Happy Friday afternoon, y’all. We picked up my father-in-law’s remains yesterday. Its not quite a coffee can, but The Big Lebowski wasn’t kidding about the cost of urns at funeral homes. Amazon is sending us a, er, more dignified storage container at a more reasonable price. Anyhow, we haven’t had any… unintended releases yet. But Florida Man is never far from us.
Florida Man continues to flirt with Hep A, causing state to declare a crisis.
Don’t blame me, I’m rooting for SMOD.
People keep holding other people’s drugs in the weirdest places.
This is rage inducing.
Comments
429 responses to “Friday Afternoon Links of Moronity”
The Big Lebowski wasn’t kidding about the cost of urns at funeral homes. Amazon is sending us a, er, more dignified storage container at a more reasonable price.
*Googles urns on Amazon*
So about $100 or less. What was the funeral home charging?
$5000.00 or 8% of the estate. Whichever is bigger.
It was double that. I hate to sound cheap, but we found something nicer for less.
Eh, no need to get hustled by people taking advantage of grief.
That’s why my sister, who is in charge of my estate, knows that they pick up the garbage on Wednesday mornings*.
* Unless there’s a Monday holiday in which case the pick it up on Thursday morning.
Enough About Palin’s service
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lv8xFI32hJM
I hopefully have a ways to go, but I have also instructed my wife to dispose of me as cheaply as possible. If only my dead body could be sold to science.
I think bodies are accepted as donations, may be a carrying charge from the funeral home, not sure. Recall that some ashes went to Canada fishing, were forgotten on a rock in a lake.
Can I have my cadaver donated directly to munitions testing?
No, don’t feel bad. The whole funeral and body disposal industry relies on guilt that you’re not making a grandiose enough public display.
And honestly, if the departed wanted a grandiose display they should have specifically set some of their own money aside for it. The pharaohs built their own pyramids, not their fathers’.
I believe that there are special circumstances in this case.
Isn’t that what GoFundMe is for?
That might have sounded a bit cold. I mean merely that unless specifically instructed otherwise, it should be assumed that a simple (and inexpensive) memorial will suffice. The most important memorial lives on in the hearts of others, not in stone, after all.
Ask the funeral director for the cheaper ones, in the back room. I told the funeral guy that my mom would have wanted the low end model because that was her personality, not flamboyant. We went in the back room, price went down from 5K to $900. That was 30 years ago but I’m guessing the same ratio holds true today.
When my mom died, I, too, went in the backroom and got the cheapest coffin. Two days later, her second husband, a truly wonderful stepfather, spoke during the service. I’ll never forget this admiring comment from him: “She always went first class.”
I never mentioned my purchasing decision, which I’m sure she would have agreed with.
That’s why I have it written in my will – get the cheapest shit possible to bury me in. The VA will provide a free headstone too, so there’s one expense eliminated.
Doesn’t sound cheap at all. My brother’s wife died suddenly a few months ago, and the funeral home hosed him on the cost of the cremation + urn. To the tune of almost four times as much as we paid for my Mom’s cremation and ashes a few years earlier.
The funeral industry’s in the business of profiting off of people’s grief, guilt and nostalgia.
Late to the conversation, but look up the Penn and Teller Bullshit episode on death.
“With 56 new cases of Hepatitis A reported statewide in the week since the last reporting period, the Florida Surgeon General declared a public health emergency on Thursday, allowing health officials to test and treat people suspected of carrying the virus.”
Breaking: Florida Man Eats Ass
Philly wants in on the cool new Hep a outbreak.
https://www.cnn.com/2019/08/02/health/philadelphia-hepatitis-a-epidemic/index.html
A lot of state prisons operate as hepatitis treatment facilities. And it’s expensive as hell.
Damn your nimble fingers. Also, I learned it from HM.
*storms out of room*
[surreptitiously smells moustache] Er, ah.
[exits room with exaggerated nonchalance]
“People keep holding other people’s drugs in the weirdest places.”
That doesn’t look like the face of someone who would lie to you?
She looks better now as a brunette. This is her 7th arrest.
She looks like she could make a lot of money letting people put other things in her body cavities.
I wS thinking she already is. She must not have been using meth all that long since she looks that good.
“Known as a near-Earth object (NEO), asteroid 2006 QQ23 will come within approximately 4.65 million miles, according to data compiled by NASA. ”
That doesn’t sound “near”.
20 lunar radii away. Not that close.
Near-Earth object? Earth is soooo narcissistic.
SPACE SMITH TAKE CARE OF ATTITUDE PROBLEM. AND BY ‘TAKE CARE OF’ MEAN…
I bet you think this orbit is about you.
I discovered an asteroid during a college internship. No shit. I would say the name but it would dox me.
Ah, Asteroid M-BG-TTS
Why one should never read these threads with anything in one’s mouth.
All you ever talk about is eating ass.
Hey, now.
Is it the one from that documentary “Armageddon”?
Titty0495-A?
You got the alpha wrong. DD
I know! I know!
Hemorrh – Roid!
Relevant: Austin Powers: Goldmember – Boob Satellite
“This is rage inducing.”
Sure but was it clearly established that this was illegal?
They got home safe damnit!!
“Nowhere in the regulations does it say not to joke about people we’re killing. Suck it, cop haters!”
/PoliceOne
I wouldn’t mind checking her body cavities.
She looks like she’s *just* on the edge of the meth doing terrible things to her body.
So, like a ripe avocado, not too hard, not too soft?
She looks pretty hard to me. Meet her at a motel, and don’t bring anything you don’t want her to steal.
anything you don’t want her to steal.-
How do I leave my heart behind?
I thought you left that in San Francisco.
Watch “Meth Storm” on HBO. The matriarch of a whole meth using family is only 43 and she looks at least 65.
I’m curious to know the long term effect of pharmaceutical grade amphetamines vs home chemistry meth.
Apply for a grant to study?
Are kidding?!? FM applied for government supplied meth, ain’t getting approved.
Asking for a friend?
I can’t imagine why people would want to do that to their bodies. The high can’t be worth the misery.
/routinely lives with awful hangovers like it’s unavoidable
“People keep holding other people’s drugs in the weirdest places.”
Lots of cops keep their drugs in other people’s cars
I keep my weed in your trunk, for example…..
Phrasing?
Don’t accidentally shoot yourself in the balls.
Deadspin Imploding?
This Is How Things Work Now At G/O Media
In conversations with Deadspin, more than 20 employees from across the business, tech, and editorial departments of G/O Media expressed frustration with Spanfeller’s approach to hiring and his new executives’ lack of knowledge about the company combined with their seeming unwillingness or inability to get up to speed. The employees, nearly all of whom requested anonymity because of fears of retaliation from company management, are angered by a lack of communication regarding company goals, seeming disregard for promoting diversity within the top ranks of the company, and by repeated and egregious interference with editorial procedures.
These conversations reveal that Spanfeller’s biggest effect on the company since taking over has been a deflation of morale. Several high-ranking employees have left the company over the past three months, departments have been stretched thin, and those who remain say that Spanfeller’s micromanaging and inappropriate interference has hamstrung their ability to effectively do their jobs.
I read Deadspin for about 15 minutes 12 years ago.
Oh no, not that.
They got bought out by a private equity shop. That doesn’t happen unless a company is underperforming. The management they brought in probably doesn’t need to learn how to run an underperforming asset.
Maybe they’ll chop it up and sell the parts, and Glibs can buy Deadspin for twenty bucks. Then just put FUCK OFF SLAVER on their homepage and let it die.
Or make it a website that just says positive things about Jerry Garcia.
Short version: He failed a 50 question multiple choice exam Agent certification exam, that is only given once a year and that you have 3 hours to take.
https://deadspin.com/pour-one-out-for-the-sad-fucker-who-flunked-his-being-z-1836916650
San Francisco International Airport Bans Single-Use Plastic Water Bottles
The new rule will apply to airport restaurants, cafes and vending machines.
So they want you to make them dual use and leave piss bottles laying around? Checks out for San Fran.
CPRM, I had a rude reply to you on last night’s thread. No insult was intended, but the subject was one that really gets to me, and I have to remind myself to cool off when discussing it.
Never apologize!!!
I apologize.
Is anything legal in San Francisco?
Street shittin’
Crossing the border? Voting without ID? Shitting on the street?
Typhus and Hep A.
Related: Who Cut the Balls Off San Francisco?
Joe Bob!
Good stuff.
A city that has outbreaks of highly contagious diseases is banning disposable bottles. Keep up the good work, San Fran.
Note to self. Don’t ever go to SF airport.
Assholes.
“As a department of San Francisco’s municipal government, the airport is following an ordinance approved in 2014 banning the sale of plastic water bottles on city-owned property.
SFO spokesman Doug Yakel says the shift away from plastics is also part of a broader plan to slash net carbon emissions and energy use to zero and eliminate most landfill waste by 2021.”
Will be interesting what the excuse or spin will be when they won’t meet their objectives.
Why, the usual: Prog Hard 2: Prog Harder
Meh. They’ll just charge you more for a “multi-use, you promise” water bottle which you will subsequently pitch into some trash or recycle bin.
Still assholic.
Travelers needing plain water will have to buy refillable aluminum or glass bottles
What could go wrong with increasing the number of glass bottles?
That TSA will confiscate when you go through security.
if It’s empty, you don’t have to give it up at the security checkpoint.
Yet. I’m sure they’ll never classify a glass bottle as a potential weapon . . .
Once my wife and I were upgraded to first class and were handed long stemmed champagne glasses.
One click on the seat frame and you have a 4 or 5 inch glass spike.
At least I didn’t have any fingernail Clippers on me though.
They hand you aluminum soda cans in coach, which can be torn into a fairly sharp shape in about 10 seconds.
You can carry knitting needles onto a plane. And in most airports you can buy a six pack of beer or bottles of wine after the security checkpoint to carry onto the plane.
Why are you helping the terrorist?
People who make decisions like this won’t be inconvenienced in the slightest. They can always get as much water as they want (and other drinks) at the airport lounges. For example, American Express has its Centurion lounge in SFO. It’s always other people who will have to bear the burden.
The Skyclub lounge at SFO is outside of security (or was, last time I was there). Weird setup where I couldn’t get bombed and run directly to my gate.
Same on the plane. Ring the call button and the FA will serve you immediately upfront. Silly proles wanting to have a convenient low weight bottle that they stick in the seat back and use whenever they want.
Trump: “A$AP Rocky released from prison and on his way home to the United States from Sweden. It was a Rocky Week, get home ASAP A$AP!”
Fuck you, world. Only WE are allowed to arrest our rappers
Did Trump have anything to do with it?
I’m going to be disappointed if Trump didn’t send Dennis Rodman to broker the deal.
Or Diamond & Silk.
Not Diamond and Zap?
I have a vague memory that Zap posed nude for Playboy.
Or Diamonds and Rust?
Diamonds and Pearls.
“NEW: Jeffrey Epstein told scientists that he wanted to seed the human race with his DNA by impregnating women (20 at a time) at his vast New Mexico ranch.
He also said he wanted his penis frozen.”
https://twitter.com/yashar/status/1156647117768790018
The word is that he was into eugenics. I’m curious if the rich and powerful people he hung out with were into it too. It would explain a few things.
You know who else was into eugenics?
Margaret Sanger?
FDR?
Aldous Huxley?
Sweden up until the 1970s?
Malignancy?
Link…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eJmnttcpK00
People named “Eugene”?
Or people who are into people named Eugene, I suppose
/strokes chin
Paul Brandon Barringer.
The Vikings?
I listened to a podcast the other way that positied that Jeffery Epstein is a Mossad agent, which would explain the Saudi passport and political cover. Theory is his job was to get dirt on all the ruling class by facilitating and recording their depraved sexual escapades with minors. IDK…..interesting theory, don’t know if I give it much credence.
I think the guy’s a sociopath who got in with the right crowd.
Thats not uncommon in that set I suspect.
so nice to see when someone disdains the fashionable PUTTINN!! and goes back to the classics!
““This is one of the closest approaches to Earth by an asteroid that we know of. And it’s a pretty large one,” Michael Brown, an associate professor at Monash University’s school of physics and astronomy”
Wow! Michael Brown certainly has turned his death around!
Our Top Leaders are getting to the important things. No more drive-thrus for you fucks in Minneapolis.
That makes me think of the 27 speed bumps I have to drive over at my work facility. They weren’t there a year ago but low and behold, they showed up one day. Pedestrians had never had any close calls that I know of and they amount of traffic had been greatly reduced from when I first got there but somebody had a great solution to a problem nobody else knew we had.
I seem to recall that some of the deaths in the last CA wildfires were due to traffic getting snarled thanks to “traffic calming” measures that were applied to evacuation routes.
That unpossible, nothing the government does for our own good ever has unintended consequences.
I guess the handicapped and elderly people for whom drive-thrus are a big improvement in their quality of life can go fuck themselves.
“Oh we have a plan for that, the governemtn will pay for their Doordash subsciptions” /proggie interventionism
Elderly people, yes, since they vote Republican. Obamacare will take care of the cripples by giving them electric wheelchairs with doors and ragtops that you can drive right into the Starbucks. (I’ve seen one in my suburban neighborhood a couple weeks ago.)
[Lisa] Bender, who also sits on the committee, said the city was already working to make commercial corridors less car-oriented.
So they want to push people to the suburbs?
All those pedestrians and bikers will get along fine when it’s -20 with drifting snow.
This is also a good point. I can’t imagine trying to walk anywhere in the winters they get. The whole idea of making it a pedestrian/bicycle town is stupid.
“[Lisa] Bender”
I pictured a drunk, cigar-smoking robot with Lisa Simpson’s voice.
Lisa Bender doesn’t look quite human. Not Mr. Lizard’s best work.
Lisa Goodman (the other do-gooder in the story) does look exactly like you think she would.
I love Lisa Bender’s plan to dismantle historic and structural racism by raising the minimum wage, which was introduced by white supremacists as a means of preventing minorities from competing with white workers.
Yes, Lisa! Expanding a Jim Crow law is exactly the way to dismantle structural racism! You go girl!
The thing that really pisses me off about these fucks “working to make commercial corridors less car-oriented” is that apparently they and their supporters never have to work or go anywhere, they just spend their days as pedestrians hanging out in commercial areas, with no time constraints. Every day must be “a fun afternoon shopping” where they can sit down and order a leisurely lunch, then walk around and window-shop afterwards. Everybody else who has only ten minutes to grab lunch and eat it in the car on the way to their next appointment/meeting/errand can just go to hell, I guess, nobodies and peons that they are.
And because of their silencing ability towards local merchants (“say anything against this and the health department will soon pay you a visit”) none of them will say what they really feel, which undoubtedly would be “hey, I’d like to keep the majority of our business and revenue, what the hell are you thinking?!”
Also, thanks TOK for pointing out the handicap issue — being handicapped myself, if I didn’t have car access, I would either have to spend most of my time at home or move to an apartment building within all these commercial areas, and I am doing OK as things are now, unless we ‘ban cars’ and I’m screwed.
Final point. These politicians hate cars for what they say are environmental or safety reason, but deep down, they really hate them because they represent individual freedom.
“I rarely have seen anyone other than the applicants of drive-throughs come to speak in favor of them.”
The people who use them are speaking with their actions, lady.
^This.
IOW, the only people who show up at those meetings are NIMBYs. Normal people don’t have the time to show up at government meetings to tell government to leave well enough alone.
If the meetings had drive-up windows more people would show up.
The cynic in me wonders if this woman or her extended family doesn’t own a bunch of drive-thrus. “Hmm… how could we instantly increase the value of out drive-thrus?”
Total virtue signalling. I mean, where in the hell in Minneapolis could they even build a new restaurant that would have drive-up windows? There’s no space let to build on.
Minneapolis is the place that won’t even let you tear down an old White Castle Minneapolis put the status of Historic Structure on an old White Castle so that:
So White Castle will never be the home of a Glib meetup
No problem.
Those aren’t hamburgers.
I have a soft spot for them because when we’d visit my gramma in the summers she’d take my cousins and I to White Castle with a coupon for 12 burgers for $1 (normally it was 10/$1).
A big city treat for a rube kid from the Western Prairie.
I used to eat them when I was a kid, too. But they are really fucking bad.
No “lightning” in Minneapolis?
I bet when they first proposed it for only a couple zoning districts, they scoffed at any nut who said “slippery slope”.
+1 seat belt law
+1 hands-free only cellphone law
+1 no-smoking section in restaurants
No smoking in a dive bar, like anyone is there for health reasons.
Banning the sale of a legal product that contains no tobacco and which has helped millions quit cigarettes, because it “looks like smoking”.
Friday Funbags brings the bouncy meaning of existence to you.
http://archive.is/SDgNE
#60 – Compound bow. Sad.
*insert whisker biscuit joke*
Greetings from the (for now) sunny North Shore of Oahu. After flying in from Lana’i yesterday morning, I took dbleagle’s recommendation and lunched at the La Mariana Sailing Club, perhaps the last of the “old school” tiki bars on Oahu. Even got Mrs. Shpip involved.
Today we explore Laie Point and have a bite to eat. Any Hawai’ian Glibs want to offer any pointers, feel free.
Well Romy’s shrimp shack is nearby. That is always on my wife’s to-go list when we visit Hawaii. I’m not much of a sea food maniac, so I am not that thrilled by it, but she would tear your arm off if you got too close to her food.
The Hawaii Pot Shabu Shabu House restaurant is on the opposite end of the island, but we liked it a lot. My favorite is that you can bring your own beer in and drink it while eating shabu shabu.
*All advice is from a dumb Minnesoda tourist who has visited the island a few times so don’t be surprised if natives sneer at my recommendations.
I liked Buzz’s Original Steak House when I was there last. Bonus points: it was apparently one of Obama’s favourite eating spots. Mebbe you could catch a glimpse of His Dreaminess himself!
If you go to the Buzz’s in Lanikai you will be only a few miles from my shit shack. Let me know. Buzz’s food is meh but the drinks are very strong and some good desserts.
I hope you both are enjoying your time out here.
Nico’s has good seafood at both locations. Tamura’s has great poke and very competitively priced beer, wine and alchohol.
“Gabbard is taking her battle with Harris not only to Fox News, but on the racist, sexist, xenophobic bigot Tucker Carlson’s show. Carlson even cut out from Trump’s Ohio rally to allow Gabbard to trash Harris. Something is not right with this campaign in so many ways.
Striking the number of bots this post has attracted: most of which were created in the months leading up to the 2016 election or in recent months. Yep, this has the stench of Russia again. Be sure to report the accounts before blocking them. Clean up the mess!
Yes happening in broad daylight. Russia is propelling her.
Something up. This stinks of Russia which is basically the same as Trump’s GOP so easy to get them confused.”
https://twitter.com/Amy_Siskind/status/1157091364762476546
RUSSIA!!!
Wow, the left will turn on her hard now, She challenged their anointed and now she is well on her way to being unpersoned. I know we’ve already beat this to death but she’s won my begrudging respect for having shown some principles even if they are many shades off of mine.
Holy shit that is a lot of people off their meds.
“We know the playbook people!
Eyes and ears open, if it doesn’t smell right there is a reason.”
It was those dirty Russians again, just like with Trump. Don’t believe your lying eyes and ears, he’s still Putin’s puppet!11!!!
As has been said before……this has become a religion. Anyone wanna name their church?
“Marla Hooch
@MarlaHooch1
20h20 hours ago
More
Replying to @Amy_Siskind
I can’t decide whether Tulsi Gabbard is Republican or a Russian agent, but then again both seems pretty common lately.”
Fucken kee-rist.
I think those comments are probably worse than the Democratic Underground.
I’m not sure what I’m looking at.
She may want to consider joining the Republicans. She can teach them not to warboner and they can teach her economics*.
*To a limited extent…
Totally not crazy.
QAnon lunatics of the Left.
Mentions bots, without evidence.
Anyone who disagrees with me is a Russian bot (ie. I don’t know a single person who voted for Nixon)
/TwatterProg
Anyone who doesn’t disagree is a smart Russian bot!
Teh evidence is right there in front of you!!!!11!!!
Something is not right with this campaign in so many ways.
Perhaps when you try to silence someone, they will go where their voice can still be heard.
Tulsi can’t be a Russian stooge. She doesn’t eat hamburgers.
Assertion: Obama ate hamburgers too!
Poltifact: False. Obama are cheeseburgers.
ate.
The GOP NeverTrump crew is babbling the same kind of shit, merely reinforcing the perception of the uniparty.
More progjection. They’re not capable of independent thought so neither is anyone else.
Sorry about your father-in-law.
Dix alleged that while he was showering, Rolland took his cash and left the residence. The affidavit identifies Dix as Rolland’s boyfriend.
How does that saying go? “Never stick it in….”? Fuck, I can’t remember.
The footage shows Timpa, his face down in the grass, falling unconscious. The officers can be heard making jokes about Timpa falling asleep and about waking him up for school. One officer appears to mimic a teenager, saying: “I don’t want to go to school! Five more minutes, Mom!”
What assholes.
From the sidebar of the who cut San Fran’s balls off:
https://www.takimag.com/article/i-knew-a-guy-who-was-lgbtqrstuvwxyz/
Interesting to read some kind words of wisdom from Joe Bob Briggs on the topic.
https://twitter.com/stillgray/status/1157356456703692800
que?
Well, her Twitter name is @psychwardslut.
Uffda. This reporter needs to ask some better questions.
Minneapolis built a “natural” pool. Instead of chlorine it uses natural filters to keep the water clean. Unfortunately it hasn’t gone well. The first two years it was open, it had to close for half the days because of water quality issues due to “wildlife leaving behind high levels of bacteria.”
But this puff piece is crowing about how a new UV filter is working so great that they have been open every day this year.
I wish the reporter had asked the Parks Board flack “So how much more has this natural filter shit cost? How much more is that than just dosing it with chlorine? You guys operate a ton of other pools in the city that use chlorine, so how many kids are those pools killing?”
Goodness, you are so fussy. Here the Parks Board goes over its budget, oops, taxpayer funded money and all you can do is bitch about is money. Kids are far more important than a few thousand bucks in maintenance costs. You probably think swim pools should be private, like at motels or something.
“Trump-Hating Washington Post Writes Weirdest Story Ever, Tying Trump To Russia And … Hamburgers?
“Even one of Trump’s favorite foods has a hidden Russia connection.”
Months after the final report by special counsel Robert Mueller failed to tie Trump or his campaign to an effort by Russia to influence the 2016 presidential election, The Post is still prattling on about it.
Here’s the paper’s thinking, apparently: Trump likes burgers; Russia likes burgers; Trump enlisted Russia to alter the election’s outcome. We don’t know for sure, but that’s all we can guess.
Here’s the second paragraph of the piece: “But peel back the oil-spattered pages of history, and you’ll find that the sandwich so closely aligned with the stars and stripes was once also embraced by the hammer and sickle. (Yep, like so much about this current administration, even Trump’s beloved hamburgers have surprising ties to Russia.) In the 1930s, when McDonald’s was just a greasy twinkle in Ray Kroc’s eye — he didn’t open his first McDonald’s until 1955 — the Soviet Union was a couple of decades out from its revolution and in the midst of industrialization and urbanization on a staggering scale. Tens of millions left the countryside for the cities, as feudal farmers transformed into urban Soviet workers. And these workers needed to be fed.””
https://www.thegatewaypundit.com/2019/08/trump-hating-washington-post-writes-weirdest-story-ever-tying-trump-to-russia-and-hamburgers/
App of thorazine stat!
Nobody can be that fuckin’ stupid. We’ve got to be getting trolled
“The Post article describes the Soviet Union-era burgers as “rounder with tapered ends, like footballs” and served “sans bun,” which makes them remarkably different than the version regularly enjoyed by Americans – meaning one of Trump’s “favorite foods” doesn’t even have the Russians ties the author claims.”
https://www.foxnews.com/media/washington-post-ties-trump-russians-over-shared-love-of-hamburgers
Are they actively trying to destroy their own credibility?
Their what?
Green new deal. Abortions for trannies. Govt by psychic healing crystals.
Need I say more?
Unfortunately the people who vote for them either don’t understand what credibility is or don’t care.
While there were some sort of fast-food dishes in the Soviet Union, hamburgers were not among them. When the first McDonalds opened in Moscow in 1990, people were waiting in line to get inside for more than an hour. Yet nobody was claiming that the Big Mac was just a kotleta v bulochke available in a stolovaya but with more tomatoes and lettuce.
So Kibi. Not a sandwich. Not a hamburger.
“rounder with tapered ends, like footballs” and served “sans bun,”
IOW not a hamburger.
This is ridiculous.
Hamburgers are of German origin. Trump’s fondness for burgers clearly makes him a Nazi, not a Russian stooge. Get it right, people.
Hamburgers are of German origin.
Um, yeah, they’re named after a German city, right?
Dusseldorf?
No, that’s the town responsible for Dorf on Golf.
R.I.P. Tim Conway.
“And these workers needed to be fed”
Yes , yes they did.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Droughts_and_famines_in_Russia_and_the_Soviet_Union
Obligatory
“In the 1930s, when McDonald’s was just a greasy twinkle in Ray Kroc’s eye — he didn’t open his first McDonald’s until 1955 — the Soviet Union was a couple of decades out from its revolution and in the midst of industrialization and urbanization on a staggering scale. Tens of millions left the countryside for the cities,”
Some millions more were left dead and starving in Ukraine because they didn’t cooperate with the farm collectivization. But ignore that for your pithy story about hamburgers.
This is actually the company that Ray Kroc started:
https://www.princecastle.com/
I look forward to Snopes calling this “mostly true”.
This may be dumber than the Russian salad dressing made in VT thing (or w/e that “story” was.)
I’m going to assume this was an attempt at humor.
A question for the more math-ly inclined amongst the Glibs.
This story goes on and on about how few kids live in the city of Minneapolis. And it points out that the number has been dropping for years.
Now, look at this story that has a handy chart showing the school budget going up every year. Sadly the story is also about how even with more money coming in, the school still runs a deficit.
So the challenge for you is to tell me how a standard progressive makes the math work on these two stories. Number of kids goes down, but the money goes up? Oh, and the answer is not that the money now being focused on fewer students means way higher test scores.
“So the challenge for you is to tell me how a standard progressive makes the math work on these two stories”
It’s a delicate combination of NEED MOAR MUNNY and FYTW.
More administrators and non-teaching personnel — WAY more.
I should say that colleges have the same issue. The increasing number of regulations exacerbates this since more people are needed to make sure the regs are being followed.
Easy. Kids are getting 3 gourmet meals a day to include week ends. You see, this extra service is to prepare young people to be able to go out in the world, totally prepared to move into high paying barista positions. Its an investment in our future.
Those fewer students are more disadvantaged/diverse/needy than ever. Give us more money.
If the teachers unions were throwing me some of that sweet, sweet lobbying lucre, I’d frame it something like this:
“I know it sounds bad. But, you’re only looking at the top level. Education isn’t a variable cost business. It’s costs are mostly fixed. You can’t save all that much by closing down half a school. And it’s not like you can put kids on a two hour bus ride to get them to some different school because you’ve decided to consolidate. And while you can make some staffing cuts, there’s not as many as you’d like to think. You still need teachers for each grade and each subject.
At the same time, what we expect from our schools has exploded….”
Damn it, now I want hamburgers.
I always want hamburgers. Right now, a jalepeno and cheddar pub burger would do the trick.
Oh man…now I’m hungry.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h9JD6W1PU-s
and this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q84nfWkLsYU
LOL!!
You’re missing bacon.
Their are no swine evil enough.
Ooh, I have fresh picked jalapenos. But, I’m making BLTs tonight with fresh picked tomatoes.
I want one of those bad.
Homemade tomatoes with Prajchecks Smokehouse thick sliced cured bacon.
And a big ole slice of fresh 1015 sweet onion.
Food porno baby. I’m getting chubby just fantasizing.
All American Thickburger.
WOULD
They should call it the “Demi”.
All you need do is ask.
Smokhouse Burgers | Hickory Smoked Hamburgers
Hey Brett!
I still wouldn’t mind the Folgers can. And maybe Jimbo and Leap can recreate the best ashes scattering scene of all time.
“Good night, sweet prince.”
Only if you are in the can buddy.
They’d throw the ashes off the bridge at Gooseberry Falls and head for Betty’s Pies. Because they knew the coffee was fresh and it came with pie (lower case)
Still funny
another fabulous Trump nominee runs for the hills
The lawmaker was facing intense questions about padding his résumé and a lack of experience, which led to a lukewarm reception on Capitol Hill. . .
But inside the White House, at least some believed that while Ratcliffe would likely have faced an contentious nomination fight, Senate Republicans were ultimately unlikely to vote against a Trump nominee. Ratcliffe might have survived, and may have withdrawn too early, in the view of some.
Some current and former intelligence officials have said Ratcliffe is the least-qualified person ever nominated to oversee the country’s intelligence agencies — previous directors have been former diplomats, senior intelligence officials and military leaders and uniformly Top.Men. fuckups who have failed in their oaths and duties.
Spam voicemail I just got:
“This is to inform you that your Social Security number has been suspended due to some reasons. Please call us at XXX-XXXX. Thank you and have a nice day.”
They aren’t even trying anymore.
I’d celebrate that.
I laughed
Me too, since I have 30-40 years left on the pay into it side of things. But the funniest part to me was the “due to some reasons”. Who would fall for something that vague?
My mother in law
Supposedly these things are deliberately designed to be obvious scams to most people. They only want the real dumb/gullible ones replying.
Interesting. There’s a certain sinister logic to it, so I guess that makes sense.
My favorite are the robocall voicemails left in Chinese. Is it the “IRS”? Is it selling me an exciting opportunity in real estate? Is Windows “broken”? WHO KNOWS? Not me!
From what I understand they’re designed to scare the shit out of Chinese people by saying they’re under investigation by the Chinese government. They target normal people with money, and it shouldn’t work, except that this sort of threat from their actual government is so real that they are scared shitless, and go along.
I get those voicemails in Chinese all the time too. Do yours also have the happy music playing in a loop in the background?
I totally wonder what she’s saying as well.
I got that this morning on my cellphone, too. My Canadian cellphone. They’re taking “not even trying” to whole new levels of lazy.
loyal American decides to MAGA on the side of protester’s head right in front of cops
Throwing punches with a dozen cops standing right there seems less than smart somehow.
Especially when you can’t drop your 100 year old opponent. I think it is a false flag operation!
Meh, blue shirt is probably late fifties tops. I bet he could have taken him if the refs hadn’t stopped the fight early.
It did say he was from Kentucky.
Green shirt either has some training or watches a lot of Rocky movies, but damn, blue shirt can take a punch. Green shirt landed what looked like two or three solid shots and blue shirt was all ‘Just let me pick up me glasses here, no biggie didn’t hurt at all.”
This green shirt / blue shirt violence needs to stop. Why can’t we all wear teal and get along?
Look, the Green/Blue rivalry dates back to the days of Byzantium. A push for Teal or Turquiose will only get you hurt.
sounds like a job for Jared
how would an imprisoned restaurant spokesman help?
Earlier than that.
They aren’t sending us their best.
Mueller is a little bitch compared to a real investigator
I was certain that second link would be to Columbo.
Fuck the ADA, I don’t want the blind guy bagging my groceries. His efforts are worse than no one bagging.
If they made a nice radar that read the groceries and beeped and prodded, it could help your buddy sack your groceries.
And for $0.09 more that could go ahead and program that robot to just fucking go ahead and bag the groceries itself.
Some fun stuff over at my car pr0n place today.
First off, a lovely 1991 Honda CRX Si made some jaws drop. (Mine included)
Also, that gorgeous 1953 Jag XK120 that we admired the other day looks like a goddamn bargain!
I had a CRX back in the day. Almost a perfect car, but still, that seems like a lot of coin. The Jag should be on a transport bound for Minne.
$33K for a 1991 Honda?! Zillionaire with a nostalgia trip, or is the economy really kicking that much ass?
Why not buy a low mileage simple car? The average transaction price of a new car is more than that and the fucking thing is pretty much disposable.
Eric Peters had a good article the other day that I enjoyed a lot: Why You Can’t Afford to Not Buy a Classic Car!
It’s an interesting take.
I’m down with older vehicles, but if I’m going to drop $33K on one it better be something more fantastic and less pedestrian. I have a 2007 Toyota FJ, a 2006 Toyota 4Runner, and a 1999 Mercedes ML430, and like driving them precisely because they aren’t larded up with a bunch of tech-heavy bullshit. I also have a 1975 Mercedes diesel, which is a little less reliable than my newer vehicles.
It’s a good article.
Though I will admit, every now and then I get a hankering to get a new 2019 Mustang as a fun car. I’ve managed to not give in so far.
I know what you want.
A nice one went for $12K today on BaT.
This one?
I had kicked around the idea of having both a new Mustang and a TR-6 as fun cars.
That one.
Both, of course, is the right answer!
Huh, it only doubled. I was wrong.
total pain to be a grown-ass Republican these days
Of course, playing good cop bad cop with him back in the day had its advantages
I hope she isn’t operating under the illusion that this will save her from the massive abuse she’ll have coming, if she runs for President or VP someday.
fuck ’em
what choice do the deplorables have: vote Democrat? throw your vote away?
Oh my Lord. Babylon Bee has outdone itself.
https://babylonbee.com/news/lgtq-publicly-executes-b-for-suggesting-there-are-only-two-genders
Larf:)
Well its official, told my boss today. Moving soon, very likely back to the inland NW. Do we have any Eastern Washington/Northern Idaho Glibs around?
Congrats?
I’m exercising an option I’ve always kinda had but I’ve had it with my job, had it with WV and just ended my relationship that many Glibs told me I was dumb to get into (I did it anyway). Iran out of reasons to stay and have every reason to leave.
WV, like my native MS, has a better list of folks who left than folks who stayed.
/ starts singing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WS3Lkc6Gzlk to self
Yep. I’ve met some great people here but on the whole WV sadly lives up to it’s reputation. I knew early on that this was not a long-term home for me.
Then congrats.
ditto
My in-laws met at WSU. Nice folks up there: good luck !
Going Unabomber on us?
Going?
Sorry man, I wasn’t sure and didn’t want to assume.
*Nods, goes back to typing 5000 page manifesto, edition 6
Typing? Pfft…handwritten with intricate margin doodles or GTFO.
*Adds Hyperbole to hand-written list, with doodles*
I subscribed to his manifesto updates years ago
Congrats, Bob!
Nice work.
Thanks! I’m getting genuinely excited
Change and challenge keeps you alive, dude.
more time for whiskey and guitars
Definitely does for me, I need a change of venue every 4-5 years to stay, er,…..sane?
Huzzah for Bob’s new beginnings!!
::trips merrily down the lane, Barefoot in a white cotton peasant dress, sprinkling rose petals and singing for Bob::
This peasant dress – is it low cut?
*waggles eyebrows*
Yeah actually it is. I can snap a pic later if I give a sufficient fuck.
Sweet!
How you feelin’?
A little better every day! Gonna go back to work Monday, see how it goes.
Glad you are feeling better, sorry it means back to work!
A little better every day! Gonna go back to work Monday, see how it goes.
Excellent news!
Pssst… Tundra – she blow stuff up. For a living. If you’re got a job that cool, going back to work isn’t a chore.
Seriously, though, good to hear Hi-X, and congrats to Bob B.
Glad to hear you’re feeling better
Peasant dress pic from 5 min ago.
Yeah, I’m drunk.
https://i.imgur.com/zXVyFVT.jpg
Stop it. Q will get jealous!
Peasant dress pic from 5 min ago.
Excellent!
*doffs hat and performs conspicuously low bow; falls ass over teapot into muddy lane
Not a shady lane?
A Shakey Graveis more my style.
That was simply awful
Nah, it’s Pavement. Can be an acquired taste…
Thanks, Bob! That was fun. The chick is awesome.
She definitely has some kind of ‘cute as a button singer’ thing going on
As long as I’m linking music; this song sums up every relationship I’ve ever had:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-EN7qQcHyDo
Congrats!
I’m up in North Idaho.
I think Slammer is coming to the area as well.
Good choice of area! Coeur d’Alene is a spot we’d be delighted to live in for the rest of our lives if we could.
You looking in the area again or will your new business concern tie you down?
Congratulations! I hope the move goes smoothly for you.
Someday….
Good luck and congrats!
Congrats! I’m in SW Idaho but I do know a number of natives who’ve bailed out of the valley were headed towards Orofino. Winters aren’t as bad as surrounding areas.
Yay, the Japanese diesel fuel injection pump that costs $1100 in the states just arrived from Germany for $400.
I hate the EPA.
The Germans are killing nuclear, but not diesel?
The US is there one killing diesel
the
Detroit Debate Round Two
“As these startlingly different maps suggest, there’s a concerted far-right effort (possibly involving foreign actors) to bolster Tulsi Gabbard. I’m not blaming Gabbard for this—and I don’t think anyone should—but we also have to be honest about what’s happening.”
https://twitter.com/SethAbramson/status/1156770833458708480
These are the people who think Alex Jones is too crazy to have a platform.
“NONONONONONONONONO!!!!!1!!
If one of our candidates is doing well, it must be a far-Right conspiracy, it’s the only explanation! We should go for anyone but her.
Such a winning strategy!”
Lol
Far right conspiracy? I thought they were all pissed because Tulsi said Trump is allegedly supporting ISIS terrorism in Yemen?
https://twitter.com/CassandraRules/status/1156776344203739136
LOLOLOLOL
That’s hilarious.
Upon seeing this, if you didn’t immediately make it your desktop wallpaper, you’re worse than a pedophile:
Please tell me this is actually from her campaign
The HS photo album treatment is a nice touch.
Biden is so old he uses the word “malarkey”.
What a ninnyhammer!
Okay. Question for cooking Glibs.
Does anyone have a method for making the gravy in a freshly baked pot pie not come out of the oven watery? I know it tends to get less viscous as it heats up, but the ones I’ve made have been close to soup until refrigerated.
Corn starch?
Make a roux using flour
^^^^
Or you can make a bechamel sauce with flour and milk.
No you cant.
Opps, I didn’t see that you were responding to ‘Make a roux with…” I blame Trashy and eyepiece. not my fault and not an apology.
Muahahahaha
Are you going to apologize to Ted for you’re horrific lack of punctuation?
Okay. That’s a fail.
Look, I think it’s obvious that we all need to apologize to each other, we can form a, I don’t know, circle? then reach out to the Glib next to us and ‘apologize’ then shift one spot over and apologize again and again til everyone is satisfied.
Euphemism alert.
*stands to Hyperbole’s right*
Gonna need a lot more info, as in “How are you making it now” for a start. I saute my veggies add cooked meats and then flour , add stock till I get the consistency I want then I fill the pot pie ( or more often just put it in crock and top with biscuit dough). bake til crust is brown , let cool til it wont burn my palate and serve.
Yes, without more info I would say more flour or blonder roux
The current recipe is: Take whatever random leftover veggies I have (some mix of potato, carrot, corn, peas, lima beans) , which were cooked for whatever original meal they were from, throw them in a bowl. Cook the meat, either pork or chicken. Cut meat and toss in bowl. Make gravy, pour in bowl, mix. Spoon into little pie pans, top with pie dough. Bake until crust is cooked.
More flour or blonder roux for gravy.
I’ll have to adjust that when I have more leftover veggies to make delicious.
If you’re just putting a crust on the top, follow the suggestions and simmer to the consistency you want before putting in tins. You will probably need to adjust seasoning, depending on your tastes.
Same trick as with other pies where the filling can potentially release a lot of liquid — mix some starch (usually just wheat flour) into the “raw” filling and the fill and bake the pie.Requires some experimentation, and I’m sure you can Google/Bing/DuckDuckGo suggested amounts of said starch.
So that project I struggled and struggled with, that I’m delivering the paper nearly a year late, yeah that one. Well, the client wants me to publish the paper and I got an email from my think tank’s president saying he wants to take it to the National Academy of Sciences as an example of how to think through a particular issue. Pretty good for a hail Mary analysis that I describe as, “well, I don’t have to look at my shoes while I explain what I did”.
That’s really cool, Tulip! Am I gonna be able to tell people “Yeah, I knew her before she won the Nobel Prize. Real down to earth chick.”
Congrats!
And I’ll get paid $$$ for an expose about how I used to send her boxes of gin.
?
Way to go, Tulip!
When in doubt, just tie it into
global warmingclimate change. Bing, bang, boom – published and lavishly praised.I still hate the paper, but I’m too close to it. And, I’ll find a decent journal for it – I’m good at that. I publish pretty regularly. I’m more excited that the think tank president likes it because I respect his opinion
It’s really hard to judge your own stuff. I’ve worked hard on things I thought were great, or even just good – that landed with a thud, and cobbled together things I thought were shaky that received positive feedback.
It seems like a good day for Glibs, though. Bob, HayekX, and you have good things on the horizon. Congrats!
Suweetah!
Nice.
Remember, you’ve seen inside your particular sausage factory, but they haven’t. Impostor syndrome and all that.
Congrats Tulip.
Since I clearly missed the supreme court summary – great writeup trshmnstr – would love to see those every season. Am I the only one who thinks that the Round-up Cancer suit will be reversed/thrown out on appeal? The tenuous (at best) reasoning for finding it caused cancer in a single individual (and apparently no way to prove it as the sole cause) seems like absolute trash.
Similarly…enjoying the National Review’s ongoing updates on their lawsuit related to the Chevron class action shakedown BS – even more so when KDW writes the updates. https://www.nationalreview.com/corner/steven-donziger-facing-prosecution-in-chevron-saga/
Am I the only one who thinks that the Round-up Cancer suit will be reversed/thrown out on appeal?
I think it will be thrown out too.
I still use Round-up. It’s good stuff.
Yazoo’s Sly Rye Porter is really good.
I’m drinking Village Blacksmith Alberta Black Ale (scroll down) at the nonce. It’s very interesting, but I’m missing the Big Rock Black Amber Porter of my younger days (they no longer make it, the Fargin’ Bastages).
Tomorrow, the remediation company comes and starts ripping out the water-wrecked portions of my brand-new (to me) duplex. I haz a sad. More alcohol, please . . .
That sounds like a good beer. Best wishes on the repairs to your place.
Thanks!
Need. More. Booze.
I’ve got a fridge and cabinet full of stuff from my last road trip.
Online dating dispatch: what is up with these guys using 10 year-old photos? Do they really think we can’t tell? I’m not clicking on someone who is lying from the start. This is worse than the height thing.
That’s so lame.
Here’s a selfie I just took.
Here’s mine.
Hawt.
Well, that’s definitely 160 pounds of polyester.
Huh. More refined looking than I would have guessed.
Thanks, all. Not just any guy could rock that style.
You and disco-version Mike Brady.
Here is what I look look right now
That’s not funny!
Are you wearing a merkin on your chest?
Russian conspiracy CONFIRMED! ”I must crush you (between my rock-hard thighs).”
Full penetration.
Thanks gentlemen. I laughed
Because that’s my most recent photograph?
Don’t point cameras at me, I get mad.
Some people just like shooting themselves in the foot.
It’s like women who post only filtered pictures of themselves or only pictures taken from above.
Why would a guy do that? I hear ladies like a more mature gentleman.
This is 10 years old, but I re-read it last night, and it’s still one of the funniest things I’ve ever read on a blog.
The first time I read that I had tears streaming down my face I was laughing so hard.
..aaand it happened again.
27B/6 was one of the first things I ever sent to my normally-stalwart super genius friend that caused him to laugh so hard he damn near peed himself.
I was proud.
I love how it builds and builds. Also this exchange:
“S: Thats not my cat. where did you get that picture from? That cat is orange. I gave you a photo of my cat.
D: I know, but that one is cute…” Had me near where your friend was.
MikeS – the first time I read it, I got to that point where you’re laughing so hard you can’t breathe.
Orangecatbad
Nice. Missed it 10 years ago!
It’s eternal, like the City of Lights. ;-)
OMFG I’ve tears all over my keyboard. How have i not seen this before?
I will,however, not be showing this to my wife. Her sense of humor wrt cats (other than their adorableness ) is non existent.
I sent it on to my friends, including the cat ladies. I may have fewer friends now. It was funny and my eyes are sill wet from the laughing
“How Feminism Paved the Way for Transgenderism”
https://quillette.com/2019/08/01/how-feminism-paved-the-way-for-transgenderism/
I find this somewhat interesting purely from a political perspective, but it ignores neuroscience.
“BREAKING: Arlington PD has just released the body camera of the moments an officer fatally shot a woman while aiming at a loose dog.”
https://twitter.com/FOX4/status/1157409690818494465
http://www.fox4news.com/news/arlington-fire-captains-daughter-fatally-shot-by-officer-aiming-at-loose-dog
FFS. Rookie panics, woman dies.
So, I’m not real sure why he was there. She was passed out with her dog and the dog tried to protect its owner and the cop shot her? Is that right?
Welfare check on a woman down. Unknown who owned the dog.
So, I don’t like it if they don’t use their first name, and use something like theone or stophere. But I just saw Mr. Discipline. I guess he’s advertising for what he wants (not me). Shudders.
I don’t use my first name.
(Seriously, I’m one of those weirdos who goes by his middle name.)
That’s different from using something like stophere
So, I’m guessing your first name is Sue?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YJ3tFPTUhAE
#metoo but it wasn’t my choice
Ok, so aside from bars and online dating, what are the options? Have you ever done one of those “It’s Just Lunch” things?
Maybe if you went to local Libertarian party events??!
Maybe if you went to local Libertarian party events??!
Maybe she doesn’t want to live chained in a basement. Had you thought of that, Ms. Splosives?
I’ve done speed dating and I also go to meet ups for things I’m interested in. I haven’t found someone, so I’m trying this for a while.
I’m generally pretending to be an anthropologist. It lets me not take things personally
Awesome way of putting it.
I assume you are talking about online dating? I gave up on that a while ago. Rare I found anyone who wasn’t a hard “no” before you ever go around to exchanging numbers. The few I did meet in meatspace ranged from desperate to insane to downright evil. I finally just quit. A couple of my buddies did meet their wives that way, however. Best of luck! I’m sure there is an ocean of douchebags on those websites.
I’ve met some nice men who just aren’t for me. And, as you noted an ocean of douche bags. I haven’t met them in person except one. I left after half an hour.
I wish I had some good advice for you but I’m about the last person who should be advising anyone on matters related to love. All I know is it’s weird meeting perfect strangers in that context. I always tell my friends that if they want to set me up the best possible thing they can do is arrange a social event and don’t tell me it’s happening, its so much easier to talk to someone when there isn’t some forced expectation.
Exactly. When there is no pressure or expectation things seem to flow smoother.
I tried online dating around 2000 after a breakup.
I meet several women my age at the time.
Each and every one was bitter and burnt out.
They all seemed to hate and distrust men.
The last I met in a restaurant. Within 10 minutes she was bitching and complaining about her ex and all their problems which were all his fault.
Before I finished my first cocktail I stood up and put a 30 on the table.
I said.
I came here tonight hoping to have a good time and meet someone. Not to listen to you complain and cut down men…ehich in case you haven’t noticed I am one.
I left
It was only the most stand out example of my online dating experience with women my own age in their 50s.
You told this story on an earlier evening.
It must have been a long time ago or I had much beer.
I’m surprised you, or anyone remembers.
If you haven’t given them a chance in real life how do you know they aren’t for you.
If my wife and I graded each other tomorrow online we would not probably want to meet.
We have a strong and loving bond in spite of or superficial likes and dislike.
Our bond is built on levels much deeper than age, who likes what music, and who we would vote for.
On-line dating is a wasteland.
I keep trying it, but on the other hand, I never claimed to be smart.
I’d try too but between my wife and not being able to drive after dark I probably wouldn’t have much success.
That’s not fair. There ought to be a law!