Monday Afternoon Links – Cancel Culture Edition

Walmart Apologizes For Sweater Showing Santa Claus With Lines Of Cocaine

Walmart is apologizing for selling sweaters that appear to show Santa with lines of cocaine.

The sweater says “Let It Snow” and includes three white lines on a table in front of Santa.

Part of the description said: “The best snow comes straight from South America” and that “Santa really likes to savor the moment when he gets his hands on some quality, grade-A, Colombian snow.”

Cocaine Santa? CANCELED!


Richard Jewell Turns a True Story Into a Libertarian Fable

Pop culture’s recent reconsiderations of ’90s tabloid figures have tended to flatter liberals’ belief in the left-leaning arc of the moral universe. Documentaries like O.J.: Made in America (about Simpson) and Lorena (about the Bobbitt case), as well as dramatizations like I, Tonya (as in Harding) and The People v. O.J. Simpson: American Crime Story (as much about prosecutor Marcia Clark as Simpson himself), have excavated histories of abuse and recontextualized the scandals in light of newer, more nuanced understandings of gender, race, and power. But hardly any of these projects, which implicitly celebrate the social progress of the past two decades, hail from conservative points of view. That makes Clint Eastwood’s Richard Jewell, about the Atlanta security guard falsely accused of bombing the 1996 Summer Olympics, a notable exception, if not necessarily a notable film.

A movie shows a person harassed and victimized by the government and media being harassed and victimized by the government and media?!? Goddamn you, Clint Eastwood, you crazy Republican Man!

I don’t advise it, but if you have never subjected yourself to Slate’s Inkoo Kang it might be worth reading it. She’s one of the worst movie and television critics around. She doesn’t review movies and television so much as subject them to a struggle session to see how well they conform to her little red book. And most are found wanting.

Clint Eastwood? CANCELED!


Work in Progress Redeems Saturday Night Live‘s Traumatic ‘Pat’ Character

Work in Progress is a loosely fictionalized version of the foibles of Abby McEnany, a 45-year-old Chicago improv scene stalwart who identifies as a “queer fat dyke” and, in the first episode, struggles with mental health hurdles that include lining up 180 almonds gifted to her by a “fuckin’ bitch” at work. If her life doesn’t improve by the 180th almond, she tells her therapist, she is going to take her own life. One problem, though, is that her therapist has literally died during her session, almost gleefully staring at the ceiling, maw agape, as Abby details her suicidal ideation. “Are you fucking kidding me?” whispers Abby, once distraught, after lightly kicking her shrink’s leg. It creaks, rigor mortis set in.

It’s a credit to McEnany’s comedic skills that a scene that could have been overly maudlin, even cliché, is actively hilarious, never belittling the depression her character is experiencing but skilled enough to contextualize it with an unpredictable sort of gallows humor. In the pilot episode, which McEnany shot for $3,000 and screened at Sundance before Showtime picked it up for a series, Abby balances a sort of resigned gloom about her future with bursts of often-awkward hope, like when she ends up on a date with Chris (Theo Germaine)—a cute, much-younger trans man working at a lunch spot—after her sister Alison (Karin Anglin) gives him Abby’s phone number.

Traumatic. Trauma. Like being shelled by the enemy for three days straight. Like watching your friends starved to death in a prison camp. Trauma. Oh, the lives destroyed by sketch comedy!

Comedy Sketch from  25 years ago? CANCELED!


Did the car consent? Did anyone even ask it?

Tawny Kitaen from 1987? CANCELED!

(Side Note: Kitaen’s first cinematic starring role was in the sword and sandals gigglefest, The Perils of Gwendoline in the Land of the Yik Yak

Flip through the photos on that imdb link. It looks fantastically bad.

Seriously, what in the damn hell is going on here?

Comments

312 responses to “Monday Afternoon Links – Cancel Culture Edition”

  1. Count Potato

    “Part of the description said: “The best snow comes straight from South America” and that “Santa really likes to savor the moment when he gets his hands on some quality, grade-A, Colombian snow.””

    Damn. I thought SF made that up.

    1. Count Potato

      If reality continues in this direction, I think we might have to accept that Edgar Allan Poe and Phillip K. Dick were perfectly sane.

      1. Certified Public Asshat

        Even the marrying your 13 year old cousin part?

        1. Not Adahn

          Was she hot?

        2. Bobarian LMD

          Goodness, Gracious, Great Balls of Fire!

    2. Tonio

      It is becoming increasingly difficult to write over-the-top satire given the reality in which we live.

  2. Playa Manhattan

    “and The People v. O.J. Simpson: American Crime Story (as much about prosecutor Marcia Clark as Simpson himself), have excavated histories of abuse and recontextualized the scandals in light of newer, more nuanced understandings of gender, race, and power.”

    He sawed his ex-wife’s head almost completely off of her body. But it’s really nuanced, you see.

    1. leon

      You would think that Jewell is/was a pretty pitiable character. But no, according to reviews, the character we should feel bad for is the journalist, because she’s dead and can’t defend herself.

      Don’t bother asking them what happened to Jewell.

    2. Playa Manhattan

      Oh, and OJ’s high priced defense team exploited the black community’s historical mistrust of the police so that their obviously guilty client could walk free after murdering 2 people in cold blood. I guess that’s nuanced too.

      1. Tonio

        “If the glove don’t fit, you must acquit.” Brilliant.

        1. Bobarian LMD

          Why’s he talking about Chewbacca?

      2. Gustave Lytton

        Add on there prosecutorial & police misconductincompetence.

      3. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”
        1. Playa Manhattan

          “That’s some bad luck, when the one guy who would have died for you kills you.”

      4. Pope Jimbo

        I was living in Memphis when that whole thing hit the fan. It was pretty funny watching all the black gals I knew start bitching about how OJ should be sent to prison for the crime of marrying a white gal.

        1. Tundra

          Is that still a thing? Because that Brewer of Color from your story the other day is married to a white chick. Does he lose points?

          1. cyto

            Absolutely. Black women resent the hell out of Black men who run off with white women.

            A big part of it is the number of black men who are either in jail or even dead. That creates an imbalance in the ratio of male to female. Add to that the success black women have in the workplace – well outpacing black men in college education and white collar jobs…. and if you are a successful black woman, finding a black man who is in your social stratum is hard. So you can see why they might resent it if “their man” runs off with some blond bimbo who isn’t even black.

          2. Tundra

            What about black chicks who marry white guys?

          3. Count Potato

            I think that’s called the NFL

          4. Count Potato

            Woops, Gilmored!

    3. Rhywun

      recontextualized the scandals in light of newer, more nuanced understandings of gender, race, and power

      What a bunch of post-modernist claptrap.

      1. JD is Unemployed

        The most exquisite sophistry.

  3. leon

    @SF. My wife loves to tell me every time we pass a Subaru that it is going to kill us. She doesn’t read much here, but has enjoyed Subaru Horror Theater.

    1. Count Potato

      It deserves a bigger audience. I wonder if it could be published without getting sued by Subaru?

      1. SugarFree

        I don’t see how. Subarus drive people to murder, madness, child sacrifice, and pacts with Elder Gods. Pretty defamatory, even as satire.

        1. leon

          What if you changed it to Saabaru?

          1. SugarFree

            I think using their commercials is what would get me.

          2. Tonio

            You do link to them, but do not claim them as your own. IANAL, but I would hope this would fall under the fair use provision. Also, no publicity is bad publicity and as long as you don’t do merch based on it…

          3. Not Adahn

            Subaru probably wouldn’t care.

            The twenty-something “creative” at the ad agency on the other hand…

          4. Pope Jimbo

            no publicity is bad publicity

            Pelaton is calling for you on line 1.

            *If anyone has a copyright claim, I think it is SF against all the johnny-come-latelys who are so full of themselves about their scary take on the Pelaton ad.

          5. Tundra

            It cracks me up that their stock dropped after that whole thing. And Ryan Reynolds was outstandingly savvy to have her do a commercial for his booze. Well played, Deadpool.

          6. Pope Jimbo

            The next ad should be that gal telling her friends:

            Pelaton Gal: I’m getting my life back together. I’m on new diet
            Gal1: Good for you, what is it?
            PG: It is the Aviation Gin only diet.
            Gal2: Does it work?
            PG: Yeah! So far I’ve lost 2 days.

        2. Count Potato

          I have no idea, since the law regarding such things rarely makes sense.

        3. blackjack

          The power of Subaru compels you! The power is Subaru compels you!

    2. SugarFree

      In Pittsburgh with one of the fellow founders. He noticed pretty much every other car on the road was a Subaru. He was seriously creeped out. I told him to repeat, “They’re only commercials, they’re only commercials.”

      (But, seriously, the bougie part of Pittsburgh is dense in Subarus.)

      1. Jarflax

        Does repeating that summon Bloody Helga and her lesbian Subaru of Despair?

        1. SugarFree

          All death is lesbian bed death.

    3. pistoffnick

      Subarus are pretty much the default here in N. MN

      Hell, we own 4 of them. Not one has a “COEXIST!” or “Bernie” bumpersticker though (we stand out for the lack of those)

      1. Pope Jimbo

        Before you get too full of yourself Nick, admit that the reason you don’t have any of those stickers is because you can’t force yourself to cover up any of the Wellstone stickers that cover the back of your cars.

      2. Tundra

        I dare you to put a Gadsden flag on one of them.

        1. Gadfly

          Or more subtly, one of those parody Coexist stickers.

          1. The Last American Hero

            The Game of Thrones one was funny, and less likely to get your car keyed by a Bernie Bro.

  4. Count Potato

    “She’s one of the worst movie and television critics around. ”

    That’s a high bar. Or a low bar. I’m not sure how being the worst works. Is it like hurdles or limbo dancing?

    1. leon

      I always get confused when someone says something is subpar…

      Don’t you want to be subpar in golf?

      1. I couldn’t care less.

        1. leon

          I think you mean “I could care less”

          1. Irregardless. you know what I mean.

          2. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

            This is some grade “A” trolling. Respect

          3. Raven Nation

            I assume you’re referencing this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=om7O0MFkmpw but I thought I would post it just in case.

        2. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

          Next thing you know, Hyp is going to be typing “irregardless”

          *smh*

          1. You mean “regardful”.

            /sarcasm

      2. SugarFree

        Par just meant “normal” or “average” before it was applied to golf. Its original use was about gauging parity in monetary exchange rates for metal-backed currency, where being subpar would be a bad thing.

      3. Dr. Fronkensteen

        Do you want to play golf?

  5. Trigger Hippie

    ‘The company said the sweaters do not represent Walmart’s values.’

    SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY!!!

    1. leon

      First they stop selling guns and ammo, now they don’t sell the shirts with Cocaine on it. Say what you want, but Walmart is abandoning it’s homegrown Arkansas principles.

      1. Unreconstructed

        I didn’t think they grew coca in Arkansas – wouldn’t Arkansas homegrown be greener?

      2. Pope Jimbo

        Mark my words, before you know it they will abandon the rest of their Arkansas principles too. They won’t sell women’s yoga tights with a 54″ waist.

        Speaking of Arkansas, has Lach been around lately?

    2. PBRstreetgang

      Yeah, WalMart’s more of a meth and Oxy type outfit.

      1. Trigger Hippie

        Touche, salesman.

  6. Flip through the photos on that imdb link. It looks fantastically bad.

    It’s like Popeye (the Robin Williams one), Krull, and Romancing the Stone had a three-way Throuple.

    1. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

      They need to do a Popeye remake with a hologram Robin Williams. Hollywood keeps pumping out shit, while not go for full on diarrhea?

      1. PBRstreetgang

        They’ll probably recast Popeye with Hannah Gabsdy as the lead.

        1. SugarFree

          Popeye is just too depressed to fight Bluto. And Wimpy is a social justice activist fighting the 99% that pay for their burgers. Lindy West is Olive Oyl to promote body positivity. Kale is the new spinach. The pipe is a fanny pack.

          1. PBRstreetgang

            And Lizzo will do the soundtrack

          2. SugarFree

            paging barfman

          3. JD is Unemployed

            I searched Lindy West. I wish I hadn’t. It’s not her physique that gets me to barfing, it’s that “LORD GIVE ME THE CONFIDENCE OF A MEDIOCRE WHITE MALE” tea shart.

      2. Pan Zagloba

        Because holo-Williams won’t sell in China.

        Now, a remake with Will Smith in it? That might fly.

        1. Trigger Hippie

          I thought the ChiComs didn’t care for movies staring those with a darker skin coloring. Or were just being snarky?

          1. Pan Zagloba

            You thought wrong. They love them some Will Smith, and for all the screeching, Black Panther did well in China ($105 million). They’ll watch black people, as long they aren’t too black, and there’s special effects and minimal preaching.

            Now, try and get some The Gay into China and it gets more subtle (tasteful, 90s-style The Gay is OK, as is Plausibly Deniable The Gay).

          2. Trigger Hippie

            Huh, guess that was just some internet background noise that got through the filter.

          3. JD is Unemployed

            I’d be interested to know if the China release of Black Panther had a special extra scene to shoehorn in a Chinese actor like Iron Man 3. I imagine a scene with some kind of Chinese trade delegation meeting with King T’Challa where we find out that all that fancy Wakandan technology is actually supplied by the Chinese who invented it all by themselves with no industrial espionage whatsoever.

      3. cyto

        Popeye was an amazing creation – because the creativity and intense performances were coupled with …. well, just a heaping mound of terrible. It is rare to see such passionate work going into such shite.

    2. KSuellington

      Romancing the Stone was a great 80’s flick. The sequel sucked tho.

      1. blackjack

        It ain’t no “they live,” but with the right glasses on, I can watch it.

        1. Tundra

          It was a terrific movie. Kathleen Turner was really, really hot back then.

      2. I was 16 when that came out and adored it.

        I need a re-watch.

      3. Rhywun

        I remember liking the song. Never saw the movie 🙁

    3. We actually saw Perils of Gwendolyn in the theater. Tawny Kitaen is pretty naked through most of it, so we didn’t mind the quality.

      1. zwak

        That is what I remember the most too.

  7. Playa Manhattan

    Just completed the wire transfer for my property taxes, which are delinquent starting tomorrow (minimum $500 penalty). They should be due on Election Day.

    1. ChipsnSalsa

      You didn’t opt for bringing in pennies?

      1. Playa Manhattan

        I’m 4 weeks past the due date. Didn’t want to press my luck. I have no idea how long it would take them to count 500,000 pennies, but they’d probably slap me with the penalty.

    2. Dr. Fronkensteen

      Also should be due on election day. One check for your yearly income taxes.

    3. KSuellington

      Heh, heh. We just mailed ours in last week. Property taxation is theft. Here they get around Prop 13 by adding some bullshit new bond tax every fucking year. They just passed another one in November. Bastards.

      1. Playa Manhattan

        They just passed a school bond last year (our district has 33% less funding per student than LAUSD. Go figure). I actually voted in favor (I have 3 boys in the system). If I have to pay for all of the boomers’ free shit, they can pay for mine.

        1. Sean

          Don’t most boomers get reduced property taxes?

          1. Playa Manhattan

            They don’t get reduced parcel assessments for school bonds unless it’s specifically included in the bond measure (and when it is, it’s bullshit).

            However, in CA, “seniors” over the age of 55 can transfer their low property tax base to a new home once. So for people who have owned a home here since the ’70s, they can buy a multi-million dollar house and pay almost nothing in property taxes (i.e. theoretically my parents, who paid $70,000 for the house they’re living in now).

          2. Lackadaisical

            Here they do (once old enough), dunno about other states.

          3. Sean

            I know PA has some sort of homestead rebates for old folks.

            So does NJ, but they fucked theirs all up:

            https://www.njspotlight.com/2019/09/a-look-at-the-fuzzy-math-of-njs-homestead-tax-relief-program/

          4. creech

            Yeah, it is so “lucrative” I can splurge at Red Lobster once a year.

          5. Sean

            OK, boomer.

      2. JaimeRoberto Delecto

        People don’t seem to understand that bonds need to be repaid.

        1. Bobarian LMD

          That’s why we have other bonds.

          Do you even gov, Bro?

        2. Fourscore

          But maybe by the next generation, that’s the beauty of bonds. Like gov grants, they are free.

        3. Spudalicious

          25% of our property taxs are school bonds.

    4. Tonio

      Eek, that sucks. But that means you’re not under mortgage, right? I will probably never live to see that day.

      1. grrizzly

        Some banks don’t pay your property taxes even if you have a mortgage with them. You have to do it yourself. I don’t think it’s smart for those banks. Also, once we converted a mortgage into a HELOC and then had to pay taxes ourselves.

      2. kinnath

        When I refinanced, there was not escrow account. I pay insurance and taxes directly even though I have a mortgage.

      3. Playa Manhattan

        I paid the place off a few years ago, but I think we do it differently. CA payments are half in November, half in February.

        I actually prefer it this way. Rather than death by 12 paper cuts, you get 2 giant kicks in the nuts.

        1. Lackadaisical

          Huh. Ours are theoretically once a year, but they have school taxes separate which makes it two payments, one in September and one in January.

          I’d hate to pay 12x/year.

      4. Tonio

        Interesting. Thanks.

        I like the escrow deal since that means I don’t have to worry about another bill, due irregularly (ie, non-monthly).

    5. Ed Wuncler

      The school district in Barrington is gearing up for another levy after being soundly defeated last year. Despite 60 percent of our property taxes going to the school district, they for some reason need more. Granted the schools aren’t in the worst shape but has some wear and tear but it’s because a lot of the money go to Administrator’s salaries/pensions and the teacher’s pensions. If they actually admitted this and stopped hiding behind the, ‘Do it for the children, ” I would consider voting yes. Until then, fuck em.

      1. Playa Manhattan

        I won’t vote for anything that doesn’t include 100%+ of present day pension and benefits funding. Kicking that can down the road is how you get Detroit.

        1. Dr. Fronkensteen

          Some political genius got it put into the IL state constitution that we can’t cut our pensions. If we were to fully fund IL pensions we would all be in penury. Even now as we’re trying to sell my dad’s upscale home we’re going to have to take a loss what he paid for it because it is such a buyer’s market.

          1. Ed Wuncler

            Yep. And I believe the previous Republican governor had a decent plan to reform the state finances and pensions with the condition that we change the state constitution with regards to pensions (even the most retirees would have not had anything change about their pensions) and the public sector unions fought him tooth and nail.

            They don’t give a shit even though most villages revenues goes to pensions and not the services needed to maintain the village.

          2. When the state files for bankruptcy I hope all the pension payments get stopped for good.

          3. Ed Wuncler

            Me too. What’s mind boggling is that they have to know that this isn’t sustainable and Illinois is losing businesses and residents because of the mess, but they keep going full steam into a disaster.

          4. Playa Manhattan

            States can’t file for bankruptcy.

            They’re a sovereign taxing authority.

          5. Bobarian LMD

            Don’t you mean “a sucker’s market”?

          6. Dr. Fronkensteen

            Shh, We’re still trying to sell.

      2. Tonio

        They always need more, Ed. It is an article of faith that the (government) schools are chronically underfunded.

        They know that if they fix the schools they will kill off their cash cow.

      3. Barrington IL?
        Both my sisters live there. One had three girls go through that school system (all are college graduates now) and the other has two boys still in the local schools. At least you have quality schools for your tax dollars, which typically helps property values.

  8. Count Potato

    “Flip through the photos on that imdb link. It looks fantastically bad.”

    I did, and now I want to see it.

    1. JaimeRoberto Delecto

      So bad it’s good?

    2. Sean

      #metoo

      1. Count Potato

        If you are a digital agorist, you can find it pretty easily.

  9. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

    “Pop culture’s recent reconsiderations of ’90s tabloid figures”

    You know who should be brought back from the 90’s? Mase, that one rapper. Whatever happened to him? It’s like Biggie died and then Puffy just decided to become a big star off of his death and then he completely forgot about Mase.

    #Justice4Mace

    1. I thought it was Dre the motherf*ckers forgot about.

      1. Trigger Hippie

        Nas, they forgot about Nas.

        1. JD is Unemployed

          One good album Nas? It’s probably for the best he’s forgotten about save for Illmatic.

    2. JD is Unemployed

      I believe he retired in the late 90s to follow some religious calling and attend college, after which time he eventually returned to the music.

  10. B.P.

    On topic: That Santa sweater reminds me that I need to get some gifts for the family secret Santa, which usually involves gifts that are either useful or jokey. I wonder if there are any on the shelves that were overlooked. Walmart is also selling that KFC-smelling fireplace log that everyone is talking about. I might need to swing by the place.

  11. (Side Note: Kitaen’s first cinematic starring role was in the sword and sandals gigglefest, The Perils of Gwendoline in the Land of the Yik Yak

    Flip through the photos on that imdb link. It looks fantastically bad.)

    I just watched Blood Diner over the weekend. Hilariously awful.

    1. A Leap at the Wheel

      I watched Die Hard over the weekend. I don’t watch many movies, and I rarely rewatch stuff other than the original 3 Star Wars movies. But damn that is such a well done movie.

      1. kinnath

        Bruce was still filming Moonlighting while filming Die Hard. He went from being a lead in a rom/com to action movie hero in one giant step.

        1. You forgot pop star. 😐

          1. Gustave Lytton

            And ad man

            https://youtu.be/P5ZArV2wsak

            (The non-die hard Post Water is almost as bad)

      2. Count Potato

        I watch it every Christmas.

    2. Bobarian LMD

      Tawney was pretty good in Bachelor Party.

      But not near as good as Monique Gabrielle.

      1. Tundra

        Yes, her scene was, uh, captivating.

        1. Bobarian LMD

          Boneriffic, even.

  12. KSuellington

    Tawney Kitaen was fabulous with Tom Hanks in Bachelor Party. Well, not her acting skills which suck. Great scene of a donkey doing blow in that flick. It didn’t end well for that ass.

    1. Dr. Fronkensteen

      I thought her acting skill was sucking.

    2. Tundra

      Yet another movie that couldn’t be made today.

      1. Dr. Fronkensteen

        You say that like it’s a bad thing.

        Why do you hate our new glorious future?

        1. Tundra

          Why do you hate our new glorious future?

          Well, fewer drugs, gratuitous tits, humor, fart jokes, toxic masculinity, yummy feminity, fast cars, guns…

          Did I mention gratuitous tits?

    3. Drake

      That’s my go-to answer when asked what my favorite Hanks movie is. Girls look confused and guys laugh.

      1. JD is Unemployed

        There are whole new generations of kids who would be absolutely horrified by it.

  13. Not Adahn

    the Land of the Yik Yak

    Wasn’t Yik Yak cancelled becasue the yoots were using it to hate-speechify?

  14. Suthenboy

    The Santa thing is not funny and in really bad taste, but…whatever.

    The Jewell movie….look, if you don’t want people calling you an asshole, don’t be an asshole. Fuck anyone who doesn’t want the movie shown. The govt and media bought it all on their own, now they can eat it and like it.

    Pat was hilarious to a juvenile me and the scene described in the link is hilarious to the now me. Maybe I haven’t changed all that much.

    Whitesnake….worst hair band ever? They should be cancelled but not for politically correct reasons. Tawny Kitaen? Not so much.

    1. Tundra

      I think the whole Deep State thing is making you crabby. That sweater is fantastic! I wish I knew about it before my Xmas party Friday.

      1. Suthenboy

        You sound like you think I just recently got crabby.

        1. I’m sorry you have the crabs.

          1. Pope Jimbo

            crabby is better than scabby

    2. SugarFree

      Cinderella and Saigon Kick are both far worse than Whitesnake.

      1. Tundra

        Trixter and Stryper are worse than those.

        At least Coverdale could sing.

        1. SugarFree

          Stryper. Oh, man. So terrible.

          1. JD is Unemployed

            Glorious. The bee has some real gems.

          2. B.P.

            Winger.

          3. The fat kid who idolized Beavis and Butthead always wore a Winger t-shirt.

      2. Didn’t Cinderella have that one pretty good hard bluesy song? or am I thinking of Tesla.

        1. SugarFree

          “Shake Me” isn’t horrible, but also a completely generic KISS song.

          The real problem with Cinderella is rather than having one or two power ballads, they were almost all power ballads.

          1. Yeah I was thinking of ‘Heaven’s Trail’ by Tesla, Cinderella sucks.

        2. DrOtto

          Bad Seemstress Blues.

    3. Girls love all those whiny emo minor-key power ballads. I suspect a lot more boys do than will admit it, though.

      1. DrOtto

        Power Ballads killed the hair bands. I’ve been saying it for years. Girls liked the ballads, but it was guys buying the albums.

  15. Lackadaisical

    (Side Note: Kitaen’s first cinematic starring role was in the sword and sandals gigglefest, The Perils of Gwendoline in the Land of the Yik Yak

    Flip through the photos on that imdb link. It looks fantastically bad.

    Looks at least as good as that cinematic masterpiece zardoz.

    Evidence: NSFW

  16. Count Potato

    “Miss Myanmar bravely comes out as the first openly gay Miss Universe contestant – even though homosexuality is still punishable with a PRISON sentence in her home country”

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-7773337/Miss-Myanmar-bravely-comes-openly-gay-Miss-Universe-contestant.html

    Even if they’re hot?

    1. Suthenboy

      God loves lipstick lesbians.

      Nothing could be a clearer indication of the left’s intentions than their championing of the repressive cultures that stamp on the lives and rights of the groups the left loves to chide us about. Fuckin’ commie ratfucking shitweasels.

    2. Playa Manhattan

      It says “gay sex is punishable with up to 10 years in prison”.

      It doesn’t say anything about lesbian sex.

      1. Dr. Fronkensteen

        Yes loss of freedom, but is that really a punishment for that crime?

      2. Tonio

        Yeah, the prohibition is generally against males taking it up the bum.

    3. Drake

      Need video proof or I won’t believe it.

    4. Pope Jimbo

      That lady boy is she brave!

    5. Gadfly

      A rare sighting of the word “brave” being used properly.

      Also,

      Even if they’re hot?

      I suspect the punishment in that case is conversion therapy by joining the harem of some government official.

    6. Sean

      Stupid fucking DailyFail links. NO, I’m not turning off my adblocker, you Limey fucksticks.

      1. Count Potato

        Funny, I never get that.

      2. Tundra

        Did you see how many ads it blocks. Over 100!!

      3. Rhywun

        I set my browser to “always open in reader view” for the Fail. Works for now.

        1. JD is Unemployed

          How does one do this?

          1. Rhywun

            It’s built-in on Safari. Other browsers have reader plug-ins but I don’t know if you can automate it per site.

          2. JD is Unemployed

            A-ha. Those MacIntosh poindexters think of everything. I love reader mode but it looks like I’ll need some sort of add-on to make firefox or chrome default to it.

    7. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

      Myanmar? I thought they went back to being called “Burma”?

        1. That was a close shave.

  17. Count Potato

    “”LGBT acceptance appears to be declining in America. Interestingly, it’s declining among a group that is often touted as the most accepting and socially ‘woke’—millennials.””

    https://twitter.com/TPostMillennial/status/1204098202259132418

    “This is the reason why LGBT acceptance is declining…

    I am a transgender woman and YouTuber who has witnessed LGBT discourse become more extreme and intense year after year. What used to simply be a conversation about marriage equality and treating those who are different than us as equals has become a cultural hailstorm. Our community’s most popular and decorated activists often preach the most extreme of our ideas rather our most practical. Buzzwords and genders are added into the community’s vernacular at such a rate that even I can’t keep up with them. What does that say about someone who is not within the community and their ability to keep pace with the dialogue?

    I believe it is the T in LGBT (or whatever the current acronym is) that has contributed the most to the erosion of society’s understanding and acceptance of the community at large. When I transitioned 6 years ago, I remember being fearful of receiving rejection because of who I was. Now, I find myself fearful of rejection because of who trans activists have led the general public to believe I am. The push for 5-year-olds to transition, mandatory dating of trans people (unless you want to be called a bigot), and forced acceptance of biological males destroying female athletes in sports are among the most toxic ideas pushed by trans activists in 2019. As a trans woman myself, I believe none of them but often find myself anxious when meeting new people that they may think I do as a default.

    To be clear, these are also all ideas that are incompatible with the general public. It is society’s natural inclination to protect children and women. So why is it that the trans community has made it their mission to brand themselves as something that at best disregards the harm to both children and women and at worst willingly inflicts it? If this is the route the community insists on going down, I don’t see much hope at all. I expect the decline of acceptance to continue.”

    https://www.thepostmillennial.com/this-is-the-reason-why-lgbt-acceptance-is-declining/

    1. Drake

      Or maybe they are just sick of being harrangued?

      1. Tundra

        There is an LGBT fatigue that has fallen on many in society that is a direct result of the constant bullying, shaming, and virtue signalling that comes out of the community—or at least, the activists that are placed on a pedestal to speak on our behalf.

        She is spot on.

        Also, I really have trouble believing Blaire was once a dude.

        1. Rhywun

          It’s just another example of the phenomenon that every group or organization that doesn’t take preventative measures eventually gets taken over by the left and operated for its own purposes.

          1. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

            And the LGBT community is certainly not the only group to have that happen to them. *Cough* ACLU *cough*

    2. grrizzly

      Clearly a transgender Republican.

      1. SugarFree

        Buffalo Bill Republican

        1. Bobarian LMD

          Firing up the theme music

          1. I thought this was going to be the theme music.

          2. Rhywun

            Ha, that actual mayor at the time was in there.

    3. I have come to the realization that the problem is…nobody cares.

      If you dress the way you want to be seen, nobody cares what is or is not between your legs or on your chest.

      People have lives to live and you are not part of their thought process.

      That’s the problem. They are not part of anyone else’s thought process.

      PAY ATTENTION TO ME!!!

      1. Tundra

        Ah, you’ve met my little sister.

        1. No, but I have met my children…

    4. JaimeRoberto Delecto

      Sound more like T acceptance is declining.

      1. Tundra

        LGB won the battle years ago. T became fashionable and decided that civil rights LARPing was just the thing to advance the acronym.

    5. Suthenboy

      No one really gave a shit until the left starting rubbing our noses in it and just. wont. leave. it. alone.

      I am sick of hearing about it. Worse, the psychological warfare on our youth getting them to ruin their lives really pisses me off.

      1. Grumbletarian

        Yep. The movement went from “Get out of our bedroom!” to “Rejoice at what we do in our bedroom, bigot!”

  18. Count Potato

    “Nothing accidental. Yes I unapologetically argue for deplatorming all pornographers. Put them in jail too.”

    https://twitter.com/MattWalshBlog/status/1203033049967009792

    Christ, what an asshole.

    1. My #BTFSTTG Twitter stream is ablaze with kicking this guy’s ass.

      1. Lackadaisical

        BTFSTTG

        Gesundheit.

    2. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

      This is retarded, but I refuse to care

      1. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

        The irony, of course, is that I remember this guy once singing the praises of Houellebecq (the closest thing to pornography in the current mainstream literary world). He clearly does not read and probably just read a blurb praising Houellebcq’s work.

        1. JD is Unemployed

          Long story short: I once inadvertantly soaked a Houellebecq paperback in piss, and that seems entirely appropriate.

          1. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

            You sir are worse than Hitler

          2. JD is Unemployed

            Hey guy, I’ll have you know I only destroy literature accidentally and in a manner poetically befitting it’s content.

    3. Certified Public Asshat

      Ha, he also retweeted this:

      Recap of the great twitter porn debate ft. @MattWalshBlog vs. various conservatives over the weekend. Sometimes libertarians forget all laws uphold some kind of moral. May as well be an anarchist if nothing can be legislated. https://t.co/atMrjOWLQY— Dan Andros (@DanAndros) December 9, 2019

      1. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

        A better criticism would be how rabidly angry many libertarians get when someone suggests banning porn, but how quite and uninterested libertarians become when other First Amendment rights are legislated out of existence. Matt Walsh is dumb.

        1. Scruffy Nerfherder

          The LP did attract a lot of libertines and freaks over the years.

        2. Tonio

          “all laws uphold some kind of moral”

          Um, no.

          1. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

            At least, they shouldn’t.

            But, imagine complaining about transgender pronoun laws and then turning around and saying “hey, let’s ban porn”. Do you even use your brain, brah?

          2. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

            Conservatism is progressivism driving the speed limit

          3. Gadfly

            At least, they shouldn’t.

            I’m going to object here, as the vast majority of laws exist for either the purpose of enforcing a moral code, for maintaining order, or some combination of the two. And really, it is the moral purpose of laws that animate people to support them, even if they have a perfectly good order rationale. And in fact, it is moral reasons that best support laws that protect the individual, for without moral support what rationale could be given to support an individual against the greater good? A better argument is not that laws shouldn’t be moral, but that the moral basis for laws should be one from an ethic of liberty and tolerance.

          4. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

            Fair point, but I like to think of “rights” as separate from “law”. You can have a moral basis underpinning “rights”, but these rights exist regardless of law or morals because they are “self-evident” and exist outside of the construct of the state.

            Laws, I think, should be separate from morality

    4. Scruffy Nerfherder

      I notice his twitter photo includes alcohol.

      Alcohol consumption leads to bad outcomes.

      Deplatform him.

    5. SugarFree

      Who is Matt Welsh, why do people think he’s a libertarian and why are people paying attention to him?

      1. Scruffy Nerfherder

        Libertarian = Person with weird ideas

        1. SugarFree

          I wonder if everyone thinks he’s Matt Welch.

          1. Bobarian LMD

            He is a person with weird ideas.

          2. Count Potato

            Some people have.

          3. JD is Unemployed

            Welch’s snapping at The Jacket during the Monday podcasts, and The Jacket’s ever more devil-may-care attitude to airing that laundry publically on said podcast can make for some uncomfortable listening. I used to just think Suder-man’s autistic interruptions and “to be clear” monologues where a wee bit awkward but now I think it must be awful uncomfortable to be a Suder-man or a Katherine Mongo-just-Ward in great game of life on that podcast.

          4. The Last American Hero

            Did the Jacket diss NATO or something?

          5. pan fried wylie

            I keep seeing the name and thinking “that doesn’t sound like something the dude from Upright Citizen’s Brigade would say”

  19. Raven Nation

    Regarding comments on an earlier post: I suspect Lungberg will keep his job for a bit longer but Pellegrini is toast.

    1. Certified Public Asshat

      It’s been awhile, but I was very wrong about the chances of Mourinho going to Spurs. So far though, I am happy to have been wrong.

      *check back in 18 months when he blows the team up*

      1. Raven Nation

        One commentator noted after Mourinho’s first game (3-2 win at West Ham) that, “it’s not Mourinho’s first game in charge that matters, it’s his 101st.”

        And, on Spurs, I’ve re-watched Son’s goal half-a-dozen times since Saturday.

  20. LJW

    America’s influence, once so dominant, waning under Trump

    “Three years into Donald Trump’s presidency, America’s global influence is waning. In interviews with The Associated Press, diplomats, foreign officials and scholars from numerous countries describe a changing world order in which the United States has less of a central role.”

    They say it like it’s bad.

    1. Ed Wuncler

      Fuck the Europeans. As someone said it best in the last post, they should fund their own military expeditions instead of using the US as their global mercenaries. If we told Merkel tomorrow that we’re withdrawing all of our forces from Germany, she would lose her shit.

      1. Chafed

        Undoubtedly. Germany’s natural gas deals with Russia will leave them vulnerable for at least a generation. I don’t know what their leadership is thinking.

        1. Drake

          They were worried a tsunnami would hit their nuke plants.

        2. Ed Wuncler

          Their leadership didn’t care because they always thought that the US would be there to absorb the costs of defense. In their minds, if the Russians get too out of pocket, the US military being there would incentivize them (the Russians) to not be total assholes.

    2. Dr. Fronkensteen

      I thought that’s what the liberals wanted?

      1. Pope Jimbo

        It is like “affordable housing”. They want it a lot, but heaven forbid that there is ever a market correction in the real estate market.

    3. Tonio

      Diplomats, foreign-aid dependent leeches, and hangers-on see the gravy train ending; not liking it none too much.

      Good.

    4. Gadfly

      In what way did the US used to have a central role that it does not now? It still has the largest economy and strongest military, so it seems unlikely that it has a reduced capacity to influence world events towards its liking. None of the allies mentioned in the article as drifting away from the US actually seem to be that important to the US, rather it seems like they were treating the US as a sugar daddy and have now moved on to a different mark. And really, who else is going to play the central role in the world order if not the US – Russia, China? I’d bet a lot of the people pissing on the US would find the alternatives to be much less benevolent masters.

      1. B.P.

        But, but…. the U.S. withdrew a brigade from Syria. It’s a complete abandonment of the world stage and retreat into isolationism.

    5. Rhywun

      Why can’t we be more like China??

  21. Count Potato

    “Man decapitates a woman and eats her BRAIN as a topping on rice before being arrested in the Philippines

    A man has been arrested on suspicion of murder in the Philippines after he allegedly decapitated a woman and then ate her brain.

    Lloyd Bagtong, 21, was arrested Thursday on the island of Mindanao after the unidentified woman’s partially clothed remains were found around two and a half miles from his home.

    Bagtong allegedly told police that he was drunk and hungry when the woman tried to speak to him in the early morning in English, which he didn’t understand.”

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7762893/Man-decapitated-woman-ate-brain-topping-rice-Philippines.html

    1. SugarFree

      Comments are gold:

      Lychee2u, Sepang, Malaysia, 3 days ago

      This is why i stop dating men…

    2. JaimeRoberto Delecto

      But what about her liver? Can’t they find a good Chianti in the Philippines?

    3. Scruffy Nerfherder

      I hate it when the cannibals get drunk and hungry.

    4. Social Justice is Neither

      Not a very smart move.

  22. B.P.

    “Trending: FIRE Savers Race to Retirement” (aka millenials in RVs are coming to live on your couch for a while)

    https://getpocket.com/explore/item/fire-savers-race-to-retirement?utm_source=pocket-newtab

    FIRE is Financial Independence, Retire Early. The article traces several couples/families who are “retiring” early, some as young as in their 20s.

    It resonated with me a tad bit, as I’ll be 50 soon and I’m sick of sitting behind a desk. I’ve socked away quite a bit of money, and I’m ready to deliver packages or walk dogs or something. What I’m not going to do is live in a Sprinter van.

    1. pistoffnick

      That’s exactly what I wanted to do (except with a sailboat, not an RV).

      I just turned farty-nine and don’t have enough “fuck you” money saved yet.

      1. Tundra

        +2 college educations

        1. B.P.

          I have that in my future too. I’ve already told the boy he can go to the service academy of his choice.

          1. Tundra

            I’m only gonna have two overlapping years, so that’s a good thing!

            Actually, it’s not so bad. Both my kids are hardworking shitlords, so the money doesn’t feel wasted.

  23. SugarFree

    Ok, so The Perils Of Gwendoline In The Land Of The Yik Yak is not on any streaming service I could find, but it is available on torrent. I saw on imdb that people were talking about the voice sync being off, but it is way, way off. Like badly-dubbed kung fu flick out of sync, even though they were speaking English in the first place.

    1. One can rent it on amazon prime for $1.99. In fact after I go down to the local for a burger I believe that I will.

    2. Count Potato

      I just checked, the sync seems OK.

      1. SugarFree

        Maybe I pulled down a bad copy.

        1. SugarFree

          VLC forced the sync.

    3. Stinky Wizzleteats

      From the YouTube clips I can only conclude that it looks to be several orders of magnitude worse than Zardoz.

      1. SugarFree

        I’m a few minutes in. It’s like all the scenes you fast-forward through in 80s porn.

        The French sidekick girl is super-adorable.

        1. The amazon review referred to her as ‘French sex kitten’ so of course I did a image search and you are correct sir.

        2. We’re not saying BEAM’s an alien, but . . .

          The French sidekick girl is super-adorable.

          Yah. My bunk — I’ll be in it.

    4. Chafed

      The real question is how much of Ms. Kitaen do we get to see?

      1. SugarFree

        More than Bachelor Party, but less than Witchboard.

        1. Count Potato

          I’ve never seen Witchboard.

          1. SugarFree

            It’s OK. The highlight is her full frontal scene.

          2. Timeloose

            Can confirm. Pre boob job as well.

    5. l0b0t

      This copy is somewhat better (link expires on Friday) – https://mega.nz/#!BWA1AC5B!bS-Q5gE_7tJ6RPnO2Od9AdtQImUDAKknZUMVzx8iJx8

    6. straffinrun

      Excellent links, BTW. Following Animal’s Hemingway piece… Y’all are slaying it around here.

  24. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

    Poor one out for Paul Volker who passed away. He was still a fed chief, so fuck him, but at the same time he was the last fed chief who significantly raised interest rates, despite the screams of Armageddon.

    I’d take him over supposed Objectivist, Alan Greenspan, any day of the week.

    1. Raven Nation

      If any one person should get credit for “solving” stagflation, it’s probably Volcker.

      1. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

        His interest rate hikes were the original “people will die”

        1. Raven Nation

          Still is, apparently: https://theweek.com/articles/810196/everyone-loves-paul-volcker-everyone-wrong

          The article is by someone known as Jeff Spross. Here’s a sample of his genius:

          “Yes, Volcker successfully tamed inflation. The question is whether there was a better way to do it than setting off a massive recession. At the time, America was dealing with oil shocks, a broken consumer price index, the fallout from funding the Vietnam War, the end of the Bretton Woods system, and a new political enthusiasm for massive tax cuts for the wealthy. Any combination of these factors could have been driving the price spiral.

          But Volcker’s solution destroyed the American working class for a generation. Unemployment peaked as high or higher than in the Great Recession. Unions, already in decline, went into free fall. Volcker explicitly viewed breaking the power of organized labor as a critical piece of his anti-inflation crusade. “The standard of living of the average American has to decline,” Volcker declared shortly after becoming Fed Chair. Trace the modern trends in wage stagnation and inequality, and they lead back to Volcker’s recession.”

          1. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

            What horse shit. Keynesians will never get over the fact that stagflation forever proved their Phillips Curve

          2. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

            *disproved

          3. Scruffy Nerfherder

            “I’m a dumbass”

  25. Chafed

    I have the misfortune of watching Nadler’s impeachment hearing while eating lunch. It’s a joke. I have no love for Trump. But if this is the best the Dems have then they aren’t going to move public opinion one iota. They will impeach in the House but there won’t be any pressure on the Senate to remove.

    1. Drake

      That guy was less creepy when he was a giant fatso. Now he’s the old weirdo with his pants pulled up to his armpits.

      1. Rhywun

        I don’t see it.

        /Al Sharpton

  26. Count Potato

    James Comey in the Washington Post defending James Comey

    “So it was all lies. No treason. No spying on the campaign. No tapping Trumps wires. It was just good people trying to protect America.”

    https://twitter.com/Comey/status/1204136276582113280

    1. Stinky Wizzleteats

      Comey is such a self-righteous ass. How someone like him rose to the upper echelons of a (used to be at least) prestigious organization is beyond me.

      1. leon

        He really is an obnoxious ass.

        1. You say that like it’s a bad thing.

      2. Scruffy Nerfherder

        Pfffttttt, the FBI is full of self important assholes and always has been.

        1. Spudalicious

          Pretty much every cop I’ve known couldn’t stand them. They were considered arrogant frat boys that thought they were better than everyone else. And that came from cops.

          1. Tundra

            I had a neighbor who was an FBI gunner. He hated most of his co-workers, too.

        2. Gustave Lytton

          Comey was an appointee. He likes to pretend he came up in the org, but he didn’t.

  27. straffinrun

    *Stretches* Just got up and will assume the IG report insists that Carter Page be given a formal apology for having his civil rights violated, the FISA court shown to be in need of dismantlement and multiple heads of agencies taken to task for allowing/encouraging/committing clearly politically motivated behavior. *Scratches balls*

    1. Spudalicious

      Yeah, wrong on all counts. Some pretty damning stuff though. I think Durham will shortly begin putting people in jail. Horowitz was only allowed to investigate within the DOJ.

      1. Scruffy Nerfherder

        It was all just “errors”.

        My read is that Horowitz is not willing to ascribe intent to the actions as it would put him and his department in a tight political spot.

        But withholding exculpatory evidence is never an error.

        1. Spudalicious

          From what I’ve read about him, Durham doesn’t play that game.

          1. Scruffy Nerfherder

            Doesn’t appear that way.

            Good.

    1. AlmightyJB

      So being gay is a social construct?

      1. Trigger Hippie

        Conversion Therapy, FTW!

    2. JD is Unemployed

      I don’t imagine that it’s something many of them are willing or able to accept.

    3. Lackadaisical

      The last one is gold.

  28. Trigger Hippie

    Well, for those around in the morning links, I bought a car. A used Park Avenue. Never drove a Buick before but it’s in good condition, has low miles, and was owned and worked on by a mechanic I actually trust. So, glad that’s out of the way. Still not thrilled about the timing of the expense, but that’s life.

    1. Tundra

      What year? I love those.

      1. Trigger Hippie

        2002. Still only has 123,000 miles on it.

        1. Tundra

          Great cars. My FIL had a bunch of them. Nice find!

          1. Trigger Hippie

            Thanks, I sure hope so. Buying that pretty much tapped out my savings account for the rest of the year. I can’t afford any extra surprises until Spring.

    2. Lackadaisical

      US or China vintage?

      1. Trigger Hippie

        I’m not sure. I’m assuming American. How can you tell?

        1. Tundra

          It’s USA.

    3. The Bearded Hobbit

      In the last decade or so of his life Dad became a hard-core Buick fan. Mom’s Lucerne is as nice a car as I’ve driven.

    4. Spudalicious

      Buick Park Avenue? Look at the shitlord, here.

    5. We’re not saying BEAM’s an alien, but . . .

      I dunno if they’re cheap to drive, but I’ll bet they’re damned comfortable. The spousal unit still mourns the loss (trade-in, actually) of the 2001 VW Passat which we swapped for a new RAV4 (which she also wanted, in red, of course). She mourns it because, unlike the RAV4, the Passat could transport us thousands of klicks in comfort and ease during our not-infrequent road trips, not to mention a certain amount of élan, which is an ineffable quality a RAV4 will never possess. I suspect a Park Avenue has similar élan.

      1. Tundra

        Mine drives a 2015 Passat and absolutely loves it. I had a 1998 (first year of the new body style) and, until some motherfucker ran a red and crushed it, it was one of my favorite cars.

    6. Count Potato

      Well, good for you!

  29. Trigger Hippie

    I believe this may be the first instance ever where somebody has given somebody else shit for being a fancy-pants because they bought an eighteen year old used car for a few grand. 😉

    1. hayeksplosives

      I got a 1989 Grand Marquis as my first car out of college. It was huge, plush, and had few miles. Had been an old lady’s car she rarely used.

      People teased me about it but always wanted to go to lunch or wherever in my car because it was so comfy.

      1. Trigger Hippie

        Ugh, my first car was an ’83 Grand Marquis I bought off my uncle. Little did I know, he had it sitting in a feild for two years before I bought it. The heat barely worked, bad suspension, and at one point radiator fluid fumes began coming through the vents.

        Nobody gave me shit for being fancy.

        1. Sean

          My first car was an 82 Crown Vic. Thanks mom & dad.

          I hit a lot of stuff with that car. It was very durable.

    2. Tundra

      Hi!

      Welcome to Glibs!

      1. Trigger Hippie

        I was still holding out hope that I could salvage my ride until yesterday afternoon. Timing’s a bitch, ain’t it?

        1. *groan* SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO close, and yet, so far away.

  30. Trigger Hippie

    Oops, for Spud.

  31. mrfamous

    The Atlanta Journal Constitution appears to be leading the charge against the Richard Jewell film. I’m assuming because they’d like to distract from the fact that they could be found somewhat culpable for all of Eric Rudolph’s future victims.

    They and their reporters acted reprehensibly in the Jewell fiasco and were handed a gift by the courts. They should have been sued into oblivion. So by all means, fuck them if they have the gall to pretend they are some sort of victim here.