Thursday morning “damnit I am making breakfast here” links

Dear reader,

Due to a slight mishap involving heavy drinking, and choosing between watching a recording of the Survivor Finale or Impeachment Hysteria…I picked drinking.

Signed, 

Sorry about that.

Links for today…well, who cares about anything else, really.  Its pretty much what you will talk about anyways.  Its all going according to plan.

If you did need something else to chat about I have this.  Give me your best insult along the following parameters:

  •  Cannot contain any of George Carlin’s forbidden words.
  •  No racial, ethnic, or sexual epithets.
  • Thats it.  No swearing, no calling somebody an Indio.

Example:  You are the damp and dirty washcloth I toss in the hotel trashcan out of respect for the housekeeper’s humanity.

Comments

490 responses to “Thursday morning “damnit I am making breakfast here” links”

  1. DrOtto

    Late links let me be first!

    1. JD is Unemployed

      Congratulations, sentient station wagon.

      1. Pope Jimbo

        Have some respect for KITT’s grandpop!

  2. JD is Unemployed

    I posted about having a sad the other day and then “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist” and a couple of other people said nice things which made me feel warm and fuzzy but by the time I got back to the internets glibs was like 3 or 4 new posts deep so I just wanted to say thanks and that’s very cool. Looking forward to today’s thicc.

    1. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

      You always brighten my day, JD

      *seductively winks*

      1. MikeS

        hubba-hubba!

      2. JD is Unemployed

        *blushes, playfully twirls hair around fingers and bites lip while making swoony eyes at TGA*

  3. leon

    At least your momma loves you.

    When you pay in advance….

    1. Bobarian LMD

      But not as much as she loves me.

      1. Private Chipperbot

        How’s your wife and my kids?

  4. well, who cares about anything else, really

    Actually, that’s what I don’t care about. I’d like other news not related to that.

    1. Not Adahn

      Would you like to talk about Star Wars spoilers instead?

      1. No.

        We got anything from BBC Pidgin?

        1. Not Adahn

          Gunz?

          Whoever posted that link to classicfirearms.com should get a commission from them, since I bought an Anderson lower in order to build a 9mm PCC that takes CZ75 mags.

          More hate for NYS: PSA won’t ship complete lowers to a NY non-LEO FFL. I can only imagine what hind of legal bullshit some AG put them through to get that policy put in place.

          Question for Glock guys: Who makes cheap but good magazines? I won’t have a CZ75 mag adapter until January at the earliest, so I’ll probably need to buy a couple of Glock-compatible magazines to QC the build until then.

          1. Sean

            Glock, duh.

            I also have some Magpul & ETS that seem decent.

            Avoid those “Korean military”.

          2. I second Glock. Because Maryland is stupid I buy extra mags when I go see my FIL in Texas so I can get standard capacity, and I want to say they’re like $8 a pop or so. I mean, dirt cheap and they feed reliably.

            Never used Magpul for the pistol but I’ve got a Magpul AK mag in 30 that does just fine. It gets a little chewed up by the SKS where the mag latches into the receiver but that’s likely because it’s got the AK-style conversion.

          3. Not Adahn

            Among many annoying things, I have to buy NY-compliant mags.

          4. A Leap at the Wheel

            I don’t own any, but my understanding is you get Glock for flush-fit and Magpul for standard capacity 30 rounders.

      2. Social Justice is Neither

        Didn’t that happen about 8 movies back?

        1. Not Adahn

          *flashes back to the Reagan adminstration*

          A wee young rat is standing in line to go see The Empire Strikes Back. A group of teenagers come out from the previous showing, loudly exclaiming “I can’t believe Vader is Luke’s father!”

          I was too small to beat them to death.

          1. A Leap at the Wheel

            Walking out of an early showing of whatever Batman movie had Gordon fake his death, my friend turned to me and loudly said “I can’t believe they killed off Gordon!!” in front of a bunch of teenage fans.

          2. “Gordon’s Alive?”

            /Brian Blessed

          3. l0b0t

            Dispatch War Rocket Ajax!

          4. zwak

            Alfred Hitchcock once said to a friend, while riding in a full elevator:

            “I can’t believe the old man bled so much…”

      3. Suthenboy

        Star Wars spoilers? They have made the same damned movie about 5 times in a row.

        Vader is his father! (another Hollywood bunch with family issues, say it aint so)
        Luke is a girl this time! (whoa! didn’t see that coming!)
        We are killing off. your favorite characters! (about fucking time)
        If you thought that character was cute and charming, wait until you see this one! (zzzzzzz)

        *hides behind chair waiting for nerds to start throwing eggs*

        1. Certified Public Asshat

          All I really know about Star Wars is that you have to hate everything about it to be a real fan.

          1. Not Adahn

            Nono, you have to hate approximately one half of it. Which half you hate indicates which flavor of Trufan you are.

          2. The Movies. I definately hate the movies.

            I like a good chunk of the video games though.

          3. Not Adahn

            The coin-op vector graphics game was excellent. The multi-mode “Jedi” game was pretty good.

            TIE fighter was better than X-wing, but the latter was still a pretty good game. Not as good as Wing Commander though. .

          4. KotOR was good. The FPS that came out in the 90s was pretty good too, and of course X-Wing vs. Tie Fighter is classic.

          5. Not Adahn

            Dark Forces? Yes, that had a really good feel of being part of the SW universe.

          6. Yeah, Dark Forces was the shit. The level design was great, I thought. The graphics look like dog butt today but the design principles in the game hold up.

        2. l0b0t

          Malcolm Tucker agrees – https://youtu.be/Cg-pnGFbwMQ

    2. DrOtto

      I think SF’s rundown in H&H was the most I’ve read on it. I also think it was the least “enjoyable” H&H I’ve read. But at no point did lunch threaten escape.

    3. mexican sharpshooter

      You don’t want to talk about Vladimir Putin?

    4. Pope Jimbo

      How about NoDak girl’s b-ball? Does that interest you?

      Grand Fork’s Central snaps 49-game losing streak.

      1. Grand Fork’s central what?

        1. MikeS

          And which girl does the b-ball belong to?

        2. Central is capitalized. It’s a proper noun, owned by Grand Fork.

      2. MikeS

        No.

    5. Fourscore

      I read “Senate will quit”…,

      Did a little very slow but jubilant polka around the wood box. Had a senior moment but then reality set in. With the MS constraints on the comments I, along with Jimmy Carter and the country, am in a funk.

  5. DrOtto

    Your mama is so stupid, she went to the dentist for a bluetooth.

  6. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

    Oh, Mexican Sharpshooter, I am disappoint. Not even that girl from that Mexican soccer game.

    *kicks pebble*

    1. mexican sharpshooter

      I am literally buttoning a shirt, getting ready for work…I don’t have time for that.

      1. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

        Have fun at work

      2. pistoffnick
  7. No racial, ethnic, or sexual epithets.

    Dammit. I was going to go with ‘Human’.

  8. robc

    Christmas beer will be rationed!

    http://barclayperkins.blogspot.com/2019/12/christmas-beer-will-be-rationed-this.html

    I like the part about buying bonds with your estate in order to purchase free beer for local elderly annually.

    1. robc

      Also good:

      “It really pissed off the temperance twats that things like sugar and tea were rationed but beer wasn’t. They pulled their usually crap about “destroying food” until Churchill told them to shut up.”

    2. A Leap at the Wheel

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5993lPFEwaE

      Really good series about British rations, featuring Gun Jesus.

      1. Gustave Lytton

        Was hoping it was about the British Army’s 24 Ration Packs, which used to be quite good.

        1. Gustave Lytton

          *24 hour

  9. Pope Jimbo

    Insult:

    Nice job, Tundra-breath.

    1. Tundra

      Minty fresh with undertones of citrus?

      How is that an insult?

      1. Not Adahn

        1. Lutefisk doesn’t actually smell of citrus.

        2. Storing mints in your hockey gloves isn’t really helping.

    2. Fourscore

      Is the “Nice Job” part the sarcasm/insult? Otherwise I don’t get it.

    3. MikeS

      How about: “You remind me of a Minnesodan I know.”

      1. A Leap at the Wheel

        Off, that’s low.

      2. Pope Jimbo

        YOU THROW LIKE A NODAK!

      3. Fourscore

        MikeS, next time* you come by we’ll go to the river and dive for an SKS, see if it still shoots.

        *But not at HH, too crowded.

        Before the accident several deer were taken 1 shot out to 100 yards before the brush got to thick to see through.

        1. MikeS

          Oooh! I would enjoy that very much. I’ll have to take a trip over there this summer. Maybe rent the secret Glib Cabin for a weekend.

          1. Pope Jimbo

            Be careful. Those aren’t chocolates that are on your pillow at the Secret Glib Cabin.

        2. Jarflax

          MikeS, next time* you come by we’ll go to the river and dive for an SKS, see if it still shoots.

          Just one? I thought you needed at least 3?

          Skssksksks

          lol, and I oop!

  10. Rebel Scum

    Indio

    I must not be up to date on my slurs because I have no idea what this is.

    1. Not Adahn

      It what one of those freaks with an incorrectly-trimmed umbilical cord call us normal people.

    2. leon

      It’s the Villan from A Few Dollars More

      1. I should try to write a western sometime.

        1. Drake

          Hang ‘Em High was classic Clint. The Outlaw Josey Wales was a spectacular orgy of violence.

      2. Idle Hands

        I always have a hard time deciding which film I like better between Fist Full of Dollars and a Few Dollars More. I go back in forth.

        1. “A Few Dollars More” since it wasn’t a remake of Yojimbo.

          1. Idle Hands

            Yeah probably, But it is the best rendition of Yojimbo.

          2. A Leap at the Wheel

            “Fist Full of Dollars” because it was a great remake of Yojimbo.

    3. mexican sharpshooter

      Its a slur Mexicans use against Indians.

      1. Not Adahn

        I thought that was cholo?

        1. mexican sharpshooter

          That’s not an insult.

          1. mexican sharpshooter

            *word to the wise—don’t call a cholo a cholo.

          2. My brief time in Escondido taught me that a cholo is someone who drives a dropped Chevy S-10 painted like a Miami Dolphins jersey on 13″ rims with shag carpet on the dashboard, listens to oompah music, and will react poorly to being called a cholo.

          3. JD is Unemployed

            a dropped Chevy S-10 painted like a Miami Dolphins jersey on 13″ rims with shag carpet on the dashboard

            Yes please, minus the shag carpet, and the paint job. I’ve got a soft spot for baby Chevys.

          4. Jarflax

            I always got a chuckle that Robert Parker named Mexican hawk, Chollo.

      2. Tres Cool

        I read that in Andrew Dice Clay’s voice……Indy-OH!

    4. Rhywun

      Indi@

      1. Not Adahn

        Pronounced “in-deeks”

  11. Idle Hands

    2019 was a really good year for movies. Just watched Once Upon of Hollywood last night, just fucking yes. Best movie Tarantino’s made all decade. I’ve seen more good movies this year than I have any year since like 2009 when Iron Man and Dark Knight came out. Dragged Across Concrete, Under the Silver Lake and Ford vs Ferrari were all very good movies. I still haven’t seen Joker yet kind of waiting on that one to go down in price before renting on Amazon.

    1. Idle Hands

      *2008

    2. leon

      Did not like Dark Night. Only saw it once.

      1. You got the chinese knockoff, that’s why.

        1. Idle Hands

          See same both dark both knight. No difference.

          1. Not Adahn

            Yeah, the quality of Chinese counterfeits has gotten really good.

      2. Idle Hands

        That’s fine. YMMV.

      3. CPRM

        I didn’t think The Dark Knight was as good as everyone else thought, but it was a good movie. The Dark Knight Rises was a trash fire.

        1. Idle Hands

          God that movie was a drag.

          1. Not Adahn

            Batman Returns Is best Batman.

          2. The Last American Hero

            Um, Batman: The Movie disagrees.

          3. Not Adahn

            Ok boomer.

    3. Chipwooder

      QT gave me the kind of raw, unfiltered hippie hatred my soul thirsts for. I salute him for that.

      1. Idle Hands

        I can’t decide whether I like it or Jackie Brown better for my #2 seed. Obviously #1 is Pulp Fiction. Just everything about Once Upon a Time was refreshing. The total beatdown of the hippy women in the #metoo era, the fucking huge risk he took story wise with an audience that probably for the most part have never ever even read Helter Skelter or know who Sharon Tate even is, and the fucking awesome set pieces.

        1. Chipwooder

          It reminded me more than a little of The Big Lebowski in that the plot was merely an excuse to tie the scenes together. As with The Big Lebowski, this led to criticism that there wasn’t any plot, or that it didn’t make sense, etc. People can’t seem to just enjoy the incredible scenes on their own, in a sort of a-la-carte fashion. When Cliff goes to Spahn Ranch and feels every hippie layabout there staring at him, then emerges from the house to find them standing around watching him in silence? Genius. In a film that winks at the audience more than a few times, QT plays it straight and delivers a creepy as hell scene that really nails the malevolent weirdness of the Family.

          I wasn’t alive in 1969 but goddamn it made it feel very real and present in a way few historically based films are able to.

          1. Idle Hands

            yep just brilliant. I’m a sucker for meandering slow burning plots with interesting characters and a hint of neo noir. Big Lebowski is an obvious favorite of mine. If you haven’t seen Dragged Across Concrete or Under the Silver Lake you need to. I can’t recommend either enough. I don’t understand how Under the Silver Lake got made, It’s like a less surreal David Lynch movie but far better than any of his fucking drivel.

    4. straffinrun

      I can’t be the only one, can I? Hate all superhero movies. Live in reality, motherfuckers.

      1. straffinrun

        Definitely way too drunk to defend that, but I stand by it.

        1. Not Adahn

          Agreed. In reality, Superman’s X-ray vision wouldn’t have allowed him to tell Lois’ panties were pink, since pink is a visible-wavelength phenomenon, and X-rays result from inner shell electronic transitions.

          1. Tres Cool

            get a load of Madam Curie over here

          2. Not Adahn

            Hedy Lamar > Marie Curie

          3. A Leap at the Wheel

            Do doubt. Noped out of Nazi Germany early in the game. Made scientific advances in the use of invisible energy but without killing anyone.

            Clear winner.

          4. Hedy Lamarr > Greer Garson.

        2. Tundra

          I’ll stand with you. As long as I can still dig Army of Darkness.

        3. Rhywun

          Enh, you’re not alone. I’ve mentioned that the last one I enjoyed was probably Superman II.

          1. straffinrun

            Mine was Darkman.

          2. l0b0t

            Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse is the BEST superhero movie of the 21st century. Peter Porker: The Spectacular Spider Ham – ’nuff said True Believers.

      2. Idle Hands

        I was 18 in 2008 and I didn’t see or understand what it meant for the next decade of movies after Hollywood realized the cash flow potential of running the genre into the ground over and over and over. How naive I was.

      3. invisible finger

        With a couple of exceptions I don’t care to investigate, superhero stories are statist propaganda.

        1. A Leap at the Wheel

          Uhh, I’ve been reading (western) comic books for the last thirty years, and I find them to be more reliably anti-statist than, say, the Libertarian Party or writers at TOS.

          Also, Steve Ditko has a sad.

          1. Just a thought not a sermon

            Exactly–much of the idea of superhero comics is that there are problems the police/authorities can’t handle, so individuals with great abilities must take things into their own hands. I don’t think vigilantism is necessarily a libertarian message, but definitely not statist.

        2. Idle Hands

          You need to watch The Boys on amazon and read the Watchmen. Both make this point pretty saliently.

      4. The first Iron Man and the first Guardians of the Galaxy are very good. Most of the others are now blending into a Marvel melange. Kick-Ass was decent.

    5. robc

      Idea I had a number of years back, that I still like. Oscars should be awarded based on a 25 year lag.

      So, for 2019, we decide the Best Picture of 1994. And, of course, the correct answer is The Shawshank Redemption. With a 25 year lag, I don’t think Forrest Gump gets a vote.

      I had a friend who used to always bitch about Gump winning, he was a big Tarantino fan. I finally shut him up by agreeing with him, that Gump didn’t deserve it, that clearly Shawshank did.

      1. robc

        For 2020 we have Braveheart, Apollo 13, Babe, Il Postino, and Sense and Sensibility (those were the nominees back then, maybe something was missed).

        No sure Braveheart would win today, I would guess Apollo 13 holds up the best.

        1. No need to stick to the nominations made in the target year. They were too close to the event. Any release is eligable.

          1. robc

            I agree, the nominations at the time are a good starting point for consideration.

          2. Seven was released in 1995.

            Wait… Tommy Boy, Bad Boys, Crimson Tide, Die Hard 3, Hackers, Canadian Bacon, Mallrats, Casino, Toy Story, 12 Monkeys… and the list keeps going.

          3. Idle Hands

            Omg Hackers was dated the day it came out. I would have sworn it came out it 88-91. What was it made than and shelved for half a decade?

          4. It was a great comedy.

            I most recently saw it in college. It was made funnier in context aside from the fact this was a technical institution, we were in Gibson Hall at the time.

          5. robc

            So, nothing better than Apollo 13. Got it.

          6. You have strange taste in movies.

            I was just amazed at how many films I have seen and liked came out in that one year.

          7. Desperado, Heat, and then we get into the guilty pleasure category of bad but fun movies.

        2. Idle Hands

          Tom Hanks owned the 90’s I really hate Tom Hanks for reasons I don’t quite understand.

          1. l0b0t

            Bosom Buddies, and Bachelor Party make up for all his modern nonsense.

        3. Nah, Braveheart is still better than Apollo 13.

          1. As is Babe, which is a terrific movie I can’t get my kids to watch.

      2. Rhywun

        That is a great idea.

      3. CPRM

        Most Oscars are already given as *make-ups* to people they snubbed in the past, your plan would just make it even more convoluted.

        1. robc

          For that reason, I don’t think Braveheart wins because of Mel Gibson over the last 25 years.

        2. Oh, no, we don’t care who was “Snubbed”, and we don’t let movie folks vote.

          Their biases don’t reflect what makes a good movie, and produces strange results where a movie about the film industry that isn’t any good to the general audience gets praise because it strikes close to home for the academy.

          1. Jarflax

            I’d take this further and deny the vote to anyone who went to film school. They get so caught up worshiping their ‘superior’ knowledge about techniques and innovation that they miss the entire point. Was the movie good or not?

      4. Just a thought not a sermon

        A college friend of mine pointed out when Forrest Gump came out that that was what Hollywood thinks of the South–everybody’s either evil, or they’re like Gump, kind-hearted but dumb.

        1. Idle Hands

          lol that’s a pretty on point observation.

    6. JD is Unemployed

      The Dark Knight was waaaayyyy too long. I really needed to piss and I kept sitting there thinking “it’ll finish in a minute, I’ll go then,” but 45 minutes later I did a quick dash to the urinals and back and there was still probably at least 30 mins left. I also never really thought about comparing it to Iron Man, but now I think about it Iron Man was 123487x better, and kind of showed just how stale super hero movies has gotten up that point. I get that there were some intense, dark, broody performances etc, in those Nolan Batman films, but the dude does not know how to tell a story without keeping at least an hour of boring, extraneous footage in every movie he’s made. By comparison, Iron Man was most excellent, totally refreshing, and enjoyable.

  12. Drake

    This is as good a theory on the “why” of the impeachment itself as I’ve heard. Basically a fishing license for dirt to be used in the campaign next year.

    While not actually moving the articles of impeachment over to the Senate for an embarrassing trial.

    1. Idle Hands

      Meh maybe all that’s all fine and good but it still doesn’t explain why they would take this course when the most interesting and salacious bit of the story is about Joe Bidens crackhead stripper impregnating son was making millions of dollars sitting on the corporate board. Feels self defeating as your knee capping your presidential candidate in the process as well. I feel like this is more a hail mary sop to the base to try to hold onto the house and to try to flip the senate to blue, They are going to try to bludgeon the acquit senators saying they are corrupt like the president. I don’t think it’s going to work, but what else can you do when everyone gets what Trump is already that was baked in 2016 and the Economy is going like gang busters right now.

      1. Drake

        They realized that the Biden corruption story was going to come out either way after the old moron bragged about it in public. By accusing Trump of doing what Biden really had done, they muddied the waters.

        1. Idle Hands

          This brings it front in center, I just don’t see the benefit. If you impeach Trump over it you can’t than run Biden as your candidate because not only does Biden admit on tape to doing exactly what they are accusing trump was thinking while he did what he was doing. Biden had a clear reason to benefit finacially directly and politically. If they had just stuck to Russia and done a bullshit impeachment there they could just waive off the Biden stuff that Trump was stacking the deck against Biden and persecuting him.

          1. Idle Hands

            I also don’t think they ever saw Trump getting in front of this scandal by just dumping the Transcript into the open right away. They were hoping to gaslight everybody about this phone call for months and having him dump it so early totaly crippled them in a way they weren’t expecting that early.

          2. invisible finger

            They don’t want Biden running. They want Hilary.

          3. Idle Hands

            yes like Freddy Krueger, Jason Vorheeves or Michael Meyers before her no matter how bad the last movie was or how it ended I never ever doubt the possibility of a sequel.

    2. Suthenboy

      IANAL but cant the senate file for a mandamus and force them to send it? I fully expected them to not want it to go to trial but I figured once they had the vote they would be fucked.

      1. Not Adahn

        And then impeach Pelosi for Obstruction of the Senate.

        1. Now THAT would be interesting.

          1. Jarflax

            The house is self governing. The senate cannot remove house members.

    3. McConnell should schedule a trial, and if Schiff & Co. don’t show up, vote to acquit.

    4. JaimeRoberto Delecto

      That’s certainly what the demands for his tax returns are about.

  13. The Late P Brooks

    Phew! I was concerned.

    1. mexican sharpshooter

      Did your test for Hep C come back negative?

      1. Jarflax

        Do you want the Alladeen news or the Alladeen news? You are HIV Alladeen.

        Ok, ok, I’m allowed a guilty pleasure or two as well.

  14. Rebel Scum

    Speaking of violating Constitutional norms…

    Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) appears to be considering an idea Democrats have floated for several days of holding back the articles of impeachment to exercise leverage over the Senate and the president.

    She declined formally to transmit the articles to the Senate on Wednesday evening after the House voted to impeach President Donald Trump.

    Unfortunately for them, the Senate can act, regardless — and would vote to acquit.

    That’s because the Constitution is absolutely clear about the Senate’s authority. Article I, Section 3 says: “The Senate shall have the sole Power to try all Impeachments.”

    1. leon

      Unfortunately for them, the Senate can act, regardless — and would vote to acquit.

      That’s because the Constitution is absolutely clear about the Senate’s authority. Article I, Section 3 says: “The Senate shall have the sole Power to try all Impeachments.”

      While i’m inclined to get a second legal opinion about this, i did wonder how feasible this is. It’s not like the senate doesn’t know what happened, nor what the Articles of impeachment were.

      Would the Senate sue the House or vice versa?

      1. Social Justice is Neither

        If the house can claim obstruction for not being allowed to question witnesses they never called why can’t the Senate vote on a passed bill they haven’t been formally given.

    2. The answer is simple. Just hold unofficial hearings, both private and public. Control and sculpt the info coming out of those meetings to make it increasingly untenable for the house to continue withholding the impeachment articles.

      Basically, just copy what happened in the house

      1. Basically, just copy what happened in the house

        I was thinking as I was reading that that it sounded very familiar…

  15. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

    Did you know December 16th was the anniversary of the Boston Tea Party? Today, it is taught as the “Racist Cultural Appropriation of Hate Party”, but to those who are still sane, here is an interesting write-up on it.

    https://libertarianinstitute.org/articles/today-in-history-the-boston-tea-party/

    FTA:

    “After congregating at the Old South Meeting House, a group of patriots donned the attire of Native Mohawk Indians – to show that their action was reflective of an American cause rather than a British one. They rushed down to the harbor, where they boarded the tea ship Dartmouth and unloaded all 342 chests of tea into the water. Although they engaged in a particularly rebellious act, the Sons of Liberty made sure to avoid the destruction of private property. Nothing was stolen or looted from the ship, and the decks were even swept clean.

    Those who participated in the tea’s destruction were sworn to secrecy, and those who participated are still subject to historical debate. Although the complicity of Samuel Adams is still disputed, he unquestionably embarked upon an immediate campaign to publicize the event. Adams and the Massachusetts Whigs declared that taxes could not levied without the endorsement of the people’s representatives – a notion that stretched all the way back to 1215 and the Magna Carta.

    Contrary to popular belief, the destruction of the tea was not specifically a tax protest – the patriots did object to taxes levied without representation, but the 1773 Tea Act had actually lowered the taxes on tea. Instead, the colonists disavowed mercantile practices of the British government, specifically the tea monopoly that was granted to the East India Tea Company through the law. Additionally, they renounced the idea that Parliamentary law was supreme over all of the British Empire and could override the will of the colonial assemblies.”

    1. and the decks were even swept clean.

      So both the old and new Tea Parties leave the protest sites cleaner than they find them? Interesting parallel.

      1. Bob Boberson

        No, you need to leave your broken down tents, filthy bedding and feces around to stick it to those corporate fat cats who hate Gaia.

        /Left-wing protestor

        1. ChipsnSalsa

          Don’t forget a couple of corpses to.

    2. CPRM

      the 1773 Tea Act had actually lowered the taxes on tea. Instead, the colonists disavowed mercantile practices of the British government, specifically the tea monopoly that was granted to the East India Tea Company through the law.

      THIS. I wrote about it long ago when blogging was still a thing.

      1. Some of us still blog.

    3. l0b0t

      Although they engaged in a particularly rebellious act, the Sons of Liberty made sure to avoid the destruction of private property. Nothing was stolen or looted from the ship, and the decks were even swept clean.

      Well, apart from the entire cargo of tea that they stole and looted. Also, wasn’t this more about the ongoing feud between the Adams (smugglers) and the Hutchinsons (magistrates/tax collectors?)

      1. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

        I may be wrong on this, which is often the case, but wasn’t Hancock the smuggler and Adams was just the “rebel without a cause and a large inheritance left to him from his father” (I’m talking about Sam, not John who was almost the polar opposite)?

      2. A Leap at the Wheel

        Destroyed isn’t looted.

        Adams was likely only a smuggler because it was impossible for him to be legit. Hard to know for sure, since he was a hot head who might have gone “All Taxation Is Theft” but I personally don’t think so.

        1. invisible finger

          Exactly. Only a statist considers “smuggler” a necessary word.

          1. A Leap at the Wheel

            Bruh doe you even Anarchocapitolism?

    4. Suthenboy

      By all means Fauxcahontas, disassemble the electoral college. I mean, what could go wrong?

    5. Chafed

      Where’s the part about Sam Adams starting a brewery?

    6. pan fried wylie

      Did you know December 16th was the anniversary of the Boston Tea Party?

      I did not. I DID coincidentally buy a “Boston Tea Party” tea sampler two weeks ago. Amazon suggested it via the previous sampler I got though, so I don’t think it was anniversary related…

      1. Did you get empty boxes smelling faintly of seawater and sewage?

  16. The Late P Brooks

    “Leave me alone. I already have a mother.”

    1. Chafed

      Well done.

  17. Tundra

    His Holiness, Leap and I got to add another victim to our MNGlibs group (even if he is technically a Sconnie).

    Turns out, PudPaisley, beyond having almost excellent taste in music, is a super cool guy. Thanks, Pud.

    1. Pope Jimbo

      I was a bit worried there this morning that PP was an undercover G-man and he used us to get enough info to break into Glibs HQ. That being why the links were gone this morning.

      Nice to find out that he really was the nice guy he seemed to be.

      1. Tundra

        No G-man would show up in a Steve Smith Christmas sweater.

        1. pan fried wylie

          The one with STEVE SMITH on it, or the one MADE OF SS?

          1. Jarflax

            The G-men have been called the American SS before.

    2. straffinrun

      You may get me next year (early summer?) next year. Figure I’ll just walk off the plane and throw my gloves to the ice and see who gets in my face.

      1. How dare you disrespect your handwear like that?!

        1. straffinrun

          My whole life is based on disrespecting handwear.

          1. Not Adahn

            Yes, but in the U.S., you can’t easily replace your gloves at a nearby vending machine.

          2. pan fried wylie

            “Fingerblaster Gloves” doesn’t mean what you thought.

      2. Pope Jimbo

        Leap and I were early and were sitting at a table when a disreputable dude walks in and starts looking around in a clueless manner. That is when we whispered* “Glibs” and PP decoyed right in. So your plan to drop the gloves would probably work great.

        *yes, whispered, despite being a dive bar that is a good way to get your ass kicked by the normies

        1. A Leap at the Wheel

          You don’t think the bikers at the bar would have been intimidated by your lavender button down shirt?

          1. Pope Jimbo

            It was violet!

        2. The Last American Hero

          Like the top hats and monocles didn’t tip him off.

      3. Tundra

        Well, it wouldn’t be my first scrap at baggage claim…

      4. Sensei

        I still chuckle over what you wrote when your wife experienced a Minnesota for the first time.

        I’m assuming she said “uso” and I think you translated it as “no way” or something similar at the time.

        1. straffinrun

          I intentionally misinterpreted it as “I wanna …..” *Saving our family friendly rating.

  18. The Late P Brooks

    I always have a hard time deciding which film I like better between Fist Full of Dollars and a Few Dollars More. I go back in forth.

    Based on nothing but the “My mule wants you to apologize to him” part, I’m going with Fistful.

    1. Pope Jimbo

      Fistful. Definitely.

      1. Sensei

        +1

    2. leon

      That was a great part, but not enough for me to think it was better than Few Dollars More. I felt the story was more fleshed out, and Van Cleese’s character was better than either of the supporting characters in a Few Dollars More.

      1. Idle Hands

        Van Cleef is probably the best Cowboy ever. He does menacing so well, but he could be a bad guy or he good be totally evil he sells both so well.

        1. l0b0t

          Indeed. That’s why I love the Sabata series.

    3. Tundra

      This is America, FFS.

      I love them both.

      1. A Leap at the Wheel

        And yet, we as a country allow the Italians to overtake up in Western Nostalgia (that’s where all the replica cowboy guns are made, and you know, Sergio Leone) and Japan to overtake us in Denim Nostalgia.

        SMDH.

        1. What the fuck is “Denim Nostalgia”?

          1. A Leap at the Wheel

            Blue Jeans were quintessential American work-wear and wormed their way into Americana. Then the big US denim manufacturers all liquidated their looms and started selling shitty denim. The Japanese market fell in love with Americana at the same time and purchased all the looms, and now they make more Americana denim than the US does, and people into Americana or who have nostalgia for the glory days of US denim production buy from the Japanese manufacturers.

            So, like cosplay.

  19. The Late P Brooks

    Krugabe wrote a book. This poor dummy reviewed it.

    In the Obama years, technocrats determined that the Federal Reserve’s bond-buying in a depressed economy wouldn’t generate dangerous inflation, but “the official Republican view,” Krugman tells us, was that the Fed was being irresponsible. In the Trump presidency, technocrats have pointed out the lack of support for the claim that tax cuts for high earners will generate prosperity, but Republicans have preached this gospel regardless. Commentators in this post-evidence, post-truth environment find themselves “arguing with zombies,” to cite Krugman’s book title. They confront “ideas that should have been killed by contrary evidence, but instead keep shambling along, eating people’s brains.”

    Faced with these alarming undead adversaries, Krugman has concluded that politically neutral truth telling is not merely impossible. It is morally inadequate. He duly sets out four rules for engaged public intellectuals. First, they should “stay with the easy stuff,” meaning subjects on which experts have achieved consensus: This is where an authoritative commentator can improve public understanding by delivering a clear message. Second, they should communicate in plain English—no controversy there. Third, and a bit more edgily, Krugman insists that commentators should “be honest about dishonesty.” If politicians deny clear evidence, they should be called out for arguing in bad faith. Finally, Krugman proclaims a rule that flies in the face of traditional journalistic tradecraft: “Don’t be afraid to talk about motives.”

    To see what Krugman means in practice, let’s apply his rules to the topic that best suits his approach. As he rightly maintains, Republican leaders have repeatedly ignored the solid expert consensus on climate change. Given that this consensus has been clear for more than a decade, it is fair to conclude that Republican leaders are consciously making false statements—in other words, that they are liars. Guessing at their motives seems risky but not totally unreasonable. Conceivably, they might be lying because they don’t want to irk voters with the news that hamburgers and pickup trucks are cooking the planet. But Krugman is basically right that “almost all prominent climate deniers are on the fossil-fuel take.” To state the matter plainly, conservatives lie about this issue because they are paid to lie. Or, in Krugman’s broad and snarling formulation: “Republicans don’t just have bad ideas; at this point, they are, necessarily, bad people.”

    ——-

    In short, Krugman is suffering from an especially public case of what’s come to be known as Trump Derangement Syndrome. Appalled by the Republican Party’s most bigoted leaders, whose rise he traces at least as far back as the George W. Bush administration, he has allowed himself to believe that nearly all Republicans are corrupt and evil, and therefore that reasoned argument is futile. “The modern G.O.P. doesn’t do policy analysis,” he pronounces. Yet the reality is subtler. Republicans are more open to reason than Krugman allows.

    The world as seen through the eyes of a shit flinging howler monkey. It’s a dark and fearsome place.

    1. leon

      The title is clearly a dig at Bob Murphy, who wrote “Contra Krugman”.

      /Ok probably not but still…

    2. Bob Boberson

      Wow, he literally stole Tom Woods and Bob Murphy’s bit for the title of his book

  20. bacon-magic

    You are the sock that young boys hide under the bed after looking at hentai.

  21. Drake

    The Senate snuck a path to citizenship for Liberians into the spending bill. I thought Liberia was founded by freed slaves and its Constitution was a near copy of the U.S. Constitution, why would they want to leave?

    1. JaimeRoberto Delecto

      Because it’s a shit hole.

  22. Pope Jimbo

    Winona LaDuke. Eco MLK.

    I believe in just laws. And most of all, I believe in the laws of Mother Earth. I’m going to uphold those laws. I consider myself very patriotic. I’m a patriot to this land.

    1. Pope Jimbo

      Also she is totes 100% truthful.

      “The Last Polar Bear” is the name of a book written by Tim Foresman. I met Foresman just before his arrest in Washington last week. Foresman was the senior climate scientist for the United Nations Intergovernmental Report on Climate Change. That’s where the United Nations told us that we had less than a decade to cut our carbon emissions.

      Foresman stood prominently at the gathering where Fields, myself, Fonda, young people, and union representatives—including bus drivers and teachers—came to demand action from elected officials on climate change. Foresman kept his eye on me. When I walked off the platform, he came with his book, “The Last Polar Bear.” That’s exactly what it’s about. We’ve got all sorts of touching children’s books about furry animal friends. Well, these ones are dying. The polar bears are committing cannibalism, killing each other and starving to death. It’s all because of changing sea ice, a die-off of their food, and, of course, the PCBs and other fossil fuel byproducts we’ve sent directly to them through wind currents.

      The 2018 State of the Polar Bear report called and would like a word.

      1. Bob Boberson

        Huh, maybe they are eating each other because they are overpopulated due to arbitrary hunting restrictions ….gee, I wonder.

        1. Pope Jimbo

          What are you talking about Double B?

          Everyone knows that polar bears ride around on the ice playing together and drinking cokes.

          Once in a while a young polar bear will befriend an orphaned seal and they will gad about the arctic having great adventures.

          1. Jarflax

            Do the adventures involve seal entrails followed by polar bear naps?

          2. When the bears get tired of playing with their food, yes.

    2. leon

      I’m still pulling for Marianne Williamson to get the nomination.

      1. Bob Boberson

        At this point I’m a Biden man, I want more utterly incoherent stories and bleeding eyes.

        1. Rebel Scum

          But Mystic Marianne is hawt.

          1. Yeah, after watching the latest season of The Expanse I’m all in on GILF-y brunette presidents.

          2. Rhywun

            NO SPOILERS

          3. Not Adahn

            I thought Mary McDowell was in BSG, not The Expanse.

    3. straffinrun

      Indeed, as climate change begins to transform our world, billions feel the devastation of drought, floods, hurricanes and forest fires. The world is on fire.

      Please define “feel”, would ya?

        1. straffinrun

          Clicked that and let it run. They are more than just the Milky Way song I knew. Putting me to sleep, though.

          1. Tundra

            The whole album is terrific. Very chill, though.

  23. Tundra

    Winnipeg Police Hunt Black Market Gun Maker\

    Ah, the sweet, sweet smell of prohibition failure.

    Gets me every time.

    1. Pope Jimbo

      RACISTS!

      I’m assuming they are looking for a black guy who sells guns in the local market?

  24. Chipwooder

    Seen at Instapundit: McMuffin takes a direct hit

    Douglas Patch
    @DouglasPatch
    Will Evan ever pay his vendors?
    Quote Tweet

    Evan McMullin
    @EvanMcMullin
    · 18h
    Will not a single House Republican rise in defense of the Constitution and the rule of law?
    2:50 PM · Dec 18, 2019

    1. Not Adahn

      Dammit, now I want a McMuffin, but don’t want to lose my parking place at work.

      1. Tundra

        Send an intern. That’s what they are there for.

        1. A Leap at the Wheel

          Make sure they wear blaze orange or a reflective vest. Its dark this time of year, and if you leave an intern in your parking spot to save it when you run to McD’s, you don’t want someone driving over them.

          Safety first.

  25. Rebel Scum

    Celebs are still politically retarded.

    Michael Moore✔
    @MMFlint

    I GOT IN! I AM SEATED IN THE HOUSE GALLERY FRONT ROW WITNESSING HISTORY. CONGRESS IS ABOUT TO IMPEACH A LAWLESS, CRIMINAL PRESIDENT. I had to give my phone up, but will be back tonight and on the podcast to share what I witnessed.

    Then who tweeted this twat?

    Alyssa Milano✔
    @Alyssa_Milano

    I expected this moment but I expected to be more joyful. Maybe jump up & do a happy dance. Maybe.

    But I’m just sad and heartbroken. What he’s left behind can’t be erased with this vote.

    The bigotry and xenophobia he’s emboldened. The lies.

    It will take generations to recover.

    *rolls eyes*

    Rob Reiner✔
    @robreiner

    There are not alternative facts. There are only facts. The sky is blue. The world is round. Water is wet. And the most Criminally Corrupt President in our Nation’s history has committed High Crimes & Misdemeanors & will be Impeached by The United States House Of Representatives.

    Yeah, sure.

    1. Drake

      Shut up Meathead.

    2. Social Justice is Neither

      So corrupt they found exactly nothing of substance and what is in plain view is no worse than prior presidents.

    3. WTF

      It doesn’t seem to bother these dolts that the House has failed to present actual evidence of high crimes and misdemeanors, which is why they used vague made-up things like abuse of power and obstruction of congress, which have no statutory standing or definition.

  26. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

    Comfortably Smug

    @ComfortablySmug

    “I think what I like more than anything with Amash is how he’s wanting to impeach the president over *checks notes* not giving the foreign aid that Amash votes against.”

    1. straffinrun

      She’s twisting his words to make him look like a hypocrite when he’s just being an asshole.

    2. Bob Boberson

      What do you think Amash’s angle is with his Never Trump schtick?

      Frankly it’s kinda baffling to me, even from a utilitarian perspective.

      1. I think Chipwooder has it. I think he’s dazzled by the press he’s getting and he loves hearing that he’s some sort of maverick politician daring to speak truth to power or whatever. Unfortunately for him, I suspect it’s not a growth sector and I’m not seeing a big speaking circuit role for him.

        1. A Leap at the Wheel

          Like I said yesterday – I bet he gives a *great* concession speech.

    3. Chipwooder

      Amash has really fallen in love with the fawning press coverage he now receives. He should be smart enough to realize that it will flip on him when he’s no longer useful to them, but then some people just like seeing their name in lights.

      1. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

        What he should be worried about is that I found this, because it was retweeted by a few libertarian accounts that I read once in a while.

    4. Idle Hands

      Comfortably Smug is like the only reason I would ever consider getting account. That guy is fucking hilarious. I hate that I love that parody account so much.

    5. Suthenboy

      Wait, I thought he did give the foreign aid and no investigation into the Bidens bribe money was launched? Right? He is being impeached over something he never did.

      *One of my favorite lines: “Once again I am the last one to find out about what I did”
      Trump should borrow that one.

      1. JaimeRoberto Delecto

        That describes most of the “obstruction” stuff in the Mueller report. It was all stuff like, “he wanted to fire Mueller, but never did”.

        1. I wanted to give every communist in the counrty a helicopter ride, but so far have not.

          1. Jarflax

            Yeah, I can’t fly a helicopter either.

  27. Just a thought not a sermon

    121) I’ve seen this in a few places the last week: Oceans contain a million times more plastic than previously thought.

    A million times more plastic? How is that possible? Have the Chinese been manufacturing plastics on a massive scale for the express purpose of dumping in the world’s oceans?

    No, not at all. Actually what the study found was that there are lots more micro-bits of plastic than previously believed, not that the actual volume is a million times more. But even then, why would there be so much more microplastic?

    What none of the articles I’ve seen has addressed, but the only thing that makes any sense, is that it’s because larger plastics are breaking down in the ocean. In other words, it’s a good thing! Natural processes are at work, turning our garbage into smaller, less damaging bits—and eventually into harmless microscopic particles.

    1. Not Adahn

      No-no, smaller pieces are worse, because they can slip into your DNA and mutate your kids.

    2. leon

      Have the Chinese been manufacturing plastics on a massive scale for the express purpose of dumping in the world’s oceans?

      Gotta do something to pump those GDP numbers up

    3. The actual headline is correct, though. It’s not that the total volume of plastic is greater, it’s that the amount of it that’s considered “microplastic” is much higher. As for the impact, the jury’s still out. On one side, there’s concern that microplastics are carcinogenic, or they could interfere with biological processes. On the other, there’s some skepticism that they have any special impact beyond what you see with all the other teeny tiny bits of crap that your circulatory system filters out. As usual, it’s being heavily politicized by people who want to expand state authority, Luddites, and anti-capitalists.

  28. Tundra

    More interesting gun news:

    Second Amendment Sanctuary Movement Spreads To Kentucky

    Keep grabbing, grabbers.

    1. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

      “Remember, this movement actually began in Illinois in 2018 before spreading west to Washington State, Oregon, Colorado, and New Mexico.”

      It really didn’t get a lot of local attention, but I was always curious why new gun control measures were not being put forward at the state level. I imagine that every country south of Joliet probably declared themselves a Second Amendment Sanctuary.

      1. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

        *county

    2. Rebel Scum

      Related

      Another wave of support for the right to keep and bear arms swept across the state of Virginia on Tuesday, with five more counties and one town adopting Second Amendment Sanctuary resolutions in the hopes of sending a message to lawmakers in Richmond, and sending the number of 2A Sanctuary communities in the state into the triple digits.

      1. Tundra

        Excellent. I liked this:

        I was in Prince Edward County for their Second Amendment Sanctuary vote, which passed 5-3 in front of an alternately raucous and respectful crowd of around 600. Supervisors devoted a special meeting specifically to discuss the resolution, so there was no other business on the agenda. County supervisors limited testimony to residents of the county, and alternated hearing supporters and opponents of the resolution. Since there were only seven individuals in the crowd who wanted to speak out against the resolution, that meant only seven pro-resolution voices were heard.

        You don’t see that kind of fairness in ProgLand.

  29. Sensei

    I’m not arguing this isn’t newsworthy, but why is the geography lesson so important in the headline?

    Pennsylvania man accused of vandalizing Beverly Hills synagogue arrested in Hawaii

    1. leon

      What do you call a person from Pennsylvania? Pencils? Vain?

      Wait. sylvainia? like Transylvania….

      All of the sudden i realize why Pie won’t come visit. There is a rival Clan of Vampires here.

      1. robc

        He could go to Lexington, KY. I am sure SF would meet him down at Transylvania U.

        1. Jarflax

          Transylvania is a very blue blood old Lexington money (which is very old money indeed) private school. Picturing SF there makes me smile.

      2. A Leap at the Wheel

        Statistically, I would go with “Meth addict”

        1. Caput Lupinum

          No, we cook meth, we’re addicted to heroin. At least around Scranton, any ways.

      3. Jarflax

        Quaker.

    2. JaimeRoberto Delecto

      Good thing they caught him before he ended up somewhere in Asia.

  30. The Late P Brooks

    Failure

    How should we tell the story of the digital century, now two decades old? We could focus, as journalists tend to do, on the depredations of the connected life. As Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube have devoured the online world, they have undermined traditional media, empowered propagandists, and widened America’s political divides. The smartphone, for all its wonder and utility, has also proved to be a narcotizing agent.

    But what if, instead of focusing on Big Tech’s sins of commission, we paid equal attention to its sins of omission—the failures, the busts, the promises unfulfilled? The past year has offered several lurid examples. WeWork, the office-sharing company that claimed it would reinvent the workplace, imploded on the brink of a public offering. Uber, once seen as an unstoppable force that would transform urban transit as radically as the subway had, has likewise seen its public valuation plummet. From January to October, the two firms together lost $10 billion.

    While these companies might seem like outliers, their struggles hold a message, not just for investors but for all of us. Big Tech continues to find new and profitable ways to sell ads and cloud space, but it has failed, often spectacularly, to remake the world of flesh and steel.

    ——-

    the digital age has coincided with a slump in America’s economic dynamism. The tech sector’s innovations have made a handful of people quite rich, but it has failed to create enough middle-class jobs to offset the decline of the country’s manufacturing base, or to help solve the country’s most pressing problems: deteriorating infrastructure, climate change, low growth, rising economic inequality. Tech companies that operate in the physical world, such as Lyft and DoorDash, offer greater convenience, but they hardly represent the kind of transformation that Reagan and Gore had in mind. These failures—perhaps more than the toxicity of the web—underlie the meanness and radicalism of our era.

    Decades from now, historians will likely look back on the beginning of the 21st century as a period when the smartest minds in the world’s richest country sank their talent, time, and capital into a narrow band of human endeavor—digital technology. Their efforts have given us frictionless access to media, information, consumer goods, and chauffeurs. But software has hardly remade the physical world. We were promised an industrial revolution. What we got was a revolution in consumer convenience.

    The digital revolution- all promise, no deliver.

    Where’s my flying car? Where’s my city in the clouds?

    1. Rhywun

      We could focus, as journalists tend to do, on the depredations

      No kidding.

    2. Where’s my flying car?

      On its way to Mars

      Where’s my city in the clouds?

      In Google’s server farm.

  31. Pope Jimbo

    I think someone is feeling some heat in their current job as a poli-sci professor. At least based on his screed agains STEM education.

    It also really bugs him that Trump is trying to get more of the poors to go into STEM fields to escape poverty.

    Juxtaposing Trump’s glibly anti-science ideology with the administration’s STEM report should finally put to rest any notion that STEM has anything to do with either the critical role of science in addressing society’s most pressing problems or any realistic assessment of the labor market. Rather, the focus on STEM is primarily about creating a certain kind of labor market that benefits particular types of employers and also shifting the entire debate about wage stagnation and declining economic opportunity away from business and public policy and back on students and the educational system. Can’t pay your student loans? Still in your parents’ house? You shouldn’t have majored in [insert non-STEM field here]. Should have majored in STEM!

    1. kinnath

      You shouldn’t have majored in [insert non-STEM field here]. Should have majored in STEM!

      Damn right!

      1. Tundra

        Nice own-goal, there.

    2. leon

      It’s not the children’s fault there is no demand for the career they paid hundreds of thousands of dollars to get credentials for.

    3. creech

      “Trump’s glibly anti-science ideology”
      That must explain why Trump wants a Space Force.

    4. pan fried wylie

      primarily about creating a certain kind of labor market that benefits particular types of employers

      The type with open positions?

  32. The Late P Brooks

    The original Industrial Revolution freed humanity from the centuries-long prison of slow economic growth. In the early 19th century, productivity and income were skyrocketing, first in England and soon throughout Europe. While the transition was brutal for many, the gains were broadly shared: Real wages for the working class doubled in the first half of the century, and life expectancy at birth rose dramatically in the second half.

    In the computer age, the economy has trended in the opposite direction. If American productivity had continued to grow as it did from Harry Truman’s election to Richard Nixon’s resignation, the 201The original Industrial Revolution freed humanity from the centuries-long prison of slow economic growth. In the early 19th century, productivity and income were skyrocketing, first in England and soon throughout Europe. While the transition was brutal for many, the gains were broadly shared: Real wages for the working class doubled in the first half of the century, and life expectancy at birth rose dramatically in the second half.

    In the computer age, the economy has trended in the opposite direction. If American productivity had continued to grow as it did from Harry Truman’s election to Richard Nixon’s resignation, the 2013 economy would have been about 60 percent larger. (Dividing those gains equally would have given the typical middle-class household a bonus of roughly $30,000 a year.) Instead, income growth from 1973 to 2013 was 80 percent slower.3 economy would have been about 60 percent larger. (Dividing those gains equally would have given the typical middle-class household a bonus of roughly $30,000 a year.) Instead, income growth from 1973 to 2013 was 80 percent slower.

    Yes, and if pigs had wings, they’d be eagles.

    1. Not Adahn

      Mmmm…. Eagle bacon.

  33. Sensei

    I’m honestly not sure how I feel about this – is three years the right amount of time, too little, too much?

    Knowingly puts people at risk although not extremely and also causes quite a bit of inconvenience and expense.

    American Airlines mechanic pleads guilty to sabotaging plane in Miami: reports

    1. Drake

      I don’t know enough about avionics to decide if this was a couple hundred counts of attempted murder.

      1. kinnath

        Following the link in this article to the earlier story: https://nypost.com/2019/09/06/american-airlines-mechanic-accused-of-sabotaging-flight/

        Alani was accused of gluing foam inside a tube leading from outside the plane to its air data module, . . .

        Depending upon the system architecture, the aircraft will have at least left and right air data modules and a standby instrument. He screwed with one of them.

        The pilots of Flight 2834 aborted their takeoff on July 17 when the tampering sparked an error alert as they powered up the plane’s engines

        Poorly written, but I assume the crew detected the problem during the pre-flight check list during engine power up because the affected air data module reported that it wasn’t working to the onboard maintenance system.

        Alani added that he only tampered with the ADM “to cause a delay or have the flight canceled in anticipation of obtaining overtime work,” the affidavit said.

        I also assume that Alani knew the tampered ADM would report its failure and he could spend a bunch of time troubleshooting the issue.

        1. tarran

          According to PPRUNE, the plane never made it off the taxiway, so yes, it was caught while taxiing and they aborted well before they would have lined up on the runway for takeoff.

    2. Rhywun

      he was upset about how union contract negotiations with the airline had stalled

      More union scum.

      Also, he couldn’t learn English after 30 years?

      I’m not even going to address the ISIS bit.

    3. Based solely on my fear of flying, I’d give him the chair.

      1. “I didn’t want to, but I thought I owed it to him.”

  34. Mornin’, Glibbies.

    I set myself a bunch of onerous tasks for today that involve driving my pickup truck to faraway places and lifting heavy things. Thus, I must clear my truck of its snow burden, which will be difficult because I am short and my truck is not. Now, whether it’ll start is another thing (it has a hard time if it’s been sitting). Lastly, it is cold and the heater doesn’t work. Are 2 good Hon file cabinets at opposite corners of the metro, priced at $15 each, worth it?

    *looks at the used office furniture outlet, $40 each*

    I suppose.

    1. Do you have an air pump? You could drop the tailgate, let the air out of the back tires and push the snow out with a broom, then reinflate the tires.

      If you don’t have an electric pump, don’t do it this way.

      1. I don’t care about the snow in the bed. It’s on my windshield that’s the problem.

        I have an air compressor and a ladder. The ladder is far less work.

        1. I see, you’d like to see to drive.

          1. I do find it somewhat helpful.

    2. It is always nice to be able to teach someone in the ways of internet horsetrading. I am off to do my onerous tasks.

  35. Sean

    Give me your best insult

    You’re like the Dane Cook of Glibs.

    1. l0b0t

      DAMN!!! Sean comes in off the top rope swinging a folding chair.

    2. Ozymandias

      That is savage.

    3. mexican sharpshooter

      …whoa. I’m not even mad.

    4. Well shit, I may as well not even bother.

  36. Rebel Scum

    ABC News✔
    @ABC

    Democratic Rep. Earl Blumenauer says Pelosi should withhold transferring impeachment articles to Senate: “I hope the House retains control of the articles until the Speaker and Leader Schumer can negotiate agreement on process and witnesses from McConnell” https://abcn.ws/2S7uOSi

    That’s not how it works.

    1. robc

      I assume they don’t want certain witnesses called.

      1. leon

        Clearly because they support getting at the truth. That is why the refused witnesses from the minority party in the House.

      2. Raston Bot

        they want a whole new batch of witnesses. they’re treating it like a fishing expedition so they can drag it out and have dirt for the election cycle. McConnell said he’s going to limit the trial to the two articles and no new witnesses.

    2. leon

      we’ll see what happens. This idea is just a few days old and was born of the desperation of realizing that “Oh yeah, when we throw this over the wall, we have no control over it anymore”.

    3. Pope Jimbo

      It can be if you really, really, really don’t want to deal with the impeachment circus anymore.

      This will be the best way for them to just end the silliness. They can pretend that they did impeach him, but those dastardly Republicans won’t have a fair trial in the Senate so they were forced to just sit on their charges.

      1. robc

        I am wonder, is he impeached if they don’t pass on the charges? At what point does he officially become impeached.

        1. l0b0t

          According to my DerpBook feed, he IS impeached and that’s good enough because he will, always and forever, be known as an impeached president and that will haunt him for the remainder of his life. Then I got dog-piled with stupidity and rage for asking if they felt the same way about Clinton.

          1. Rhywun

            Tell them to move on.

        2. nw

          I’ve been thinking about this.

          The constitution says the house has the sole power of impeachment, and
          the senate has the sole power to try them. There’s nothing about
          “sending” the impeachment to the senate.

          Either the president has been impeached, at which point there is
          simply nothing left for the house to do, and the senate can take it
          up as it wants, or the president has not actually been impeached yet
          because the house rules require some further step. The senate
          gets to try him once he’s impeached. The house simply has no power
          to impeach but prevent a trial.

      2. leon

        That could be the angle, but i don’t believe it is.

        On a side note, it is sometimes fun to take a step back and see the political maneuvering that is happening. You saw the battlefield prep for this last week as they began to talk about how the Senate was planning to not take the trial seriously. Which was funny to me that the senate never said “we will take this as seriously as the house and give the minority party every benefit that was afforded to the minority in the house”

        1. Drake

          Us rubes are all supposed to believe these are august legal proceedings when in fact, they are just marketing meetings.

      3. The Other Kevin

        This keeps the narrative going. Trump is evil and corrupt, we all know it. But those evil Rethuglicans are also corrupt and preventing justice. So keep screeching and #resisting dems, you are fighting the good fight.

    4. Gustave Lytton

      Blumenauer is a certified idiot.

  37. Certified Public Asshat

    Merry Christmas, Here’s How Congress Is about to Waste Your Money

    This package includes $25 million for the “operation, maintenance, and security” of the Kennedy Center in Washington, D.C.

    It includes a $7.25 million increase in funding for the National Endowment for the Arts, the largest increase in a decade.

    These spending increases might be nice to have, but we are $23 trillion in debt. We need to make some tough choices.

    It includes more than $1 billion in new foreign-aid funding without any discussion about what we’re getting for this funding.

    It repeals three Obamacare taxes, with a cost of approximately $400 billion over ten years — the medical-device tax, the sales tax on health insurance, and the Cadillac tax. While I’m all for cutting these taxes, there’s never even been a discussion about whether we should also repeal the spending that these taxes were supposed to pay for. That’s Washington in a nutshell.

    We need more gridlock.

    1. It includes more than $1 billion in new foreign-aid funding without any discussion about what we’re getting for this funding.

      That kind of talk will get you impeached.

    2. Rhywun

      If Congress can’t pass a budget and appropriations bills in a timely and orderly fashion, members of Congress shouldn’t get a paycheck.

      Maybe useful, but only if you add a clause that requires them to read all 2,313 pages.

      1. Out loud, in the chamber, each time it’s amended.

        1. pan fried wylie

          With a per-page-read bonus.

          Unfortended Consequence: so much lingual padding is introduced no bill can ever be completely read before vacation time, ensuring permanent gridlock.

      1. If she’s smart, she’ll take her fuck-you money and go live her life giving no shits.

        1. She’s not smart. Not by her past behaviour in dealing with the internet.

          1. One can hope.

            It is also handy to know that TERF now includes people who say “sex is immutable.” Don’t know how that makes one a radical feminist, but here we are. The sky is green and grass is blue.

        2. I predict she’ll try pleading for forgiveness and get torn to shreds.

        3. Sadly, I’ll never understand what compels people with so much money they can live a life of opulence and ease without lifting so much as a finger to then delve into Internet hot-takes, get attacked by the hoi polloi, and then give two shits about the results. John McAfee has it right: say whatever you want, give zero effs, and stay rich.

          1. “Stay rich” is the key.

            She does a lot of philanthropic work. I admire that. If I had fuck-you money, I’d get myself a dream home, a housekeeper and gardener, and a new truck and then go help other people. My wants are not great in the scheme of fuck-you money.

          2. A Leap at the Wheel

            By garden, I hope you mean moat and swivel-mounted .50 cal emplacement.

            The only acceptable alternative is to go “off grid” and set surround your house with literally 2 million angry bees like fourscore.

          3. I tried that, but bumbled.

          4. Dude, no. Mansion on perfectly maintained grounds with a secret bunker and stockpile.

            Be prepared but wallow in luxury.

          5. It’s gonna be weird doing this on an acre lot in front of a colonial in Davidsonville, but I promised myself that by the time I’m 50 years old I’m going to have a pair of gargoyles with machine guns in their mouths that track targets on my front lawn.

          6. Jarflax

            I’d buy a mountain and install retractable arty and .50s.

          7. I’d put enough money in some kind of sturdy financial instrument (or combination, likely) such that I could live off dividends with enough ready cash to never have to not buy something when I wanted it, buy a large patch of land for my compound, a couple of vacation places (I’m thinking somewhere on the Gulf and maybe a place in Virginia Beach), and then split my time between goofing off, funding causes that are important to me, and being an angel investor. I could do that with a surprisingly low (all things considered) amount of money, I think.

          8. Raston Bot

            in her defense, she was speaking out about someone else being fired.

          9. Yes, I know. And she was “brave” in today’s climate for doing so.

            I thought she’d gone FULL SJW, so this is refreshing.

    3. Gustave Lytton

      I don’t care if the Fed was debt free and running a budget surplus. They shouldn’t be spending a dime for the NEA (which should be abolished) or the Kennedy Center for Fucking Celebrities While Taxpayers Get the Bill.

    4. Gadfly

      It includes more than $1 billion in new foreign-aid funding without any discussion about what we’re getting for this funding.

      Well current opinion in Washington is that getting anything for foreign aid is a quid-pro-quo, so this is fine.

  38. straffinrun

    More drunken ranting/cob web clearing. Apart from the “subsource” stuff that’s driving me nuts, complaining about the 17 “mistakes” in the FISA application proving that the FBI was biased about Trump is also bugging me. Yes, they fucked Carter Page and by extension Trump on that. However, the FBI is always going to find a way to justify moar excuses for surveillance. The state will always find excuses to trample civil liberties and it’s foolish to think that if we just stand up for Trump in this case, we’ll set a new standard. You may set a new standard, but that standard won’t be applied to us peons.

    1. leon

      For sure. My Takeaway is that when Cops have their sights set in on you, there is nothing – No Law, no ethical norm, no common decency – that will stop them from getting you. Part of it is that they are taught “My job is to get the guy” and not “My Job is to get the right guy”. Part of it is that those jobs attract the worst people in society.

      As for the SubSource stuff, i don’t do intel. But it made sense to me in a hierarchical fashion. Steele maintained his own network of informants so he was the Source (contractor) and those informants were the “Sub Source” (Sub-Contractor)

      1. straffinrun

        The subsource thing was more about how Comey was using jargon in his interview with Wallace when he should’ve used language the public would’ve understood. “The actual” source of the info said it was bullshit. Use that phrase, Comey. And yes, as libertarians, we shouldn’t fall for the idea that only Top Men are the victims of “go gettim’” mentality that permeates the FBI. It’s scarier to believe that they do this shit to everybody and not just Trump.

    2. Fourscore

      Those 17 mistakes were caused by a lack of funding. You can’t expect janitors with out a law degree to be perfect every time. FBI needs more money, more people, more supervisors that care.

    3. Idle Hands

      The thing that kills me the most about all this coverage is the lack of context of what a FISA warrant actually does or is. It’s not just a simple tap on Carter Pages phone, from what I understand it’s a tap of everyone within like 3-4 degrees of him. So his boss and his bosses boss and his bosses bosses boss are all monitored if he makes a phone call or communicates with them. Its a license to spy on everyone in the chain as if they were just tapping him they weren’t. The caveat with a tap like that is nothing they get on it is admissible but rest assured they heard and listened to phone calls that Donald J Trump made himself. At a mininum every single person involved in the investigation deserves to be fired(something Hilary would have done for certain and without any coverage if she won) and tried for crimes. If I was in charge I’d go scorched earth on the every single one of these agencies and spy services.

  39. Raston Bot

    Reps. Jeff Van Drew, D-N.J., and Collin Peterson, D-Minn., voted against both articles of impeachment. Rep. Jared Golden, D-Maine, voted in favor of impeaching Trump on abuse of power, but not on obstruction of Congress.

    Another Democrat, presidential candidate and Hawaii Rep. Tulsi Gabbard, voted “present” on both impeachment resolutions.

    in case anyone wondered how they voted.

    1. Drake

      My Rep., from the other end of the state in my gerrymandered district, pretended to be considering which way to vote. I doubt he fooled anyone.

    2. A Leap at the Wheel

      Voting to impeach your political rival in the upcoming presidential election sounds like a conflict of interest and abuse of power to me.

    3. leon

      Tulsi is clearly over the DNC/Establishment Democrats.

      Reason had an article about her and Amash talking about how it was rare to see someone buck party for principle. Which i found odd. I guess it makes sense if you are arguing a “Moral Relativism” theory of principles, in which each person’s principles are unique to them and it’s just good that they kept to them. But then couldn’t you say the same thing about every reps vote?

      I get that bucking the party shows that you are doing something costly, and so the explanations is for principle, but couldn’t you also argue that the Democrats are being principled for voting for impeachment when they know it won’t succeed and that it most likely will cost them? Or you could argue that the Republicans are being principled because they strongly feel that the impeachment is wrong and know that they will catch flack in the popular eye for voting against it?

      1. Tundra

        A present vote is lame. Just fucking vote no.

        1. TARDIS

          Surely it’s a sign of her excellent leadership skills. A principled stand even.

        2. A Leap at the Wheel

          Nah, I think she did the right thing. Sometimes, if you chose not to decide, you really aren’t making a choice. She’s conflicted out of making a choice.

          It would be lame for someone who’s not conflicted out to vote present

          1. Drake

            Laziness and indecision are two different things. Neither are admirable but one is worse in my view.

          2. CPRM

            if you chose not to decide, you really aren’t making a choice. you still have made a choice. – Metallica – Little Drummer Boy

          3. Uh no. Rush. “Free Will”

          4. I thought it was Dr. Doom.

          5. CPRM

            Joke

            Mojeaux’ head.

          6. Well, it’s not the first time in the last few days.

          7. robc

            You made it too easy with “Little Drummer Boy” and Mojeaux still wiffed.

          8. Meh, I’m chalking it up to stress and extreme emotional lability. I didn’t actually stop to think about it before my fingers got to walking all over the keyboard.

          9. I didn’t actually stop to think about it before my fingers got to walking all over the keyboard.

            Boots are made for walking!

            -Taylor Swift, ‘Just Like A Pill’

          10. Uh, no. Nancy Sinatra.

          11. Mojeaux, they’re doing it on purpose.

          12. Nancy Sinatra

            So did I.

          13. pan fried wylie

            You made it too easy with “Little Drummer Boy”

            That’s NOT an actual Metallica song?

          14. Tundra

            I read her explanation.

            I’m sticking with lame.

          15. A Leap at the Wheel

            I’m changing my vote to lame after reading that.

          16. Yeah, me too. If you think he should be impeached, vote for impeachment. If the case for impeachment was poisoned by the partisanship of the people involved, then you’re against it; vote “no”.

          17. CPRM

            Just what a RUSHUN ASSET would say!

  40. TARDIS

    The poor woman sitting behind Schumer looks somewhat displeased, I’d say. It’s like his diaper needs changing.

  41. The Late P Brooks

    Game over, man

    Trump also faced rebuke by more than 700 leading American historians who signed an open letter which said he should be removed.

    “It is our considered judgment,” the historians wrote, “that if President Trump’s misconduct does not rise to the level of impeachment, then virtually nothing does.”

    TW: Guardian.

    Also prominently featured is the preposterous claim that Republican Senators are duty bound to ignore their duty to represent the wishes of the people who elected them, and pretend to be impartial jurors. Because the Democrats in Congress have conducted their investigation in a COMPLETELY apolitical and impartial manner.

    1. leon

      I don’t see how you can’t be an impartial juror and take into account the procedures that were used in the house? Are jurors not allowed to balk at questionable police tactics? I think ignoring that would make you partial.

    2. Rebel Scum

      I don’t gather those historians are very familiar with history.

      1. They probably read Zinn, so are worse than ignornant.

    3. pan fried wylie

      Leaving aside how one “leads” the field of American History (wait, are they specialists in American History, or Historians of American Descent?)…There’s seven hundred “leaders”?

    1. leon

      From the Dissent

      Any American can choose not to purchase health insurance without legal consequence. Before January 1, 2018, individuals had to choose between complying with the Affordable Care Act’s coverage requirement or making a payment to the IRS. For better or worse, Congress has now set that payment at $0. Without any enforcement mechanism to speak of, questions about the legality of the individual “mandate” are purely academic, and people can purchase insurance—or not—as they please. No more need be said; it has long been settled that the federal courts deal in cases and controversies, not academic curiosities.

      Penaltax was bad. But the idea that that the federal government can mandate you to do whatever it wants you to do because there is not punishment is arguable worse.

      1. A Leap at the Wheel

        And its not like putting the issue off is going to manage this guy’s docket any better. The ACA has used an incredible amount of lawyer and judge time.

        Sadly, for some judges, that’s more important than getting a decision right, and he still fucks this up.

    2. leon

      Starting at the threshold issue of jurisdiction, this is a remarkably un-conservative opinion for a conservative panel on a conservative court. The individual mandate, as it now stands. has no effect. It is unforced and unenforceable. Now that Congress has zeroed out the penalty, the consequences of failing to comply with the mandate are non-existent, and the Supreme Court held as much in NFIB when it explained there were no consequences to failing to purchase insurance other than the requirement to pay a penalty—a finding essential to the Court’s conclusion that the mandate’s penalty could be understood as a tax—and now that penalty is zero. No consequences means no injury so no standing. Yet the Fifth Circuit panel here concluded otherwise

      Adlers take is a poor one IMO.

      Basically he is saying that the government can mandate anything it wants as long as there is no penalty, no one has standing to sue the government. So the Government could mandate that you vote one way, but if it doesn’t penalize you then you have no standing on Freedom of speach grounds. The fact is that some people will still follow the law regardless of their being no penalty, because they thing following the law is the right thing to do.

      It’s further disingenuous when you consider that we must uphold the thing because it’s a tax, but otherwise it’s unconstitutional, but then when it’s not a tax, you can’t ask if this is unconstitutional (something Roberts already established) when the tax is repealed because you have no standing.

      The idea he is putting forward is that when the government (the agent with a monopoly on force) says “You have to do x, but not doing so won’t give you a penalty” is not still a use of government power. In that case an employer saying “You have to have sex with me, but i’m not going to punish you if you don’t” is not exercising any illegal authority over their employees.

      1. A Leap at the Wheel

        Yeah, Adler’s take on this has the benefit of being constant in his wrongness, so at least he’s got that gong for him. He gets too caught up in the trees and loses sight of the forest.

        1. leon

          Yeah. I’m not a lawyer but Standing seems like a mess of “Fuck You government wins, you loose”. Especially in this case where, if there is a penalty, the thing is legal because it’s a tax, And if there is no penalty it’s de facto legal (even if we have the highest court saying it would be unconstitutional) because you have no standing.

          1. A Leap at the Wheel

            To be clear, I’m not a lawyer either. But I did have a public school education, so…

        2. leon

          Armchair Lawyer
          December.22.2018 at 2:55 pm

          The real issue here, is what Adler’s argument suggests.

          Imagine, for example, Trump passed a law declaring that Adler publishing or posting on the internet would be deemed illegal. As a subsection of the law however, the government would not pursue any fiscal or jail penalty for Adler breaking this law.

          Does Adler have a lawsuit against the government for passing such a law, that makes it illegal for him to publish or post on the internet? Does he have standing, has he shown any “damages?”

          Jonathan Adler
          December.22.2018 at 3:07 pm

          Nope. I would not have standing.

          You’re right about his views being consistent.

        3. leon

          Sorry to belabor this point, but i got dragged down the rabbit hole of the comments at reason. Gosh those are awful. A lot of people mad because the case doesn’t follow the rules of standing that they think are right. It’s a microcosom of what is wrong with that part of “Libertarianism”. A Slavish enthrallment to the arcane ideas of legal proceedings. Questioning the idea that maybe the standing doctrine is wrong if it creates a situation where the government can do anything it wants as long as it doesn’t punish you is just right out.

          Also geeze a lot of people who seem mad because people want to tear down the law, which is surprising to me. Why would they be reading at TOS?

  42. Drake

    Get The Hell Out Of Afghanistan Now

    We came to kill al-Qaeda. We killed heaps of those scumbags. But somehow that mission morphed into making Afghanistan a place that didn’t suck. That’s crazy. It’s always sucked and it always will suck and its suckiness is not our problem.

    Yesterday I mailed a package to a neighbor’s son who is a Marine deployed there right now. I pray that he and his whole unit get back here without any of their lives being wasted on this idiocy.

    1. leon

      He called Afghanistan a Shithole!

    2. Fourscore

      20 years ago I heard “This isn’t like the ‘Nam, this is the desert” I said “Bullshit, it’s exactly like ‘Nam without the canopy” , I could have added, “Only longer”.

      Hope your friend (and all his associates) get to enjoy Christmas at home next year.

    3. Bob Boberson

      Kurt Schlichter can be a real tard on LOTS of issues but I am glad to see the right pivot to non-interventionism. I hope it lasts.

    4. wdalasio

      Honestly, if Ron Paul had given a speech in that tone, he’d have been president. I hear a lot of people say that non-interventionism doesn’t sell with conservatives. I disagree. Casting America as the bad guy (cynically, yes, even when we are) doesn’t sell with conservatives.

  43. The Late P Brooks

    Of course, that “imparti9al juror” business is just more smokescreen for why the trial in the Senate needs to be a secret ballot.

    Because fuck the voters. We’re saving democracy.

  44. I. B. McGinty

    “Give me your best insult along the following parameters:

    Cannot contain any of George Carlin’s forbidden words.
    No racial, ethnic, or sexual epithets.
    Thats it. No swearing, no calling somebody an Indio.”

    I don’t think I can…

    Jizz mop? Nope, too sexual.

    Eurotrash? Nope, too ethnic.

    1. Intersectional Progressive.

      1. Ozymandias

        Sick burn!

      2. Fourscore

        OMG! UCS said the IP word! The gloves are off.

    1. Agreement renewal talks broke down.

      1. CPRM

        Their king did break the accords.

        1. A Leap at the Wheel

          He’s not the true king. He is a puppet of western CIA handlers and broke centuries old law and custom in military coup. Killmonger was the lawful king and was executed in the coup.

          1. mexican sharpshooter

            I was partial to armored rhino guy myself.

    2. leon

      I wouldn’t make it as a tester for these things because i would use things like “Elbonia” for testing and have one of it’s exports being “Mud of varying qualities”. That would get leaked and then i’d get fired.

      1. “Hydrolically Extracted Alluvial Minerals”, Leon.

        1. And don’t forget ‘Pottery precursors’ and ‘Health and Beauty products’

          1. Fourscore

            There should be a disclaimer on the Health and Beauty, like YMMV. I can attest that some manufacturers’
            stuff isn’t working but hope springs eternal for some of the fairer sex.

      2. A Leap at the Wheel

        A few first-class militaries have specifications for muds of varying qualities to test the reliability of rifles. The army once had to rerun a bunch of reliability tests because it was discovered that some of their mud was out of spec.

        1. Fourscore

          We offer the best mud, high quality, comes with a guarantee to wear out any thing you can put in it, on it or through it.

          Kids excepted, of course.

        2. Not Adahn

          You can totally get NIST-traceable Certified Reference Material mud. And lime leaves. And pine needles, and…

  45. SugarFree

    “Did your parents have any children that lived?”

    1. Charles Easterly

      “Did your parents have any children that lived?”

      “Sir, yes Sir!”

      “I bet they regret that.”

      1. SugarFree

        It’s simply the best insult.

        Just like the best threat is: “I used to fuck guys like you in prison.”

        1. Charles Easterly

          That scene from Full Metal Jacket made me think of how a Drill Sergeant must have a repertoire of insults, and also reactive/secondary insults.

          Below I posted two insults of my own (admittedly, I was not being my best), and I recall thinking during the delivery what reactions I would have to respond to. Typing this now, I am reminded of the late Don Rickles.

          This, SF, is not the best example I have seen of Rickles, yet I think that it should suffice.

          1. The only believable part of that half movie was when the bathroom got redecorated.

          2. Charles Easterly

            “The only believable part of that half movie was when the bathroom got redecorated.”

            Please elaborate for the sleep deprived and others.

          3. I was trying to avoid spoilers. But I expected the sergeant to be shot sooner.

        2. AlexinCT

          Just like the best threat is: “I used to fuck guys like you in prison.”

          ROAD HOUSE!

    1. Raston Bot

      that did what all reviews aspire to do. namely, let us know if we should see it sober.

      p.s. parking was ample

    2. A Leap at the Wheel

      With a name like Farrier, you’d expect him to be reviewing horses, not cats.

      1. “Unlike the thoroughbred, this breed’s leg bones are not hollow twigs.”

    3. I cannot imagine a thing I’d rather see less, and I’m including a surprise vasectomy on myself.

    4. Rebel Scum

      Speaking of cats, my petite, female feline won’t stay out of the tree. Every day I come home and have to re-flair it out and replace the ornaments. It is a fake tree and she gets on the top of second of the three pieces, plays and flattens all the branches.

      1. A Leap at the Wheel

        Could be worse. I saw a post on /r/guns recently where a guy has a sticker that says “Check Gun Safe For Cat Before Closing”

        1. Rebel Scum

          Incidentally she does try to get into my gun cabinet* when I have it open.

          *Which, of course, has been empty since I tried to transport my collection down the James in a paddle-wheel during a thunderstorm. Wouldn’t you know it, the damn thing capsized.

        2. Tundra

          A friend of mine was arguing with her husband while she was loading the dryer. She punched start and went out of the room to continue the battle.

          Moments later they heard it:

          “rowr!”

          *thunk*

          “rowr!”

          *thunk*

          “rowr!”

          *thunk*

          Yep. Kitty took a ride in the dryer. He was ok, though.

          1. Rebel Scum

            I feel kind of bad for laughing at that as hard as I did. But I do make a point to keep the cats out of the laundry room.

      2. My old male cat won’t either. He clambers in between the presents and is probably drinking the water out of the tree stand. He’s senile, too, so he does it like every twenty minutes as if he’s just noticed there’s a tree in the room. Which I guess is nice, kind of like getting a surprise birthday party every few minutes.

        1. Water? What for?

          /artificial tree

          1. Look at Mr. Moneybags over here with his fancy fake tree!

            Seriously, I was astonished to find out how much a decent artificial tree goes for.

          2. I actually don’t have a tree, but gorwing up we had one fake tree for the whole time. Amortized, it was cheaper and less hassle than dealing with live.

          3. Tundra

            And worth every dime. Ours is pre-lit-too. If I had the storage room, I wouldn’t even take the decorations off.

            Love my fake tree.

          4. We do the $45 Home Depot job every year, string the lights, the whole shebang. It smells like a real tree, which is nice. On the other hand, we have to get rid of it, no matter how much water and “tree preserver” crap you put in the stand it sheds needles like a Golden Retriever, and by mid-January you’ve got a 6′ tall dead tree to deal with.

          5. mexican sharpshooter

            Especially with LEDs. Minimal fire hazard and I can forget to turn it off because its using like 5w.

      3. Mine thinks he’s a puppy and plays fetch. Unfortunately, he wanted to play fetch at 430 a.m. amd attacked my sleeping face, awakening me violently, then he dropped his toy on me and jumped up and down on me.

    5. Not Adahn

      I cannot wait for this to be on Netflix.

  46. The Late P Brooks

    Shocking revelation

    Millennial investors residing in California are packing their bags for friendlier tax climes.

    That was one of the findings from a recent analysis by financial services firm Wealthfront. The company studied more than 200,000 clients, defining millennials as those born between 1980 and 1994.

    Half of the young clients who are planning to leave California are fleeing to locales with lower taxes, according to the data.

    More than 1 in 3 millennials who are moving from the Golden State are heading to states with no income tax, Wealthfront found.

    Meanwhile, 14% of these young investors are leaving California for places with low property taxes.

    Wealthfront’s findings are reflective of a larger trend. Last year, a total of 691,145 Californians packed up for other destinations, according to Census data.

    I don’t even know what to say.

    *staggers toward fainting couch*

    1. Will they be self-aware enough to not vote for the policies that made their previous homes untenable?

    2. mexican sharpshooter

      Millennial investors? Doesn’t that imply millennials have money and not soul-crushing piles of debt?

      1. defining millennials as those born between 1980 and 1994

        By that metric I am one. My debt is well managed, consisting of a mortgage and a car loan, both of which are on their way to being paid off. I even have savings – and I’m too lazy to get a real job. Imagine what a motivated person would have.

        1. A Leap at the Wheel

          “Imagine what a motivated person would have.”
          I don’t have to imagine. I can see them when I lick the windows on the office buildings before they haul me away.

      2. A Leap at the Wheel

        some of them majored in STEM fields. Lots of them don’t have kids.

        1. mexican sharpshooter

          I am a millennial, I majored in Chemistry, I have a mortgage, savings, and investments.

          I’m mocking the stereotype.

    3. KSuellington

      Hopefully they aren’t going to act like the East Coasters that came to California and brought with them their votes for more taxes and more gun regs.

      1. JaimeRoberto Delecto

        Amen. Fucking carpetbaggers ruined California.

  47. Rebel Scum

    Gone rogue…

    House Speaker Nancy Pelosi on Thursday defended her decision to hold off on sending impeachment articles to the Senate, calling Mitch McConnell a “rogue leader” in an unusual press conference where she repeatedly tried to shut down questions about the impeachment process.

    Pelosi spoke to reporters after Democrats passed two articles of impeachment against President Trump in a Wednesday evening vote. She indicated the House would eventually send the articles over to the upper chamber, but insisted it is up to the Senate to determine how the process develops going forward.

    “The next thing for us will be when we see the process that is set forth in the Senate, then we’ll know the number of managers that we may have to go forward, and who we would choose,” Pelosi said during a Thursday morning press conference.

    1. leon

      House Speaker Nancy Pelosi on Thursday defended her decision to hold off on sending impeachment articles to the Senate, calling Mitch McConnell a “rogue leader”

      Look i can get how if you are convinced that you are defending democracy that anyone against you is clearly against democracy (“If you aren’t with us, you are against us”). But if you are even slightly not convinced that this is the case, wouldn’t you be worried that the Speaker is going around saying all the other elected leaders in government are illegitimate?

    2. I’ve been–very, very rarely–wrong about things before, but I suspect that the Democrats have stepped all over their own collective dick good and hard here. In the short term, they’ve burnt some bridges with moderates while failing to adequately deliver what the TDS leftists really wanted. In her flailing efforts to offer excuses to people who say things like, “YASSSSSS QUEEEN!” to AOC on Twitter, she’s going to irrevocably piss away any chance she had of getting Senate Republicans to offer a way for her to save face in the impeachment trial. In the longer term, the impeachment vote will cost vulnerable Democrats their seats and make Pelosi look weak. The Democrats may very well lose the House over this AND further weaken the moderates in the party.

      1. Bob Boberson

        That or this is Mueller Report 2.0…..”We drug that out through the mid-terms, we just need to keep this charade up through Nov 2020″

        Honestly I’m not sure at this point. They’re either cunningly stupid or stupidly cunning.

        1. Pelosi’s a wily bugger, but this has the feel of having a tiger by the tail. I’m not sure she’s fully in control of the pace of this thing, and hasn’t been for some time. Like she’s been scrambling to stay in front of the parade so that everyone knows she’s leading it, type of thing.

          1. Raston Bot

            it was her only move and it’s a delaying tactic more than anything. the votes are not there in the Senate.

            Brit Hume called it: this was half-assed

    3. wdalasio

      You’ve got to be kidding me. As far as I’m concerned, McConnell should start making a joke out of the entire thing. If McConnell pussies out on this, the Republicans deserve what they get. The Senate isn’t answerable to the House. And the Majority Leader should make a point of reminding the Speaker of that.

    4. Raston Bot

      “Rogue Leader” has a cool ring to it. Cocaine Mitch’s team will run with it. turn that pejorative into a positive.

  48. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

    My biggest fear in life is passing gas in my office, but realizing that I actually sharted. Am I the only one who has nightmares about this?

    1. Bob Boberson

      Depends.

      1. *thunderous applause*

      2. Charles Easterly

        “My biggest fear in life is passing gas in my office, but realizing that I actually sharted. Am I the only one who has nightmares about this?”

        “Depends.”

        Nicely deposited.

        1. Rebel Scum

          Consider this pun number 2.

          1. leon

            I wish i could float puns like you guys.

          2. Bob Boberson

            It’s more about pushing them out

          3. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

            Those who can’t teach, those who can dodo

    2. A Leap at the Wheel

      “Nightmares? No, not nightmares.”
      -German guy

    3. leon

      I never ever ever had a dream about showing up to school in my underwear.

      Then one day a few months ago i had one about showing up to a work briefing in my briefs.

    4. Red Pill Matt

      I’ve done that. I was a little sick at the time. I was able to go home without anyone knowing.

      1. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

        Thank you for the serious response on a serious question, Matt. I ate Thai food last night and I am currently working in fear.

        1. mindyourbusiness

          Hope noting happens; if I had an embarrassing accident from chowing down on Thai food people would surely banh mi.

      2. Bob Boberson

        That’s a heck of a first comment, Tulpa.

        /haven’t been around much, sorry if you’ve posted before

        1. For real, talk about goin’ hard in the paint.

    5. JaimeRoberto Delecto

      Is that you, Swalwell?

      1. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

        Well done

  49. Bob Boberson

    I’m watching Rifftrax “Santa’s Summer House” since I have nothing to do today. It may be the most laughably bad movie I’ve seen them riff on yet and they’ve done some REALLY bad movies. It has the feel of a medium-budget porno that refuses to get past the dialogue/story part.

    Anyhoo……is 9AM too early to start drinking?

    1. Not Adahn

      In which time zone?

    2. Rebel Scum

      is 9AM too early to start drinking?

      Does a shower-beer count?

    3. Plinker762

      It’s a good day to stay home because as usual, Spokane can’t do proper snow control for the morning commute.

      1. Bob Boberson

        Ah, good to see you here when I’m still on! Yeah, I figured the roads would be a disaster this morning so I’m chilling by the wood stove. Let me know if you’d like to grab beer sometime: mtman four one nine at gee mail

        1. Plinker762

          Will do. I have some travel for work coming up so it will be after the holidays.

      2. Hudson

        I’ll probably have to chain up to get home today because I decided to live up a fucking mountain.

        But so far it is not looking as bad as the winter storm warning sounds.

  50. Gadfly

    Cannot contain any of George Carlin’s forbidden words.
    No racial, ethnic, or sexual epithets.
    Thats it. No swearing, no calling somebody an Indio.

    The only one’s I can think of that fit these parameters are some of Shakespeare’s insults. I’m partial to “you are not worth the dust that the rude wind blows in your face”.

    1. leon

      Did you Bite your thumb at me sir?

    2. mexican sharpshooter

      Good

  51. AlmightyJB

    You are the scum that scum scrapes off it’s shoes.

    Stolen from Carla Tortelli.

    1. mexican sharpshooter

      You’re better than that.

      1. AlmightyJB

        Not really

  52. AlmightyJB

    “Terrible, terrible lapse in judgment, but it does not make him a terrible man.”

    Umm…

    https://www.foxnews.com/us/american-airlines-mechanic-pleads-guilty-to-sabotaging-plane-in-miami

    1. I’ve never had a problem deciding whether or not sabotaging a passenger jet would be a morally good or bad thing to do.

  53. Shirley Knott

    You remind me of Amy Schumer. Just maybe not as masculine.

  54. Charles Easterly

    “Cannot contain any of George Carlin’s forbidden words.
    No racial, ethnic, or sexual epithets.
    Thats it. No swearing, no calling somebody an Indio.”

    Here is an exchange that actually occurred:

    Charles: “Do you know what I like about you?”
    Them: “No.”
    Charles: “Me either.”

    Here is another one: “You are solidified flatulence.”

    Given the general comity some of you have seen me display in my commentary on “TOS” and here, I will leave it up to you to surmise whether the recipients of the above comments were deserving of such acrimony.

    1. mexican sharpshooter

      Charles: “Do you know what I like about you?”
      Them: “No.”
      Charles: “Me either.”

      *golf clap*

  55. The Late P Brooks

    Pelosi spoke to reporters after Democrats passed two articles of impeachment against President Trump in a Wednesday evening vote. She indicated the House would eventually send the articles over to the upper chamber, but insisted it is up to the Senate to determine how the process develops going forward.

    “The next thing for us will be when we see the process that is set forth in the Senate, then we’ll know the number of managers that we may have to go forward, and who we would choose,” Pelosi said during a Thursday morning press conference.

    Something something don’t ask a question you don’t already know the answer to.

  56. The Late P Brooks

    Hopefully they aren’t going to act like the East Coasters that came to California and brought with them their votes for more taxes and more gun regs.

    An old Roy Rogers movie from the early fifties, probably, came on the other morning. I watched it for a while. California really was like paradise on earth, seventy or eighty years ago. Look at it now.

  57. Raston Bot

    McConnell in “no hurry”

    https://www.washingtonexaminer.com/news/campaigns/no-hurry-mcconnell-waves-off-pelosi-threat-to-withhold-impeachment-articles

    Senate Republicans, led by McConnell, have settled on a trial strategy that forgoes witness testimony and would move straight to a vote to convict or acquit Trump after hearing arguments from House Democrats and Trump’s legal team.

    just send those articles over whenever you’re ready. i’ll be over here in the Senate approving gobs more Federal judges.

    1. wdalasio

      McConnell should make abundantly clear to Ms. Pelosi that a vote to convict or acquit is the best option she’s going to get. If she plays any more games, she’ll get a trial. A trial engineered to create such a shitstorm that people’s grandchildren will be talking about it.

      1. leon

        Yeah… The House is trying to play a weird game. I mean it could work cause they have the Propagandists on their side, but what they are trying to do is trying to sell impeachment to the Senate republicans. I think Mitchs take is the best he could give which is: I’m not interested in what you are selling.

        So now the House and Pelosi will be in the somewhat untenable position that they voted for impeachment but aren’t going to go forward with it. They can cry about the Senate all they want, but I’m not surprised if that would make Senate Republicans more staunch. Having someone who has no authority over you try to dictate what you are going to do only is going to make people less likely to do what you want.

        Not that it would matter much, cause I’m sure that the articles could be re-voted on party line again, but would the House have to re-vote at the start of the next session?

        Which is another thing, The only selling point of “Get this impeachment done now” is that democrats would agree to not do it again if Trump is acquitted. They have already undercut that with their words and actions.

  58. Jarflax

    The media has trouble understanding pistols rifles, and apparently even guns.

    1. I like how the twits in the article are done in Comic Sans. All Twits should be rendered that way, gives them the appropriate reverence and gravitas twitter deserves.

    2. leon

      Lol. Wait till they find out about the 155 mm Guns

      (yes i know those are 6 inches, but if they thing the gun is 5 inches long, then they probably don’t know how to do the conversion from mm to inches)

      1. “Those must be huge, you can fit a whole person in there”

        /journo who tried to do the math.

  59. Francisco d’Anconia

    Sorry about that.

    Never apologize!