“OK, Julián, we’re going to go back to prepping for the next debate,” his press coordinator said into the microphone as the embedded campaign reporter for Vox limped off the stage, pressing a bandage to his face.
“I’m ready,” said the small and shiny man. He was alone on a mock debate stage, standing behind a podium, intense lights glaring down at him, an audio track of a boisterous audience playing on the speakers above and around him.
“We’re going back to the question of abortions for transmen,” she said. His press coordinator was a beautiful Latinx transbinary womxe in a wheelchair named Mariana that he met on a recent campaign stop. He could barely hear the chug chug chug of the breast pumps suckling her testicles.
“You said,” she said, “That you supported free abortions for transwomen. Do you understand the issue with this statement?”
“Yes, I corrected myself on Twitter. Transwomen cannot get pregnant. Yet. Not until single-payer health coverage pays for womb transplants.”
“And what are transplants?” Mariana asked archly.
“Vegetables or fungi assigned at birth as animals,” Julián replied.
“Very good. Now tell me what you should have said in the first debate.”
“I support free abortions for transmen,” Julián said.
“Just transmen? Some non-binary individuals have uteruses. Do you not support free abortions for them?”
“Of course, I do!” Julián said, indignant.
“So?”
“I support free abortions for people with functional uteruses.”
“Functional? That’s awfully ableist.” Mariana rolled her wheelchair back and for emphasis.
“I support free abortions for anyone with a uterus?” Julián asked.
“Very good. Now, on to sexualities. How are these transmen and non-binary people who have uteruses getting pregnant?”
“Sex with men?” Julián speculated.
“Men? Transmen are men and they can’t get anyone pregnant,” Mariana snapped. She reached under her peasant dress and switched out one of the bottles on her testicle pump and packed the full bottle into a cooler.
“People with func– people with penises?”
“Yes.”
“Then I support free abortions for gay people with uteruses and non-binary people with uteruses who have sex with people who have penises.”
“Who said that the men with uteruses are gay? A transman and a transwoman could be in a completely heterosexual relationship.”
Julián looked up in the air and did some mental calculations.
“So a transman with a working…”
“Ableist!” Mariana snapped.
“Just let me work this out,” Julián said. “A transman with a working uterus and a transwoman with a working penis and testicles in a relationship are heterosexuals and I want to ensure the government pays for his abortion.”
“And some transmen and non-binary people have sex with cismen,” Mariana said.
“Gay cismen?”
“Not necessarily. A cisman that has sex with a non-binary person is a pansexual.”
“A person with a penis and a person with a penis having sex isn’t a gay relationship?” Julián asked, his smooth face wrinkling with the strain.
“Or a non-binary person with a uterus. That is also a pansexual relationship.”
“So a person with a uterus and a person with a penis can be in a heterosexual, homosexual, or pansexual relationship?” Tears began to roll down Julián’s cheeks.”
“Yes,” Mariana said impatiently. “A transman has a male uterus and a transwoman has a female penis. I don’t see what’s so hard for you to grasp. And don’t forget the bisexuals. That’s a big base for you to go after.”
“What about a non-binary person with a uterus and a non-binary person with a penis in a relationship? Are they gay or straight?” Julián asked.
“Neither and both. Again, they are pansexuals. One has a theyterus and the other has a themenis.”
“OK, I think I got it,” Julián said.
“About time,” Mariana groused. She stood up from her wheelchair, stretched and sat back down.
“I support free abortions for any trans or non-binary person with a uterus who has sex with any trans or non-binary person with a penis, regardless of sexual orientation,” Julián said and issued smile #3.
“What about rape?” Mariana asked. “Are you just going to forget about rape?”
Julián sighed heavily.
“I support free abortions for any trans or non-binary person with a uterus who has sex with or is raped by with any cis or trans or non-binary person with a penis, regardless of sexual orientation,” Julián triumphantly.
“Now in Spanish!” Mariana barked.
“Apoyo los abortos gratuitos para cualquier persona trans o no binaria con un útero que tenga relaciones sexuales o sea violada por cualquier persona cis o trans o no binaria con un pene, independientemente de la orientación sexual,” Julián said, rolling his R’s around his mouth like a rich toffee.
Mariana clapped thinly.
“OK,” she said, “Now that we have those three votes all locked up, let’s take a break and then practice your answers on Medicare for All Undocumented Dead Pets.”
Julián nodded and crossed to the chair on the stage and sat it in heavily. His head and hands and feet hinged open and the rats inside working the levers came pouring out.
What were we talking about?
Who do I sue for the 20-30 points of IQ and the large number of sanity points I lost trying to follow this?
THIS WAS EBIL!
I can’t even . . .
Will there be 23 more of these?
95. Keep up, shitlord.
It’s like painting the Golden Gate bridge, when your done you just start right back up again. All the rules will have have changed by the time SF is done with the first set.
By then Mariana will be unpersoned for some incomprehensible thoughtcrime and buried with xer wheelchair.
“About time,” Mariana groused. She stood up from her wheelchair, stretched and sat back down.”
HAHAHAHAHAHA
That’s where I LOL’ed as well. Masterful!
ditto
Almost worth throwing up over the testicle breast pumps.
Is SF patenting this concept? He should…
That sounds very painful.
It was amazing. Good thing I work at home.
Also my favorite part.
Mein Führer…I CAN WALK!
Awesome.
Exactly it right here.
That’s if those three are able to get themselves worked up enough to vote.
That perfectly encapsulates the thinking. There are very few Dems who will vote for him based on this social signaling.
This is the best ending EVER.
Yeah, that was a particularly good one.
That caught me by surprise…SF really can hit you from any angle.
::sphincter tightening involuntarily::
STEVE SMITH HELP LOOSEN SPHINCTER, BY HELP, MEAN…
Why does he look like Evil Sulu?
*requesting Evil Sulu’s sentient goatee*
Comes complete with working Agonizer.
Head.
Desk.
I need a drink.
I like it, we can fill in our own reasons as to the why.
1. The Julian rats gnawed on the reporter’s face.
2. Mariana threw a bottle from the testicle pump at the reporter.
3. totally incompetent but very woke stage hands rigged the whole stage wrong and a light fell on the reporter.
Mariana’s closed-hand slap.
He could barely hear the chug chug chug of the breast pumps suckling her testicles.
Third paragraph and he already hits it out of the park.
You sir, are a genius.
It isn’t the sharp lines but the subtle shading that makes a great painting.
“Men? Transmen are men and they can’t get anyone pregnant,” Mariana snapped. She reached under her peasant dress and switched out one of the bottles on her testicle pump and packed the full bottle into a cooler.
There is really just so much to admire in this one. The line I quoted is just the first one to make me guffaw.
“So a person with a uterus and a person with a penis can be in a heterosexual, homosexual, or pansexual relationship?” Tears began to roll down Julián’s cheeks.”
This is when I started laughing.
One has a theyterus and the other has a themenis.”
Beautiful.
“His head and hands and feet hinged open and the rats inside working the levers came pouring out.”
Bravissimo.
simplemente estupendo.
Who is Julian Castro? Some guy off the street?
Obama’s HUD Secretary, current no-hope Dem Presidential canidate.
Zenu comin’
Justin Trudeau’s real name?
+1 missile crisis
Sugarfree has an impressive grasp of the transman, transwoman and pansexual cisgender concepts. It’s almost encyclopedic.
It’s like Einstein’s ability to visualize/conceptualize quantum mechanical hypotheticals. Humanity will be robbed if SF’s brain is not also saved in an old mayonnaise jar filled with formaldehyde.
Make sure it’s labeled Abby Normal.
Screw that….I want it working
in a wheelchair named Mariana
And people think I’m weird because I name my cars.
People don’t name their cars?
Lots of unimaginative folks around. For example, my car is called “BMW”, my partner’s car is called “Honda” and our bear is called “Bear.”
So, ironic naming since you drive a Fiat and a Toyota?
my car is called “BMW”
So you’re saying you drive a beaner.
No, it’s ok. I’ll see myself out.
No. People who name their cars are strange.
Mine is called “Bitch magnet”….
You work for animal control?
You can say I kind of do that…. Wait. if the womenz are the ones tasked with taming the beast, am I still the one working for animal control?
Mine is called Pearly Girl. Tesla requires a name in the control panel, and Model 3 is boring.
I want to name my car, but I’m not sure how they identify yet.
“Subaru”
That deserves a standing ovation.
*ovates while standing*
The horror, the horror…
EXACTLY
I only name the ones that are worth naming. I didn’t name the ’95 Prism.
A transman and a transwoman could be in a completely heterosexual relationship.
This is . . . actually correct.
A little mindbending but correct.
That’s how one of the “pregnant man” stories came about. The people were trans, but obviously liked to play around with a more traditional fit up as well.
Many economists have applauded President Donald Trump’s desire to make Corporate America more competitive by lowering corporate taxes. However, the 2017 tax overhaul added to the federal deficit, sapping the government of revenues during a strong economy.
No, fuck you cut spending
“sapping the government of revenues during a strong economy.”
Keynesians say you should cut spending during good economy.
Right, I’d take applied as written Keynes right now over spending like a Powerball winner on meth that we have right now.
“I was the only non-Keynesian in the room.” — John Maynard Keynes
Lies.
But [counterfactual that holds human action constant]!
Exactly – the Fedgov collected record revenues following the tax cuts, so it’s not a revenue problem, it’s a spending problem.
HOW DARE YOU!
/votebuying scumbags
But it would have been even more if the rates were higher!
/same logic that cuts in the rate of increase are the same as actual cuts
Look, if I own a restaurant and make $50,000 a year selling cheeseburgers for $5.00 each, then if I just increase the price to $50 each I will make $500,000 a year! Because people don’t change their behavior based on cost.
*furiously calculates using ever larger multipliers*
Yes! I’ll be rich!
sapping the government of revenues
I thought revenues were up?
They are, to record levels. CNN is lying.
Shocking, I know.
They also informed me that the 2 weeks worth of groceries that is no longer being taken out of my check every month is “crumbs” and that the rich got a tax cut at the expense of the poor.
Hard to believe they are hemorrhaging viewers faster than a hemophiliac in a razor factory.
A quick look at the 2017 tax tables and my 2018 return informs me I would have paid $450 more if the tax reform hadn’t been passed. And I’m at the bottom of the ladder.
Vegetables or fungi assigned at birth as animals,”
Stop! You’re killing me with this literalism.
By the way, happy to finally see you use that artwork. I’m very proud of this design.
Hillary has been really disappointing these last few months. I know she’s keeping her head down with Epstein and busy lurking on the edges of the Dem primaries, posed to strike, but c’mon!
It’s too quiet. When she finally surfaces I suspect you will have material for months.
“News”week
OK… on to the fun.
Good one, SugarFree.
When Castro first made his remarks about transwomen getting abortions, I thought it was one of the fiscally responsible ideas to come from them this year.
Then I realized the doctors would probably remove prostate glands and claim them to be fetuses.
Well one clump of cells is like any other, right?
And the docs will actually perform a procedure, so they get to charge.
If Biden can keep from going down this rabbit hole, he’ll be the nominee. And if he can, he’ll also have a decent shot at beating Trump. Honestly, though, I really don’t think he’ll be able to resist the pressure from the rest of the pack and the woke media.
If I were a Democratic bigwig right now, I’d feel like Cassandra. I’d know exactly the script the Dems have to follow to have a decent chance. And every step of the way, the Dems are rejecting it.
If he survives the primaries, then we’ll get to read lots of “hold your nose and vote Biden” pieces.
Oh, I’m sure we’ll get a lot of “hold your nose and vote (whoever)” pieces no matter who wins the primaries. I just think Biden’s the only guy running who that might resonate for. Reparations, Medicare for all, open borders and free trans woman abortions up to birth, isn’t a winning platform. Even against Trump. And, in large part, the Trump “scary factor” has been dissipated. He’ll have been in office for almost four years at the time of the election. We haven’t seen Armageddon, we aren’t living in Nazi Germany. Biden can still play the “this guy is a loon” card, but only if he hasn’t signed on to his own loony agenda.
You haven’t seen Armageddon. Everyone with TDS sees a new Armageddon start every day when they wake up and look at CNN.
I kind of want Liz of the Fauxhicans to get the nom. The debates would be fun.
My money’s on her. She’s a woman, so that’s a thing, plus she yells a lot, which the kids like, but she has a “serious educated professional” image that’s important to the mainstream Progressives. Biden’s too male when you’ve got someone like her in the running.
She’s got the Nathan Phillips vote sewed up.
Every woman in my personal life who has opined on the subject of Elizabeth Warren has told me that they think she is a big fraud and fake who will fuck people over…. based on nothing more than her hairstyle and mannerisms.
Basically they say that she is trying to carry herself like a younger more desirable woman in a way that screams bunny-boiler.
And before you scoff at this seemingly superficial form of analysis, policy-wide Warren is basically a female version of Mussolini right down to the demagogic efforts to build a cult following that see her as a vital restorer of past national glories. Vanity was a huge component of Mussolini’s motivations, and I suspect vanity is playing a similar role in inducing Warren to follow in Mussolini’s footsteps.
Warren pings my radar for evil like none of the others. I’ve seen her type in academia too many times. She’d fuck over anyone for any reason as long as she got her way.
Hillary was the bumbling sort of evil, just an entitled shithead. Warren knows what is best for us, no matter how many she has to kill to make it come about.
I get that vibe, too.
And, at this point, I think she’s the likely nominee.
Her or Harris, maybe a double ticket. Sanders is a dead letter sideshow and Biden is far too old, male, white and electable to be acceptable to the Twitter crowd (who will end up not voting in the general anyway.)
Warren and Harris are the type of authoritarian shitheels that the moron left really craves: white mama to them them they are terrific and great and she only hits them when she thinks they really deserve it and black mama to add another hairshirt in their eternal self-excoriation over race, the last thing that gets them hard and wet.
The social signaling is a game of chicken. For the most part, the left doesn’t give a rat’s nail about transwhatevers. They care about being accused of not caring.
Bingo
Warren pings my radar for evil like none of the others.
*nods emphatically*
I had her textbook in my bankruptcy law class. It was fucking garbage because it was more a 500 page stump speech than a primer on bankruptcy law.
She is Woodrow Wilson with less humility and a giant vulva shaped chip on her shoulder.
I like the MAMA hat.
By the way, Castro really did qualify for the next clown car debate on July 30th and 31st. The debate organizers consider him a mid-tier candidate.
CNN is holding a live drawing tomorrow night to see who is on which night, based on a tier system of support in polling.
Read more, if you can: https://www.vox.com/2019/7/15/20691651/democratic-debate-2019-cnn-detroit-candidates-rules
They really want it to be a reality show, don’t they.
Make them live in the same house.
Real World: Detriot
“Who ate all the peanut butter again?!?” Pete yelled. “I was saving that for Elvis burgers!”
I think you found your next plot. This really is the best timeline for you, isn’t it?
I’m like a pig in slop.
Let’s put them on a boat…
https://www.tvguide.com/tvshows/shipmates/204363/
Chris Hardwick FTW.
Lol, Yang is middle tier? Bottom tier is fucked, sorry Gabby Apologist.
The DNC knows she’s the only one of them with (some) actual sane policy positions.
So not current year Democrat.
Is it me or are even the Dems pretty sure Trump’s got this one in the bag? It just doesn’t seem like the party’s sending out its best and brightest.
I get the feeling most of them are running for name recognition for 2024.
Who are the Dems best and brightest these days? It’s as short of a bench as the R’s.
“In rides Hillary to save the day!”
I’ve seen this suggested repeatedly, but I’m not sure I can buy it. Not that Hillary wouldn’t like to take another crack it, but I think there are enough highly-vocal leftists that would pull no punches if she tried to present herself as a savior, to sink her. Not a majority, but enough. Imagine the Feel The Bern-ers from 2016, but more of them, split into 16 factions, falling over themselves to call out all of Hillary’s (and Bills!) past indiscretions and failures. Particularly if the Epstein thing comes home to roost.
I think it’s quite the opposite. Current polling shows nearly any Dem beating Trump. The election is an eternity away in political time. But they love the polls and seem convinced their nominee will win.
The polls don’t matter.
Incumbent presidents have a massive advantage. Bush the 1st lost because he was actually running for Reagan 4th term and that just doesn’t happen. Carter lost because the economy was in a shambles, and he actively participated in making that happen.
Unless Trump does something to royally fuck the economy in 2020, he walks away with the election.
Pile of shit, big pile of shit, heap pile of shit.
“Reproductive justice”
Like the vulva is innocent until proven guilty in a court of law?
The penis shall not be subject to cruel and unusual punishment?
“The penis shall not be subject to cruel and unusual punishment?”
So does this criminalize “Bopping the baloney”? What about “Spanking the monkey”? “Choking the chicken”?
Beating the Bishop? Burping the Worm?
Badgering the witness? Celebrating palm Sunday?
Roughing the passer?
Coaxing out the yogurt? Mixing up some baby batter?
Going on a date with Rosy and her five sisters? Distributing free literature? Feeding the geese?
Punching the clown? Waxing the dolphin? Shootin’ puddy at the moon?
“Reproductive justice” = “all men have a right to equal distribution of quality poon”?
If you took their reasoning to it’s logical conclusion, that is where you’d have to wind up. It’s a pretty funny reality. Incels are merely applying social justice warrior reasoning to the dating scene.
“The penis shall not be subject to cruel and unusual punishment?0
I thought it was known that the penis is evil. Clearly guiltily until proven innocent.
Now that we have those three votes all locked up
Yup.
We pick on them, but all this stuff is tedious, tiresome and retarded.
Once again, the Dems confuse loudness for numbers. What was that recent poll, where people estimated that 10% of the population is gay/trans/LGBTQ, but the actual number is like 4%? Yet they’re going all in on this. Same thing with immigration and reparations. They ignore the numbers at their own peril.
And of that 4%, probably close to 95% are plain old boring cis-homos. When you get to trans, especially non-binary, women-with-penis types, we’re talking tiny fractions of 1% of the genpop.
And a certain percentage of that is because it’s the in thing right now. A lot of people would be regretting their life choices if teenage Members Only jackets and mohawks were non-reversible.
Also, fuck this current year autocorrect for marking “mohawks” as a misspelling.
This.
SF makes it entertaining, at least.
Also, I feel the need to point out that the rainbow flag above isn’t the new, inclusive one.
Of course, it’ll probably change again before the next article comes out, so no point in changing it.
The black stripe is for asexuals? And the brown is “only dates Indian software engineers?”
Representing green bodies and purple bodies wasn’t inclusive enough.
Green bodies? Like that Orion slave girl Kirk nailed?
Yellow is obviously for watersports enthusiasts.
OT: RIP Rutger Hauer
He was only built to live 75 years.
Someone warn Daryl Hannah!
Damn. RIP
If you’re a Jennifer Jason Leigh (of Fast Times at Ridgemont High) fan, make sure to check out the Rutger Hauer movie “Flesh+Blood”.
Love that movie!
It gave me my life-long dream of poisoning a well.
The bottom tier (5 on each night): Bennet, Bullock, de Blasio, Delaney, Gabbard, Gillibrand, Hickenlooper, Inslee, Ryan, and Williamson
And now I have that fraternity rush scene from Animal House in my head.
“This is the losers’ corner. Have a seat. Help yourself to the cookies and punch.”
I’m glad Sandra Bullock got in the race.
OT: Can individualism survive the new age of mob rule?
There is a 14% I may be getting some new stinkfinger later today, so that is my link contribution.
How are you getting that stinkfinger? Your own cavities don’t count…
Plying a recent divorcee with boxed wine. The tried and true ways work, young one.
Boxed wine? Amateur.
Boone’s Farm and it’s a sure thing.
https://youtu.be/0pK5HmuCMBM
Gee whiz Captain Classy she’s a 40-year-old divorcee, not a recent high school graduate.
Divorcee? Crusty knows the way. Quantity over quality.
Good God, you’re here Crusty!? Many happy returns.
As for the wine- Crusty is right.
Out through the night
An’ the whispering breezes
To the place where they keep
The Imaginary Diseases
Y’know, my python boot is too tight
I couldn’t get it off last night
A week went by, an’ now it’s July
I finally got it off
An’ my girl-friend cry
“You got STINK FOOT!
If one of those ridiculous right-wing news networks were smart they would steal this and hire some Hillsdale College graduates to re-write this into short YouTube sketches to own the libs.
Dread Pirate Boris
The Singapore-style tax-free zones favoured by Boris Johnson have been identified as a money-laundering threat by Brussels.
In a report on money laundering, the European commission named free ports for the first time as a concept “potentially vulnerable to money laundering or terrorism financing” in the European single market. “Golden passport” schemes promoted by some EU countries, professional football and private ATM machines were also put on the commission’s watch list, which totals 47 goods and services.
Free ports are “the new emerging threat”, said the European justice commissioner, Věra Jourová. “This is something we want to focus more on.”
Johnson, due to enter Number 10 on Wednesday, has said he wants “about six” tax-free zones in ports as part of his vision for the UK after Brexit. He has yet to spell out details on the pledge, including the size and location of the free ports.
——
Valdis Dombrovskis, the European commission vice-president in charge of financial services, said: “Today’s analysis gives more proof that our strong AML [anti-money laundering] rules have not been equally applied in all banks and all EU countries.
“So we have a structural problem in the union’s capacity to prevent the financial system [being] used for illegitimate purposes. This problem has to be addressed and solved sooner rather than later.”
The commission wants tougher enforcement, but also better coordination between national authorities’ financial intelligence units.
Brexit will lead to a massive pan-European crime wave. Better safe than sorry.
I’m sure their refusal to negotiate a new deal isn’t going to undermine their leverage with Johnson on the issue at all. HAHAHAHA!!
“So this is take it or leave it? OK.” *walks out*
Re: the last thread. Wikipedia considers Hong Kong and Macau to be countries.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_tariff_rate
See #180
This is sort of on topic, as Singapore is at #179 with an average tariff rate of 0.07%. I wonder what they have a tariff on?
Chewing gum.
Boom.
“Brexit will lead to a massive pan-European crime wave. Better safe than sorry.”
… As opposed to what they have now?
“Brexit will lead to a massive pan-European crime wave.”
Brexit was caused by global warming and then Brexit will cause more global warming… and… orangebadman.
“Free ports are ‘the new emerging threat'”
Someone is trying to circumvent our shakedowns! DESTROY!!
Taxes are….Beep…Taxes are… Does not compute…price…. civilization…. ERRNO: connection refused./NPC
“We’ve chosen the tax free zones. They cover all of the country except for the homes of people employed by the EU.”
Jackie Spierer (D-CA) “Mr. Mueller you are the greatest patriot in this room today.” FFS
Also, I see a cutaway joke to a sad Tom Brady…
faint praise being they are at a committee hearing for the house of reps.
Wasting 35 million taxpayer dollars on a hoax to try to overthrow the results of free and fair election = “patriot”.
Honk honk
I’m not sure there’s a word left in the English language that the left have not already redefined at least a few times. Nothing really has any true meaning anymore.
Clown World exemplified.
There’s nothing worse than an insincere ass kisser.
Check out Bruni’s latest fluff job in the NYT on the mule faced one. Just when you think that guy cannot get any more pathetic, he does just that. Hillary is like a sprig of parsley on a plate of salmon and Mueller is ‘frightening’. Where the fuck does this guy come up with this bullshit? I can’t believe anyone actually pays this guy to write.
Not Qualified
“I think one of the things I’m most concerned with is, Kamala Harris is not qualified to serve as commander in chief, and I can say this from a personal perspective as a soldier,” Gabbard told Clay Travis on the podcast “Outkick the Coverage.”
Gabbard argued that Harris has “got no background or experience in foreign policy, and she lacks the temperament that is necessary for a commander in chief. I’ve seen the cost of war firsthand. I’ve experienced the consequences of what happens when we have presidents, as we have from both political parties in the White House, who lack experience, who lack that foreign policy understanding, who therefore fall under the influence of the foreign policy establishment, the military-industrial complex.”
“This is what’s so dangerous. This is what we’ve seen occurring over time,” she said.
I say we let them work out this dispute in the honorable way: mud-wrestling match.
Two bitch enter, one bitch leave.
I’ve seen the cost of war firsthand. I’ve experienced the consequences of what happens when we have presidents, as we have from both political parties in the White House, who
lackhave experience, wholackhave that foreign policy understandingFify, tulsi
Julian Castro looks like a sex doll that was brought to life by black magic.
That could be the next episode of hat and hair, but with more nausea.
Wannafud?
If SF comes up with something more disturbing and succint than “wannafud?” …
You need something Dennis shaped to fill your hole?
That would be even funnier if it didn’t sound so much like something the leftards would actually come up with as issues.
Castro is questioning the senile drunk right now! The rats!
The knives are out for Tulsi
https://www.oregonlive.com/politics/2019/07/democratic-activists-worry-tulsi-gabbard-will-launch-third-party-presidential-run-to-help-donald-trump-win.html
Third parties help [my least preferred candidate] because [preferred candidate] sucks and can’t get anyone to vote for them other than not being [other guy].
Leon sums up the US political system in one quick sentence.
FYTW seems more to the point.
But we already have two big tent parties who are already all onboard with FYTW, no one else can steal their glory on that one.
That’s just silly. What they need to do is for everyone but the primary winner to form their own political party and run. There’s so many to choose from, The Democratic Socialist, the Social Socialist, the Totally Woke More Socialist, the … oh well, you get it. Then they will surely defeat badoranageman. And if they don’t, the special investigation will surely find collusion this time because no way badorangeman could beat all of those totally woke parties which all Americans agree with.
Ahem… the Whigs tried something like this once. It didn’t go well. They ran different candidates in each part of the country with the idea that when they won the electors would vote for the preferred part candidate.
But it’s totally going to work this time, right people in charge.
“My prediction: Tulsi runs as third-party Green candidate to help Trump win. I will take bets on this.”
It’s funny because the whole article is a hit piece on Tulsi, and what’s her sin? She’s popular on the right wing. So much so that many right wingers say they like her more than Trump. But that helps Trump?
many right wingers say they like her more than Trump
Its a funny kind of right winger who prefers a gun control and Green/Socialist New Deal candidate over Trump.
Well, it seems all in vogue for everyone, even those on the right, to signal their dislike of Trump. Does that mean they pull the lever for a commie? I don’t think so.
Yeah, people have to justify their actions to themselves some time. I knew a guy once who told me that he used to vote Republican until they got all aggressive on their anti-abortion stance. This was about 15 years ago. So he now voted Democrat despite supporting the Republicans on every other issue, apparently.
Or maybe it’s an indication of the left that anyone who is anti-war and not all in for identity politics is considered right wing.
I like the 2 pghs of parody thrown in at the end.
AND YEA, THE ANGELS SPOKE FROM ON HIGH TO CASTRO, THOU SHALT APPEASE THE DEMONS AND HARMFUL SPIRITS. DO NOT DISMAY, FOR THE LORD THY GOD IS WITH YOU.
Not sure I’d say the biggest in history, but it is a pretty big own goal.
https://twitter.com/asymmetricinfo/status/1154035337343070209
Credit to McArdle for putting it out there.
Now this is funny:
https://pjmedia.com/trending/twitter-reacts-to-mueller-claim-hes-not-familiar-with-fusion-gps/
He’s not familiar with the source of the dossier that provided the entire justification for the investigation? Maybe Muller is going senile.
I’m truly shocked at how badly this thing is going. I thought it would be a wash – some talking points for the left, some for the right. But wow.
During the portion I heard, Mueller sounded addled. The only time he had any force to his statements was when Schiff was feeding his lines to him.
John Gill in the Star Trek Nazi episode?
Perfect.
So the opinion pieces tomorrow are going to be about how Mueller owned the repubs?
I’m not following today’s fun but I assume he’s playing stupid here because his job was to bring down Trump, not to provide an accurate portrayal of the sequence of events or anything.
Well, his image as an upright and no-nonsense prosecutor has been thoroughly trashed, so there’s that.
How much of his bumbling was fake, I have no idea. But I suspect not all of it was. Regardless, he comes off as incompetent, and I’ll take that as a win. The bit where he said he might still indict Trump when he’s out of office was particularly choice, since he’s not a prosecutor any more.
This was most excellent entertainment. I wish I could share it with more people without being thought insane.
Go ahead and confirm their suspicions. It’s not like you have a security cleara-…. Nevermind.
OT: Liberty Doll on the NRA.
Picked up a 5lb bag of 50 individually wrapped peanuts snack size bags
https://imgur.com/a/AmKqv1F
Thanks USDA for those incredibly helpful numbers.
Dammit. Wrong post.
My head was spinning at all the combinations of derp but I laughed at the rats at the end.