Man, is there anyone at this site that’s easy to follow with links? Swiss knocked it out of the park… as usual. Happy Veteran’s Day to those who served.
This may be a perfectly legitimate ruling in keeping with standard practices, but I have no earthly idea what actually happened based on this article.
Look at Robin Hood over here. I’m gonna guess from the quality of the description and the fact that the suspect was “known to the victims” that the attacker might have been also homeless. Maybe CA should require a verified domicile before selling archery equipment.
Looks like that boat-rowing thing is for real after all. And so is Lovie! The Buckeyes did what they do to everybody this year (without the best defensive player in the NCAA being sidelined because the powers that be are fucked in the head), and Bama was finally exposed after playing a team with a pulse. I’m interested to see how the CFP shuffles the deck after some untested teams were finally tested and after Bama lost to the only ranked team they’ve faced all year to this point.
In the NFL, there were a couple big upsets, including the Chefs going down. The Dolphins actually won a game, meaning the Bungles are officially the worst team around (edit: after the Ravens beat them like so many others have done this year). The Browns won, which will pull a few people off suicide watch. And the Steelers keep grinding and actually sit in a wild card spot. Which is just amazing to me.
Pep telling the fourth official how many goals he lost by
Oh yeah, and Liverpool thrashed Man City to put a stranglehold on the PL. Arsenal are circling the drain and Chelski and Leicester keep impressing. Last international break of the year coming up now. Let’s see what new low the USMNT can reach during it.
“Hey Kurt, you read lips? Fuck you!”
Fyodor Dosteyevsky was born on this day. He shares it with General George Patton, medical pioneer Joseph Hamilton, writer (and actor) Kurt Vonnegut, scumbag politician Barbara Boxer, corrupt politician Corinne Brown, golfer and bad joke-maker Fuzzy Zoeller, actress Demi Moore, underrated actor Stanley Tucci, and actor and exclusive dater of women under 25 Leonardo DiCaprio.
OK, now let’s see what the world has going on with…the links!
Jesus, hasn’t this family suffered enough already? My heart goes out to them. And I pray they’ll receive justice in the form of that cop going away for a very, very long time. Come on Texas jury. Keep your streak of holding cops accountable intact.
I kept trying to come up with a clever way to link this. But you’ll have to give me a hand coming up with one. I am honestly stumped but the story was so freaking weird I had to link it knowing that y’all will create a gaze-worthy stream of puns in the comments.
As the Supreme Court weighs DACA, the plaintiff in the case gives his thoughts. You know, there’s a simpler solution to the whole mess: Congress can stop abdicating their responsibilities on the issue to the executive branch (and changing EOs with changing administrations), and do their job writing actual legislation.
I’m driving back home from Vegas, hitting the road just as this posts, so this intro will be brief. But still, the links are ripe for commentary. Much like my underwear. But here’s a non-news link that absolutely delighted me, so I’ll leave it at that.
Old Guy Music today is classical, just to raise the tone around here. It’s the third movement of what I think is a pretty cool concerto. And it seems appropriate somehow.
Baby, it’s cold outside! It’s also Standard Daylight time, now, but, fat lot of good that does us on the night shift. The year is winding down, and, that means food, fun, and family. Or, it could mean liquor, loneliness, and…lemurs? Leather fiends? Laser-brains? Alright; so much for Diggy’s alliteration attempts. The point is, we gotta start prepping for the season (hint: I wear a 2X Tall in condoms shirts/jackets, and I prefer Samsung products). On with the stuff I do:
In crappy bar food news… I have no idea if this is bullshit, or, not. It could go either way, in my book. Of course, the most important part of the story is the lone customer who gets what I like to call the “Crusty Juggler” treatment.
Anyone have any “before the end of the year” issues to deal with? I think I’ll have a visit to the optometrist’s office, as well as some full-scale blood testing, because 50 is quickly approaching. My query, though, isn’t only about healthcare; major purchases? Travel? Any of the assorted pieces of crap life has in store for you.
I guess CVS stands for “Can’t Verify Status”? Again, I have no idea if this is bullshit, or, not. Seems like something happened. Of course, the mom sounds like a real treat; maybe Winston’s Mom could give her some pointers.
When a bakery kicks you university’s ass, and the school kinda doubles down, maybe it’s time to find another school. Hey, Oberlin: try not being such shit-heels, and maybe kick the thieves out.
I believe someone here was saying earlier that Chick-Fil-A > Popeye’s…. I guess the Fight for 15 is really about collecting hazard pay. It’s just fried chicken, you dumb shits—there’s plenty to be found all over the place!
This is totally believable—everyone knows those Pacific Islanders are all a bunch of slimy, no good, double-crossin’ swindlers.
I suppose we’ve got enough weird sh..stuff to keep us chatting through the night. If you have topics of your own you want to air out, be my guest. As the night theme for music is probably vast, but, my knowledge is limited, I will probably ditch that angle once we hit the new year. I don’t want to neglect good music just to try to fit a limited narrative. You have all been warned…
As you read this, I am likely on my way up to Las Vegas. Not to gamble- see, I was in math class the day they taught probability- and not to see a show- SP and I will do that in January, reliving our honeymoon by seeing Penn & Teller. It’s my son’s birthday, I haven’t spent his birthday with him in 10 years, and dammit, I need to, especially because it’s a reasonable drive from here. So you may be commenting without adult supervision. Behave!
Old Guy Music is a delightful cover- no flash, just perfectly rendered. And it wasn’t Glen Campbell’s song, though his cover is certainly the most famous. Ah well.
ZARDOZ SPEAKS TO YOU, HIS CHOSEN ONES. AS THE YEAR END DRAWS NEAR, WE IN THE VORTEX REVIEW OUR PLANS FROM THE PAST YEAR. THE RESULTS ARE…MIXED. SOME FAILURES, AND ONE PROMISING FUTURE STRATEGY. GO FORTH AND ANALYZE!
NOT GOOD ENOUGH (LEADING TO THE AGING OF THE ETERNAL WHO PROPOSED IT):
FAIL.
IF YOU ARE GOING TO USE REPTILES, AT LEAST MAKE SURE THEY ARE VENOMOUS. ALSO, NOT IN COLD CLIMATES. FAIL.
FISH-BRUTAL HYBRIDS ARE INTRIGUING, BUT THIS IN NO WAY LEAD TO ANY CLEANSING OF THE BRUTALS WHO PLAGUE THE EARTH. FAIL.
ZARDOZ THINKS THAT DISRUPTING MEDICAL CARE FOR BRUTALS MAY BE A BETTER APPROACH (THIS EARNED EXTRA GREEN BREAD FOR THE ETERNALS WHO BACKED THIS)
DELIVER THESE BONUS LOAVES, BRUTAL!
YES. YES! FIRE THEM ALL. THIS “PUBLIC SECTOR” IS A GREAT HELP. WIN.
ZARDOZ MUST GO AND SEND A GRAIN DONATION TO THE WIZENED CRONE, AND THE DISHEVELED COMMUNARD STANDING FOR SUPREME LEADER OF THE LARGE NORTH AMERICAN BRUTAL STATE. THEY WILL ADVANCE THE GREAT CLEANSING!
ZARDOZ HAS SPOKEN.
AND NOW ZARDOZ CONTINUES TO GIVE ADVICE ON BEHAVIORS.
Q: Upon being asked by my daughter’s future mother-in-law for my thoughts on a bridal shower, I texted my daughter before answering. The maid of honor is my 20-year-old, so I offered to pay for the bridal party to host a shower at a local, trendy brunch spot, inviting future MIL, daughter’s stepmother, and all grandmothers.
My daughter then let me know that she and her fiance preferred to ask her stepmother and father to host it at their house instead. I let her know that I wasn’t sure how I felt about that. When it wasn’t dropped, I was impolite and stated, “I love you, but I don’t love anyone enough to sit in Daddy’s house with his parents and family.”
I have always been a good co-parent. I made sure we all sat together at every school program and graduation since elementary school. We did college move-in days together. I made sure my girls’ sister from their stepmother’s first marriage was in every picture with my girls at these occasions.
However, this seemed a boundary I needed to draw, especially since the shower was not yet planned.
She asked her stepmother, and perhaps shared my response. Her stepmother then offered to host at a restaurant instead. I explained to my daughter that there was never any issue with coming together as a family, and an alternate location in the middle would have been fine from the start.
But she and her fiance are deeply hurt and feel as though I was not willing to “suck it up” to celebrate them, and that my issues “should not fall back on them because it’s not their fault.”
I certainly wasn’t refusing to see anybody, and had not expressed a negative opinion about having to see them at the wedding.
Besides the reactive, impolite way I set my boundary, have I demonstrated poor etiquette by preferring a more neutral location? I am struck by my daughter’s reaction and reminded her that she might need to take a step back and consider how I have always carried myself, and loved and supported her. On every other matter, I have told her that it’s her wedding and to do it her way. Please advise me on my missteps and what apologies I may owe.
A: WEAKLING! NEVER APOLOGIZE. ZARDOZ HAS SEEN FAR WORSE FOR WEDDING PROBLEMS…
WHAT IN LAWS? I AM IMMORTAL! THEY WERE NOT.
THE ONLY WAY TO SALVAGE THIS IS TO APPEAR TO HAVE CRAVENLY BEGGED FORGIVENESS, GO TO THE PARTY….AND POISON ALL FOOD AND DRINK.
ONE TWITCHED! *BLAMBLAMBLAM*
ZARDOZ WILL SEND THE BRUTAL EXTERMINATORS TO FINISH OFF ANYONE STILL MOVING. THINK OF THE SAVINGS ON WEDDING GIFTS TOO!
Q: Is there an ungendered term for “hostess gift”?
A: “TRIBUTE”. YOUR INABILITY TO COME UP WITH SIMPLE WORDS INDICATES TO ZARDOZ THAT YOU ARE SUITED FOR ONLY ONE ACTIVITY. ENJOY YOUR NEW FOUND LIFE AS A GRAIN SLAVE, IN SERVICE TO THE VORTEX.
PRESENT, “FOR YOU”, “HERE, I GOT YOU A LITTLE SOMETHING” WOULD ALSO HAVE SUFFICED.
Well, as I write this (a couple of hours before it posts), I am opening Friday beer one. Also, finishing the last of my obligations to people who aren’t family for the weekend (but you guys are really close. Really). And then I have to hang curtains in the guest room my wife painted about six weeks ago and has sat un-finished until I offered to help today.
UPDATE: Scene from a curtain hanging
Her: Those curtains don’t touch the floor, we’ll have to rehang everything.
Me: But your sheet right here said 90″, and the curtains are supposed to be 95″. What are they? Dick inches?
Her: What?
Me: Never mind. What does the box say for curtain length?
Her: (looks at full box of curtains) These say 95″
Me: What does the box these curtains came out of say?
Her: Oh, 84″.
Me: I think I have a faster solution than rehanging the curtain rod…
I’m going to add Mojeaux to people who I love/hate doing links afterwards. I don’t think it’s Bowie’s cod that left me feeling inadequate.
Congratulations. We’ve made it through another week. This one, sadly, is ending with a head cold for me. But that’s what happens when winter arrives and it gets down into the high 40s. I’m sure some of you can relate to this arctic blast, so I won’t dwell on it.
The best player ever. Also pictured: President’s Cup Captain Tiger Woods.
Tiger Woods the captain has picked…Tiger Woods the player to be on his President’s Cup team. Sounds like a solid plan with the way he’s been playing lately. Although I’m a bit shocked Rickie Fowler was left off the squad.
Seminoles fans, meet your (potential) next head coach.
Vlad the Impaler was born on this day. I bet Pie is out celebrating by sucking the blood out of something. Also born on this day were/are comet-spotter Edmond Halley, author Bram Stoker (ironically), board game magnate Milton Bradley, writer Margaret Mitchell, engineer Jack Kilby, football coaching legend Bobby Bowden, NRA exec Wayne LaPierre, drag queen Chi Chi LaRue, TV’s favorite asshole Gordon Ramsay, and recipient of a bad boob job Tara Reid.
That’s not too shabby a list. Now on to…the links!
“You fucked up. you trusted us.” Somebody is gonna lose their license over this and an insurance company is gonna wish they hadn’t written that malpractice policy. Yikes!
Today was awesome for me. All my direct reports and managers were busy doing other things, so I wrote a little program to help me get around the absolutely wretched MS Flows Power Automate interface. Best described as: Everything is drag-and-drop (as long as you are doing simple things)! If you want to do grown-up things (like only start a flow if a record changes to a certain status or use the fields in that changed record without doing another lookup), here’s a whole new syntax that isn’t quite the same as other syntaxes used in Azure. After I spent 4 hours figuring it out yesterday, I just decided to write a translator from something I already understand pretty well and can easily produce. I can still code! I have skillz!
I suspect this story is wildly overblown, but I am kind of hoping that permanent Federal supervisory class finds itself engaged in a bloody war of attrition with the political class that leaves both sides substantially weakened for a couple of decades.
Bill Gates demonstrates actual “fuck you” money, tells Warren and Dem establishment to pound sand over wealth tax.
