Author: Brett L

The oldest started kindergarten today. Apparently, taking your kids to their classroom on the first day is something that parents do now. Whatever, I feel bad enough about sending my kid to kiddie jail without having to see how the sausage is made. I took my wife for a drink afterwards. Because, yeah, we’re those kinds of parents. Man, was it quiet in the house today. It was… excellent.

Russian government to citizens: Oops, we fucked up. You should probably leave your homes.

Deep State working against Trump impeachment! Or, you know, just doing their jobs.

I am so disappointed about the details of this fatal taco eating contest.

Its SugarFree’s timeline, we’re just living in it.

Happy Monday! My co-worker who was wearing the architect hat for this project is leaving for greener pastures in a month. So I just received a field promotion to architect. Whee. I need to ask my boss if I can have the difference between the salary I am making and the salary co-worker was making. Anyhow, I have no desire to remold this project in my image, so I’m just gonna try to finish the way it started.

Would you like to play a game? And of course, the article gets the wrong Matthew Broderick movie reference.

Bottom study of the day – lonely young men are far more likely to become extreme. Umm, yeah. Even Bill Maher had this figured out in 2002.

I wish every mass shooting ended like this. Good on ya, Mr. Rafiq.

I like how the best case in the Epstein death is massive incompetence. These are the same people you’d have to trust to protect you from harm if a gun ban came down.

Happy Monday.

My younger son turns 4 tomorrow. Four. I no longer have toddlers in my house. Just tiny, opinionated people who have mood swings like drunk people on pills. So happy birthday to the T-Wrecks, my little space invader. No seriously, he’s like a cat. As soon as you sit down, he wants to drape himself all over you. Four years ago about now, we went by the hospital and they sent us home, then we went to pick up a “going home” infant outfit because he obviously wasn’t waiting for September. At 5:00 the next morning, Mrs. L told me she was pretty sure it was time to go. Me: “are you like, super sure? Could I go into work first and do a couple of things?” By the time they got her situated and the nurses did a “test push”, he was ready to eject. I had to drop our older son off with a friend and come back, while the nurses went for the doc. I got back, she pushed, and we had another tiny human.

On the links front, OMWC put up about 5 days worth of links, including some replays of mine from yesterday, so I’ll see what I can find here…

I’m told that this sort of thing only happens in capitalist horrorshows, not enlightened socialist paradises.

Names are being named now that Jeffrey Epstein is going down.

A bank in Denmark is going to offer 20 year mortgages at zero interest, ten years at -0.5%. I imagine that the origination fees and such must be incredible.

The major question about this proposed German ‘meat tax’: At what rate is long pig taxed?

..and Youtube is giving me the fuckoff again, so bring your own music.

Hey guys, its a beautiful day. I finally beat my wife at darts — which neither of us is great at — for the first time. Then she bit me. I almost forgot that she was a biter when we met. She managed to eke out a victory in our second game, but that was also much closer than usual. Maybe if we played more often than once every six to ten weeks, we’d both get decent at it. I also commend to all of you mexican sharpshooter’s awesome STEVE SMITH totally not based on true events story from mid-day.

Florida bums have fight to death outside of McDonalds. Gotta love bums.

I’ll just get up on my hobby horse and post another alternative calculation of galactic scale gravitational forces that don’t require dark matter. This is just cool because they also used it to calculate how much energy it takes to uncoil DNA. Entropy is crazy and fascinating and the math makes my head hurt.

I eagerly await calls for common sense knife controls after a rash of mass stabbings.

This dude make Ryan Leaf look like a stable genius. Some people have such horrible mental health problems they’re beyond help. Unless by help you mean locking them away forever somewhere.

I can confirm. Nobody thinks I’m unproductive at work.

New music from a band who definitely does not take itself too seriously.

Its hump day. I can tell because I been humpin’ all over the place trying to get work done. Come on, cocktail hour!

Damn. Nobody beats Alabama Woman in her kitchen.

When vegetarians turn into butchers (no this is not about the Earth Day founder guy)

Oh man, I eagerly await all the news outlets abasing themselves for misgendering a murdered trans-man

This guy is about to be unpersoned

I think I like this song.

So, I went to the dermatologist today, because my wife insisted that I get checked for cancer. Her dad had some pretty bad melanoma before he got the other cancer, so I didn’t put up a fight. And boy am I glad I didn’t. The doc was a complete smoke show. I haven’t been touched by a woman that hot since… well, the last time I paid someone that hot to touch me. Anyhow, I now look forward to my annual skin cancer screening. She didn’t find any alarming growths, but only because I was thinking really hard about baseball and cold showers.

Florida Man, you’re supposed to do wacky and dangerous things that injure yourself, not this. I hope your mamma brings several of her coworkers around to beat some sense into you.

Although, maybe not beating someone so badly they get brain damage. Dude should try that on someone his own size.

I got the following note: STEVE SMITH SAD THAT INSPIRATION FOR HIS FILM, “STEVE SMITH KNOW WHY CAGED HIKER SQUEAL” DEAD. I would not want to be caught by the rapesquatch tonight

This is somebody’s fetish, and probably has a big future in teledildonics

My son had decided this is his favorite song. Sometimes being a parent is actually not all that different from being psychologically tortured by tiny, sadistic sociopaths.

DOOM! All is lost, woe is us. Wait, actually, its not that bad. But the first link reveals why the idea of a libertarian society is a pipe-dream, albeit one that keeps most of us from publishing manifestos and shooting random people just trying to do school shopping. Wait, actually, I think not being crazy does that.

The headline here pretty much shows why libertarianism will never be popular: Ohio shooting: Gov. Mike DeWine urged to ‘Do something’ at vigil. Okay. What should he do? Hand out the names of people who teach concealed-carry courses? Put everyone in camps so they can’t murder each other with guns?

Fucking bath-dodgers

Oh look, another new trend I was unwittingly on the bleeding edge of.

I assume it was the erection that gave him away.

My Youtube started working, so I’ll post a free-speech anthem that is… does math… wait… 25 years old? Fuck me. This is contemporary with my teens. It cannot have been that long ago.

Happy Friday afternoon, y’all. We picked up my father-in-law’s remains yesterday. Its not quite a coffee can, but The Big Lebowski wasn’t kidding about the cost of urns at funeral homes. Amazon is sending us a, er, more dignified storage container at a more reasonable price. Anyhow, we haven’t had any… unintended releases yet. But Florida Man is never far from us.

Florida Man continues to flirt with Hep A, causing state to declare a crisis.

Don’t blame me, I’m rooting for SMOD.

People keep holding other people’s drugs in the weirdest places.

This is rage inducing.

My oldest had his placement test for kindergarten, and it does not appear that either my wife or I will have to make the same sacrifice as Forrest Gump’s mother to get him into normal classes. Also, luckily, nobody mentioned toilets, so the lady administering the test didn’t have to get a brain-dump from a monmaniacal five year old. You might think I’m exaggerating, but he watches videos about fixing toilets on YouTube. While he was staying with my wife’s aunt and uncle last week, her uncle gave him a flapper, and replacement valve(?) stand. The boy knew exactly what they were, and you’d think he’d just been given a BB gun at Christmas. At least he’ll be out of my pocket at 18, right?

Slapfight between two large pill pushers.

Good people are everywhere.

Attention OMWC — prescription changes may be coming.

This is cool. Creating a “repair cafe” run entirely by people with autism. I wonder if the dude in the picture knows he looks like Dustin Hoffman.

Also, play along with the newest Glibs meme, “Some animals are more equal than others. It’s right there in the how-to manual…” (add your own clever wrong answer here!)

…and YouTube is still taking a shit on me, so add your own theme music.

Well, here I am again. I just want to call out the totally justified criticism of using Lobster Girl to cover weak links yesterday. Totally justified. So you get what you get for a featured image, and you can judge the strength of the links for yourself.

China abruptly announces release of nearly 1M Muslims, saying they need the space for Hong Kongers. Okay, I made up the 2nd clause, but does that really make it untrue?

Oh man, the Feds are gonna go on a rape spree over this: Parents transferring custody of children to less wealthy individuals to get the kids more financial aid. Book a room at Club Fed, folks.

I approve of the response time here. Less than five minutes from 911 call to engaging the shooter. If anyone deserves to be shot at Walmart, I nominate this chick.

Well, I found the new Glibertarian secret lair site.

Also, I think YouTube is throttling me. I haven’t been able to get a damn thing to play since I got back from vacation. All the shit loads except playback, so no music for you.