The boot stomping on a human face forever stomps a little less vigorously, though it still stomps. The Stars do have something significant to tell us this week. The Sun and Mars are in alignment with Mercury and Saturn. Now if Venus had been in opposition, this would have indicated an end to war, but we’re not that lucky. Instead there will be a historically important battlefield death this week. Those of you not on battlefields and/or not historically important can relax a bit.
Backstabbery and team drama continues as Mars hacks its way through Gemini. Ordinarily we could count on Venus to offset that a bit, but she’s off consorting with Mercury in Pisces, resulting in a general decrease in libidos. Aries gets its theme music. And Jupiter retrograde in Sagittarius continues to be a right dick. Did you ever know anyone who was covered in karma teflon? I had a fraternity brother like that whom I will refer to as Edgar. Edgar would constantly do stupid and/or criminal stuff and have the results of his actions land on someone else standing nearby. He would do things like walk out of a place without paying, and the owners/security would converge on the people who came in with him (the fucker still owes me for that, btw) but the best example I can think of is one night when several of us drunk bastards were being driven home by our sober-driver brother. Edgar rolled down the passenger-side window and whipped out the beer bottle he had just emptied… directly impacting the windshield of a parked (and occupied) police cruiser. The sober driver got hauled off to jail, Edgar stumbled away unscathed and unrecorded. Jupiter retrograde in Sagittarius is like that. The only real thing working for us in the sky is the moon in Virgo, and while it does give us some protection, it’s most beneficial for women (so of course less useful for us). It’s very good luck for any pentagram-wearing Wiccan lesbians who might be lurking.
This week’s draw looks remarkably good. We have two cards that are exactly the same in meaning as Jupiter retrograde; but in this case in context, it might actually mean less “overzealous prosecution” and more like “cop was too interested in donut to notice you speeding.” Literally only three number cards were drawn, so it’s going to be a big week and active at the end.
Aries: 5 of Coins – Love and lovers, concordance, affinities, material difficulties
Taurus: Queen of Cups – Success, pleasure, happiness, wisdom, virtue. This is probably the best possible draw for women.
Gemini: Judgment, reversed – deliberation, simplicity, weakness
Cancer: Ace of Wands – Creation, invention, enterprise, beginning, birth
Leo: The Empress, reversed – Vacillation, light, truth, the unravelling of involved matters, public rejoicing
Virgo: King of Cups, reversed – Injustice, vice, scandal, dishonest man.
Libra: Justice, reversed – Law, bigotry, bias, excessive severity
Scorpio: The Sun – Contentment, happy marriage, material happiness
Sagittarius: 10 of Swords, reversed – Advantage, profit, success, favor, power, authority — but all of these things will only be short-lived
Capricorn: 7 of Coins – money, business, barter, ingenuity, purgation, quarrel, innocence
Aquarius: Knight of Coins – Utility, responsibility, interest, rectitude
Pisces: Knight of Wands – Departure, absence, flight, emigration, change of residence
Comments
333 responses to “IFLA: The “Not as Bad as Last Week” Edition of the Horoscope for the Week of April 21”
w00t!!!
AND it’s your birthday to boot!
That whole “things going out of their proper sequence” can be beneficial (as indicated above).
The gun club across the street somehow gave me a password to register for the next orientation class, even though their waiting list is 12 years long and I only signed up in October. Maybe, just maybe I’ll need to start EDC shopping in earnest on Cinco de Mayo.
Also, this post was late, as predicted.
SCIENCE!
Your frat brother sounds like a dick.
Why yes. Yes he was. Unreconstructed can testify to that.
I had a “friend” like that as well when I was younger.
Ditto. That guy was a chaos generator on legs. Once I figured that out, I got as far away from his blast radius as I could. I was young, but even I understood that being around this guy might not be survivable.
“their waiting list is 12 years long ”
Isnt that the same as having no waiting list?
I honestly don’t know how they judge their attrition rate.
My Boss’s club just opened their waiting list this year. I spent about three hour there on an absolutely gorgeous Saturday and only two other shooter came to the pistol range, and absolutely nobody used the clay range. The 300yd range was closed for some sort of renovation. Their plinking range was empty. There was an organized steel shooting event at the 100yd range that was well attended. I guess they cut the membership off at “have enough dues coming in to keep the lights on” so as to make sure that members never have to wait for an empty shooting position.
I really feel bad for y’all that have to join ranges. I have always had the run of the land to shoot whenever, however I wanted. I have done a bit of shooting on organized ranges in competition but I much rather not having to do that.
Depends on the prestige of the organization you want to join. The waiting list for the Melbourne Cricket Club is 20 years. In 2015 there were 242,00 on the waiting list and in 2018, the waiting list dated to October 200.
The waiting list for the Marylebone Cricket Club is 27 years.
Sounds like the waiting list for NYC public housing. Only there’s a good chance it will fall apart or be torn down before you’re in.
Need more rent controls and a board to select best fit tenants
Correct!
“Libra: Justice, reversed – Law, bigotry, bias, excessive severity“
Glad I’m a white guy. There’s some black Libras that are going to get capped by the popo this week.
I’m not sure how to read that. Does it mean I’ll be less of a shitlord this week?
I think it means that karma is going to make you pay for being a Shitlord.
“Virgo: King of Cups, reversed – Injustice, vice, scandal, dishonest man.”
Do I get to do this stuff, or is it done unto me? I need to plan the week accordingly. Thank you.
I second this,
No problem with the vice part.
Today Zelenskiy was elected President in Ukraine. He starred in a TV series The Servant of the People where he played a Ukrainian President! I found one of the seasons online.
This timeline we are living in is too silly to be real.
Huh. Higher production value than I used to for video from the Ukraine.
Gemini: Judgment, reversed – deliberation, simplicity, weakness
I’m going to a corporation tomorrow to conduct an audit. Haven’t heard from the Controller confirming the schedule. The bank is telling me “This audit has to happen this week” and the Company is telling me *crickets*.
So I’m going to drive to downtown LA and pay for parking and show up in an office building and hope it all sorts out. Contingency plan; go to Philippe’s for a sandwich, hard boiled egg, and a beer.
I feel I’ve got the deliberation and simplicity down. Weakness? Probably the hard boiled egg. Oh, and now that I’m thinking about it, maybe hit a few breweries in downtown. Beer. Beer is the weakness.
First, skip Phillipes and go a few miles to Langers deli over in Westlake. Thousand times better and only twice the price.
Dated an accountant and she said she would would bring about five large boxes of “files” to an audit and a thermos of coffee with a dozen donuts. She’d act like she was settling in for a long haul slog. Then she’d plant a minor infraction about 5 files deep. When they found that, the auditors bloodlust would be sated and they feel good about avoiding the huge mountain of work she seemed to bring. Client would pay the minor fine he had already anticipated. Everyone was happy.
Leo: The Empress, reversed – Vacillation, light, truth, the unravelling of involved matters, public rejoicing
Dude.
Absolutely love the Reverse Empress.
Do you fucking love it?
I’m still trying to figure out which position the Reverse Empress is.
It’s where you are the one being lifted by the palanquin bearers instead of her.
I’ve lived a timid life.
She has a glory hole in the seat of her throne and you’re underneath it doing the work.
I eat ass.
That would be the Anal Empress.
No shit.
HM buggered it up.
Temporary power and success could be good news for my internship application for the summer. Still waiting to hear back after my interview last week.
3 months could qualify as “short lived” right?
Absolutely
“Absolutely love the Reverse Empress” AND “public rejoicing”
You Big City folks are certainly different from us bumpkins. One or the other is enough for deplorables
Update on Easter dinner: the ham I got was magnificent. Far and away the best one I’ve had since leaving Texas, and maybe the best ever — I’d need to try another from Readfields in Bryan to verify.
Meat curing glibs: why was this ham so good? It obviously wasn’t brine-injected to add weight since very little water was liberated on heating. It was remarkably not-salty (probably goes along with the not brining thing). Fantastic texture and flavor (light smoke, mostly tasted of pork). The meat-to-H-bone ratio wasn’t great, or was that why the meat was so good (but hard to remove?)
Bone does add a lot of flavor to meat. Maybe they actually smoked it instead of just marinating it with liquid smoke as they probably do with some lower quality hams.
From their website, they’ve lowered the salt levels in their products. Most small production products like this use higher quality meats and take a longer time with less smoke for a milder smoke taste.
I’ve ordered some Irish cut and beef bacon from their website. If it’s as good as the ham, I’ll spring for the pork loin.
Interesting. Canadian bacon with some Irish Whiskey in the cure.
Not something I regularly watch, but I have had a few lol’s @ this interview.
Looking forward to some purgation this time.
I’ve been digging into the timelines for the supposed Russian hack of the DNC, and it does not add up. Supposedly the hacking began in early April. The DNC found out about it at the end of April and hired Crowdstrike on April 29th. Yet Crowdstrike apparently doesn’t set up shop until May 5th, which coincides with when they start billing the DNC. The DNC pays for an observation service where security specialists actively monitor the servers 24/7, and would see all traffic going in and out. And yet, the last Wikileaks emails are from May 25th (mid-day on a work day, hmmm…). So the emails are downloaded 20 days after Crowdstrike sets up a state of the art anti-malware system and starts monitoring all traffic. Then they wait until June 10th to finally take the system down and replace it, and everybody gets a new password.
So how were the emails stolen right under Crowdstrike’s nose… and why is the last email dated 16 days earlier than when they finally reset the system?
Then in June we see the DCLeaks website set up (supposedly by the rooosiaaannnss), Wikileaks announcing the emails, the DNC announcing the hack, the first attempt at a FISA warrant to spy on Trump (which is declined by the court), Guccifer 2.0 coming on the scene claiming responsibility and showing some documents to prove it, which oddly(!) don’t show up in the later actual Wikileaks documents. I think it’s very interesting the Guccifer 2.0 shows up with this “proof” the day after the DNC announces the hack. The “proof” documents are innocuous, real, and yet don’t coincide directly with the leaks. Almost as if they were pulled from the system by somebody who had access to the system, but didn’t know exactly what documents had been taken.
The whole thing really stinks. There were a lot of shenanigans going on.
Heya Riven and Mojo:
Happy Birthday!
Thank you! Interesting musical choice!
At the in-laws for Easter feast. Everybody in good health and good cheer. Just poured 3 ounces of Jim Beam into my coffee. Happy Easter, everyone!
Happy Easter!!
Happy Easter! I shampooed the bedroom carpet. There’s a rack of lamb marinading in a garlic, herb, mustard and olive oil concoction, and an old bottle of Bordeaux standing up.
Better not be one of those Haut Brions you’re saving me.
I still have five of those. I’m opening what I think is my last half bottle of ’90 Leoville Las Cases.
Mmmm, I remember those. Interested to see if they’ve held up.
We made a run to the wine locker yesterday and rescued 9 bottles of Cote-Rotie.
I also have four 750s of the Leoville.
“Give Notre Dame a Modern Roof the Alt-Right Will Hate
Medieval Europe was a crossroads of global influence, not a mythical all-white past. The new Notre Dame should reflect that.”
https://www.thedailybeast.com/give-notre-dame-a-modern-roof-the-alt-right-will-hate
*taps out*
What do you find objectionable about that?
I find strawman arguments to be pretty weak.
How is it a strawman? The very definition of “far-right” is a belief in palingenesis.
What does Sarah Palin have to do with it?
There is no “very definition” of far-right. And who, exactly, among the people that are commonly being labelled far-right these days is arguing for a return to the Middle Ages?
Of course there is. Just as “progressive” ideology defines the far-left, “reactionary” ideology defines the far-right. This might not line up with your idiosyncratic definition of the terms, but this how they are used in common currency.
lolno.
Far-right means “we should be like the middle ages?” Whose middle ages? Do far right Mexicans think everyone should go back to worshiping Quetzalcoatl?
That’s kinda the point of the article.
That’s kinda the point of the article.
Maybe I am dense, but I take this…
as the point of the article. I am sure there are those who would want that, but I am pretty sure the age of modernity (mentioned previously in the article) was not started in the middle ages. If the few brain cells left firing in my noggin recall correctly, that was the enlightenment which was after the middle ages. I don’t know what she is talking about. I say let the church rebuild their church however they want. It has nothing to do with me or society.
So you are saying Phil Collins eats ass?
You are what you eat.
Not to mention that many, many ultra-right movements advocate some flavor of guild-based national syndicalism as a “third way” between capitalism and socialism, up to and including folks like Menicus Moldbug and the other “neo-reactionaries” (which is a term that makes sense, as opposed to the “alt-right”.)
Pick one.
I don’t follow.
The phrase “far-right” is used mainly (overwhelmingly so) by people who have never heard of any variant of Moldbuggery.
The only way he could be an example of common currency is if you are using a jargon definition of common currency. Which would be utterly delicious, don’t get me wrong. But the beliefs of an fringe are not the beliefs of the majority.
Besides which… exactly how is this applied? Hitler was a medievalist because he liked torches and banners, is that it? He wasn’t exactly proposing that Germany be divided into peasantry, merchants, clergy, and nobility.
I mean, maybe Japanese and Arab ultra-nationalists (which seems to be a much more common definition of far right) would like a society more ordered along medieval lines, but I somehow doubt that.
And then of course, Franco and Idi Amin are no longer far-right by this definition
Hitler was a socialist, not a fascist. He just approached it from the position of it being a national identity, not a Communist global one. That was the source of a lot of tension between he and Stalin. Hitler wanted to turn Europe into Germany, run by his National Socialist party, Stalin wanted to spread Communism throughout the world. Potato, potahto, but enough of a difference to make them enemies.
“if time had a race, it would be white”
https://twitter.com/LilithLovett/status/1120011504290394112
They should put a minaret or two up there.
If literally everything is a tool of white supremacy, wouldnt that imply whites really are supreme?
Come on people. Now time itself is evidence of white supremacy? Will the space-time continuum be evidence of white supremacy next? If you start claiming that the very fabric of reality upholds white supremacy, you’re basically arguing that whites are the master race chosen by God. But if you don’t want them making that argument, you’re the racist.
Ugh. This is exhausting. Pour me another.
Troll or mentally unbalanced – hard to tell any more.
What if we could save it in a bottle?
That would make Jim Croce a white supremacist?
Relevant, and I love this scene.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=T9GFyZ5LREQ
That’s great. I guess I should start paying attention to movies more, this scene flew right by me.
The derp runs deep.
“Sagittarius: 10 of Swords, reversed – Advantage, profit, success, favor, power, authority — but all of these things will only be short-lived.”
*Kiff sigh*
“There is no excuse for terror attacks against innocent people but as a journalist I saw Western Christian missionaries unscrupulpusly converting Buddhist orphans for food and shelter after the Asian tsunami. Don’t send your prayers.”
https://twitter.com/AndyWestTV/status/1119898964772446210
Christ, what an asshole.
Maybe we should talk them into wearing special vests and giving the ultimate sacrifice?
Western and only Western. Yup.
Having had my boots on the ground at that very place and moment of history, I can say he’s right.
However, I don’t see what this has to do with fuckall considering that fact that I doubt any of the Sri Lankans who died were Western missionaries in Phuket et al..
And would it really be appropriate to point that out a day after they got blown to smithereens even if they were the same people?
“A Damore-like figure emerges within Microsoft, except this time it’s a female manager who is sick of having to discriminate against white & Asian male employees”
https://twitter.com/clairlemon/status/1119787649596661760
“Microsoft staff are openly questioning the value of diversity
Some Microsoft employees are openly questioning whether diversity is important, in a lengthy discussion on an internal online messaging board meant for communicating with CEO Satya Nadella.
Two posts on the board criticizing Microsoft diversity initiatives as “discriminatory hiring” and suggesting that women are less suited for engineering roles have elicited more than 800 comments, both affirming and criticizing the viewpoints, multiple Microsoft employees have told Quartz. The posts were written by a female Microsoft program manager. Quartz reached out to her directly for comment, and isn’t making her name public at this point, pending her response.
“Does Microsoft have any plans to end the current policy that financially incentivizes discriminatory hiring practices? To be clear, I am referring to the fact that senior leadership is awarded more money if they discriminate against Asians and white men,” read the original post by the Microsoft program manager on Yammer, a corporate messaging platform owned by Microsoft. The employee commented consistently throughout the thread, making similar arguments. Quartz reviewed lengthy sections of the internal discussion provided by Microsoft employees.”
https://qz.com/1598345/microsoft-staff-are-openly-questioning-the-value-of-diversity/
That manger and a bunch of people are about to say hi to the unemployment line aren’t they?
“literally the worst thing ever unleashed onto the internet. i take an edible and debate with @ArmouredSkeptic.”
https://twitter.com/shoe0nhead/status/1119930963247677440
“A Very Special Debate”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=se_js0A4OCQ
“The Unspoken Homophobia Propelling the Transgender Movement in Children
When I was a Ph.D. student in sexology, I had a conversation with a colleague that forever cemented, in my mind, why I needed to speak out against the transitioning of children with gender dysphoria. Nowadays, every left-leaning parent and educator seems content to take a child’s word at face value if they say they were born in the wrong body, not realizing that by doing so, an important conversation is being brushed aside.
On the day in question, our research lab had just finished our weekly meeting, and I chatted with my colleague as I packed up my things to head back to my office. He had told me previously about his son, who from the moment he was born, announced that a mistake had been made—“I’m a girl,” he would say.
As a little boy, his son loved playing with dolls. He would wear his mother’s dresses and high heels, and wanted to grow his hair long like Princess Jasmine from the movie, “Aladdin.” At school, he preferred the company of girls to that of boys, who were rambunctious and mean. After many years of therapy and fighting constantly about the course of action they would take, his son had come out as gay.
I grew up as a straight woman in the gay community, at a time when homophobia was rampant in North American society. I witnessed the harassment and ignorance that my friends faced on a daily basis. Most, as a result, hid their sexual orientation from anyone outside of the community, and few were openly out to their families.
Although things have definitely improved since then, discrimination against gay people still exists. And as I’ve watched as glowing stories about transgender children have flooded every progressive news outlet over the last few years, every one of them appalls and saddens me. Because the underlying story that the public isn’t privy to is that many of these children would have grown up to be gay, but are instead undergoing a new form of conversion therapy.”
https://quillette.com/2018/10/23/the-unspoken-homophobia-propelling-the-transgender-movement-in-children/
https://twitter.com/DrDebraSoh/status/1118733368625995778
What the actual fuck? Please someone tell me that’s not really a thing.
It’s a real thing. She’s a real scientist.
You have a problem with Dr. Ruth, you have a problem with me, asshole.
To be fair, gerontophilia isn’t my kink.
But whatever floats your boat.
Ph.D of Sexology sounds like something Zapp Brannigan would make up.
I thought that was Prince?
I always preferred the company of girls, too. And I had long hair. Similarities end there.
I have seen that for a while now, that people would rather think their children are the other gender than think they’re gay.
This is totally nonsensical to me.
They’re little kids. They do not have sexual preferences yet. They likely would just grow up. Maybe a some would be gay, but you can’t tell from the toys they like or the way they wear their hair FFS. Let them be kids and the chips will fall. Ain’t nobody born with a preference for something they can’t even conceive of for the next 10-12 years. It’s like pronouncing a three year old a crack head. Maybe, but not now.
Still. Not. Crazy.
“Police are searching for some stupid bitch at Coachella after she threw a bunch of newborn puppies in the garbage. Wow this made me mad.”
https://twitter.com/stillgray/status/1119825010850353152
https://www.foxnews.com/us/coachella-puppies-dumpster-caught-camera-california-search-animal-cruelty
That’s rough.
At least she didn’t litter.
Whelp, I’m done here.
Whelp, I’m not sure how much lower she can go.
C’mon, there’s more puns up in this bitch.
I don’t know, I think you’re all barking up the wrong tree.
DiMaggio?
This is going to dog her for years.
The cops are on it. They’ll collar her yet.
They’ll keep her on a short leash.
Those dogs won’t hunt.
“Make scaphism great again”
About an hour later, a passerby named John was rummaging through the trash discovered the puppies still alive, according to officials.
Not to say it’s unbelievable that some scumbag would do this, or even very shocking, but I also wouldn’t be surprised if this turns out to be another hoax like the “homeless man” donating twenty dollars to a stranded couple. So does that make me cynical or optimistic?
When I was a kid, you’d take a box of puppies down to the supermarket, hang out in front and give them away to shoppers. It’d take a half hour and they’d all go to good homes.
Yeah, it just seems unlikely. Unlikely that she’d be such a sociopath, unlikely that he’d discover them just like that. Unlikely that she was caught on camera in such a graphic but not easily identifiable manner. Seems too pat. Seems staged. I’ll wait to see whether “someone” opens up a crowdfunding drive for the guy.
Rhywun: I know you’re around.
Your team is dominating.
No spoilers.
Carlton won!
Ha not following that yet this week either. Too much hockey.
Not around the blighted sportstown I live near. @#$%$#@&*!!!
Well, none of our teams are winless now…
Empty net goal!!!
*barf*
Are you a Leafs fan, or do you just hate the Bruins?
People root for the Leaves?
I root for the Wind to blow them over to the neighbors house.
Not people,Ted. Canadians.
Yes.
Well, not really. More the latter than the former, I guess.
Socialism is short for social media. Did you know that?
https://www.foxnews.com/politics/ocasio-cortez-impersonator-green-new-deal-socialism-twitter-video
I could absolutely see AOC saying/doing exactly this
That’s an incredibly effective video because it nails the actual AOC’s often child-like take on things, particularly climate change, and her incessant use of “like.”
I’m also slightly bothered by the use of the small child for this as it as just as inappropriate as the adults who exploit their children as climate change activists. Unfortunately, childrens’ crusades seem to be a thing, again.
Yes and usually by “won’t someone think of the children” folk
Yeah, that was my thought as well. Let kids be kids. Couldn’t help but laugh though.
https://twitter.com/SonnyBunch/status/1119713115602661376
OFFS
Yay, for lumber Jills!
Needs to be a porno.
Probably already is.
NSFW
https://hotnudeteenmodels.com/sexy/1002850/Horny_babe_in_lumberjack_shirt
NSFW
Needs some sammiches. I’ll make them, if she’ll eat ’em.
She can handle my wood.
Nice:)
I…uh…umm…got nuthin.
Fun comments though.
“Six large rolls? More like cis large rolls”
“And literally costs less than 70% of the man-branded paper towel rolls for the same work”
“I’m outraged that they only included women born with both arms”
I laughed so hard a blew a snot bubble.
Do Maxipads next.
Stealing this joke from the homeboy, Seamus (FreedomToons), but I find it appaling those three women are paid $6.99 to the man’s $10.79.
I would just like to take this opportunity to point out that despite feminist claims that we live in a patriarchy, it appears that big companies are tripping over themselves to hire more women, put more women in prominent positions, and cater to women.
cop was too interested in donut to notice you speeding.
He’s doing a good job. He deserves a doughnut.
That’s why Canadians have good driving records.
Scorpio: The Sun – Contentment, happy marriage, material happiness
I suppose zero out of three ain’t bad.
It’s the forecast for the coming week. Of course, you’re in Japan, so it’s either the horoscope for next week or maybe two weeks ago. I forget how that date line thing works.
So I’m getting a bottle of whisky, a new job and a new wife next week? Should be exciting.
Let me know when the bachelor party is popping.
Yoshinoya at 10 am sharp.
Aw hell yes, the land of that glorious ambrosia, the gyuudon.
You don’t want those things. Sets the bar too high for the following week.
Holy fuck, proof again today on how well I married this time.
SP has been binge-watching “Pasta Grannies” on YouTube. And now she’s in the kitchen rolling out pasta and making fresh ricotta. Said ricotta will be mixed with Asiago, lemon zest, and nutmeg, then used for ravioli.
And you didn’t even have to tell her to do this?!
Children have a lot of energy.
I blame ADHD.
I made vegetable lasagna today. Making mozzarella and ricotta from scratch does not seem worth it the effort, imho.
It’s very much worth it, especially if you can get someone to enact your labor.
Whereas I couldn’t be arsed to open a package of chicken breasts to grill on my Foreman grill…
Understandable, you shouldn’t be arsed since Ted groped you during your birthday hug.
When I reach around, it’s in a completely gentlemanly manner.
Isn’t it your bday? Your husband should be cooking or taking you out.
Money can be exchanged for goods and services.
Leoville with the rack of lamb was a triple Curley.
#Genderissocialconstruct
#TooManyCarbs
Sometimes you just need some onion rings. It happens. Just do it where the rings are epic.
Time Lord of the Onion Rings
7 more pounds and Im gonna rape a Big Boy. Or Sonic.
Not an Economist linked his earlier tweet in the morning lynx. Dude is still holding strong. Almost like Andy Kaufman. Almost.
https://twitter.com/AndyWestTV/status/1120064690896474118
https://archive.li/d1CMg/b70ded8194e2c0113379b07eed4ebe9e735b3d8f.jpg
NSFW.
Ouch! Not safe for straight dudes, fuck work.
Ok.
NSFL.
Honestly, I can’t imagine that shot even appealing to women or gay men, either. I imagine they like images that don’t use a “c” light.
Who finds that sexy?
You could just say, “Christ, what an asshole”. It’s morning here, bruh.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5J7IrPVLc4U
I…uhh….umm….I may label your links now in the same category as HM’s
(I do miss the guy and fish thing, tho’)
This guy and fish thing?
https://archive.li/E5h76/37b6b62b9c5a4b1168c4e59c84d2ce22ca6dc795.jpg
NSFW.
At the first inkling of wrinkled skin, I bailed out. Sometimes, slow internet is a good thing.
See above.
Sorry, I’m such a fucking pig.
https://www.salon.com/2019/04/20/journalisms-assange-problem_partner/
TW: salon
“Calling Assange a journalist is problematic”
“Internet makes everyone a publisher, that doesn’t make everything a journalist”
And much more: the author subscribes to the view that journalists get the freedom of the press and that if we let bad people like Assange, who embarrass the government, get journalistic freedom then it will strengthen calls to limit freedom of the press. In other words self censor and abandon those with extreme ideas or we might loose our freedom.
RESPECT MAH AUTHORITAH!
Shorter Salon:
EVURTHING IS PROBLUHMATIK
KOMMUNIZM 4EVAH
“I’m not reading from a script here. I totally talk like this all the time.”
It shall be done.
Chrome is a shit browser.
Change my mind.
Why, exactly, have you been browsing shit?
I was going to do a relevant picture link here, but I figured the male perineum was enough for one night.
You’re welcome
Best liquor store in the universe.
https://www.yelp.com/biz/bush-bottle-bin-glennallen
Liquor? I barely know her!
About halfway between Palmer and Tok. Pretty country out that way.
First time I ever visited, in December, I stopped there and picked up a 12 pack. The beer was warm so I just left it outside my room at the Caribou Inn for about 15 minutes and it was perfect. Then I watched reruns of Seinfeld.
Oh, to find a job that would allow me to live in Copper Center. I could leave all this shit behind and go quietly into the night…
Imagine all the beers in the left cooler being considered “fancy imports” and paying twice the price.
https://s3-media4.fl.yelpcdn.com/bphoto/V3HYvcZrtcT7-KSOzQM2Hw/o.jpg
I like wandering around Shibuya on about my fourth Asahi tallboi observing the gaijin perimeter.
Who needs Coors? (jk, me; I need it)
Kawasaki or GTFO. You’ll have to wait another year, though.
https://tokyocheapo.com/events/kanamara-penis-festival/
Next time I’m in Nippon, we’ll get hammered on Suntory premixed highballs and go to a Soapland.
Those highball cans are excellent. My wife probably thought I was drinking a beer.
I’m singlehandedly trying to ruin efforts to rehabilitate the “Ugly American” image BTW.
Wherr da hoors at?
Step right this way to Kabukicho and Yoshiwara, good sir.
I hope Mojeaux gets the deep dicking she so richly deserves on her bday.
Respectfully.
And yes, I might’ve finished off the remaining Dewars White. No one else was gonna drink it.
EXCELSIOR
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-2vbPsEwvhf8/UZ93E7YybEI/AAAAAAAALBE/05THgS-9X-g/s1600/a-motivational-funny-posters-3-10.jpg
Twice.
Damn straight!
Now that’s a celebration of life!
Felicidades to Mr. Mojeaux.
Damnit, she’s already made a mockery of our family friendly reputation with her perversions, don’t encourage her!
I’m sure it was very tasteful: soft focus, low light, romantic music. None of that buck-toothed ferret-humping you might expect from less dignified commenters.
Wellll, there is the five kid minimum to be Temple worthy in the Mormon church. That kind of pressure doesn’t leave a lot of time for the kissy, kissy stuff.
It’s a JOKE, a JOKE I tell ya!
*in my best Foghorn Leghorn voice*
I went to church and didn’t post one dick joke! Whattaya want from me?!
Dick jokes.
You talked your husband into a threesome? You gotta teach me how.
Here ya go.
https://i.pinimg.com/736x/c9/25/e7/c925e71577eede3dacee25e8163c39a9.jpg
Thank me later.
You want to talk your husband into a threesome? Sick fuck. And on Easter, no less.
It’s not Easter anymore. It’s Ass Monday.
Going with the Reverse Empress?
Has anyone seen Replicas? Any good?
Female parent fornication theme music!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XrcpYtAjwGM
Confirmation bias? Sure, but Dershowitz seems to nail it here.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=doo193ngU8c
Need a verdict. Is this NSFW or not?
I would think most HR departments would say that is NSFW
It has “porn” in its name.
That’s hysterical. Yeah, NSFW.
“quarrel, innocence”
Basically, this just describes the wife and I. We’re both Capricorns. I’m the innocent part of course.
Oh yeah, feels good being a Taurus since we got Queen of Cups – Success, pleasure, happiness, wisdom, virtue. Hope that transfers to my current job hunt. I forgot how much I didn’t miss the jigoku that is waiting for the companies to reply.
So, I’m drinking this new (for me) beer, named Mural. Watermelon, lime, hibiscus, agave. Is this hipster juice?
That is a most definite yes.
Quench the thirst of your inner beatnik hipster.
Next thing you know, he’ll be expounding on all the different flavors of Kombucha.
Damnit. I’m going to have to drink a quart of Steel Reserve in a paper bag now. On the front lawn. Am I redeemed then?
Is there a rusty engine block on the front lawn?
If you piss in the front yard, yes.
I would, but I might be gang raped by the elderly neighbor wiminz.
Sounds like a solid plan to me, my man.
Is there any mayonnaise in it?
I sure as hell hope not. What’s even worse, it’s pink. *lowers head in shame*
Pairs well with avocado toast (18.95 a slice) and manbuns with chopsticks sticking out (priceless!)
I lol’d.
The funny thing about avocado toast is that I was eating it fifteen years ago as an appetizer at cocktail hour. And now somehow it’s a thing.
That’s not funny in the least.
It’s damned funny. The hipsters are now into something that went out of vogue over ten years ago.
It’s the hyperbole. If you said it wasn’t funny, he would be saying it is, just to be contrary. Trust me on this one.
He’s one of “those” people, is he?
No, I wouldn’t.
Yes, you would.
I’m drinking my fourth John Daly. It’s an Arnold Palmer with vodka. Good game going on with Sharks and Knights. Chili almost ready.
Haha. John Daly. Great name for a drink.
Hmm, so that’s called a John Daly. I know I’ve made them before.
And I might get crucified for this, but… On hot summer days when my friends and I are sitting on the back porch grilling, I like to mix up a shandy. It’s not like I use extraordinary craft beer or anything; it’s usually just Yuengling Lager. I just find them intensely refreshing.
I made one a couple of years ago and it didn’t work for me. Now a Greyhound made with fresh squeezed ruby grapefruit juice, daaammmnnn.
Ha! I was looking up the provenance of the name as I thought it was something my brother and his friends made up, but it looks like Daly actually formed a beverage company to sell them in cans after a bartender in Florida made it up during one of his runs.
Nice. I would drink the hell out of that. Vodka tea was very popular in my Buffalo college days.
How is that beer?
The hipster juice? It’s OK. Not something I would drink again, but I can probably finish this 6 pack.
I think you may be sucking a vegan’s cock.
Straff bringin’ the sledgehammer.
He had it coming.
Now that’s some phrasing, right there!
?
That’ll stiffen him up.
That doesn’t sound vegan.
More like gaygan, amirite?
Here, more vegan friendly version: I think you may be sucking a vegan’s cucumber. A bit longer, but gets the job done all the same. *Preemptive Ka-chow, phrasing here*
https://archive.li/7LGrV/ac68a6dff503ed894e295f3946157109eb0b16cf.jpg
NSFW.
Sorry, you’re locked in here with me.
Weird flex. but OK.
For my fellow late-nighters: Good evening. And, a happy birthday to Mojo (& Riven?).
Don’t forget Jesus’ second birthday, unless you’re…one of (((them)))
No, I can assure you that Andy West would really hate me.
Can’t say I think very much of him, either.
Have you availed yourself to the shirty films?
Not yet. I’m barely “online” on weekends.
/i.e. using a browser
And a hearty top o’ the evening to you, Sir.
C.–Good evening/morning (wherever you may find yourself). Thank you for the Gabapentin input this last week. And, to the others who did so.
The rest of you can go screw.
Wait, I was one of those, so I can’t screw?
Whether you can or can’t is up to you/outside factors. I’m not giving you any orders on the matter.
And yes, you deserve much thanks for your input.
Hope it helped.
Indeed, I didn’t say this earlier and mea culpa, but Happy Birthday Mojeaux, hope you had a splended birthday.
splendid*. English is hard, folks.
I’m an excellent editor in English. Writing it on the fly, not so much.
Love is a many splended thing.
What about Splenda?
Okay. I tried, guys. But I’ve been barely functional this week with my various degrees of gimpiness and then the holiday this weekend screwed me up worse. So I don’t have Woke Charmed 3 ready yet. I’m hoping that I can get it done tomorrow but I have no clue how long the editors need it submitted in advance, so I’m not sure if it will be up on Tuesday. But I will get it ASAP! This episode is so incredibly retarded that I need to be functional enough to do it justice.
If you have SP’s e-mail, she can get it up same day if she she’s available. I’ve done tight timelines before here.
Okay! That would be awesome. I was hoping we could move it back to evenings because people were saying they wanted to drink, so if they could swing that it would give me a little bit of a buffer. I sent an email to the editors and to Riven but it was on Friday afternoon and I’m in pacific time so I think I missed everybody.
I’ll try to track down SP’s email. I think she’s emailed me before but I have to look back through my inbox.
Do you have SP’s email? Like I said, she’s the one that gets shit done, when she isn’t busy.
It looks like I don’t. Could you email it to me? My email address is my handle (all one word, no punctuation) at Outlook.com
I’ll just DM you, that looks like scam e-mail /hides in the shadows.
The gout or sexgames? Mine is from the gout, sexy, right?
Was it all the gout, Alfie?
Mine is a side effect of demonic possession. It happens when you invoke the ancient rites to try to summon SMOD.
Yeah, same thing happened to my niece.
OK, something is REALLY weird with the reply button–every time I try to post a reply, the site simply refreshes/acts like it is posting a comment.
For you and everyone else Sir Digby. But the formatting is right.
Someone is very angry with us, I take it. I didn’t notice your comment until I made that lower post.
Then again, the computer I’m using has/had some issue that reared it’s head when I restarted the thing….Ugh. It’s always something.
It’s okay, take your time and I’m really looking forward to it! They’ve all been fun and hilarious reads.
I’m willing to wait if need be. I almost wet myself reading the first one MLW. Do whatever you need to do. I’m hoping for a repeat performance.
“my various degrees of gimpiness”
Do you have a leg injury, or is this a BDSM thing?
I just hope it’s posted at night.
Yeah, I asked if they could move it to night and I haven’t heard back yet. But if they do, that will also give me a little more time to finish it.
Totally read that as, “my various degrees of pimpness/pimpiness”.
Of all my mis-reads, I love that one most.
Something IS wrong here…When I try to post responses to comments, the reply fiend is staying at the bottom of the screen, instead of “coming up” to the original post. Did this just start recently?
Do you have monocle or eypiece installed? If so, make sure you don’t have ‘Hide Old Comments’ checked.
I have no idea where to find that…check box(?)
I did have Hide Old Threads active at the bottom, and I changed it so that it shows Hide Less Threads.
Didn’t affect anything that I can see.
I’m not you’re IT guy, so I hung up, but you can talk to me it seems…
Yeah, whatever this crap is, it’s making me go to the bottom if the screen to respond, as if it were a new comment, instead of a response (what I said earlier).
I have no idea how to interact with monocle, other than the buttons on screen at the bottom.
It’s all bottoms with this setup, tonight. Did Q get involved somehow?
I dunno. just wish I had someone I could make inside jokes about my short films with. Hrrumph. (I had lots of ham and beer today, merry Easter Sir Digby)
Point taken. I have my internet browsing routine, but, I will get to them soon.
And, merriest of
ChristmasesEasters to you, too.There was some discussion about this in the morning thread. It’s the result of a WordPress update.
Ah! Thank you, Chafed. Glad to know it isn’t my setup here at work.
“Social media influencer is convicted of hiring his homeless cousin to break into a man’s house and steal at gunpoint his internet domain name”
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6945143/Social-media-influencer-hired-cousin-break-mans-home-steal-internet-domain-name.html
Is that how we got this place? I didn’t ask any questions…
Inquiring minds want to know!
Which is why they are inquiring…
/redundant is redundant
Makes me think of my great aunt who smoked Pallmal 100s and read the Enquirer every day.
Joan, or, Margaret?
“Social media influencer is convicted of hiring his homeless cousin to break into a man’s house and steal at gunpoint his internet domain name”
I’m no criminal mastermind, but I just can’t help but wonder how he figured that cops would never figure out who to question if the guy did transfer the domain.
He certainly appears to be a deep thinker. I’m sure he had a cunning plan.
Been up 19hrs and had almost as many beers. Find them golden eggs glibs. Huzzah!
So, The Blaze/Chris Enloe: When reporting on military incidents, it does nothing good to say that soldiers “were armed with high-powered assault rifles”, in the current global political climate.
While it make be technically correct (yes, yes, Mr. Bureaucrat), you could have just as correctly called them “combat rifles”, or, simply “rifles”. But, of course, you have to stoke the base through some light fear-mongering*.
*I’m sure the soldiers were a bit scared at the time.
So they had those dark thingies with the thingy that goes up? How absolutely terrifying.
Hey-they are the Loud-Killer!!!1!
/God, I love that video!
That is a great one.
According to Wikipedia, the Mexican Army uses either a 5.56×45 or a 7.62×51 as the standard battle rifle.
It always amuses me to hear those calibers described by media nitwits as “high-power”. If JournoLists did their fact checking, they would know that those calibers are actually on the smaller end as rifles go, and hunting rifles typically use far larger calibers like a .300 Winchester magnum. The .223 is actually not legal for deer hunting in some states, not because it’s “too powerful and would blow the animal to smithereens” but because it’s believed that it doesn’t kill quickly enough and causes the animal needless suffering.
I had always heard that the .38 was originally a hunting caliber (medium size prey) . Is that not correct? I’ve owned an SKS in the past, but never fired it, so I don’t know much about its* power.
The .223 is know fairly well, as I’ve enjoyed the hell out of my AR for a few years. But, yeah–this “high-power assault rifle” crap was used for some right-wing fear mongering, when you consider the source. Which is a damned shame, considering most people who would read it/have read it there would, more than likely, be pro-2A. Since the Blaze doesn’t show comments any more to un-registered readers, I have no idea if this was called out by anyone.
*differences in the various versions of 7.62 taken into account.
Im just surprised The Blaxe still exists. I thought Beck was losing quite a bit of money on it.
The Blaze just got acquired/partnered with Mark Levin’s outfit. Guess that means they are currently solvent (for our purposes)? From what I can tell, they’ve had $ come in recently, and are themselves acquiring right-side talent (i.e. Steven Crowder).
Don’t know if anyone else will find this interesting, but, if you like some amateur internet sleuthing, give this a whirl.
It’s sorta much ado about nothing. Still, someone is actually trying to prove/debunk a mystery.
If anyone needs a dose of puppy livestream cuteness, check out:
https://www.twitch.tv/welpen_noh
/a German channel, but cuteness knows no national lines. OK, maybe Myanmar.
Happy Earth day, you dirty hippies.
We’re all gonna die – https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2019/04/21/earth-day-2019-climate-change-humans-global-warming-weather-rising-water/3507125002/
Goddamned. Has this stupid motherfucker been to the beach lately?