The Glibening, Part Nine: A Stranger in a Strange Land

Previously…

Ramesh came to a Tee in the corridor. He stopped, looked and listened. Identical corridor in each direction. From the right he heard a muffled chorus of screeching, from the left he heard peppy Latin music.

The choice was obvious.

Today’s Story…

Ramesh turned left and once he was around the corner shrunk up against the wall. He pulled out his phone and found it had powered itself off. He hit the power button and nothing happened. He could have sworn he had decent charge. He tried again. Nothing.

Here he was locked in an underground dungeon with a kinky gay Troll who could punch a dent in a metal door. His NYPD escort didn’t know where he was. His phone was dead. He was being used as a drug mule. At least he could skate on the last part if he ever got out of here.

Ramesh prayed silently – first to his Hindu grandparents’ multi-limbed gods, then to his mother’s crucified god, and for good measure recited the Bene Gesserit Litany Against Fear.

I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”

He began to feel better. On the positive side there was a good chance he could pass as a respected member of the community, although that carried its own risks. Today seemed to be some kind of special costume-wearing day which provided further cover. And then there was the weed which could be used to explain strange behavior, and win friends.

Ramesh heard a commotion from behind. He turned around and saw three men and a handcart approaching him. The commotion resolved into an annoying electronic beeping “preet, preet, preet,” followed by a voice announcement “Gangway, Gangway. Please move aside so that your WartCo technicians can bring you the finest service anywhen.”

The cart contained a large spool of thick cable. The foremost crewman was an older athletic man who stood on the front of the cart turning the spool and yelling back at the other crewmen, two chubby younger guys. The crew were all wearing white coveralls and hardhats, each bearing a logo consisting of a stylized “W” inside a circle. The second crewman was pushing the cart from the rear. The last crewman was taping the cable to the floor with a rolling device on a stick.

Manually laying floor tape is one of the most tedious, time-consuming and painful jobs many of us have to deal with. But with the high cost of a trip or fall, safety has to be a priority. Finally, there is a better way: introducing the GaffGun™. No longer do you have to be on your knees or use excessive tape to make your cables secure.

Dammit Corey, put some muscle into it,” yelled the chief to the crewman working the taping machine. “And keep that cable as close to the wall as she’ll go. Steady Brian,” he said ducking down to avoid a light fixture, “and a warning would be nice.”

Brian smirked, and pantomimed jerking the cart sideways which the chief ignored.

Ramesh decided to ask for directions. “Hey, how do I…”

The crew chief shook his head. “Sorry Sir, we’re just techs. Your site POC should have all your destination info. Someone named Fist of Etiquette”

Corey giggled.

Remember lads, we’re here to lay cable not to judge our clients.”

Yeah, we all know whose cable you’d like to lube up and conduitize,” observed Brian, aping the posture and gait of a Troll.

Shut your piehole and push the cart. His Growlr pic is totally hot, but it’s a decade and a hundred pounds out of date.” The WartCo crew receded down the corridor.

Something really big was about to happen at Thought! Magazine, at least with the commenters. Ramesh wondered how many of the handles he had seen while lurking were, well, whatever these people were. Was this somehow related to the music video? Thought! had the most notoriously rabid, snarky and informed comment section in the political arena. And it was well-known that there was no love lost between the commenters and staff. The boss had asked Ramesh to look for a weak point that could be exploited to further alienate the two sides from one another, but it appeared that was happening on its own.

Hello,” said a close by voice.

Ramesh shrieked and started. Standing next to him was a man wearing a red and black checked flappy hat, matching flannel shirt, and loose-fitting jeans semi tucked into unlaced work boots.

Hey, sorry about that. I didn’t hear you come up.”

Good one, Doc.”

So apparently he did look like Doctor Bombay.

Hey, I’m glad you’re back, eh. I’m headed over to Mario’s. He’s taking this really hard. Can you spare a second to help cheer him up?”

Sure, I need to drop off something from Godwin, anyway,” said Ramesh as he started walking again.

Thank God, he’s frantic. I wonder how long he can make that last? He’s going to Holland, but decades before the green cafes – if they even exist in that timeline. Where are you going?”

To be a junior federal prosecutor working for Preet.”

Beauty. Wreak havoc. The Squirrels really have a hardon for him, eh?”

Sounds like.”

And speaking of whom.” The Canadian paused and opened a door which somehow Ramesh had failed to notice. On the door was a sign reading “Data Processing.”

The room contained a complicated, multi-level structure of of small ramps, chutes, hamster wheels, spinning levers with balls attached, all now silent and still – a Sciuriac, an antique Indian squirrel-powered computer which used acorns to encode and store data. The Indian Museum of Digital Computing had an exhibit with part of a unit and a brief film loop of countless squirrels running to and fro along the ramps and wheels, taking acorns from the various output cups then dropping them into the various input chutes.

Let’s not leave Mario hanging,” said Ramesh.

Right. Good point.”

As they walked down the corridor the peppy Latin music started up again, and grew louder as they walked. They passed a door labelled “Men” and from around the next corner Ramesh saw a man in a black dress and low-crowned, broad brimmed hat approaching, as he got closer Ramesh saw the simple wooden cross on the twine around his neck, and the notched collar on whatever the dress-type garment was called – some sort of clerical outfit.

Hello, Your Holiness,” giggled the Canadian.

Hello Rufus, Heathen. I’ll pray for you both. Better get to your boy, he’s crying like the sissy bitch he is.”

Comments

212 responses to “The Glibening, Part Nine: A Stranger in a Strange Land”

  1. Spudalicious

    *whistles softly*

    That is some good dope.

  2. Yusef’s Electric Gypsy Caravan, no really

    I….. I got nuthin’

      1. Rhywun

        Hmph, started an hour ago. Too bad.

        1. straffinrun

          Well, they’re both probably locked up by now anyways.

      2. Gustave Lytton

        Truth telling with…. Dan Rather. You couldn’t make this shit up.

        1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

          There are plenty of people, at this point, who agree, and are letting them know.

  3. straffinrun

    Thx, Tonio. These are the perfect length for my morning commute.

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      It seems more appropriate for one of your drunken “missed the last train” trips home.

      1. straffinrun

        Make it an audio file and it’s a deal.

        1. Tonio

          I’m actually thinking about that. Except I hate my voice.

          1. Florida Man

            Nobody likes their own voice

          2. That being true, there are a hell of a lot of people who don’t know how to shut up.

          3. Tulip

            It didn’t bother me when I was a professor, just when I heard recordings.

          4. Tulip

            Yeah, I sound like a muppet.

          5. Sean

            Go on…

            ?

          6. Florida Man

            Is that on your dating profile? Cuz that’s hawt.

          7. Nephilium

            Wait… so you sound like trshmnstr and Rufus? Like together?

          8. Tulip

            I am tempted to crowd source what I wrote,then I read this and, … not so much

          9. Don Escaped Texas

            really?

            will drawl for cash

  4. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Thanks Tonio!

    And I’ll take a hit of whatever it is you’re smoking.

  5. Raphael

    Quite tame in comparison to the prior episode, but I am eagerly looking forward to the building up and inevitable SHTF moment.

  6. Spudalicious

    So Rufus is a fop?

    1. I thought he was a bottom.

      Oh, you said fop, not top.

    2. Scruffy Nerfherder

      He always did strike me as a bit of a dandy.

    3. His chosen profession is Babysitting, which is a teenage girls job so…

    4. Chipwooder

      Not a Dapper Dan man?

      1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

        +1 Geographical Oddity

        Or, would it be +2 weeks?

    1. commodious spittoon

      Not celebrating journalists’ every bowel movement is making journalisming dangerous!

    2. Sir Digby (PBUH)

      I think this is the first time a POTUS has actually made me laugh.

      *Using actual humor

    3. JaimeRoberto: Gentleman, Scholar, French Tickler

      CNN will probably spend the next 24 hours wetting the bed over this.

  7. Fourscore

    “Better get to your boy, he’s crying like the sissy bitch he is.”

    Waaaay too soft spoken for the Real Pope. I know the pope guy and this ain’t him.

    1. Pope Jimbo

      Uffda. I can’t believe that you think I ever speak in anything other than dulcet tones. You are lucky it is Empathy Day, or I’d show you what real ex cathedra talk sounds like.

      1. Fourscore

        See? Now this is the real Pope, overt and threatening, the Pope we’ve come to know and… Wait, wait, I ain’t goin’ there…

  8. Sean

    Marco Rubio blinks too much.

  9. Tundra

    Hah!

    I’ve been reading during TV timeouts. It’s fucking brilliant, Tonio.

    Rufus and Jimbo makes for a perfect episode!

    1. Pope Jimbo

      That wasn’t me. I didn’t get to be Pope to wear a simple outfit.

      Nope. I want all the pomp and bling I can get my hands on.

  10. Fatty Bolger

    How an American billionaire predicted — and then profited from — the U.S. opioid epidemic

    Awful article, but some serious pushback from Yahoo commenters. Too many people benefit from this scare for it to go away quickly, but hopefully people are starting to wake up to this bullshit.

    1. Rhywun

      I wouldn’t trust Yahoo to tell me what time it is. They’ve sunk to WaPo levels.

  11. Nephilium

    I still live. May the gods above and below save me from intermittent user issues. I’ve been tied up in four hour conference calls and site visits the past two days dealing with this shite.

  12. kinnath

    Uh, dude, you’re missing the best part of that cover photo.

    1. Chafed

      Yeah. I want all of lobster girl; not just from the shoulders up.

  13. Playa Manhattan

    LOBSTER GIRL!

  14. Winston

    https://www.libertarianism.org/publications/essays/excursions/optimism-pessimism-case-herbert-spencer-part-1

    I never knew this before but Herbert Spencer’s protege was none other than the arch-Fabian Socialist Beatrice Webb!

    [Herbert] Spencer met the Potters during the 1840s, while he was in his twenties, and they became close friends. The Potter household served as a second home for Spencer, and he became especially close to Beatrice Potter. Beatrice called Spencer “the oldest and most intimate friend of the family.”

    So high was Spencer’s regard for Beatrice that he later appointed her executor of his literary estate, which meant she would control his manuscripts, letters, and unpublished papers after his death. Spencer probably hoped that Beatrice would use these papers to write his biography and carry on his work, but none of this came to pass.

    Says it all about the death of classical liberalism. Even the students of its major intellectals turn against it do much and very quickly at that.

    Oh and Beatrice’s grandfather was one of the men who sponsored the Guardian when it was first founded.

  15. Winston

    Speaking of the Guardian:

    Progressing beyond social mobility means accepting a hard truth: what makes social mobility so popular is it plays into the idea that a handful of people are deserving of greater success because they have worked hard and are preternaturally talented. Removing some barriers to their success is seen as the answer to our strict and constraining class structure. Such thinking implies that the vast bulk of the working class are stuck with low wages and a precarious financial future because they haven’t worked hard enough to free themselves. It presupposes too that the working class is something to be escaped, further stigmatising the social experience of millions across the United Kingdom, and ensuring for those supposed social “success stories” the journey into the middle classes is an endlessly lonely experience.

    Far harder is the pursuit of actual equality and justice: building a much better education system for all children. It means addressing health inequalities, and funding public health initiatives that address lower life expectancies, higher cancer and heart disease rates, higher infant mortality and suicide rates in different regions. It means making sure people have the opportunity to earn a decent wage and the right to request flexible working and better conditions.

    1. Akira

      the right to request flexible working and better conditions.

      They absolutely have this right. The fact that an employer might not grant those requests does not mean that the right is being violated, just like how a publisher declining to publish your political book does not mean that your freedom of speech is violated.

  16. Nephilium

    UCS: From the last thread, the reason that the robocalls are trying to get you to say “Yes” is so that they can then charge you for random shit. They can then use the recording of you saying yes as proof you agreed to the charges. If you fight it, you’ll usually win, but it’ll take more time. Some of the newer scams are also targeting those who automatically call back numbers that tried to call them. They call from an overseas number that looks close to a US one, and hang up after one ring. Think of a 900 number calling you and hanging up…

    1. Rhywun

      One of my fat fingers slipped the other day and I accidentally called back an obvious robo-caller. Immediately hung up. They make it non-obviously easy to do that – like just touching the number? – which ticks me off.

      1. Nephilium

        Several of the people I support have their outbound phone numbers configured incorrectly (by the customer’s request)… This has led to several of their calls to my cell phone to be flagged as Scam Likely, which means I trigger Google’s call screening service. The service is a text to speech telling the person that they’ve reached a number using a screening service from Google, and to state their name and the reason for the call. Google then tries to take that speech and display it as text (it’s not always the best at this point). Anyone who actually tries to talk (and doesn’t mention warranties, insurance, or credit card debt), I immediately accept. I’ve still had legitimate callers hang up (although I had one caller comment that he thought it was really cool that my phone did that).

        1. Rhywun

          I’m about at the point where I’ll refuse to answer an unknown number unless you email me first, give me the number you’re going to call from, and arrange an agreed time to call.

          1. Nephilium

            I can’t do that, since I forward my office phone to my cell when I’m not working in the office. So I have to answer the unknown callers any day I’m working from home. But at least I’m at the point I recognize most of the more likely area codes to call me (and the ones where they’re sending out their internal extension as their phone number).

          2. Rhywun

            Hm… good point. Yeah, I do that too. Luckily my work doesn’t require taking a lot of phone calls. Other than my boss. I’m trying to remember if AD was integrated into my phone at my last job. That would be helpful.

          3. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Are you back to work, or, I am I reading into your statement?

            If the first part, congrats, and, my condolences…

          4. Rhywun

            Nope. I should get on that.

          5. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Well, then–my apologies for bringing it up.

          6. Yup, I have voicemail for a reason.

    2. blackjack

      I always google strange numbers. Most of the time, it belongs to telemarketers and it’s obvious.

      1. Rhywun

        I didn’t know you could do that.

        1. Playa Manhattan

          You can google anything with nipples.

          1. Rhywun

            My nipples aren’t that flexible.

          2. Spudalicious

            When dealing with a keyboard, or touchpad, hard and pointy are preferred.

          3. The Bearded Hobbit

            Well played, sir!

          4. Playa Manhattan

            I think he missed it. Oh well.

          5. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Any cat fan should have spotted it immediately.

            That, or people with ceramic urns…

          6. Tejicano

            /brings up Google home page

            /types in “anything with nipples”

            /hits enter key

            /GAAHHKK!!!!

      2. Nephilium

        I don’t even bother anymore. If you didn’t leave a voice mail, and you didn’t e-mail me, it either wasn’t important, or I shouldn’t be talking to you anyways.

        1. Tulip

          Yep. Block and move on

    3. Playa Manhattan

      The Caribbean used to be a hotbed of toll phone fraud. Montserrat was the worst, IIRC.

      Never, ever dial a number with a (664) area code.

      1. Nephilium

        It doesn’t matter so much if you can send your outbound traffic out wherever you want.

      2. Florida Man

        You’re not my supervisor!

        1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

          C’mon, FM–you’re obviously waiting for the triple 6’s. You’re still set if you do follow his advice.

  17. Chipwooder

    Binnington let his team down in game 6 but he certainly is making up for it tonight. What a performance.

    1. Raston Bot

      He is in their heads.

      1. Rhywun

        Boston is definitely off their game. Sloppy.

        *shrugs* I don’t care who wins, TBH.

        1. Chipwooder

          I just want Boston to lose. That fucking city has seen enough winning in the last 15 years

          1. Rhywun

            I think your wish is about to come true.

    2. Chipwooder

      3-0 Blues…that should do it. Incredible pass by Tarasenko.

      1. Raston Bot

        4 now

        1. Rhywun

          4-1. Man, they could have at least tried to make this interesting for the neutrals.

    3. grrizzly

      As a silver lining, at least I don’t have to think which one of the Bruins would offer a retarded excuse before refusing to go to the White House.

      1. Rhywun

        Some wag commentating the USWNT during their 13-0 win yesterday said something along the lines of “If they keep this up they’ll get an invitation from the White House”. Apparently completely oblivious to the politics of the USWNT.

  18. JG43

    Lobster Girl is home!

    1. Rhywun

      What a maroon.

    2. Raphael

      Guy is having a rough time. He’s got 20 other clowns trying to out-commie him so he’s gotta keep upping his ante.

      *honk honk*

    1. kinnath

      thank you Q

  19. pan fried wylie

    from the morning thread, sorry…

    But I never was, being white, cisgendered (ie, normatively masculine), and able-bodied.

    That’s important, now that you have push up on the bus’ undercarrage to make room for white cis lesbians.

    Ouch…..
    Sounds like they constantly will need a bigger bus…

    Part bus, part monster truck. Wheels 10ft tall, kickass paintjob, and it breathes fire. Trump will be forced to pay for it as part of his eventual sentencing.

    It’s gonna be yuge.

  20. Nephilium

    Well, at least I can be sure that whoever is running Ticketmaster’s big data really is not doing a good job. The chances of my dad (in his 70’s) enjoying Social Distortion and Flogging Molly are about the same as Q deciding that A cups are where it’s at.

    1. Old Man With Candy

      I’m in my 60s and enjoy Flogging Molly, so ya never know…

  21. JG43

    Let’s go Blues!

    1. Don Escaped Texas

      the West for the win

  22. commodious spittoon

    I was told I’d soon be sharing my cubicle with a female student intern.

    Met her today. She’s in high school.

    *sad trombone*

    1. JG43

      Lights OMWC signal

      1. Raphael

        High school. Still too old for OMWC, that’s a no-go from the van-man.

    2. straffinrun

      I thought the whole point of having cubicles was so you don’t have to share them.

      1. Rhywun

        My last place had U-shaped cubicles so technically I was sharing mine with my boss. ?

        1. straffinrun

          Read that as U shaped pubicles. Hope your boss was hawt.

          1. Rhywun

            Nawt.

      2. commodious spittoon

        I’ll be an intern for at least another couple months, so I have to content myself that they’re only packing us two deep.

    3. Don Escaped Texas

      got a Pence-approved body cam?

      1. straffinrun

        Has X ray vision and mosaic at same time.

    4. Florida Man

      Ask her how she feels about feminism. That’s a nice safe opening topic.

      1. Raphael

        I see you too like to live a life of danger.

        1. Florida Man

          *points to handle*

          A-Yup.

          1. Raphael

            *cheers as a fellow Florida Man*

        1. Rhywun

          LOL

    5. JaimeRoberto: Gentleman, Scholar, French Tickler

      Are you in Virginia? If so, then it’s probably not a problem.

    1. commodious spittoon

      *takes notes*

    2. Florida Man

      I know it’s some weird knuckle under culture they have, but really 10 minutes without a knee to the nuts?

      1. commodious spittoon

        *scratches out notes*

        1. Playa Manhattan

          *buys plane tickets*

    3. Raphael

      Guy should’ve mastered the “hover hands” like the homeboy, Keanu Reeves.

    4. Gustave Lytton

      Obviously no one in the story learned the lessons of Sailor Fuku to Kikanjuu.

      Also, Hiroko Yakushimaru. Wood even more today.

      1. straffinrun

        That was filmed in the neighborhood I’m in today. Never heard of it, but with a name like “The Sailor uniform and the Machine Gun” I’ll check it out.

        1. Gustave Lytton

          Full movie
          https://youtu.be/eNUfBIqVSgI

          The title sucked me in too.

      1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

        Where you been, dawg? Getting mighty boring late in these parts…

        1. CPRM

          Worked a little later than usual. Then watched a couple shows while beering it up to rend the frustration. For said frustration see my bottom comment.

          1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Gotcha…enjoy ze brewskis

  23. Sir Digby (PBUH)

    You know, it’s always fun when you have to ready your CCH because some asshole in a “Texas Special” wants to play king of the lane for some unknown reason.

    Dude, I don’t who you are, or, what your malfunction is, but get the fuck away from me pronto.

    1. straffinrun

      Something that’s been bothering me lately: the grills on Trucks and Vans lately. They have these big ol’ badass grills. Made of plastic. It’s like a tattoo on a barista.

      1. BakedPenguin

        There are that many trucks in Japan?

        1. straffinrun

          They have the small Honda trucks and I like those things. I’m talking about Merican trucks and Japanese vans. Like this:

          https://ccsrpcma.carsensor.net/CSphoto/bkkn/021/563/U00026021563/U00026021563_001L.JPG

          1. Gustave Lytton

            My wife calls it the gaping mouth. Thinks they’re awful.

          2. BakedPenguin

            Fair enough, that is pig ugly.

          3. straffinrun

            It’s amazing the designer thought it was aesthetically appealing. Another one. My neighbor’s van. I have to see it every morning.

            https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRpr_77YRIiaoqEyzJxfenC5fFJ_Odqt11hzLEM444c0Tvj2AD5iueaCSeR

          4. Chipping Pioneer

            It’s like they put a cleft lip on a vehicle.

          5. Sir Digby (PBUH)
          6. straffinrun

            I thee what you’re thaying.

          7. Playa Manhattan

            Mean, but fair.

          8. Tejicano

            My father-in-law has that van. Needless to say we don’t see eye-to-eye on much of anything.

            Sometimes I wonder if the auto companies are just trying to see how far their market will go along with this stuff – like the tailfins of the late 1950’s.

          9. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            See….that should be turned into a Darth Vader helmet of some type. Scare the hell out of little children.

            What I was referring to seeing daily is: http://www.velocityjournal.com/images/stk/2019/761/fd2019f150extendedcab76183041_600.jpg

            Or, whatever competitors are coming up with.

          10. straffinrun

            Who lets their 4 year old boy choose their truck?

          11. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Proud Texas daddies, is my guess. Well, the ones that just gotta have that spiffy showin’-off truck.

          12. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            BTW, I may try to trademark “Proud Texas Daddies”….may make some bank when the right group comes along wanting a catchy name.

          13. straffinrun

            No offense to anyone that owns a van or truck like that BTW. Just not my style. I drive a Honda Fit FFS. Glass houses.

          14. Tejicano

            This is what I drive (like this – not the exact same car) :

            https://tinyurl.com/yyxtvxby

          15. Tejicano

            This is what I drive (like this – not the exact same car) :

            https://tinyurl.com/yyxtvxby

          16. straffinrun

            Practical. Works for me.

          17. Tejicano

            It’s also inter-cooled turbo, fuel injected (about 320 hp) and AWD. Same drive train as the Skyline. Huge amount of space in the back.

          18. straffinrun

            Didn’t read the description. I thought it was the Probox. Need bifocals when I’m on the IPhone.

          19. Rhywun

            Restlos Intercool

          20. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            What I’m finding interesting is that my original post about a potentially violent driving experience has morphed into a talk about shitty vehicle body design, and, what some of us drive.

          21. Tejicano

            The one I drive I bought used on an auction site. I paid JPY70k (about US$650) for it but I knew that was just the price for admission. Expired inspection, bad tires, sitting on a lot in Ehime prefecture. By the time I got it trucked up here and back on the road it cost me about JPY400k (US$3,700). But the custom rims that came with it were probably worth more than I paid the auction price.

          22. straffinrun

            Braving the DYI skaken? Glad it worked out.

          23. straffinrun

            Shaken Dammit.

          24. Tejicano

            Not much I can say about road rage situations – they’re pretty rare here and about the only thing I can have (which I do) in my car approximating a weapon is a Cold Steel Special Forces Shovel (https://tinyurl.com/y4fn4a3e).

            When I’m in the US I’m generally armed to greet the apocalypse – New Mexico gun laws are cool.

            Straff – I didn’t do my own inspection work, that’s why it cost so much to get the car on the road.

      2. Rhywun

        There’s a Chevy commercial here (with that beta cuck spokesperson they’ve been using for the last couple years) where some man-on-the-street literally says “That’s got a mean face on it!”

        1. Gustave Lytton

          I thought the wussiness of their spokeswuss was just in my head. Relieved to see that I’m not the only one.

          1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Isn’t he intended to be the white bread of the commercials? So that the “actual Chevy owners” can shine and make the actual ‘OMG BADAZZ KEWL!’ pitch?

          2. Rhywun

            I dunno what their thinking is but that guy bugs the hell out of me. He is so off-putting and combined with the “gotcha” angle* they use in every damn commercial… I can’t even.

            *so bad that Flo the insurance lady made fun of it in another commercial!

          3. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Well, he’s the best that Government Motors and Detroit has to offer.

      3. Sir Digby (PBUH)

        You are absolutely right. I see that every day, and it’s weird. I get the push for ‘modern’ design, but, that is bewildering.

    2. kinnath

      I am rarely online when you grace these pages.

      So is your handle related to Sir Kenelm Digby?

      1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

        Heh. No–and I had to look him up. But, I’m that much more educated, so, thank you.

        It’s mostly him

        The (PBUH) is….

        It’s a spur-of-the-moment thing, stemming from a few weeks back. Heroic answered someone’s question about how to tell if someone is a genuine ??? (I can’t be arsed to do a search) with a very glib (DRINK!) answer like, “I think it’s followed by Peace Be Upon Him (PBUH).”

        You’re the 2nd glib this week to ask. Huh….

      2. Sir Digby (PBUH)

        Also–I thought you were on relatively late, usually. I picked the wrong day to stop sniffing glue….

  24. Ownbestenemy

    So the president admits he’d listen to dirt from a foreign entity about an opponent and the media is going ape shit.

    1. Rhywun

      I don’t know if he’s baiting them or not any more.

      1. Ownbestenemy

        I think its opening the curtain and ripping the mask off from what every politician does. At least that is my hope.

        They, including Trump, all do it but one side will decry it as a major revelation.

        1. Chafed

          I know any of them would do it but he’s not helping himself. He is walking up to the line of inviting foreign interference.

          1. Ownbestenemy

            Agreed. I know what I would do. Confess and then open up all records, pack up and leave a fake fowarding address.

    2. straffinrun

      Trump should start trolling from a different angle. Tweet something like, “It’s not true the socialism killed a billion people!” Get the media to start haggling over the numbers.

      1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

        haggling over the numbers

        LOL. I think that would actually work.

        1. straffinrun

          It’s basically what he’s already doing. I mean, it’s just a matter of degrees how crooked Hillary is.

      2. Ownbestenemy

        Only if its H&H doing the tweets

    3. KSuellington

      Next thing he is going to say that he would pay a foreigner for dirt on his opponent. And then use that to get a FISA court to agree to a wiretap on his opponent’s campaign.

      1. Playa Manhattan

        That’s crazy talk. Nobody would ever do that.

        1. Rhywun

          I can only imagine that Orange is saving that bomb for the impeachment proceedings. Or a debate.

  25. CPRM

    Lawd, I forgot how fucking frustrating just installing a damn program in linux can be.

    1. Rhywun

      Oh come on – “make install”. Easy peasy!

      Except when it isn’t.

      1. CPRM

        Yeah, no. For this program, there are conflicting documents on the install procedure, you have to change setting for other programs through the terminal, create multiple executables (which the code is copy and paste, but not explained in a way that’s easy to grock for someone like me who hasn’t used linux in a decade) I finally have the program installed, but not running yet, the terminal threw out extra commands I needed to enter after a reboot which I failed to see until I had already said to execute the reboot. I’m pushing the clocked time working on this project so I just saidfuck it, I’ll deal with it next time I come in. (I’m not in IT, this is just a side project to get the programs in house before they are deployed system wide, so we can play with it before the entire system runs on it.)

        1. Rhywun

          Say no more… been there a few times. MacOS is a Unix so a lot of stuff I play around with proceeds in a similar fashion.

          1. Rhywun

            Never change, Hollywood.

          2. Gustave Lytton

            RIP SGI.

    2. Chafed

      I’ll never be technocool but stuff like this makes me a moderately satisfied windows user.

    1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

      Ahh…Netpocalypse. I remember communicating with people, in writing, in almost instantaneous fashion. Boy, those were the days.

    2. CPRM

      I didn’t say anything on account of being dead for the past year.

      1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

        C, please tell me you are working on something, merch-wise, in the vein of what Rhy said below.

        1. CPRM

          I dunno, Rhy just Trademarked it. I don’t wanna have to lawyer up.

          1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Ughh….profit-sharing.

    3. Rhywun

      Bernie ’20 – Wrong About Absolutely Everything™

      1. straffinrun

        *except about the allure of free shit

          1. straffinrun

            You guys are taxing my eyes tonight. *Focuses*. Yep, that’ll do.

          2. Donation Not Taxation

            Is that a “double vision tax on people with more than one eye?”

    4. Chafed

      That is a treasure trove of lunacy.

      1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

        And, it could, still, feasibly happen. People beg for all sorts of rule in their lives.

  26. SP

    Thank you for preserving the Glib history, Tonio!

    1. CPRM

      personally, I can’t make heads nor tails of these tomes. It’s good other folk enjoy them though.

      1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

        I hate to say it, but #MeToo. I wasn’t even aware of this until….what, last week? Something like that. Yeah, yeah–I’m here for the exchanges.

      2. CPRM

        I being the type of aspie I am, would much rather read the factual account from the front lines of the split, seeing as I was a lurker who only knew bits and pieces. Hell, if I got enough good facts and anecdotes and accompanying video or photo stuff to use, I could even do a mini docu about it.

        1. robc

          Cavanaugh left, reason went to hell, sloopy’s mom got dissed, everyone left, the end.

  27. Tejicano

    I’m supposed to be having a phone conference with work today (working from home). Half the day is gone and the time isn’t fixed yet.

    I’d rather be at the gym if I’m not getting anything work related done today.

    1. CPRM

      Time to open up that pornhub tab, since Q isn’t here, huh?

      1. Tejicano

        With my kind of luck I’d be in the middle of that and the sticky note over my camera would fall off as I accidently answer that call from the office.

        1. CPRM

          And they would be glad you were so happy to see them!

          1. Tejicano

            Actually, we have some workers installing a window frame and my wife is hovering around the place. Another reason I’d rather be elsewhere.

  28. Playa Manhattan

    It’s 63 out now. I guess I’ll turn off the air conditioner.

    1. CPRM

      Your thermostat doesn’t do that?

    2. Rhywun

      Wat? I thought it’s been cool there?

      *fingers crossed, haven’t needed AC yet*

    3. Gustave Lytton

      Still close to 70 here. Luckily the power company’s next overnight outage is tomorrow night.

  29. Gustave Lytton

    So I noticed that the new ac unit has a big flammable refrigerant warning. Strange I thought, I don’t ever remember seeing those before.

    Sure enough.

    https://www.ashrae.org/news/ashraejournal/preparing-for-flammable-refrigerants-ahead-of-industry-changes

    Fucking warmistas are finding yet another way to unimprove peoples lives. I’m about three drinks away from wanting to see every last one of them, the bag Nazis, the single use plastics assholes including the straw kid, all strung up by their intestines without the use of opioids.

    1. Rhywun

      December 12, 2107

      I guess there’s time to adjust.

      Or something.

    2. Ownbestenemy

      But does it have known chemicals to cause cancer? If it does, fear not, Biden has you covered