Because of the serial weekly reading of sedrahs from the Torah, sometimes the timing gets a bit weird. I mean, here we are in the dead of winter, just finishing the goyish New Year’s, and the reading this week is the Moses origin story, which really belongs in springtime when Pesach rolls around. I blame Trump.
In any case, this week’s sedrah is euphoniously called Parshot Shemot (or Shemos if you’re old-school Ashkenazi). And action-packed it certainly is- this isn’t one of those sedrahs that’s stuffed with arcane legalistics, there’s shit happening. And most of it is Moses’s pre-bugout stuff. It’s the first sedrah in Shemot, aka Exodus, and I will note that “Shemot” means “names.” The Jew names for the books of the Torah are generally taken from the first significant words in the book, which in this case are “v’ayleh shemot.” Now, you might ask, why didn’t we call the book “V’ayleh”? Because that means “and these are…” which isn’t as cool as “names.” Anyway, the referred-to names are the guys from Joseph’s family who came over to Egypt (which we Jews laughingly call “Mitzrayim”) during the good years there: Reuven, Levi, Simeon, Judah, Issachar, Zebulon, Benjamin, Dan, Naftali, Asher, Gad, and Rudolph, who had a BIG red nose and guided his brethren on the right path to get to Egypt.
Most of the story of Shemot will be familiar to anyone who has seen The Ten Commandments, so rather than rehash the stories of Charlton Heston and Yul Brynner, I’ll point out a couple bits that didn’t make it onto the silver screen. We all know that the Pharaoh died and the new Pharaoh didn’t like Jews very much. Interestingly, his objection (if you believe the Torah) was that the Jews outnumbered the Egyptians. Now unless the Jews were even more prolific than rabbits, this claim seems a bit dubious. But it’s in the Bible, so it has to be true, right? The Pharaoh then did what any good politician would- noting that if you subsidize something, you get more of it, and if you tax something, you get less of it, he levied (pun!) a tax on the Jews, and created the Egyptian version of the IRS as an enforcement mechanism. Apparently, this was insufficient, so the Egyptians enslaved the Jews. You might ask yourself, “How does this make sense? If the Jews outnumbered the Egyptians and were more powerful, how could they be enslaved?” And you’re going to Hell for even asking that question. The answer is not explicitly given, but my hypothesis is that the Egyptian Jews, like American Jews, tended to be strongly progressive. So they succumbed to guilt, totally unable to bring themselves to resist an onslaught from Egyptian shvartzes.
The Pharisees, of course, did their usual tortured logic to explain things- using some remarkable reasoning, they deduced that every Jew lady had 12 kids. I’m not even going to try to walk through this, it’s as stupid as 9 lawyers in black dresses deciding that raising wheat for your own family falls under the interstate commerce clause of the constitution. I’ll go with my Progressive theory.
Another bit that didn’t make it into the DeMille epic was Yahweh equipping Moses with miracle stuff to prove he was on a mission from God. Yeah, the movie showed the old staff-into-snake sleight of hand, but in the original, Moses’s miracle was putting his hand into his shirt, then pulling it out to show that he suddenly had a major case of leprosy. Once the gross-out sunk in, he would then put his hand back into the shirt and pull it out, now un-diseased. This was a cool enough trick that Moses was a winner in Penn & Teller’s Fool Me, and got him the Vegas invite.
Of course, the movie DID have the whole Burning Bush thing, but… really, in the universe of miracles, that was a pretty low grade one.
Another bit that kind of glided by in the movie was Yahweh’s direction for the Jews to loot Egypt on their way out.
Each woman shall borrow from her neighbor and from the dweller in her house silver and gold objects and garments, and these you shall put on your sons and on your daughters, and you shall empty out Egypt.
Reparations! I’m getting a bit more sympathetic to Pharaoh.
Yahweh, as usual, continues to be an asshole. As Moses and his family head back to Egypt to confront Pharaoh, Yahweh inexplicably tries to kill Moses, apparently because he hadn’t cut off the end of Junior’s wee-wee. Mrs. Moses does so, throws the bloody tip at Yahweh, and that’s the last we ever hear about this unfortunate incident.
Jews are strange. But you know the rest of the story, lots of heart-hardening and then Plagues. But those come next week.
I’ll wind this up with a passage from the Haftorah. Reminder: the Haftorah is a reading from the later books that somehow is supposed to relate to the Torah portion. Confusingly, the Sephardic and Ashkenazi Jews have different Haftorah selections each week. This is from the Ashkenazi one:
Woe is to the crown of the pride of the drunkards of Ephraim and the young fruit of an inferior fig is the position of his glory, which is at the end of a valley of fatness, crushed by wine…These, too, erred because of wine and strayed because of strong wine; priest and prophet erred because of strong wine, they became corrupt because of wine; they went astray because of strong wine, they erred against the seer, they caused justice to stumble.
For all tables were filled with vomit and ordure, without place.
Pretty much describes our New Year’s Eve.
Comments
200 responses to “Jewsday Tuesday: Fake New Year”
Jooohs!!!
First.
That was pretty lame there, Mick.
But it counts so fuck you.
The East German judges disagree.
Those guys are straight up racist.
The true anti Semite wouldn’t put an “h” at the end of Joo. Unless you’re Whiny The Jooh, my kid’s favorite bear.
my kid’s favorite (((bear))). ftfy
it is three right?
As a matter of procedure, he kinda DID comment on the article.
A d yet no theme music was offered.
Reading these posts imparts so much insight into why OMWC is…the way he is.
You’ll understand better when you grow up.
But then she won’t care because you’ll be a distant memory.
Between these articles and Seinfeld lays all my knowledge of Judaism.
And double stamp Fridays?
If you want to learn more, here is the authoritative book on the subject.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/1578987407/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_FpclCbE0X2D4D
That’s why I drink beer instead of Wine
Is this where the report comes from that a Jewish lady’s favorite wine is “I want to go to to Miami”?
I thought it was “Daddy I want a new car!”
Yeah, it’s called a Saab.
Yahweh inexplicably tries to kill Moses, apparently because he hadn’t cut off the end of Junior’s wee-wee.
Christ, what an asshole.
In the movie, it is pretty obvious that Yul is jealous that Charlton is going to win the affections of the totally hot chick. How DeMille and the costumers kept a nipple slip out of that movie is hard to understand. Come to think of it, every Biblical epic is always dripping with sexy women.
Well, the original is sex-packed. So naturally…
Wife makes shirts https://imgur.com/gallery/yi1vyRN
Also, urban meyer is an asshole and it saddens me that the Buckeyes won the rose bowl. Sorry sloop, but I’m not a fan of your team.
hook em’ horns!
Georgia is gonna fuck up the horns.
I’m not a fan of Texas either.
*cough*
Yeah. You may be right, but there’s a whole mother half to play and georgia has made some of the worst punting plays possible.
Having so many haters makes winning that much more enjoyable.
I’m so indifferent that my indifference does even give AF.
Not caring is the first step towards enlightenment.
then you can call me Bodhisatva because I have no idea what they’re prattling on about
Looks like Georgia is getting pronged.
Waste not want not. Using my new miter saw (it’s my first power saw) to cut down the Christmas tree into coasters. So far so good
I thought those for cutting the peak into tall hats
If that wood is wet at all the coasters will warp, dry the wood first
Live and learn. Thanks Yusef for the advice. I almost cut off a thumb when the wood jumped on me…but it’s all good
Fool Me?
They aren’t singular you know, and the trophy “F M” wouldn’t be near as endearing.
“Woe is to the crown of the pride of the drunkards of Ephraim and the young fruit of an inferior fig is the position of his glory, which is at the end of a valley of fatness, crushed by wine…”
The reader of the book of Jews of Egypt of old is confused.
I didn’t even try the parsing of that.
I can handle double, triple or even quadruple negatives, but that many ofs (how do you write “ofs”?) in a sentence is absurd.
As you can see, for whatever reason, the translator tried really hard to keep to the original Hebrew syntax.
All I can make of that is Ephraim has a hangover.
Change that “has” to “will have” and you’ve pretty much got the gist. The hangover being the razing of the Kingdom of Israel’s capital by the Assyrians.
Oh, it’s a prophecy? Now I get it. BTW, Biblehub is not my favorite porn site.
Laziness?
That or fear of retribution for mucking it up. Ran into that problem when I translated the Koran into Pig Latin.
It could have been laziness; or it could be that there is something important about the syntax of the original verse that has meaning in the overall text, and since we’re not biblical scholars, we don’t grasp it’s importance (or necessarily care); or it could be as simple as the publisher wanting to market a translation “as close to the original as possible.” I mean, people get crazy over their biblical translations. A whole host of people not only believe that the King James Version is the best translation for aesthetic reasons, but that the translation itself was divinely inspired. Who knows?
Pretty sure that is a long winded way of saying what I said.
Had I seen your comment, I would have just written “ditto”.
Yeah I was just being flippant. I dabble in language enough to recognize all your points.
I’d buy your translation of the Koran. Make it illustrated and I’ll buy two.
Heh.
Wow, Chick has updated their website to a recent decade since the last time I saw it.
https://chick.com/information/article?id=is-gods-word-restricted-to-english
Ok…
I was raised to speak an old dialect, and I come from an aloof religious sect, so I’ll admit that the KJV easily sounds right to me. I’ve visited with other movements and heard their translations and their hymns, and it’s all wrong to me, like a “blues” written in a major scale.
Not that I have any religious notions any more, but it is sweet to the ear. Yeah, verily, some older speech is just right:
Then I commended mirth, because a man hath no better thing under the sun, than to eat, and to drink, and to be merry: for that shall abide with him of his labor the days of his life, which God giveth him under the sun.
or
Judge not, that ye be not judged. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.
That is tangy and just stays with you . . . half a century. . . so pretty!
I can sympathize with that. Which is why, to me, the KJV just sounds like downscale Shakespeare compared to the “Bereshit bara Elohim et hashamayim ve’et ha’aretz…, complete with cantillations, of my youth.
Man, I was so hoping that was going to be Chick.
“That’s just whataboutism!!!”
/Democrat Party in 2018
“Woe is to the crown of the pride of the d’…
Even young Agile had to start somewhere…
It’s tough to pick just one:
Agile Cyborg|2.1.15 @ 9:43PM|#
To be fair, sir, the jester shakes the foundations of that which you are concerned with… The jester is, often the fuckin hero, actually… bro… because the jester does not ingratiate him/herself with the societal strictures… they often are the first to die in iron-fist cultures actually…
http://archive.li/XgsuW
JOOOOOOOZ!
appropos
Classy-hot is the best hot.
“Despite the news of the Holocaust, which was discovered in parts of Europe four months earlier, America still viewed itself as an Anglo-Saxon Protestant society which manifested hostility towards people of Catholic faith and Jewish ancestry.”
Citation needed.
And she’s a hottie.
Crazy life. I only knew her as a frequent Match Game punch-line.
SP and I binge watched several seasons of I’ve Got A Secret. Although Henry Morgan was our favorite because of his cynicism and overall crankiness, Bess was bright, witty, funny, and pure class. A delight to watch.
Oh yeah! Now I remember her from that too. But only from some recent airings on late late nite GSN. I really dig those old game shows, where the banter was witty and the money was an afterthought.
But I grew up with Match Game so that is what I remember the most.
I would be happy to let 8 and 19 clean my rifle.
Has Hamas asked for equal time?
Does This Burka Make Me Look Fat?
Danielle Crittenden wore a burka for a week during her daily life in Washington, D.C.
would
Oh FFS. I see the beburkaed going about their business every day in my neighborhood in deepest darkest middle-class Brooklyn.
mostly OT: We’ve been wading through (((Mrs Maisel))) on Prime. It’s not great, but the rest of the TV world is even worse * tired shrug like Jack Benny * What do Jews think of it?
I love the writing: a good line is a good line no matter how poorly delivered, and one comes along about every three minutes. The plot is tired, but I like the mishmash of characters. But it seems over-acted with that ratchety pace common in community theater.
And then there’s the evergreen culture question: what is the authentic level of Jewishness? Even though my parents live in an Orthodox neighborhood two blocks from the yeshiva and despite my dad’s being a merchant, I certainly have no vote in this whatsoever. It just reads wrong, forced, not confident; and the direction seems as if they all read Annie Hall but never saw it. Everybody’s different; there’s not standard; opinions different- but, I guess, what I’m really asking is “can a real Jew tell me what’s wrong with this cause it just doesn’t roll right.”
(((Mrs. Maisel))) is a Would.
Also, I haven’t really watched it so I don’t know how “authentic” it is.
I avoided that show for a long time because I assumed it would be a feminist cliche, but I was wrong. There’s a little of that, but… The writing and characters are mostly fantastic.
forced, not confident
Now I think I know what I meant: subtle is funny. Don’t explain the punch line; hell, don’t even finish the punch line: trust my intelligence. So, also, don’t tell me you’re Jewish, just show me.
So, I guess: writing flaws. The episode this week> Priest (re new bride): “I baptized her when she was seven days old.” I doubt any priest has ever / would need to say those words. Simply: “Known her long? I baptized her!” Any more is to imply we don’t know even the basic Catholic sacraments. This example isn’t about Jewish American culture, but this is the kind of thing that drives me crazy.
Conversely: “Kominsky Method” on Netflix. Michael Douglas is flat and unbelievable, but he’s the tide on which Alan Arkin washes in. Arkin being Arkin is just hysterically funny . . . I can endure any plot device and any performance while I’m waiting on his next line. . . do watch this.
Now I think I know what I meant: subtle is funny. Don’t explain the punch line; hell, don’t even finish the punch line: trust my intelligence. So, also, don’t tell me you’re Jewish, just show me.
Yeah, I agree. I also fell into the “deadpan or just not funny” debate about 3x per episode.
Overall, I found it mediocre. My wife stuck with it a bit longer but bailed out by the end of the 1st season.
My wife & I have enjoyed it, in part because she’s one of (((them))) and some of the humor hits home.
We _just_ finished season 2 and I laughed out loud at parts (Susie is profanely awesome), but de gustibus , etc.
Oh, but season 2 ended with a strong hint they’re going to fuck up her father’s character by making him have some political story line, which would be a mistake. He’s great as is and making him some 1960 version of woke would be terrible.
Felt the same way.
And season 2 was better than season one. Very funny I thought.
Incidentally, what’s wrong with this picture?
For context, Midge & her mom have just picked up meat for Yom Kippur – in particular, lamb because the rabbi is coming over and lamb is his favorite.
I’m going to assume the rabbi keeps kosher…
separate bacon counter and implements ?
As a practical matter, I don’t think you could do that – you’d essentially need two entirely separate work spaces and would have to ensure they pork never “contaminated” the kosher meat by touching it, etc.
The color blue didn’t exist until 1952?
In practice, much like Julian Edelman, the characters are “Jew… -ish” (much like my wife, for that matter). I.e., socially Jewish but not particularly devout.
The rabbi, on the other hand…
That’s set in 1959, so that part is historically accurate.
If you want to know who rules you, find who you can’t criticize.
https://twitter.com/AnujChopra/status/1080094281501736960
It’s the old, “You have free speech, but you aren’t free from the consequences!”
I grew up (in a conservative synagogue) using the “old-school Ashkenazi”, as you put them, pronunciations. It was a while before I knew that the “real” way to pronounce the tav/sav was with a t not an s.
Bris. Shabbos.
I’m half and half myself, but my education was Ashkenazi. So I can’t think of an ass as a tachat. It will always be a tuchus to me.
World Dart Championship on BBCA. Crazy they have entrance music and dancing cheerleaders.
The place is packed.
2017 championship
Can’t stand Phil Taylor. MvG seems like a cool guy, though, and he’s better than Phil when both are at their best IMHO.
MvG vs Michael Smith I can’t see getting tickets to go watch live, other than the massive amount of beer.
You gotta love that they encourage crowd noise during play. That would make golf so much more tolerable.
When I watch darts I have to look for the “slow” button on my remote.
I’m surprised NHS isn’t a sponsor.
Pretty cool machine and one heck of a ride.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2aCOyOvOw5c
The fight against the machines has begun. Will you choose a side or just die on your knees?
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/12/31/us/waymo-self-driving-cars-arizona-attacks.html
Wypipo, SMDH
It was Odo?
*checks hue* Sure!
I’m still pissed that DS9 will never get the HD treatment like TNG did.
And here we come to the meat of the story. I have always thought the driverless-car future is a fantasy and one of the reasons is highlighted in this article: a certain segment of the population won’t let it happen.
the driverless-car future is a fantasy
Barely related point: I weigh most things in utility and don’t think of anything as ever entirely going away. We have cars, but some people do indeed still buy buggy whips. And we’ll never run out of oil; we might run out of $50 oil, but, like gold, it will always be around for those willing to pay for it.
That’s a really good point. New technology doesn’t seem to entirely displace the things that come before it. People still write letters (I’m sitting here looking at two fountain pens), ride horses, drive cars with manual transmissions, heat their house with wood, and listen to vinyl. Also, people do stuff like make their own beer, make their own soap, grow their own vegetables, and do their own home repair. New options might be added that change the way people do things (like new tech) or remove people from the necessity of doing it themselves (like manufacturing, for instance) but there will always be people who prefer the older things or prefer the DIY route at least for novelty if nothing else. Driverless cars will increase market share, I think, but they’ll never replace human-driven cars no matter how much they improve.
I was really pissed off by the lane-maintenance on a car I rented a few weeks ago: scared the crap out of me and fought me when I wouldn’t use my turn signal.
Now I’m thinking I want this on my next car: super handy on the interstate while texting. I love to drive and have been several kinds of “car guy” in this life, but now suddenly I am looking at the new tech. And maybe my parents need to trade for this as well?
Also I’ll admit that automatic transmissions sure are nice on ice, especially when I’m trying to keep a high-torque beast between the ditches. Otherwise, shifting your own remains primal to my sense of driving. But I’ve already confessed an attraction to 1925 or so as the year when the level of gun and car tech was correct and manly.
I once converted an automatic to a 5 speed manual, dropped the single carberator for dual side- draft carbs. Lots more mods went into that before I was done.
As usual, those dirty protestants mistranslated this as
. Which doesn’t mean out numbered, but that their were more than before. (Note, I was to lazy to look up the Catholic translation, King James version was the first that popped up, so I went with it.)
Explains why they found the tiki torches in the pharaoh’s tomb.
I don’t have a goyish bible handy, but the original verse 9 in Hebrew has the Pharaoh clearly saying that there’s more Jews than us (Egyptians). “And them Hebes is mightier as well.”
OT: https://kval.com/news/local/osp-trooper-nic-cederberg-shot-12-times-on-christmas-night-files-30-million-lawsuit
1) police have no actual duty to protect anyone from criminals. Well established at this point.
2) this is on ID channel’s Body Cam series right now. Dash cam/radio recording of his dispatcher informing him the suspect was armed, in response to his query. Oops. So much for the claim that he wasn’t told that the murder suspect wasn’t armed and dangerous.
So, first, I’m sorry he was hurt and I hope he ends up ok with no lingering effects or anything. That said, I thought the argument police make for everything from being armed to shooting people who aren’t actually armed is that every single interaction they have with the public could result in their imminent death since they never know if someone is armed or not.
Realized tonight my The Adventures of Brisco Sounty Jr. DVD set is missing. GOSH DARNIT!!!!
I vaguely remember something about an orb. I dunno, the network treated that show so shittily I could barely keep up.
Yeah, that’s pretty much it. Gomez Addams had helped Brisco look for the sphere in a Wild Wild West type setting.
Make yourself some nikomi ramen. You’ll need the set and: Chinese cabbage, mushrooms, negi, abura age (fried tofu), buta yaki (pork) and whatever else you like. The Tonkotsu is my favorite, but you can do miso, soy sauce, salt versions. Warms you up and is pretty easy.
https://imgur.com/a/Px0dNsg
That looks delightful.
Yum. Recipe?
Can’t find an English version, but if you get this, just follow the pictures on the box. I imagine you can order it from the states.
https://www.amazon.co.jp/永谷園-煮込みラーメン-とんこつ味-2人前×2回分×3箱/dp/B07G31KVJY
Sorry, this item can’t be shipped to your selected address. Learn more. You may either change the shipping address or delete the item from your order.
Have to keep an eye out at Asian markets here I guess.
Ugh. Suppose you could make a pork bone stock soup and add the ingredients yourself. Problem is the ramen is specially made not to disintegrate even after being in the soup a long time. Regular ramen would get all mushy.
“Raw Men” “Get Mooshy”…Ok
That guy in blue on the front… Is that endorsed by a sumo wrestler?
Speaking of which, I just watched a compilation of Chiyonofuji matches the other night. Kind of interesting. I think he’s my fitness role model – he’s super muscular and moves around guys twice his size.
Can’t see the kanji, but he’s certainly a sumo guy. Usually they endorse chanko (similar dish).
I like to make something like chanko with chicken, beef meatballs, shrimp, tofu, shiitakes, onions, daikon, and other vegetables. I usually use napa, but I might try it with baby bok choy next time.
I know that chicken is the only “correct” meat since a sumo wrestler is supposed to be on two legs. But sometimes I prioritize what tastes good over what’s traditional. Also, I can’t find enoki mushrooms anywhere in Ohio (not even at the Japanese market) so I use shiitakes instead.
It’s a pretty healthy meal – lots of protein and vegetables. Plus it’s easy to make.
I didn’t know that’s why ate chicken. Yeah, chanko is throw whatever the hell you want in the pot and go to town. Very hard to screw up.
Regular grocery stores around here carry these, which seem to be fairly close to enoki:
http://www.hokto-kinoko.com/whats-kinoko/bunapi/
Says Whole Foods carries them nationwide.
Cold snap here. Chanko sounds good.
Georgia’s ox is getting gored.
It hasn’t been possible for me to be right about this game since the first quarter
When will Japan deliver common-sense car control?
The newspaper reports the man told authorities that he had perpetrated the act “in retaliation for an execution.
erm . . .
These nearly detail-free hot-takes are really starting to grind my gears.
I wonder what I hated about them.
I’d say the pressure to be first without being wrong leads to these creative vacuums.
Those events are completely unrelated, but let’s stick them together because it’s fun.
Just when you think that whole human trafficking thing had boiled off, Trump comes to the rescue.
Turns out, 1 in 800 people in the United States lives in modern slavery!
And suspected child-sex trafficking increased 846 percent between 2010 and 2015!
Fear not; great humanitarian DJT45 is on the case: “Under my Administration, the Federal Government will continue to play a leading role in the fight against human trafficking,” Trump’s proclamation said.
The phrase is a broad term used to describe victims of forced labor, sexual exploitation or servitude, and forced marriages, among other abuses.
One of these things is not like the others.
Also, can we pin one of these people down to explain the difference between forced marriages and arranged marriages?
As long as they don’t screw with my human trafficking the other 11 months of the year.
https://www.msn.com/en-us/movies/gallery/101-movies-you-need-to-see-in-your-lifetime/ss-BBA0RB6?li=BBnb2gh
okay, I’ll bite: when else could I possibly see them ?
I your deathtime, I’m guessing is the answer.
https://archive.li/LUI06/40a7b6c75ae999e81affeecd994734e561897bb9
https://archive.li/LUI06/d6bea2fa6b24d76cb3d51c44d47a296d13a188e8
https://archive.li/LUI06/9f85ea47c9ae9ab7903d7a1853711148a94e03f6?retry=1
https://archive.li/LUI06/b83554df5563264170f433028ad7c8623a97c5a9
https://archive.li/LUI06/815298a9eda809c58d1837f5fe5532898eb16f13
https://archive.li/LUI06/bd2d937ffc6b17e41c2c8447b80291f5a2f80dd5?retry=1
https://archive.li/LUI06/65dc62f378d02f4f3e1feeb09d7ae92ffd30a09a
Winner.
I”m glad that you do you, but I just fear someday you’ll wind up like this.
Embrace the dark side CPRM…
I think the part I’d embrace is probably the pale side, given how tanning and undergarments work.
how undergarments work in India
Great headline. Ridiculous story.
I blame it on Rio.
I didn’t know Japan was that fucking sick.
Gen gap raises its head again.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=qi_e1hF484E
You’re always so theriouth.
Some quality nudity in that movie. A high-point of my adolescence.
A buddy took a first date to that movie. There wasn’t a second with that girl.
WTF, Texas? You’ve won, stop with the stupid fouls.
Incidentally, what’s wrong with this picture?
I love looking for anachronisms in movies: cuffed pants before Edward, modern utilities on buildings for old settings, and just weirdness (like supposedly two-pack-a-day smokers who can’t manage a Zippo with effortless grace)
Until last Saturday I was a pack and a half a day smoker, and Zippos never fuckin worked for me.
What happened Saturday?
I started vaping.
I’ve been assured by Top Men that vaping is as bad as smoking! Worse, even!
Yeah, but it’s cheaper, for now…
The ads running these days caution that smoking cessation vaping is dangerous because it contains nicotine, which is addictive.
I like to think it’s all fine, I’ve not done the research, the people in charge know what they’re doing, and taking precautions against some groundswell of nicotine addiction by way of vaping is just sensible public policy. I like to think that, but.
Hell, my drinking will kill me before anything else, it is the will of Allah. (now I’m an untouchable minority FTW)
And millennials don’t vote absentee because they don’t know where to buy stamps…
Are you comparing Zippos not working as advertised to being too stupid to know where to buy stamps? You must work for Big Lighter.
A Zippo is haaaaarrrd. JTFC.
Like packing a semi trailer: the dumbest people I know nail it several times a day!
“backing”
typing is haaaaarrrddd?
Your typo isn’t wrong either.
Is that supposed to be a response to me?
just bullshit piling on; really, you’re just helping me make fun of myself and my relatives
the irony is I carried a Zippo as a teenager, so that thing where kids practice stoopid shit like juggling poker chips or flipping a fedora onto your head . . . I did the cool Zippo moves; never had a skateboard, so wanna throw knives?
so: the oddest sort of self-deprecation = I’m just like my toothless uncles
FWIW I’m never gunning for anyone, I’m just fucking around; if anyone’s gunning for me, I probably don’t even get it. Glibs is always a positive experience the way I read it (the way I optimistically project myself into reading it)
My brother, who only occasionally smokes a cigar, is a Zippo collector. I, as an actual smoker, tried using a Zippo for a while, and that was one of three times I set myself on fire, and my thumb hurt like a son of a bitch.
I got tired of always worrying about if they had enough fluid, flint, or wick left. It was easier to just pick up a 99 cent BIC lighter that would last for a month or two.
^^This. (and I never set myself on fire after filling a Bic and accidentally spilling some fluid)
Big Naptha haz a sad
I gave up on Cross pen refill quality the same way and just settled on the best value disposable pen I could find.
Those are my go-to too.
When that dreadful Interview With A Vampire was filming outside shots in New Orleans, they had a Hell of a time trying to get all the neighborhood to take out their window ACs. It was Summer and our usual >90°F with >90% humidity. Production eventually went around handing out $100 bills to residents who wouldn’t budge.
Damn, Holly Rowe is, uh, robust.
she got thicc the past three years
super competent sports reporter from what I’ve seen of her SEC work
Damn, the Texas mascot got feisty before the game – almost took out Ugga and some photographer caught a horn in the shoulder.
And ‘Damn’ is apparently my interjection of choice this evening.
Common-sense bull control dictates that the state of Texas minimize its risk by not underwriting such dangerous activities.
But state-sactioned stupid shit is an old tradition at both the flagships schools.
FWIW, one bull handler knew what he was doing: notice his deflecting 1,500 pounds of bad news by simply steering the steer, grabbing a horn just in time.
Speaking of sumo, may favorite is Maenoumi.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mainoumi_Shūhei.
“Mainoumi initially failed the Sumo Association’s physical entrance exam, because he was too short to meet their height requirement, which at that time was 173 cm. He got around this by persuading a doctor to inject silicone into his scalp, giving him the necessary couple of centimetres.”
He, he.
https://detail.chiebukuro.yahoo.co.jp/qa/question_detail/q1057232150
I am not sexually aroused by that at all.
Sarcasm or lie?
I’m watching a video of a Chevy small-block being rebuilt, totes works for me but YMMV
My backpack always had three things in it. A canister of cotton, a canister of wooden matches dipped in wax, and an eye drop bottle filled with lighter fluid. To this day, I have a flint and steel in my fishing vest and in my car. Getting your ass kicked by a Zippo lighter is a sad.
Yes, that is sad. But having a shitty lighter that costs 20x more than a BIC that works everytime because it makes you feel cool, is just as sad.
My trolling here is done. ?
It’s not Organic Free Range Trolling. Sad.
Zippos are a pain in the ass. I’ve owned one. I’ve gone through many, many cheapo Bics. What I own currently is a decent jet lighter for cigars.
My daily use lighter is a Scorch triple-jet cigar lighter and so far (about a year of daily use) it works a treat. It’s the very 1st jet lighter (both cheap and rather pricey) I’ve had that lasted more than a couple months. With 3 jets, it consumes a lot of fuel but it works very well. When I smoked cigarettes, I carried my grandfather’s old Army Air Corps Zippo with his unit Deep-Freeze Squadron shield. It always worked flawlessly.
I’ll leave you with OMWC’s theme song.
Was expecting this.
Hibbing was hometown for both Puckett and Dylan?
It’s getting quiet in the east. Do we have any Californians or Cascadians?
Pie wakes up in a minute; Japan will probably work later.