As OFFICIAL COMPTROLLER for this insane asylum I’m pleased to report that we held a meeting of the Supreme Council of Masters of the Universe and decided this year to disburse our excess funds to a pair of charities that we believe you, the filthy lumpen-proletariat, will really approve of.

Minutes ago (as of my writing this; God only knows when it will be published) we donated $500 to FIRE (the Foundation for Individual Rights in Education), which dedicates itself to fighting off the worst excesses of the Kampus Kommunist Kids and their lackey administrators. We also donated $1,000 to the Institute for Justice, which has done so much to fight the army of radioactive bears that have overrun the western 1/3 of our once beautiful continent.

Thank you all for continuing your generous donations, which makes all this possible.