Wednesday Afternoon Links

Happy Wednesday, y’all. Or as I like to call it: Five hours of meeting day. Don’t worry, my team still expects eight hours of productive work, so… I guess we’re all going to be disappointed at the end of the day. How the heck are each and every one of YOU?

Someone has figured out regulatory capture and its negative effects.

Me and Gizmodo agree 100% on this. Bitcoin is entirely manipulated and worthless as a wealth store or inflation hedge.

Hey guys, big surprise, the government-backed Space Launch System is basically still vaporware, but Elon Musk’s rocket might save the day.

Anyone got a CRISPR machine I could borrow?

Here’s a little something for when the edibles kick in.

 

Comments

571 responses to “Wednesday Afternoon Links”

  1. Juvenile Bluster

    How the fuck is it only Wednesday? This week is dragging.

    1. Well, it’s the day after Tuesday and the day before Thursday, so…

      1. We’re on vacation. My wife was just lamenting that it’s Wednesday, and the week is passing far too quickly. I guess, like Einstein said, it’s all relative depending on your perspective.

  2. Yusef drives a Kia

    The SLShas always been political slush, nothing more,

    1. Tonio

      Boondoggle. Guaranteed income for space contractors.

  3. Shpip

    One Day There May Be a Drug to Turbocharge the Brain. Who Should Get It?

    /shyly raises hand

    1. SugarFree

      It’s called Adderall and they only let a few people here and there have it because of the stupid drug war.

      1. R C Dean

        I thought it was ethanol, available OTC in a wide variety of concentrations and flavors.

        1. Not Adahn

          +1 drink of philosophers

        2. Chafed

          I’d like a prescription.

  4. Scruffy Nerfherder

    If there is a drug that can enhance brain performance and extend cognitive capabilities, I’m all over it. The bioethicists can go fuck themselves.

    1. Mad Scientist

      Absolutely this.

    2. The job of an ethicist is to come up with rationalizations for things normal people find morally repugnant.

    3. jesse.in.mb

      The bioethicists can go fuck themselves.

      That’ll require a totally different type of enhancement.

  5. The Late P Brooks

    Is it just my imagination, or has there been a series of chemical explosions/fires in Houston? What gives?

    1. Sloopy’s been eating too many beans.

    2. Mad Scientist

      And where is Sloopy!?

    3. KibbledKristen

      Like, two in the last month, IIRC.

    4. Brasidas

      That’s been fun.

      One of them closed down my Houston warehouse and top selling store. The ship channel was closed, so I’ve got vital raw materials sitting out in the gulf.

      1. R C Dean

        vital raw materials sitting out in the gulf

        Can’t they just throw the bales overboard and they will float to shore?

    5. Not Adahn

      it seems to be cyclical, depending on which generation of Formosa Chemical owned plants have reached EoL.

  6. Count Potato

    “To be clear, Bitcoin is absolutely worthless by any real measure. It’s fake money that’s about as practical to use in the real world as Monopoly bills.”

    As opposed to what, government currency?

    “Bitcoin is backed by nothing and requires tremendous amounts of energy to mine using computers. As it becomes more difficult to mine, it saps more and more energy, causing millions of tons of carbon dioxide to be pumped into the atmosphere and accelerating climate change. Bitcoin is little more than a speculator’s death cult at this point.”

    As opposed to the people who believe in climate change?

    1. robc

      a webcomic replaced their ads last year with crypto mining. They had enough site visitors mining to ditch the ads. Some people were upset because of the environmental impact. The site owner was able to show that the previous ad serving used more energy than the mining did.

    2. Drake

      A picture worth a thousand words or whatever the Venezuelan currency is.

      1. mexican sharpshooter

        Bolivar. Its called the Bolivar.

        1. Mad Scientist

          At this point, they should call it the picovar.

          1. mexican sharpshooter

            Nadavar

            Let’s TM that!

  7. robc

    Bitcoin article is stupid. Sure it “bottomed out” at $3400, but if you got in at 37 cents, who cares?

    Note: I did not get in at 37 cents.

    Actually, I might have, I won a few microbitcoins playing bitcoin poker before the site got shut down and I never transferred my tiny amount of btc out that might have been worth as much as $20 or so at the peak.

    A friend of mine was regularly playing 1/2 btc heads up games.

    1. I almost got in at $12, but I didn’t want to waste $100 that I could spend on booze instead.

    2. R C Dean

      I seriously thought about getting 50 or 100 of them when it was around $20. I didn’t.

      I did buy several at an average price of around, I think, $900. Sold half when it doubled, basically forgot about it until the big bubble in 2017, when I sold all but one.

      If I had gotten 50 at $20, I probably would have sold half at $1,000 for a $25K gain, and the rest at around $15K for a $375K gain, which probably would have advanced my retirement until . . . shit, right about now.

      *goes back to proofing redlined physician policy manual*

      1. BakedPenguin

        Yeah, you wanna indulge in invest shaming? I thought about buying Amazon @ $15 a share in 1999. Fifteen dollars a share.

        And didn’t. Top that for bad moves.

        1. Spudalicious

          I did. And sold it at $42. I bought Apple at $12. And sold it at $29.

          1. Spudalicious

            Oh, and I passed on MicroSoft at $4, because I thought pc’s were a fad.

          2. BakedPenguin

            Yeah, can’t top that.

          3. deadhead

            I know a woman who worked for MITS, back when Microsoft was in Albuquerque. Bill Gates liked her work so much he tried to poach her, but he couldn’t really pay her a decent salary, so he offered her stock.

            No Bill, I want a real job.

            .

          4. Spudalicious

            Oof.

        2. DrOtto

          I bought Priceline under $2.00 a share right after 9/11, sold 6 mos later at 6.00

          1. DrOtto

            Dammit, I didn’t finish typing that. Long story short, I should have held on a little longer…

    3. I had a grand plan that I was going to buy a bunch of stock in BP when it hit its low point during the oil spill. I figured the stock was bottoming and in a few years the American public would have moved on and it would slowly rise back up to standard level. But instead I used that $1k to fund the wedding hall. I made two bad decisions that day. I’m now single and poor.

  8. The Other Kevin

    She and her colleagues also bred healthy mice to make extra Klotho. They did better than their fellow rodents on learning mazes and other cognitive tests.

    While we’re all distracted by the possibility of AI computers taking over the world, the Super Mice will make their move.

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      If Douglas Adams turns out to have been correct on this matter, I’m going to laugh heartily.

    2. kinnath

      I want in on the trials before my brain goes bad.

      1. Tonio

        ^This

      2. robc

        Based on family history, I need to start taking it about now.

        1. Scruffy Nerfherder

          I’m sorry man, but I think it’s too late already.

          1. robc

            You and my wife both think so.

          2. Scruffy Nerfherder

            Plot twist, I am your wife.

            Now get your sorry ass back to work.

      3. robc

        The other solution is nano brain plaque vacuums.

        I think Klotho is a better bet.

      4. topnotchtoledo

        What does hiking have to do with any of this? Ohh, trials.
        /signs up as well

    3. Scruffy Nerfherder

      PEOPLE OF EARTH, I AM KLOTHO, GOD EMPEROR MOUSE

      KNEEL BEFORE ME

    4. antisthenes

      Narf

      1. Mad Scientist

        To prove their mousy worth
        They’ll overthrow the Earth

        1. Spudalicious

          There once was a super mouse from Nantucket…

  9. PBRstreetgang

    I found a dead, decapitated rabbit in my yard this morning. The “attack” actually woke me up around 2 am, though I didn’t’ realize at the time it was a rabbit getting eviscerated. I live really close to Philadelphia, so this has never happened before. Long way of asking, what killed it? I’m thinking owl, but friend suggested a fox.

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      Satanists, of course

      1. Scruffy Nerfherder

        Or maybe Brainiac Mice

        1. PBRstreetgang

          Hadn’t considered Brainiac Mice. Could be.
          Also, Braniac Mice would be a good name for a minor league baseball team.

    2. Mad Scientist

      Common house cats can do incredible damage to rabbits.

      1. Tonio

        ^This. A friend’s cat was forever bringing in dead/dying rabbits and leaving them in her tub.

      2. PBRstreetgang

        Would a house cate take the head/top half with them and leave the bottom and guts strewn all over the place? I honestly don’t know, cats are killing machines so I guess it wouldn’t suprise me.

        1. It would surprise me if the rabbit were decapitated in an encounter with a cat. Cats tend to be much more precise when killing, and they dismember the prey after it stops fighting back. (not necessarily after it is dead, though)

          1. Oops, missed that you saw it the next morning. Definitely could be a cat, then. I get all sorts of decapitated woodland creatures at all the doorways to my house from the cats.

      3. blackjack

        It was the Butler in the library with a candlestick.

        1. PBRstreetgang

          A library in Philly? Dude come on, try to be serious.

          1. Enough About Palin

            It’s the name of a bar.

          2. Not Adahn

            I’m pretty sure there’s one in every college town.

      4. One of my first real life lessons was my cat bringing baby bunnies back from a nest it found and eating them one by one next to our front porch.

    3. Tonio

      Fox, coyote, bobcat, owl. Also possibly feral dog or cat.

    4. RBS

      Pictured: attackerthe

      1. PBRstreetgang

        Not sure about the Phanatic, but definitely could’ve been Gritty!

    5. robc

      Neighborhood cat.

    6. Tundra

      I live really close to Philadelphia,…

      Thoughts and prayers, dude.

      Prolly a fox, coyote, or feral kitty.

      1. Scruffy Nerfherder

        Why not a cougar?

        1. Tonio

          Ha! They generally stay in the mountains and wilderness areas, although a few years back there was one sighted near the DC beltway. And yes, many Chardonnay jokes were made.

        2. PBRstreetgang

          You don’t want to be on the business end of a Philadelphia Cougar….

          1. Mad Scientist
      2. Mad Scientist

        A wild animal would have eaten it, not just decapitated it. This was done by a creature that wasn’t hungry, just murderous.

        1. Scruffy Nerfherder

          See my link directly above

        2. Tundra

          Coyotes are assholes. Brooks mentioned owls – that could be a good guess, too.

        3. Tonio

          The head is the least meaty part, so given the choice you take the body.

          1. Not Adahn

            Bears think that brains are especially tasty. When there are enough salmon, bears will will swipe out salmon, take a single bite out of the cranium and leave the rest of the carcass.

          2. grrizzly

            That’s not what I saw at Brooks Falls.

          3. Not Adahn

            Maybe those were paleo bears?

          4. Drake

            Some owls prefer the sweet meats.

    7. Count Potato

      It could have been a eagle, or an Eagles fan.

    8. Annoyed Nomad

      I had a semi-feral cat that decided to live part-time at our house. He was friendly with people, but could be vicious with animals. He regularly killed and ate birds – I’d find their carcasses around the yard when mowing. One morning I found a decapitated rabbit. The rabbit’s ears were missing – I assumed they were delicious.

      1. Annoyed Nomad

        Then one morning I found him curled up on our front porch, dead. I think someone had poisoned him. My daughter had named him Golden. He lived a short life, but he lived it his way.

        1. B.P.

          This isn’t the happy ending I was hoping for.

    9. Old Man With Candy

      A Negro.

    10. Enough About Palin

      Amsterdam Vallon?

    11. Brasidas

      My dog decapitated a rabbit once.

      Proudest I’ve ever seen that dog.

      1. B.P.

        My now deceased shepherd-husky mix charged through a foot of fresh snow to catch a huge rabbit. She then gently unscrewed the head, dressed the rabbit by unstitching the fur down the middle of its stomach, and lined up the head, furless body, and fur side-by-side. She ate every last bit. I began to wonder what I had living in my house.

        1. R C Dean

          *makes sign of cross*

          The male Dean Beast is ordinarily the laziest, cuddliest li’l bundle of muscle you ever saw.

          Until a snake or a lizard shows up. Then he’s fifty pounds of pure murder. After killing a rather substantial Gila Monster almost exactly a year ago, he is the King of the Lizard Killers. He followed up a week later with a four foot (or so) black racer snake.

          Praise Allah that he immediately loses interest, and doesn’t eat them.

          1. The cat I had before I got married was a killer. She was also hand-raised, bottle-fed (by me) from a newborn and hated everybody and everything except me.

          2. I feed my cats ever so slightly less than would satiate them. I get multiple dead critters at my doorstep each week, year round. If I’m only seeing what they don’t eat, I’m curious as to how much they do eat.

          3. B.P.

            Ha. I think my late dog lived on the streets for a long time, as she just showed up at my house one day in a state of near starvation. I think her time outdoors helped her keep in touch with her instinctual skills.

      2. Juan-Baptiste Emmanuel Seguin

        My old puppers once caught a squirrel and started eating it butt first, leaving a little bloody hand puppet for me. She was so damn proud of herself, and I kinda was too.

        Damn I miss that dog.

    12. Heroic Mulatto

      Me.

    13. Stillhunter

      Weasels are famous for decapitating. Headless chickens is a typical thing for those raising them. They prefer the really good fatty parts. The meat is some of the last to go for most animal kills, at least for the truly edible parts. It has the least nutritional value. Brains, eyes, guts usually go first. Our ancestors ate many of these parts for the same reasons.

  10. Count Potato

    “Eric Juengst, the director of the University of North Carolina Center for Bioethics, has been thinking about these questions for two decades — back when such drugs were little more than thought experiments.

    We tend to think of drugs that enhance performance — say, sports doping — as bad. Drugs that cure or prevent diseases are good. “The scientific community and the public all draw that line,” said Dr. Juengst.”

    I think people should start using “bioethicist” as insult, like “clown” or “whore”.

    1. Mad Scientist

      Their job description is basically: clutch pearls over the idea of the unwashed masses taking advantage of ________.

    2. R C Dean

      We tend to think of drugs that enhance performance — say, sports doping — as bad.

      Millions of boner pill users (and, one hopes, their partners) beg to disagree.

  11. Tundra

    Don’t know anything about Shooter, but that really was a trip.

    Reminded me of this classic.

    1. Brett L

      He’s mostly pop country unless you count that album with Hierophant or the tribute LP he did to the guy who did half the video game and movie soundtracks in the 80s — including a note-for-note cover of the Neverending Story theme with the original female lead. I find his pop country not particularly good (or bad) for the genre, but his other stuff is interesting.

      1. Tundra

        Thanks! I’d like to hear more experimental stuff. I like it when musicians do stuff that pisses their fans off.

  12. The Late P Brooks

    Long way of asking, what killed it? I’m thinking owl, but friend suggested a fox.

    One of my friends told me an owl got into their chicken coop and pulled the heads off a bunch of chickens. Didn’t eat them, just slaughtered them.

    Make of that what you will.

    1. PBRstreetgang

      Interesting. I’m leaning even more towards owl.

      1. Old Man With Candy

        Well, Temple is in Philly, so…

    2. Spudalicious

      Up at our cabin, one of my dogs breasted out one of the neighbors chicken. Apparently, he wasn’t into dark meat.

    3. Fourscore

      I’m thinking weasel (ferret)

      1. Stillhunter

        Hah, I should have scrolled down!

  13. Rasilio

    Hey guys, big surprise, the government-backed Space Launch System is basically still vaporware, but Elon Musk’s rocket might save the day.

    Lol will never happen because Space X probably won’t even be manufacturing Falcon Heavy by 2024, at that point they will be entirely on the Falcon Super Heavy (Formerly the BFR) and Starship which can deploy lunar missions all on it’s own

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/BFR_(rocket)

    Already Space X is planning on a commercial lunar fly with Super Heavy/Spaceship by in 2023

    1. Juvenile Bluster

      Once again I question how Elon Musk, a complete asshole who runs a company as shitty as Tesla, can somehow run a company as amazing as SpaceX.

      1. Tundra

        Because other people actually run it.

        1. Winston

          Did he actually form Space-X or did he come afterwards like with Tesla?

          1. Juvenile Bluster

            Musk started SpaceX.

          2. R C Dean

            I heard somewhere that he basically got into Tesla as a battery development thing, that sells cars to pay for battery research.

            He’s definitely a raconteur/con man, but damn he does interesting shit.

      2. jesse.in.mb

        Eh. The employees are true believers and they recently cut ~10% of their more senior (read expensive) employees.

      3. Count Potato

        He also seriously dated Amber Heard, who is ultra-violent trailer trash.

    2. Suthenboy

      I hear all of the wowing over SpaceX but I dont hear any details about how much of the money put into it is private and how much is taxpayer subsidy. Given it is Musk I am gonna guess he is still playing on my dime.

      1. jesse.in.mb

        Huh. It looks like that’s a more complicated question than it should be. Overt government subsidies seem to be relatively low for what they are doing, but competitors claim that NASA and the USAF pay premium prices to goose SpaceX’s bottom line:

        “The price for a US customer is not the same as the price for a commercial customer,” he said. “You can call it what you want, but that is a fact. It is known that the Air Force has procured launches at $100 million, when on the commercial market the price is well below for the same service.”

        Although Ars seems to think that total costs are lower with private companies receiving subsidies than they would be without the private companies in play at all.

        1. Rasilio

          Space X is as close as it is possible to get to a completely privately funded Space Launch company. They pay for all of their rocket development themselves and only charge for launch services for the most part

  14. How the heck are each and every one of YOU?

    I’m feeling better now that I finished the first few interviews. It’s been a few years, and I was uncertain of how well I’d handle it.

    It went… Meh.

    Still have more candidates to interview.

    1. Chipping Pioneer

      “Why don’t you sit up on the desk so I can get a look at you, sweetheart.”

      1. R C Dean

        *drops pen and rolls it past shapely interviewee*

        “Clumsy me. Would you mind bending over and picking that up for me?”

        *waggles eyebrows*

        “I’m sure I can find a, err, position for you.”

  15. Rebel Scum

    I work in a highly and ever more regulated industry and I took a jab at said regulation while talking to a coworker. He immediately started talking as if I had said there should be no government (which I didn’t suggest in the slightest ///minarchist) because “we don’t need to make sure no one is trying to poison us or ensure that there is clean water. Everyone will just act in each others best interest. Hardy har har.” And he apparently thinks that speeding is not a victim-less crime because “someone might be cruising down the highway at 100mph and run into the back of a school bus. So there’s your victim. Ha! You silly anarchist!”. He strikes me as left of center and prone to logical fallacies. But I have even gotten similar tropes about “making sure prisons are operating” from ostensibly conservative acquaintances when I have taken a jab a taxation. I don’t get it.

    1. Mad Scientist

      Several years ago some coworkers were razzing me about being a libertarian and how unfair the world be. “Why, what if I went into every restaurant you wanted to go to for lunch and just bought all the food so you couldn’t have any?” I had to ask them what law they knew of that made doing exactly that illegal right now. “Well, that’s not the point!” Uh, huh.

      1. Rebel Scum

        I’d wager that person supports price gouging laws, which ironically cause temporarily limited resources to disappear and not be replenished because it ignores supply/demand and removes incentive.

      2. Rhywun

        There is zero chance I would ever allow myself to be dragged into a political conversation at work. WTF is wrong with you people?

        1. Mad Scientist

          This particular co-worker was a good friend of my girlfriend, so we spent plenty of time together outside of work. It’s not a conversation I would normally have with a co-worker while on our way to Illegal Pete’s for lunch. The guy who was with us just sort of got dragged in.

        2. I mostly agree with the no politics at work thing, but in the times it has come up, I began to realize that I sit next to a Randian objectivist. On the rare occasions only he and I are out to lunch together, our conversations are pretty good.

          1. The Last American Hero

            All those conversations about rough sex being the only kind of sex sound kind of boring, actually.

        3. Enough About Palin

          ^^THIS^^ and I work in Government & Community Affairs.

        4. R C Dean

          There is zero chance I would ever allow myself to be dragged into a political conversation at work.

          Same here. Doing so is basically on par with sending your soon-to-be-ex nude selfies.

    2. Suthenboy

      when it comes to social/political policy most people lose about 60 IQ points.

    3. blackjack

      Man, I was talking about the Janus decision when it came down. I’m in a pubsec union. I said that it was good for us because the union would have to make sure we’re happy so we’d keep paying dues. The whole room just went off on me. Yelling about how I need to give the union respect, how they’d stand up for me when the chips are down, etc.. it was over the top crazy. I just keep my mouth shut now.

      1. Gustave Lytton

        Unions resemble a cult from the inside.

        1. Spudalicious

          You should see firefighter union meetings. The leadership isn’t exactly held in reverence if the membership has a bug up their butt about something.

          1. The Last American Hero

            I imagine it’s a bit like being in a British pub listening to guys bitch about the royal family. And then you, the ugly American, says, “Yeah, you should tell them to fuck off like we did 200 years ago.” And the room goes real quiet as all the heads slowly turn in your direction.

  16. Gustave Lytton

    Preliminary report on Ethiopian Airlines crash is out. Pilots responded to the faulty MCAS correctly, but apparently weren’t able regain trim manually and & reengaged MCAS, leading to the final nose down event.

    https://www.wsj.com/articles/ethiopian-airlines-pilots-initially-followed-boeings-required-emergency-steps-to-disable-737-max-system-11554263276

    1. Michael

      Can’t see the article (paywalled), but there’s apparently some conflicting info going around. This article suggests that the pilots turned the MCAS off but that it subsequently flipped itself back on:

      https://arstechnica.com/information-technology/2019/04/ethiopian-air-pilots-turned-off-737-max-anti-stall-system-then-it-turned-on-again/

      1. Tundra

        FTA:

        The pilots on Ethiopian Airlines Flight 302 initially reacted to the emergency by shutting off power to electric motors driven by the automated system, these people said, but then appear to have re-engaged the system to cope with a persistent steep nose-down angle. It wasn’t immediately clear why the pilots turned the automated system back on instead of continuing to follow Boeing’s standard emergency checklist, but government and industry officials said the likely reason would have been because manual controls to raise the nose didn’t achieve the desired results.

        After first cranking a manual wheel in the cockpit that controls the same movable surfaces on the plane’s tail that MCAS had affected, the pilots turned electric power back on, one of these people said. They began to use electric switches to try to raise the plane’s nose, according to these people. But the electric power also reactivated MCAS, allowing it to continue its strong downward commands, the people said.

        Sounds like a combo platter of tech and pilot.

  17. The Late P Brooks

    Speaking of regulating facebook, guess who agrees with Zuck?

    Mark Zuckerberg, Facebook’s chief executive, recently raised a lot of suspicion when he argued for government regulation of his own company and other social media platforms. Some people have been skeptical of his motives, complaining that he is trying to fend off more aggressive regulation or to squelch competition.

    But instead of attacking the messenger, we should discuss the message on its merits. Zuckerberg’s argument is an important step in the right direction — one that should produce sustained discussion and eventually legislation. 1

    Heads of companies don’t usually contend that the government should be regulating them. But Zuckerberg rightly noted that if we were starting anew, we would not want private companies to decide, entirely on their own, how to answer the fundamental questions that social media providers are now facing.

    Consider the integrity of elections — a problem made most vivid by Russian interference with the 2016 U.S. presidential election.

    Yep. The Russians hacked our election because the government refuses to police the internet.

    1. Juvenile Bluster

      Heads of companies don’t usually contend that the government should be regulating them

      They do it all the fucking time. It’s the easiest way to stop any potential competition from getting started in the first place.

      1. ChipsnSalsa

        !

    2. ChipsnSalsa

      Heads of companies don’t usually contend that the government should be regulating them.

      They sure do when more regulations will (in their mind) enshrine them as the sole provider for a long time.

      1. Mad Scientist

        Fisher-Price lobbied hard for mandatory and expensive lead testing in children’s products several years ago, with a nice exemption for companies who could perform their own testing, such as, for example, Fisher-Price.

        1. Tonio

          ^This. I think they were specifically targeting Doug and Melissa who were an up and coming company at the time.

          1. Juvenile Bluster

            Other way around. Melissa and Doug.

            (so many of their toys in the house when the kid was younger…)

        2. Rhywun

          Yep, Zuck already has all the infrastructure in place to comply with any trashing of the 1st Amendment they might dream up. That writer is an idiot.

        3. Mad Scientist

          Now that I think of it, I recall the whole lead toy scare was due to some Chinese toys manufactured for….Fisher-Price.

    3. Fatty Bolger

      What a piece of shit.

    4. Rasilio

      Heads of companies don’t usually contend that the government should be regulating them.

      Evidence for this assertion? I can think of plenty of instances of CEO’s calling for regulation of their business but I can think of only a handful of cases where they opposed a specific regulation and none where they opposed the idea of being regulated at all.

      1. DrOtto

        The automakers used to fight government dictates tooth and nail until they realized that by being “forced” to add things like ABS and airbags, they could charge more for what were previously unpopular, but very profitable options. Now as an industry, they will suggest things to be mandated, like back up cameras.

      1. Winston

        Doesn’t Popehat hit some of his own tropes these days? I recall he said that Shitposting is terrorism after that New Zealand attack…

        1. Juvenile Bluster

          Not really? He called a bunch of Breitbart commenters assholes (which they, tbf, are), but didn’t call on anything to be done about it, and he shit on the New Zealand law making it a crime to publish the manifesto.

        2. Not Adahn

          He has been 1A >>> free speech for a long time. Here he is saying that if someone makes fun of you on the internet, it is “legitimate” to go after them, their employers, and their family.

          https://www.popehat.com/2017/07/05/cnn-doxing-and-a-few-ways-in-which-we-are-full-of-shit-as-a-political-culture/

          1. Juvenile Bluster

            Not really.

            But there’s a difference between legal and moral approval. I defend the Redditor’s right to post bigoted garbage but deplore him for doing so. And, under these circumstances, I personally think that it would not be proportional for CNN to use its power to name the person.

          2. Not Adahn

            He’s very good at CYA, but when he writes a paragraph saying what an awesome principled free speech defender he is, and 1500 words about what a horrible racist bigot his current bete noir is and how getting them deplatformed is absolutely a free speech stance it rings hollow.

            Like how he used to write post condemning lawfare and SLAPP suits — until Van Valkenberg v. Gjoni, then he went conspicuously silent.

            There was also a very long twitter slapfest he got into with someone (Tim Pool?) where he was going all Socratic claiming that 1A is the only part of free speech that matters. Which is just the tits, as long as you’re sure that it’s the opinions you don’t like are going to get carved out. That was before Kavanaugh though, so he’s probably changes his mind about that.

    5. Rebel Scum

      Consider the integrity of elections

      Facebook has zero to do with this.

  18. The Late P Brooks

    PEOPLE OF EARTH, I AM KLOTHO, GOD EMPEROR MOUSE

    KNEEL BEFORE ME

    Whatever. It could be worse.

    1. DrOtto

      Hillary Rodent Clinton.

  19. Juvenile Bluster

    How the heck are each and every one of YOU?

    I hate my life and everyone in it except for my wife and daughter. And you guys.

    1. Mad Scientist

      Be honest. We rate higher than your wife and daughter more often than you’re comfortable with, right?

    2. Enough About Palin

      So how much for your wife and daughter?

  20. Fatty Bolger

    So, I just heard Foo Fighters’ “Learn to Fly” on the radio, and realized that according to the calendar it’s been 20 years since it came out. This is clearly an impossibility, and I need an explanation. There’s no way 20 years of stuff has happened to me between then and now. Related: Where’s my fucking flying car? I’m positive we were supposed to have them by this date.

    1. Tonio

      Sure, kid. I’m still waiting for my lunar vacation.

      1. Tundra

        Wake me for the Libertarian Moment.

        1. R C Dean

          Sure thing, Mr. Van Winkle.

    2. Rasilio

      We’ve actually had working flying cars for about 20 years, now about regulations that would allow them to be sold to the general public…

      1. robc

        Have you seen people drive in 2D? I dont want them in 3D.

        Heck, I want them out of 2D.

    3. The Last American Hero

      The only thing I’m wondering is why you didn’t change the channel.

    4. PudPaisley

      I like the video for that song with Electric Mayhem and Dave Grohl. Very inspirational.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0x2WL_9bVyw

      1. Tundra

        Love that.

        Thanks, PP!

      2. Rhywun

        My dad loves Dave Grohl!

        ?

        1. Tundra

          Well, Spawn 1 is a big FF fan, so I feel ok with that.

          Still, we’re really getting old.

          1. PudPaisley

            Last winter I seen Dave Grohl perform his rock opus “Play” live for the first time at Warren Haynes Xmas jam. It was intense. One of the main highlights of the two night show. Dave is an amazing drummer. Spawn 1 might like this.

            https://soundcloud.com/dfrieslivesoundandvideo/sets/christmas-jam

            Abbie the Spoon Lady came out for one of the parts.

  21. RBS

    All of these names sound made up.

    1. Count Potato

      “On Tuesday , former federal prosecutor Lori Lightfoot defeated Toni Preckwinkle in Chicago’s mayoral runoff election, earning roughly 75 percent of the vote and winning all 50 wards.

      The landslide victory makes Lightfoot the city’s first black woman and the first openly gay person elected mayor.”

      I don’t know about all these women claiming to be gay or bisexual. Pics or it didn’t happen.

      1. kinnath

        They just haven’t met Chuck Norris yet.

      2. Spartacus

        Lori Lightfoot defeated Toni Preckwinkle

        This sounds like the start of a Carl Hiaasen novel.

      3. R C Dean

        the first openly gay person elected mayor

        I don’t know if its intentional, ignorance, or just bad writing, but she is nowhere near the first openly gay mayor. Houston elected one nearly ten years ago, and my West Texas town elected one probably 12 years ago (for certain values of “openly” – he never said as much, but everybody knew).

        1. The author seems to mean the first for Chicago. Which as far as I know could be BS also.

          1. R C Dean

            Sure, but that ain’t what xe wrote. It is easily read as the first gay mayor anywhere. I wonder if it was intended to be misleading that way.

          2. The landslide victory makes Lightfoot the city’s first black woman and the first openly gay person elected mayor.

            I haven’t diagramed a sentence in 30+ years (and I never did it well back then) but I believe “the city’s” modifies both ‘first black’ and ‘openly gay’ in relation to the mayor of Chicago, unless you think the first part is claiming that she’s the first black women in Chicago. It might be clunky, but not intentionally misleading in my opinion.

          3. Rhywun

            It is clunky. Should read “and its first openly-gay”.

          4. invisible finger

            They keep saying “openly” so that Harold Washington is kept in the closet.

      1. jesse.in.mb

        Is she related to Gordon?

        1. Tundra

          You fucking with me?

          1. jesse.in.mb

            Nah, just incompetent apparently.

        2. jesse.in.mb

          Wow, what’s worse is I somehow accidentally replied to Tundra with a Gordon Lightfoot link instead of RBS

          1. Tundra

            I like the live version!

            Here’s a bonus song for you.

          2. Spudalicious

            And the same song.

          3. jesse.in.mb

            I guess I could’ve done Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald, but I like Sundown more.

          4. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

            I like Sundown more.

            Fist bump, bruh.

            /both are perfectly cromulent

      2. I wish her opponent had been named Thunderbolt.

        1. Tundra

          Now available on Netflix.

          How’s vacation?

          1. Really enjoying it, thanks. Turks and Caicos is a pretty amazing island for a beach vacation.

            Snorkeling yesterday, I saw a large fish with what looked like a bunch of feathers and spikes, like the tropical fish Wanda was in a Fish Called Wanda. But I have had the worst internet search ever trying to find it. If you even enter “species of fish named Wanda”, all you get for page after page is reviews, cast lists, or sites to download the movie.

            If anyone knows what kind of fish that is, please let me know.

          2. slumbrew

            I thought Wanda was just an angelfish.

            Feathers & spikes sort of sounds like a lionfish.

          3. According to this White Angel Fish

          4. Not Adahn

            *smdh* We need more diversity in Angel Fish casting.

          5. Tundra

            Yeah, it’s our fave. Been there twice and planning a third.

            Did you see the Potcakes pups yet? A major high;ight for my kids.

            Are you on Grace Bay?

          6. Yes, we’re in Grace Bay. Salt mills is a quick drive from here, we’ll check out the pups tomorrow, thanks!

          7. And thanks, it was absolutely a lionfish! Google images was like a photocopy. So glad to get that figured out!

          8. slumbrew

            Do not touch the lionfish. Do, however, eat the lionfish. Invasive fuckers.

          9. kinnath

            I have a friend that is a diver. He spends his vacations hunting lionfish.

          10. slumbrew

            I was looking at T&C for my wife’s *mumble*-th birthday this Febuary, but doing just a long weekend from Boston was impractical – flight there wasn’t bad but the flight back was something like 12 hours, since we couldn’t go direct.

            It was all set up for week-long stays.

            Next time.

            Aruba was pretty great, with multiple daily direct flights – which is why it’s overrun with Bostonians.

  22. Rebel Scum

    “Every day, we make decisions about what speech is harmful, what constitutes political advertising, and how to prevent sophisticated cyberattacks,” he began. “These are important for keeping our community safe. But if we were starting from scratch, we wouldn’t ask companies to make these judgments alone.”

    The government is expressly prohibited from violating the freedom of speech. And now my eye is twitching because this crap is so dangerously stupid.

  23. Count Potato

    “Teacher claims she was fired over topless selfie to boyfriend

    A Long Island middle school teacher was fired last week when an old topless selfie that she sent to a boyfriend surfaced — in the hands of a student, according to a new court filing.

    Lauren Miranda, a 25-year-old former Bellport Middle School math teacher, was fired Wednesday after a student somehow obtained the image, according to her lawyer, John Ray.

    Miranda and Ray have filed a notice of claim in the case as a precursor to a $3 million lawsuit.

    “Long ago, she sent her topless unremarkable selfie to her companion, never to anyone else,” Ray said. “By unknown means, a student obtained it. The school district took possession of it, excoriated her, and fired her because her breasts were displayed.”

    Miranda and her lawyer contend that a male teacher would not have been subjected to the same treatment in similar circumstances and that she wants her job back.

    “This would never have happened to a male teacher,” Ray said. “The Suffolk County Administrators and School Board have not yet discovered that women are equal to men. Lauren is rightly proud of her female torso. A woman’s breasts are not inherently prurient.””

    https://nypost.com/2019/04/01/teacher-claims-she-was-fired-over-nude-selfie-to-boyfriend/

    “Teacher fired over topless photo, threatens $3M federal lawsuit, alleges gender discrimination: report”

    https://www.foxnews.com/us/long-island-teacher-fired-over-topless-photo-threatens-3m-federal-lawsuit-alleges-gender-discrimination-report

    1. Rasilio

      Miranda and her lawyer contend that a male teacher would not have been subjected to the same treatment in similar circumstances and that she wants her job back.

      Ok look I agree that she should not have been fired unless there is evidence that she sent the picture to the kid herself but lets get real here, There is a huge difference between a topless man and a topless woman. Feminists can deny it all they like but the human female breast is an inherently sexual display

      1. RBS

        How patriarchicahalal of you.

      2. B.P.

        Yep. Another denial of reality. I do like this line from Creepy Lawyer, Esq.:

        “Lauren is rightly proud of her female torso. “

      3. jesse.in.mb
        1. Rhywun

          Blurry man boobs are a huge turn-on.

          1. Tundra

            You both must have missed Scruffy’s math teacher link.

          2. jesse.in.mb

            Huh, Pietro Boselli’s ass was seen in the wild and I’m just hearing about it two years later? I’ll be damned.

      4. Tonio

        “the human female breast is an inherently sexual display”

        Dirty titty, dirty titty. We must protect children, particularly the very youngest ones, from these inherently sexual uncovered boobies.

        1. Not Adahn

          If they aren’t, then we must codify and harness whatever teaching technique is used to convince people that bewbs are hot and apply that to libertarian propaganda.

          1. Scruffy Nerfherder

            I thought that was the role of Mythical Libertarian Woman.

    2. R C Dean

      Eh, we worked this over already. She’s an idiot, her effectiveness as a teacher is impaired, and the school is right/not wrong to fire her dumb ass.

      Her gender discrimination claim is bullshit, though. If that’s her lawsuit, it tells me she probably doesn’t have a case under her contract.

      1. Count Potato

        How is the school right for firing her if she didn’t release the photo?

        1. Jarflax

          Your job belongs to your employer, not you. If something happens that makes you unable to do your job effectively, even if it isn’t your fault, the employer is correct to fire you. Up to this point I agree with RCD, the question to me is whether this actually makes her unable to do the job effectively.

          1. My thought is that it’s indicative of 2 things: 1) a complete lack of good judgment and foresight, and 2) a breakdown of authority in the classroom.

            Like I said in the earlier thread, if those flaws are showing up in her job performance already, nows the time to can her. If she’s a good teacher who just got bit for doing something stupid, then let her off with a slap on the wrist.

            My guess is that she wasn’t good enough of a teacher for the administration to bother going to bat for her.

          2. Shen was approximately 22 when she took the photo. If we’re going to fire any teacher that has a nudie photo appear years after it was taken, then . . . well . . . we aren’t going to have many teachers left to choose from. Right or wrong, people coming of age nowadays pass those photos around like a joint at a Grateful Dead concert. I’m not willing to condemn anyone for the mistakes they made years earlier. I believe in redemption.

    3. DrOtto

      Plot twist, the student was the boyfriend?

  24. The Late P Brooks

    And now my eye is twitching because this crap is so dangerously stupid.

    Inspector Clouseau is waiting to see you.

  25. kinnath

    https://thehill.com/homenews/senate/437189-gop-triggers-nuclear-option-to-speed-up-trump-picks

    Senate Republicans deployed the “nuclear option” on Wednesday to drastically reduce the amount of time it takes to confirm hundreds of President Trump’s nominees.

    Senators voted 51-48 to change the rules for the amount of time it takes to confirm most executive nominations with only a simple majority of the chamber. GOP Sens. Mike Lee (Utah) and Susan Collins (Maine) joined with Democrats in opposing the rules change.

    Republicans are expected to trigger the “nuclear option” for a second time later Wednesday to force through the same change for district court nominations.

    The combined actions will result in most nominations that require Senate confirmation needing only two hours of debate after they’ve defeated a filibuster that shows they have the votes to ultimately be confirmed. Before Wednesday’s rules change they faced up to an additional 30 hours of debate.

    1. R C Dean

      This may come back to bite them, although considering the Dems invented the nuclear option, I doubt that a future Dem majority wouldn’t have done the same thing but for the Repubs doing it now.

      The thing about having supermajority requirements like the “filibuster” is that the majority can always take them away. The minority should deploy them carefully and judiciously, not indiscriminately. Whether the Dems have been “abusing” the supermajority requirement to block/delay perfectly good nominees, I really couldn’t say. The road to weakening the filibuster may have been paved when it went from being a real filibuster (a Senator actually had to hold the floor of the Senate) to a purely procedural supermajority vote, which is much more easily abused.

  26. BakedPenguin

    Here’s a little something for when the edibles kick in.

    Here’s something for when the clear liquid hits.

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      Was that supposed to be a link to an Imodium advertisement?

    2. BakedPenguin

      Goddamn you’re harshing my buzz today, HTML:

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wae9iDJQHIs

    3. Cool clear liquid, bro.

      1. BakedPenguin

        Dudes. Umm… what? Oh, quit harshing my buzz.

  27. Rebel Scum

    Elon Musk’s rocket might save the day

    Just don’t let a grade-school teacher fly in his rocket. (I’m going to hell for that one…)

    1. Raston Bot

      how’d they know Christa McAuliffe had dandruff?

      they found her Head and Shoulders.

      1. Jarflax

        What’s this button do?

  28. Winston

    So has the Canadian LP offered Jane Philpott and Jody Wilson-Raybould party membership?

    1. Pan Zagloba

      God dammit, I hope not.

      It may not have been obvious over the years, but I’m not a fan of PM Zoolander, his idiotic cult, or even the Liberal Party. But for once, he’s a Less Bad Guy in all this. Because if he loses, the Natural Ruling Party gets taken over by less attractive, more stridently harridanish AOC clones and then the country finds out what lies beyond STEVE SMITHING.

      1. the Natural Ruling Party gets taken over by less attractive, more stridently harridanish AOC clones

        They’re not all already in the New Dictators Party?

        1. Pan Zagloba

          points at Zoolander’s cabinet

          They used to be, than the idiot dragged them into the halls of power. I mean, consider Friedland’s books and tell me how the fuck she belongs with Liberals and not New Democrats.

          1. Winston

            the idiot dragged them into the halls of power

            So the history of liberalism since the 1890s?

            I mean we have the Trudeaus thanks to Lester Pearson. Gerald Butts started in the employ of Allan MacEachen who was first elected under Louis St. Laurent. And both Pearson and St. Laurent were brought in by Mackenzie King who was brought in by Wilfrid Laurier, etc…

      2. Winston

        The Natural Ruling Party gets taken over by less attractive, more stridently harridanish AOC clones

        Um didn’t his Dad due that already?

        1. Winston

          Can’t believe I spelt that word wrong.

        2. Pan Zagloba

          No, he got their votes, and gave them dick in return.

          This is a mess of Zoolander’s own making. Instead of taking loyal party soldiers like Heddie and Sheila and stuffing them into meaningless positions, he wanted to show off how cool and fresh he was, and the Parliament now looks like a student takeover of a US university.

          1. Winston

            This is a mess of Zoolander’s own making. Instead of taking loyal party soldiers like Heddie and Sheila and stuffing them into meaningless positions, he wanted to show off how cool and fresh he was, and the Parliament now looks like a student takeover of a US university.

            This was pretty obvious with the expulsion of all the Liberal Senators as if he ever intended the Senate to not a partisan body,

            Funny how corrupt corporate liberals do this all the time and it fucks us all up. Wilson Raybould’s tinkering with the jury system was perfectly fine with him until she turned against typical Liberal Quebec corruption. Also Harper was mean to the Natives but him ignoring their wishes is fine.

            I mean we are supposed to prefer Pelosi and Biden to AOC despite the former two being advocates of Obamacare which the GOP inability to repeal it being terrible.

            And prefer the old-school urban machine democrats to the woke brigade. Nevermind these machine Democrats were the ones who created the welfare state that is bankrupting us.

          2. BakedPenguin

            …he wanted to show off how cool and fresh he was, and the Parliament now looks like a student takeover of a US university.

            Evergreen Parliament! Good luck with that, dudes.

  29. Winston

    https://reason.com/blog/2019/04/03/an-economist-walks-into-a-brothel-what-p

    What Prostitutes and Big-Wave Surfers Can Teach Us About Risk

    Peak Gillespie?

    1. Heroic Mulatto

      He’s muscling in on our territory.

    1. Winston

      I wonder how Chinese and Russian foreign intervention fits in with libertarian foreign policy. I see a lot of talk about American Foreign policy but not a lot about actual libertarian foreign policy.

      Rothbard and Rockwell would/will say something about how China and Russia only interfere in the affairs of their neighbors, unlike the US, and say something about spheres of influence. Of course by that reasoning the US intervention in Venezuela is much more justified than Syria or Iraq due to proximity and historical reasons (Monroe Doctrine) so all they have left is whataboutism.

    2. Rebel Scum

      “Advisers”.

      1. Gustave Lytton

        Or repo men. Venezuela owes the Chicoms some like $20B.

        1. Spudalicious

          ^^This^^ I’m willing to bet they’re there to protect their assets owed by Venezuala, as opposed to Maduro.

        2. BakedPenguin

          Good luck getting that back, unless they have actual claims on their oil.

          1. Spudalicious

            Look what they did in Nigeria. They now own a major port in the region. And they’re doing the same thing to other countries that can’t pay back loans, by design. There is definitely collateral outlined in the agreement with Venezuala.

    3. Rhywun

      It’s like they’re interviewing different suitors to be a puppet-state to.

  30. Not Adahn

    I wasn’t able to post this in response to the C.O.B.R.A. link

    A history of the 1911

  31. Spudalicious

    “One Day There May Be a Drug to Turbocharge the Brain. Who Should Get It?”

    Napoleon Dynamite?

    1. Mad Scientist

      Hank Johnson could really use a hit of that stuff.

    2. Hyperion

      As I explained below, no one will be getting anything to enhance anything, because as I explain downthread it will either be illegal or a gray area making it hard to get and expensive. Of course, I admit, you have enough money to spare, you can get anything you want. But if you’re on a budge and need to eat, you’ll be shit out of luck because FYTW.

      1. t will either be illegal or a gray area making it hard to get and expensive

        See: modafinil.

        1. Subwoofer

          Modafinil is overhyped. I was part of a research trial where I tested 3 drugs for effectiveness as a cognitive enhancer. Modafinil was one of them, and was by far the least effective.

          Now Tolcapone, that stuff is legit.

          1. I’ll research that, thanks.

            I was more interested in modafinil as a keep-me-awake type thing.

  32. Rebel Scum

    I, for one, am entirely shocked by this development.

    “Will gangs get rid of their weapons? No,” Fatu told the outlet. “Because of who we are, we can’t guarantee our own safety.”

    Citing an April 2017 report by the Law and Order Select Committee, Stuff notes that a 2014 police analysis found that nearly half of gang members were charged with firearms offenses. Gang members have admitted that many of those weapons have been obtained illegally. But, Fatu insists, they are necessary for their own protection — and haven’t resulted in the kinds of mass violence that occured in Christchurch.

    “It’s not in our culture to inflict harm on innocent people like what happened in Christchurch,” Fatu told Stuff. “The attacks between our organizations are gang-on-gang, they do not involve the non-gang members.”

    I don’t know anything about these so called gangs, but interesting nonetheless.

    1. B.P.

      When you’re a Jet you’re a Jet all the way.

    2. Tonio

      They want an ethnic carveout. Money quote:

      “[H]ow many [mass shootings] have been committed by someone of Pākehā origin?” he asked, referencing white New Zealanders. “

  33. Hyperion

    “Anyone got a CRISPR machine I could borrow?”

    If there is ever anything discovered that can be used for ‘enhancement’, the FDA will either outright get it banned or regulated to the point that it can only be used for treating symptoms of some disease, not for enhancement. Just like they do with testosterone. We’ll let you know if you need any enhancement peasants, and you don’t.

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      Mutilate your genitalia and hormonal balance in an attempt to be another sex? Fine, even celebrated.

      Attempt to improve your cognitive or physical capabilities through enhancement? We’ll be having none of that.

      1. Hyperion

        Well, that, yeah. But the trannies are not enhancing anything. They’re destroying their own bodies and mental health. Makes then more likely to vote for crazy dems, so it’s all good.

        1. Count Potato

          Most of the MTF’s I know are right of center, and from what I can tell from people online, they tend to get more lefty the less passable they are.

      2. Gadfly

        Hmmm…what if I identify as a genius? Do I get to have the cognitive enhancement now? And if not, is that bigotry against my lived experience?

        So many questions.

    2. slumbrew

      * hides testosterone prescription behind the mouthwash *

      1. Hyperion

        No pellets?

        1. slumbrew

          Pellets weren’t offered as an option – not sure they were even available when I started. The gel is fine, just need to either shower before bed or keep a t-shirt on.

  34. Raston Bot

    been doing some genealogy lately. traced my family back to an English immigrant who landed in the Virginia colony in 1669. haven’t found anything yet about the American Revolution but i do have ancestors who fought on both sides of the Civil War. it’s amazing how much of that archival stuff was maintained and digitized.

    sidenote: when looking at casualty numbers from the Civil War for each unit, “disease” was far and away the biggest killer

    1. Winston

      Apparently the Russo-Japanese War was the first time that the actual war caused more casualties than disease.

    2. creech

      Yep, the muster from my ancestor’s regiment (garrison troops, basically) was zero combat deaths and seven by disease.

    3. Drake

      Large groups of poorly fed people marching around the countryside in the weather before antibiotics. An open invitation for plagues.

      1. Tonio

        And shitting everywhere, Drake. How can you forget that? It’s like Woodstock, only worserer.

    4. Tonio

      “‘disease’ was far and away the biggest killer”

      Interesting. But remember that mid-nineteenth century medicine knew jack shit about germ theory, surgical sterility, sepsis, listeria, etc.

      If you’re ever in Richmond, Virginia do visit the Civil War Medical Museum. The horror, the horror. They cut and sewed human bodies like shoddily engineered sails. Wash the instruments between surgeries? There’s no time, man.

      1. Spudalicious

        And a blood soaked apron was an advertisement for how quickly you can get surgery done.

        1. Tonio

          Trauma medicine and surgery have been hugely advanced by war and the automobile. Trauma medicine and surgery have been hugely necessitated by war and the automobile.

          1. DrOtto

            You can say that again!

          2. Hey! Johnny Tremain was able to get a great Revolutionary War surgeon to fix his metalsmithing-damaged hand.

            And America matured at the same time.

            /Junior high English teacher who showed novels can work on several levels.

      2. The Last American Hero

        I look forward to the MASH Civil War Edition reboot.

        1. Winston

          Pretty sure there is a PBS show like that.

  35. Scruffy Nerfherder
    1. Rebel Scum

      He’s got to outlast RBG.

    2. Pan Zagloba

      He enjoys the RBG Death Watch circus and wants the next Democrat president to have one, too?

  36. Drake

    The U.S. Army Selects New Submachine Gun – for a mere $7k per gun.

    Nothing left to cut.

    1. Gustave Lytton

      I’d like to pick up a HK MP7 from my local gun store. Also, fuck PSDs.

    2. Not Adahn

      I cannot wait to hear the reasons for this.

      1. CPRM

        It was really cool.

    3. mexican sharpshooter

      $7,000? Do the bullets aim themselves?

      1. Spudalicious

        It’s Swiss, man. What do you expect?

        1. mexican sharpshooter

          Gold plated ammunition?

    4. BakedPenguin

      They couldn’t at least find a US company to give that gravy to? Assholes.

    5. Tundra

      It better come with the C.O.B.R.A scope.

    6. Count Potato

      How much does a new MP-5 cost?

    1. Rhywun

      Democrats pounce!

    2. Tulip

      She has principles?

  37. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Yes, yes, of course, I see gay bodies in ditches everywhere, the result of being denied custom cakes.

    https://www.thedailybeast.com/lgbt-rights-are-under-attack-america-needs-the-equality-acturgently

    “All over the country the backlash to LGBT rights is getting bolder—more outrageous and more vitriolic—while anti-LGBT evangelical leaders, working within the base of the GOP, continue their attempts to disguise a religious crusade against fellow Americans as as struggle for “religious liberty.” “

    1. The Last American Hero

      If such things happen, it’s because they didn’t stop with equal rights or tolerance or acceptance and had to push for endorsement.

    2. Rhywun

      “We noticed you’re using an ad-blocker”

      Good, now watch me never visit your garbage-site again.

    3. Suthenboy

      Horseshit. I am at the point where I just assume all of these attacks are staged.

    4. grrizzly

      That’s Michelangelo Signorile. He’s never been sane.

    5. DrOtto

      Aren’t most anti-LGBT evangelicals leader some of the biggest closeted gays?

      1. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

        Most? Nah.

        There may be some who have–the ones that made the most noise, maybe.

        *drawing a distinction between historical/orthodox beliefs and actually “going after” any/all LGBT groups.

  38. Spudalicious

    I don’t know if we’ve discussed this before, I was probably drunk, but I want one.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QkNVYz9uajU

    1. CPRM

      I linked it like last week, but it’s cool enough to watch again.

      1. CPRM

        I need a replica of Robocop’s gun like that.

      2. Spudalicious

        Ah! That was it. I was pretty sure it was here.

  39. Not sure if anyone posted this link this morning – https://www.wacotrib.com/news/twin-peaks-biker-shooting/no-one-will-answer-for-twin-peaks-shootings-after-da/article_124b9c6f-d3ab-581b-bb85-56ed33560735.html

    Carrizal’s case, tried in Waco’s 54th State District Court, ended in mistrial in November 2017, with most of the jurors in his case favoring acquittal. No other defendant has been tried since.

    Johnson’s campaign hammered Reyna for his handling of the Twin Peaks cases, and he won the March 2018 Republican primary by 20 percentage points. After the primary, Reyna dismissed all but 24 of the remaining Twin Peaks cases.

    The special prosecutors appointed to handle four cases in which Reyna recused his office dismissed those cases by early this year. One of the prosecutors called Reyna’s mass prosecution strategy a “harebrained scheme” that was “patently offensive.”

    Reyna’s office re-indicted the remaining two dozen, mostly on riot charges. Other charges that may have been possible arising out of the melee, such as attempted murder, aggravated assault or felon in possession of a firearm, were barred by three-year statutes of limitation before Johnson took office, Johnson said.

    “Following the indictments, the prior district attorney had the time and opportunity to review and assess the admissible evidence to determine the full range of charges that could be brought against each individual who participated in the Twin Peaks brawl, and to charge only those offenses where the admissible evidence would support a verdict of guilt beyond a reasonable doubt,” Johnson said in a statement.

    “In my opinion, had this action been taken in a timely manner, it would have, and should have, resulted in numerous convictions and prison sentences against many of those who participated in the Twin Peaks brawl. Over the next three years the prior district attorney failed to take that action, for reasons that I do not know to this day,” he said.

    Judge Ralph Strother of Waco’s 19th State District Court put a halt to all Twin Peaks proceedings in his courtroom after Reyna’s defeat, saying he wanted to give Johnson a chance to come in and evaluate the cases.

    “I’m not shedding any tears today that all of this is finally over,” Strother said of the Twin Peaks criminal saga.

    Interesting that the current DA ran on this case – specifically because the guy who started things did such a shitty job with it – sounds like some common sense…

    1. The Last American Hero

      I heard the FBI was assigning some guy named Cooper to figure out what really happened.

      1. Not Adahn

        The gum he liked came back in style.

  40. Scruffy Nerfherder

    To bad it’s a private company, it would make for a nice short right about now.

    https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2019-04-03/sorry-wall-streeters-you-now-need-to-earn-your-patagonia-vests

    1. slumbrew

      Let’s politicize everything. Douches.

    2. Spudalicious

      If I bought Patagonia products, I would be upset. But I don’t, so…

    3. Juvenile Bluster

      …are they trying to go bankrupt? “Let’s eliminate 95% of our possible business from the pipeline. What could possibly go wrong?”

      1. Rhywun

        I love the bit about “mission-driven companies that prioritize the planet” – as if eeeevul Wall Street doesn’t generate a shit-ton of wealth that makes a lot of that feel-good crap possible.

      2. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

        Hold that thought, JB:

        but current customers shouldn’t fret. Existing corporate customers will remain in the program and still be able to order more branded items from Patagonia.

        “I mean, we don’t want to actually LOSE business with our stridency stance.”

        Surely there are plenty of other companies that produce items that are just as good, and, possibly cheaper? Yeah, yeah–Patagonia is image, and all that shit…

    4. wdalasio

      Frankly, I’ve always thought the Patagonia fleeces looked pretty damned idiotic. They’re the outfit of the kid a couple of years out of B-school who wants to look “corporate hip”. If you’re actually a manager, you go with the Barbour or go home.

      1. Gustave Lytton

        It’s corporate logoed clothing they sell to companies.

    5. B.P.

      “We’re in business to save our home planet.”

      At least they’re humble.

      1. Suthenboy

        They are in business to make money. I suspect this will prove to be a misstep.

      2. We’re in business to save our home planet.”

        Did they get approval from other planets too? If not, how earthnocentric.

  41. Greetings from sunny Orlando. *swoon*

    Kmele lights the GILMORE signal

    1. slumbrew

      He is correct. He is, however, wrong about his white sneakers looking good with a suit – I don’t care how much those cost, that still looks stupid.

      1. BakedPenguin

        ‘white sneakers looking good with a suit’

        Jeebus, how could anyone think this? At least get a pair of black loafers.

        1. Mad Scientist

          I know, right? And after Labor Day? Like, OMG.

    2. B.P.

      Okay, why is it that when I click on one of your all’s twitter links, the time stamps and such are in Cyrillic? Am I being Russian colluded?

      1. Не знаю. Я это не вижу.

        1. Rhywun

          Me neither.

        2. B.P.

          My God, I’m seeing it everywhere!

          1. Tundra

            B.P. is a Deep State operative.

    3. Scruffy Nerfherder

      Greetings Pomp

      Say hi to Mickey for me

      AND BY SAY HI MEAN….

    1. BakedPenguin

      You don’t science, obviously.

    2. Suthenboy

      Now see, that’s just not believable at all. She got the subtraction right? Swing and a miss.

      1. Yusef drives a Kia

        When I was a kid, it was the New Ice Age coming, if this is global warming, I’m not seeing it. SoCal temps have been lower on average for at least twenty years, and I’m sorry, I want my warmth back, thank you very much,

        1. Subwoofer

          I remember my dad complaining about horrific winters with blizzards that shut down his college campus for a week because nobody could get into the neighborhood. Restaurants and grocery stores closed due to lack of food.

          He said back then everyone was saying global cooling would kill us all and we were basically in a mini ice age.

          Wouldn’t a little global warming be a *good* thing if that was the baseline? Its not like the Medieval Warm Period or the carboniferous period were marked by climate cataclysms (dinosaur killing asteriods notwithstanding).

          1. Fatty Bolger

            Of course warmth is better for life. It just adds another level of silliness to the global warming alarmism. At least global cooling would be a serious problem. And it *is* going to happen someday, we just can’t say exactly when.

        2. BakedPenguin

          When I was a kid, it was the New Ice Age coming

          Yup I remember hearing that.

          I can believe there’s warming going on, but being caused by humans? Fucking prove it. Especially with the late 90’s pause.

          1. Rhywun

            And the current two-year decline.

          2. BakedPenguin

            Hide the decline!!

            And no, this isn’t referencing any actual emails that came out of actual “sciencing” places that allegedly science on global warming or nothing. Nope. Because they’re all on the up and up.

          3. Subwoofer

            The fact that those private emails were leaked (probably by Russians) means we should ignore their content and focus on how we can blame climate deniers for colluding to interfere with the elec… er, scientific process.

          4. Subwoofer

            A few years ago there was a report by NASA that Mars appeared to be experiencing some global warming. Silly me thought that would show CAGW activists the Sun was likely responsible for any actual climate changes we witnessed.

            Nope. Memory holed.

    3. Fatty Bolger

      Fantastic. Did they hire all the good Onion writers or something?

  42. Tundra

    This just rolled around on Spotify.

    SpaceX should license.

  43. kinnath

    Youtube just queued up this tune from Dead South. I’m digging it.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e3UfPXAowDg

    1. BakedPenguin

      Dead South is a good band. Whenever I hear “new country” I want to vomit. Fucking new pop songs with a twang vocal, and occasional slide guitar.

      If you havn’t already heard them, check out Turnpike Troubadours. Especially this song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uTYq66Tx1GY

      1. OUTLAW COUNTRY!!! No seriously if you Sirius/XM the Outlaw Country channel rocks (so to speak)

      2. Rhywun

        I luv Turnpike Troubadours thanks to one of you reprobates but honest question: what differentiates them from “new country”?

        1. BakedPenguin

          “New country” bands wouldn’t have a fiddle player.

          “New country” bands may well have a keyboardist

          “New country” bands would have songs with “crossover pop” appeal

          “New country” bands songs’ suck.

          Those are my 4 reasons

          1. Rhywun

            Sounds about right.

            PS. I wonder how much shit they catch from the title of this one – another of my faves.

          2. Gustave Lytton

            One time new country

            https://youtu.be/

            New country” bands would have songs with “crossover pop” appeal

            Conway Twitty.

            I remember when New Country was a return to more traditional country sound and rejection of the pop turn of the 70’s and 80’s. (But even that era’s popish country is far superior to today’s crap country)

      3. Stillhunter

        I agree, love these guys. Lots of good music like this out there right now.

  44. Heroic Mulatto

    God, I hate Karen!

    So I walk up to this bitch (apparently right after she got divorced) and say “what’s up Karen you wanna go for a jog this afternoon haha” and she’s like “please just leave me alone” and I’m like “whatever bitch” and then like an hour later get called into our HR person’s office and they’re like “you gotta stop harassing Karen she’s going through a lot right now, she’s just signed her divorce papers”

    And I’m like “hah who’d married that skank, someone with a wheelchair fetish?” And my HR person (Hank) was well like “come on man, they’ve been married for 16 years. They’ve been having trouble since her accident last year. She thinks he blames her for getting into the accident that killed their kids” and I’m all like lol

    So I leave and I’m hungry so I go to grab my lunch (turkey and provolone) only to see, lo and behold, that dumb bitch Karen set her bag of lunch RIGHT in front of mine!! so I write out a note saying how glad I am to be working with her but if she puts her lunch in front of mine again I swear to fuck I will finish the job that God couldn’t

    So I go through the rest of my day joking around with Karen every time I see her even though she is I giant cunt about it (my favorite was ‘accidently’ dropping a pair of scissors on her colostomy bag lol) and I have to ignore the picture of that fucking rat whenever I walk by her desk

    So I finish my day asking for her ex husband’s number since I need a new wingman to look for some babes with and she fucking flips it and when she’s yelling at me I’m all like “maybe if you don’t want to get divorced you shouldn’t have gotten hit by a drink driver you ever think of that bitch” and then she rolled away aggressively

    So that was my Wednesday. How was yours?

    1. I thought I made it clear that I don’t start reading series unless they are already finished.

    2. Rhywun

      Not that alpha.

    3. Brochettaward

      “maybe if you don’t want to get divorced you shouldn’t have gotten hit by a drink driver you ever think of that bitch”

      It’s like I always say. The problem is too many sober people.

      1. Sean

        Not in this household.

      2. Brochettaward

        And, seriously, has anyone ever met a Karen who wasn’t completely fucking insufferable? Nobody ever asks what the Karen’s of the world did wrong.

        1. BakedPenguin

          Sorry, Bro. I’ve known a few Karens who were pretty cool. Different life paths, and all that.

        2. hayeksplosives

          I enjoy the cat / Karen memes.

          https://images.app.goo.gl/DeVwYBUY5cqmBkBv5

  45. KibbledKristen

    ERMAHGERD FERGED ERN FER* is back tonight!!

    *For the old farts: “oh my god, Forged in Fire”

    1. Tulip

      I love that show!

      1. KibbledKristen

        I love all the testosterone on the show, but my favorite winner was the chick, Kelly. SHe kind of reminds me of me, only way tougher.

    2. Spudalicious

      Awesome! “Your knife, it will keeel.”

  46. KibbledKristen

    Baseball Twitter is the worst Twitter. Especially when people you follow for other reasons start Tweetering about it 24 fucking 7.

    1. You could have stopped at “Baseball is the worst”. 😉

      1. BakedPenguin

        Of course you think that, Ted. Because the Yankees suck.

        1. Old Man With Candy

          Just because they lost a series to the Orioles?

          1. Spudalicious

            Can’t think of a more glaring example.

          2. BakedPenguin

            Just dogging an NY resident about their baseball team. NH residents don’t have to pay sales or income tax, but they do have perform some basic functions.

          3. BakedPenguin

            Probably chose a bad year to do it, though.

            Jeebus, the Sox pitching this year is horrible.

    2. Heroic Mulatto

      Ok, but even fucking Jacob deGrom hit a home run today vs. the Marlins.

      1. KibbledKristen

        Who’s in the what now?

    3. KibbledKristen

      Call me in Oct only if the Twins are still in it

      1. Tundra

        I can tell you right now.

        Out.

        1. BakedPenguin

          Tough news, Kirby Fuckett. In your favor is the fact that the Sox and Yankees are sucking up the field right now. If that continues, wide open field (NPI).

          1. Tundra

            The division has been shit for years. Doesn’t matter.

          2. BakedPenguin

            Dude, right now it’s TB Rays > BAL Orioles > TOR Blue Jays > NY Yankees > BOS Red Sox in the AL EAST.

            The Sox look to suck this year, with horrible pitching. Like a rerun of 1977 – some lumber, no arms. The Yankees (I hate to say) may have just gotten off to a bad start. But so long as they eventually lose, too, I’m okay with that.

  47. Vacuous Insight

    I have a habit of reading headlines and not clicking to read the articles. This week I thought Bieber made a joke announcing that he was pregnant and I thought the media outrage was from him making a self-deprecating trans joke.

  48. LJW

    For those of you familiar with KC BBQ. The local favorite Joe’s partnered with a popular local pizza joint Minskys to make a BBQ pizza. It is amazing. I’m gonna put on 50 pounds before this limited time offer ends.

  49. Sean

    I meant to come home and rant about people not moving to the right hand lane tonight on the highway. I came home and got drunk instead.

    1. I find it best to combine the two.

      1. Sean

        I got to a happy place and lost the edge. ?

        1. Gustave Lytton

          Huzzah!

  50. Speaking of rants, fuck the assholes who let their dogs roam the neighborhood, whether because they don’t maintain their invisible fence or because they let the dogs out in the yard unattended.

    Had a fucking bulldog charging my 1 year old in my front yard. He was about 10 feet from having his head severed from his body with a shovel.

    1. Brochettaward

      I prefer children to dogs, so I’m torn here.

      1. Brochettaward

        Sorry, that should be reversed. Dogs > children.

    2. Old Man With Candy

      Had a fucking bulldog charging my 1 year old in my front yard. He was about 10 feet from having his head severed from his body with a shovel.

      Why would you do that to your 1 year old? I mean, he’ll get better around animals as he gets older.

      1. Heroic Mulatto

        Because he can’t make another dog, but he can make another kid.

        1. Just tried, wish me luck! ???

          1. Heroic Mulatto

            Mazel tov!

      2. Spudalicious

        That does seem a little harsh.

        1. It’s a dog eat dog world, and if you’re not an alpha, then you’re just a little slithery snake. You know what we do to snakes? We chop off their heads with shovels.

    3. Tundra

      Do you know the owner?

      1. Some yes, some no. Over the past 6 months, dogs from at least 4 different houses have ended up in my yard causing various levels of mischief. The most common offender was the next door neighbor, but his dogs are old, so they’re not very aggressive. He just replaced his invisible fence, so those dogs shouldn’t be an issue anymore.

        1. Spudalicious

          That drives me nuts. We have an invisible fence around the property and I still make sure I know where the dogs are. We have neighbors who just let their dogs out and they roam around. We had one neighbor who found out why their rescue dogs were rescue dogs. They would come over the three rail fence and charge any dog they saw. After a couple of letters, they had to add wire mesh and extend it above the top of the fence. Just as bad is the people who walk their dogs off leash. People have found out the hard way to control their animals so the don’t come onto our property. Big dog does not suffer fools gladly.

          1. hayeksplosives

            I am tired of neighbors walking their dogs in my residential area and casually letting the dogs way out in the middle of the street or even off the leash.

            They are confident they’ll hear any car coming (they tend to walk on the right, against all advice) but they haven’t realized that electric cars are everywhere now. Sometimes I honk quickly, sometimes I roll down the windows so they’ll hear AC/DC blasting and look behind them.

            Natural. Selection.

          2. Our dog lost his voice about a year ago (he’s getting old), so he’s not much of a deterrent anymore (even before, his bark was the only intimidating part about him) . I’m the only functional deterrent to keep my wife, daughter, and pets safe now. I don’t suffer fools gladly either. I do so with shovels, steel toed boots, and if the message isn’t received, lead pellets traveling at transsonic speeds.

    4. LJW

      We have a similar problem with our neighbors who have a rotting fence and 2 rather aggressive pitbulls. Recently they busted through the fence and chased our other neighbors cat into their house damaging some things in the process. Those dogs would have been dead if they came in my house.

      1. I try to be as gracious as I can. Our dog has gotten away from us before. Our dog has acted aggressively before. Shit happens.

        However, when you show no interest in the whereabouts of your unleashed unsupervised dog for 15 or 20 minutes each and every day, my patience wears out. That describes more than 2 of my neighbors.

      2. mikey

        My wife and two-year-old were at the beach. She was reading and the kid was playing in the sand making engine noises while running his toy cars across our dog’s back (a rescue shepard/greyhound mix). The dog felt his mission in life was to protect our kid.
        A woman walks by with an unleased shepherd that ambles over and raises his ruff and gives our dog a bared-teeth growl. Charlies isn’t much for BS. In an instant he had the shepherd on his back with his neck in the jaws of death. At the same time he was raking the shepherd’s belly with his rear claws. He was going for the kill. The woman starts screaming. My wife says “Charlie, Stop That.” Charlie goes and sits between our kid and the shepherd that runs off howling. The woman continues screaming at my wife who just says “Control your dog. Next time I won’t call mine off.” and goes back to reading.

        1. I want a dog like that. Ive only had the toddler-like ankle biter dogs inherited when I married my wife. The idea of a dog that is well trained, big enough to defend the house/family, and protective sounds amazing.

          1. mikey

            He was an incredible dog. Loved to run. I’d take him along the beach and he’d run off as fast as he could go (which was really fast) and then turn and run back and look at me with disappoinment that I couldn’t keep up. The off he’d go again.

        2. Gustave Lytton

          Awww. What a great dog.

          Our mini-Aussie normally a sweet little thing, went protective of my wife at the dry cleaners one time. They couldn’t find some clothes and my wife was pissed at that and their excuses (more the second). Came back to the truck and was seething. Then went back inside when they found them. Our doggie bolted from the truck and ran after her looking for the threat.

  51. Has anyone seen Unplanned yet? I’m wondering if it’s a decent movie or a typical over the top Christian movie.

    1. Spudalicious

      From what I’ve been reading, they avoided the preachy end of Christian movies.

      1. Tundra

        Same. I’m still trying to decide if I want to see it.

      1. Spudalicious

        It backfired bigtime. They now have more followers than Planned Parenthood.

    2. Will probably stream this eventually – still need to catch up on Gosnell myself. Talk about your media blackouts.

    3. Pope Jimbo

      I had planned on going to see it last weekend. Had all the bases covered. Then something came up and I had to abort the mission

      1. Pope Jimbo

        BTW I was in my driveway just about to pull out when I had to abort.

        1. My bowling team name was the Pull Out Method, our slogan was “we’re effective 80% of the time”

  52. Not Adahn

    Toys!

    I got these in the mail today

    https://lokgrips.com/gun-grips/cz/cz-shadow-2/palm-swell/bogies/cz-shadow-2-palm-swell-bogies-blue/

    I only put the one on the side for my shooting hand (I’ve only got one palm in contact with the gun after all), and it’s like I’m goddamned Spider Man.

    The color is not nearly as bright as my monitor makes them out to be, but still kind of crayola-colored. Whatchagonnado? They’re G10.

    1. Spudalicious

      Srsly, how many pairs of shoes does one gun need?

      1. Not Adahn

        These shoes actually make the gun seem lighter somehow. I’m guessing it’s because I’m not having to work as much to keep it still. Before to really lock it down, I was having to be very deliberate about getting the backstrap between the muscle groups and applying a lot of pressure both in and back with my support hand. Now, I can keep it immobile just using the two lower fingers on the sooting hand, like I was holding a sword.

    2. Tundra

      I have always been a big supporter of having proper and accommodating grips for all of the sports I’ve played. I always took my time in selecting the right baseball bat that had the best grip for my hand size, to say nothing of the grip size for my tennis racket and the proper rubberized grips that would allow me the best topspin and slice on the court. As a Canadian, I can’t remember the time I didn’t play hockey. My grip on the but of the stick was always chiseled and fashioned so that I could handle the puck with a single hand and still have wrist mobility to maneuver the puck. Now that graphite sticks are in use, I still cut my stick down and place a wooden plug in the end so that I can use some tools and trim it down to my needs. So what does this all have to do with handgun grips?

      Uh, ok.

      1. Not Adahn

        Canadian grips he says?

        1. Tundra

          Actually those are pretty nice!

  53. Michael

    Mini rant: One of the officer level people at the firm I work at submitted a VERY URGENT REQUEST to me over the weekend. He wanted to know where some old project data was stored so he could use it to compile a SUPER DUPER IMPORTANT PROPOSAL. The request arrived to my inbox at 6:30 in the morning on a Saturday morning, and I was able to dig up the location remotely and provide it to him within an hour while sitting in a Home Depot parking lot waiting to start on a personal, labor intensive weekend project. After that…silence. No thanks, no acknowledgement, nothing. The tone for what I had hoped would be an enjoyable weekend was now set. This is the same asshole that has an acute tendency to get irate at low level support staff over problems caused by stupid decisions made by upper management. Why am I telling you this? It’s because dickhead extraordinaire here has adopted corporate wokeness as one of his guiding principles. Every so often you can catch him yammering on about how there should be more social justice initiatives or whatever the fuck idiotic idea gets stuck bouncing around in his empty skull for a fleeting moment. This week I took a look at a pinup board that’s been sitting in one of our common areas all of last month to commemorate International Women’s Month. I normally avoid entertaining such brainless virtue signaling as it is far too frequent of an occurrence at my workplace, but this time I took a peek as it was propped up right next to the coffee machine. It featured portraits and mini-bios of the usual feminist heavy hitters like Angela Merkel, Michelle Obama, Marie Curie and…wait, who’s this? Well, it’s none other than the aforementioned halfwit’s own teenage daughters being proclaimed pillars of their community with no explanation given. I was very tempted to cobble together a bio of Elizabeth Bathory to pin up right next to theirs, but my better angels managed to grab the wheel. Where the fuck do people like this come from?

    1. That’s pretty awful. However, it definitely fits my biases about egotistical SJWs driving corporate wokeness. The corporate wokeness is getting out of hand. No, I don’t need 4 emails a day about women’s month. No, I don’t need implicit bias training. No, I don’t need to receive a biweekly inclusion and diversity newsletter bitching about how I don’t attend the monthly diversity and inclusion roundtable. Let me do my work and pay me a fucking salary. Leave the preaching for the pulpit.

        1. Michael

          And the long march through the institutions continues apace.

      1. Pope Jimbo

        Leave the preaching for the pulpit

        I always wonder how many of them are such miserable people that their non-work life is empty of friends and companions. Who wants to hang out with assholes voluntarily?

        So they look at work as a great place because they can force people to sit and listen to them.

        1. Who wants to hang out with assholes voluntarily?

          To be fair, we all hang out here.

          1. Spudalicious

            But you’re all Tulpa, so the only asshole here is me. Wait…

      2. Gustave Lytton

        Amen.

        One of the more insidious parts is it minimizes actual accomplishment and substitutes identity. See Marie Curie above. Same with an exec at our company who has an interesting & impressive record, whether she was a woman or a man, but instead gets relegated to the woman’s month.

    2. Rhywun

      I wonder if some industries are more woke than others. My ex-company (finance, ~7500 employees) had none of this; I mean, nothing beyond the occasional web training exercise that everybody made fun of.

      1. It’s even department by department. I’ve worked at 3 large tech companies, and the wokeness of legal is off the charts compared to engineering. Granted, much of the corporate wokeness seems to have sprung up while I was in law school, so it may not be an apples to apples comparison.

        1. hayeksplosives

          Yeah, we engineers are a practical bunch bent on provable facts.

          But there’s something wrong with us, you see, not them.

          1. mikey

            We also have to come up with something that works. HR can never “work”.

          2. This.

            There seem to be whole career paths built around changing shit for no apparent reason.

          3. Rhywun

            Yeah – “management”.

        2. Rhywun

          It’s even department by department.

          Yeah. When I say “everybody” I mean my colleagues in IT – we generally don’t have any patience for stupid shit like that. I don’t really talk to any other departments except for work issues of course.

  54. Completely random thought….

    What’s the minimum est mass required for a shaped, guided carbon rod dropped from about 80k feet to cause catastrophic damage to say….a semi truck/trailer? Just bouncing some ideas…

    1. Rhywun

      I have… no idea. *slowly backs away*

    2. hayeksplosives

      What is the “catastrophic” damage you’re looking for? Knowing the desired kinetic energy you want on target is important.

      Don’t know what you’re working on, but being able to dispense fragments just before impact is helpful. Would need some high explosive content though, but not much.

      If you’re going to just drop the rod, better aim for something vital on the vehicle.

      Velocitas Eradico

      1. hayeksplosives

        So if you just let it drop free fall, it will take 70.5 seconds to travel 80k feet (ignoring friction). Terminal velocity will be 691.6m/s (2269 ft/sec).

        Kinetic energy is 1/2 mass times velocity squared.

        So solve for mass by 2x the desired kinetic energy divided by 691.6 m/s squared and you’ll get your answer in kilograms.

        A stick of dynamite is about one megajoule of energy. So I randomly picked 5megajoules and got 20kg as an answer.

        I recommend tungsten.

        1. Chafed

          If anyone here was going to (seriously) answer that question I knew it would be you.

          1. hayeksplosives

            Oops. If the question was a joke, it went right over my head. Or apparently through my heard from the top down 😛 at 691.6 m/s.

            This topic has nothing to do with my job at all. (Clears throat and fades away with Rhywun)…

          2. I assumed it was a joke. Either that or LT_Fish is a Bond villain.

          3. LJW

            Maybe he’s going after a road runner?

          4. hayeksplosives

            Everyone knows ACME tungsten is the best tungsten!

          5. Thanks for the calculations. Just some random thoughts for the future…options, alternatives, wargaming, etc. Heard some outside the box thinking from one party and thought I’d take it a bit further.

          6. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

            LT, you’re still up? Wait–are you even State-side, or just up early (or, whatevs)?

        2. kinnath

          Excellent work

          1. hayeksplosives

            Why thank you. Now we just have to drop them from weather balloons because 80k feet is waaaay up there.

          2. hayeksplosives

            Take a really deep breath before launch!

            Wear clean underwear!

          3. CPRM

            Whale Oil has nothing on Whale Milk.

        3. AlmightyJB

          Hayeksplosives is awesome. That is all.

          1. slumbrew

            It is known.

          2. hayeksplosives

            I didn’t know I could still blush, but you guys managed to make me do so!

    3. Chafed

      Is this for something fictional you’re working on or is the Navy looking for an alternative to rail guns?

      1. Spudalicious

        Mass destruction of supply convoys from space?

      2. mikey

        It’s been thought of. “Orbital bombardment systems with conventional warheads are permitted under the terms of SALT II. Some of the proposed systems rely on large tungsten carbide/uranium cermet rods dropped from orbit and depend on kinetic energy, rather than explosives, but their mass makes them prohibitively difficult to transport to orbit.”
        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Space_weapon?wprov=sfla1

        1. kinnath

          Just need to build the space elevator first.

          1. hayeksplosives

            Nah, Elon will have cheap transport of the rods up there in no time.

            Unfortunately India might have inadvertently set us up for this already by blowing up one of their own satellites as a show of strength. But it broke into 44 fragments, some of which went in orbit ABOVE the ISS, so they could conceivably strike it on their decay back to Earth.

          2. kinnath

            So we just need to take a trash compactor up to orbit and pick up all the shit that is already there. Two birds; one stone.

          3. slumbrew

            A FOAF was working on pushing space debris out of the way with lasers. That’s some futuristic shit right there.

          4. hayeksplosives

            Space junk is becoming a big problem. We’re looking at all kinds of things to either destroy it outright or push it down into the atmosphere to burn on re entry.

            The Russkies on the other hand, launch satellites that sneak up on other satellites and either jam their comms or physically shove them off orbit.

          5. Spudalicious

            There’s an autonomous mini shuttle circling the planet for a year and a half at a time. Hmm, wonder what it could be doing…

    4. mindyourbusiness

      Back in 1975, Jerry Pournelle described something like what you imagined. http://www.technovelgy.com/ct/content.asp?Bnum=1582

      1. hayeksplosives

        My first husband got me onto pournelle. Liked most of it, but it got formulaic.

    5. LJW

      For some reason this discussion caused this to pop into my head.

      https://youtu.be/vxsPLXX1QLI

      1. hayeksplosives

        OMG never saw it. Hilarious.

        1. slumbrew

          That series is, often, gold. I adore it.

          1. hayeksplosives

            Ah! A comedy call-back from up thread to boot!

            Lol.

      2. AlmightyJB

        Wow

    6. Suthenboy

      Orbital kinetic weapons – This isnt something you can call up on an instants notice. Slingshot the damned thing around the moon and get it up to meteor speeds…17-20K fps(average).
      If you are going to use something like that then dont fuck around. Go whole hog.

      1. hayeksplosives

        All options are on the table. 😉

        I simply answered the question that was asked.

    1. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

      Really? I mean, to each his/her own, but I’m intrigued.

  55. Heroic Mulatto

    Hey guys I haven’t been open to you about this, but I’ve been building up the strength to say this so…oh boy here it goes:

    Over the past 2 years I have suffered from chronic masturbation syndrome (CMS). Every morning I wake up and beat my meat at least 6 times in a row and every night I slaughter my sausage until 3 in the morning. At my worst points, I can’t hold back my crying, but it’s like I can’t stop myself, so I cry as I masturbate in the dark. It’s gotten so bad that my mom cries herself to sleep every night knowing I suffer this way. I don’t even clean up anymore, so my bed is drenched with penis juice. Some even got into the carpet. My porn history keeps getting worse. It’s not even vanilla stuff anymore. I’ve started jacking off Shadman hentai on 8chan. You can’t even find pornhub a million lines down my history. It’s so bad, a well curved Prius turns me on. And the worst part is: I have lost so much skin on my dick that it’s infected with gangrene, I think. My dick actively goes limp when I grab it. My body rejects, but I can’t stop. There’s no stopping in sight. There’s no future for me.

    Help.

    1. slumbrew

      Just the last 2 years? Huh.

      1. Chafed

        What Brock Slumbrew said. I’m really skeptical of the time frame.

    2. Are these things not normal?

    3. blackjack

      Get a grip, MAN!

        1. Rhywun

          Heh nice

    4. LJW

      Ummm I don’t even know how to respond to this. Maybe ask your doctor for some Clindamycin lotion to take care of the gangrene while also providing lubrication…

    5. Rhywun

      Step away from the Japanese car commercials.

    6. AlmightyJB

      Well you should be getting plenty of blood supply so probably not gangrene. You may be developing a mutant super dick which is good. I think you should cash out your retriement savings and spend it on escorts to give you oral. Go to oral until you feel well enough to go back to constant masterbation, switch back and forth as necessary. As far as porn goes, you just need to push yourself, you CAN go further. Have you tried speedballs along with erotic asphyxiation? Also, get one of those vibrating tongues for your ass, that should help you cum faster and reduce wear and tear. Must importantly, stay hydrated.

      1. slumbrew

        And they say it’s impossible to get good advice on the internet.

      2. Heroic Mulatto

        My pancreatic cancer plan is to liquidate everything and head down to that Sex Island off the coast of Colombia for a bender of hookers, viagra, and ayahuasca until either the cancer or brain aneurysm takes me.

        What’s your pancreatic cancer plan?

        1. slumbrew

          That sounds like a solid plan, minus the ayahuasca. I can’t imagine that much self-reflection would be… healthy? in your case. Or my case. Really, I’m not sure any of us should do that.

          1. Heroic Mulatto

            It is the way of my people.

          2. Brochettaward

            The mulattos or the sexual deviants?

          3. Chafed

            Which book of the Torah is that in?

        2. AlmightyJB

          You know they can remove your pancreas now. You should still do the trip, but have your pancreas removed first.

    7. Spudalicious

      There’s a future for you. Google “One armed man”.

  56. CPRM

    Hey Chafed, do you know my e-mail? I’ve got something I want an opinion on, I’d ask Digby, but he’s been late the last few nights.

    1. CPRM

      I mean, I have your e-mail from patreon, just look out for an e-mail with my handle in it, it might go in your spam.

      1. Chafed

        Will do.

    2. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

      I’d ask Digby, but he’s been late the last few nights.

      Or, maybe–just maybe–you’ve been early…?

      C’mon, I gotta work, and there’s so many damnable early posts I gotta work my way through.

      I can’t help it if I find you lot interesting, and want to see what clever things you say.

      /I actually managed to type that without laughing my ass off

    1. Chafed

      Did they release anything else or are they a one hit wonder?

  57. CPRM

    After watching this I know what I need, makes me feel like Q. I probably need a shower now.

    1. slumbrew

      She was dope, but all I remember Bitch, not that track.

      1. CPRM

        I gave that album many listens, but I’ll admit it was spurred on by the videos not as much the music.

        1. slumbrew

          I’m pretty sure I owned that CD, but it looks like I didn’t bother ripping it.

          Aimee Mann was more my jam at that time – and even still.

          1. CPRM

            The song was so slow and it said ‘I’m with Stupid’ in the picture, so I just wanted to listen to Static-X

          2. slumbrew

            That’s about the slowest song on a slow album. Not sure anything will really be to your liking, but maybe Choice In The Matter, or maybe the “hit” from that album, That’s Just What You Are.

            De gustibus, just not in a headbanging mood.

          3. CPRM

            I can tolerate a slow dong from a band I like, but it has to be earned and catchy.

  58. CPRM

    Dust for Life was a Rock band, but the last song on their first album came to mind from the country music talk above.

    1. CPRM

      Their big song was Step Into the Light, if you were wondering.

  59. Hammercorps

    Probably already been posted, but for you metalheads out there, Sabaton announced a new album yesterday.

  60. CPRM

    I’ve seen man ‘Huzzah’s recently. That’s how I respond to SF posts, did I start something, or did I join something?

    1. CPRM

      I meant to say ‘many ‘Huzzahs” didn’t mean to be sexist.

    2. Gustave Lytton

      It seems to work with monocles, top hats, spats, and orphans.

      1. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

        monocles, top hats, spats, and orphans.

        I would hope those work on womyn’s Huzzahs

        OK, maybe not the orphans…..

        /They can watch

  61. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

    Well, since it seems everyone has buggered off, I’m going to presume that it’s because you’re all getting well-deserved sleep (Hayeksplosives? Baked Penguin? I’m looking at you…)

    1. BakedPenguin

      Ha HA! You are wrong, pitiable fool. I’m wide awake to defeat your dastardly plan against humanity!

      1. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

        “He didn’t count on me: Lemming. Arthur Lemming, of the British Dental Association.”

        /I’ll be damned, but I can’t find that whole sketch online.

        1. BakedPenguin

          That’s okay, well remembered from many nights in my teens.

          The only use for PBS, IMHO – prior to the advent of streaming. Monty Python was great until its’ 6th season, which we can avoid speaking of.

          1. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

            “6th season”

            6? I am only aware of them doing four, when Cleese left, mostly.

            Otherwise, my dvd set is missing some shit.

          2. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

            Point taken about MP/PBS.

            I did discover more Brit stuff once I started watching, though

            The DFW station loves to brag about being the station that brought Flying Circus to the states. So, I got that going for where I live.

            That, and the whole Kennedy thing.

            /not her…him!

          3. BakedPenguin

            Looks like you’re right, if Wikipedia is to be believed (and it’s a non-political issue, so probably). OK, their last few shows sucked.

            The Kennedy comment is kinda ..uh…spicy, even for me.Let me diffuse this with my mighty powers of Internets.

            Huzzah!

          4. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

            Smoking, even!

          5. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

            And yes, I do mean her.

            /didn’t realize until after….too soon?

          6. BakedPenguin

            I’m not bothered. Kennedy is a hot, libertarian woman. *clears throat*

          7. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

            Yes, that tends to happen quite a bit with ladies who even nominally espouse liberty/freedom. (lucky us!)

            Also, teachers. But that’s a whole different issue.

          8. BakedPenguin

            Yeah, have you seen Liberty Doll? https://www.youtube.com/user/libertydollshouse
            or Blonde? https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCpbyOgUSjTSPpvVUAT2OyHw

            The ‘right’ gets fewer wamen, but they definitely seem to be higher quality. The awesomeness of the ones around here are proof for me.

          9. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

            Yes, we have some outstanding sheilas here. Crikey! (couldn’t resist)

            I think I’ve seen Blonde recently, but wasn’t aware of her.

            Liberty Doll is new, so, thank you for the direction!

          10. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

            Ugh.. aware = familiar.

            And, “new to me”.

  62. BakedPenguin

    Also, Lauren Chen, Lauren Southern… etc.

    1. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

      I like Southern a bit, but, she’s either getting a really bum rap by others (go figure, but I do mean REALLY), or she dances closer to alt-right than I am fully comfortable with. Granted, I haven’t watched a lot of her, and everyone will eventually have some “Gotcha” moments.

      /no true libertarian, and all that

      I will definitely check out their channels.

      1. BakedPenguin

        I’ll grant your point about L Southern – she’s definitely not libertarian, but she’s 1) hot, and 2) usually worth listening to. I’m dubious about her being truly alt-right. (Note: I could be wrong/ open to evidence, etc.) Still, I understand where you’re coming from.

        IIRC, Lauren Chen and Blonde were both libertarians before moving to more traditional conservative positions. I think immigration (specifically illegal immigration) was a big issue for both of them. They’re also both really hot, and they have good ideas

        1. l0b0t

          I often enjoy the live podcast by Blonde and Matt Christiansen – Beauty & The Beta. Blonde seems, to my mind anyway, to harbor some smoldering Jew hatred dislike that seeps out occasionally in her commentary. Not outright animus a la Minister Farrakhan but more some good old fashioned Bircher style fear of a shadowy cabal of Red Sea Pedestrians.

          1. BakedPenguin

            I haven’t noticed that, although I have heard her say that she doesn’t care for Ben Shapiro.

          2. l0b0t

            I could quite easily be misreading her; I am, admittedly, sensitive to that sort of thing. And to be fair, there are any number of reasons to dislike Shapiro.

          3. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

            I like the little putz. I generally prefer to see him argue vs other…what, pundits? He seems to have a pretty good sense of humor, which usually makes him worlds more tolerable than his opponents.

          4. BakedPenguin

            “He seems to have a pretty good sense of humor, which usually makes him worlds more tolerable than his opponents.”

            Second.

          5. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

            Matt, I’m somewhat familiar with. He seems very level-headed and consistently freedom-oriented. He’s also got a relatively soothing speaking voice–I fear ever seeing him lose his shit, presuming it happens.

            The (((animus))), presuming you’re reading it right (why wouldn’t you be?) is a downer. I would cut her slack if it’s a matter of it only being about the Left-side in the Jewish culture, but, she should be careful to point out that it’s about political behavior, and not ethnicity.

          6. l0b0t

            Matt’s voice is creamy dreamy and was what initially drew me in. I dig Tim Pool as well but his voice gets annoying after a few minutes. Radio voice is something that must be cultivated and practiced.

          7. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

            I’ve only heard him on a few videos. I thought I was pretty sensitive to voice, but, I never noticed anything about his.

            Now, I’m gonna be listening for it when I see him.

            cultivated and practiced

            Yeah….::sigh:: Dammit

          8. BakedPenguin

            I’ve seen Beauty & the Beta for a while now. I’d generally agree with Sir Digby’s assessment. Matt is a calm guy, and fairly libertarian in most respects. (I’d vote for him over Weld in a second).

            The only problem I have with ‘ she should be careful to point out that it’s about political behavior, and not ethnicity.’ is that it buys into the PC narrative that we all have to explain our views to specifically rule out racism as the cause. Is this where we are, current year? Racism is fucked up, but do we have to point it out over and over and over again? At some point, it really seems like apologia to the leftist narrative.

          9. Sir Digby’s Contrabulous Faptraption

            Hmmm…never thought of it that way. I think that if you are pointing to an ethnic group (I say it’s ethnicity and /or culture, as opposed to race) multiple times, it helps to re-assure an audience that the gripe is with a behavior or idea, as opposed to it being an inherent quality.

            I don’t think it ought to be done over and over. No, that IS FDS territory (Fuck Dat Shit). So, no, I don’t mean to suggest that every complaint she makes be tagged with a disclaimer, per se. Just that, if she hasn’t made it clear (it seems to be on some radars), she should clarify.

            If she just doesn’t like Jews, she should also be clear about that, too.

          10. BakedPenguin

            Sir Digby, can you point out some relevant examples? I’m willing to listen to evidence.

          11. BakedPenguin

            I should’ve included l0b0t in this narrative. L0b0t,if you could provide some examples, it’d be real helpful.

  63. l0b0t

    Unsolicited opinion – The Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers stands as one of the 5 best comic titles in the world.

    1. BakedPenguin

      Good series. Way back when I smoked weed, fun to read, too.

      1. blackjack

        +1 Here’s your pound of weed, sorry, no baggies!

        1. l0b0t

          “Fat Freddy, take our last $40 and score a lid. And don’t get burned this time!”

          1. BakedPenguin

            “Score a lid” ha ha ha.I’ll take phrases that haven’t been used in the last decade, Alex.

            That said, Ive said that in my lifetime…uh… but not in any time soon. Statute of limitations long since passed.

            Just in case anyone out there was wondering.

          2. blackjack

            I have scored a 5 finger lid of Colombian gold before and I had a few trips on Mr. Natural acid. Obviously, the statute of limitations has run out.

          3. BakedPenguin

            Dude, dude, respect.

  64. Sean

    Is that a chainsaw in your pants or are you just happy to see me?

    https://abc30.com/video-man-walks-out-of-store-with-chainsaw-hidden-beneath-his-clothes/5233179/

    1. It takes more than petty larceny to Rev my engine.