People
Pedestrians. The worst place for them is Santa Clara California, signage everywhere, but drivers are assholes, very dangerous for walkers.
Worst pedestrians are in Santa Monica, it’s all about them, signs be damned, and they are all pedestrian favorable, WTF?
People are fat, there I said it, HO LEE Fuck. We are a truly gifted nation.
Waffle House makes a fine biscuits and gravy.
Grifters, it goes from a cigarette to a beer to a ride to 20 bucks for drugs.
Dogs are fine for motels but kittahs, not so much, we sent her back to Cali.
Here’s a dog in action.
You always want to be close to Walmart, everything revolves around them, Target, Home Depot, Panera, Chipotle, Dollar Tree, the list goes on.
Find a good beer store and try the local stuff, if it sucks they always have West/East coast alternatives.
Gallery of Colorado beers I have tried.
Met a man named Sam, he runs the Torture Chamber at the Larkspur Renaissance Fair, nice guy.
Back at my normal job, EMS systems, people complain about the traffic. Yes, it’s horrible but I have one word, you want bad? 210 Freeway anytime.
Moving day is a drag, you start the day before work, reservations, loadout, etc. then off.
Las Cruces, NM
Nice place on the Rio Grande, got a carnitas burrito that was all carnitas, nothing else happened. On Monday, I arrive at the job site to find that the local electricians installed my entire system, which sounds great until it dawns on you who did the work, so I spent the next three days cleaning up the project, and, yes, it works fine.
Bella is a fantastic dog for traveling and living like this, quiet, no potty mistakes while I’m at work, and just a love puppy. We walk and drink a lot, and meet people like Lorenzo.
Lorenzo is an old cholo from Texas, and was working at the missile range. We talked and drank in the evenings about kids, life travel the whole nine yards. Lots of pizza and weed, and good camaraderie, when him and I both realized we would be stuck one more day, barbeque! Cheddar brats and cheddar bacon burgers, a real fun time.
BTW, that’s Erwin our Native American Friend.
Where is Lorenzo? I always ask before taking pictures of people, and tell them I’m a writer, doing writer type stuff, he said no pictures, but yes to the story, and that’s cool. I’m not Time Pool or Dan Rather, just a guy on the road, telling tales from America.
An unafraid roadrunner decided to taunt Bella, so I let her stalk the little shit, and he totally toyed with the dog, funny stuff there.
Off to the Colorado River for family, rest and party; Bullhead City to be precise.
I’m a Rocket Man.
I did make it to my daughter’s house, chilling well.
Comments
266 responses to “Motel Living Random Thoughts”
Nice, like the format reminds me of Thomas Sowell’s ‘random thought’ pieces, or was that Walter Williams?
Jack Handey
That’s deep.
Jonah Goldberg
Jay Nordlinger…
Herb Caen?
Ted Bundy?
I think both, I like it too, I can come back to the motel and scribble them down before I forget,
“If you ever fall off the Sears Tower,
just go real limp, because maybe
you’ll look like a dummy and people
will try to catch you because, hey, free dummy.”
Happy trails, y’all!
Thanks for sharing.
Thank.You! I like your Avatar, migh e pretty face!
::blushes::
Thank you. I figure I’m doxxed so why not show my real face?
Good gravy, that Bella on the bed shot. She needs a tummy rub; such a cutie.
Pet my Ears Dad, then ROLL!, Belly Rubs!
Every time, little turd…
Those little foldy-paws, they’re irresistible.
Very nice. Faire folk are good people to be around, if not necessarily people to be depended on.
agreed, those I have met are mostly level headed, mostly…
I have never been out to the west coast. Sounds terrible, really.
The Westren States are some of the most Beautiful places in the World, that’s why they part of the USA, moreover, tons of Ranching, Ag and Guns, and no slimy humidity, it’s not what you think.
I’d probably love the desert, but I’ll never know. And I’m ok with that.
timing is everything to enjoy the desert, and the nature of the desert changes, sometimes drastically depending on where you are, Awesome really, AC required
In the real desert, A/C works kinda shitty. A/C lowers humidity, and works better with humid air.
Swamp Coolers are the bomb, though.
Take your kids camping in Jedidiah Smith state park. I’d bet money you’d change that to Some parts sound terrible.
I’m sure you are right. There are good and bad aspects to almost anywhere.
One of these days I plan to make a trip to see the giant sequoias. I think that would be amazing.
next week, Donner Pass, Big Trees there, Maybe STEVE SMITH, I will report…
And there’s more to West Coast than California (sorry CaliGlibs)
https://youtu.be/U9kr-S7-Z5U
https://youtu.be/6MhoO6er_Gc
Agreed, the farther north you go, the more it changes again, I still haven’t been past Redding CA, hoping for Seattle just because
And the one song that almost makes me cry to think about CA now
https://youtu.be/Yy57Xdk9u0o
One of the best moments I’ve had was totally jet lagged parked on a road overlooking the beach next to LAX on a warm September afternoon
This one gets to me for the same type of thing.
Driving thru the desert into CA at sunrise.
Cali has incredible desert, fantastic mountains, interesting coastal regions and surprisingly good hunting. California also has horrible people in government and wannabe slavers cheering them on.
Tis a waste. I don’t want to even change planes in the state now.
Me too.
I’ll miss the beach and body boarding, but have no desire to go back.
This New Yorker misses the weather in SF but not the people.
I lived in the Bay Area for 45 years. Every time I visit my kids, it’s worse. Nothing makes me happier that seeing the Sierras in the rear view mirror.
Thanks, yusef! I used to travel constantly for work, but I liked to relax alone. I could never understand why someone would sit next to me at an empty bar when I would be at the farthest seat from the door.
About 7 years ago, I spent two weeks in Milwaukee by myself. I tried like hell to find people at bars and such to talk to. I had no luck. It kinda sucked.
Sorry if it was you I was trying to be friendly to.
So that was you!
Stop tapping your feet under the stall at everyone!
I hope kitteh is in good hands.
Kitty’s dont require much to thrive. They are predators that can handle themselves quite well.
There is a feral tomcat that hangs around my barn. I see him from time to time. I have never given him anything and he seems fine.
my Kittah is 20 years old, mostly indoor, and thinks she is tougher than she is, so she stays home, Bella must be controlled, and I trust no one to take care of her, except me.
Yeah, ferals can take care of themselves. They also don’t tend to survive very long. IIRC Yusef’s is an old housecat. They don’t fare as well out in the wild.
I often feel sorry for cats, since it must suck being both predator and prey — it’s no wonder that they’re so scared.
Then one will do something to piss me off and I get over it.
How far west is Waffle House now? CO? AZ?
CO AFAICT,
Rhywun, Kittah is at the old homestead, kicking it in the shade
That’s our House Schism. I love Waffle House and, at one point, could claim to have eaten at every single location in Florida. Wifey, however, worked her way through college as a Cracker Barrel waitress.
My wife wants to go to Cracker Barrel and not eat.
The country store…
Hmmm…If I’m gonna judge based on taste, I gotta do WH for food, and CB for shopping. I don’t really want to know what the hell there might be to buy at an Awful Waffle*.
*Just a fun name–their pecan waffles are WFO.
Thoughts 3 and 4 may be related.
Ha same thought here
LOLOLOLOL! I didn’t see that!
Naptown Bill, if you are here.
I just saw your post earlier about your Romanian tt33. I have the exact same pistol and it’s fun to shoot, if a little snappy. It also doubles well as a club.
Be careful that you have a good back stop, especially if you are shooting combloc milsurp fmj ammo. That bottle neck round will penetrate more than you think.
The Walmart in Las Cruces is the worst in the country
quite an achievement
It was located in the worst spot possible, and the signage faced the Wrong Way, truly a wonder of nature…..
The one in St Croix, VI, post Xmas, looked like the day before a hurricane was expected. Shelves were barren. Clean though.
St. Croix has a Walmart? Things seemed to have changed a bit since I was there in ’88.
Yeah, I was there in ’98. I’m guessing the Xmas rush picked over everything plus restocking is a little more difficult that in the US. May have solved that by now.
Oh-oh things may have changed
“Does Saint Croix have a Walmart?
no there is 2 kmarts and a home depot buliding but no walmart” from Answers.com
I may have been in a Kmart and not a Walmart.
Can confirm.
Is that a new addition to their menu? I do not remember those being a thing.
Of course, I mostly ate there during the “all you can eat” menu phase, which was more limited than the full menu.
I asked my son if they served bisquits and gravy, and got the Are you Fucking Serious look, so there’s that
My local one has always had them…
My daughter worked there thru HS ans some of college.
On a Saturday morning, she could clean up $200 serving coffee to the geriatric smokers.
I don’t recall them on the menu back i the 90’s. However, the last few times I went, gravy was definitely an option for the hash browns, as was every other non-entree item, it seems.
I do NOT want to know about the person who gets browns with both chili and gravy.
I always tip the hell out of the waitresses in those places.
^What RC says.^
The one in Parker, Colorado serves them.
You are doing well on the nomadic trail, Yusef. All bases covered. You’re not one of them Romanian fellers that travel in a caravan of trailers like some of them Eurapeein people, are ye?
Glad to hear everything is good under the circumstances. You’re a sociable type, unlike some of us.
Thanks agent 82, we are finally saving money instead of bleeding it, Wife gets out of Hospital on Saturday, then Off to SF!
If we do things right,we will have place in AZ by say Thanksgiving?
Good on ya Sir!
What part of AZ? I like to dream that one day I might have a place there again.
Greeter Phoenix, which is large in itself,
Ah, The other LA – the one with the beach without an ocean.
I went to grad school up there. Better than Cali but not by much – but that’s just my opinion. Too difficult to find places to shoot in the desert that aren’t 4 hours away.
Go Tucson! I am not a fan of the greater Phx metro area.
There are lots of shooting spots just north of Phoenix on Tonto NF and BLM land. Summers often have restrictions for fire danger.
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/trump-picks-counterterrorism-chief-as-interim-intel-head/ar-AAFxCZw?li=BBnbfcL
so how hard was that, really ?
Huh. She doesn’t look anything like a coyote.
My thoughts as well, but if you zoom on the re picture you can see they are very beautiful birds, I had no idea
I always thought the Road Runner was a bit of a dick.
As I got into middle school I started rooting for Tom.
Spike.
Very much so.
NAP, anyone? You get some dipshit constantly trying to tag you with rockets and other explosives…well, I think you get a bit of a pass on perceived dickishness.
/fake tunnels? GMAFB…
It’s a little known fact that the Road Runner fucked Wile E. Coyote’s wife.
OHHHHHH!! Gotcha…
Makes much more sense now.
“Beep beep” suddenly becomes a whole more clearer.
Followed by that tongue action as well!
“Honk honk”
“Time for a little ‘feather duster’ action, bae!”
My club has posted next month’s AP stages. It looks like fun. I’ve never seen a stage with a plate rack before. Apparently there is a theme about shooting through windows.
I invite anyone with the necessary legalities taken care of to come and shoot.
Nice article, Yusef! You definitely know how to make life on the road pleasant.
Thanks for the update Yusef.
I spent most of my life (while in the US) in the southwest and wouldn’t live anywhere else. I need desert mountains on the near horizon and plenty of space to go get away from people and go shooting. Proper Mexican food is a plus too.
Even the Mexican food changes throughout the West, truly a cool place, I should write an article…..
Mmm. That would be cool. I think my favorite is Sonoran but I am still learning
just keep the Chipotle sauce away, Blech!
/the restaurant is good though
You shut your goddamn mouth.
Ha I almost bought something similar (different brand) to make the Carolina mustard BBQ sauce someone linked.
I went with harissa instead, because lazy.
PS. it came out AMAZING.
Heck, the Mexican food changes throughout Mexico too.
A buddy of mine was riding the bus down through Chihuahua to see some relatives when the bus stopped in a little village. Across the street he sees a bakery with a sign for some kind of bread with the local name of that bread on offer for 20 Pesos. Where we grew up that name is used for a woman’s nether parts.
Burritos are definitely a northern/border food. On the west coast they make them “mission style” with rice. In Texas you might get shot for putting rice in a Burrito.
Rice was wierd at first, but I like rice, burrito or not so…..
I’m a fan of rice in burritos. I’m not picky though.
I will take damn near anything and wrap it in a tortilla, with sour cream and salsa and call it lunch.
Pinoche bread?
Panocho
Snatch bread.
I would question the yeast used in said bread.
…as long as it rises..
If that were the case, Chipotle would be non-existent here.
Then again, when I think of most of the denizens of Chipotle I have witnessed…
Hotrods.
http://imgur.com/gallery/ZwUfsGu
Pipes? not rods… Cool stuff Lach,
Not pipes. Those are solid.
Pretty cool. Is the first one on the rack a special order? It’s twice as long as the others.
Reminds me of the tour I did of the Watervliet Arsenal where they were making the gun tubes for the M1A1 120mm smoothbore.
Nah. That one is what we call a starter bar. We run it up the casting machine during startup and into the mold head so that when we pour liquid steel in the mold, there is something for it to settle on.
It’s the first bar cut out. We set it to the side until next time we need to start from scratch again. Usually about 70 heats (4200 tons) later. That takes about 2 1/2 days.
That was my other thought. Cool stuff. Big toys. Feel free to share more.
Agreed. I love Lach’s industrial photography.
Damn!
Here’s Why Kias are Crap – Scotty Kilmer
Fuck him, that is all
Dan! Why they rock, look closelier,
https://photos.app.goo.gl/rh5EcpQSsU51SdaK7
Who is Dan?
Don’t ask me!
lol you share a name with Bonaduce.
Dan isn’t black enough to be my first name. My parents basically named me something like Adebowale McJewberg.
Nero Hymansen!
Was your nickname, AdaJew?
It’s a trap!
Always a good read Yusef! I did a few road trips through the west when I was single and this brings back those memories. There is a book “Blue Highways” I think it’s called that is a good read. It’s about traveling the roads less traveled – the blue highways not the red interstates.
Since I travel for work, blue isn’t always the best way if you break something, OTOH we are doing Donner and Grand Canyon Otw to Phoenix
I love that William Least Heat Moon I think
That book
I love your travelogues.
I’m building the next one, Big Trees! Just for Suthen but I have to get there first…
Thanks for sharing Yufus! You make me miss traveling.
Great stuff Yusef. I’ve stayed in many hotels and Motels my favorites have that outside entrance with a place to handout at night.
Like this
/I’m invisible,
https://photos.app.goo.gl/ETyMPSSZuxPcNmmTA
That glass of beer isn’t drinking itself
Maybe linked before, maybe not, yes Rufus some of us work.
I like this line and one and it should be repeated and repeated….
Back when the DNC was calling for gun laws to keep the guns out of the hands of bad black man. Now they want to keep guns out of the hands of everybody.
Tulip,
Maiden was a real blast.
https://imgur.com/gallery/2K5JimA
They really put on a hell of a show. Dickinson did more costume changes than lady Gaga and there was so much energy.
That sound like fun, saw them twice back in the day, a great show!
I am so jealous
I did have to pay 60$ for two drinks. That was the only down side of the whole day.
There must be a pair of pants in there, too.
FML….the link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RjynwJdgJho
Thanks for writing this up! Good read.
Man o’ man…I work in Santa Clara and walk from the train station to the office (~1mile). Every week I have a damn close call with meeting my maker trying to cross the street in the crosswalk with the walk sign on. Stupid humans do not give a flying rats ass about pedestrians and will nearly run you over while flipping you off for daring to get in their way.
Can’t wait for self driving cars…even at half as bad they’ll be amazingly better.
Skynet.. just says, Santa Clara was nuts though, I have a job on Market st SF, oh fucking joy…
I can’t wait to take pictures, it should be shitty job..
ha…I was in SF on Sat & didn’t see a single bit of human excrement! (there’s a first for everything) Depending on where you’re at on Market, it may not be too bad. At least the weather will be nice. Good luck driving through there, though.
I think they’re keeping the Financial District in decent shape. Better than going to the Tenderloin, or the Haight.
I was in the Loin today, it remains a drug zombie sanctuary. It’s fucking disgraceful. It may be my least libertarian friendly position, but they need to change the commitment rules. The pendulum swing was way too far in my opinion.
All well and good but then what do you do with all the gutter-punks in The Haight?
They’re a nuisance for sure, but they’ve been that way for as long as I have been alive. They are less of a problem than the hard core drugged out and mentally unstable hordes that have been allowed to set up camp and shit and shoot up all over.
Fair enough. I took the Stanyan bus through that area once. Didn’t want to get off.
Don’t get me wrong, some of them are violent drugged out fuckeheads. Three of them killed a Canadian girl a couple hundred yards from my house three years back. I’m not particularly enamoured by them either. I almost got in a fight with one two weeks back outside the local Safeway when I didn’t want to give him any money.
When are you coming to SF? I agree with AI, it totally depends on where you are on Market. I’m in the Outer Sunset, and we have very little (human) crap out this way. Let me know, I will try and grab a beer with you if you want.
I will, I’m still concetnrating on the current project, but Visiting could fit in for sure!
maybe later next week, say Thursday ish?
Thursday eve I could likely do. Leaving on Friday for the Sierras for four days to camp with the wife and kids.
Sweet. When you know your dates let us know. We could probably get C Anacreon over from the East Bay as well.
I will, trying to leave LA Tuesday latest
Fun fact: C Anacreon never eats the cookie.
Never.
I almost bit it walking to the Santa clara sizzler. That has to be the last sizzler in the country. Anyway, I didn’t eat there, but I had to get a picture of it.
Wrong! Las Cruces NM has a Sizzler, I was shocked
Several around here. Almost went to the one in K Falls because it was close to my hotel but it looked so depressing from the outside. I miss the excitement of going to Sizzlers with my visiting grandparents when I was a kid.
When traveling I take inspiration from the most racist and fattest man in the world, comedian Bart Chrysler, and play little pranks on unsuspecting hotel maids.
My pranks usually consist of me shitting in my hand and smearing my feces all over the carpet and ceiling and drapes, but Burnt has some fun ones, too.
I leave cigar butts in the trash,
It is 2019 so that may be worse than fecal play. I mean, you are causing cancer…
I am Cancer
I never noticed you were crabby.
In case there was any confusion as to whether or not Chrysler is in fact racist, here’s definitive proof.
Well, he was pretty good in the Goonies.
Doug Stanhope is quoted on the official description page of a University of Melbourne subject, and it’s a great quote!
Bella and I had a pound vm of carnitas in green sauce, yummy, next is my newest Chipotle away!
Up at 4am, PC out my Glibs!
Do you know who else like rockets?
Elton John?
IFKWIM.
Herbie Hancock?
Speaking of Herbie, I caught this one today that I had never herd before. Damn, that man has some funk. Love the analogue electronic shit.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Eq7wSIDjAes
Listening to that in my headphones as I walk around the supermarket. Uncanny how it matches the obasans squeezing melons.
That entire album is all kinds of great.
Well Herbie is a Soka Gakkai member.
They do love to point that out.
I like the Soka concept. It’s kinda libertarianish in a way.
They have a belief system that puts itself above the state, so that’s good. And they’re super nice people. Remind me of Mormons.
That was kind of the vibe that I picked up from a Falun Gong member that I worked for a couple months back. We got to talking and she got pretty emotional talking about what she saw and knew about. By her age and the time she emigrated she must have had a front row seat for the Great Leap Forward. She was very dismayed by the socialist trend here.
The Rockit music video is his magnum opus.
Three ex-Bauhaus members?
Very nice.
Houston?
/no, not the porn st-Well….maybe.
Biden Says ‘Poor Kids’ Are Just as Smart as ‘White Kids’ in Iowa
lol. I can’t wait until two old, wealthy, white men who can’t stop sharing opinions and saying stupid things are the choices to lead the freest and most powerful country in the world.
…Fuck yeah?
“ He quickly added, “Wealthy kids, black kids, Asian kids, no I really mean it, but think how we think about it”
That made less sense than his first statement.
Now do poor white kids. ?
We think how we’re going to dumb it down.
But brought about yourself Joe…
*but enough about
still Trump, business over Socialism…
Nice, Yusef. I’d imagine patience is a necessary virtue when living like that. No dog myself, so I’m vicariously adopting Bella.
Bella licks your Face!
U.S. Intel Officials Eye Disinformation Campaign Targeting John Bolton’s Family
I pretend to be as anti-war as the next cosmo squish traitor, but I think this clearly means we should bomb the, and excuse my language, tar out of these greasy animals.
“Tar”, CJ? You were just talking about the cancer-causing effects of smoking, up-thread…
Why do you hate us so?
Would be nice if it were true.
Fuck John Bolton. With a rusty dildo.
Player Haters
Too hot to link.
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EBaDst6XsAEO-xe?format=jpg&name=small
If that’s real, it’s just too good.
He could quote Jesus Christ and the media would report his incendiary and hateful language.
Sermon on the mount is a literal dog whistle.
Greek-Supremacist?
Raising the dead is violence against the trans deceased bodies and a denial of their lived lives. I can’t even the othering of those who identify as sick.
Just wanted to add my own little touch to that.
If you’re still around, Yusef: Excellent write-up/travelogue. Give Bella tummy rubs and snacks.
“Not good judgment”, eh?
Awesome! Now, do the rest of your life. I’ll wait…..
When he was asked by reporters why the other man looked like a “white supremacist,” Attey said that he was a white male, and pleasant looking.
Nice.
Also what he did shouldn’t be illegal, but what an ass.
And any gun can kill 200 people. Or 1000. Or none. You know, it’s a tool. Same can be said of a hammer.
Good ol’ Fuckwit Phil. He’s truly dumber than advertised.
It was inevitable that we’d end up in this place where a large portion of America thinks “white supremacy” is a thing. It’s not like the civil rights movement would pack up their bags in 1982 and say, “Welp, we’ve gotten rid of overt and egregious racism. Now we can let people sort the rest out.”
I still remember lettering practice in grade school using portions of MLK’s Dream speech.
A thousand years ago and another country.
Yep. I’d don’t think I’d fit in back in 2019 USA. I’m an anarchoism.
I see what you did there.
/I think I see
Hey Straff! Key me in on the venue for tonight. I know the station – just not the shop.
Police are not pressing charges against Attey for the alarming episode.
And you get more of what you reward.
“He meant well.”
Fur Rhywun: Hahaha. Germans aren’t quite ready to almost triple the tax on meat
https://www.powerlineblog.com/archives/2019/08/germans-rebel-against-tax-on-meat.php
A sensible people. They’re starting to revolt against the Energiewende crap, too. Apparently, tripling your energy bill wasn’t terribly appealing after all.
I’m feeling the German tonite. I got some Richard Dorfmeister going after my Herbie Hancock kick.
So…………………phrasing?
/I have no idea
That did sound extra gay
I am listening to German electronica
That only sounds kinda gay
Tuesdays with Derpy part 4
part 3 here: https://glibertarians.com/2019/07/saturday-night-links-of-absurditydraft/#comment-1097752
***
You got a letter and it looks important, said the college kid as he entered the old man’s room.
Ah, the good ol’ US Postal Service, thought the old man. Those guys are giving the cockroaches a run for their money.
It was a angry-looking letter with lots of red ink and the words FINAL NOTICE- IMMEDIATE ACTION REQUIRED!
I forgot where I put my reading glasses, said the old man. Could you read it to me please?
The college kid opened it and began reading: You are receiving this notice because you are delinquent in your PanopticonBook account.
To avoid fines and penalties, you must log into your account at once and post the following:
1. a comment praising your local government
2. a picture of the last meal you ate
3. a comment praising the state government
4. a video of you criticizing something; see below for the list of acceptable targets
5. a comment praising the national government
6. a comment giving your full name, age, address, employer, Social Security number, and phone number
7. a picture of your face no more than 24 hours older than the postmark of this notice
8. a lolcat picture
The old man sighed heavily. It’s bad enough I get bombarded with their propaganda and now they’re forcing me to write it for them, he said.
Do you even have a PanopticonBook account, asked the college kid.
I did a really long time ago, said the old man. It was called something else back then. That was before the gubmint seized it.
How did things get like this, asked the college kid.
The old man paused to gather his thoughts. He rubbed his chin. Then he spoke:
About 200 years ago, life was tough for everyone. Most people had to work very hard just to stay alive and many died young.
The world was also a much more dangerous place. And even rich people couldn’t buy the things we take for granted today.
Slowly, over the next hundred years or so, technology improved and things steadily got better.
I’d say overall, technology peaked when I was a kid. The last great invention was the internet and that was about 70 years ago.
Anyway, as things got better, life got easier, and people became dumber and weaker.
In the past, you had to be some combo of smart, strong, sexy, and lucky to live long and prosper.
But as technology made everyone richer, we reached a point where any moron or jackass could survive and have kids.
That process was nearly complete when I was about your age. Things took a turn for the worse when you-know-who got elected.
When you-know-who got re-elected, the country collapsed. The red countryside became deep red and the blue cities became deep blue.
It’s been that way for about 40 years now and it will probably stay that way, the old man said as he plopped down on the couch.
Cheer up, said the college kid. I got you a present.
It was a belt. The buckle was in the shape of an onion.
You know, I didn’t really wear an onion on my belt, said the old man. That was just a joke from an old TV show.
…T…V?, asked the college kid. Is that like NPR?
The old man laughed. Yeah, I guess it was. I just wasn’t smart enough to see it back then, said the old man.
Well, I guess I should go take some of those whatcha-call-it…selfies?, the old man wondered aloud.
The college kid laughed. Heh, I learned about those in history class. What a stupid fad!
***
OK, Big Band Theory aside–I kinda want this.
Big BANG Theory.
Big Band Theory might actually make for a quality program.
Big Bang Theory?!
[facepalm]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Rzao52ndNA
No, no….the buckles, man!
Kids these days.
What, with their hippity-hoppity music….
Enema Man and Snoopy Snoopy Poop Dog
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yrYx-rhIiLE
I didn’t think I would laugh that much. I was incorrect.
Ahh, pubic hair coke and long dong silver. Those were the days.
I’ve heard that we could use a man like Herbert Hoover again.
I don’t buy it, but, I dig what you’re layin’ down, bruthah!
Wall-e meets Idiocracy. Read “We” by Zamyatin. HM has delved into a lot deeper than I have, but to me it was the most interesting of all the dystopian novels I’ve read. And I made the mistake of binging on them last year. Never read 1984, Fahrenheit 451, We, Fountainhead, Brave New World, Stranger in a Strange Land in a row over 3 months. That really fucked with my head.
I got about half-way through We one time. Holy crap it’s twisted. Not an easy read.
It’s certainly more twisted than the others. I love Russian writers, though, so I slogged through it. “We” demands you to fully emerge yourself in the world he created otherwise it’s unreadable.
I felt the same way during the 50 pages or so I managed of A Canticle for Leibowitz.
I am on the road as well. As of today, I have been to 48 states. Michigan will be #49 and I will save Hawaii for another time.
Some highlights:
I got pulled over in Illinois. I haven’t set foot in that state for almost 6 years, and the first day I return, stopped by a cop. The cop was super chill. He had me come back and sit in the squad car and got to watch as he punched my name into the skuh-mods (State. County. Municipal. Offender. Data. System.) computer. He let me go with a warning. The offense was following too closely. I get the feeling he was close to the end of his shift and he needed to pull someone over to make his quota.
I had some un-pasteurized Bavarian-style lager in Missouri. The difference in taste is like dry white toast vs. 4 fried chickens. Try un-pasteurized beer if you can find it.
The Omaha zoo was a hoot. I really liked the indoor jungle. There were bats flying at my face. I’m pretty sure one guano’d me. It was like being in Africa again.
I landed on the planet Klendathu, aka Hell’s Half Acre. I crawled under a barbed wire fence to get a better picture of the place.
Also in Wyoming, I bought a great book at a gas station called Neither Predator Nor Prey. It’s a great libertarian action story. A leftist govt tries to disarm the people of Wyoming and hilarity ensues. Wyoming is by far my favorite state. Great scenery, friendly people, no traffic, except in Yellowstone.
The nuclear reactor museum in Idaho is fabulous. Fans of the Fall Out games will love it. They have an exhibit where you can use the big mechanical hands to practice moving around stuff like a Cold War era nuclear technician.
Today, I drove through the Columbia river gorge, thus completing the Oregon trail for real. In your face, dysentary!
“True. So true….”
Sir Francis Bacon
Also, would like to read your travelogue/write up article, to compliment Yusef’s.
That is, if you’re willing.
Hmm. I like to keep things casual, so I’ll just stick with comments for the time being. One of my goals was to not touch a computer during my road trip and I failed.
Eh, no biggy. I hiked to the top of Multnomah Falls today. What a spectacular view!
Well, will eagerly read.
Are you free from work/on holiday? If so, is this a special occasion, or, more a “just taking a trip I always wanted to take” thing?
A little bit of column A and a little bit of column B.
::nods knowingly::
Glad you liked it. It’s easy to get complacent when it’s just another mile marker along the freeway.
Lord, is it ever. I have always loved driving (OK, road trip-type driving), but, once I got into my 40’s it stopped being a fun adventure, and became more of a, “Can I manage to stay awake, in spite of the road hypnosis?” kind of adventure.
I hate every fucking thing about Illinois. Asshole drivers, asshole panhandlers, asshole politicians, asshole weather, asshole tourists, asshole assholes.
Sorry. That should’ve read “Chicago”.
I lived there for few years. Great food, good place to do stand-up comedy, awful place to live.
Do you hate Illinois Nazis?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZTT1qUswYL0
Is it assholes, all the way down?
Concentric assholes into infintissimality.
Fantastic album name, straff.
Or, you’re secretly Agile Cyborg.
Mind blown
Oh, yes–very powerful voice.
Derpy vs skuh-mods, artist’s depiction:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G1aIGqrGqnU
Probably just ILETS these days….
Nope, it’s LEADS
Day two of my battle against the mold/stain in the shower. It gets between the tiles and is a bitch to get out. Used power kabi killer (mold removal) cleanser. Almost. Doused the entire shower room in the stuff and now I’m getting light headed. It’s blindingly clean now except for a few stubborn spots that stand out more than ever against the whiteness. Sigh.
(psst – white out – or toothpaste if the surface is grtty enough)
Truly is a “psst” cuz if my wife caught me using it, she’d murder me. I’m using my kid’s uwabaki cleaning paste. It works.
I feel a song coming on…
♫ Captain Beato! He’s our hero! Pay attention before his polls drop to zero!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGegECwSiGY
From South America, Mai-Tai, with the power of drunk driving….
Not really ‘punk’ enough for Mr. Rolled-up Sleeves.
But he is dreamy…
::projectile vomits::
The Twinkie Defense in the Age of Trump
Good to see Lionel Hutz is still on the job.
The greatest law talking guy of all time…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HODjrjb32fU
Behind every great
law-talkin’ guylawyer is a bottle of hooch and an aging folk singer.There’s always this guy too https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=2AzAFqrxfeY
The man was made to play lawyers on TV.
/love the commercials
https://www.kmbc.com/article/man-with-rifle-taken-into-custody-at-walmart-in-missouri/28651482
We really do have too many nutjobs out there.
Also, a good guy with a gun makes an appearance.
Founder’s Dirty Bastard, excellent choice.
I like these write-ups.