I’m using SP’s computer to write this, and it’s weird, sort of like using someone else’s toothbrush. I shouldn’t be surprised at all the My Little Pony popups. Well, it’s better than her Barbie phase. Anyway, happy Wednesday morning, time to hump!

I can’t think of a segue from “hump” to “birthdays,” so I guess I’ll skip the foreplay, as usual.  And today’s birthdays include a quotable fellow; a rather acidic fellow; a memorial to how low Oberlin has fallen; a fellow with potential; everybody’s favorite parodist; and the Eddie Gaedel of the NFL.

Next, the news.

 

California’s gun laws pay dividends.

 

Baseball always entertains.

 

“The B Word.” Jesus fucking christ.

 

“I like beer.”

 

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

 

I really, really, really hope this is correct. Too late for us, but if it can really slow things down…

 

My new side gig.

 

I was wondering if this was parody, then I checked out a few of her other stories. Holy shit, I hope she’s not getting paid for this shit- it’s not only hilariously stupid, the writing would maybe qualify for a B in a sixth grade English class.

 

Now that’s some muscles that would make Warty jealous.

 

Old Guy Music features someone who destroyed her own career in a spectacular way. Really, who gives a shit about the sociopolitical and religious stances of entertainers? Apparently everyone except us. SP and I saw her live during our Austin days, and it was one of the most entertaining and energetic shows we’ve ever seen.