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  • Florida Man Rings in 2019

    Florida Man needed a straw to finish his weather control device and he needed it nearly as badly as he needed a couple drinks to take the edge off of what must have been a legendary New Years Eve party, judging from the fact that he was wearing someone else’s clothes, his sinuses were still firing meth highs every time he sniffled, and he’d started on Boxing Day. What had begun as simple party with his minions to celebrate the new weather machine design had… Well, he wasn’t sure, but either they’d be zapping him with one of his own brain scramblers, or he hadn’t drawn a sober breath in a week.

    Be that as it may, Florida Man was going to start 2019 right. This would be the year that he finally completed something that worked. His weather machine had the ability to steer hurricanes towards… well anything really, but he was pretty sure there were some developers that would pay big money to get in on the ground floor of government redevelopment grants and a shot at commercial insurance fraud. Plus, he had several municipalities that he owed vengeance. And all he needed to complete it was one plastic straw.

    “Gimme a tall drink with a plastic straw,” he told the girl behind the register.

    “Ain’t got no plastic straws as of today.”

    “What, like, you’re out?”

    “No, dude. City passed a law. No more plastic straws. We don’t give ’em out no more starting today so the owner can sound like he gives a shit at the Chamber of Commerce meetings.”

    This couldn’t be. He needed a straw. Nobody was going to stand in his way this time. Even yuppie St. Pete wouldn’t do that. That’s stupid. Even a bunch of mouth-breathers like the St. Pete City Council wouldn’t do that! This woman was obviously associated with his ex-wife and former co-conspirator (unindicted) Florida Woman. That bitch was always trying to ruin his life.

    He would make her give him a goddamn straw!

    Okay, next time he would send a minion to go get the straw. That counter girl was tiny… but fierce! Those sharp little knuckles really did a number on him.

  • Thursday Afternoon Links

    So, anyone else here not make it a dry January? I mean, DTs are a real hassle, amirite?

    Medicare for All == Healthcare for fewer, but I doubt they care.

    Although these problems with blood pressure medications are certainly working to keep the cancer numbers up and heart attack numbers down.

    Phone app to detect depression in teens. Uh, lemme see… “Have you been laid recently?” Man that was hard.

    This was a hot topic in early 19th century literature in the US. Women detail sexual abuse by nuns. Used to be floating around for all good Protestants to be scandalized by.

     

    A little something to celebrate the Chinese Moon landing.

  • Bee Business

     

    How does one get interested in something?

    I see the Glibs with their skilled hobbies, doing things, making things. I’m not a creative type person, I don’t see the same things when I see a block of wood or piece of metal or an old car that lots of other people see. It’s not that I don’t enjoy those things when someone else creates it, I just see the literal thing.

    Instead, I see a seed growing into a plant or a tree or a flower. That I understand. Those things that don’t require any input from me, except maybe for a little care or water or fertilizer. A few years ago a friend invited me to watch him work with his honey bees. Like many or most I had my own ideas as to avoid getting involved; who wants to get stung by those thousands of angry bees? He seemed to know quite a bit, had the suit and hat and seemed oblivious to the dangers I saw. Then we took the frames with the honey to his daughter’s house one Sunday; it was like a party, other people had brought a few frames and I got involved in the processing a little, the spinning and the bottling and was rewarded with a jar of honey to take home. Now I really was interested.

    The following Spring my friend asked me if I wanted a hive. He would help me, loan or give me the necessary equipment. He gave me enough to set up a hive and even assembled it out in my yard and I was in business, sort of. I still had no idea of what was going on, but I was helping him and in turn he was helping/teaching me but I still wasn’t too involved in the actual process. We weren’t doing very well; we did everything he knew, but our production was rather limited. Seemed like we weren’t progressing very fast.

    Then he decided he wasn’t interested anymore and his daughter kind of got tired of us spreading sticky honey all over her kitchen floor and leaving her to clean up the house and the equipment. She asked if I wanted to borrow her extractor and associated equipment. I had space to store all the equipment inside my garage, along with most of the excess (old and dilapidated) hive boxes and frames. Then I found a young guy (about 50 years old) that was interested and he bought a bee suit and I loaned him some of the equipment I had borrowed. We still weren’t very productive, our ROI was always between very negative and deeply negative.

    We did that for a couple years, and a visiting fishing friend was here and was a long time beekeeper with lots of expertise. He looked at our setups and taught us some things we weren’t doing, and that year production shot up. He came again the following year and showed us more of his knowledge and skills, and he worked barehanded with only a hat and veil. Our production has soared for the last 3 years. We’re a long ways from professionals, but it’s sure a lot more fun when the honey is plentiful. Best of all we have a party at the extraction time, with Minnesota Hot Dish Pot Luck being on the menu. Most of my friends and neighbors are rather experienced (old) cooks so the food is good/plentiful and highly seasoned for Minnesota people, ketchup and mustard–but not Dijon–being the staples.

    Now, for those who are still reading this, I’ll try to pass on some of the things we do.

    We tend to think that beekeeping is only important in the summer when the bees are active, but it really is a year round project, with not much going on in the off season but still a little. We don’t winter our bees over; we have tried but the winters here are too severe. We’ve tried covering them, moving them into a shed, surrounding them with bales of hay. Nothing worked. There is hive clean up in the off season however.

    What is needed to have bees and to extract the honey, one of the main purposes of having bees?

    Equipment needed

    A hive, consisting of 2 brood boxes and 2 supers (boxes)
    A feeder tray
    10 frames for each box (actually more are necessary)
    A top cover
    A base boar

    For the skilled wood craftsman with a table saw, the boxes are fairly simple to make. For me, however, I buy them precut and assemble them myself. This is a wintertime project that gets me thinking about spring. If you are lucky enough to find some good condition hive boxes on Craigslist or a weekly shopper, even better. The problem with used equipment is there could be diseases or pests included.

    A feeder. Here in Central Minnesota our bees come early enough there isn’t any nectar yet available for the bees and they have to be fed. We buy some premade stuff that’s supposed to have protein, but sugar syrup or corn syrup is often used. Follow the recipe for the sugar syrup.

    A smoker. They are fairly expensive, about $45 or so but essential. We use dry red pine needles for fuel, creates great smoke.

    A hat with a veil. I use a broad brimmed hat with a mosquito net. A bee hat/veil is better, it keeps the bees away from your face better than a mosquito net. Again, pricey, $45 or so.

    Long gloves that extend over your sleeves, they have to be flexible enough to use tools but tough enough that the bees can’t sting through them. Kiss another 30-40 bucks away. I use yellow cotton gloves (Mr Cheapskate) but I sometimes get stung around the wrists when the jacket sleeves pull up.

    A bee keeper jacket is nice because the veil is zipped directly onto the jacket. Mr CS wears a buttoned up shirt, a jacket zipped all the way up and mosquito net pulled over the turned up collar. So far haven’t gotten bit around the neck or face lately.

    A frame tool, about 7-8 bucks but a screwdriver or a flat bar tool for pulling nails would work. The frame tool is a little better. The equipment is available on line, I use Mann Lake Bee Co, mainly because they are only 50 miles away and they have an online catalog as well.

    That’s pretty much all the start up equipment.

    OK, you found some clean hive boxes and other associated equipment on Craigslist. Buy it all or at least twice as much as you think you’ll need. Make a package offer. Not many people are going to be interested in it, the seller wants to get rid of either the equipment or his/her spouse because often those things may not be compatible.

     

     

    Where to start

    Now that winter is here and all the bee stuff is in my garage, it’s time to start cleaning the hive boxes and frames. Bees are hard workers but tend to be a little untidy inside the hive. They glue everything together with a homemade glue called propolis. I scrape the propolis from the frames and the boxes; it has hardened into something like amber and requires a little work. I like the frames to be clean at the beginning of the season so they can be removed for inspection or moved around inside the hive box.

    OK, we’re all cleaned up and finally it’s time to set up the hive in preparation for the bee arrival. I haul my stuff to a location near my garden. It’s a small platform about a foot high and about 6 feet long, big enough for two hives. Has an electric fence around it to keep out bears. We’ve had a few problems over the years and on one occasion required terminal action.

    The assembly is bottom board, 2 brood boxes, each with 10 clean frames, feeder tray and top cover. That’s it.

    We’ve pre-bought the bees at Mann Lake Bee Co, (Hackensack, MN) and have an appointment on the Saturday after the bees arrived from California, in a 40 ft trailer, usually in May.

    We have a ritual. My partner, another friend and I go to pick up the bees. I drive my pick-up. We leave early enough to stop at a country restaurant for breakfast, one of my friends picks up the tab. At Mann Lake it’s a mad house, even though we have an appointment, everyone, including us, arrives a half hour early. There are hundreds of anxious customers. Mann Lake is prepared with lots of people working invoices, sales and helping with the loading. We pick up our protein syrup and any ancillary equipment that we need, head for the bee barn, a greeter takes our invoice and brings out our order of 4 boxes of bees. Bees are sold by the pound; we get 3-pound packages, roughly 10K bees plus a viable queen per pack. The bee boxes remind you of the screened frog boxes you kept your frogs in before they all died waiting for your dad to find the time to take you fishing.

    My partner has essentially the same set up at his property, platform/fence/etc. Now we don our bee apparel. We put out his bees first, we spray them with sugar water through the screen, immediately they go into an eating frenzy, cleaning themselves and unconcerned about us. They get roughly dumped into the brood box, my partner opens the queen enclosure and gently places the enclosure in the top brood box. Next comes my attempt to pour the super elixir into the feeder tray, which is now on top of the brood boxes. Cover with the top cover and voila! Do #2 hive and we’re finished. Go to my house and repeat.

     

     

     

    After about 2 weeks we will inspect the hives by checking the feeder trays, refilling if necessary.

    Usually by this time the bees are finding enough nectar to support themselves. If they seem to be doing well we’ll remove the feeder tray and replace it with a hive box with the clean 10 frames. Now we are hoping that the queen is alive and making babies. We are hoping that in another 2 weeks some of the frames will be filling with honey. I will be doing a visual inspection about 3 times a day, mainly ’cause I am curious and have lots of time, to see if the bees are bringing in pollen.

    OK, now it’s been 1 month since we set up the hives and put in the bees.

    We do a serious inspection and find some frames are full of honey and capped with wax. We will pull those frames and replace them with empty frames. The honey frames will be placed in plastic bags and put in a freezer in my garage, to avoid any problems with bears or other bees robbing the hive. About every 2 weeks all summer we’ll pull full frames, replace with empty. Sometimes the queen will have moved up into the hive box and begun laying eggs in it. Then we have to use our second hive box so at that point we’re 4 boxes high (2 brood, 2 hive). Happens frequently.

    We have about a 3 month season here and with good luck we’ll have close to a 100 or so frames of honey. On the last pull, always the second week end of September, we’ll close out and take all frames that have enough honey in to make it worthwhile. The last step in this stage is to move the bees from my house to my partner’s property. Now instead of 10K per hive we’re looking at 30-40K per hive.

     

     

    All summer the bees have been rather docile, now they are agitated, we have stripped most all of the honey.

    We have the smoker pouring out smoke, that seems to help a little to quiet them down. I pick up a brood box and carry it to the truck. There are thousands of bees that are eager to bite me, I’m the Cheap guy with the short yellow gloves and they have found the skin around my wrists. Finally we get them into the truck, minus those that were flying or foraging when we were busy moving them. Without headgear/veils it would be impossible. This past September, I got hit 7 times that day; the stings aren’t so bad but always itch for a few days. We haul the bees about 5 miles and put them with my partner’s bees. We move the bees to avoid having them around on the following Sunday when we spin out the honey. If we didn’t move them we’d have those bees trying to recover the honey that we had taken all summer and it would be tough to try to work. Innocent folks would get stung.

    Now comes the good part.

    After the rather routine stuff all summer comes the Honey Harvest. On the 3rd Sunday of September we spin out the honey. We have an extractor that looks like an old fashion ringer washing machine tub. On the day before, I have taken all the frames out of the freezer, put them into empty hive boxes, warmed them up so the honey would flow easier. Early Sunday we start to work, uncapping the frames, spin them in the centrifuge and strain and bottle our work. We have a crew that shows up, some fly in from Dallas/Seattle, some come from Minneapolis. Guests show up about 10-11 AM and the finale is at noon when all the ladies bring out their secret recipes of hot dish and we have a great pot luck lunch. We eat and go back to work, the guests renew their acquaintances and start to drift off. The following day I’ll take a hot water hose out and wash the equipment, let it dry for a day or two and cover it up ’til the next season. Easy-peasey clean up.

     

     

    Many years ago we started with chips/dip and venison sticks, now its become a great buffet. This year we had about 40 people, some were classmates. The Pope came and blessed our endeavors, hopefully in 2019 we’ll have more Glibs, all are welcome. Family friendly, entertaining, educational.

    If any Glibs are interested,  go on line to Mann Lake Bee. See their catalog. I have seen hives in Austin, TX, in the city, easy for urban dwellers if you have a privacy fence. Check locally for bee keeper associations, find a club, or best of all, find a partner with some knowledge, help him for a year or two, watch YouTube videos. Don’t expect to make any money selling honey, the equipment is too expensive unless you are serious.

    We don’t sell any, just give it away for gifts. One has a lot more friends when one is gifting honey. I’ve heard that there is some potable beverage that can be made with honey and other ingredients. I’ll be happy to entertain questions.

  • Thursday Morning Links

    I’m still discombobulated and detoxing from the holidays.  It’ll probably take a full month to get back to where I was before Christmas.

     

     

     

    Crazy Eyes wants a unicorn in every pot.

     

     

     

    Did that tumor just assume that brain’s gender?

     

     

     

     

     

    Parkland school shooting commission releases report recommending arming teachers.

     

     

     

    McConnell calls Democrat’s House government funding proposal a “non-starter” without funding for a wall, guaranteeing an extension of libertarian Christmas.

     

     

    Republicans lashing out at Romney over his op-ed.  Doesn’t he know that neoconservatism is now dead? Even Lindsay Graham has jumped off the sinking boat.

     

     

    Florida Man justifiably gets his ass beaten by a McDonald’s Worker/former boxer after grabbing her.

     

     

    That’s all I got for today.  I’ll leave you with a song and move on with my day.

  • Poll: New Year Resolutions?

    I have an unexpected dinner guest arriving imminently for whom “family rules” don’t apply. So instead of expounding on the topic, I’m crisis cleaning. But you can still play!

     

    Do you make New Year Resolutions?

    If so, care to share it here?

     

    Don’t have too much fun without me! Happy New Year, my dear Glibs!

     

     

  • Wednesday Afternoon Links

    Hey guys, how’s life? I assume many of us are back to work. We had a great time on NYE, but my wife had too good a time, so she took her first parenting sick day of 2019 yesterday. But it got her at least one day of not drinking closer to a dry January goal. How are your resolutions coming?

    Goddam, Florida Man will shoot you and your dogs. If they were chihuahuas, they deserved it.

    He also believes in “celebratory gunfire”. Shooting a dead bad guy again is acceptable celebratory gunfire, negligently discharging your firearm into the air is stupid and dangerous.

    Scientists “find” dark matter by… assuming it exists and mapping galaxy rotation. Uh, no. You found that gravity was consistent, and that Newtonian-Einstein gravity still can’t be explained on a cosmic scale without the assumed, unobservable mass.

    Harry Reid is dying. Quit filibustering, Harry. Godspeed.

     

    My new year’s resolution.

  • We Interrupt this Transmission

    Recorded from Durham University institute for Computational Cosmology—March 2018

    “This is absolutely amazing.”  Kegerreirris exclaimed.

    He raced through the lab shouting happily as he finally found evidence to support his theory of Uranus.

    ”Cue the Ron Paul GIF.  ITS HAPPENING!”

    He continued running and slapped an unsuspecting graduate student in her supple behind.  Recognizing his mistake, he quickly to found a male grad student and slapped his behind as well.

    ”What are you doing professor?” The female grad student asked incredulously.

    “Um…Never mind that!  I finally solved the riddle to Uranus!”  Kegerreirris shouted.  Echoing through the crowded hallway.

    “My what?”  The female grad student asked.

    “Uranus!”  Kegerreirris replied.

    ”Her’s may be, but there is no riddle with mine.”  The male grad student said.  Writing his Twitter handle on Kegerreirris‘ hand.

    ”You best be very careful about what you say next, professor.”  The female grad student said, while clutching the electronic #metoo alert hanging from a chain around her neck.

    “We performed a series of hydrodynamic simulations from a deep impact to Uranus.  The data suggests the impact to Uranus is the reason Uranus tumbles instead of rotate.”  Kegerreirris explained.

    ”It doesn’t tumble you sicko!”  The female grad student began to hit the #metoo alert around her neck furiously.  “You all saw what this member of the patriarchy did!”

    “No seriously.  A deep impact on Uranus is the reason it has such an unusual movement.  None like any other body in the solar system.  I have a graphic here on my phone.  See?”

    View post on imgur.com

    She began hitting the button on the #metoo alert as fast as she could.

    ”Alright I think we’ve all seen enough.”  A man in a cheap suit walked out from a shadowy corner of the lab.  He had a slightly tallow tint to the baggy skin hanging around his neck.  Smoking a cigarette in one hand.  “Nothing here happened.  You didn’t see anything in the simulations, that guy didn’t just flirt with you, and this guy didn’t walk up and slap your fat ass.”

    ”Of course he did.  He did it in front of everyone.  He was about to rape me!”  The female grad student began shouting over the cigarette smoking man.

    ”Okay, you need to slow your roll there, sugar tits.  The only thing that got raped was Uranus.”  He began again.

    ”Exactly!  He wanted to—“

    The pudgy, cigarette smoking man reached into his sweaty jacket and pulled out a TASER and stuck the prongs into her thigh.

    She stopped yelling.

    ”You know, they say Kegelciser—“

    “Kegerreirris.  Dr. Kegerreirris.”

    ”I don’t like that name.  You’re now Dr. Kegelciser unless you fail to keep this quiet.  Now as I was saying.  They say you need to aim for the a large muscle group.  Its always the chunky ones that make it difficult to determine that.  Is the thigh meaty, flabby, a bit of both—mmmm.”  He took a long drag of the cigarette and put it out on the laboratory floor.  “You are going to do something for me.  You see your research comes dangerously close to something we’ve been tracking for a long time.  You found evidence it can rape planet sized objects.  We need you to keep this quiet or I am going to have to take you back to the National Archives with sugar tits over here.  Capice?”

    ”So what do I say happened to Uranus?”  Kegerreirris asked.

    ”The world cannot know of the truth behind SPACE SMITH.  Just say it was a rock or something.”

     

    End Recoding ring

  • Wednesday Morning Links

    One of you Glibs stayed at our house last night.  I won’t say who but I’ll give you a hint, my eldest daughter called him “weird”.

     

    It’s still slow news season so the news stories are still sparse, but as always, I’ll do my best to dig up some for you.

     

    According to the Census Bureau, the Blue State Exodus continues apace.

     

    Moar shutdown drama!

     

    U still mad establishment Republicans? Ya, u still mad.

     

     

    Kanye is back on the Trump Train again!

     

     

    Democrats still have a sad.

     

     

     

    New CA laws going into effect in 2019.

     

     

    That’s all I got for today.  I’ll leave you with a song and then go bid adieu to my Glib guest.

  • Jewsday Tuesday: Fake New Year

    Because of the serial weekly reading of sedrahs from the Torah, sometimes the timing gets a bit weird. I mean, here we are in the dead of winter, just finishing the goyish New Year’s, and the reading this week is the Moses origin story, which really belongs in springtime when Pesach rolls around. I blame Trump.

    In any case, this week’s sedrah is euphoniously called Parshot Shemot (or Shemos if you’re old-school Ashkenazi). And action-packed it certainly is- this isn’t one of those sedrahs that’s stuffed with arcane legalistics, there’s shit happening. And most of it is Moses’s pre-bugout stuff. It’s the first sedrah in Shemot, aka Exodus, and I will note that “Shemot” means “names.” The Jew names for the books of the Torah are generally taken from the first significant words in the book, which in this case are “v’ayleh shemot.” Now, you might ask, why didn’t we call the book “V’ayleh”? Because that means “and these are…” which isn’t as cool as “names.” Anyway, the referred-to names are the guys from Joseph’s family who came over to Egypt (which we Jews laughingly call “Mitzrayim”) during the good years there: Reuven, Levi, Simeon, Judah, Issachar, Zebulon, Benjamin, Dan, Naftali, Asher, Gad, and Rudolph, who had a BIG red nose and guided his brethren on the right path to get to Egypt.

    Most of the story of Shemot will be familiar to anyone who has seen The Ten Commandments, so rather than rehash the stories of Charlton Heston and Yul Brynner, I’ll point out a couple bits that didn’t make it onto the silver screen. We all know that the Pharaoh died and the new Pharaoh didn’t like Jews very much. Interestingly, his objection (if you believe the Torah) was that the Jews outnumbered the Egyptians. Now unless the Jews were even more prolific than rabbits, this claim seems a bit dubious. But it’s in the Bible, so it has to be true, right? The Pharaoh then did what any good politician would- noting that if you subsidize something, you get more of it, and if you tax something, you get less of it, he levied (pun!) a tax on the Jews, and created the Egyptian version of the IRS as an enforcement mechanism. Apparently, this was insufficient, so the Egyptians enslaved the Jews. You might ask yourself, “How does this make sense? If the Jews outnumbered the Egyptians and were more powerful, how could they be enslaved?” And you’re going to Hell for even asking that question. The answer is not explicitly given, but my hypothesis is that the Egyptian Jews, like American Jews, tended to be strongly progressive. So they succumbed to guilt, totally unable to bring themselves to resist an onslaught from Egyptian shvartzes.

    The Pharisees, of course, did their usual tortured logic to explain things- using some remarkable reasoning, they deduced that every Jew lady had 12 kids. I’m not even going to try to walk through this, it’s as stupid as 9 lawyers in black dresses deciding that raising wheat for your own family falls under the interstate commerce clause of the constitution. I’ll go with my Progressive theory.

    Another bit that didn’t make it into the DeMille epic was Yahweh equipping Moses with miracle stuff to prove he was on a mission from God. Yeah, the movie showed the old staff-into-snake sleight of hand, but in the original, Moses’s miracle was putting his hand into his shirt, then pulling it out to show that he suddenly had a major case of leprosy. Once the gross-out sunk in, he would then put his hand back into the shirt and pull it out, now un-diseased. This was a cool enough trick that Moses was a winner in Penn & Teller’s Fool Me, and got him the Vegas invite.

    Of course, the movie DID have the whole Burning Bush thing, but… really, in the universe of miracles, that was a pretty low grade one.

    Another bit that kind of glided by in the movie was Yahweh’s direction for the Jews to loot Egypt on their way out.

    Each woman shall borrow from her neighbor and from the dweller in her house silver and gold objects and garments, and these you shall put on your sons and on your daughters, and you shall empty out Egypt.

    Reparations! I’m getting a bit more sympathetic to Pharaoh.

    Yahweh, as usual, continues to be an asshole. As Moses and his family head back to Egypt to confront Pharaoh, Yahweh inexplicably tries to kill Moses, apparently because he hadn’t cut off the end of Junior’s wee-wee. Mrs. Moses does so, throws the bloody tip at Yahweh, and that’s the last we ever hear about this unfortunate incident.

    Jews are strange. But you know the rest of the story, lots of heart-hardening and then Plagues. But those come next week.

    I’ll wind this up with a passage from the Haftorah. Reminder: the Haftorah is a reading from the later books that somehow is supposed to relate to the Torah portion. Confusingly, the Sephardic and Ashkenazi Jews have different Haftorah selections each week. This is from the Ashkenazi one:

    Woe is to the crown of the pride of the drunkards of Ephraim and the young fruit of an inferior fig is the position of his glory, which is at the end of a valley of fatness, crushed by wine…These, too, erred because of wine and strayed because of strong wine; priest and prophet erred because of strong wine, they became corrupt because of wine; they went astray because of strong wine, they erred against the seer, they caused justice to stumble.

    For all tables were filled with vomit and ordure, without place.

    Pretty much describes our New Year’s Eve.

     

  • Glibertarian Search Engine Survey

    Introduction

    Much has been made in social media and political class about potential biases within the algorithims of commercial internet search engines.  At this point in history, anyone with a smart phone now has internet access nearly anywhere signal is available.  Given the ubiquity of the internet, the idea that everyone has the Library of Alexandria within a device that can fit within a shirt pocket is no small feat for humanity—but how does one search through mountains of information, and misinformation?  Enter the search engine.

    This article attempts to examine the question of ideological biases within commercial internet search engines, and do so in as academic, and objective a manner as possible.  Given the platform is a standard internet blog, it is understood this format may be offputting to some, perhaps even arrogant to others.  Objectivity, however is the goal, thus the format.

    If commercial internet search engines frame results designed to suit a particular ideology, then the results of identical controversial statements between various internet search engines will fit a pattern for each internet search engine provider, in an observable manner.

    Literature Review

    On 6 September 2018 GovPredict published a review of known political donations made by Alphabet Inc.  This corporation is the parent company of Google, the largest search engine by an overwhelming margin.  They concluded what many assumed:  90% of Alphabet’s employees that made a political contribution, did so to a Democrat candidate, or to an organization typically identified as beign sympathetic to the Democrat Party.  Given GovPredict can be accused of being merely a review by a small, uncredentialed blog:  in 2011 CBS News reported similar findings about Google’ political contributions.

    Because of this, the assumption is that engineers at Google will tune their algorithms in a manner to suit their biases, wittingly or unwittingly.  This is hardly a new accusation made towards Google, as this article by Business Insider from 2014 suggests.  This is an accusation often made by right of center political groups.  Who claim information presented by Google does not incorporate right of center interpretation of current events, ideas, and even basic facts that provide evidence of the merits of their ideas.  The search results are designed to bury information that may lead a neutral observer to conclude in a manner consistent with left of center biases.

    Interestingly, this accusation was presented as having merit by The Guardian on 6 September 2018, USA Today on 10 September 2018, and even previously by Slate on 7 December 2015.  While USA Today can be considered politically moderate in it’s content, neither Slate nor The Guardian are publications considered to be right of center.

    On 4 December 2018, a competing internet search engine, DuckDuckGo, explained how Google’s search algorithms can influence the presented search results by what they refer to as a filter bubble: 

    Put simply, it’s the manipulation of your search results based on your personal data. In practice this means links are moved up or down or added to your Google search results, necessitating the filtering of other search results altogether. These editorialized results are informed by the personal information Google has on you (like your search, browsing, and purchase history), and puts you in a bubble based on what Google’s algorithms think you’re most likely to click on.

    The filter bubble is particularly pernicious when searching for political topics. That’s because undecided and inquisitive voters turn to search engines to conduct basic research on candidates and issues in the critical time when they are forming their opinions on them. If they’re getting information that is swayed to one side because of their personal filter bubbles, then this can have a significant effect on political outcomes in aggregate.

    In simpler terms, Google does not present search results to suit their biases; the search results are intended to produce results that suit the user’s bias.  If one never seeks opinions that differ from his or her own, one will never understand any one political issue beyond their own bias.  This can lead to user’s simply viewing interpretations of current events, ideas, and even basic facts that provide evidence of the merit of their ideas, that only confirm their own opinions.

    This study by DuckDuckGo presents findings that appear to correspond to one conducted by The Wall Street Journal during the 2012 presidential election.  Here it was observed personalized results were provided for serch queries including the name Obama but not those with the name Romney.  Google did provide an explanation why this was the case, and cited the number of searches queries that included Obama simply outnumbered those that included Romney.  Personalized results may not be available for the latter due to lack of context in previous searches.

    In the interest of full disclosure, the research for this Literature Review, was done with the assistance of the DuckDuckGo internet search engine.

    Methodology

    A small number of subjects volunteered to search identical terms in three internet search engines.  The three search engines chosen for this review:

    The group of volunteers include the author of this article, with a total number of 7.  To act as a control for individual biases between the group of volunteers, all of the volunteers for this study identify themselves politically as classical liberals, or in modern parlance, libertarians.  Why libertarians?  Libertarianism as a philosophy is neither right nor is it left.  It is centered on recognition of individual rights.  Often where libertarians agree on certain issues with the political right or the political left, it is from the viewpoint of the guarantee of individual rights rather than the fickle political justifications of the day.  While choosing a group of libertarians specifically may imply bias towards libertarian leaning search results, the nature of the philosphy transcending both sides of the political divide is indeed a control.

    Because any individual classical liberal/libertarian may have particular preferences towards where they find informaton on the internet and what search engine they use, another control in the search queries was added.  None of the search queries are political in nature, however all of them are controversial.  The following five statements were searched between the aforementined search engines:

    • Deep dish pizza is not pizza
    • The Beatles are overrated
    • Butt implants are fake butts for fake people
    • Coke is better than Pepsi
    • Bolivian Air Force pilots cannot avoid mountains

    Each volunteer was provided with a Microsoft Excel spreadsheet, and simply asked to copy and paste the top five search results that are not advertisements for each of the above five queries.  All returned their completed spreadsheets by 14 December 2018.

    Individual search results were identified with the first character in the internet search provider’s name (i.e. G is for Google), and by a numeral.  The numeral is intended to correspond to an individual search result, therefore G1, D1, and B1 for example, are the same search result identified on all three internet search engines.  It is in this way, a unique result can be identified should a particular search engine produce a unique result.

    Due to the convenience of the population size, further analysis on how these results are presented in order for each user will also be observed.

    Results

    The following are the results in tabular form:

    Conclusion

    When put in tabluar form, one can see the results for many of the queries are similar.  Where they differ however is the order they are presented.   One issue with the methodology is the limited scope of the results recorded, it is possible the search results are more or less the same when etended to the first page of results and beyond.

    A noticable feature of the results, is the Google results cover a smaller spread. For example, for the first query, Deep Dish Pizza is not Pizza, Google only covers results 1-8 between seven people.  The other two search engines however, cover a spread of 1-12.  More concerning, are the order of results are nearly identical across all users.

    Another thing that can be noticed is in the fourth query, Butt Implants are fake Butts for Fake People.  If one were investegating this subject on Google, he or she would need to wait untiil the third search result (47) to find a search result corresponding with either of the other search engines.  It is obvious this is a meaningless subject, however given the limited attention span of the average American for a subject more meaningful the third result can be significant.  If one wants to question the result—so what if Google appears to have identical results between users on a search related to prothetic devices for the human posterior?  The better question is, what if Google has identical results between users for a subject that actually matters?

    While this on the surface it might appear DuckDuckGo’s claims have some merit; one can see their results cover a wider spread between users and much greater variance in the order presented when compared to Google.  That said, the results are not all that different.  In some cases one can see the same “filter bubble” DuckDuckGo accuses Google of presenting to its customers, within DuckDuckGo’s results.  It would therefore appear the search engines do indeed present an observable pattern in the results.  What that pattern is, if it can be considered a bias, and how it affects the user is not something that can be quantified here.