SOTU Open Thread

It’s going to be the best.Bigly speech. Not for losers. Comment so I can remember. I’m timing my second handle of vodka to start at 9pm.

Comments

302 responses to “SOTU Open Thread”

  1. Rebel Scum

    Well, he’s got the platitudes down.

  2. SugarFree

    White dresses? Why aren’t they dressed as Handmaidens?

    1. Count Potato

      They just forgot the hoods.

      1. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

        Is forgetting their hoods a recent event for Dems?

        I mean, they certainly talk like they have forgotten, although, their policies suggest they haven’t.

  3. Rebel Scum

    Florida Man, Programmer, and purveyor of links.

    So your skills are complete in the event you want to transition away from journalism.

    1. Brett L

      Bitch, I can for realz code. Like wrote shit when coding was hard and didn’t have all the helper shit.

      1. Sour Kraut

        Like Eclipse? I rather like Eclipse.

        1. Rhywun

          Guh. I hate Eclipse.

          1. Sour Kraut

            Compared to the standard tool of my trade, the Jupyter notebook, PyDev is a massive improvement.

          2. Rhywun

            Ah. I don’t use Python. Work is all Microsoft, baby.

  4. SugarFree

    Nancy is clearly playing Angry Birds behind those folders.

    1. Bobarian LMD

      Is that some kind of euphemism?

      1. Banjos

        ?

        1. AlmightyJB

          Lol

      2. juris imprudent

        Do you REALLY want him to explain?

  5. DEG

    I’m going to do something productive instead of watching the State of the Union. Something like go to sleep.

    1. AlmightyJB

      I picked up CZ-USA/Dan Wesson 2019 Catalog at store tonight. I’ll be in my bunk.

      1. Not Adahn

        Schmexy.

  6. Banjos

    Omg, the scowls from the shrieking harpy brigade is well worth watching this thing.

  7. totally_not_an_escaped_ai

    The Democrats sitting there like stone statues while Trump goes on about the good economy is not a good look for them.

    1. SugarFree

      Yeah, the sour look on their faces when Trump talked about people getting off food stamps spoke volumes.

    2. Banjos

      Republicans are happy and having a great time. The Democrats look like they all have sand in their collective vaginas. The optics aren’t great for Democrats. Would you rather be with the miserable cunts or the ones having a good time?

      1. Rebel Scum

        Did it look like this for Team Red when Barry was giving his addresses? (Those were still my formative years.)

        1. Brett L

          More or less

          1. hayeksplosives

            The “You lie!” outburst directed at Obama by some congressman was one of the greatest parts of that presidency.

            Obama lecturing the Supreme Court at the State of the Union speech soon after they made a ruling he didn’t like was a new low for the State of the Union speeches.

          2. Rebel Scum

            I remember that.

          3. Chafed

            It was indeed. I was very disappointed not one of them walked out.

        2. Banjos

          I don’t remember. The only thing I remember from that time was the right being petty and counting how many times Obama said “I” and the media flipping out over someone saying “you lie”.

          1. hayeksplosives

            Yeah. I was just typing about the “You lie!”

            He was right, you know.

          2. Banjos

            Absolutely. My God, Obama was such a smug little shit.

          3. MikeS

            Oh, he still is.

            I hope I’m crazy, but I have this gnawing dread that we aren’t done with him yet. Or rather, he’s not done with us yet…

          4. Akira

            You know Obama will never leave the limelight. He loves it too much. He lives for it.

            He’s going to have his dumbass show on Netflix, and even after he dies, we’ll have to suffer a decade or so of Democrats naming every single highway overpass after him.

            At least there will be some comic value when cities have a “Barack H. Obama Memorial Blvd” and they are all ghetto shitholes with regular gunfire and syringes on the ground.

          5. The Last American Hero

            You think it stops there? There will be a colossus of him straddling the Potomac before I die. I called it in 2008.

        3. Bobarian LMD

          Almost to a tee. Alito called out ‘Not True” when he mischaracterized the campaign finance decision and Joe Wilson (at a joint session) called out “You Lie!” when he lied about ObamaCare.

          1. MikeS

            The Joe Wilson thing was so scandalous and much tongue clucking. Yet now it’s tote’s OK for sitting congressmen to call the sitting president a traitor and for “senior” senators to dress like hookers on the senate floor.

          2. MikeS

            I know that politicians have thrown much worse at each other in the past (look up the election of 1828), it’s just the hypocrisy that gets me.

      2. Raphael

        Misery does love company after all.

  8. AlmightyJB

    Is everyone tired of winning yet?

  9. Rhywun

    You people are sick for watching that shit.

    1. Breet Pharara

      I’m watching German scat porn if that’s any better.

      1. Rhywun

        ??

    2. juris imprudent

      This is as close as I’m getting – to what anyone here seems to be watching.

    3. Atanarjuat

      Yeah, my dad tried to get me to watch it. We like to hate on Pelosi/Cruella DeVille, but life’s too short. I’m stretching (almost touched my toes!) and reading about unusual aspects of bee behavior. Much more satisfying.

      1. Banjos

        My six year old wants to be a beekeeper. My children are weird.

        1. Tundra

          Fourscore will coach her up. Success guaranteed.

  10. Rebel Scum

    They see me trollin’, they hatin’….

  11. Rebel Scum

    Hopefully Trump takes that to the logical conclusion of being anti drug war. (May Rand Paul ever have your ear…)

    1. Raphael

      One can only hope, man.

    2. juris imprudent

      Did you actually use “Trump” and “logical” in a sentence?

      1. Chafed

        Non-sequiturs can be a sentence.

  12. Spudalicious

    I’m enjoying Trump politely face puncheng Team Blue and the media with reality. There’s plenty of derp in the whole thing, but the look of the painful itch of hemorrhoids on the face of Team Blue is satisfying.

    1. Brett L

      Eh. Don’t get too Teamed up. Excesses happen on both sides The pain is good but also don’t forget he’s still a shitshow.

      1. Rebel Scum

        I’ll tell you what is a shit show…Ted Cruz’s facial hair is a shit show.

        1. Spudalicious

          Better than his pointy chin.

        2. Banjos

          I’m digging the beard. It’s like it’s own entity like Trump’s hair.

          1. MikeS

            I hope SF gives you the proper credit blame when this horror is unleashed upon us.

          2. SugarFree

            When the beard scampers away from Cruz, then I will begin to respect it.

          3. He’s got 2 beards now!

      2. Spudalicious

        Meh. Given what’s come before, he’s much better than I expected. If I can get an hour of satisfaction after a year of everyone who’s not a proggy being labeled as a racist/homophobic/xenophobic/mysoginist, I’m going to take it. Tonight is a brief dose of satisfaction, and tomorrow we’ll be back to derp.

  13. Rebel Scum

    That was awkward by Gulag Barbie.

    1. Chafed

      What did she do? I was listening on the radio on my drive home.

  14. Ownbestenemy

    Curious on what handler told Pelosi to continually shuffle papers during the speech. Americans like attentive people…I am not sure that will sit well.

    1. Bobarian LMD

      She forgets where she’s at.

  15. SugarFree

    AOC is wearing one of those retarded-looking split-arm, cape/jacket things. I’m sure at least three articles about it is being written by Slate right this moment.

    1. hayeksplosives

      The Daily Fail is already reporting that she “rocked” the look.

      1. Heroic Mulatto

        YASS! Slay Queen! YASS!

        1. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

          ^OK, I’m not very far along in the comments, but that is the best (first) laugh of the thread.

          Kudos to HM–the rest of you are slipping, dammit.

      2. JaimeRoberto: Gentleman, Scholar, French Tickler

        Did they have a link to where you could buy it? They are not going to pan the look if they can make money off it.

        1. Rhywun

          The big question is… how does it look on Demi Rose?

          1. BakedPenguin

            Better question – how does she look without it?

            Well… better question for me.

        2. Count Potato

          Yes.

          “Be a caped crusader in white like Alexandria

          Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and many of her fellow female lawmakers arrived at the State of the Union address wearing white as a nod to the suffragette movement. It’s a tactic that has been used numerous times before to mark historic moments for women in politics and this outfit pays homage to the long struggle for equality expertly.

          Opting for a chic cape, the Zara jacket is a confident and powerful choice. It’s also an inexpensive choice originally costing $99.90 before it dropped to $39.90.

          Sadly it’s now sold-out but you can make a stand with our similar finds below from the likes of Boohoo and bcbgmaxazria.”

          https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6671707/Democratic-women-including-AOC-Pelosi-pay-homage-suffragette-movement-SOTU.html

          1. Rhywun

            They’re more obsessed with American politics than Americans are with the royals. WTF.

  16. hayeksplosives

    This State of the Union Bingo card is a good way to while away the time.
    https://gallery.mailchimp.com/4ffb4eef17b093229bb8532db/images/cc4821a0-39e3-452f-98de-83d83d78b367.png

    1. Chafed

      That’s good. And it looks non-partisan.

  17. Bobarian LMD

    So Trump enterprises is gonna build the wall see thru steel barrier?

    1. hayeksplosives

      Yeah, I’m pretty curious what the hell he’s talking about.

  18. The Other Kevin

    Hawks were having a great first period but the Oilers just tied it up with a PPG.

    1. Tundra

      Wild going to shootout with Sabres.

      Lame.

      1. Rhywun

        Go Sabres!

        1. Tundra

          They did it!

          Still kind of a shitty team, though.

          1. Rhywun

            LOL I’m a Rangers fan.

          2. Tundra

            *winces*

            Sorry, man.

            For you.

          3. Rhywun

            That chorus is… unbelievable.

    2. I’m Here To Help

      Lightning were up 2-0 on Vegas but have let them come back to tie it up. Vegas has the momentum now, about halfway through the third.

      1. Tundra

        You’re a Florida man, too?

        Wild lost. I predict restructuring soon.

        1. I’m Here To Help

          Yeah, I’m here in Tampa as well, and a Bolts season ticket holder. Haven been to too many games this year as I still can’t bend my blasted knee enough to fit in the seats. It WILL bend enough by playoffs…

          1. Tundra

            I think your team has an excellent shot this year. 80 points already!

          2. I’m Here To Help

            They’ll go quiet at some point in the playoffs. Conference finals at best in my opinion. But a second round matchup against Toronto/Boston will be fun.

          3. Tundra

            I’d like to see a Lightning/Jets final.

      2. Shpip

        Watching the end of Lightning – Army before I go back to seeing Florida squeakyballhoops lose again.

      3. I’m Here To Help

        Tampa gave up a penalty in the last two minutes of both regulation and overtime. Killed them both, so now a shootout…

        1. I’m Here To Help

          Vasy v. Fleury. This could take a while…

          1. I’m Here To Help

            Or maybe not. Vegas wins

  19. Bobarian LMD

    Are we gonna follow up the speech with a water drinking contest?

    1. hayeksplosives

      No style points to Rubio.

  20. Ownbestenemy

    Eh… the amendment wasn’t needed as the Constitution never prohibited women to vote…but congrats?

  21. Rebel Scum

    That was weird. (And awesome…)

  22. SugarFree

    Every time Nancy stands she pees a little.

    1. Bobarian LMD

      I pee a little every time she smiles.

    2. totally_not_an_escaped_ai

      What happens when she claps? I’ve seen seals clap more humanly than her.

      1. MikeS

        Every time Nancy Pelosi claps, a demon gets it’s wings.

        1. Bobarian LMD

          Damn you!

        2. PudPaisley

          Every time Nancy blinks, the federal debt goes up another million.

          1. hayeksplosives

            Reminds me of the Great Blink-Off between Cheney and Pelosi at one of W’s state of the union addresses.

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tN5_WxLUhlk

          2. PudPaisley

            Ha ha! I don’t remember that, but it was so noticeable tonight that I actually set my timer and counted 69 blinks in one minute.

      2. Bobarian LMD

        An angel has it’s wings torn off?

      3. SugarFree

        I imagine it’s like banging two bags of dice together. Clickity-clack, clickity-clack, there’s no meat in Nancy’s hand so slack.

    3. hayeksplosives

      Pelosi thinks she’s looking with condescension at Trump, but because she’s facing the camera, it comes across as condescension toward the people watching.

      The smirking and lip smacking are not a good look.

      1. Oh god yes call them on their smirking after the Covington kerfuffle.

  23. Spudalicious

    Trump gets the white wearing resistance Democrat proggy chicks to stand up and cheer. ROFL!

    1. Rebel Scum

      USA! USA! USA!

    2. #democratssowhite

  24. Mustang

    Apparently the white coats missed the memo to hate everything Trump says. That’ll make for some great optics later when the ree brigade starts lining people up and they were witnessed cheering for something Secret Nazi President said.

  25. Rebel Scum

    But seriously, Trump is a master troll.

    1. Spudalicious

      This is known. He could teach a graduate study class on trolling.

    2. Breet Pharara

      If he can figure out a way to incorporate the phrase, “I’m going to grab China by the pussy” into his address then I might be impressed enough to vote for him.

    3. Rebel Scum

      But this is next-level.

  26. Count Potato

    Fuck. I missed that there was a new thread.

    1. hayeksplosives

      The biggest, most beautiful thread.

      1. BakedPenguin

        HUGE.

  27. Rebel Scum

    Woah….holy shit….

    1. Mustang

      Ha, which part? He’s all over the map.

      1. Rebel Scum

        No part in particular. It’s all fascinating and entertaining. We live in the best timeline.

  28. hayeksplosives

    Everybody say a little prayer for Trump’s safety tonight; Rick Perry is the Designated Survivor this year.

    1. MikeS

      OMG. Really? If the Capitol Building blows up, you know that rat bastard was behind it.

      1. MikeS

        In Rick’s defense, I know very little about him. Just that in what little I’ve seen of him, he came off to me as very…smarmy…

        1. R C Dean

          And not capable of blowing up the Capitol. Good choice.

          1. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

            Ehh…He took out a coyote with a .380 while on a jog, so he’s got some skill.

  29. Mustang

    Calling out the socialists in the audience, get some Donny.

    1. SugarFree

      Sanders is turning into an angry Muppet of himself.

      1. Mustang

        I want to know who he stared down when he said that. I hope it was Karla Marx.

        1. SugarFree

          He was pointed her way. They should mount a GoPro on his shoulder.

          1. hayeksplosives

            Excellent suggestion.

          2. Mustang

            Sounds like this needs to be part of Hat and Hair.

          3. Bobarian LMD

            CPRM would be forced to animate a POV shot of the hat raping a grapefruit?

          4. Mustang

            I suspect he and Sugarfree could come up with much, much worse.

          5. SugarFree

            You forget the duct tape at your peril.

          6. Bobarian LMD

            That’s why it would make great animation.

          7. Not Adahn

            Wouldn’t that sting rather badly?

          8. Plinker762

            With an aiming laser ala Predator

    2. hayeksplosives

      Yeah, I liked that part.

      1. totally_not_an_escaped_ai

        “The United States will never be a socialist country”. I so hope that is true.

      2. Mustang

        I’m glad he did. It needs to be restated at every opportunity.

        1. hayeksplosives

          But muh Scandahoovian dreams!!

          As someone who lived in “democratic socialism” for a couple of years in Sweden, I can tell you it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.

    3. Breet Pharara

      “The problem in Venezuela is not that socialism has been poorly implemented but that socialism has been faithfully implemented,”

      Trump is not articulate at all, but that was a great line, made even greater by the shitweasels at the UN’s reaction to it.

      1. Mustang

        I missed that. Fuck yeah.

      2. Chafed

        Let’s give credit to whoever wrote it for him.

  30. Count Potato

    Libertarian moment?

    USA!

  31. Rebel Scum

    Grandpa Gulag doesn’t want to be free. He just wants everything for free.

  32. Heroic Mulatto

    I, a parasexual, am very serious with the ghost the haunts my closet. It all started when I was taking a shower, and I felt a cold breeze flush over my body. I turned to find nothing, so I brushed it off and continued bathing. I then felt a slight sting on my butt and, upon checking on it, saw a handprint right where the pain was. I knew that there was someone from a different dimension in the same room as me. I did as any normal being would do, and started to vigorously masturbate. As the water trinkled down my back, I felt a tingle in the nether-regions. I knew what it was, and came immediately. I heard a disembodied giggle, and the jizz dissapeared. I then felt some more tingles, as the ghost went back and forth on my dick with its mouth. I started to moan, and my roommate yelled “Bro, what the fuck are you doing?” The tingle disappeared instantly afterwards, and I was heartbroken. Nothing else could’ve given me pleasure as much as that ghost. 3 years pass, and I was in many relationships. But no one could fill the hole that was left by that ghost. On the anniversary of my head from the ghost, I was crying while masturbating to ghost videos on Pornhub, and I felt a nostalgic, but all too familiar tingle on my dick. I cried tears of joy as I slowly saw an outline of the very ghost that blew me appear. It hopped upon my yogurt slinger, and we fucked for hours. All until the ghost finally had enough and squirted its sweet ectoplasm all over my shaft. We’ve been fucking ever since.

    Thank you, and God bless America.

    1. MikeS

      *One solitary tear rolls down cheek*

      *feels tingle on cheek as tear disappears*

    2. Pecan Sandy

      +1 Ray Stanz

    3. Bobarian LMD

      That ghost?

      Ruth Bader Ginsberg.

      And now you know… the rest of the story.

      1. Heroic Mulatto

        Were you present during the thread were I solicited ideas for the title of the porn version of “On the Basis of Sex”?

        1. Jarflax

          It was the ghost of Isabel Caro…

        2. Pan Zagloba

          She fucks K-2SO but he’s destroyed because sex aids are illegal, and so she decides to rebel by becoming First Female Judge? And has a lesbian scene with Judge Anderson?

        3. Bobarian LMD

          No, I missed that.

          Let me contemplate…

          1. Bobarian LMD

            The opening of Musty Beethoven?

            Behind the Black Robe?

            Sex on the Bases?

            Ruthie Does Washington?

            The Notorious RBJ?

            SCJILF?

    4. Pan Zagloba

      ???

    5. Gustave Lytton

      The Ghost and Mr Muir

    6. Chafed

      Does your wife know you write this stuff?

  33. mikey

    Y’all are almost making me wish I were watching it.
    Almost
    This is better.

  34. Banjos

    Holy shit, never fully realized how female heavy dems are versus male heavy Republicans. Our country has turned into a battle of the sexes.

    1. Breet Pharara

      What’s the female equivalent of an Uncle Tom?

      1. hayeksplosives

        Libertarian Wymmen?

      2. SugarFree

        A Betty Crocker.

      3. Banjos

        A stay-at-home mom?

      4. commodious spittoon

        Gisele Brady?

      5. Aunt Jemima?

  35. SugarFree

    The Joint Chiefs all look like their butt plugs squirted out simultaneously.

    1. totally_not_an_escaped_ai

      Ha. Their after-retirement obscene $$ jobs in the military-industrial complex may take a hit if wars actually end.

  36. Pecan Sandy

    Did he get to this part yet?

    https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=3CCh9sk-9l4

  37. Rebel Scum

    Keep shuffling those papers, Nancy.

  38. Count Potato

    He likes Jews too? Wow, this guy sucks at being Hitler.

    1. Mustang

      He seems to be going down the list of grievances and addressing each one. It’s quite enjoyable.

      1. hayeksplosives

        The people who claim Trump is a bigot conveniently forget about how in the early nineties he sued the Palm Beach city council because they wanted to prevent him from buying Mar-a-Lago and opening up membership to “new money”, i.e. successful self-made wealthy Jews and Blacks.

        Before the council hearing, Trump send DVDs of Guess who’s Coming to Dinner? and A Gentlemen’s Agreement.

        Epic Troll since at least the early 90s.

        1. Mustang

          You mean finding ways to make another dollar might have reduced segregation? Well, now I’ve heard everything.

          1. Gustave Lytton

            Huh. Next you’ll tell me Jim Crow laws were enacted because some uppity businesses didn’t give a shit who they did business with.

          2. Breet Pharara

            Talking to a Prog tip #152: Always emphasis the LAW part of Jim Crow LAWS.

          3. Breet Pharara

            *emphasize

        2. hayeksplosives

          I meant to say he sent copies of the movie DVDs to every council member. To their homes, I believe.

          1. Michael

            I had never heard about this, so I just looked it up. Holy fuck. The man is an absolute baller.

    2. SugarFree

      Trump also admitted the Holocaust is real. Worst Secret Nazi President Ever.

      1. Chafed

        I noticed that too. I’m waiting for the Slate stories on how he leads a double life.

    3. The Other Kevin

      He’s not *really* Hitler, he’s just *literally* Hitler.

  39. Shpip

    TOS has a cocktail they recommend drinking during the speech.

    I like The Last Word, but where I’m at, I’m drinking Singapore Slings, because it’s a boat drink, and it’s twenty degrees (C) and the hockey game’s on.

    1. R C Dean

      So TOS actually has cocktails for the SOTU? Really not fighting the stereotype, are they?

      1. Heroic Mulatto

        Well, there is nothing inherently wrong with cocktail parties, per se, it’s the people you invite to them.

        1. Michael

          In TOS’s case, it’s more about which ones you get invited to.

  40. Raven Nation

    I don’t know about y’all but I’m listening to Van Morrison with a satisfactory amount of single-malt, looking at some wedding pics. And you know what? I’m feeling happy and content.

    Fuck all politicians, statists, and assorted shitbags who think they can run my life.

    1. Tundra

      Just shut the game off. Sitting by the fire with the dog and You People.

      1. MikeS

        #metoo.

        Except I wasn’t watching any game.

        And we don’t have a fireplace.

        And the dog is in the other room.

        Otherwise, #metoo.

    2. Who the hell looks at wedding photos?

  41. Mustang

    He is calling out the legislators like nobody’s business. This is excellent.

  42. SugarFree

    I finally spotted Ruthie in the audience.

    1. The Other Kevin

      You can’t fool me, that picture was from like 20 years ago.

      1. Breet Pharara

        You win this round.

        *shakes fist*

      2. The Other Kevin

        I think you got me on style.

    2. Breet Pharara

      WOW! Did she find the fountain of youth, because she looks better than she has in years.

  43. KSuellington

    It seems very unifying. Who could not choose greatness and freedom and bald eagles?

    1. Mustang

      Oh they’ll twist it. I definitely heard some things to disagree with, but anybody who tries to say he was divisuve in that speech is a goddamn liar.

  44. Pan Zagloba

    I missed it but hopefully there’ll be good sound clips for CPRM.

    1. MikeS

      Ditto

  45. Spudalicious

    We go back to status bullshit tomorrow, but tonight has been very satisfying. Whether you like the guy or not, Trump just spent 90 minutes politely punching the narrative in the nuts. I feel somewhat better about our future. Let apathy rein.

    1. Mustang

      That accurately sums up my feelings about it.

      1. Rebel Scum

        Seconded.

  46. hayeksplosives

    Here’s a link to Trump’s anti-socialist remarks. I’m trying to figure out what Pelosi’s reaction was meant to be. I also appreciated the CSPAN cameraman zoomed straight in on Bernie’s scowling face.

    https://www.realclearpolitics.com/video/2019/02/05/trump_america_will_never_be_a_socialist_country_we_were_born_free_and_we_shall_stay_free.html

    1. Mustang

      Yeah, is she a “closet” socialist or what was going on there? Are we looking at a socialist coup in Congress and he just dared them to try it? Her reaction was odd.

    2. MikeS

      She was shaking her head and smirking. I think an eye roll, too. Unbelievable.

      And when he delivered the last line and the R’s rose to cheer, it was funny to watch them…all of them were looking left to see who would stand. It was shameful how many didn’t. America needs to wake the fuck up.

      1. Rebel Scum

        Manchin seems to be one of the few sane Democrats.

        1. Spudalicious

          I actually like Manchin. He’s Team Blue, but he’s not an ideologue.

          1. MikeS

            I miss the Blue Dogs.

    3. Raphael

      Are you yanking my chain because that is hilarious.

      1. hayeksplosives

        No chains were yanked in my comment above. CSPAN camera guy knew who Trump was calling out.

        1. Michael

          It looked like his dentures were about to fall out but he caught them just in the nick of time.

    4. Michael

      Man, all of those Dems remaining seated during the standing ovation sure are going to play well in flyover.

    1. Breet Pharara

      Joseph Davis
      ‏ @josephdavis9143
      36m36 minutes ago
      Replying to @SallyMayweather

      I guess you’re history illiterate also. Party platform switch happened. Fact.
      1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes

      1. hayeksplosives

        Out-freaking-standing.

    2. Rebel Scum

      Epic.

  47. Rufus the Monocled

    Man did he troll hard. So much so he got the commie women in white to chant USA! USA! USA!

    Make fun of him all you want, but man that was pretty good.

    He got the DNC to stand up more than they wanted to I’m sure.

    He’s more believable than what his name? Barry was it?

  48. Count Potato

    “I have the same dentist as Lauren Hutton!”

  49. Rufus the Monocled

    Why was Nancy reading notes and what was she doing with her mouth? It was very annoying.

    1. LJW

      “what was she doing with her mouth?”

      Talking? Yeah it’s annoying when she does that.

    2. hayeksplosives

      She was trying to seem disrespectful and dismissive to Trump personally but came across as smug and superior to about half the nation.

      The mouth thing, I don’t know. Maybe dry mouth is a side effect of whatever drugs they are using to keep her alive.

      1. SugarFree

        She should have used Polident.

        1. hayeksplosives

          You could actually be onto something with that theory.

          1. MikeS

            It’s a trending meme as we speak

  50. Spudalicious

    “America will never be a socialist country. We were born free and we shall stay free.”

    Cortez and Bernie hug and have a sad.

  51. Count Potato

    How the fuck are Republicans against voting?

    1. Mustang

      I forgot about the “rebuttal” or whatever the fuck it is. I don’t think there’s any way for Dems to rebut without coming across as venal and petty.

  52. Count Potato

    Um, the Democrats were behind Jim Crow you idiot.

    1. Pecan Sandy

      But muh party flip!!!

      1. Breet Pharara

        Joseph Davis
        ‏ @josephdavis9143
        36m36 minutes ago
        Replying to @SallyMayweather

        I guess you’re history illiterate also. Party platform switch happened. Fact.
        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes

        That’s just the first one I found on the “Dems created the KKK” meme. There are more than a few similar responses. They actually believe it.

      2. hayeksplosives

        Hey, I recognize that avatar! I haven’t thought about Lil Brudder in years. LOL.

        1. Pecan Sandy

          It was either gonna be him or tenderfoot. Lil Brudder won cuz he’s gonna be a quarterback when he grows up.

          1. hayeksplosives

            That’s why my husband and I started calling Eli Manning “Lil Brudder” when he was overhyped and his first couple of seasons were “meh”. He’d throw an interception and get that pouty defeated look and we’d say “He’s gonna be a quarterback some day.”

            Course, that was before he won two rings.

          2. Pecan Sandy

            That’s perfect. I think the elder Manning brother, the non football one, still calls Eli little bro or something like that.

  53. MikeS

    My wife watched the tail end of it on ABC. She said after it was over, the first thing David Muir said was, “Trump gave the Dems ample opportunity to applaud…and they didn’t”. Will we see just a smattering of honest reporting about it tomorrow?

    A boy can dream…

  54. Ownbestenemy

    Cruel intentions upon myself I was on CNN just as the “rebuttal” finished and the panel all orgasmed that her response was so good.

    1. Mustang

      ABC immediately came back saying that the rebuttal was a true example of bipartisanship and the SOTU showed none.

      WTF.

  55. SugarFree

    NBC rushes to suck AOC’s lady-dick right away.

    1. Breet Pharara

      Pics?

    2. SugarFree

      And she talks like a slightly drunk 12-year-old. Maybe she’s up past her bedtime.

      1. SugarFree

        “Our policies are sooooo POP-u-lar!”

        1. Akira

          +1 tippy tops

      2. Gustave Lytton

        I’M NOT TIRED!

      3. PudPaisley

        If only SNL could be so clever and funny…

        https://www.facebook.com/thc1776/videos/625748931188578/

        Only link I could find was on FB.

    3. Chafed

      Calling HM.

    1. Rufus the Monocled

      Lol.

    2. Pan Zagloba

      My choice of political bloodsport is UK Parliamentary Elections, but damn, Democrat primary season is shaping up nicely.

        1. Count Potato

          I need to see that movie.

          1. SugarFree

            The book is also fantastic.

          2. Rhywun

            Except all the names look alike.

            (I gave up about 1/4 in. Loved the movie.)

    3. straffinrun

      “”As Senator Warren has said she is not a citizen of any tribe and only tribes determine tribal citizenship. She is sorry that she was not more mindful of this earlier in her career,” said Kristen Orthman, a spokeswoman for Warren, in a statement.”

      I didn’t know I would run for office in the future.

  56. hayeksplosives

    Man, the Blackhawks are crushing it in this 3rd period. 4-2 over Edmonton with over 10 min left.
    5:51
    Patrick Kane (32)

    5:23
    Dylan Strome (13)

    3:50
    John Hayden (3)

    1. hayeksplosives

      6:38
      Drake Caggiula (9)

      1. Spudalicious

        Is that a sport you’re watching? Or hockey?

        1. hayeksplosives

          Har har.

          It the sport that soccer should have been, but with at a faster pace, less acting, and more violence.

          1. MikeS

            Don’t listen. He picked the Dallas Cowboys as his favorite team…as an adult. He obviously knows nothing about sports.

          2. Breet Pharara

            I’m sorry, is AMERICA’S TEAM not good enough for you, terrorist scum.

          3. Spudalicious

            ^^This^^

          4. MikeS

            THIS is America’s Team.

          5. Spudalicious

            Fuck yeah!

          6. Chafed

            I was sort of expecting the Swedish Bikini Team but then I remembered you’re not Q.

          7. Spudalicious

            It stopped being fun when they stopped drafting violent felons. #SocceronIce.

      2. hayeksplosives

        12:12
        Dominik Kahun (9)

      3. MikeS

        UniNoDak product!

        1. hayeksplosives

          Woo-hoo!

  57. dorvinion

    Everyone’s comments are almost convincing me I should have watched.

    Which network had the best feed?

  58. Michael

    The Dems really need to hire some better PR flacks.

    https://twitter.com/ReaganBattalion/status/1092980602406649858

    1. Rhywun

      lulz

      I would not have believed this whole smocks-against-Trump movement if I hadn’t seen it (credibly!) reported in the news.

    2. Chafed

      Their trolling would be even better if they proofread before posting.

  59. Michael

    And the award for the most tragically bungled pop cultural reference goes to…

    https://twitter.com/googliegop/status/1092996421450694656

  60. Gustave Lytton

    Speaking of yellow dog democrats, John Marsh died yesterday.

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Otho_Marsh_Jr.

    1. Chafed

      That’s not the link you’re looking for.

      1. Gustave Lytton

        Gah. It’s WordPress dropping the period from the url. Try again

        https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Otho_Marsh_Jr.

        1. dorvinion

          Still didn’t

          URL shortened

          1. Gustave Lytton

            *shakes fist at sky*

        2. Chafed

          I think we can add Lyttoned it to the lexicon.

  61. CPRM

    I was at work. You guys better not be lying about the audio content and the best lines best not be ruined by chants or applause. Now I have to parse this shit for an episode. *Grabs another beer.*

    1. CPRM

      “You are out of your mind if you don’t think the FBI wanted to make a case if we could. The facts weren’t there collected. Period. Full stop.”

      Am I write fellow USA citizen?!

      1. Chafed

        Right on the money.

        1. CPRM

          Da. Much good at internet am I.

  62. PieInTheSky

    So how much money did the trolling tonight cost the Australian economy?

    Good morning glibsters

    1. Rhywun

      Good night.

    2. CPRM

      You who else made a play for the Australian economy?

      1. Gustave Lytton

        Prussia?

      2. Spudalicious

        Steve Erwin Hitler?

        Yeah, I’m out.

      3. C. Anacreon

        The Qantas Koala?

  63. The “fact checking” coming out of last night is absolutely nuts. These folks have not learned a single lesson.

    https://twitter.com/neontaster/status/1093035269538758656

    https://twitter.com/Styx666Official/status/1092993176267313152

    1. Hurr Hurr orange man liar durr durr

  64. Just for Hyperion – since I missed last thread – recommend checking out Nitro PDF – good bargain, easy editing and fully compatible (from my experiences).

  65. dorvinion

    A bit of refreshing honesty

    “I’m in congress and you should be afraid of me”

    https://twitter.com/ReElectNydia/status/1093006356788011008