Author: Brett L

  • Valentines Day Links of Loooove

    We, the Glibs staff, are really down with certain St. Valentine’s Day traditions. Like the St. Valentine’s Day Massacre. I hope everyone is doing a little something special for that special something in your life. Robohos don’t come with a self-cleaning option yet.

    Great news, there’s a cure for HPV. Not a vaccine, a cure. Condoms can be safely (less unsafely?) ignored by college students with access to birth control.

    Is your sexbot spying on you? How many of you get turned on at the idea of a robot crushing your limbs during sex?

    Great news for Q on this V-Day.

    You know who else pulls out? Not Sloopy. Pretty sure my eldest was also conceived by that method, applied poorly.

    For all you guys who got the VD put back in Valentines Day.

  • Is it Going to Be Monday ALL DAY?? Afternoon Links

    I b’leve I might get my ass kicked for saying this, but I might have a case of the Mondays. As in, this day can go crawl up its own ass and die already. And this has NOTHING WHATEVER to do with the fact that I stayed up drinking beer and going down the YouTube rabbit hole way later than I should. You watch 10 clips with an average length of 20 minutes and ho-lee fuck! Its late and shit. So here’s your damn links. I’m going to take a nap.

    Is secretly pink flying squirrels a euphemisim for anything? It sounds like something dirty.

    Ms. Dolly Parton celebrated giving away her 100 MILLIONTH book to encourage families to read to their young children. That’s a hell of a great thing.

    This just goes to show that there’s no minimum IQ for parenting.

    Wow. Trump’s approval rating hits 52%. I’m not Mr. Trump’s biggest fan, but given that he’s opposing a group of socialist morons who think Venezuela just needed a more feminine touch, I wouldn’t be surprised if his approval hits 62% by November 2020. Serious question, how in the hell is PROG HARDER!!11! still getting 50% of the votes that get counted?

    Suffer with me!

  • Friday Afternoon Links

    Happy Friday, ev’rbody. I hope I get 800 comments on MY thread. Wink,wink.

    I posted this in the morning comments, but here’s a Florida Man cocktail for you:

    Russian Tang
    4 oz Mad Dragon orange “wine-based product”
    2 oz Russian vodka — don’t waste $$ on expensive stuff
    Fill a glass full of ice. Mix. Two of these will make you not care that you’re strapped to a Russian rocket with no control over whether it goes to space or blows up.

    Texas Woman fights off machete wielding clowns with scooter. God Bless Texas.

    Oh boy. Every Presidential administration has to tilt at this windmill. Kushner to announce Middle East Peace Plan. I assume it is not to ramp up production at General Dynamics and let them sort out a lasting peace by any means necessary while paying hard currency for the, er, tools.

    I present to you… the pinnacle of Florida Man and Woman.

    Damn, man. I didn’t even know you could move $10K worth of stolen cigarettes. What’s the market for that? Venezuela. Or course, the way prices were going last I checked, that’s probably only 100 cartons now, “street value”

    I think I know why these tigers are endangered.

    I’m in a punk mood today. No telling how many of those Russian Tangs I’ll have had by the time this goes up.

  • Wednesday Afternoon Links

    Its always tough to follow a Hat & Hair episode. I mourn for the rest of the world who has not lived through our wonderful alternate reality. Here are some fun links to get you talking.

    Florida Woman resigns from city council after being accused of non-consensual face-licking. Apparently, this is the final act in a long-running feud.

    Cops who shot armed security guard in back will not face charges. Fuck.

    Brits give two-fingered salute to EC President. He must be a secret Brexiter.

    Greeks also taking the piss out of EU. The Greek Health Minister smokes when he drinks! Reeeeee!

    How about a little Western Swing in honor of the Greeks.

  • SOTU Open Thread

    It’s going to be the best.Bigly speech. Not for losers. Comment so I can remember. I’m timing my second handle of vodka to start at 9pm.

  • Tuesday Afternoon Links

    Tues..day Aff…ternoon. Is that how the song goes? Somebody put AM gold in my head this morning and now its all a big ugly mess of shitty hair and soft-focus. How the Hell are you?

    To move things forward about a decade, Aldi is selling 80s inspired cheeses. Its amazing to me how time condenses genres as long as they had sufficient radio airplay.

    I want to thank our Glib contributor who pointed out that China is probably the reason the US is abandoning the Intermediate-Range Nuclear Forces Treaty. And now France is flexing? Bruh. Just… Don’t. Your embarrassing everyone.

    I don’t know about saving me from suicidal ideation, but the only time I really felt like I understood Apocalypse Now was on a slide into the k hole. Who knew that all those years in my early 20s I was pursuing potentially effective medicinal cures? Certainly I did not.

    US Army prepares to invade LA!

    Can’t understand why Aldi didn’t pick this band. The very definition of trying too hard.

  • Monday Afternoon Links

    Hi, everyone. I hope each of you was one of the 40M predicted vacation/PTO/sick-outs from SuperMediocreBowl Sunday. I’m enjoying Meeting Monday. Let’s have another meeting to talk about what we’re going to do so generally that there isn’t any actionable decision made! Big thanks to Elspeth Flashman, STEVE SMITH, and Mexican Sharpshooter for picking up links last week. And Spud looks to working up to a regular work-in with his work this weekend. I’m digging the variety, but you just get my plain old meh effort. Congratulations, comrades!

    So glad to here that the CDC has solved all of the serious problems around childhood health in America. Whyn’t’cha get on that syndrome you can’t even identify the transmission vector of that is paralyzing a couple hundred American children a year, and then get back to us about the fucking toothpaste problem?

    I don’t think you get to bill your board members when they request supporting documentation. If someone did this to me on a board I was serving on, I would give them until the next board meeting to get me the documents and then the first item of new business would be termination with cause of everyone who participated in not delivering those documents, and if that got voted down, item two would be my resignation. Either the board is making the decisions and running the place or they are not. Someone has to go at that point. Me or them.

    Hey look, floods bring crocs to neighborhood streets in Oz. Is this really news?

    Growing unemployment in China? I’m eagerly awaiting Tom Friedman’s column on how properly empowered strongmen can solve this!

     

     

  • Tuesday Afternoon Links

    Well, its Tuesday, my kid is home sick from school, and I’ve done shit, sub-type jack, all day except play Entertainment Director to a five year old who should have gone the hell to VPK. We’re gun shy about sending him because school policy is that if they get caught with a fever over 100.4, they have to go home and stay home the next day. And the three-year old’s former teacher (now gone, yay!) used to jack with the system to get kids sent home so she could have fewer kids in her class. So anyway, five year old has “tripped on the stairs” and “hurt his knee” like six times today. But only when I’m trying to work.

    Well good on the Eugene, OR cops for taking on this armed moron at a school. Textbook response. Engage, ask them to walk (but be nice), help them walk (but be nice), shoot them dead when they draw a firearm.

    Grauniad gonna grauniad. In their view, Bill Gates is lying with statistics when he says the world is getting better. Even though fewer people of dying of disease and starvation:

    Prior to colonisation, most people lived in subsistence economies where they enjoyed access to abundant commons – land, water, forests, livestock and robust systems of sharing and reciprocity. They had little if any money, but then they didn’t need it in order to live well – so it makes little sense to claim that they were poor. This way of life was violently destroyed by colonisers who forced people off the land and into European-owned mines, factories and plantations, where they were paid paltry wages for work they never wanted to do in the first place.

  • Monday Afternoon Links

    SP leaves us alone for one day to do important stuff like pack for a move and we drop the ball on a midday post. I tell you folks, she’s the person who keeps this site running, and everyone should bow and scrape shamelessly to her. Shit, I can’t make the links run on time every day. Anyhow, happy Monday. I’m studying for what I fondly hope are my last set of M$ tests ever. The GRE was a fucking joke compared to their shitty, hard, nit-picky exams. But the upside is that they’re mostly worth a shit if you have some experience, and its a voluntary non-governmental solution to figuring out who the fuck to hire.*

    Most Austin bank-robber ever? Here’s a tip, you don’t want the getaway vehicle associated with you.

    I am reliably told that handguns never resolve any situation peaceably. I’m sure this is just an aberration.

    After outliving its desired service lifespan by 15 (Earth) years, it appears that the Opportunity Mars rover may be dead. If only we could get that kind of service life out of cell-phones.

    It must have been pretty shitty when this thief tried the pills he stole.

     

    For all you people who live in the cold parts. I’m not there because…

     

    *If you make hiring decisions, technology certifications should match experience. Its a big red flag if they don’t (Jimbo has 4 MSCEs but has never done anything but helpdesk? Maybe he shouldn’t be hired as your Director of IT Operations). Also, lots of very talented, knowledgeable people in my and other IT fields never bother getting certifications.

  • Friday Afternoon Links

    Happy Friday afternoon. Here are some links. Too tired to do the chitchat thing.

    Hospitals are claiming that parents do not have right to review their minor child’s medical records well below majority. As young as 10-12. And saying it is Federal Law. I’d love to see RC Dean’s take on this. My own personal take is that, if nothing else, those records might contain evidence of negligence or incompetence that it is my legal obligation to protect my child from until they take over that duty at the age of majority. Now, I don’t think I would have a problem if a pediatrician asked me if they could talk to my 12 year old without me in the room.

    Trump says there’s going to be a temporary deal to reopen the FedGov. Sad. That’s for losers.

    The Republic of Macedonia is now the Republic of North Macedonia. And this being the Balkans, both the (North) Macedonians and the Greeks hate the deal.