
thicc?
Yeah, not seeing the problem. Doggy style solves a multitude of issues in that regard.
I’m onboard.
U.S. law schools will for at least the next few years be churning out more smart, politically engaged, probably left-leaning lawyers, most of them women.
You can’t even say “pick any two”.
Nah, this is just proof that with a lawyer glut, legal jobs are lower-paying and lower-status than they once were. And as we all know, the patriarchy forces women into low-paying and low-status jobs.
In my very limited experience, I know four people who’ve passed the Maryland bar. Two are women. Of the four, two are prosecutors, one is on the Governor’s staff, and one left the private practice she was briefly with and got her real estate license. There are so many lawyers around here that it’s basically like getting a basket-weaving degree. You’d be better off with an English degree.
What time is it?
Old skool goodness.
Huh. I thought his backing band was ‘the Knights’. (srsly)
Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis were also in that band. Along with Jellybean Johnson and Jerome Benton.
Just a fantastic moment in music.
Ah, crap… it was Otis Day & the Knights.
if we have been learning anything from our betters, it is that there is only one possible explanation for your having confused the two
Drinking the water in Flint?
Obviously, my horrific racism has come to light. I shall report for mandatory flogging and re-education.
2 doors down, on the left — room 101
fucken solid
Two things:
1. I really like SP’s link formatting.
2. The preview box on the handy “Next” and “Previous” buttons does not.
What if, instead of licensing guns, we licensed criminals? They could have their own union, and a retirement plan, and accreditation…
That way, we could get some badly needed professionalism back into the trade.
It could work.
As Terry Pratchett’s Patrician puts it — if we’re going to have crime, it might as well be organized.
Yeah, wait. That’s actually how the criminal guilds work in Discworld. Not a bad idea, really, as ideas go.
Who cracks down on unlicensed criminals?
In Discworld? The licensed criminals. Take the Thieves’ Guild. They’re limited to a certain number of thefts per thief per month (IIRC) and have to give the victim a receipt, because they’re not allowed to rob the same person more than once in a year, say. Residents can get around this by paying an annual fee to avoid being robbed. If an unlicensed thief is caught stealing, they generally prefer to be turned in to the police rather than caught by the guild, because the police will just put them in jail rather than kill them.
I could get on board with this idea, as long as we get to vote for the criminals from time to time.
Already are, the voting part
Chief Justice Obama wrote the decision of a 12 to 5 Court. “Precedent clearly shows that the Constitution is not a suicide pact. The rights and limits set out in our Constitution were never intended to stop GOOD people from doing GOOD things.
That literally made my head hurt, and caused ringing in my ears.
Also from a Chief Justice Obama opinion:
“The Necessary and Proper Clause authorized the government to do whatever is necessary. It is necessary that something must be done, this is something, therefor it is necessary that this be done, and it is thus authorized by the Constitution.”
Final CJ Obama opinion:
“The Constitution was written by men. Who says they were right? Can we do better? Yes we can.”
Considering the target groups here were CEOs and cops, two demographics much more likely to be sociopaths, I find this unsurprising.
https://www.askmen.com/news/dating/ceos-who-cheat-on-partners-also-cheat-at-work-says-study.html
Not a Republican, but if dipshit Marxist professors were considered an ethnic group I could get on board.
https://www.campusreform.org/?ID=13572
“Professor, profess…it turns out they want an ‘ethic cleansing’ – to get rid of academics who have no sense of right or wrong beyond their political goals.”
?♂️ … “NAZIS!!!”
Progjection…
These types have left Marx in the dust and gone full-bore Maoist.
OM and SP: I’m tied up today, but I wanted to add my two cents.
I interact from time to time with complete strangers who have dementia. It breaks my heart to see their confusion and anxiety. I can’t imagine how hard it must be to see that in your mother everyday, and to do the right thing by interacting with her as patiently and compassionately as you are doing. Good on you, and God bless.
Kinky.
I hope I have the foresight to recognize the onset, so I can go out in the garage and turn on the engine.
I fear the sufferer can’t tell, unless you pick up lucid moments where you’ve ended up somplace you don’t remember going to.
How did I get here?
This is not my beautiful house!
This is not my beautiful wife!
This is the story, in full, so no link. Via NPR:
Seven years ago, Maj. Jason Brezler sent an urgent message to a fellow Marine in Afghanistan, warning him about an insider threat. The warning wasn’t heeded, and two weeks later, three U.S. troops were dead.
What did attract attention was that Brezler had sent classified information over an insecure network. The Marine Corps then embarked on what would be a multiyear effort to kick out Brezler — claiming it was for mishandling information. Brezler maintained it was retaliation for calling attention to deaths he thought might have been prevented.
The U.S. Navy Board of Inquiry decided to remove Brezler from service with an honorable discharge: Brezler wouldn’t lose any benefits or rank; he just wouldn’t be a Marine anymore.
“In light of my very strong desire to continue to serve and lead Marines, it didn’t feel honorable,” he told NPR in 2016.
So Brezler sued in federal court and won a new hearing. Earlier this month he sat before a board of inquiry again, and on Aug. 9, seven years after he sent the warning to Afghanistan, the panel of military officers ruled in his favor.
“The Board finds that none of the reasons listed above warrant Maj. Brezler’s separation from the naval service and recommends closing the case,” the decision read.
On Wednesday, Brezler told NPR: “I am grateful that I will again have the opportunity to serve and contribute as a leader of Marines.”
Has anybody heard about this? It seems… weird.
I’ve read a few articles about it this week in the Early Bird (think military times and other sites have carried it too). The more you think about it, the weirder it sounds. I know it references classified material, but it wouldn’t be classified if all he said was to warn his unit about a corrupt jackass that he or his unit had dealt with previously. The only real classified stuff my coworkers and I could think of was if he passed SIGINT – but warning of an actual individual being officially posted would presumably have come from open source, etc.
At the same time, realistically, if he didn’t have access to a classified email, and he was seriously concerned, he realistically could have communicated to another person stateside and given them the info to communicate.
Doesn’t that seem that weird, assuming he made a stink about it after his warning was ignored and soldiers died. Especially if he went outside the chain of command.
If I am remembering this correctly…..Brezler was an intel officer. I’m pretty sure he was a reservist. He used his personal laptop when he was in Afghan and thus had some classified files on it. After he went back to civilian life, he was in touch with a friend who was a fellow intel officer in Afghanistan. Through this friend he discovered that a shady Afghan policeman who had previously been banned from US bases was working on a Marine base. Brezler told him the guy was no good and needed to be kicked off the base. The friend’s command was told this and rejected it. Brezler then emailed his friend files on the Afghan from his own tour, which were still on his laptop in an attempt to convince them to get rid of the guy. It didn’t work, and shortly afterward a boy who worked for the Afghan cop attacked Marines on the base, killing three air wing maintenance guys.
Sending files, etc would be the problem obviously. I may have heard about this when it first broke, but the reporting this week has been abysmal on the details.
That’s it, pretty much. Brezler left a little too much yolk on the faces of people up the chain. He is not the first to have this happen. I’m familiar with a couple of others who exercised some moral courage at the cost of their careers – but unfortunately at no cost to the assholes who took retribution against them for telling the truth.
Soon a cottage industry will pop up in which men with enormous schlongs will sell the rights to their dicks after they die.
https://melmagazine.com/en-us/story/penis-transplants-bottom-surgery
Don’t they stop working so well as they age? Or is that a side effect of the circularoty system?
rigor mortis ftw
I’d imagine it would be really fucking wrinkly, too. Skin loses collagen as the aging process goes on.
https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2019/08/epstein-autopsy-broken-neck-bones-more-consistent-homicide-suicide-strangulation.html
Epstein Autopsy Reportedly Shows Broken Neck Bones More Consistent With Homicide Than Suicide
The autopsy conducted in the wake of Jeffrey Epstein’s death by apparent suicide shows the financier suffered multiple breaks in his neck bones, which while possible during instances of suicidal hanging, the Washington Post reports, is more commonly found in homicide victims of strangulation.
Trump has gotten to Slate and the Post
The autopsy conducted in the wake of Jeffrey Epstein’s death by apparent suicide shows the financier suffered multiple breaks in his neck bones, which while possible during instances of suicidal hanging, the Washington Post reports, is more commonly found in homicide victims of strangulation.
It’s not just Trump it’s the entire deep state.
https://www.reuters.com/article/us-norway-crash-idUSKCN1V423N
Womp Womp.
I was pretty sure the weight/energy storage ratio on batteires was still shit. Not that great for cars, even worse for aircraft. Especially since with fuel on aircraft, you get lighter as you go.
I’m trying to think about how big the batteries have to be to power a plane.
Also curious about how much more “effecient” this could be if it’s essentially a storage device for fossil fuel, which itself is the energy storage device. Unless you have a fully decarbonized chain.
The only electric plane I knew of was a drone that was a giant wing, all solar panel, with the rest of it being battery for night operations. It had a glide profile that could keep it in the air for eons on momentum alone. It literally had no payload capacity.
It’s more efficient because shut up.
^This. Electricity is energy, like wires (the good kind, though) and computers, and it doesn’t make any smoke, so there’s no pollution, which makes it morally superior and better in all ways than stupid old fossil fuels, which are old and dumb because they even have “fossil” in the name.
For a single aisle air transport jet, I heard the batteries will be equivalent to 23 elephants.
Asian or African Elephants?
That actually came up.
How many coconuts can an African elephant carry?
Where do I sign up?
To be fair, it could be totally unrelated to the battery. On the other hand, it’s not like they have to re-invent the airplane, they’ve just got to rig it to run off of a battery system. Maybe there are weight issues that come up, but it’s not like the principles behind aviation fundamentally change because you’re using electricity to power the engine.
It’s not that you can’t fly an electric plane, it’s that you’re going to have range issues.
I assume that an airline using electric planes would be able to drop batteries out of the craft and swap them to save on recharge downtime for the craft itself, unless it’s an emergency landing at an airport they don’t normally operate out of.
On board nuclear reactors might solve the range issues.
They actually proposed that before.
The weight and the spewing radiation from insuffiicent shielding made them not go forward.
Maybe after fusion becomes a reality.
A friend of mine who’s a pilot explained the whole fuel thing to me. As you fly a plane you’re constantly reducing the weight as you burn fuel, and depending on a number of factors this affects how the plane handles, your range, etc. In an electric plane, the weight never changes, so that’s going to affect range adversely. In a normal plane, as you burn fuel you get energy AND you lose weight.
Engines are also way more efficient at higher altitudes (think 32k-36k-ish, depending on the engine) which is in part the reason for the entire aviation control system that we (and the world) have. For example, going east you get odd 1000′ intervals on the airways, and going west you get even: it keeps at least a 1000′ of altitude between commercial airliners. There are a ton of other examples of this, too.
We’ll have none of that nonsense around here.
Though it be nonsense, it is a perfectly valid view, and there is nothing wrong with that, to be sure.