Wednesday Afternoon Pre-School Graduation Links

My son is graduating from pre-school tonight, and if Joe Biden is there, I will do my level best to keep him away from any of the little girls.

Joe Biden tells a 10 year old girl that she’s good looking and asks for her address. I imagine his handler is probably on the seven day waitlist for a handgun right now so he can eat a bullet rather than do another year of that job.

I see we’ve lost a Hat & Hair reader. I thought today’s version was rather mild. Tasteful. The Best Hat & Hair.

In Texas, it is now legal to carry a club and brass knuckles. Just remember, it is also legal to carry guns.

 

Of course every time I read “brass knuckles”, I actually hear this.

Comments

281 responses to “Wednesday Afternoon Pre-School Graduation Links”

  1. Count Potato

    “Joe Biden tells a 10 year old girl that she’s good looking and asks for her address.”

    OMWC 2024?

    1. Private Chipperbot

      She’ll be way too old by then.

    2. Count Potato

      “”16-44… It’s a big gap.” But this didn’t stop Andy and Beth from giving #AgeGapLove a go.”

      https://twitter.com/channel5_tv/status/1132618639352377344

      1. The Other Kevin

        I don’t think you want anyone to find a search for #AgeGapLove in your browsing history.

      2. Gadfly

        That’s pretty creepy, especially with the family friend angle, but I hate the dumbing-down of language in the comments of people accusing the dude of being a pedo. 16 ain’t a child.

        1. 16 is legal in many jurisdictions.

          1. Rasilio

            Less than 20 years ago it was legal in most jurisdictions. Might still be most from a global perspective

          2. Gadfly

            Including the one where those folks are, the UK.

    3. ChipsnSalsa

      Is someone in the campaign going to install a shock collar on his shirts?

    4. bacon-magic

      Try for find that story via Google…maybe 2 sites. That’s it.

  2. Private Chipperbot

    Funky Monkey.

  3. Count Potato

    “Just remember, it is also legal to carry guns.”

    Is it also legal to beat webmasters who use adblock detectors?

    1. Cacciatore

      A man can dream, a man can dream…

  4. Rebel Scum

    I can’t get over how Mueller’s statement is a literal reversal of the “innocent until proven guilty” legal standard that we are supposed to have.

    1. leon

      Well last least that’s how it’s being spun. In some sense it makes sense, if you were never going to indict a president then how can we know if you think he should be prosecuted. But that’s not what happened either. He refused to say that he thinks Trump committed a crime.

    2. R C Dean

      Promoting my comment from the deadthread:

      Alright, I’m burning my lunch hour looking at the Mueller report, specifically at the sections that address the constitutionality of charging a President with obstruction.

      The conclusion, reached right there in the fucking report, is that there is no overarching barrier to charging a President with obstruction. Even his exercise of Constitutional powers can be obstruction, if done for corrupt motives. I see, on a quick review, no reference to the DOJ memo that he spoke of today, that supposedly says you can’t charge a sitting President. His report says you can. He specifically rejects the argument that the President has blanket immunity, and spends pages laying out when and how the President can be charged with obstruction.

      His conclusion is breathtakingly arrogant: “Because we determined not to make a traditional prosecutorial judgment . . . . this report does not exonerate the President.” In order to say he as a prosecutor is not exonerating the President, he first had to jettison the role of a prosecutor (which is not to exonerate anyone) and take on the role of grand inquisitor.

      As near as I can tell, his press conference today flatly contradicts what he said in the report. No wonder he didn’t take any questions. What a steaming pile of shit this man is.

      I would only add that his report comprehensively violates DOJ guidelines and the code of professional ethics. Prosecutors are simply not allowed to air dirty laundry that they discover about anyone, outside the process of seeking a conviction. He should be disbarred for this.

      1. R C Dean

        One more thing:

        Immediately on taking office, Trump should have fired Comey for his press conference saying no reasonable prosecutor would charge Hillary. At the time, I was only upset with the part where she wasn’t going to be charged. In retrospect, I should have also been upset that he, too, aired the dirty laundry of someone who they weren’t going to charge.

      2. But he’s going up against Orange Man Bad, so it’s all good.

      3. “He should be disbarred for this.”

        I’d be more satisfied if he got his cushy pension and retirement stripped.

      4. Tonio

        Cui custodet ipses custodiens, RC? Cui?

    3. Drake

      I can. He’s a Clinton hack amd came up through the corrupt Boston FBI office. He went to court there to keep guys in jail he absolutely knew were innocent.

      1. Fatty Bolger

        Yep. Howie Carr has written about this, for anybody who is interested.

  5. Count Potato

    “It’s one thing to buy a $10 devotional candle, imagine being this guy”

    https://twitter.com/iowahawkblog/status/1133797042269106178

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      JFC

      1. Sensei

        https://www.wired.com/2009/09/zune-tattoo/

        Bonus points for the Dick Cheney tattoo.

  6. The Late P Brooks

    I can’t get over how Mueller’s statement is a literal reversal of the “innocent until proven guilty” legal standard that we are supposed to have.

    “Sentence first, verdict afterward.”

    1. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

      “Take the guns first. Due process later.”

      – Trump

      1. Florida Man

        Burn

      2. “Tulsi Gabbard Apologist”

        This whole Russia fiasco is a farce and I have no respect for those who went from “muh..collusion” to “muh..obstruction of justice”, such as the less than esteemed congressman from Michigan. But, I have far less sympathy for Trump than I did for Kavanaugh when they tried to ignore the whole “innocent until proven guilty” standard.

        1. To me, as with all the bread and circuses surrounding Trump, it’s the larger implications that concern me. Trump has done some good and some bad, he doesn’t fit neatly into any political box because he lacks principles. He’s actually a pretty milquetoast President (aside from the tweeting).

          That’s all beside the point though. Washington’s always been corrupt, but this is the most blatant and audacious about it they’ve been, at least in my lifetime. I don’t like the precedent being set; not one bit. Same with Herself and Comey’s farce of a press conference.

          1. R C Dean

            He’s actually a pretty milquetoast President

            He’s basically Bill Clinton’s third term, in many ways.

          2. Rebel Scum

            So you’re saying they should turn the cushions when he leaves office.

          3. Gustave Lytton

            Judging from SF’s chronicles, they should go British on the place after he leaves.

          4. Winston

            He’s actually a pretty milquetoast President

            His major crimes in DC are that he is too vulgar and said “Can’t We Get Along with Russia?” Not that he actually intended to get along with Russia but he raised the possibility…

            I don’t like the precedent being set; not one bit.

            Make bullshit allegations and if you are unable to prove them then cry obstruction. What’s not to worry about? And plenty of “libertarians” will go along cuz cocktail parties and principles…

          5. Galt1138

            “To me, as with all the bread and circuses surrounding Trump, it’s the larger implications that concern me.”

            This is exactly right. What it appears the upper echelons of the FBI, DOJ, CIA, and members of the previous administration did is inexcusable. It’s a tremendous abuse of power.

            It’s especially because Trump is a sleaze that the standard of innocent until proven guilty must be upheld.

            Instead, Mueller couldn’t find evidence of an actual crime, but must control the narrative for the leftist mob.

            I’m fucking pissed not only for the blatant power grab, but for having to defend a boor like Trump.

  7. The Other Kevin

    I’m giving all you “narrow gaze” recipients the afternoon off.
    This should keep Swiss busy for a while.

  8. Florida Man

    I have to say Gilbert Godfrey as Hitler is one of the funniest things I’ve seen in a long time.

    https://www.rt.com/news/460557-netflix-anne-frank-hitler/

    1. Don Escaped Texas

      too soon?

      Jeffrey Ross Lifschultz: “it’s safe to come out now, Anne”

    2. That’s Not Funny™

  9. Count Potato

    “Man fined $30,000 for smuggling almost 4,000 kg of cheese into Canada”

    https://nationalpost.com/news/canada/man-fined-30000-for-smuggling-almost-4000-kg-of-cheese-into-canada

    https://twitter.com/nationalpost/status/1133142125921624064

    Sure, you’re saying it’s just cheese, and all the other kids are doing it. But it leads to harder stuff.

    1. PBRstreetgang

      Glad they caught this dude, sounds like he’s a real Muenster

      1. Private Chipperbot

        Just wait til swiss cuts in on this.

      2. I understand he’s also a big supporter of the Kurds.

        1. Enough About Palin

          No whey.

      3. Spudalicious

        He really went out on a Limburger.

    2. Tonio

      When there’s a will, there’s a whey.

      1. Scruffy Nerfherder

        booooo booooo booooooooooooo

      2. Enough About Palin

        Oops.

    3. JaimeRoberto: Gentleman, Scholar, French Tickler

      His alibi had a lot of holes in it, like his cheese.

      1. Certified Public Asshat

        Not the sharpest cheddar.

        1. It doesn’t say if the driver is American.

    4. The Other Kevin

      That’s not gouda.

    5. leon

      Cut it out with the cheesy puns.

    6. Red Pill Matt

      It’s edam shame he was caught.

    7. That’s one big queso smuggling the cops got.

    8. R C Dean

      Man fined $30,000

      That’s a lot of cheddar.

    9. JaimeRoberto: Gentleman, Scholar, French Tickler

      The politicians will want to make a big deal out of this, but really it’s a non-parmesan issue.

      1. PBRstreetgang

        This one is grate!

    10. Grumbletarian

      The man’s audacity is what gets me. How dairy!

    11. Gustave Lytton

      They’ll do anything to protect the CanCon of Kraft Dinner.

    12. Trolleric the Goth

      ohhh, he won’t brie doing that again!

    13. Rasilio

      I hear officer Alfredo really grilled the guy to get him to talk

  10. I. B. McGinty

    “I see we’ve lost a Hat & Hair reader”

    *Thinks “oh no!” and clicks link*

    “Man sets himself on fire near White House”

    Am I a bad person for laughing?

    1. leon

      No. Your a bad person regardless

      1. jesse.in.mb

        look at the company he keeps

    2. No one should give you any heat over a spontaneous reaction.

    3. Stinky Wizzleteats

      As long as you were shaking your head while you were doing it you’re fine.

    4. Gustave Lytton

      It’s too bad he didn’t wait until the second half of the double feature that’s promised tonight.

    5. bacon-magic

      This gets me fired up.

      1. Not Adahn

        yeah, nothing’s worse than burnt bacon.

  11. Rebel Scum

    Joe Biden tells a 10 year old girl that she’s good looking and asks for her address.

    That’s even too young for Roy Moore.

  12. The Late P Brooks

    “Take the guns first. Due process later.”

    – Trump

    ?

    1. Rebel Scum

      One of Trump’s off the cuff and very poor statements that made DiFi wet but never came to fruition as actual policy.

      1. Don Escaped Texas

        off the cuff and very poor autocratic statements

        that’ll happen with unprincipled hacks from time to time

        1. Winston

          We need to find some principled non-hacks to take offic…HAHAHAHAHAHA!

          1. R C Dean

            Even Amash has hopped on the unprincipled hack bandwagon. Sad!

          2. bacon-magic

            His campaign announcement will be within 2 weeks.

    2. Winston

      Also bumpstocks

  13. Count Potato

    “ORANGE MAN BAD”

    https://twitter.com/shoe0nhead/status/1133794388260413441

    “Why THE DEMS will lose AGAIN (livestream clip)”

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N_vkiTjAGQM

    1. As much as I like her, I think she’s wrong; Bernie would get Mondale’d by Trump. Biden is the only one, IMO, who has a legitimate shot at beating Trump since he can peel the voters that put Trump in office in the first place. She inhabits a particular bubble of young pseudo-Dems, but that bubble is not what will determine the election.

      She is right though as far as Tulsi goes, she’s the only one in the Dem field approaching sanity.

      My 0.02 and I could easily be wrong.

      1. R C Dean

        The Dems real challenge, regardless of the candidate, is how they bridge the gap between the highly intolerant hard left and the mushy middle. They are going to have to, because they need both to win. I’m not sure its possible.

        In previous cycles, the hard left would fall in line and vote for the Dem, no matter how “moderate”. I’m not sure that’s going to happen this time.

        1. PBRstreetgang

          Especially if that mushy middle candidate means nominating a old white male. The hard left is going to cost them the ’20 election

          1. Tonio

            ^This

        2. Donation Not Taxation

          Will it matter who the D nominee is with and fear of D-pres judges and if terror attacks in other countries but not US, high labor force participation, booming 401(k)/403(b)/etc., military aggression overseas with US casualties so low they are swept under the Oval Office rug, his base accepting that Congress is the problem to still having ObamaCare but no Wall?

          1. Galt1138

            Well, the yield curve inverted a while back, which traditionally in an indicator of a recession coming in the next 18 months. That could ruin Trump’s re-election.

        3. Gustave Lytton

          Smear their opponents hard enough that the mushy middle supports the D candidate regardless of position. See blue states.

          1. Nancy Pelosi, in a rare moment of total candor, admitted that a “glass of water with a letter D on its side” would be elected in her San Francisco district.

        4. Rasilio

          So what do you think, as Biden sews up the nomination one of the women candidates bolts the party and runs for the Greens or as an independent in the General?

          I could easily see Warren doing that, not so sure about Kamala.

          1. Bring back the reanimated corpse of Ralph Nader!

          2. The Last American Hero

            If Biden gets the nod, Kamala gets on her knees for him to get the VEEP spot.

      2. Rasilio

        I think it is fairly likely Bernie would have beaten Trump back in ’16 but I think he’d have no shot now. Trump has solidified his base too much and a large portion of that is drawn directly from people who otherwise would have been securely in Bernie’s camp

        1. creech

          What states did Trump win that Bernie could have won instead? And vice versa too.

          1. Gadfly

            Michigan and Wisconsin. Possibly Florida or Pennsylvania as well.

          2. Rasilio

            Wisconsin (Trump +0.7) at a minimum.

            Bernies appeal to blue collar whites and especially organized labor would have made Wisconsin solidly blue in ’16. Same with Michigan (Trump +0.2) and Pennsylvannia (Trump + 0.7)

            Other states that might have flipped and the margin Trump won them by …
            Florida – 1.2
            Arizona – 3.5
            North Carolina – 3.7

            So that is 3 large heavily unionized states that Trump won by a margin of under 1%. Bernie would have carried them all. The other 3 Bernie would have been less likely to steal but at a minimum he would have cut into Trumps margins there.

            Now what states would Bernie have lost the Hillary won?

            Colorado – (Clinton + 4.9) – My guess is it flips but it will be by the slimmest of margins if it does so
            Maine (Clinton + 3) – I doubt it, still likely stays blue
            Minnesotta (Clinton + 1.5) – still doubt it, one of the most progressive states in the country
            Nevada (Clinton + 2.4) – This one might have flipped, my guess is it would have
            New Hampshire (Clinton + 0.4) – hard to say here, Hew Hampshire is nowhere near as progressive as Bernie but it is also right next door to Vermont.
            Virginia (Clinton + 5.3) – the spread is pretty far apart for it to have flipped however with all the military it easily could have done so

            So that has
            Bernie gaining Wisconson, Pennsylvannia, and Michigan at a minimum with a good shot at Florida to boot
            Trump gaining Virginia, Colorado, and Nevada

            That makes Florida the swing. If Trump carries it he wins 289 – 249, if Bernie flipped Florida it goes to Bernie 278 – 260

            This also assumes Trump was able to carry Virginia over Bernie which he might have but it would have been extremely close

            Point being had it been Bernie vs Trump in 2016 the race would have been a complete toss up because Bernie would have carried the rust belt states that Trump took with ease.

          3. R C Dean

            Bernie would have carried the rust belt states that Trump took with ease

            I just really have a hard time believing that. Rust belters aren’t leftist socialists; even if they are vote-for-the-Dem unionistas, Bernie isn’t a Dem, and I don’t see him having the kind of instinct for the blue collar voters that Trump has. Did Bernie have any real blue collar support in the primaries, or was it college kids?

          4. Rasilio

            Bernie may no be a Dem but he is about as big a supporter of Unions as exists in this country. Combine that with his anti free trade agreement stances, his mildly anti immigrant views, and his not being hardline on guns and he would have captured the bulk of the rust belt with ease

          5. R C Dean

            I think you underestimate how many votes Hillary got simply because she would have been the first woman President. Bernie would have gotten none of those.

            I think the unions were pretty much all in for Hillary anyway, so I don’t see Bernie getting many more union votes than she got.

            If you have two candidates going for the America-First vote (anti-trade agreement, anti-immigration), I don’t think the socialist wins.

            But, as Rhywun points out, we’ll never know.

          6. R C Dean

            Without gaming it in more detail, my initial reaction is that Bernie Sanders, Socialist and Not-a-Democrat-Party member, has never, and will never, have a chance of winning the Presidency. Sure, he has an enthusiastic following that may be a little too large to be a fringe group, but that’s a very long way from having a national electoral college majority.

          7. Rasilio

            Remember, anyone nominated by the Democratic party has a shot at a national electoral college majority. The discussion here is not whether Bernie could win on his own, the question is whether he would have beaten Trump had he been nominated by the Democrats in 2016.

            So replace Hillary with Bernie and what would the outcome have been? yes we know that replacing Hillary with Bernie is something that never could have happened in the real world so we know Bernie will never be President but in the proposed hypothetical I think it is a given that he would have outperformed Hillary in the Electoral College and he had very good odds of actually winning over Trump

          8. R C Dean

            So replace Hillary with Bernie and what would the outcome have been?

            I still think Trump wins. Bernie would have run harder in the rust belt, but I just have a hard time seeing him pulling blue collar voters, who are not leftists or socialists, away from Trump, who knows how to connect with them.

            For every voter who Bernie might have gotten that Hillary didn’t, I think Trump would have gotten two or three who just couldn’t quite swallow voting for an avowed socialist. Even with their new crop of socialists getting all kinds of laudatory press, the Dems are seeing that going hard left is a losing strategy in a Presidential election.

          9. Rhywun

            Yeah, I’m not buying it either. Of course, we’ll never know about 2016.

            What I’m scratching my head over is why Biden didn’t run in 2016.

          10. What I’m scratching my head over is why Biden didn’t run in 2016.

            Because it was HER TURN!!
            A good lifelong Dem soldier like him would have to know better than to interfere with that.

          11. Rhywun

            Stupid move on his part. Well, except maybe it saved his life.

    2. She says “verse” instead of “versus”

      RAGE BUILDING.

  14. Gadfly

    My son is graduating from pre-school tonight, and if Joe Biden is there, I will do my level best to keep him away from any of the little girls.

    Joe Biden and a priest walk into a pre-school graduation…

    1. Florida Man

      And the priest says “Dial it back Joe”

  15. Sensei

    It only took until the third to last paragraph…

    Land use, zoning and housing policies, in addition to discrimination, have stratified the region by race and class, said Menendian, the lead author.

    The Bay Area of 1970 was less racially segregated than it was in 2010

    1. Rhywun

      All that’s telling me is that SF has become way more expensive to live in. “Integration” doesn’t magically solve anything despite what I’ve been hearing all my life.

      BTW, I’d be curious to hear some examples of this “discrimination” that is supposedly taking place.

      1. PBRstreetgang

        Price discrimination.

        1. R C Dean

          More specifically, bribe discrimination. A very heavily regulated housing market is a petri dish for corruption. I would be willing to bet that, if you can’t make significant payments under the table, there’s a lot of housing in San Fran that is offlimits to you.

          1. PBRstreetgang

            I have no doubt this is the case.

          2. Tonio

            A very heavily regulated housing market is a petri dish for corruption.

            FTFY

        2. Rhywun

          Yeah, I don’t think that the kind of discrimination they’re implying.

      2. Sensei

        Yeah, I was drawn to the zoning and housing issues and glossed by the second part with the “citation needed”.

      3. JaimeRoberto: Gentleman, Scholar, French Tickler

        Probably things like telling a prospective renter that the apartment has been taken. Many years ago when I was looking for an apartment in SF the landlady knocked the price down for me without prompting. Now maybe she thought I was eye candy, or more likely she probably thought that I looked like the profile of a reliable renter. I doubt the discount would have been offered to just anyone.

        1. “Now maybe she thought I was eye candy”

          Does this imply that you were paying the rent in “other ways”?

          1. He doesn’t like to speak about having to plow the manorial fields.

          2. JaimeRoberto: Gentleman, Scholar, French Tickler

            Thankfully no. She was old enough to be my grandmother.

          3. pistoffnick

            Blue-haired ladies need lovin’ too.

  16. Rebel Scum

    I see we’ve lost a Hat & Hair reader.

    We have fun roasting each other. But some people can’t take the heat.

    1. Chipwooder

      That guy was really fired up by the latest H&H.

      1. Spudalicious

        It really sparked him into action.

  17. The Late P Brooks

    The Dems real challenge, regardless of the candidate, is how they bridge the gap between the highly intolerant hard left and the mushy middle.

    “Mushy middle” as in “people who live in the real world”.

    I could be wrong (I usually am), but I think the Dems are going to have an extremely difficult time reassembling the fragmentation grenade which they have made of their party.

    1. Rhywun

      Nah. They’ll get in line. They always do.

    2. R C Dean

      I think its inevitable that the current tribalist/identity group approach by the Dems blows up in their face. The only thing that can unite the tribes under their zero-sum, who-is-at-the-top-of-the-stack approach is a common enemy. Trump has so far filled that role, but as the tribes compete with each other to be the top dog, the infighting is going to be ferocious and I suspect that, when surrounded by near enemies, the common enemy is going to seem less important.

      1. Pine_Tree

        I think they’re betting on the unifying effect of “we’ll give you (and you and you and you and you) all free stuff”.

        1. “YOU get a car! And YOU get a car! And YOU get a car…!”

        2. R C Dean

          A prove strategy. And it may be enough to paper over the intersectional struggle for party dominance. But its gonna be tough to get the wokesters behind an old white man when there were so many indentity group candidates, and it will be all too easy for a narrative to take hold that, just like it conspired against Bernie last time, the Party conspired against the wimmens, teh gaiz, and the coloreds.

  18. Winston

    but having lived through the coup d’etat that deposed Thaksin Shinawatra in 2006, the parallels are striking and ominous.

    When HM first mentioned this event to me a while back I noticed the parallels immediately.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2005–2006_Thai_political_crisis

    Not sure how accurate this is. And the English is not the greatest.

    1. Gustave Lytton

      Nothing on the page, so complete unsupported speculation, I wager some of the opposition is due to his Chinese ethnicity, the Jews of SE Asia.

      1. Heroic Mulatto

        No, the Bangkokian upper middle class is primarily Chinese-Thai and were his strongest opponents.

        What they didn’t like was that their taxes were going to support populist giveaways to the rural Issan Thai of the northeast, whom the urban Chinese-Thai loathe.

        1. Gustave Lytton

          Ahh, my baseless speculation stands corrected.

          Also, had delicious Thai for lunch today. I fully support anyone that can cook moving here to avoid instability back home.

          1. Now you’ve got me jonesing for Pad Thai.

          2. Spudalicious

            That’s a weird thing here. Boise used to have tremendous Chinese restaurants, but now there’s only one good one. Thai? Vietnamese? Nepalese dumpling house? Check, and all superb.

    1. Rhywun

      It runs in the family.

    2. leon

      Isn’t America great?

    3. Suthenboy

      What kind of crazy shit is that?

    4. Oh that R-A-T-I-O is something to behold. Right off the bat, too.

  19. Count Potato

    “New this issue: A Chad is a guy that angry, celibate men online want to look like. Some will tear apart their face to try”

    https://twitter.com/NYMag/status/1133325076869337090

    “How Many Bones Would You Break to Get Laid? “Incels” are going under the knife to reshape their faces, and their dating prospects.”

    https://www.thecut.com/2019/05/incel-plastic-surgery.html

    1. As someone said earlier: “Cool. Now do a story on boob jobs.”

      1. Rhywun

        As I said earlier, the “before” shots there are more attractive than the “after”. IMHO “dopey model” is not something to aspire to.

    2. Gadfly

      “How Many Bones Would You Break to Get Laid? “Incels” are going under the knife to reshape their faces, and their dating prospects.”

      I’m thinking it has more to do with self-perception than a desire to get laid. Unless you look like the elephant man, if your only goal is to get laid you can do that quite easily by some combination of lowering your standards or opening your wallet. And even if you look like that, with the internet you could probably find the someone out there who is into it.

      1. Rhywun

        Yeah, those guys definitely have mental issues. It’s touched on in the article, with Dr. Nick just shrugging it off and collecting checks.

    3. PBRstreetgang

      “How Many Bones Would You Break to Get Laid?”
      Depends whose bones I’m breaking.

    4. BTW: I get tired of wokesters trashing the concept of hypergamy. Hypergamy definitely is real, the incels are just wrong in that they think it only affects women. Dating and sex is a market, and everyone in a market is trying to get the best ROI they can. The difference is that men and women value different attributes, but both sexes are going to try and get the best they possibly can for what they offer. It’s perfectly logical. Why would a woman mate with/marry an unemployed, obese, impoverished loser if she has the ability to attract someone better? Similarly, why would a man mate with/marry a 45 year old rapidly approaching menopause if he has the ability to attract a 24 year old hottie?

      1. Rasilio

        Similarly, why would a man mate with/marry a 45 year old rapidly approaching menopause if he has the ability to attract a 24 year old hottie?

        I can actually think of a few possible reasons

        Also while the general point that mating is a market is valid one of the problems of pretty much everyone who uses the term hypergamy non ironically whether they be incel, PUA, or MRA akways overlooks is the fact that there is no objective universal hierarchy of desirability in traits.

        There are combinations of traits that approach universality within a given culture but even those rarely go beyond the mid 80% range.

        So why would a woman date an unemployed obese impoverished loser? No clue go ask all the women who do.

        The reality is that the differences in mating preferences within a gender is as large if not larger than the differences between the genders

    5. Heroic Mulatto

      At least plastic surgery might actually work, as opposed to “Mewing”.

  20. Sensei

    As a student of WW2 – I was unaware of this entire event.

    Australian nurse was ordered to keep war crimes secret

    I also feel like Japan’s WW2 atrocities get much less attention in the west than Germany.

    1. Gustave Lytton

      Or Switzerland’s atrocious POW camps.

      1. Raven Nation

        Well, hell, you learn something every day.

      2. LJW

        Don’t forget the Ustaše Militia

        1. Winston

          Well the Serbs and the Yugonostalgics certainly remember….

    2. Tonio

      It’s been kind of known. Also, totally unsurprising considering the sum of atrocities committed by Imperial Japanese Forces against civilians in occupied territory, POWs, etc.

      But they make such nice cameras.

    3. Winston

      Cold War politics and white guilt for internment and the pretty racist atrocity propaganda against Japan during WWII.

    4. Rufus the Monocled

      So Trump is literally worse than Imperial Japan now?

      Reeee!

      1. Sensei

        Well he was just in Japan!

        1. Spudalicious

          And the first foreign leader to meet the new Emperor. Prolly giving him his marching orders.

          1. R C Dean

            I read somewhere that while he was playing God-Emperor of Japan, MacArthur took the Imperial samurai sword, supposedly made by a deity and given to the royal family back in the day, and that nobody has seen it since.

            Seems like the kind of dick move he would pull. Any truth to it?

          2. Spudalicious

            No idea, but when you read about the passive/aggressive way in which he dealt with Hirohito, I can accept that it may be true.

          3. Spudalicious

            I can’t find any hint of that story.

          4. Scruffy Nerfherder

            I believe he’d do that. I know he took General Yamashita’s 300 year old sword and gave it to West Point.

          5. Scruffy Nerfherder

            That said, I have to give MacArthur credit. He managed to culturally overhaul a country that still believed the emperor was a god.

          6. Scruffy Nerfherder

            Compare MacArthur’s success in postwar Japan to that of any American effort in a foreign country since. He was smart enough to consider the culture and not just his homeland’s domestic politics.

          7. Spudalicious

            Yamashita surrendered the sword, per Japanese custom. He’s just lucky MacArthur didn’t use it to cut his head off and let him finish his life in disgrace, instead.

          8. Scruffy Nerfherder

            Pretty sure they hung Yamashita for war crimes.

          9. Spudalicious

            Ha! I was stoned in that history class. Letting him live would have been worse in his eyes.

          10. Rufus the Monocled

            My buddy’s uncle was head of the RCMP in the 80s/90s and gave his brother (my friend’s father) a special RCMP rifle (I forget the specifics) that was mounted on the wall.

            One day in 1989 (our graduating year) our snoopy, maleducat’ (miseducated) Sicilian friend roamed the hour touching everything until he happened up the rifle resting peacefully on a wall above a sofa/couch/Chesterfield – whatever. He proceeded to grab it to examine it.

            As our buddy was telling him not to crank it….he cranked it.

            My buddy then buried his face in his palms. ‘It was never cranked’.

            Lol.

            ‘Pat, you really need to stop touching things’ I told him.

            Enjoying this Don de Dieu from Unibroue. 9% alcohol and I feel it!

            Reeee!

          11. Rufus the Monocled

            ‘roamed the house’.

          12. Isn’t “Unibroue” the French word for a single eyebrow stretching across the forehead?

          13. Not Adahn

            If it is, the Japanese government hasn’t admitted it.

          14. R C Dean

            A little fishing around on the intertoobz turns up no trace of this story. I wonder where I got it?

          15. Raven Nation

            John Dowd wrote one of the greatest lines in a history book ever: “MacArthur, in whose mind the role of supreme commander and supreme deity was often confused…”

          16. Spudalicious

            From what I just read, he preferred, “Commander in Chief” over “Supreme Commander”. No ego there.

    5. Raven Nation

      Yeah, hard to know for sure why that’s the case. Australians tended to be more aware when I was younger – not sure about today. My grandmother hated the Japanese collectively until the day she died.

      I wonder if sometimes there was an ethnic/racial reason for the different attitude toward Germans & Japanese, i.e. we expected the Germans to behave as civilized white people but not the Japanese. I don’t know though, seems simple.

      Of course, part of the reason the Japanese escaped retribution was because the syndicate wanted Unit 731 to continue its research…

      1. Winston

        Well there was also the fact that the atrocity propaganda against Germany in WWI was discredited so during WWII there was a deliberate attempt to downplay it..

      2. Sensei

        I confess I was unaware about Unit 731 until about a decade ago.

        One of my Japanese friend’s knows a nurse who worked at the camp and continues to press for Japan to fully come clean about it and has written about it.

    6. Scruffy Nerfherder

      Japan was uniformly barbaric towards all other ethnic groups during the war. Ask the Chinese or the Koreans or the Filipinos or…..

      They achieved a level of sadism that is probably unparalleled in the modern era. A sergeant even cannibalized a Chinese woman to feed their troops, after raping her of course.

      America’s need for Japan to be a bulkhead against China and the Soviet Union has let a lot of those atrocities fade from cultural memory.

      1. dontreadonme

        I think you are spot on. We needed to tame and turn the Japanese fury against the Chinese and Russians. That is the only reason they atrocities were underplayed. They acted horribly which should be a lesson to us all. How did this happen? How might it happen again? How might it be prevented? Going to Japan in a few months. I hope to explore this issue a bit. My guess is that the current population is just as aware as our millennials are aware of eggs not being considered dairy

      2. The Last American Hero

        Airstrip 2

    7. BakedPenguin

      A big reason was that the Soviet Union became an enemy almost the day after the war ended. The US wanted Japanese cooperation as an anti-Soviet power.

      1. Raven Nation

        True. But you could say a pretty similar thing about the Germans.

        1. BakedPenguin

          True. Also, we needed rocket scientists.

          1. Raven Nation

            +1 Operation Paper Clip

    8. There’s an X-Files 2-parter entitled “Nisei” and “731” that dealt with this subject (and its more modern version)

  21. Count Potato

    “This service allows white women to hire women of color to come to dinner so the white women can “bear witness to our pain, the pain you [the women who invited the WoC to dinner] have caused.” “Race2Dinner” nicely sums up contemporary upscale progressivism.”

    https://twitter.com/jessesingal/status/1133447841249148929

    1. Count Potato

      “Our mission is simple – reveal the naked truth about RACISM in America and YOUR COMPLICITY as white women. This isn’t the stuff of Trump, the KKK and Nazis. That’s easy, it’s obvious and denouncing it requires almost nothing of white folks. What’s hard? Looking at yourself in the mirror and acknowledging that, as a white person in America, you are an active participant in upholding white supremacy. This isn’t personal. This doesn’t make you bad. This is systemic. And this makes you human who is part of that system. As Black and Brown women, we too are humans who are part of the system. Only we are on the other side: we are on the receiving end of white supremacy while you are on the giving end. Until and unless white folks are willing to bear witness to the pain they’ve caused, we will never see change. The system of oppression will remain safely in place until white people – ALL WHITE PEOPLE – are willing to acknowledge their complicity.

      That is where the Race 2 Dinners come in.

      white women: We are talking about YOU. We are talking about your complicity in upholding white supremacy and keeping us Brown and Black women down. You like to think that is the stuff of Fox News but it is more than that. It is a multifaceted, complete system that functions in all areas: economic, political, educational, health, religion, war, media advertising, entertainment, labor, law and every other system, which all work to keep all things in place that support white supremacy. Our goal is to dig out the tumor called white privilege, power, control and reveal it for what it is, as an even more sinister and toxic form of RACISM. You are an integral part of this system. It is time for you to own that.

      Making white women comfortable isn’t our goal.

      Our goal is to be seen, to be heard, and to have you, white women, bear witness to our pain, pain that you have caused.”

      1. I see racism here, but it’s not coming from the source these bigots are attributing.

      2. Tonio

        Wow, it took her ten whole words to get to all-caps ranting.

        1. She wants you to know she’s REALLY SERIOUS about RACISM.

      3. Gadfly

        you are an active participant in upholding white supremacy…This doesn’t make you bad

        How the heck do they reconcile those two thoughts? I mean, the whole thing is a bit ridiculous, but the fact that they say these two things mere sentences apart in a supposedly anti-racist screed makes me question either their sincerity or their intelligence.

    2. Count Potato

      “HOW YOU CAN HOST A DINNER?

      STEP 1 – Are really ready to join us?

      Please consider WHY you want to join a dinner with Regina and Saira. If it’s “to learn” or to feel better or to be a “good ally,” reconsider. This dinner is not for you or about you. The dinner will be painful, uncomfortable, maddening, and upsetting. But what you’ll experience listening to our stories doesn’t come close to the pain of living as a Brown or Black woman in America. Are you TRULY ready to join us?”

      https://race2dinner.com/

      Also, fried chicken.

      1. What about watermelon?

      2. Chipwooder

        Grape soda optional.

        This is quite an impressive grift they have going on.

        1. Scruffy Nerfherder

          I wonder if they believe their own bullshit. God I hope not. I hope it’s just an extravagant grift.

        2. Homple

          Purple drank?

      3. Spudalicious

        This is going to be big in the sado/masochism crowd.

      4. B.P.

        Ah, Saira Rao. This lunatic ran for congress.

        1. Count Potato

          “In the wake of countless fake white supremacist accounts mimicking and trolling me, I am delighted to have been Twitter verified!”

          https://twitter.com/sairasameerarao/status/1133839978201460736

      5. Plinker762

        Where’s all the white women at?

        1. Spudalicious

          Eating Schnitzengruben.

    3. Nothing makes dinner better than a good struggle session!

    4. Rhywun

      That was a good episode of Seinfeld.

    5. Rufus the Monocled

      Did you see the first couple of comments including the dog bathing? LOL.

  22. LJW

    NYC May Face Lawsuit Over Schools Chancellor Carranza’s Reorganization Of Department Of Education

    Someone posted this story a few days back. But I just wanted to point out the insanity of the bureaucratic adminstration in these schools. They have a department and administrator for everything. Where the hell are the teachers unions?

    1. Winston

      Isn’t that the same guy who thinks Asians benefited from “White Privilege” and that “objectivity”, “individualism” and “perfectionism” are “white supremacy”?

      1. LJW

        I believe so.

      2. Rhywun

        Yes. His employees are now being fed through “toxic whiteness” struggle sessions. And Asians are waking up to his plans to water down the smart-kid schools which will dramatically disfavor them.

    2. Rhywun

      Among other things, he created a new layer of nine executive superintendents with a $2.5 million price tag.

      Yeah, that’s a new detail to me. It’s good to be friends with the new dictator, I guess.

  23. l0b0t

    Hey Gustave, was it you complaining about an inability to watch Paul Drake work for that law-talking dude ? If so, please to enjoy the entire series

    1. Winston

      Allen Jenkins was the best Drake…

  24. Gadfly

    A lesson from GOT: don’t name your kid after a fictional character before the story is complete.

    More American girls in the United States now are named “Khaleesi” than are named “Betsy” or “Nadine.” For new Moms, it became a more popular choice than “Gloria,” “Anne,” or “Julie.” You will be meeting them everywhere in the years to come, as they grow old enough to interact and tweet. In classrooms. As contestants on game shows. In police line-ups. All these American girls named “Khaleesi.” Oh, what a beautiful name!

    And then came the last episode-and-a-half of the eight-year drama.

    Oops.

    1. Winston

      Isn’t Khaleesi a title and not a name?

      1. You think someone who’d name their kid after a fictional character is smart enough to tell the difference?

      2. Gadfly

        Yes, but it’s a title that is mostly associated with one person. Kind of like if someone named their kid Fuhrer.

      3. Urthona

        Yes. And it basically means dictator so…

        1. Homple

          Well, leder or controller anyway. A CEO is a Geschäftsführer. A train driver is a Loksführer.

    2. Rhywun

      don’t name your kid after a fictional character before the story is complete

      Seriously, just don’t. What the hell is wrong with people?

      1. Winston

        All the Cedrics, Shirleys and Jennifers have a sad…

        1. leon

          Who was Jennifer?

          1. Winston

            Jennifer is a variant of Guinevere and a character in a Bernard Shaw play

          2. Winston

            And Love Story…

          3. Heroic Mulatto

            Don’t forget “Jessica”. Shakespeare straight up invented that name.

          4. The Bearded Hobbit
      2. R C Dean

        don’t name your kid after a fictional character

        Sound advice. Diziet and Cheradenine Dean still haven’t forgiven me.

      3. Winston

        Or all the Vanessas…

      4. Rasilio

        You mean like Wendy?

        1. Rhywun

          Wendy existed before the character that made it popular.

      5. Think of all those poor bastards named Jesus.

        1. Rhywun

          Heh, I figured someone would go there.

      6. My son is named after Ethan Allen (real) and Ethan Edwards (fictional)

        1. The Last American Hero

          Not foolin’ me, he’s named after Tom Cruise’s MIP role.

    3. Not Adahn

      To be fair, any child born to those kind of parents never had much of a chance anyway.

  25. pistoffnick

    The new electrician is going through the breaker panels and williy-nilly shutting off breakers. During business hours!

    Q: “What does this one do?”

    A. It shuts down power to the test that pistoffnick is running. He’s lucky all my stuff is connected to battery backups. It takes nearly 40 minutes from a dead start to get this test up and running. And if I lose the data, then I have to redo that part of the test.

    They let the last electrician go because he let his license lapse. He was at least competent. I’m not sure about this new guy.

    1. R C Dean

      I just hope he checked the thermostat.

    2. Not Adahn

      Did he show you his Service Interruption Prevention plan?

      1. pistoffnick

        Hah!

    3. Gustave Lytton

      Ahh, the ole shut everything off that you don’t know what it’s for and see if anyone notices plan! Sounds like you hired an experienced pro.

    4. LJW

      Sounds like me when I moved into our home previously owned by a Chinese family. Unfortunately I couldn’t translate the labels.

  26. Wooo. About to go catch the remastered 40th anniversary edition of Alien. Good times.

  27. Not Adahn

    Brass knuckles? How ’bout this instead?

    I don’t care if it’s racist, they’re adorable.

    1. Spudalicious

      This dude is way beyond wine snob. That said, the label stating it’s a Grand Cru bdx is pretty stupid, given that the label says Bourgogne. And any self respecting burgundy would be in a fat bottle, not the skinny bdx bottle.

      1. quincy

        I am too drunk to spell connaisseur.

        1. Spudalicious

          Well, you just outed yourself as some sort of snob for using the French spelling of the word.

          1. quincy

            Cheers!

            *Raises half empty can of Bud.*

    2. Winston

      Must have missed that episode the Neutral Zone.

  28. Raven Nation

    This is pretty hilarious: New Zealand budget leaked to opposition, leads to calls for police investigation.

    Turns out the Treasury Department had uploaded information to a cloned website and forgot to prevent it being public. People ran a search for “budget” on the department’s own website and got information about the budget.

    1. This is the same brain trust that gave a terrorist exactly what he wanted, so I’m not surprised.

    2. LJW

      Their budget isn’t public information?

      1. Raven Nation

        Yeah, but not until it’s presented to Parliament.

        1. LJW

          So after they whitewash the hookers and blow?

    3. Rhywun

      Turns out the Treasury Department had uploaded information to a cloned website

      So the article is fake news? Or was this discovered later?

      1. Raven Nation

        The Treasury Department insisted it had been hacked and the police started an investigation. The opposition claimed nothing illegal had happened. Some time in the last couple of days the cops, or Treasury, figured out what had happened and the investigation was dropped. So, the original story was true for the first day or two. At least, it was technically true which, as we all know…

        1. Scruffy Nerfherder

          In the US they probably would have continued the investigation.

    4. Stinky Wizzleteats

      How do the cops down there find the time, what with them having to shred firearms and investigate people posting videos and all?

  29. Count Potato

    “86-year-old New Hampshire man bit by rabid bat hiding in iPad”

    https://twitter.com/yashar/status/1133769548224696320

    “SOUTH HAMPTON, N.H. — Eighty-six-year-old Roy Syvertson is recovering after being bitten by a bat in his New Hampshire home.

    Syvertson told WMUR that he was sitting in his living room, using his iPad, when he got an unpleasant surprise.

    “It felt like a little bee sting,” he said. “And I looked, and the bat was coming out of here, between the cover and the back of the pad.”

    The man said he started to press down on the cover to keep the bat from flying away.

    He said he took the bat outside and set him free, but when the bat was still there the next morning, Syvertson sensed trouble.

    Officials told him to go to the hospital to start rabies treatment.

    It was a good thing he did, because the bat tested positive for rabies.

    “It was a good thing I didn’t decide to cuddle him a little,” Syvertson said.

    While he’s on the road to recovery, he wants to warn others to be vigilant about unwanted guests. ”

    https://abc7.com/5321222/

    1. Suthenboy

      All bats have rabies. Never come into contact with a bat.
      I like bats but deliberately coming into contact with one is suicide.. I distribute Spanish moss around my property for them to roost in. They eat huge numbers of mosquitoes. I aint petting any bats.

  30. Count Potato

    “I’ve been a sexworker since I was 19, and I’ve never seen so much concentrated energy being put so openly into hunting and harassing of sex workers, just because they exist and have sex. There have always been assholes. But this is not just “normal” stuff. This is WAY past that.”

    https://twitter.com/mistressmatisse/status/1133501486493650944

    1. Count Potato

      “A Germany-based Chinese programmer said he and some friends have identified 100k porn actresses from around the world, cross-referencing faces in porn videos with social media profile pictures. The goal is to help others check whether their girlfriends ever acted in those films.”

      https://twitter.com/yiqinfu/status/1133215940936650754

      1. Heroic Mulatto

        OSINT is OSINT.

        *shrugs*

      2. Florida Man

        Is it really a big deal if your girl is hot enough that people want to pay to see her naked?

        1. BEAM’s not a team player

          Is it really a big deal if your girl is hot enough that people want to pay to see her naked?

          I don’t think that’s what would have worried me — I’d be much more worried about the disease-free status of the various partners she (or he!) would have had during their career. With relatively few couplings amongst “professionals,” there could be hundreds of disease vectors that you’d have to be concerned about, possibly an order of magnitude or higher than you’d be worried about with the “average” partner.

          I was extremely “choosy” during the 1980s when AIDS had just become a big deal and its transmission vectors were still poorly understood. If I was dating today, I’m not sure I’d be dating at all. That Fleshlight™ would be mighty attractive!

          1. Not Adahn

            If that’s what you’re really concerned about you can just you can just have her get tested. There’s not some magical undetectable whore disease that sneaks up on you when you’re not looking.

          2. Akira

            just have her get tested.

            I don’t think that would go over too well with most women.

      3. Mad Scientist

        Databases full of women!

  31. Heroic Mulatto

    Last night was the best night of my life, i asked my crush if she wanted to come over and she said sure we just hung out for the afternoon and in the end she decided to stay at my place for the night. I thought fuck yes this is great, and since we didn’t have a spare bed for her to sleep in she slept in my bed with me. After a while of watching netflix in bed together we kissed, and then that slowly escalated to us having sex it was amazing and the best night of my life, we then fell asleep together and the next morning when i woke up i was in a wagon surrounded by 3 strangers and the one across from me said “Hey you, you’re finally awake.”

    1. Police Wagon or Radio Flyer?

      1. Heroic Mulatto

        Nordic.

      2. Spudalicious

        I was thinking Conestoga.

    2. LJW

      You got a Skyrim job?

      1. Heroic Mulatto

    3. The Bearded Hobbit

      Dear Penthouse,

    4. Suthenboy

      I did tell the story about my wife pointing out to me that many movie characters get caught in fantastical events because they are fantastic. I know I did.

      1. Suthenboy

        I know I did tell that story I meant.