Author: Not Adahn

IFLA: The “Klaxon Sounds” Edition of the Horoscope for the Week of November 3

How’s everyone enjoying their MERCURY RETROGRADE? While that’s always an important event, this week it’s even more so since it’s at the intersection of two otherwise independent alignments. (Hmmmm. Maybe I should submit a proposal to open an Intersectional Astrology department at some woke university somewhere.) The first one is pretty straightforward: Earth-MERCURY RETROGRADE-Jupiter. This is not a good sign unfortunately. This is domestic misrule/disorder on the magnitude of an animal hoarder. And you can’t avoid it by hiding out in a hotel or going on vacation — you’ll just come home to burst pipes, a tree branch through a window, and/or a family of raccoons nesting in your furniture. So pay attention and don’t let the dirty dishes pile up. It might also be a good idea to suspend putting out birdseed until the bears go into hibernation.

The second alignment is much trickier: Venus-MERCURY RETROGRADE-Luna. Now the Venus and the moon are the two femmiest planets in the sky, but how does that relate to them being linked by MERCURY RETROGRADE? In this case, it’s helpful to notice that BOTH of those two are in signs associated with wisdom (Sagittarius and Capricorn respectively). So because of that, it’s pretty certain that this indicates “A crazy woman gives excellent advice.” Also of note is that there is a very heave water component to all of this with the moon in Capricorn and MERCURY RETROGRADE being in Scorpio. It’s also likely that this excellent advice will contain a revealed secret, as crazy people are wont to do.

Scorpio gets screwed by losing it’s planet early and only retaining MERCURY RETROGRADE. Take extra caution when handling hazardous materials this week. The two signs I don’t mention often (because Jupiter and Saturn move slowly) have things happening this week. Both Jupiter and Venus are in Sagittarius, so virtue is going to be rewarded by more than just being virtuous. “Game” tactics are contraindicated if you’re looking to get lucky this week. Capricorn has a fascinating situation holding the moon along with Saturn. Prophetic dreams will come. This is an excellent time for vision quests, peyote trips, and other psychonautical explorations. On a personal note, these signs all bode well for the class I’ll be taking that should provide fodder for “I Fucking Hate NY, pt 2.”

Thanks to MERCURY RETROGRADE I have no electricity or internet. Therefore there will be no card readings. All refund requests will be processed in the usual manner.

Sagittarius:

Capricorn:

Aquarius:

Pisces:

Aries:

Taurus:

Gemini:

Cancer:

Leo:

Virgo:

Libra:

November 3, 2019
IFLA: The “@#!!*&# Useless Stars!” Edition of the Horoscope for the Week of October 27

There are times when one turns to the skies for advice, only for the skies to respond with “lol, get fucked. I’m going to be completely random and you can’t force me to be otherwise.” Such is the situation this week, with none of the planets wanting to have any connection or relationship with any other. Now, as contrary as the planets may want to be, they can’t avoid the fact they are actually out there in space, so we still have their relationship with the zodiac to fallback on, and one particularly interesting event will be happening.

Hail Scorpio! You begin your season already hosting Mercury and Venus for that initial luck burst, unfortunately it’s not going to last as long s you’d like, because Mercury will be going retrograde before the week is out. It will be Station Retrograde on Halloween, to be precisely. Mercury (chance, luck) retrograde (chaos) in Scorpio (secrets, darkness, genitals, creepy-crawlies) is about as perfect a Halloween event as one could hope for, so this should be a Halloween to remember.

Libra is doing its best to protect us from the conjunction of the moon with Mars (literally, the tides of war). A more self-indulgent reading of this would be that this week is an auspicious time to partake of martial games or simulations.

The cards have lots of reversed swords, warning against violence. This is not a big deal for a bunch of NAPpers

Scorpio: 6 of Swords reversed – Declaration, confession, publicity, a proposal of love

Sagittarius: 2 of Cups – Love, passion, friendship, affinity, union, concord, sympathy, the interrelation of the sexes

Capricorn: Ace of Coins reversed – The evil side of wealth, bad intelligence; also great riches.

Aquarius: 4 of Cups – Weariness, disgust, aversion, imaginary vexations, blended pleasure. Since the source predates Fred Waring, daiquiris are not what is being referenced in that last bit.

Pisces: Page of Coins – Application, study, scholarship, reflection, news, messages and the bringer thereof; also rule, management.

Aries: 4 of Wands – Country life, haven of refuge, repose, concord, harmony, prosperity, peace.

Taurus: The Hireophant – Marriage, alliance, captivity, servitude, mercy and goodness; inspiration

Gemini: The World – Assured success, recompense, voyage, route, emigration, flight, change of place

Cancer: 9 of Wands reversed – Obstacles, adversity, calamity.

Leo: Knight of Wands reversed – Anecdotes, announcements, evil news, indecision, instability

Virgo: Page of Swords reversed – competent person working against you, unforeseen situations, unpreparedness.

Libra: King of Swords reversed – Cruelty, perversity, barbarity, perfidy, evil intention.

October 27, 2019
IFLA: The “Absent Context” Edition of the Horoscope for the Week of October 20

Drive seventeen miles from my house, then get out of the car and hike another mile and a half.

I am writing this during a rare moment of downtime in my vacation. I’ve been unable to read Glibs for the most part — partway through the comments on Mojeaux’s 101, so I am wondering exactly how many new memes have been birthed and died, and exactly how unrecognizable the glibscape is going to be once things are back to “normal.”

Harris’ Hawk coming in for a landing

No alignments of note, though I will note that the top of Cascade Mountain would be a most excellent place to do some stargazing, assuming that the wind didn’t kill you.

Harris’ Hawks are social raptors, meaning that they understand the importance of mugging for the camera. Owls tell you to go fuck yourself if you pull out a phone while holding them.

As for the regular planetary visitations, Libra is keeping conflict in balance (whether this is good or bad depends largely on your viewpoint), and Venus and Mercury in Scorpio bring tidings that your favorite porn will be easily available in high quality. The one new thing, the moon in Cancer, has two possible meanings, but because of the relative position of Saturn the correct interpretation is “a great secret will be created,” so if you’re not the one making secrets, someone’s keeping one from you. There might be a way of diving who this person is, but I’m too busy to do that at the moment.

Owls land vastly more lightly than hawks. Even considering the size difference.

As for the cards, not terribly great. There’s a typical amount of bad luck and good, but the good luck is for minor things while the bad is for major. So if you get a particularly good sandwich, don’t eat it while walking or you’re liable to fall into an uncovered manhole.

Libra: Ace of Cups reversed – House of the false heart, mutation, instability, revolution.

Scorpio: King of Wands reversed – A severe, austere, dark man. Attack from a lion.

Sagittarius: 3 of Coins – Métier, trade, skilled labor, nobility, aristocracy, renown, glory.

Capricorn: 3 of Wands reversed – The end of troubles, suspension or cessation of adversity, toil and disappointment.

Aquarius: The Sun reversed – Material happiness, fortunate marriage, contentment, but to a lesser extent or with added difficulties than if the card had been drawn upright.

Pisces: The Hermit reversed – Concealment, disguise, policy, fear, unreasoned caution.

Aries: 4 of Cups – Weariness, disgust, aversion, imaginary vexations, “wine is now offered the wastrel, but he sees no consolation therein,” blended pleasure.

Taurus: 5 of Wands – Imitation, sham fight, strenuous competition and struggle, gold, gain, opulence.

Gemini: 9 of Wands reversed – Obstacles, adversity, calamity.

Cancer: The Fool – Folly, mania, extravagance, intoxication, delirium, frenzy, bewrayment

Leo: The Tower – Misery, distress, indigence, adversity, calamity, disgrace, deception, ruin, unforeseen catastrophe.

Virgo: The Chariot reversed – Riot, quarrel, dispute, litigation, defeat.

Finally, in case I’m not caught up by the time this goes live, another invitation to come shoot at my club. Details here. I’ve posted pictures of the pistol I’ll be using here before; otherwise, I’ll be the middle-aged white guy with a beard wearing green Howard Leight earpro, safety glasses and a hat.

Two trails diverged in a yellow wood. And I… I took the one more traveled by, because it was slightly shorter and led to a better view.

October 20, 2019
IFLA: The “OoO” Edition of the Horoscope for the Week of October 13

The bad part about taking a vacation and not glibbing for a while is I have a stupid completionist drive that means that I have to go back to where I left off and read all the articles and comments before getting to the current stuff.

The skies don’t have an overall theme this week. Sun-Mercury-Saturn portends endings, and Sun-Earth-Moon which we’ve already discussed before (in case you don’t remember — balance, harmony, righteousness, general empowerment). Mercury conjoined with Venus in Scorpio warns of a syphilis outbreak, hopefully this won’t affect anyone here. There is a dual reading to Mars in Libra: a stalemate, or a balance broken by hostilities. Usually you can tell by the way Mars relates to the other planets, but this time it’s just doing its own thing.

This weeks draws are as follows:

Libra: 10 of Coins – Gain, riches; family matters, archives, extraction, the abode of a family

Scorpio: The Star – Loss, theft, privation, abandonment, hope and bright prospects

Sagittarius: Blank card, the Card with No Face – Freedom, removal of limitations, Spaghetti Westerns

Capricorn: Page of Swords – Authority, overseeing, secret service, vigilance, spying, examination

Aquarius: 2 of Cups – Love, passion, friendship, affinity, union, concord, sympathy, the interrelation of the sexes

Pisces: 7 of Swords reversed – Good advice, counsel, instruction, slander, babbling

Aries: 4 of Cups – Weariness, disgust, aversion, imaginary vexations

Taurus: Queen of Cups – Good, fair woman; honest, devoted woman, who will do service to you; loving intelligence, and hence the gift of vision; success, happiness, pleasure; also wisdom, virtue; a perfect spouse and a good mother

Gemini : 3 of Coins – Métier, trade, skilled labor, nobility, aristocracy, renown, glory

Cancer: The Emperor – Stability, power, protection, realization, a great person, aid, reason, conviction, authority, will

Leo: The Sun reversed – Material happiness, fortunate marriage, contentment

Virgo: Knight of Cups – Arrival, approach–sometimes that of a messenger; advances, proposition, demeanor, invitation, incitement

October 13, 2019
IFLA: The “Visitors, Travel by Air, Young Dark Woman” Edition of the Horoscope for the Week of October 6

I predict this week that a dear friend, a lovely (former stripper) and intelligent (degree in Math) woman will come to visit me. We shall see how the Albany airport will fare against my prognosticatory abilities.

For the rest of you less fortunate ones, here’s what the stars have to say:

Jupiter (rulership, rules, order happiness — the astrologers who came up with this were filthy statists, but that’s probably a necessary thing to get research grants from kings. Plus ca change etc. ) has got a double leg construction (though neither of them are particularly tight.) On one leg there’s the sun and Mercury (good news, beneficent change in leadership, strength and growth) and on the other there’s Mars and Venus (marriage, righteous war/just peace, domestic reconciliation) and together they form a “V,” which of course means “victory” though also the door knocks of fate and “va fangul.”

Libra lets Mercury slip away, but with the Sun, Mars and Venus (plus the association of the latter two with Jupiter as mentioned above) all being in the sign of Balance we are looking at a brief period of universal harmony. Honestly, this is a ridiculously unlikely prediction considering everything that’s going on, but let’s look back on the results during work week 42 and see how clear my foresight is. Mercury moves into Scorpio, signifying a buff to your speed and agility, but also the risk of poisoning. Coupled with this, Capricorn receiving the moon in addition to its usual Saturn further signals enhancement to mental/creative abilities, but there is a dark undercurrent. If you need to figure out how to break contracts or off someone, this is the best week to plan.

Events in my life may be bleeding over into the cards I’m drawing. Eleven of the twelve cards are designated “woman.”

Libra: 10 of Cups reversed – Repose of the false heart, indignation, violence.

Scorpio: Wheel of Fortune – Destiny, fortune, success, elevation, luck, felicity

Sagittarius: 2 of Wands reversed – Surprise, wonder, enchantment, emotion, trouble, fear

Capricorn: 3 of Cups – The conclusion of any matter in plenty, perfection and merriment; happy issue, victory, fulfilment, solace, healing

Aquarius: 4 of Coins – The surety of possessions, cleaving to that which one has, gift, legacy, inheritance

Pisces: Page of Coins – Application, study, scholarship, reflection, news, messages and the bringer thereof; also rule, management

Aries: Knight of Coins – Utility, serviceableness, interest, responsibility, rectitude

Taurus: 8 of Cups – The decline of a matter, or that a matter which has been thought to be important is really of slight consequence–either for good or evil

Gemini: 2 of Coins reversed – Enforced gaiety, simulated enjoyment, literal sense, handwriting, composition, letters of exchange

Cancer: 3 of Cups – The conclusion of any matter in plenty, perfection and merriment; happy issue, victory, fulfilment, solace, healing (First time doubles have been drawn?)

Leo: The World – Assured success, recompense, voyage, route, emigration, flight, change of place

Virgo: 6 of Cups – Childhood, happiness, enjoyment coming from the past, things that have vanished

October 6, 2019
IFLA: The “Maybe it’s Me?” Edition of the Horoscope for the Week of September 29

Usually when the skies are empty, I figure it’s just a whim of orbital mechanics. But it’s very unusual to see things this quiet two weeks in a row. So to pad things out I’m going to incorporate a controversial construction. The obvious bit is the alignment with the moon being between the Earth and the sun. This happens every month and is a generally energizing thing (though less so than the equally common Sun-Earth-Moon arrangement. The extremely rare Earth-Sun-Moon alignment portends the extinction of all life on the planet). So to save us from tedium, we’re going to look at a quasi-alignment, thus:

Mars should be angry, Venus should be female, and Saturn should be grumpy, but w/e.

See how neither Jupiter nor Saturn quite lines up, but they both almost do, and in equal but opposite ways? That last bit is what transforms it from “random shit I just made up” to (debatably) “confirmed astrological science.” Now these equal and oppositional forces don’t negate each other (otherwise they wouldn’t be present to be read) but rather you combine them as vector multiplication (see Math = SCIENCE!) and generate a new influence in the direction of the cross-product. When you combine that with the male/female dynamic embodied by Mars/Venus, the surface-level interpretation is “Government enacts new population control measure.” And surface-level analysis is all you’re going to get from me today, the brain is pretty worn out from not sleeping right for two weeks. So expect GND, increased funding for contraception/abortion, reducing parent subsidies and anything else that inhibits the conception of new humans.

Libra’s got a whole passel of goodness, not only grabbing the typical inner planets (for love and luck) but also the moon (for that extra bit of good fortune). What they don’t have is Mars, so while everything is going your way, don’t fuck it up by being too aggressive. On that note, Mars is in Virgo, so expect unjustified aggression and various bits of cuntery.

The cards say the week is going to start poorly, but finish much better, with you avoiding a major mishap.

Libra: 4 of Coins reversed – delay, suspense, opposition

Scorpio: 7 of Wands reversed – Perplexity, embarrassments, anxiety

Sagittarius: Queen of Cups reversed – Either a good woman, or a woman who appears distinguished but is not to be trusted, perversity, vice, depravity, dishonor

Capricorn: 3 of Swords reversed – Error, loss, distraction, confusion

Aquarius: 3 of Coins – Trade, skilled labor, renown, glory

Pisces: Page of Cups – Message, application, reflection, study, fair young man who will render service

Aries: Ace of Cups reversed – False heart, mutation, instability, revolution

Taurus: 7 of Coins – Money, business, barter, success in investing, successful completion

Gemini: 9 of Wands – Strength in opposition, delay suspension, adjournment

Cancer: The Lovers – Attraction, love, beauty, trials overcome

Leo: The Tower reversed – Oppression, imprisonment, tyranny, plus lesser versions of all the bad stuff assosciated with The Tower

Virgo: 7 of Swords – Design, attempt, wish, hope, confidence; also quarrelling, a plan that may fail, annoyance

September 29, 2019
IFLA: “The Slow Day in the Skies” Edition of the Horoscope for the Week of September 22

Another one of those weeks where the planets refuse to align. But, that doesn’t men there’s no news: Saturn has returned to it’s rightful direct motion! While Capricorn isn’t out of the dark, lonely woods of space yet, at least they’re on their way out. For the rest of us, expect the worst impulses to stop, but with a general mental malaise for the next few weeks (er, actually several months. Fortunately, you’re going to forget that part.) As far as positive advice goes, Saturn direct is a very auspicious time for making righteous endings, so de-clutter your garage, kick out the couch surfer that’s overstayed their welcome, donate your unloved taxidermy to the furry charity fundraiser, that sort of thing.

Libra is pre-gaming like a mofo, poaching both Venus and Mercury. That’s really good luck for them and general good luck for the rest of us (Libra is generous like that). I’m expecting women to do well in the competition that I’ll be shooting at (barring my disqualification) when this post goes live (I’ll probably be on the fifth or sixth stage at that time). While the sun in Libra would be more auspicious for my performance, Mercury there will be helpful. Not so much Venus, though that will reduce the risk that I’ll shoot anyone. Adding to the safety enhancement is Mars in Virgo, though if I had my druthers, I’d be shooting on a day when Mars was in Sagittarius. Jupiter being in Sagittarius instead is a good sign, particularly if I’m looking to shoot cleanly (which I am). Mars in Virgo also adds to the “women shooting well” probability.

Virgo ends her months with strength, literally, holding on to Mars. Gemini hosts the moon, so good for them, but since Gemini is no Libra, the rest of us should be alert for duplicity, scheming, betrayal etc. This also amplifies the Saturnine influence, with Gemini (and obviously the moon) also signifying transition. So DTMFA.

Virgo: 4 of Swords reversed – recovery, awakening, circumspection, caution, narrow escape.

Libra: The Moon – Hidden enemies, deception, illusion, danger, terror, lunacy, plots, dreams.

Scorpio: Knight of Swords – Determination, will, anger, violence, destruction

Sagittarius: 8 of Swords – Accident, calamity, bad news, violence, crisis, censure, conflict, illness

Capricorn: 9 of Swords reversed – Struggle, doubt, shame, rumors, defiance.

Aquarius: The High Priestess – introspection, knowledge, modesty, discretion.

Pisces: Ace of Cups – Contentment, abundance, fertility, feasting, opulence, good news, birth, kindness, love

Aries: The Faceless Card. No premonitions for you!

Taurus: 2 of Cups – Love, friendship, harmony, union, relations between the sexes, sincere and mutual affection

Gemini: The Sun reversed – lesser happiness, passion, pride, misunderstanding.

Cancer: Queen of Swords – Dark unkind woman, sadness, separation.

Leo: Page of Coins – Messenger, concentration, apprenticeship, work

September 22, 2019
IFLA: The “ASTG4113” Edition of the Horoscope for the Week of September 15

So I’ve covered some of the very basics of astrology with you before, but this week we’re having to jump straight to some serious advanced level stuff to read what the skies are throwing at us. Even with all of the millennia of accumulated wisdom, there is still some ambiguity with the principal sign this week because of two principal actors: Saturn is a butthole, and retrograde motion is a jerk. So we’ve got Venus-Mars-Saturn retrograde with that last component signifying “beginning” or “really bad ending.” Now, we haven’t really talked much about angular considerations, but with this alignment we have Jupiter-Sol en tierce which excludes such interpretations as “the birth of twins” or the like. With that modification, the sign is either “Marriage,” or “Divorce the likes of which The Tudors would consider a bit extreme.” But whose? None of the planets are in Leo, so not a royal. Virgo, Capricorn, and Libra are all indicated in the “who” and Sagittarius in the “where.” A double-Virgo points to the more notable party being a woman.

While we’re waiting for that, we have the earth lining up with Mercury and Venus with the sun in opposition, which means it’s an auspicious time for drinking, carousing, gambling, and/or expanding your sexual horizons. This is confirmed by the moon being in Aries.

Virgo loses their ultra-uber status this week as they’re unable to hold on to two planet, but they maintain Mars. Expect more conflict this week, but you’ll be successful in it. There is going to be relationship stress (maybe from following the advice in the previous paragraph?) as the conflict between Libra and Mercury gets filtered through Venus. And of course, I already mentioned the moon in Aries. Full Moons? Goats? Do I really have to spell this out for you ?

Virgo: 6 of Cups reversed – Renewal, the future coming to pass

Libra: The Emperor reversed – Benevolence, compassion, credit, immaturity, obstruction, confusion to enemies

Scorpio: 2 of Wands – Riches, fortune, magnificence, physical suffering, disease, mortification

Sagittarius: 7 of Cups reversed – Desire, will, determination, project

Capricorn: 10 of Coins reversed – Chance, loss, robbery, pension, games of hazard, a gift

Aquarius: 6 of Coins – Presents, gifts, gratification

Pisces: The High Priestess reversed – Passion, moral or physical ardor, surface knowledge, conceit.

Aries: 8 0f Coins – Work, employment, craftsmanship, commission, skill in such matters

Taurus: Knight of Coins – Utility, interest, rectitude, responsibility

Gemini: The Devil – Ravage, violence, force, vehemence, extraordinary efforts

Cancer: Queen of Wands – Dark woman or countrywoman, chaste, honorable, loving

Leo: 4 of Swords – Vigilance, retreat, solitude, tomb

September 15, 2019
IFLA: The “Choose Your Own Adventure” Edition of the Horoscope for the week of Sep 8

So the skies have decided to take the week off from ruling the fates of man. No alignments. No occultations. And what conjunctions there are are only barely worth mentioning. But since that’s all there is to mention, I guess I should fulfill my Barnumian Oath of “First, give no refunds. If this means you must deliver, so be it.”

While Virgo lost it’s grip on the moon, it remains in control of the Sun, Mars, Venus and Mercury (to the extent that anyone is ever in control of Mercury.) This is not only good news for Virgo, but since that sign is a generally benevolent one (general as in General Officer, not as in usually) we all reap the benefits. Again, any time you’ve got Mars and Venus together with the sun, it’s good for your love life. The moon meandered off into Capricorn where it joins Saturn retrograde. You know how two wrongs don’t make a right but three rights make a left? Same thing here. Expect bursts of creativity, though some of it may be a bit out of the box for your tastes. Also unfortunately, if you’re fishing, the percentage of your catch being stuff you don’t want is going to be higher than normal. Remember when I explained why the majority of astrological patterns signaled bad news? The same principle lead to there being an awful lot of fishing-related omens. Hunting should be good though with Jupiter being in Sagittarius. Scanning ahead for my own benefit, that visitation is going to remain in effect for my new club orientation, so the live fire part will provide no problems whatsoever, not that I was worried. Also the skies are looking right for the match on the 22nd, in case any Glibs want to come shoot at it. We’ll revisit it in a couple of weeks, but the signs are particularly auspicious for first-time shooters then.

This weeks draw is pretty Glib-standard. Again, those influences that are there are not overwhelming this week.

Virgo: The World – Assured success, voyage, emigration, change of place

Libra: 8 of Cups reversed – Great joy, happiness, feasting

Scorpio: Queen of Cups – Success, happiness, foresight, wisdom, pleasure, virtue

Sagittarius: Queen of Swords – “Female Sadness,” embarrassment, absence, sterility, privation, separation, mourning

Capricorn: 6 of Swords – Journey by water, exile, route, way, envoy

Aquarius: 5 of Cups – Loss but something remains, inheritance, transmission, patrimony

Pisces: 4 of Cups reversed – Novelty, omen, new instructions, new relations

Aries: 5 of Swords reversed – Degradation, destruction, reversal, dishonor, loss, infamy

Taurus: 6 of Wands reversed – Apprehension, fear, treachery, disloyalty

Gemini: The Star reversed – Arrogance, impotence, haughtiness

Cancer: 2 of Cups – Love, passion, affinity, friendship, union, concord

Leo: The Devil Reversed – Evil, weakness, pettiness, blindness

September 8, 2019
Uisukibou Sanbai

From left to right… just read the damn labels!

I have no idea if I like Japanese whiskey. Let’s find out!

Tonight I have the three that the neighborhood liquor store has that are under $100/bottle. They actually have five in that latter category, including one at $325. I think I’ll be picking up a Talisker 25 year before I venture in that direction. Unlike the last time I did a glibtasting, these three are visually distinct, even if two are from the same company. For modifers/palate cleansers I have a good local cheddar, a decent semi-local chocolate and bread and fantastic local butter. Distilled water is available if I need to open any of these up, but looking at the proof I doubt that will be necessary. As with last time, I’ve got JW Black as a control and to check for palate fatigue.

Kanpai!

Same as above, but in glasses.

Suntory “Toki” Pale straw color. Not much nose. There is some toasted wood and spice, but it’s faint. It smells sweeter than I was expecting from the color and country. It tastes sweeter too. Definitely whiskey, definitely subtle. Going to try some cheese and see if that lends me any more insights. It’s a good pairing, and returning to the whiskey bring all sorts of new happenings to the forefront. If you’re going to drink this, definitely have a little protein or fat to help spread the flavor. It doesn’t have any direct analogue in my drinking experience, but it’s closest to a Speyside with a lot more of the sweet extractables from wood. I don’t know what they cask this in, but it’s responsible for most of the flavor. A good drink. It’s not particularly aggressive or challenging, but I don’t know that it is trying to be. If you ever wanted to dispel the stereotype of the Japanese being polite, reserved, non-confrontational and indirect, this is NOT the drink to go about doing it.

Mars “Iwai Tradition” Gorgeous mahogany color. I tend to really like beers that are this color. The color is so nice I keep catching myself thinking “I’m going to like this” and having to stop and reset my mind as to not prejudice the tasting – Right On Mars marketing department! This nose is more typical of bourbon, definitely less sweet but much more present than the Toki. Tasting it is surprising. It’s very smooth and clean, and seems to roll over the tongue without fully making contact. I get the impression that this is very light bodied, but body isn’t really anything one normally experiences with whiskey. The char that gives the color is very present in the mouth, with an ashy residual. Again, eating a bit of cheese really brings this to life. Eating it on a clean mouth this was like “Baby’s first bourbon,” but a bit of fat and we’re in Scotch land. When I first tasted this, I was impressed but thought it wasn’t really my thing. Now I know it can be great in the proper context. Again, this is its own beast, but closer to a Highland style with food, bourbon without.

Suntory “Hibiki” Color is amber. Nose is much more prominent than the others. There’s a lot going on with this one. Lots of esters, less sweetness. Much more interesting. Let’s see if this is worth the premium. Oh. Oh that’s good. This one is already open straight out of the glass. It starts off with bright notes like an Irish, then mellows to a very smooth long finish. Cheese brings out the toasted flavors, but the transformation is much less than the earlier two. I hate to say it because of the price differential, but the Hibiki is obviously superior to the first ones. I also can’t tie it as readily to another style for a comparison. But it’s excellent.

So, did I learn anything about Japanese whiskey? Do I have a better idea of what “Japanese Whiskey” is as a category? Nope, not in the least. I might have drawn some sort of conclusion after the Toki and the Mars, but the Hibiki was just too different. Maybe after trying a few dozen more examples I could tell you what this is all about, but until then I’ll just have to say these were all good whiskey. The natural followup question, is are these good enough to knock out any regulars in my current collection? The answer to that is unfortunately no. While I would never turn one of these down if offered (especially the Hibiki) there are tipple I like better at their prices (again, especially the Hibiki). I really am going to shell out for the Talisker 25 before an equally priced Nihonjin after this. But I’m glad I tried these, I can always earn more money.

September 3, 2019