Author: sloopyinca

Liverpool pounded the shit out of Arsenal.I mean they just humiliated them. Man City also won handily, but as far as the “big six”, not too good a weekend otherwise.

Tottenham and ManUre both went down to bottom-feeders, at home. And Chelski eked out a win. Rory McIlroy won a shitload of money. And by shitload, I mean  he won a cool $15M for winning the Tour Championship.  And he would have won it without the stroke handicap system they used for the final event of the season (which I actually liked).  The US Open starts in a handful of hours, for you tennis fans out there.  I’m picking Joker and Serena to win. Yes, I know that’s not being very brave, but that’s where we are in tennis right now.  And trust me, I only hope I’m half right.

The Yankees beat the Dodgers last night in what some people are hoping is a preview of the World Series. I’m not one of those people.  The Firstros thumped the Angels and now share the best record in the AL with the aforementioned Bronx Bombers. They’re both one game back of the Dodgers for the best record overall. Other winners from yesterday were: Baltimore, Atlanta, Kansas City, Miami, Pittsburgh, Arizona, Chicago (AL), Minnesota, St Louis, Washington, San Francisco, San Diego and Seattle.

And Andrew Luck dropped a shit-bomb in the lap of the Colts over the weekend.  Not quite as big a turd as that Miami-Florida college game was Saturday night though.  I mean…Jesus, that was the worst-played college game I’ve seen in some time. There is no other way to put it.

Is today your birthday? If it is, you’ve got the following to keep company with: first ever British Prime Minister Robert Walpole, missionary and humanitarian Mother Teresa, sax player Branford Marsalis, former child actor Macaulay Culkin, Rockets guard James Harden and …that’s it.  Shit, what a dreadfully short and weak list.

OK, now let’s all settle in for … the links!

This is the funniest story all weekend. Of course the sources are all unnamed. There is no documentation to support the accusation. Nobody in the meetings has stepped forward and said its what happened and several people involved have all denied that the conversations ever took place.  But fuck it, let’s run with it anyway.

Let me see if I have this straight. So they’re gonna do to you what you’ve been doing to the subjects of your pieces for years? How fucking dare they!!! Or is it ok for CNN to threaten to doxx someone if they don’t take down a internet meme? Or for newsmedia to dig through Kyle Kashuv’s social media from when he was 14 because he’s pro-gun?  Fuck you, you morally repugnant “gatekeepers” of the news.  Sorry your anti-semitism and racism is gonna be brought to life.

Pretty sure this is an excessive and wasteful use of resources. But the “victim” is maintaining his story, and if its true this was a heinous crime of lynching. So may as well use everything to make sure this kind of thing never happens again.

Gamers worry about the weirdest shit. That’s all I got for this one.

When keeping it real goes wrong.  Also, don’t forget bring a (second) towel.

How kind of you parasites. Oh, it doest really restore property rights, it just gives people a window of time to do what you tell them to do or go back to being fucked over.  So much for freedom.

If you plan to watch the SpaceX launch tonight, make sure you aren’t watching through your window.

No birthday musicians worth playing, so I’m declaring prima nocte and just picking something I wanted to hear.

That’s all for today, dear friends. Hope the week gets off to a good start for you.

Hope you’ve all had a wonderful week so far.  Mine has been a treat, as I’ve been able to come back and do these links again.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t take preseason football seriously, so I won’t even bother giving them. But I sure am ready for football to get here. Your winners last night in baseball were:Boston, Chicago (NL), Tampa, NY (NL), Atlanta, St Louis, Chicago (AL), Oakland, Los Angeles (NL) and the Houston Astros hung on after another great pitching outing from their starter and a very shaky 9th from the bullpen. But a win is a win!

Just in case you were wondering about the US Open draw, here are a few interesting tidbits.  Interesting that Sharapova and Serena get to play in Round 1.  I’ll be getting my popcorn for the press conference if Sharapova wins that. Because I can assure you that Serena will go completely off the rails.

Alright, let’s get into some birthdays here.  We’ve got pre-Belgian Charles Martel, headless king Louis XVI, dancer-actor Gene Kelly, TV’s Barbara Eden, The Who’s Keith Moon, 80s heartthrob Rick Springfield, drug connoisseur River Phoenix, basketball’s Kobe Bryant and funny man Jay Mohr.  Congrats to you…and to you as well. You know who you are.

My God, I just noticed I’m getting behind and better hurry up so I can be on time with…the links!

I don’t know about you, but this is good news as far as I’m concerned. I’m sure the media will spin it as a sign of the impending financial apocalypse (that they’ll forget in December of next year and pivot to something else), but it would be nice to see prices keep falling.

Everybody is entitled to live where they want. Even if they think the rest of us shitmunchers “have made enough money at some point”. Double-points for screeching about global warming  and then buying a mansion on Martha’s Vineyard. Pretty house though.

I never got this shit.  Why do people go apeshit when someone has received a donation from a piece of shit?  The correct response, as far as I’m concerned, would be to say “Yeah, he gave us $800k. We’re glad we have it so it can be put to better use than he’d have done with it. What he did was awful and we hope we put the donation to better use.”  But no!!! Can’t do that. You have to go give the money away now to another charity and recalculate your budget. Because somehow the money was dirty when you got it but its not dirty when you send it somewhere else?  Man, social signaling sucks.

San Francisco has announced a new large-scale program to build two new centers for the homeless to shoot up in and use as public toilets.  But don’t worry. They won’t be built for six years, so they’re for the next crop of homeless.

Jimmy Carter is back to doing the thing he did best. Good for him. I wish more former politicians would get into actual charity work. It sets a good example that charity do more than government programs.

The next round of Dem debates may be crowded after all.  I don’t care about Steyer, but I hope Tulsi makes it. Just so she can show she’s anti-war and the progs can go after her as a Russian stooge because she doesn’t want war.  Plus because she’s pretty damn good looking.

Anyway, here’s today’s song.  Be sure to turn the volume to max before you click the link.  Trust me.

Anyway, have a great day. Yeah, you.

Yeah, I’m back again today. Send your complaints to management!

I’m still stewing over last night.  Probably not as much as Verlander though.  Complete game on 96 pitches, 11 strikeouts, no walks and gives up just two hits…and takes the L. What a load of shit. How about some run support, huh guys?

The As beat the Yankees, the Cubs won, as the Cards fell to the Brewers,The Twins were blanked but Cleveland lost too, And of course the Dodgers won. I don’t know if any of the other games really matter. College football about to start and I’m stoked.  Same for the US Open, where a certain chair umpire was told he would not be involved in any of Serena Williams’s matches by the way. Which does little more than add to her God complex. Meh, oh well. Hopefully she’ll get knocked out early and Venus can pull off a miracle and make a deep run.

Happy Birthday to my brother in law! And happy birthday to the following people you may be more familiar with: aviation pioneer Samuel Langley, composer Claude Debussy, Krazy Kat creator George Herriman, German filmmaker Leni Riefenstahl, Chinese sociopath Deng Xiaoping, bluesman John Lee Hooker, sci-fi heavyweight Ray Bradbury, baseball player Carl Yastzremski, football’s Bill Parcells, and musician Tori Amos.

Ok, lets get into…the links!

Telling people massively subsidized shit is free is a tougher sell than you’d think. Thank you, New Hampshire, for understanding what “free” really means when the government is involved.

Germany is selling government bonds with negative rates. What surprised me most is that there were already $16B in negative-yield bonds already floating around out there.  But if I buy them with Zimbabwean money, I’d still be a trillionaire. And a quadrillionaire when they mature!

I’ve actually found a cop who got fired that I feel bad for. The man’s out there doing community outreach and this is the thanks he gets? Shame on you, Georgia.  Also, how does a 22 year old have three years in the police department under his belt?

Good for you. Now leave those of us alone who feel differently. But seriously, read the piece. Its hilarious in its stupidity.

Wait a second. Can someone explain to me how someone can be loitering around their own broken-down car?  But seriously, this guy does worse with flat tires than Beto O’Rourke. But oddly enough better than Rico Suave.

Dammit God, couldn’t you have waited until the Canadian Geese were migrating?

Florida vacation home invaded by vomiting vultures. I have nothing else to add.

That’s it.  Now enjoy this.

Have a great day, friends!

Let see if I remember how to do this…its been far too long.

Chris Sale is out for the year, and with him go the 2019 Red Sox chances.  The Astros dangled the AL West at the Athletics last week but hopefully snatched it back away a little yesterday. Let’s just hope Carlos Correa isn’t injured after leaving early. The Yankees and Dodgers are effectively waiting on the playoffs. And the NL Central is gonna be fun down the stretch.  Oh, yeah…and football is around the corner with the preseason AP Poll being released yesterday.  (If there’s anything less useful in the sports world, I’m not sure what it is.  Except for maybe the Phoenix Coyotes.)

If you were born on this date, you share it with the following: Antarctica discoverer Fabian Gottlieb von Bellingshausen, Ohioan Benjamin Harrison, writer H.P. Lovecraft, poet Salvatore Quasimodo, boxing promoter Don King, genius politician Ron Paul, sociopath Slobodan Milosevic, Led Zeppelin frontman Robert Plant, (once-)fat guy Al Roker, “Dimebag” Darrell Abbott, and “Dumbass” Demi Lovato.  Happy Birthday!

OK, let’s see what’s happening as I bring you…the links!

LOL, oh England. What the hell happened to you? Let this be a warning to all those dumbasses who say people don’t get locked up for petty things.

I assume by “mistakes”, she means stealing their heritage for personal gain at the expense of someone else. But don’t worry, Indians. She’s gonna cleanse herself by giving you a bunch of free shit taken from people that never wronged you.

If you’re gonna shill bid, at least be discrete.  You’re killing the otherwise sterling reputation of us auctioneers, :-0.

Chicago Teachers Union steps in shit. And they could have done it by traveling to San Francisco for less than half the price of visiting Venezuela.

And in the latest installment of “Wow, the timing here sure is convenient”, Jeffrey Epstein signed his new will two days before he died.  I wonder where his interesting art will end up?

Well that’s it.  Except for this, obviously.  Have a great day, friends!

Geez, I’ve been busy.  This auction is kicking my ass and still 12 days to go before showtime. I doubt anybody will see me here for a few weeks after today, but that’s the way it goes sometimes.

I don’t even know what’s going on in the sports world really. I know Mickelson tried to play golf at what appeared to be midnight en route to winning (sometime this morning) Pebble Beach. And I know that Liverpool won but Man City steamrolled Chelsea in what should cost their manager his job. The AAC got started and from what I hear, people like what they are seeing. College basketball is a roller coaster this year. And I will have to watch more hockey to know what’s going on, although its apparent the Ducks suck since they just canned their coach.

Thomas Edison was born on this day. Sow as novelist and screenwriter Sidney Sheldon, actress Eva Gabor, funnyman Leslie Nielsen, Panamanian strongman Manuel Noriega, legendary actor Burt Reynolds, JEB!, Sarah Palin, Jennifer Aniston (is 50!), and radio host Alex Jones.

Its also the day the following happened: Robert Fulton patented the steamboat, Ike was named commander of Allied European forces (to the chagrin of Monty), the Yalta Agreement was signed, the Ayatollah seized power in Iran, Weird Al recorded his first LP, Buster Douglas knocked Mike Tyson out in Tokyo and Nelson Mandela was released from prison.

OK, now the links!

May asks for yet more time to negotiate Brexit. Jesus, this is getting ridiculous.  Just walk away and tell the EU that they’re negotiating with a completely sovereign nation now. Its become the only way they’ll let you voluntarily leave their little socialist club and its also the only way the saboteurs in your own government will lose leverage.

What the shit is Executive Time anyway?  Actually, I don’t really give a shit. In fact, I wish every single elected and appointed government official would spend at least half of their schedule on “executive time”. It might mean they don’t have enough time to lord over my daily life and come up with more ways to steal what I’ve earned.

I know this is shocking, but Rep. Ilhan Omar appears to be an anti-Semite. Go read the tweet, btw…its full of Jewish leftists saying how they’re such big fans off hers but are disappointed in this.  Yeah, because this doesn’t mirror everything she’s publicly said about Israel for years.

I swear, I have never heard a song of hers, but Joy Villa has some balls. I won’t comment on her politics other than to say its nice that at least one person in the industry is standing up against the same of progressive stupidity and hypocrisy.

14 more to have charges dropped in Chicago because of scumbag cop Ronald Watts.  Good! Now I hope they sue the city for millions and win. (Sorry, taxpayers of Chicago who don’t continue to vote for the idiots that enable this police union. Its probably time to give up and get the hell out of there.)

So it looks like the brother of Jeff Bezos’s mistress is the one who leaked his dick pics to the National Enquirer. Um, who shares dirty texts with their brother or sister? If she didn’t, he belongs in jail. If she did…weeeeeeird family dynamic going on there.

The Houston Chronicle did an exhaustive investigation into sex abuse at the Southern Baptist Church. The results are really bad. I mean really, really, really bad.

No idea why I picked this today. I know how polarizing he is. Maybe that’s why!

Anyway, have a great day out there, friends!

Everton and Spurs were bounced from the FA Cup. The USMNT beat Panama in a match that was anything but a “friendly”. All of the officials involved in the horrible missed PI call that effectively put the Rams in the Super Bowl are from the Los Angeles area. Djoker and Osaka reigned down under. The Nashville Predators will travel to Dallas’s Cotton Bowl for next year’s “Winter Classic” outdoors game. And everybody’s favorite hockey player (ha!) Sid the Kid took home MVP honors in the NHL All-Star Game.

If you’re looking for birthdays, these are some of the people born on this day: Saint Thomas Aquinas, typeface inventor (which was basically like a coder back in the day) John Baskerville, expressionist painter Jackson Pollock, man who knew nothing John Banner, insufferable actor Alan Alda, Mexican businessman Carlos Slim, Frog-with-an-Oedipus-complex Nicolas Sarkozy, German rocker Peter Schilling, golf great Nick Price, musician DJ Muggs, hobbit actor Elijah Woodand Backstreet Boy Nick Carter.

Some events that happened on this day include: a 9-year old Edward VI succeeded Henry VIII and did a much better job from day 1, pirate Henry Morgan took Panama City from the Spanish, “Pride and Prejudice” was first published, Sir Stamford Raffles landed in Singapore, work started on the Eiffel Tower, Preston Tucker was found not guilty, Elvis made his national television debut, Roy Campanella was in a car accident that paralyzed him, The Who made their first television appearance as well, OJ Simpson went first in the 1969 NFL Draft, and most infamously today is the day the space shuttle Challenger exploded and killed all 7 crew members.

OK, now on with…the links!

Kamala Harris kicked off her presidential campaign. I wonder how many people she threw in jail because their kid missed three days of school were there. Heh, its California, so there were probably a few cheering her on.

This is a really sad story all the way around. We need to wean our kids from this technology addiction. Seriously, what the fuck?

Just so I’m clear here, will the left tell us if we don’t attack Venezuela that we’re Putin’s puppet? Or if we do attack, is the attack a deflection from the Mueller witch hunt inquiry by the Trump administration? Heads we win, tails you lose, Mr President!  But seriously, I’m going to be quite unhappy if we’re sending anything more than words of support to the people trying to get that asshole out of office down there.

Tom Brokaw says something logical. Now he regrets it after a blizzard of snowflakes attack him.  Jesus, people, this is pretty simple (opinion coming): those who assimilate to their adopted culture are going to be better-received and have a greater chance at success.

Some crazy coonass killed his parents and then three other people. He was caught at his grandmother’s house in Virginia. Oh yeah, and morons on Twitter said he was a Trump supporter and that I have blood on my hands because of the NRA.

“Forced”. You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means. But I expect the taxpayers to have money taken away and given to her.

This seems to be hitting a lot of Page 2s, but the director of “Bohemian Rhapsody” has been accused by even more people of sexual assault of minors. Or as we like to call it in the real world, “child rape”. (I added that last bit because the original story on Saturday from NBC said he was accused of “sex with minors”.

Anyhoo, two artists I like with birthdays today from different ends of the spectrum. So you get an eclectic mix of two songs. Here is the first one. And here is the second.

Have a great day and a great start to your week, friends.

Well we couldn’t have asked for better games. I mean, we could have asked for better officiating, especially at the end of the Saints-Rams game. But the NFL would sure rather have an LA team in the Super Bowl and these things happen from time to time. (In case you were wondering, by “these things”, I mean missing the most obvious pass interference calls as well as a helmet-to-helmet hit a full second before the ball arrives in the last minute and a half of a game on a play that would have effectively ended the contest because the team on defense were out of timeouts.  Un-fucking-believable.

In the other game, the Patriots did what the Patriots do. Nobody should be surprised by what transpired, only that it happened in a stadium outside of New England.  And so now anybody with a sense of fairness is resigned to cheer for the Patriots since the Rams don’t even deserve to be there.  Fuck, sometimes the world isn’t fair.

Down Under, Serena knocked out Halep a short while ago. Djoker is tied up at a set apiece, Federer had been bounced and Nadal is casually strolling through his side of the draw.  In soccer, Liverpool won a wild one and Man City won easily to keep pace. Spurs pulled one out at the death and Chelsea took it in the shorts.

Today’s birthdays include  Confederate general Stonewall Jackson, skeezy Russian Gregori Rasputin, Canadian hockey legend Georges Vezina, fashion designed Christian Dior, acrobat Karl Wallenda, bald man Telly Savalas, hilarious Englishman Benny Hill, the greatest golfer that ever lived Jack Nicklaus, scumbag asshole Eric Holder, billionaire Paul Allen, and least-known Spice Girl Emma Bunton.

Its also the day Louis XVI was executed by guillotine, Jimmy Carter pardoned nearly all Vietnam era draft evaders, and John McEnroe was expelled from the Australian Open.

I said all that to say this: here are…the links!

And this is why you never go to Canada in the winter.

The media were creaming their pants over this bit of fabulist journalism. Hell, they were still trying to parse its legitimacy even after Mueller’s office offered a pretty stern condemnation of it.

This entire story has been an excellent case study on Lynch mob mentality and how the media and its agenda-driven stupidity can be used for pure malevolence. I hope these kids manage to sue the piss out of everyone who has been involved in their character assassination. And I hope the case ends up in the hands of Brett Kavanaugh.  Totally fucking disgusting.

She seems nice. Although I don’t think her new lodgings will live up to her lofty standards.  But I think she’ll manage.

The Illinois Governor faces even more federal lawsuits over his campaign. I know you’re just as surprised as I am.

I’m sure this will go over well with the watermelons. Actually, I’m surprised its not a crime to publish that in New York.

Just in case you were wondering (or if you’re like me you hadn’t noticed) , the federal government has been “shut down” for 30 days now.  Keep it up, and eventually everybody will realize that the federal government spends way too much money on useless shit.

Apropos of no birthdays today, I’m playing three great songs in honor of a great three man group. And no, its not Rush or The Police or Green Day. Its something even better. (Depending on your tastes.)

Anyway, that’s the links. Enjoy Martin Luther King, Jr Day even though his birthday was last week. And because he probably wouldn’t enjoy what his legacy has been perverted into. So just enjoy the free day off, unless you’re working like me.

John Isner is out of the Australian Open, Liverpool regain form, James Harden ties a streak record (by being incredibly selfish in a losing effort), Michigan and MSU are on a basketball collision course, and the Blue Jackets and Sharks continue to surge.

Oh yeah, and the Chiefs ran wild, the Saints got a little lucky, the Cowboys showed up top late to the party and the Patriots…well, they did what they always do at home in the playoffs.  The conference championship games should be a lot of fun.

Mark Antony was born on this day. SO was rat-bastard Benedict Arnold, drag racing legend “Big Daddy” Don Garlits, actress Faye Dunaway, musician T’Bone Burnett, actor Carl Weathers, idiot Maureen Dowd, musician of note Chas Smash, movie man Steven Soderbergh, Ole Miss fan Shep Smith, Ladies Love Cool J, musical genius Dave Grohl, and actor Jason Bateman.

Its also the day Martin Luther went to college, the opera “Tosca” debuted, the Casablanca Conference began, American Motors Corporation began, Elvis Presley got his sergeant’s stripes, racist Democrat George Wallace was sworn in as governor, and the Sex Pistols held their final concert.

OK, on to…the links!

Donald Trump is possibly having too much fun at the situation Jeff Bezos has put himself in. Meh, so am I.  WaPo has become a laughingstock with their pants-shitting coverage and their “Democracy Dies In Darkness” self-congratulatory bullshit.  Fuck em.

House committees threaten to subpoena interpreters from meetings Trump had with Putin because…seriously…they’re afraid he has been a Russian asset all along. Oh yeah, and the media are covering it as some sort of great job restoring democracy or something, when all it is is a blatant partisan attack on the executive privilege he should be able to enjoy to stop the error-filled leaks in the White House.

Joe Lieberman and Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez amp up their war of words. Also, all you assholes giving Ocasio-Cortez a hard time for complaining about the cost of an apartment don’t get it.  Its not necessarily the cost of an apartment that’s causing her distress, its the fact that its her second residence that’s making it hard for her financially.  Lol, that’s what she tweeted earlier today. Because that’ll make people relate to her better.

PG&E’s CEO is out as the (government-guaranteed monopoly of a) company prepares for their bankruptcy filing.

Everybody has an opinion ahead of the sentencing of Jason Van Dyke this week. He’s the asshole Chicago cop who murdered Laquan McDonald in cold blood in 2014, in case you’d forgotten.

Oh, I guess this kind of thing is newsworthy now that the government is shut down. Nevermind that you read the story and the absence rate was normal that day and procedures weren’t followed. Nope, let’s blame it on the shutdown…because the TSA didn’t have a 70% audit failure rate for exactly this kind of shit every year they’ve existed.

Hey kids: don’t stay in school! Well, not always.

I don’t think I’ve been able to play a set of this birthday boy’s stuff yet. I’m kinda happy about today then.

Song Number 1.  Second Song.  The last of the set.

Its good to be Tim Tebow. Barcelona are out of the Copa del Rey. Tate Martell is considering a transfer. The (dreaded) Penguins are surging. And Andy Murray is going to retire after Wimbledon (if he can play that much longer). Which reminds me that the Australian Open is kicking off this weekend. I’d give my right arm if Venus Williams had one more slam in her, but I fear its gonna be the Serena show for a while again.

Today was the day Alexander Hamilton was born on.  He shares it with: Canada’s first PM, John Macdonald, father of American psychology William James, suffragist Alice Paul, South African writer Alan Paton, auto racer and legendary car designer Carroll Shelby, actor Rod Taylor, rocker Tony Kaye, golf great Ben Crenshaw, singer Mary J Blige, and jazzman Lee Ritenour.

It was also the day the following took place: the first life insurance company in America incorporated, Samuel Morse gave the first public demonstration of the telegraph, Romania annexed Transylvania, the first use of insulin to treat diabeetus was given, Bangladesh became independent, the Pretenders released their debut album, Ric Flair won the WCW/NWA Championship, and Trump called several countries “shitholes” a year ago today.

Alright, now on to…the links!

Man, I always hate it when “unwanted house visitors” show up places.  Although that’s not the term I would typically use for an armed intruder. But New York media gonna New York media.

Ok, this personal life shit is getting ridiculous. What’s next, Kamala Harris taking a dump and filling us in on global warming?

Well, this story is weird as shit. And by “weird as shit”, I mean its really weird as shit. I’m laying odds on a confession and claims of abuse in 48-72 hours.

Speaking of the aforementioned Kamala Harris, she seems pretty happy to admit she doesn’t pay much attention to current events. Especially, you know, when she’s in a position to effect them a great deal.

Gee, I have no idea how the Chicago government could be broke.  I mean, having nearly 15,000 employees make over $100,000 a year seems perfectly reasonable, right? (Protip for Chicagoans: do not start randomly clicking names in the chart and looking at what municipal workers make. You will reflexively break something.)

I’m providing the link to this one without any commentary at all, Other than to ask your opinions of the litigation and the motives of those involved in the process.

Not sure what kind of childhood the writer of this piece had, but her definition of “teddy bear” and mine are wildly different. Cool stuff, though.

Here you go. And I got shit for not picking this once before. And I’m sure everyone knew this one was coming.

Have a great day and a better weekend, friends!

You gotta feel bad for that Bears kicker.  Or not. But Cleveland and Philly fans Venmo-ing him money after the missed FG is a bit much. Tough way for one’s career to end. Elsewhere, the Chargers beat the Ravens (and now head to Foxboro for a date with Tom Brady. The Iggles, who were the beneficiaries of that missed kick will head to New Orleans to take on the juggernaut Saints.  And Indy will travel to Kansas City while the Cowboys travel to Los Angeles to take on the Rams.  The college season will end tonight in front of a half-empty stadium. And the NBA still doesn’t matter.

And as hockey hits its midway point more or less, the standings put the Lightning, Leafs , Bruins, Sabres, Caps, Pens, Blue Jackets and Islanders in current playoff positions in the Wales Conference, with Montreal nipping at their heels and the Jets, Preds, Avs, Stars, Flames, Army, Sharks, and Ducks in the Campbell with Vancouver, Edmonton and the surging MINNESOOOOODA WIIIIIILD just outside.  Enjoy the stretch run, gentlemen.

Oh, and I’d recap the FA Cup weekend, but there’s still a game to go.  I wonder if either will field a strong team though.

Happy Birthday if today is your day.  And by the way, you share it with: president Millard Fillmore, bluesman Bobo Jenkins, publisher (of a once-great magazine) Jann Wenner, Kenny fucking Loggins, actor David Caruso, libertarianish politician Rand Paul, person in movies Nic Cage, and Formula One great (but also a douchebag) Lewis Hamilton.

It was also the day the following took place: Galileo discovered the first three moons of Jupiter, Francis Bacon became Lord Chancellor of Britain, the typewriter was patented, the US government recognized Castro’s Cuban government, Jimmy Carter authorized bailout of Chrysler, and Bill Clinton’s impeachment trial began.

That wasn’t a lot of great stuff.  Oh well, on to…the links!

Socialist says socialism won’t create another socialist state. Interviewer doesn’t press the issue because that would be…what, racist? Mysoginistic? Making fun of a retarded person?  Hell, it must be something bad for Anderson Cooper to keep lobbing her softballs.  But in his defense, maybe he was still drunk from this three tequila shots he did earlier int he week. Oh yeah, and she also said Trump is a racist.

Hey, when the government goes back to work (with back pay for their vacation), can they just go ahead and leave this program on the scrap heap?  Nothing. Left. Too. Cut.

Looks like Kevin Spacey will have to appear in court for his arraignment  for felony sexual assault.  Quick question: how loose does someone’s pants need to be for someone else to get their hand down them far enough to grab their genitals, in a bar against their will? Without being seen by anybody else? And without taking an ass-beating on the spot?  That whole story sounds far-fetched to me.

Kurdish forces say they have captured two American men fighting for ISIS in Syria. Huh, and here I thought Lebron was playing for the Lakers.

The Chicago medical Examiner’s Office has a strange definition of “top priority”. Just kidding. I’m sure they’re really focusing on the shitty job they did for years.

Somebody needs to get Linda Sarsour and the rest of the Women’s March leadership on the phone. Because I’m sure they’re gonna jump right up in defense of this woman, right? RIGHT?!?!?!??!?!?

Well, I’m sure he’s familiar with the layout of the courthouse, so he should be on time to his hearing. Also, dude looks creepy as shit. But seriously, this guy is a hilariously bad criminal mastermind. No wonder he was a judge.

One of the greatest songs from the greatest arm wrestling movie of all time. And if you think I’m wrong, I’ll turn my cap around and we can settle it with our arms.

Have a great day, friends. And a great start to the week.