Man, its good to have my left eye back. Apparently, there was enough inflammation that the eye doctor was concerned I had an autoimmune condition or systemic infections. I think the eye was just an over-achiever. After 24 hours on steroid drops, I could see fine out of it. I was, I admit, a liiiitttle concerned when she said, “come back Tuesday, but if you experience any excruciating pain between now (Saturday) and Tuesday, call these people.” Thankfully, at no point did my eye feel as if it were being crucified. So, I learned two things (1) you can go into pretty much any eye-glass place in the world and get your eye looked at (really wish I had known that Wednesday) and (2) if you can’t see anything but a giant blur out of your eye (and that’s not normal) you should go find a corner optometrist and have them give you steroid drops.
Oh, and I guess, (3) after two days on steroid drops your eye goes from swollen to swole (sorry, couldn’t help it, I blame the drugs)
Salon swings its Republican coverage from idiot morons to evil geniuses.
Florida Man visits England? I understand why they want to come at the guy from above, but I figure double clipping on nylon harnesses (standard climbing gear in any American plant) could have gotten the guy in less than six hours. Worst case, the guy freaks out and takes the long ride with the fast stop alone. Maybe dart him from the helicopter and then climb to get him.
…And then the Monkey Buddha said unto her, “Go unto the surrounding lands and gather a mustard seed from each house that has not experienced loss, if you can gather a handful, I shall restore your child.” After speculating on a real possibility of substantial vision loss in my eye, I am philosophical.
Who was this guy? Dribble?
“you should go find a corner optometrist and have them give you steroid drops”
I assume there are some states that require you to go to a real eye doctor.
I used to think that optometrists were little better than opticians (eyeglass makers) but actually go through quite a bit of medical training for US licensure. This is of course one of those cartelization, barriers to entry things.
I was surprised during my last eye exam at how many more “procedures” take place. Take my blood pressure? Really??
Listen, they just can’t give you new frames unless they check your prostate.
STEVE SMITH SEE FUTURE IN OPTOMETRY
It will clear up your vision, having your eyes bug out like that.
I got LASIK a couple years ago and have to get an annual exam to maintain my ‘fix it for life’ warranty. I go to the place that did the procedure as all they do is check my goddamn eyes and refrain from trying to sell me anything.
My dentist does that now as well. She said it’s from the Obamacare act or something along those lines.
I think they are looking for diabetes and high blood pressure related eye issues.
My most recent optometrist appt was excellent.
My right eye was suddenly blurry so I was concerned about retina problems, but the optometrist took his measurements and imaged my eyeballs.
He said “By any chance, do you take steroids?” I do for immune issues and asthma so I answered in the affirmative.
He said that I had a type and location of cataract (!!!) that was specifically associated with steroids.
I was impressed.
It’s a good idea. I had high blood pressure without knowing it, and it caused some eye damage before being caught.
A significant portion of them are stoners.
We were talking about HVAC filters this morning.
This is why I have one.
10am this morning. It’s only gotten worse, and the wind has shifted.
ah yes, Fire season
I just spent $190 on a box of filters for my high-speed geo-thermal set-up.
But the filters do last a lot longer than my old ones, so it’s probably a wash.
What is your geothermal set up?
You toss a virgin into a volcano so the gods lower your electric bill.
*Takes notes *
*does calculation*
It checks out.
I’ve got a 4 ton Waterfurnace and a 300 foot long patch of fucked up back yard from the install.
But my bill runs anywhere from $30-90 cheaper per month from last year.
Is that a sand storm?
fire
Wormsign.
We TOLD Playa to walk without rhythm, so as to not attract a worm. But did he listen? Nooooo.
I’m impressed that he has rhythm.
I cam upon him one Sunday night.
Getty Fire
My building is right behind that hanger. I’m doing my own personal filtration. I was the last batch of traffic allowed through the Sepulveda pass this morning. Saw a wall of flames on the hill just north of the getty. 5 minutes later and I’d have just called in absent because they would have made me drive all the way around.
Luckily, Northbound is still open.
I rarely go home that way, but if it’s open, today I might. Everyone else will be scared away.
!!
;;
( . )Y( . )
^Fake.
Yeah, you can tell from the Y.
Old lady version:
V V
* *
((^))
If you do have an infection, and they give you steroids, it can make the problem a lot worse.
like an infection on steroids?
Swole all up!
Suspension trauma is a pretty grizzly way to go. It can happen to you in good harnesses. I imagine getting suspended by your pants is much worse.
Sorry for the downer, but the baby monkey story hit a bit hard.
I mentioned yesterday that my dog was sick, and the prognosis uncertain. Unfortunately, he took a serious turn for the worst overnight and was helped to the Rainbow Bridge this afternoon.
I’d had him from 17 weeks, he was almost 13 years. My little buddy is gone and I’m heartbroken.
ouch, sorry for the loss,
That sucks, sorry.
I normally hate gif avatars, but that rocks. Hyaena v2.0 is a great improvement.
The Hyena- Nature’s A**hole
https://youtu.be/8yF3z-Z284o?t=42
For version 3, the giraffes should be missionary.
Okay, somebody needs to explain this to me. Glibmeme I missed, apparently.
Read this and all will be revealed.
Here’s a photogragh taken at the time.
The Hair is there, but where’s the Hat?
Never mind, obviously he took the picture.
I’m so sorry!
Dogs are so wonderful and happy all the time. Losing them leaves a BIG hole. Sorry about you buddy, SK.
Sorry for your loss.
Deepest condolences, been through it too many times myself.
I’m sorry about your little buddy.
Sorry to hear.
I am so, so sorry.
I’m so sorry. All our pets are old timers and I’m trying to get myself emotionally prepared for the inevitable.
Yeah, it’s very tough. I thought I was better prepared than I was. But that’s probably normal. They are small lives that become tightly entangled with ours, and it’s always a wound when they go, regardless of how they go.
Yes. The spousal unit and I have had three dogs, and two are gone. When the first one died, we were seriously screwed up for a few days. We learned from the first one’s experience to do better for the second one (not try to do heroic measures to save her life, but rather let her go before the pain started to interfere with her life)
You gave that little critter a good life, far better and longer than he/she would have had in the wild, and with far more emotional and social richness to boot. ”You done good.”
Thanks. He was my 7th, it doesn’t get any easier.
Relevant
That’s an interesting shift in interpretation. I like it.
Thank you, that’s excellent.
Agreed. That got me.
Years ago, James Lileks wrote about losing his family dog. It was shortly before we lost one of ours. It changed my thinking; what I took away from it was a reminder that I have a duty to my dogs, and that postponing the inevitable past a certain point is selfish and a failure to meet my obligations.
Arranging for a dog to be euthanized is your final gift to your dog.
Yes, very much so. We owe a duty to our pets and part of that is proper end-of-life care, up to and including making that final decision.
The duty of kindness can be cruel, but it remains a duty.
Agreed, but I’m very much more hateful about it, though I never say anything.
I wince when I read stories of people extending their pets’ lives with medication or surgeries, and people praise them for their heroic efforts. Apart from the money aspect, I find it extraordinarily selfish and I always want to say, “Do you know how much of a dick you’re being? Yeah, it hurts to let them go. Don’t make them suffer because you don’t want to grieve.”
My last old lady cat was breathing something terrible and I finally figured out she had congestive heart failure. I made the decision. Mr. Mojeaux wasn’t ready to let her go yet, but the old girl was miserable.
Sorry if that came out more harshly than it should, but I feel strongly about this.
I don’t know how I feel about that with humans, though philosophically speaking it would be a kindness and a mercy. I often feel that one need not help someone end their lives, but if relatives were willing to forego heroic treatment, the disease process would come to a conclusion in a timely manner and with less trauma to the dying person, and more dignity and grace.
I agree. Quality of life is so much more important than quantity.
I learned this at a gut level with my first. They called from his stomach surgery with the bad news that there were tumors throughout his abdomen.
Okay, what can you do?
Oh, procedure x.
How long does that extend lifespan?
Three days on average. After major abdominal surgery.
You’re not doing that to my dog, don’t let him wake up.
I can’t understand not asking. I can’t understand taking the option.
Yes. We’ve lost a number of cats in the last decade. It’s always hard. Sorry.
That’s awful. My condolences
Sorry 🙁
Sorry to hear about your doggie.
I’m really sorry. That’s just brutal.
Sorry.
That’s awful. Sorry to hear.
Condolences.
Condolences.
It’s the worst part of having a pet, but it is a big part of it.
Got a laundry list of things God done wrong, but not letting our dogs live as long as us is mighty high on that list.
It works worse the other way.
I’m sorry to hear that.
Sorry,
They are indeed family members.
Pour out a can of Alpo in his honor.
Sorry for your loss.
And yes, the monkey story is a nut puncher.
I’m so sorry to hear about your dog
Late to the party, but sorry for your loss. I sometimes don’t envy you current pet owners at all. I haven’t had any for more than a decade now. Now that wifey and I are empty nesters and looking to buy a new home, we’re all of the sudden discussing adding some additions to our little family, furry ones with 4 legs. A big house with just the 2 of us, I think will seem too empty. But losing one is tough.
I’d like to thank everyone for their condolences this morning.
It was good to get that stuff off my chest.
Missed that. My condolences. He sounds like he led a fascinating life.
Had to go back for that. Hell of a tribute. Moving. My condolences.
I’m so sorry for your loss tarran
Florida Man visits England?
I think I know why it took so long:
How many agencies were on that helicopter, anyway?
I assume the whole operation began at a pub or distillery.
Pelosi says House will vote this week on resolution formalizing impeachment procedures
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi said Monday the House will vote this week on a resolution that would formalize procedures for the Trump impeachment inquiry.
“We are taking this step to eliminate any doubt as to whether the Trump Administration may withhold documents, prevent witness testimony, disregard duly authorized subpoenas, or continue obstructing the House of Representatives,” Pelosi said in a letter sent to Democratic House lawmakers.
Fox News has learned the vote will take place Thursday on the House floor.
Your subpoenas are illegitimate until you pass the resolution.
About time. If the polling I’ve seen on how this plays outside Deep Blue enclaves is accurate, this will be a hard vote for a fair number of Dem Reps to make.
I wonder if the formalized procedures will include limitations on how Republican representatives participate in the process, and will address the “secret” hearings that they have been holding.
I suspect the real reason they are holding the vote is they don’t think they can get their mitts on Mueller’s grand jury evidence without it.
I think its just a clown show. It doesn’t matter what happens, just so long as something is going on that’s too confusing for the median voter to understand, sounds bad for Trump, and it takes forever will be all that’s really needed.
Leaders.
Being a leader doesn’t require a title.
Having a title doesn’t make you a leader.
I suspect you are right. I’m still not convinced they will get those records but I am sure the Supremes will have to make the decision.
What happened to separation of powers?
They can do their own investigation. Good luck with that.
Election week. Totes coincidental, I are sure.
Playing politics with a political process doesn’t sit well with me, not that it matters in the grand scheme.
If you want to impeach, hold the vote. However, I think Nancy jumped the gun with her announcment and the reason we are seeing this theater playout is to actually hope something falls in their laps.
It was collusion…then it wasn’t. It was quid-pro-quo (which is all of politics)…then it wasn’t. I think they have settled in on abusive of power, which will be interesting to see how they come up with that.
Playing politics with a political process
What should they play? 😉
Russian roulette?
With a semi-auto?
I like the cut of your jib.
Since it’s a two party system they should use a double barrel shotty.
Calvinball.
Softball with Republicans…i keed i keed
I think they have settled in on abusive of power,
i’m still waiting to hear what crime he is accused of. Maybe the vote will clarify that. I read “Treason, Bribery, or other high Crimes and Misdemeanors” to mean a President can only be impeached for an actual crime.
The precedent seems to go the other way, for what its worth.
I don’t really know what the original public meaning of that phrase is. My preference is that impeachments of the president are regular, safe, and effective, like a board removing a CEO when they don’t like what he’s doing.
Although I wish the change started with any president other than Trump. Trump came to win his election on the shoulders of voters that the establishment has been doing its damndest to ignore, and the voting booth reserved for those people the power to make themselves be recognized by their countrymen. This was, I think, a good thing. We are all stuck in this together until the great ancap dissolution foretold by St. Neil of Stevenson.
If this president gets a one off impeachment for being icky, and representing icky, I don’t think that’s good for the polity. Like, at all.
I actually believe the 21st Century will be a fertile one for the breakup of various nations, possibly including my own. Future historians are gonna have a field day trying to explain it all, particularly since they’re going to be dealing with a veritable firehose torrent of info they’ll have to sift through to try and make sense of it.
The precedent seems to go the other way, for what its worth.
I think it boils down to “plain language” v “original intent”. My take: you go with plain language unless and until you encounter ambiguity that requires you to consult original intent to resolve the ambiguity (pretty much how statutes and legislative intent are handled). The plain language refers to crimes only. To the extent there is ambiguity around what constitutes a “high Crime or misdemeanor”, consult the original intent.
A recent article puts the argument I am opposing this way:
Saying that President should be impeached if he “reaches beyond the understood limits on his governing, or violates the constitutional requirement that the president “take care that the laws be faithfully executed” even if he committed no crime is purely political, grossly overbroad, and itself is inconsistent with history, which is replete with Presidents who have done exactly that and not been impeached. I see no way to stretch the language of the Constitution that far, given its specific reference to treason (a crime), bribery (a crime), and other crimes (high crimes and misdemeanors).
Abuse of power is just “reaches beyond the understood limits on his governing” with a wardrobe change. If your abuse of power doesn’t actually break a law, I don’t think its impeachable.
Nah, the president can be impeached for anything the House considers a “high crime or misdemeanor”. It doesn’t have to be any actual crime.
But if you want to remove the president from office, it helps if it sounds more serious than “didn’t admit to having an affair.”
Yep.
anything the House considers a “high crime or misdemeanor”.
If it wasn’t a crime when he done, treating it as one after the fact is unconstitutional (ex post facto )
“i’m still waiting to hear what crime he is accused of.”
I’ve recently seen a few articles around the web basically stating that ‘A president doesn’t have to commit a crime to be impeached’. So sounds like they’re becoming more honest and just outright saying ‘We can impeach you because we don’t like you’. Really interesting if that becomes precedent, from here on after we’ll see impeachment proceedings against the other party, 24/7, forever, or until we’ve devolved back into barbaric warring tribes, which will probably take a couple of more elections.
Meanwhile the same people are calling Barr’s investigations into their failed attempt at stealing and then overturning an election “illegitimate”.
That’s because they had a good reason and it was done in a dignified way.
Low Crimes and Felonies are not impeachable, you shitlord.
Squirrel!
Low Crimes and Felonies aren’t impeachable, you shitlord!
Bingo. They thought they had him dead to rights, jumped in with both feet before seeing the evidence, found they actually had jack all, and have been stalling desperately ever since hoping for *something* better to fall out of the sky.
“stalling desperately ever since hoping for *something* better to fall out of the sky.”
Sort of like Brexit.
You forgot obstruction. But so did the media after a month.
What does that even mean? It’s not a vote to hold an impeachment inquiry.
Shit or get off the pot.
Exactly and I think most people are in that same boat. Either do it or don’t. This is just to “formalize” the inquiry which still keeps the committee’s in secret IMO. It isnt impeachment proceedings.
But he’ll be grounded until after the election and his tweeter will be impounded, so there
Double secret probation.
No scrubbing your left eye!
Good lord, Salon really is in an alternate universe.
I like how they helped me understand who the bad men where by putting together a nice collage of them all looking stern and cold. I wasn’t sure what to think about them because all the words under the picture confused me.
/above average Salon reader
Yahoo! ran article where they ran the famous picture of Obama watching the raid on Bin Laden and the one of Trump with the other idiot terrorist in an attempt to show Obama was more Presidential.
Oh and this from De Blasio. Christ what an asshole.
https://news.yahoo.com/blasio-ordered-top-nypd-officers-150758663.html
“Good lord, Salon really is in an alternate universe.”
To be fair, if the source of an article isn’t given these days, I can hardly tell Salon from NYT or WaPo any longer.
Who was this guy? Dribble?
I don’t think the St. Louis County Police Department is going to have to worry about having a gay lieutenant any more.
They sure taught the taxpayers a lesson, didn’t they? ?
Sorry to hear about your loss. Even though letting them go is the kindest thing to do, it’s also one of the hardest things to do.
Ever since my first, I’ve described it as the hardest best decision to make. For me it’s always been about the dog’s quality of life. Loki’s was about gone, and would only have gotten worse. He was my 7th dog, it’s always hard when they go.
It was good to get that stuff off my chest.
It was a good epitaph.
I don’t recall being informed either, which would be about as relevant.
MARGARET BRENNAN: What is your reaction to the death of al-Baghdadi?
SUSAN RICE: Obviously, it’s a major milestone and it’s one we all should be welcoming quite plainly, but it doesn’t mean that the fight against ISIS is over. And it doesn’t mean that we can declare mission accomplished and just walk away. What we’ve seen time and time again in this part of the world is that when the pressure is relieved on terrorist organizations, whether al-Qaeda or ISIS, they are able to reconstitute. So we need to be vigilant. We need to maintain a minimal presence in order to ensure that the pressure stays on ISIS and they don’t come back roaring.
MARGARET BRENNAN: Was President Obama informed of the death of al-Baghdadi by the administration? Did you know before the news today?
RICE: No, there’s no reason why I should know. There is a tradition of common courtesy of presidents informing their predecessors of things of significance like this. Since the White House seemingly didn’t feel it necessary to inform the leadership of the intelligence committees on a bipartisan basis, I’m quite confident that they didn’t do the normal protocol with respect to predecessors either.
Strange. It’s almost like Barry ain’t the CnC no more.
I have no idea if the “protocol” is real. If it is then I have no idea why it exists.
No – we had to go tell Jimmy Carter first.
“There is a tradition of common courtesy of presidents informing their predecessors of things of significance like this.”
Really?
Didn’t Obama claim ISIS was on the run or defeated? I forget.
“The Jv squad.” …
Junior varsity.
I think he made that claim about Al Qaeda
No, it was Isis.
Also, the 1980s called; they want their Cold War policy back.
What a maroon.
At least not until we can arm their replacements.
They didn’t inform the intelligence committees because the Dems would have leaked it just to own Trump.
Rice is nothing more than a paid liar. She’s one of the more despicable characters from the Obama administration.
We need to maintain a minimal presence in order to ensure that the pressure stays on ISIS and they don’t come back roaring.
What an idiot. Nothing like a minimal presences to put pressure on ISIS. Sounds like Kerry and his “pinprick” retaliatory airstrikes, that Assad wouldn’t even notice.
Good lord, Salon really is in an alternate universe.
An alternate universe with its own physics and math which are completely different than ours.
The grieving monkey:
We once had a cat who adopted us. She was the neighbor’s, but the neighbor neglected her and we did not. She got pregnant, as unspayed cats are wont to do. She had the babies on the neighbor’s back porch, which had jalousy windows (really—why would ANYBODY put jalousy windows in a house in the midwest?!) and then one day soon after, she brought them to our back porch (we had a cat door for her). One by one. My mom was irritated and told me to take the kittens back to where she’d had them. Kelly (the cat) and I went around a couple of times and I guess she gave up.
That night, a tom came and slaughtered them all. Kelly was torn to shreds, but she lived. The really bad part was how sad she was and that her milk pooled in her belly and it looked like she swallowed a dinner plate as it finally dried up and went away. So she was very sad AND in pain. My mom felt so bad. She figured she should have known by the urgency Kelly showed trying to get them into the house.
“That night, a tom came and slaughtered them all.”
WTF? It’s not he’d have to pay child support.
Sexual differentiation really produces some very disturbing behaviour in many species, not just humans.
Just yesterday, a male lion tried to mutilate my testicles.
You teabag AFTER you kill them!
So he was slaying pussy… ///inappropriate ///humorishowicope
*glares balefully*
Having a bale of hay in your eye has to be painful.
Oy. That’s terrible. At least your mom had the good graces to feel bad.
I’m glad your eye is better, Brett. I had a weird cornea problem a few years ago that required the use of some crazy-expensive steroid drops. When the pharmacist told me the price, I laughed and told him to forget it. Then i called the doc and asked for a couple of those small sample bottles they start you with.
Even the doc was shocked at the price.
By the way, the theory was that my eye reacted to the chemicals in the solution I was using. Switched to dailies after that and finally just bit the bullet and got LASIK.
I should get lasik. I’m just very squeamish about someone cutting into my eyeballs with a laser canon.
If they screw up one eye, you can stop them before they do it to the other eye. And then sue.
It was simple and fast. I wish I had gotten over my squeamishness a LOT earlier.
I bet it feels apocryphal.
It’s good your eye is working.
President Trump left the safe bubble of his properties and his rallies to venture out into a world where people don’t cheer ecstatically whenever he appears. He attended the fifth game of the World Series on Sunday night at Nationals Park in Washington, and was lustily booed by the crowd, some of whom also held up impeachment banners and chanted “Lock him up.” Trump is not used to that sort of thing and he had a hard time hiding his discomfort.
Nationals Park in Washington… so…. the crowd was all government employees that are worried he might drain the swamp? We know he won’t.
I’m sure they were hustled out for the political displays, right?
They were banned, apparently.
The batter got to second base without even having to hit the ball!
“Trump releases a picture of the ‘wonderful’ dog injured during the al-Baghdadi mission that the president says did a ‘GREAT JOB’ in killing the ISIS leader – as sources claim his name is ‘Conan’
Military officials have not officially released the dog’s name, saying it was classified and they are ‘protecting the dog’s identify’.
Al-Baghdadi detonated a suicide vest that killed himself and three children after he was cornered by U.S forces in a dead-end underground tunnel in his Syrian compound on Saturday.
The blast apparently wounded the dog.
U.S. Joint Chiefs of Staff, Army General Mike Milley, said the dog ‘performed a tremendous service’ and is now recovering.
The dog has since returned to duty at an undisclosed location.”
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7623043/Wounded-dog-job-tracking-Islamic-State-leader.html
They couldn’t at least give the dog a day off?
Day off? The little d00d oughta get cashiered out and retire in honour and glory.
So much ^^this.
The dog should get his 72 bitches.
Wait, is that dog appearing in black face?
That picture of that Belgian Mallnois named ‘Cairo’ is bad ass.
“Al-Baghdadi detonated a suicide vest that killed himself and three children after he was cornered by U.S forces”
So, the only question is, did that cancel his 27 virgins? Or is there at lease a consolation prize, like maybe 3 camels?
And he’s bottom.
“Robert Evans dies aged 89: Hollywood legend who produced Chinatown and The Godfather, starred in The Kid Stays In the Picture and was once married to Ali McGraw passes away”
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7622823/Robert-Evans-dies-aged-89-Hollywood-legend-produced-Chinatown-Godfather-passes-away.html
Did he beat the shit out of Ali like Steve McQueen?
There was a cartoon show about him that lasted only one season. It was hysterical.
Loved his breakfast sausages.
“‘I never claimed I was perfect. I’m hurt. I’m angry.’ Katie Hill issues video statement saying she is going to fight ‘revenge porn’ after quitting over revelation she was in a ‘throuple’ with one aide and being probed over alleged affair with another
The now former Democratic congresswoman for California’s 25th district, just north of Los Angeles, blamed her actions on her ‘abusive husband’ and claimed the ‘right-wing media’ helped provide him a stage to enable his abuse of her.
‘This coordinated campaign carried out by the right-wing media and Republican opponents, enabling and perpetuating my husband’s abuse by providing him a platform is disgusting and unforgivable,’ she said in the video.
‘I will not allow my experience to scare off other young women or girls for running for office. For the sake of all of us we cannot let that happen,’ Hill seemed to say through choked back tears.”
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7623095/Im-hurt-Im-angry-Katie-Hill-says-going-fight-revenge-porn-quitting-Congress.html
Because Rush Limbaugh snuck into your office and stole your clothes?
Sticking to the vast, right-wing conspiracy angle? Who does she think she is, a Clinton?
Read this on another forum, a VRC no doubt.
“I see the white supremacists and gutless pukes forced out a D Congress person through revenge porn.”
“Who does she think she is, a Clinton?”
I have to assume that there’s going to be long trail of dead bodies left in her wake before she can strive for that.
I hope she resigned not because of her sexual proclivities, but because she was banging someone who worked for her.
She resigned because she’s not in a safe (D) district.
She resigned because she was caught.
Then again, people get caught and don’t resign.
Ilhan is all kinds fucked up and she’s not being pressured to resign.
Gee….I wonder….why?
Because you’re totes racist? Also a Shitlord?
This coordinated campaign carried out by the right-wing media and Republican opponents
So you’re saying it’s a vast, right-wing conspiracy.
Oh FFS, lady. You’re a horndog and you got caught doing horndog things (plus you STUPIDLY let people photograph you doing horndog things). Crawl under a rock and out of the public eye like you’re supposed to.
And the horndog general public was all, “Yeah baby! Let’s see some pho-tos.” Sure, the GOP was probably happy about the scandal’s publicity, but it was more TMZ-type stuff than political conspiracy.
Yeah, she should resign for being dumb. Don’t take pictures of yourself doing things that you want to keep a secret.
Lest she not have any poontang to chase.
“In fact, I’m willing to help out any of you young women looking to get ahead.”
And you get what you give….
Just the tip?
Wait, was this photoshoot recently or thirty years ago like when Roy Moore asked a teenager on a date?
Recent
I remember when unsealing divorce records was fine because (D) for Obama, but this is beyond the pale.
This is dirty but normal in politics.
I’m sure Lurch’s endorsement will seal the deal.
https://twitchy.com/dougp-3137/2019/10/26/how-do-you-know-john-kerry-says-evidence-supporting-trump-impeachment-more-powerful-than-what-they-had-on-nixon-and-people-have-questions/
I’ve heard rumblings that Kerry had his frankenfingers in the Ukraine cookie jar as well.
I hope that’s true.
China.
Yes. Either his son or his step son iirc.
I forget what Howie Carr used to call him. The lazy gigolo or some such.
He’s the best at lampooning New England liberals and the Kennedys.
Keating 5 don’t know when to quit.
Good grief, I sat down to read this and two seconds in a lash fell into my right eye which immediately had me itching, scratching and watering up to the point I couldn’t read. I had hell getting it out. Whoever pulls the strings in this universe has a twisted sense of humor.
I am so sorry to hear about your dog Shirley. That’s a tough one.
I hope this helps. A new life began today. I just got back from the vet a couple of hours ago. I have two strays that have showed up here. One is a top-shelf Belgian Malinios. She is young, been spayed, shots, the whole nine yards. very smart, affectionate and obedient. I can’t find who she belongs to but I wont have trouble finding a home for her. The other is a 4-5 mo old puppy. The most mutty looking mutt you ever saw…very generic light brown dog. I will never find a home for him so I guess I am stuck with the little squirt. Off to the vet we went…shots, worming, exams etc. He is very shy and passive, scared of people (probably has been abused). The little dummy doesn’t know it yet but he has won the dog lottery. My dogs live better than most people do. He will get used to couches and gravy. His life of privation and danger is over. He will probably outlive me.
Hooray, dogs! I hope you have much better luck with this fella!
aw I wish I could take the Malinois from you. I’ve wanted one since Bear (the Dog) on Person of Interest. (but now everyone will want one because of the Good Doggo who got Baghdadi)
I would be happy for you to have her but no idea how to go about doing that. I am in Louisiana. Where are you?
Good for you!
I got Loki being in search of a big galoot, not too concerned with breed standards. (Silken Windhound)
He fit the bill, and then some. It’s going to be a colder lonely night tonight.
“Feminist Wine Aunts vs Bernie Sanders”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1pfM4WcqL9A
https://twitter.com/shoe0nhead/status/1188823191445295112
As much as I stan Shoe, I’d gladly launch Sanders and Warren into the sun.
Well yeah, you’re doing humanity a favor.
But what about the sun?
Get your racist jokes now before the progs outlaw comedy once and for all! From the net:
“What did Ilhan Omar‘s husband say to her when he caught Ilhan cheating on him?
I’m going to tell dad!!”
Another psycho chick.
https://www.foxnews.com/us/woman-boston-college-boyfriend-texts-suicide
Well that’s pretty fucked up.
Teacher: You!
You: Yes?
Teacher: Not you!
You: Why?
Teacher (points to student next to her): No! YOU!
Student: Me?
Teacher: Yes you!
You (sighs): What?!
Too soon?
He’s on second.
You suck
Tough crowd.
One more reason to hate MLB.
https://dailycaller.com/2019/10/28/gerrit-cole-world-series-flashing-mlb-banned/
Second that Chafed. Baseball is not improved by refusing those breasts.
Generally if a woman bares her breasts to you, you invite them back….give ’em a lifetime pass. You don’t ban them. Good lord, how stupid.
Meh, attention whores trying to pimp their ‘brand’ fuck ’em.
fuck ’em.
Well, from the pictures I’ve seen, if you won’t you’re probably really, REALLY gay.
*standard disclaimer* NTTAWWT
They aren’t being banned for flashing, they are being banned because they didn’t pay the vig.
Seems like they are getting exactly what they set out to.
How is MLB going to enforce the ban? Maybe every ticket purchaser with a good rack will have to be “screened properly” before being allowed in the ballpark?
And what will they do if these two decide to “identify as men” in the future?
BREAKING: Max Boot is an Asshole
https://twitter.com/SethAMandel/status/1188895639322710016
That’s not breaking. That wasn’t breaking 3 years ago. That’s like something you read in the deep archives of a news site.
Breaking in 2016.
One might notice that the Trump haters all seem to have some commonalities. 1) War mongers and 2) Swamp critters
Boot is one of the worst war mongers we have.
New Deadspin owners to Deadspin: stick to sports
oh won’t someone think of the poor, put upon writers, being told what to do in exchange for a paycheck. Its unconscionable that they can’t just do whatever the fuck they want on this sinking ship!
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EH7G9CEXUAAnjao.png
WTF?
Tom likes the chubby ones, not my thing but can’t fault him for being a player.
Plus, he’s a better comedian than I remember. The punchline at the end was delivered with great timing, which is pretty hard to do when delivering text.
Well, ok then.
“Don’t bring Streisand. Too freaky.” <—- Oh? So many questions…
https://twitter.com/klara_sjo/status/1188480784455340032
It’s like poultry in motion.
Nice footwork. Would peck.
Paging Swiss!
Geese suck. That’s why I shoot them.
I’m geesing that assault was not unex-peck-ted.
Ugh…getting ready for a corporate dinner with definitely non-glib, non-shitlord cow-orkers. Any small talk suggestions? //terrible at small talk
Religion and Politics.
I’ll start off with pros/cons of circumcision. That should cover both, thanks.
“How ’bout them Knicks?”
Start with a description of the worst rash you have ever had.
Then just see where it goes.
Good luck!
Pick something no one else cares anything about, like stamp collecting. Relate every conversation that comes up to stamps. Them: “Oh, I just found out my daughter has cancer.” You: “That reminds me of the commemorative stamps the USPS did for breast cancer research. Did you daughter have breast cancer? You should buy some of those stamps. Tell you what, I’ll send you some links right now on where you can get them.”
After 5 minutes of this, you won’t have to make any small talk with anyone there.
Hi guys, I was cooking last night, making some chicken breasts. I had spilled some soda on my pants, so I was cooking without pants on. I was moving some trays around and I accidentally dropped a chicken breast on the floor. But it hit my penis before it hit the floor.
This morning my penis seems like it is inflamed and the peehole hurts if I touch it. Is it possible I got salmonella poisoning?
I don’t think it was the chicken breast that caused that.
We all know you were really fucking a chicken. Take some fish antibiotics (flex forte), you’ll be fine.
https://www.allivet.com/p-2389-fish-flex-cephalexin.aspx
The way you were dressed, you were asking for it.
Chinese bird flu. Exact same symptoms that my neighbor had, only he’d been bit by a Canada goose or was it a goosed Canadian?
*ahem* Hate Bird, the Bird That Hates.
You are needed one comment up.
*makes a note. Never eat at DOOMco’s house*
Dear Glibertarian Forum, I never thought this would happen to me….
Fuck marry kill game?
“Have you heard the word of Jesus Christ lately?”
Have you…from JC lately?
Talk about abortion.
Or imitate a VSCO girl.
Or both.
Save the ?s.
Show off your firearms knowledge. That shuts non-shitlords up real quick.
“Gen. Mazlum tells @NBCNews Kurdish intelligence helped track down ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi by stealing his used underwear and a sample of his hair to test for DNA, and that US intelligence confirmed a match months ago.”
https://twitter.com/RichardEngel/status/1188867567349391361
This was a Kurdish fraternity?
That’s so funny it has to be true.
I’m imagining a bunch of our finest special ops ninjas executing an elaborate plan to acquire and exfiltrate . . . used underwear.
Wasn’t there some plot to kill Fidel by poisoning his underwear? I’m sure the Clinton Crimefamily has some really weird techniques.
There was definitely a plot to poison his cigars. See Bay of Pigs by Eric Wyden. The shame is that it didn’t succeed.
Step 3… Assassinate!
“DOG UPDATE: The dog who aided the ISIS raid has an invitation to the White House “whenever he can get over here,” per senior official. The president wants to meet him.”
https://twitter.com/katierogers/status/1188924605672624131
Dog 2024
Replacing Pence with that dog would definitely put him over the top. Ups assassination risk though.
Our idiot military will undoubtedly spends tens of thousands on a flight just to get the mutt to DC.
NOTHING LEFT TO CUT!
Headline: “Trump Exposes Identity of Covert Operative”
I’m a little puzzled, myself, on how publishing the photo, but not the name, is protecting the dog’s identity.
Of course, why the dog’s identity needs to be protected is a whole ‘nother question. Do they think ISIS is going to track him down here in the states and kill him?
Actually was to protect the dog’s family
I fainted looking at that eye pic on the homepage, and I’m not particularly eye-squeamish!
Don’t mess with the Eagle!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KV6xSpWxjis&feature=youtu.be&fbclid=IwAR1ACOnO2DoMBMBejadWV8qWfFF9YKmEOa5zZKqGT8M3xcYQ0EdafPCKAF8
I need some input of the male variety (now that the euphemisms are out of the way…)
There’s a dude I have a crush on. There are a couple of reasons why I won’t approach him directly*, so I’ve been on a campaign to get him to notice me. It’s been going pretty much according to plan, and the end of the plan is in 5 months when I take a trip for my birthday to his home base.
Well, come to find out he will be in Boston in a couple weeks. I told myself that if he were to be stateside on the East coast, I’d introduce myself in person. It may seem stalker-ish, but it’s normal for him. When he was in LA a few weeks ago, a bunch of people went to meet him (someone flew in from Phoenix).
Anyway, I’m kind of balking at going to Boston. My original plan was that I would have 6 months to make myself cuter than usual to meet him on my birthday trip. Now that he says he’ll be there in a couple weeks, I’m suffering a crisis of confidence. I’m very much in a great place mentally – I’m feeling fucking amazing, actually. But physically I could use some work.
So, let’s just say I go to Boston slightly fat. What do I do to..I dunno…get his attention in a romantical/flirty kind of way? I’m absolute trash at flirting. Most men think I’m not interested in them because I’m straightforward and just talk to them about normal shit.
Like, what gets your attention in a woman? This is a guy I’m pretty serious about wanting to get to know (and, let’s be honest, I want to see him naked too). Feel free to snark (“show him your tits”), but some serious advice is most welcome. I’ve got it bad for this guy.
*Just trust me on this – I’m no shrinking violet. The reasons are…reasonable.
(OMFG – sorry about the wall of text. Was trying to be brief)
Dear Ken,
I never thought this would happen to me….
Show up naked, bring beer?
+1
Also, it won’t be just me and him. There will be at least 1 other person there.
So?
Oh, right, you’re not a congres critter.
Soooooo many responses I’m gonna keep myself from actually making. Dammit.
More seriously, it’s been so long since any woman tried to get my attention (decades) that I can no longer remember what worked. Sorry.
What sort of situation is this? Like a dinner, or something else? The venue often gives some angles, while taking others away. Not that I’m any *good* at this, mind you, but I kinda get some of the theory (and have man parts, though being rather atypical my opinions may not be relevant).
He’ll be working. His work involves interacting with the public much of the time. People often go and watch him work.
Fuck it…he hosts a livestream aviation channel on Youtube. He films at airports and gives commentary. His fans often show up to do planespotting alongside him and get selfies with him.
And if any of you know who I’m talking about, I will fucking kill you with extreme prejudice if you say anything about anything.
OK, yeah, I think Mojeaux’s comment nails most of the good ideas I’d have had. So go with that.
Um, talk about airplanes and go from there?
KK and planeboy sitting in a tree
Fingers crossed!! 😉
Smile. That always caught my eye.
I agree with this. I know chicks hate to be told to smile, but it sure as hell gets my attention and automatically conveys a couple of coolness points.
TBH, I’ll probably be smiling like a motherfucking idiot. Probably will literally LOL from pure fun/excitement, too.
I should add that he knows my personality a bit, because I occasionally livestream from the plane spotting location at DCA (Reagan National). I did a livestream last Friday that he watched and actively commented on. He rarely, if ever, watches other people’s livestreams.
Anyway, during my livestream last Friday, I got Marine 1 during the show and was fucking laughing like a hyena.
Here’s a clip (when I say “Hey Jerreeeeeee” – that’s him)
https://drive.google.com/file/d/16gY9JpAwQd5GljXqSKlPo3_G4eQFbk-a/view?usp=sharing
Yes. Along with eye contact. But no crazy eyes.
Yeah, none of this.
So about this smiling business.
IMO, it’s not enough to just smile. It needs to be genuine. Also, laugh. Be open.
(look at the clip I posted up there ^^ – I laugh just from pure excitement)
I will when I am in a position to watch a vid. ?
Throuple? I’m going with throuple.
The ultimate goal is to get him to initiate personal contact. As of now, he knows who I am (see above about The Plan), bubt we have no personal, off-line interaction.
I believe that’s the right approach. I’m a fan of Amy Alkon, “The Science Advice Goddess.” She bases her advice on behavioral and other scientific research, she’s straightforward and funny, and she’s a redhead, so she must know somethin’. My understanding of one of her basic premises is that neither men nor women have really gotten past the behavior patterns of our cave-dwelling ancestors. Pertinent to your situation, I believe Amy would point out that men still prefer to be the pursuers.
Will he be doing his thing in Boston in a setting where others may also come to watch him? If so, that may be your opening to do the same…as long as you aren’t traveling clear across the country. That would be a bit weird. It may be that all you can do is approach him in that setting to introduce yourself, ask pertinent questions, speak knowledgeably about common interests, and mention that you’ll be traveling to his home base in X weeks/months – can he recommend things to do/see, where to stay/eat etc.
That’s all I got. Or you can write to Amy. Even if she doesn’t use your letter in a column, she’ll probably send a personal response. (I got one years ago.)
That’s awesome – thank you! I’ll be travelling from DC to BOS, so not that far. I never even considered meeting him when he was in LA – that would be too much. It is very normal for his fans to show up at his filming locations. No idea if anyone except the “fixer” that he’s working with will be there. It’s Boston in November, so not exactly Toulouse in August (he gets a lot of fans when he goes to Toulouse and Manchester)
Mr. Mojeaux says—
Casually ask him what he likes to do away from work, what type of music he listens to, determine his outside interests. There are tones of voice you can use to convey that you’re just being polite, but also listening to his answers.What are his hobbies, what does he like to do for fun, what kind of food does he like (“Oh, hey, there’s an X place right over there.”)? Stuff like that.
“If she starts asking him about things that are not work related, that might be his first clue that she might have more than a work interest.”
Also, he agrees with showing up naked and bringing beer. ?
This is advice I can use!!!
I do know he likes to golf, and that he used to work in motocross and bmx.
If he used to work in motocross, then he’s probably brain damaged like my neighbor. And he probably has some scars he can show you.
Scars, you say…?
I would agree. Look for common interest and see if there is a connection. If there is, there is no reason you can’t ask if he wants to do something outside of work with you. If he doesn’t ask first. Most importantly, be yourself, because you’re awesome.
Why ask straight guys how to pick up guys? We know nothing. Ask a straight woman or gay man.
OH HEEEEYYYYYYYYY!!!
I have a book.
LOL
Guys who pull some of those corny moves on me just make me roll my eyes.
An ex-girlfriend of mine had that book.
I think it is a mixed bag.
Good advice from Mojo and others. You’ve obviously got a huge crush on him, so unless he’s reaaaallllyyy slow on the uptake I’m guessing he’ll figure it out.
Just be good natured and smart. If he doesn’t bite on that then it wasn’t going to work anyway. Consider the bullet dodged. If he does then he is probably the one.
You don’t have to act interested, just be glad to see the guy. That usually works wonders.
Ask him what is the aviation equivalent of motorboating and to demonstrate.
Assuming it is appropriate then touch him. A light hand on the forearm, knee, shoulder, whatever indicates something more than being an amiable acquaintance.
I just caught up on everything from over the weekend and wanted to offer belated well-wishes to Evan. I’m glad to hear your surgery went well and I hope you have a speedy recovery.
I’ve been a lurker for a while (started on TOS in late 2016 and followed you guys over in the migration). I really appreciate this site, thank you all for making it such an interesting place, and thanks Mojeaux for getting me to come out from lurking.
Fuck off, Tulpa!
Aww, thank you!
Least I could do.
“and thanks Mojeaux for getting me to come out from lurking.”
She’s the worst you know?
Fuck off, Tulpa!
Thank you!!!
Welcome! And fuck off, Tulpa!
Thanks!
Welcome, Tulpa! And fuck right off!
Thanks KK!
Obligatory:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yHzh0PvMWTI
Haha. I’ve never actually seen the godfather, although I knew the quote. Cannoli was my nickname in high school because it was a pun on my last name.
!!!!
(I have hated every mafia movie I’ve seen except the Godfathers I & II – they’re in my top all time)
Dafuq? Never seen Goodfellas?
Oh, and Fuck Off Cannoli tulpa!
I’ve seen Goodfellas and Miller’s Crossing. I do want to check out Prizzi’s Honor, though. I had no idea it was a comedy, so I avoided it.
Yeah, what they said. Tuplae and fucks all around.
More hot/crazy.
https://www.foxnews.com/us/texas-woman-fractures-mothers-skull-crucifix
She’s got a good heart. In a jar on her dresser.
Them are skary eyez.
I think I peed a bit.
Pouty lips and knows how to handle 10″
Did y’all see Dave Chapelle’s comments at the Kennedy Center? Lej. Absolute unit.
Yeah, he’s the man.
Got a link?
TW TOS
https://reason.com/2019/10/28/dave-chappelle-second-amendment-is-just-in-case-the-first-one-doesnt-work-out/
https://www.usatoday.com/story/entertainment/celebrities/2019/10/28/dave-chappelle-receives-mark-twain-award-prize-kennedy-center/2482692001/
So Suthen got a Belgian Malinios, and the hero dog is Belgian Malinios, and I never even heard “Belgian Malinios” until today.
It’s a German Shepherd dog who likes pale wheat beers.
?
They seem to be replacing GSDs in a lot of police departments. Great dogs, slightly smaller and not yet over bred.
Little less likely to have hip problems too.
Not as good at following orders, but less aggressive, too
Yep, she is a fantastic dog. I wish I could keep her but I cant.
I accidentally got Mr. Mojeaux ranting about the Chiefs game yesterday. Oy.
If our D could catch… well they probably wouldn’t be playing D.
Rodgers threw it to one of our guys at least 3 times.
Shorter Mr. Mojeaux:
* Nobody is giving the Chiefs any credit for doing a good job yesterday since practically the entire team is now 2nd and 3rd string.
* Reid punted twice on 4th down (AS HE ALWAYS DOES IF IT DOES NOT INVOLVE MAHOMES) when he should’ve gone for it.
* QBs 1 & 2 are both hurt. Reid called up a former QB who hasn’t played in 2 years, who was coaching high school football like a month ago, and did a good job yestersay.
* 2nd/3rd string defense actually stepped up to the plate yesterday where 1st string has not because they all lean on Mahomes Magic.
Shortest Mr. Mojeaux: They did a good job for what they were working with.
Reid is a great regular season coach. Postseason, on the other hand…
You should hire Marvin Lewis, He’ll fix this!
Yep, just one playoff game with ol’ Marv and you will never again think Andy Reid is bad in the post season.
Denny Green let the clock roll into overtime on 3rd down in the NFC championship game.
John Fox had prime Peyton Manning, 35 seconds, and 2 timeouts vs. the Ravens and decided to take a knee to go to OT.
Oh, the Packers won? Dammit. It was tied last I saw.
Tell him to become a Packer fan.
I thought I had left my late evening code runs behind me when I went to law school
*twiddles thumbs while script pulls down entire company’s AD*
I’ve been on call after hours for work the last two weeks. Only a little HTML involved, but motherfuckers have been busy the last two weeks. Tonight is my last night til Thanksgiving week (I’m the juniorest and I don’t have a family, so I pretty much had to take that week).
Anyhoo, I feel your pain.
I’m putting together a report to go out to all of our R&D staff across the company, but it’s changing piece by piece with every layer of approval it goes through. It’s low pressure at this point because the hard work is done, but people don’t seem to understand that you can’t keep submitting changes on a weekly cadence and expect this to be released on time. That and all of our data sources are like freaking molasses. At least the LDAP server can be queried. Can’t say as much about our other source.
Just once I’d love to work for an organization where this wasn’t an issue
Here’s the winner. How can Babylon Bee ever top this one? I can’t stop laughing
THat one left me dead
13th century painting found in old lady’s house in France.
Stories like that tickle me.
Joan Coaston has been Tweeting about the NRA infighting and litigation. Do you think this is the end of the NRA? I’m not sure, but I would not be unhappy if they stepped aside in favor of organizations that actually do 2nd amendment stuff.
Most of you by now have hear me talk about Lilah and her battle with Epidermolysis Bullosa. There is now a book based on her available for preorder.
I also wrote and recorded a children’s song based on the book. Her mother and I are trying to find a way to make the song free with a pre-order. If we can’t find a way to do that, I’ll just make sure anyone who orders the book has a way to get it anyways.
It’s EB awareness week, so the timing is perfect . . . .please get a copy today if you have young kids or know someone who does.
OMWC . . .you can use it to lure girls to the van!
Taking a look!
Sassy Massie gets spam text from Yang 2020 https://twitter.com/RepThomasMassie/status/1188960662199984139