Sunday Evening Coming Attractions

Alright so for those of you that decided today was not a day to watch football…I am not included in this. I’ll be quick.

This weeks coming attractions!

Monday:  Morning Links, Midday by Animal, Afternoon Links, and maybe an evening post.  I dunno, we’re competing with Monday Night Football.

Tuesday:  Morning Links, Midday by Tonio, Afternoon Links

Sugarfree. Now here’s a guy that…um…sorry….It’s been a while since I got a boner…

Wednesday:  Morning Links, Sugarfree’s family funhouse, Afternoon links, Evening crossword by Don Escaped Texas.

Thursday:  Now it gets murky.  I can guarantee morning and afternoon links.  You might get an SNP, or something.  You know Kindsbury.  If you didn’t play this “secret offense” bullshit and actually ran a few reps during preseason…your quarterback might not be sacked by his own right tackle?  Just throwing that out there. So SNP…I don’t control that.

Friday:  Even murkier.  You’ll get links.  You’ll get ZARDOZ, STEVE SMITH, or Winston’s Mom or something. Dangit!  Wide open!?  This is DETROIT,  you are getting owned by DETROIT.

Oh nice.  Fitz’s streak:  continues!

Comments

459 responses to “Sunday Evening Coming Attractions”

  1. I’m soliciting suggestions for more Profiles in Toxic Masculinity.

      1. DEG

        Seconded.

      2. Tonio

        Thirded.

    1. Tonio

      Also, for your long-list: Ernest Shackleton, Mungo Park, and Captain Sir Richard Francis Burton.

        1. Chipping Pioneer

          In the right light, you look like Shackleton.

    2. Merian C. Cooper.

    3. William Hope Hodgson (or John Buchan) – writers who lived the experience (other than Hemingway/HST)

    4. Crusty Juggler

      Chuck Norris, Clint Eastwood (doing all his own stunts for The Eiger Sanction wtf), Jim Bridger, Jerry Shriver, Billy Waugh, Dar Robinson, Gene LeBell.

    5. Suthenboy

      James Buchanan Eads. You will probably have to do some research but trust me, worth every minute. Men like him built this country. If you decide on him let me know, I have some info on him that may be hard to come by.

      1. dbleagle

        I second James Bridger. I also nominate Vince Lombardi, Theodore Judah, Chief Washakie and Robert T. Frederick. (William Donovan is a stud too.)

    6. Old Man With Candy

      Richard Feynman.

    7. Tundra

      Audie Murphy

      1. CPRM

        Given his story, and subsequent career playing himself and now being cynical about the world, I hope his achievements weren’t just propaganda.

        1. Derpetologist

          People who lie about their combat experience (or lack thereof) tend to get called out real quick. Too many witnesses.

          It’s pretty hard to scam your way to a Medal of Honor, not to mention the numerous other awards he got.

          When a guy gets every medal for bravery there is, that can’t be a scam.

          1. See also SGT York.

          2. Of course…outside of wartime situations (other than some of his younger years), guys like him and Desmond Doss don’t really fit the “toxic” masculinity element.

            You could look at Dan Daley, or even Mitchell Paige. Hell they modeled G.I. Joe after this guy. Tough critters.

          3. Actually had this article saved on my computer since college.

          4. Homple

            Oops, I seconded you downstream.

        2. Drake

          John Basilone was THE Man. He was even the Army Philippines boxing champ before reenlisting in the Marines.

      2. Homple

        Alvin york.

    8. Derpetologist

      Roy Chapman Andrews- he was a paleontologist who became the inspiration for Indiana Jones and other adventurous characters

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roy_Chapman_Andrews

    9. mindyourbusiness

      Calvin Coolidge.

      1. Rhywun

        If we’re doing pols… Margaret Thatcher? She had bigger balls than most of her peers.

    10. Derpetologist

      I don’t know if there are too many military suggestions already, but I’ll add another:

      Dick Bong was the highest scoring American fighter pilot of WW2. Also, his name was Dick Bong.

      He nearly got kicked out for doing a loopdy loop around the Golden Gate Bridge. His commander stood up for him at the court martial and basically said “look, the only fighter pilots who are worth a damn do stunts like that.”

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Richard_Bong

      1. pistoffnick

        There is a bridge named for him that spans between Duluth, MN and Superior, WI.

        I snicker every time the “Bong Bridge” gets mention on the radio

        1. Homple

          Also the Richard Bong State Recreation Area.

    11. Tejicano

      Definitely Sir Richard Francis Burton.

      Spoke at least 40 languages fluently. Did a Haj at a time when death was a certain outcome had he been discovered. Wrote the manual for the bayonet for the British Army. Was a renowned swordsman – took a lance through the face during an attack by Berber bandits and continued fighting. Traveled every continent (except Antarctica) in the early/mid 19th century. Translated the “Thousand and One Arabic Nights” and the “Kama Sutra” into English.

      He also documented the sexual practices of dozens of cultures throughout Asia and parts or Africa and South America – unfortunately his records were burned by his wife after his passing because Victorian England.

  2. leon

    Common Colts. What are you doing?

      1. leon

        Lol. hows your back feeling Hayek?

        1. Wouldn’t we all like to be feeling Hayek?

          1. Chipping Pioneer

            *throws penalty flag*

        2. hayeksplosives

          Getting better over all, with some flares of pain (like today).

          A couple of months to go.

          Thanks for asking.

          1. DEG

            This is good news. I hope your recovery continues going along well.

      2. Tonio

        Colts #35 (who I’m assuming is Vinatieri — So. Would.

        1. hayeksplosives

          Number 4 is Vinatieri.

          If you want a bear, may I recommend retired Colt Jeff Saturday? Dreamiest eyes known to man.

          And he’s hilarious.

          1. Tonio

            Who are these ‘bears’ of which you speak? LOL.

            They guy in the picture you linked to is pretty much my physical ideal. I don’t do sportsball.

        2. The 35 is for the anniversary of when the state of Maryland tried to take over the team by eminent domain, forcing the team to move in the middle of the night so that in the morning there wouldn’t be anything for the state to take.

          NFL kickers and punters by rule wear numbers between 1 and 19.

          1. leon

            Interesting on both counts.

          2. hayeksplosives

            I always thought the hate for the Irsays for moving the team was unfounded.

            They took their property and left before they could be robbed.

            It takes a libertarian website to find another person who sees it as defense against eminent domain.

    1. Common Colts.

      I have a soft spot for Pythons, 19th century lockwork and all, but I wouldn’t call them common.

      1. Tejicano

        How about a low SN Trooper?

      2. Nephilium

        The Pythons you say? Five new episodes of Monty Python are now available.

        1. Very cool, thanks for linking!

  3. Not an Economist

    Arizona Cardinals look like they have a decent college college offense.

    1. Not an Economist

      dammit, strike one college. I’m not drinking honest.

      1. Chafed

        Honest honest or just honest?

  4. hayeksplosives

    Most surprising outcomes in NFL so far were not who won or lost, but by some of the crazy margins!!

    Baltimore Ravens 59, Miami Dolphins 10
    Tennessee Titans 43, Cleveland Browns 13

    And worst of all, Adam Vinatieri is only 1 for 3 on field goals today!!

    1. Nephilium

      We’re trying not to talk about the Browns today.

      JFC, what the hell happened to the team. We were actually looking to see if we’d at least break a record on penalties. And they were so bad that no one was even bitching that they were bad calls. We earned all of them.

    2. leon

      Can’t Believe the colts tied it up

    3. Playa Manhattan

      Any surprising outcomes in college football?

      1. Brett L

        FSU managed a W.

    4. Vinatieri was injured during the preseason. He’s not 100% yet.

  5. Rhywun

    Huh – Bills won.

    When does hockey start?

    1. hayeksplosives

      A month til face off I believe

      1. Tundra

        October 2.

        Can’t wait!

        1. Tundra

          Of course the train wreck Wild start on the 3rd.

          1. dontreadonme

            Look forward to welcoming them to Smashville!

          1. Chafed

            Hyp wins by a mile.

          2. MikeS

            Hyp wins “link with poorest sound quality”.

            I think this is better.

  6. DEG

    Sugarfree’s family funhouse

    These euphemisms.

  7. Rebel Scum

    We have this thing in the office fantasy football league where the lowest score each week buys doughnuts for everyone. I’m well on my way to being that guy on week one. The disappointing thing is that I have a receiver (Marquise Brown) that was intended to be a backup and he ends up having a hell of a game that would have saved me had he not been benched. *sigh* Projections and draft grades mean dick and I don’t know enough to pick the right people each week.

  8. BakedPenguin

    If you didn’t play this “secret offense” bullshit and actually ran a few reps during preseason…your quarterback might not be sacked by his own right tackle?

    Um… is there something you wanna tell me, MS?

    1. mexican sharpshooter

      Yes. Preseason exists for a reason. Run your damn offense,

      1. BakedPenguin

        Oh, Kingsbury. I hadn’t seen the Cards/Lions score. Never mind.

        And I’ll get an SNP in. Possibly even on time!

        1. Tonio

          P-P-Ppppplease!

          On time? You mean there are deadlines? [notices menacing gazes from TPTB, looks at floor]

          1. mexican sharpshooter

            Hey man, *I* am not the one that enforces deadlines.

          2. BakedPenguin

            They need to know what going’s where in advance, and have a reasonable schedule laid out, so I get it.

            And for your support, Tonio, I’ll even try to include something for you (you’ll know it when/if you see it).

          3. Tonio

            I get it, too. I am the prodigal son, returning.

            Thanks. Same.

    1. Rebel Scum

      I thought that song was just from ‘The Campaign’.

      Also, one and done. #ThoseEyes

      But 4 has a milfy thing going on that I like.

      And number 8 I appreciate. #ThatSmile(…andass…)

  9. Rebel Scum

    Sugarfree’s family funhouse

    Hide ya kids, hide ya wife…

  10. Nephilium

    So, I’ve been contemplating putting together a guide to beer and food pairings. Other then the usual response of “DO IT!” Is there any interest from the people here (/waves at lurkers).

    1. Tulip

      I would be interested. I’ve taken an evening class/lecture on cocktail and food pairings and gone to beer faster, but haven’t seen a beer pairing class. I would enjoy it

      1. Nephilium

        Tulip, just for you Garrett Oliver talking about why beer is better than wine for food pairing.

        Garrett is a great speaker and beer geek (he’s the owner of Brooklyn Brewing).

        1. The problem is, it’s still beer.

          1. Spudalicious

            So I’m assuming you won’t be participating? I’m gonna let my punctuation run wild.

          2. Nephilium

            Its ok that Teds doesnt like beer. It just shows how wrong he can be on everything. I mean, someone who hates beer cant be a decent person, can they.

            /goes to take a shower after typing that.

          3. Nephilium

            Do you have a brand new key?

          4. BakedPenguin

            Neph – for a second, I thought Vince Vaughn was playing drums for that band.

          5. MikeS

            Even if it’s a cover of that song, there’s no damn way I’m clicking it.

          6. Nephilium

            MikeS: You’re not interested in a cute young blonde singing? You do you man.

          7. MikeS

            *hits mute and clicks link*

          8. MikeS

            Uffda. I do love cute female bass players.

            *unmutes*

            Agggghhh!!! DAMN, I hate that song.

          9. Nephilium

            MikeS: Blame me, because I’m awesome. And just because I read an article about how the band isn’t woke (the singer married the guitar player after high school), one of their albums Barefoot and Pregnant.

          10. MikeS

            Much better

    2. Spudalicious

      Please do. That could be a fun discussion.

    3. Pi Guy

      I actually think beer has more variety in flavor and style than wine. It makes sensible to think that the pairing options would be even wider.

      DO IT!

    4. Crusty Juggler

      DO IT

      1. Nephilium

        /looks at original post

        /looks at Crusty Juggler

        /washes out eyes

    5. I would be interested. I like trying to make myself a bit more cultured in that respect so I’d really welcome a piece on that.

    6. Chipping Pioneer

      Beer pairs with pizza and wings.

      For all others, see wine.

      There. Done.

  11. Rebel Scum

    What is the genre “horror” in film?

    Salinger Says
    @TheSalingerSays
    WARNING GAYS AND LGBTQ PEOPLE GOING TO SEE IT 2:

    THE OPENING SCENE INVOLVES THE BRUTALIZATION OF 2 GAY MEN AND THE MURDER OF ONE OF THEM.

    I FELT SICK AND IT THREW OFF MY ENTIRE MOVIE EXPERIENCE. I JUST WANT YOU TO BE AWARE.

    Salinger Says
    @TheSalingerSays
    Replying to @TheSalingerSays
    I AM NOT SAYING DONT SEE THE MOVIE. I AM SIMPLY WARNING THOSE WHO MAY BE HARMED BY IT.

    Because the movie is definitely targeting homosexual people and no one else is ever killed in a horror movie.

    1. Nephilium

      It was a pretty big deal in the book, you know, which came out over 20 years ago.

      1. Rhywun

        I wasn’t aware of It I a couple years and now there’s II.

        Am I correct in understanding that it’s still the same story, they just put the kid stuff in I and the adult stuff in II?

        1. Rebel Scum

          Whatever is in the book that IT is based on, split in to two parts.

          1. Pretty much the same format as the original tv miniseries starring Tim Curry.

          2. Nephilium

            Except with some of the kid stuff being in It II, and some of my favorite scenes being cut from It I.

            But basically, Rhywun, you’ve got it. The issue was that WB/New Line wasn’t sure if It would be successful, so they only greenlit the first movie. After it was really good, they finally approved the second. The problem is that they were using child actors, who age quickly (as they’re children). I’m still hoping to catch chapter II in the theater, if not I’ll rent it. But from what I’ve heard, It chapter II starts with It killing off a gay man to start the new era of sacrifice (which happened in the book), and people were complaining about how it was just being homophobic.

          3. Rhywun

            IIRC the sexuality of that victim was incidental to the plot, except maybe as being used by It as a means to stir up maximum shit. And yes, that is how the book started. It is not “homophobic” – gay people do, in fact, sometimes get killed same as anyone else. Treating them as untouchable martyrs would be more disrespectful IMHO.

            TL;DR – these people complaining about it are out of their minds.

          4. Nephilium

            Right there with you Rhywun. The fact that there were articles about the trailer (which featured the balloons under the bridge), just got irritating. Hell, the book talked about how the locals all thought it was also a Nazi sex bar that the guy was going to.

          5. Rhywun

            But IIRC the book, the past and present are intertwined. Splitting them out into separate movies seems like a bad decision that GRRM would pull.

        2. leon

          Il is actually about Musolini

        3. It is over 90 years old. And Clara His is quite charming in it.

        4. Crusty Juggler

          There is no orgy scene in either film.

          Sad, I know.

      1. leon

        It’s Misogony all the way down. They are mad cause she said something nice about the character she was tapped to play. Who? Oh Margret Thatcher, and we can’t like that woman.

        1. She was definitely a strong woman, but because she wasn’t a lefty she’s absolutely despised.

          1. leon

            Which being fair isn’t actually misogyny.in my book, you’re free to disagree with any politician on their politics without being a misogynist. But that’s not the rules they set.

    2. Tulip

      Eh, they specifically say, they aren’t telling people to avoid it. I once told my book club I didn’t want to read anymore books that featured women being raped and abused. That’s not that different.

      1. leon

        I don’t know much about It, so if he’s targeting Gay people that’s one thing. But you go to a horror movie, people are (most likely) going to die.

        1. Tulip

          Yes, I was more specific. A mystery where a woman was raped and murdered and that’s just noted, ok. A serial killer book where the rape and murder is “lovingly” described (all about how the killer gets off on it), not okay. So even though it’s a horror movie, which I haven’t seen, I can see the poster’s point. Depends on how it’s presented. So I’m not going to condemn the poster, who is only issuing a warning. A narcissistic warning, but that’s what that media is – narcissism writ large.

          1. leon

            True,I don’t think the poster is being malicious. He’s giving a warning that he thinks some people might want. What’s strange to me is that you’d go to a movie and be okay with murder, but when it’s murder of a member of group X it’s too much.

          2. Nephilium

            The rules of slasher films are pretty well established. Unless you’re the young single white girl (virgin only), odds are you’re going to die. There are a couple of horror films that play with it (like Zombeavers), but for the most part, the rules exist and you should be aware going in.

          3. Crusty Juggler

            How to Mix a DIY Spiked Seltzer That’s Better Than White Claw

            Ain’t nothing better than tha Claw, but in times of need we do have to go on.

          4. Hyperion

            But, but… the Claw, I can hang out with all my hipster douchebag friends. #NeckBeardsIsPeople2

          5. Crusty Juggler

            It’s not a hipster product for hipsters, hipster.

          6. Nephilium

            /drops the pint glass

            /punches Crusty Juggler in the throat.

          7. Crusty Juggler

            Fun fact: tha Claw does not cause violence.

          8. Spudalicious

            Just extreme boredom.

            You know how you make something better than the Claw? You put vodka in a copper mug filled with ice, add the juice of half a lime and top off with Q ginger beer.

          9. MikeS

            Spud gets it. Swap lime juice for rhubarb juice and BAM!

  12. Asking again – anyone have a suggestion for an affordable pelican-type lockable hard case that can hold an AR-type rifle and a shotgun (and preferably a handgun too). Need something decent for storage/transportation.

    1. Sean

      Sorry. I don’t really do the pelican style stuff. I have just one rifle sized hard case that was a gift. It’s functional, but I don’t abuse it. It really holds just one rifle with a scope.

      https://smile.amazon.com/Plano-Single-Scoped-Double-Non-Scoped/dp/B000P431BG

      The rest of my cases are all nylon padded stuff. *shrug*

    2. Tonio

      Affordable and lockable usually define opposite ends of the spectrum for this sort of thing. Plastic cases, while technically lockable, are… plastic and therefore easily cut, melted, gnawed, etc. If you want “lockable” to conform to some sort of government transport rules pretty much anything with a polypropylene case with foam cube padding will do.

      My application is whitewater kayaking. I want whatever I put in my case to be dry and functional after a day in the hold or strapped to the deck through multiple Class I-III descents. Pelican does it for me and the other photogs/videogs, but lockability isn’t a concern for us.

    3. Tonio

      Also, military surplus stores. Hull Street Outlet (actually on Jeff Davis Hwy, aka US Route 1, “the ‘pike”) next time you’re in Richmond. Take me with you. It’s in the part of Richmond that Tom Robbins and Vince Gilligan write about.

      1. Tonio

        Or Glib meetup with Scruffy Nerfherder and Chipwooder. LOL

      2. Appreciate the tips. Basically if I’m sticking with 3 guns for the immediate timeframe (AR – which obviously could be broken down, Mossberg M500 (not break-downable?), and pistol) – and until I get my CCH, I need to keep them in the trunk/back of my RAV 4 if being transported – or back there no matter what for the long guns. Would prefer something semi secure, but I do have lockable footlockers, etc – just a little larger/bulkier than I need for the moment. When I get to my next place next year, I expect to buy a “small” gun safe (with room to grow) – but again, a semisecure option for regular storage would be handy too….or pull out the footlocker.

    4. Gustave Lytton

      Whatever you get, don’t have some cheap flexible case with duct tape around to prevent access.

    5. Tejicano

      Does the shotgun break down or have a folding stock? In other words, do you have an option for a shorter case? That would allow more options which don’t look like a gun.

      I prefer that sort of case just to avoid the telegraphing which an obvious gun case broadcasts.

    6. Gustave Lytton

      Kind of curious myself. This is what I would get, but no personal experience with it. The only review pretty much meets your need. Photos on Pelican’s site show how it can be set up with two long guns.

      https://www.amazon.com/Pelican-Air-1745-Long-Case/dp/B07P97L9CM

      1. Looks like some third party ones in the recommended similar ones on that page – I’ll dig around. Thanks.

    7. Plinker762

      Look at the Apache cases at Harbor Freight. I have one of themid sized ones attached to my snowmobile and it had held up well and is water proof

  13. Rebel Scum

    Oh, Tulsi…

    “Congress is coming back this week and the House Judiciary Committee is planning on voting on an expanded impeachment inquiry. Do you support this?” Host Greta Van Susteren asked during the premier episode of her new show “Full Court Press.”

    “I don’t,” Gabbard replied. “You know, I think it’s important for us to think about what is in the best interest of the country and the American people, and continuing to pursue impeachment is something that I think will only further…tear our country apart.”

    “Make no bones about it: We need to defeat Donald Trump,” she continued. “But, I think it’s important for our country’s sake and our future that the voters in this country are the ones who do that, and I believe we will.”

    Gabbard now stands in the minority as more than half of the Democrats in the U.S. House of Representatives are formally backing the opening of an impeachment inquiry into the president. One Republican, Rep. Justin Amash (R-MI) has also called to advance impeachment proceedings.

    Someone ship this woman a copy of ‘The Law’ and the ‘Federalist Papers’. It might improve her, philosophically speaking. (I really want to like her, but her leftist domestic policy philosophy loses me)

    1. leon

      I thought the libertarian position was to accept the Deep State Line, full throated, And insist on impeachment for obstruction of Justice.

    2. Tulip

      I disagree with the almost all her positions, but I don’t see the problem with this quote. What am I missing?

      1. leon

        I think he was saying he agreed with her, and just wished she could get her Domestic Policy in line.

      2. Rebel Scum

        Nothing is wrong with this quote. She is right to oppose impeachment on the grounds of “orange man bad”. I was commenting on her other aspects as a pol.

        1. Tulip

          Ah, got it.

    3. Hyperion

      “I don’t,” Gabbard replied. “You know, I think it’s important for us to think about what is in the best interest of the country and the American people, and continuing to pursue impeachment is something that I think will only further…tear our country apart.”

      Well, you’re out as a democrat, honey. Not only do you have to support tearing the country apart, but you have to dive in head first for every commie bullshit the left can dream up. No wonder she was out so quickly.

      1. Anti-forever wars and doesn’t toe the impeachment line. Yeah…it was nice knowing Tulsi.

          1. I like the way you think right there, Mistah. You got me sold.

        1. Count Potato

          Although, imho, she had the best chance of beating Trump.

          1. Hyperion

            They aren’t serious about winning an election. They’re too busy conditioning the public to become helpless sheep so they can become royalty. Then they can get rid of that pesky election stuff. China got it right, why can’t we get it right?

    4. Suthenboy

      “I think it’s important for us to think about what is in the best interest of the country and the American people…”

      Turns out this chick is a comedian as well as a pol. Whodaguessed?

      Listen up Tulsi. The last thing on the minds of the people pursuing Trump’s impeachment is the interest of the American people. They are out to protect their own personal interests first and those of the ruling class second. They don’t give a flying fuck about the American people outside of their schemes to enslave them.

    5. Chipping Pioneer

      That should be a debate question:

      Have you read The Federalist Papers?

      1. or ‘The Constitution’ or ‘On Liberty’ or ‘The Wealth of Nations’, hell I’m give ’em credit for ‘Hop on Pop’ or anything other than polls and tweets.

      2. CPRM

        The federalists were stateist trash. Anti-Federalist Papers FTW!

  14. Rhywun

    US Open men’s final is getting interesting in case anyone is tired of football.

    1. Rebel Scum

      I default to college women’s volleyball and/or soccer when done watching football.

    2. Chafed

      Uh no

  15. Spudalicious

    NY Giants. Wrecked.

    1. Hyperion

      I mean not like Miami got wrecked. 59-10? They playing college football now in Florida?

      1. Spudalicious

        35-17. 4th quarter was pretty much a preseason game with the backups, so 35-10.

        Giants owned the first series, Dallas offense pretty much owned the rest of the game.

    2. Rebel Scum

      But I didn’t get enough points from the Dallas defense.

      1. Spudalicious

        Not their best.

    3. Count Potato

      It’s going to be a long season, but at least I have the satisfaction of knowing I’m not a Cowboys fan.

      1. Spudalicious

        It’s the Dallas “Broncos”.

  16. Tulip

    Today is so nice my dog voluntarily went outside other than for a walk or bedtime per. She hates (HATES) going outside for anything besides a walk when it’s hot. No matter what the calendar says, today is officially fall.

    1. Hyperion

      Animals are weird. I had a big orange tabby cat who would insist on going outside if we were getting a big snow. He’d stand at the patio doors and meow until I would open the door and then pounce into the deepest show he could find. An hour or two later he’d come back to the patio doors meowing to get back in covered in snow looking like the abominable snow cat.

      1. Tulip

        My dog, from a Florida track, hates heat and humidity, and loves the snow. As long as her butt doesn’t touch snow when she squats to pee. Every year, she squats, puts her butt in snow and rockets upwards. It’s hilarious. If I were a good, kind, dog owner, I wouldn’t let it happen. I’m evil and I laugh.

        1. Hyperion

          I had an Aussie that mostly loved to stay indoors, but he had way too much explosive energy for it. We had a fence around the yard between us and our landlord’s farm and by 12 weeks old he knew to go across that fence before taking a crap. Smartest dog I have ever seen. I couldn’t go anywhere without him driving or he would pout for days, seriously. He also used to herd my Landlord’s cattle and according to the guy, kill his chickens for fun and then disappear. I remember him saying ‘That silver and black devil of yours! I’m going to shoot him the next time I see him!’. But I would leave the house and go wherever and he’d be right on my doorstep where he was then I left.

        2. whiz

          I was nice to our old bulldog and went out to shovel the grass so he wouldn’t bottom out in the snow when peeing.

      2. Sean

        Adorable.

    2. Rebel Scum

      My cat got out while I was securing the grill. He often tries to get outside and even spent the day outside in the rain once when he got out (gf’s fault…). Knowing his tendencies I deliberately took him out on the deck last year when we got a good December snowstorm. Like he didn’t like the rain when he spent the day on the front porch as it rained all day he did not like standing in a foot of snow.

      1. Tulip

        I have always encouraged my cat to go outside when it’s raining. He doesn’t like going outside.

        1. Hyperion

          You can count on your cat to do exactly the opposite of what you want it to do. /cats are the best libertarians

          1. Rebel Scum

            the best libertarians

            Except they definitely know who is their bread an butter, and are totally reliant on me.

          2. Gender Traitor

            Or do they consider us their “orphans”?

  17. hayeksplosives

    Can the NFL give a lifetime achievement Super Bowl ring to Larry Fitzgerald.

    1. Spudalicious

      I like that guy. Class act.

    2. Hyperion

      They should give it to him just because he’s going to spend the rest of his career watching the smurf tackled in the end zone.

    3. hayeksplosives

      Woooooooo!!! He just did it again.

      TD. Need a 2 pt conversion.

      1. hayeksplosives

        They got it!! Tied up with 43 seconds to go.

    4. mexican sharpshooter

      I can’t believe they gave him that flag.

  18. mexican sharpshooter

    You know what? I don’t care if they lose. This just got so much better.

  19. Crusty Juggler

    Michael Mann’s novel based on ‘Heat’ will be released next year

    the planned novel would be a prequel, covering “the formative years of homicide detective Vincent Hanna (Al Pacino), Neil McCauley (Robert De Niro), Chris Shiherlis (Val Kilmer), McCauley’s accomplice Nate (Jon Voight), and other characters … in the 1995 film.”

    Squeeeee!

    1. Playa Manhattan

      Will the novel sound awesome with 5.1 sound?

      1. Nephilium

        More importantly, will it have a scene between De Niro and Pacino?

  20. Crusty Juggler

    Justin Amash
    @justinamash
    We’ve been at war in Afghanistan for 18 years—the longest war in U.S. history. Nearly three of those years have been under President Trump. If he wanted to bring our troops home, he could. He doesn’t want to. It’s that simple. The rest is just political theater.

    Will Amash shame Trump into ending a war?

    1. Did he try to shame Obama into ending it?

      1. Heroic Mulatto
        1. leon

          Not that Obama could be shamed into stopping the wars.

    2. hayeksplosives

      Oy vey. That could backfire. Trump doesn’t typically back down, he doubles down.

      1. Tonio

        ^This.

    3. Rhywun

      I hope the FBI doesn’t cover up the next terrorism plot that the Taliban will allow to be cooked up in their borders.

      1. BakedPenguin

        Or the Saudis funding and directing it…

    4. Suthenboy

      ” If he wanted to bring our troops home, he could. He doesn’t want to. It’s that simple.”

      It isn’t that simple.

      Until someone explains why we are there I am going to keep going with corrupt contractors using the rebuilding effort to funnel money into their companies pockets. I don’t think Trump has a hand in that but all of those around him do. Lets see a list of contractors, owners of those companies and dollar amounts.

  21. Crusty Juggler

    Samantha Jane Geimer
    @sjgeimer

    For all those who insult, degrade and use me, who tweet about my statutory rape as if it is porn, excited to use vulgar words, excited by your hatred. Congratulations to
    Roman. I am sorry for us both that the level of self serving corruption in the LA Courts seems never ending

    Believe and listen to all victims unless you want to ignore a victim to feel morally superior.

    1. How are you supposed to know whether they’re a victim without investigating?

    2. Playa Manhattan

      You can pay anyone to say anything, and this is no different.

      It’s still in the public interest to prevent predators from ass raping 13 year olds.

    3. I’ll listen but I’ll have to verify before I BELIEVE.

  22. Rebel Scum

    TYT Smears Andy Ngo

    I still have a thing for Ana Kasparian.

    1. Rhywun

      I don’t know what ‘TYT’ is but man, a lot of outfits really seem to hate them some Andy Ngo.

      1. LJW

        The Young Turks.

        1. Rebel Scum

          Didn’t that organization genocide a bunch of people? Someone should tell Cenk. . . and Ana . . .

          1. DEG

            Yep.

            For a long time Cenk denied the Armenian Genocide happened. I remember reading somewhere that he has since changed his mind on it.

          2. Rebel Scum

            He just doesn’t want to talk about it. And Ana is Armenian….

          3. Tonio

            Which makes it totally okay, of course…

          4. Gustave Lytton

            Actually changed his mind, or just mouthing the words?

          5. Gustave Lytton

            Speaking the those jokers, fuck TCM for hiring and keeping Mankiewicz front and center. He isn’t fit to lick Robert Osborne heals.

          6. MikeS

            +10000

            He’s a smug prick.

          7. RAHeinlein

            Makiewicz is at-least film literate – unlike the new hires.

          8. CPRM

            Yeah, when I noticed TCM still ran Mankiewicz after his spoutings on TYT, I was confused. Then I remembered TCM has been sucking Alec Baldwin’s dick for 25 years.

          9. MikeS

            And even some one like Eddie Muller, who -at least as far as I know- doesn’t spout his politics in public, still can’t go an episode of his show without mentioning how someone’s career got “ruined” by McCarthyism.

          10. DEG

            Who knows?

          11. Gustave Lytton

            Eddie Muller needs to STFU. That guy just blathers to hear his own voice. On and on and on. Especially with that fake tuff guy shtick.

        2. Rhywun

          Yeah, I remembered as soon as I posted. I’m not up on any of that crap – just what gets reported here.

    2. Akira

      I still have a thing for Ana Kasparian.

      Yea, I’d fuck her in a “dishonoring the enemy” kind of way.

      1. Sir Digby

        I still have a thing for Ana Kasparian.

        I figured the “thing” in question would be a bag. Or, two.

  23. Well, A for effort. The week sorta kinda looks like that. But with more stuff and some stuff on different days than advertised above.

    But hey, I was too busy watching this exciting AZ game to bother writing a post. So, I guess you’ll be surprised!

    1. hayeksplosives

      I am glued to that game right now!!

    2. Nephilium

      We switched over to the Indians/Twins game during the fourth quarter of the Browns… debacle? Is that the correct word? It sure as shite wasn’t a game.

  24. CPRM

    Gall darn it! So turns out my video driver problem and HDMI not being recognized are completely unrelated, bad HDMI cable just happened to crap out the same time I was having a driver issue. Figured this out after 2 days of futzing with the driver. Got that straightened out, and now my main display is super dim. Fuck sake.

    1. Hyperion

      HDMI? Wut? You mean DisplayPort, right? Or are you watching Brady Bunch reruns on that thing?

      1. CPRM

        HDMI goes to the TV. That’s what connection it has.

    2. Count Potato

      HDMI either works or it doesn’t. If it works poorly, it’s not an HDMI problem.

      1. Nephilium

        If you have static, the problem isn’t on the digital side of the equipment.

        1. Count Potato

          It’s digital on both sides.

          1. Nephilium

            First step of VOIP troubleshooting is finding out what the caller means by “static”. Static is distinctive, and different then cut outs, drops, one way audio, or other issue.

      2. CPRM

        The HDMI cable to the TV just happened to crap out the same night I had driver issues going on; one of those ‘bad luck’ failures that leads to faulty diagnostics; like having a heart attack the first time you eat bacon and the coroner blames it on the bacon.

        Still don’t know what the issue is causing my main display to be less luminous than the secondary monitor at the moment, but I’m done fucking with drivers for the day.

  25. Rebel Scum

    I watched the latest Dave Chappelle special with the leftist, dyed-in-the-wool Democrat gf. She loved it (as did I…). This is anecdotal evidence that 1) the average Democrat/leftist still has a sense of humor and 2) elitist leftist are definitely controlling the messaging and therefor controlling gullible people. *But* there are gaps in their control, those gaps being human nature oriented.

    1. CPRM

      I chuckled once or twice, I think he passed his sell by date before he sojourned to Africa. But I ain’t gonna piss on anyone else’s corn flakes.

      1. Cacciatore

        Urine might actually improve corn flakes. At least it has *some* flavor.

        1. Rebel Scum

          As long as your pineapple consumption is adequate.

    2. Count Potato

      I watched it. I thought it was good, but not great.

      1. Hyperion

        Same here. It was like ‘I just said some stuff that the speech police might not like, but I said niggah a lot’.

    3. Rhywun

      Yeah, I have friends who are the same way. They are unified in their hatred of Orange but not all of them swallow the entire platform of craziness.

      1. Hyperion

        I only have a couple of lefty friends/coworkers, and I try my best to refrain from politics. But when they can’t resist, they seem to be good sports about it when I say stuff that would send the lefty twitters into heart attack territory. I mean what I’m saying is that they are signalers, because signaling is easy, but they aren’t about to give up their cushy lifestyle and all their stuff and social life for some insane commie dream.

    4. Crusty Juggler

      elitist leftist are definitely controlling the messaging and therefor controlling gullible people

      They are trying to control the message and failing (and like with the rotten tomatoes failing embarrassing fashion), and I guess they influence gullible people, but that message is failing as well.

      1. Cacciatore

        +1 Silent Majority

    5. Crusty Juggler

      elitist leftist are definitely controlling the messaging and therefor controlling gullible people.

      Dave Chappelle’s New Stand-Up Special Is Hilarious (And Even Subversively Pro-Life)

      Speaking of trying to control the message and control gullible people…

      ONE OF US! ONE OF US!

      1. Tres Cool

        Yeah….it’s PRO-life when he says “you can kill it, and I can abandon the motherfucker. My money- MY choice”.

        I see where they get that

  26. Rebel Scum

    I have a NE runningback, and a Pitt runningback remaining. so I guess I’ll see how this turns out.

  27. straffinrun

    Got smacked with a direct hit from a typhoon last night. Company called and said to take the day off, so Tuesday is the new Monday. Watching Tulsi live on Rubin. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5gy797D3cAY

    1. CPRM

      Tulsi…Rubin

      *Imagines a saurkraut and 1,000 island women’s wrestling match*

      1. Count Potato

        So you are saying you want to be the meat in a Tulsi Gabbard Dave Rubin sandwich?

        1. Rebel Scum

          I’d rather have a Tulsi skewer.

          1. Spudalicious

            I’d rather skewer Tulsi.

          2. Playa Manhattan

            Wobbly H.

            No deal if there’s eye contact.

    2. Tejicano

      Good to hear you got through OK.

      It was windy and mostly too loud to sleep on my end of town. Morning traffic is backed up like The Day After but I’m taking the train after the rush dies down so issues to me personally.

      I can’t wait for this muggy, “steam blanket” weather to blow through so we can get on with Autumn.

      1. straffinrun

        My aircon tower on the balcony got blown over and the storage room door got bent pretty badly. Other than that, no big problems. Finally got the tracks clean, eh?

        1. Heroic Mulatto

          Aren’t you glad that Japan is the only place in the world with 4 distinct seasons?

          I have been assured by many that the 4 distinct seasons here in New England aren’t actually seasons.

          Because wabi sabi mono no aware or some shit.

          1. Count Potato

            Vivaldi was into cat girls.

          2. straffinrun

            They love their children more than we do, too.

          3. Tejicano

            Yeah. Four seasons.

            Autumn comes in early/mid November. Of course I have locals tell me that Autumn starts back in September because somewhere way up north in the hinterlands the colors are changing. They’re lucky I am patient with their defective mental condition and don’t slap the bejezuz out of them because my sweat glands are telling me the season hasn’t turned yet.

            Then we have a few months of wanna-be-winter when it’s too cold for a t-shirt but overall pretty nice. It might get down to the mid-teens (F) some nights.

            Then, watch for it… wait, ..wait… Spring. OK, done. Some years we get a week or so (this year it was 3 days) of nice weather before it’s no longer cold but not yet a preview to Hell.

            And then there’s Hell. At least if you work for a living and have to wear a suit and tie. And even if you can go “Cool Biz” and run around in slacks with a short sleeve, button-up shirt it sux. Count on that to start in May and roast you until some time in October.

            Four seasons my ass.

          4. Sensei

            Glad you are well as well!

            I just got done speaking with my friend in Kansai and she said it is hot at the blazes there.

            In the close to a decade I’ve known her I think the most snow she has ever mentioned has been something like an inch or so for no more than a day.

    3. Timeloose

      Glad you and yours are ok.

      1. straffinrun

        Tokyo handles direct hits pretty well. You get the mudslides and flooding elsewhere. Thanks, though.

    4. Glad to hear you and the family are all right, take care and enjoy your vacation.

    5. Gustave Lytton

      Looks pretty heavy from about 2-5am

      https://youtu.be/q5U4AEiLt5U

      Glad you guys and families are ok.

      1. straffinrun

        Ha. If you watch close enough, you’ll see me crossing there on Wednesdays and Saturdays.

    6. Sensei

      Glad you are well and seem to have power!

    1. Hyperion

      Oh, be nice. They only want to kill 6-7 billion people to save the planet. Of course none of those people will be them, because they don’t think wrong thoughts, so it’s all good.

    1. Cacciatore

      The only alt-lite figures that project seems to be missing are Milo Yiannopoulos and Glenn Beck.

  28. Count Potato

    “i finally made my love song to the @DNC public. for all the fellow Mad Libs™️ out there.”

    https://twitter.com/shoe0nhead/status/1170558714132217856

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J1W9SPPEbwM

    1. Count Potato

      “‘World Ends

      Women Most Affected’”

      https://twitter.com/shoe0nhead/status/1170357584781594626

    2. CPRM

      I’m still confused by people who identify as liberal, in the 90s way, and don’t think Republicans represent them. Trump’s GOP is Bill Clinton’s 3rd term.

    3. Heroic Mulatto

      Ok. But fuck Andrew Yang.

      1. MikeS

        Does he swing that way?

        1. Heroic Mulatto

          He cried on national tv.

          1. MikeS

            Oh wow. Yeah. Gay.

      2. CPRM

        He identifies as Andy, STOP OTHERING PEOPLE YOU FUCKING WHITE SUPREMECIST!11!!!

  29. Cacciatore

    Tomorrow I storm back into class; intellectually unarmed, and far behind on my reading. Hurricane Douchian nixed a whole week of school for me (I have only Monday/Wednesday classes, canceled) and I spent the week putting up/taking down shutters at my church and for friends who don’t know which end of a screwdriver to hold. I’ve packed a hearty lunch and am prepared to take notes on whatever marxist propaganda my professors would like parroted back to them in my next paper. I used to try to dissent- and all it did was cost a lot of extra effort and lose me (on average) about ten points. Now I do minimal effort writing, shorter papers, less citations, and earn better grades. I’ve got this college thing figured out. Viva la revolucion!

    1. RAHeinlein

      Major?

      1. Cacciatore

        Business, Project Management concentration. Next stop: law school. If I decide to skip law school or wait a while I’ll hopefully get out of the field and into the office in my current industry.

  30. Tres Cool

    Cincy -1 v. Seattle @ home ?

    For week #1, Ill take it

    1. Cacciatore

      SPORTSBALL! WOO!

        1. Rhywun

          How ’bout them Pies?

          1. Raven Nation

            Impressive. And the Lions got smoked too.

          2. Rhywun

            Yeah, that’s the kind of tanking I usually associate with Collingwood….

    2. Cacciatore

      Fuck Seattle and their over-hyped sportsball team.

    3. Nephilium

      Considering most of my coworkers are from Memphis, tomorrow is going to be terrible at work.

      At least the Indians beat the Twins.

      /waves at MikeS

      1. MikeS

        I was waiting for that.

        And, I deserve it.

        And, the Twins magic number is 14.

    1. Heroic Mulatto

      You’ve never done it cop style?

    2. Spudalicious

      Ummm…..

    1. Pope Jimbo

      Uffda. It is like you are trying to keep us on bidding on this: https://twitter.com/UnbalancedMemes/status/1169306833703645191

    2. Chafed

      Meth is a harsh mistress.

      1. Sir Digby

        An oft overlooked Heinlein novel.

        I call it novel; it’s really more of a brochure–a ‘novelette’, if you will.

  31. Crusty Juggler

    It’s Official: TOOL’s Fear Inoculum Debuts At #1 On Billboard 200, Beats Out TAYLOR SWIFT

    Take that, Queen! You and your kind fight out it out on the internets like a bunch of sissy loser babies, while my kind spends money and parties in the streets.

    On September 4, we reported that Tool’s first new album in 13 years Fear Inoculum was on track to beat Taylor Swift’s new album Lover for the #1 spot on the Billboard 200 chart. Tool frontman Maynard James Keenan shared a meme about the feat yesterday, lending credence to the possibility that it might actually happen. Now, probably unsurprisingly, it has happened.

    AND WE MEME! WE MEME BETTER TOO! US > YOU! NO TAYLOR AND NO CLAW ! HA! HA!

    1. Rhywun

      All that progging and she got stuck with #2? SMDH.

      1. CPRM

        #2 to a band of old white men who cater to old white men. It’s teh patriarchy once again.

        1. Meh, Tool is not good, gun to head – I’d rather watch T Swiffy gyrate to her bad music than pretend to dig shitty post grunge drone-a-thon jams. At least shes easy on the eyes.

          1. MikeS

            I’m with Hyp on his one. I think I’d actually rather listen to Geddy than Maynard.

          2. Sir Digby

            ::secret hi-5 to MikeS::

    2. Rhywun

      Meh, they’ll be forgotten in a week and then T-Swizzle will dominate for a month or two.

    1. Chafed

      Clearly.

    2. BakedPenguin

      MWAHAHAHAHA!!!11!!!1!

  32. Gustave Lytton

    Went to throw the chicken on the grill tonight. Partially frozen chicken at store yesterday turned into fully frozen in the fridge today. Yay.

    1. CPRM

      Chicken is only good when served rare. *runs to the bathroom to shit and vomit at the same time for the 50th time today*

      1. Sir Digby

        Golden Corral, huh?

  33. Nephilium

    So… Cleveland started poorly. The man who fell tried to argue with the EMS group that tried to take him to the hospital.

    1. Gender Traitor

      The ol’ “I’m not so think as you drunk I am” protest?

      1. Nephilium

        He at least had some awareness, as he eventually allowed himself to be taken away. The random tweet from someone (claiming to be related to the injured person) saying not to mock the fallen man is entertaining to me.

        1. Playa Manhattan

          How does one managed to get that hammered before sunrise?

          1. Heroic Mulatto

            Not all heroes wear capes.

          2. MikeS

            The cause for the man falling is not yet known, although 19 News has been told the man has a medical condition.

          3. Playa Manhattan

            No liver?

          4. MikeS

            Lost his big toes passed out while drunken tailgating last December.

    2. Playa Manhattan

      Oh my,

      The newscaster starts with “good morning”

  34. Old Man With Candy

    “Not bad for a running back.”

    1. CPRM

      running back? What the fuck is that? *Packer fan for the last decade*

      1. dontreadonme

        Can we get Ahman Green to suit back up, please?

  35. Derpetologist

    Heh. Team Blue guy says Google had their thumb on the scale in 2016.

    https://www.foxnews.com/media/google-bias-search-results-trump-clinton-epstein-levin

    Trump: Wow, Report Just Out! Google manipulated from 2.6 million to 16 million votes for Hillary Clinton in 2016 Election! This was put out by a Clinton supporter, not a Trump Supporter! Google should be sued. My victory was even bigger than thought! @JudicialWatch

    Clinton: The debunked study you’re referring to was based on 21 undecided voters. For context that’s about half the number of people associated with your campaign who have been indicted.

    Clinton calling another pol corrupt and dishonest?!

    [hysterical Cartman laughter]

    1. Not an Economist

      You could have added:

      Study Author: No Trump is right. And I was a strong Clinton supporter.

    2. like her or not that’s some pretty good snark right there.

      1. Rhywun

        Apparently that unindicted criminal didn’t get the memo about taking the “high road”.

        1. There is no longer a ‘high road’, feed the base, own the Libs, punch a Nazi, It’s all theater now. (It probably always was, but once upon a time there were better actors)

  36. Tres Cool

    Wait…..it’s Tuesday? The slant sconnie has me puzzled.

    1. CPRM

      slant sconnie

      Way to be racist against chinks japs white folk.

    2. Count Potato

      WTF is a slant sconnie?

      1. Tres Cool

        You should see their cheese.

  37. Rhywun

    The group got a boost when Johnson, who is admittedly currently using a Juul in a bid to beat a decade-old smoking habit, became the latest pol to back Levine’s anti-vaping legislation.

    In case you had any lingering doubts that pols are lying sacks of fucking shit.

    There’s tons more FUD and the usual conflating of “tobacco” with, you know, “not tobacco”, but I’m too angry to finish the piece.

    1. Count Potato

      “The City Council bills would “have an enormous impact on the effort to reduce the number of people who die from tobacco use, tackle the youth e-cigarette epidemic, significantly reduce the number of young people who become addicted, and dramatically reduce the death toll of tobacco on New York City’s African-American population.””

      BULLSHIT

      1. Gustave Lytton

        dramatically reduce the death toll of tobacco on New York City’s African-American population

        Never give up that patronizing racist condescension.

    2. Count Potato

      “One ad features a photo of bubble gum with the caption, “Addiction now in bubble gum flavor.” The Internet ad includes a link to click for users to “tell the City Council to protect kids and restrict tobacco flavors.””

      I’ve never even seen bubble gum flavored juice. Not that I’m saying it doesn’t exist.

      Anyway, this whole idea some flavors are more dangerous than others is ridiculous.

      1. Akira

        I’ve never even seen bubble gum flavored juice. Not that I’m saying it doesn’t exist.

        I actually make fun of my friend because he sometimes buys these ridiculously specific vape juice flavors like “Belgian Waffles with Butter and Syrup” and “Chocolate Cake with Vanilla Ice Cream”.

      2. MikeS

        The entire premise is faulty, and yet they keep getting away with it; only children like sweet, flavored products. Therefor, flavored tobacco and vape products must be banned.

        As Ben and Jerry’s or Starbucks or Jelly Belly or Baskin Robbins can attest to, adults like sweet flavors every bit as much as kids.

        1. Rhywun

          Well, children and black people.

          1. MikeS

            Same thing.

            /average progressive

          2. I thought blacks preferred menthol.

    3. Count Potato

      ““Strong and serious actions need to be taken around certain flavored products, which is why we already stopped selling our non-tobacco/non-menthol based JUULpods to traditional retail stores and are aggressively fighting against counterfeit and compatible flavored products which can appeal to youth and can be made with unknown ingredients, under unknown quality and manufacturing standards,” a Juul spokesman said in a statement.”

      WTF??

      1. Rhywun

        Juul is just trying to stay in their good graces.

        I hate to tell them it ain’t gonna work.

      2. MikeS

        and are aggressively fighting against counterfeit and compatible flavored products

        Efforts to quash competition framed as trying to protect children. Well played, Juul. Well played.

  38. Spudalicious

    Do the Steelers know the season has started?

    1. creech

      Someone finally told the Eagles at half time.

    2. Chafed

      Doesn’t look like it.

  39. Gustave Lytton

    But people in Oregon and around the nation with direct experience in youth mental health cite three high-level drivers behind the rise in young people hit by depression, anxiety and other mental health challenges: increased academic pressure, the rise of social media and existential fears stemming from school shootings, climate change and other horrors that have colored their childhoods.

    Or, in simpler terms: “Kids are dealing with a hell of a lot more than when we were little,”

    Nuclear war.
    Draft.

    “a hell of a lot more than when we were little”

    Bull. Shit.

    https://www.oregonlive.com/health/2019/09/in-oregon-academic-pressures-existential-fears-help-explain-rising-rates-of-suicide-mental-health-conditions.html

    1. Derpetologist

      [puts on Bill Maher hat]

      New Rule: anyone who can’t put up with 5 minutes of Full Metal Jacket style verbal abuse gets sent to chop firewood in Alaska for 6 months.

      There you precious candy-asses. For the love of god, harden the fuck up!

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=unkIVvjZc9Y

      1. Gustave Lytton

        anyone who can’t put up with 5 minutes of Full Metal Jacket style verbal abuse

        Depends if they’re sobbing or laughing uncontrollably. I swear D.S. School teaches them to be comedians.

        1. Derpetologist

          “sobbing or laughing uncontrollably”

          I’ve seen both come from DS action.

          Counselor Troi would make a great DS.

    2. MikeS

      So, Climate Change™ is a “horror” now.

      Calgon SMOD, take me away!

      1. Plinker762

        You won’t be so flippant when the sky catches on fire!

    3. creech

      And “when we were little” it was far harder to get into college before the rise of Community Colleges, and, as you said, the Draft was there if you didn’t. And the trauma of not being able to see an real time photo of what your pal was having for lunch or gf was trying on at the clothing store.

      1. Derpetologist

        internet meme

        Bad times make strong men.
        Strong men make good times.
        Good times make weak men.
        Weak men make bad times.
        Bad times make strong men.

        1. Plinker762

          We need to introduce wolves to the urban areas to give them something to really worry about.

          1. Derpetologist

            I saw article where the idea was to control the deer population by re-introducing wolves.That was the more insane idea. The less insane idea was shooting the deer with birth control hormones.

            Isn’t it interesting that some of the first things we teach children are stories about how dangerous wolves are? Peter and the Wolf. The boy cried wolf. Little Red Riding Hood. The 3 Little Pigs.

            And yet in spite of all that, there are people who are seriously suggesting that wolves be re-introduced into populated areas.

            [anguished Zoidberg groan]

          2. Oh, PEOPLE-populated areas. My bad.

          3. Suthenboy

            We are talking about two different wolves. The dangerous wolf is symbolic. The wolf in parables is symbolic of the nature of the world. Actual flesh and blood wolves are dangerous to livestock but not so much when it comes to people.

            Establishing wolves in human populated areas is not a good idea. They would bring in disease that would spread to pet populations (granted, they would keep the feral cat population down) and no doubt people would start feeding them. They would become semi-tame, dependent on people feeding them and not bother chasing deer (that’s hard work!)

            It wouldn’t work and just cause more problems.

          4. Sir Digby

            We need to introduce wolves to the urban areas

            ::Subotai laughs gleefully::

    4. I’ve been tempted to write an article about this. The increasing quiet desperation of people these days. Maybe I’ll write it.

    5. Rhywun

      “Kids are dealing with a hell of a lot more than when we were little,”

      If that’s true it’s because their parents are feeding it to them.

      1. Timeloose

        My life was more stressful as a teen than today’s teens, but my father and his were all much tougher than me. My great grandfather laughed that my grandfather got Saturday off every other week and never had to work in the breakers when he was 10.

  40. Gender Traitor

    Am I a bad person for really truly hating with a white-hot passion the “We ready for y’all” commercials?

    ‘Cause I can live with that.

    1. MikeS

      I (thankfully) have no idea what you are talking about, but since I despise the normalization of the destruction of the English language, I hate it with you. I assume, at least, Ted S. also does.

      1. Gender Traitor

        Commercial (for NFL? Nike? Don’t know. Don’t care.) featuring athletes – mainly young athletes, it seems – singing “We ready (3x) for y’all” to the tune of “Nah nah nah nah, hey, hey-ey, goodbye.” (What’s the actual title of that song and who recorded it? I should know, but its use as a stadium chant has obscured its musical origins in my memory.)

          1. Gender Traitor

            Thanks! Now I can sleep tonight…unless I have that tune running through my head.

      2. I prefer to listen to games on the radio, so no, I didn’t see that commercial either.

  41. Drake

    The Patriots look like a well-oiled machine. I’m a Patsbgan and this game is boring.

    1. dbleagle

      This new idea of don’t play your QB’s has turned week 1 into crap. From both QB’s on Thursday to Big Ben in the current blowout it has made week 1 effectively a pre-season game. I’d be pissed if I had paid NFL tix price for seats to watch this live.

  42. Derpetologist

    Say what you about Putin- the guy knows how to look cool:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tPqOc4lOYuk

    1. straffinrun

      Props the the cameraman. I would’ve tripped walking backwards and spilled down the stairs.

  43. Derpetologist

    I don’t like to quote Tucker Carlson, but this is gold:

    ***
    As George Orwell once noted, “the worst advertisement for Socialism is its adherents.” According to Orwell, the typical socialist is, quote, “either a youthful snob-Bolshevik or, more typically, a prim little man with a white-collar job, usually a secret teetotaler, and often with vegetarian leanings.” Orwell wrote those words in 1937, but they’re entirely recognizable today. Especially the line about vegetarianism. There’s something about the left that makes them highly neurotic about food. That’s been true for generations. There’s evidence the impulse is getting worse. Here’s a clip from the other night on CNN. Democratic candidates lining up to denounce meat as immoral:
    ***

    Hello, Nathan J Robinson, are you listening?

    1. dbleagle

      I am currently prepping moose loin for cooking in a great simple French recipe. No socialist in this corner of ‘Murica.

      1. Sir Digby

        I am currently prepping moose loin

        Is this because it bit your sister?

        1. Gustave Lytton

          Oh, Rocky!

          1. Gustave Lytton

            Dammit. I screwed that up.

          2. dbleagle

            You will be sacked.

          3. Sir Digby

            Gustave, you’ve earned way too much good will to let that little snafu be anything more than a road bump.

    2. Akira

      Here’s a clip from the other night on CNN. Democratic candidates lining up to denounce meat as immoral:

      Remember a while back when there was a kerfuffle about the Democrats wanting to eliminate meat consumption, and they rolled out this narrative that “nobody wants to take your hamburgers away”?

    3. Suthenboy

      He left something out. The root of all of those symptoms is that socialism appeals to people who cant compete.

    1. Chafed

      I’ll take 1 and 3 (and be in my bunk.)

    2. Spudalicious

      I’ll take two.

  44. hayeksplosives

    Plunged int the world of Netflix “The Spy”

    Might not see y’all again

    1. Sir Digby

      ::has a sad::

    1. Gender Traitor

      Well, if you want them to make your sammich correctly…

    2. Sir Digby

      QFT:

      jukk0u1 pt12s
      Upvote! I got my peepee spanked by the mods for a similar comment. Some folks need to spray some WD40 on their sphincters and loosen up.

      1. Lachowsky

        A couple days ago I got censored by imgur by posting an innocent picture of a woman in her natural enviroment.

        Barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen. Some people have no sense of humor.

        1. straffinrun

          At least give her some flip flops.

        2. Most people don’t have a sense of humor.

          Or my humor subroutines are miscalibrated.

  45. straffinrun

    How y’all can hate Twitter is beyond me.

    https://mobile.twitter.com/CurtisLeMay6/status/1170857433318621186

    1. Derpetologist

      Hm. Curtis LeMay. He had a buddy named Thomas Power. That guy was the inspiration for Col Jack DeRipper in Dr Strangelove.

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thomas_S._Power

      ***
      Power was the architect of the Operation Chrome Dome airborne alert program of SAC that ensured that a proportion of the nuclear-armed strategic bombers were always aloft so as to survive a first strike.[4]

      When RAND proposed a counterforce strategy, which would require SAC to restrain itself from striking Soviet cities at the beginning of a war, Power countered with:

      Restraint? Why are you so concerned with saving their lives? The whole idea is to kill the bastards. At the end of the war if there are two Americans and one Russian left alive, we win![5]

      Professor William Kaufmann from the RAND Corporation, losing his patience, noted: “Well, you’d better make sure that they’re a man and a woman.” At that point, Power stalked out of the room. The briefing was over.[6] Having been briefed by another famous member of the RAND Corporation, Herman Kahn, on the genetic effects of nuclear weapons, Power replied: “You know, it’s not yet been proved to me that two heads aren’t better than one.”[7]
      ***

      That was when men were men, women were women, and small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri were *really* small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri.

      1. Lachowsky

        Curtis lemay paraphrased-

        “If we dont win this war, we will all be tried for war crimes.”

        1. Derpetologist

          +1 bomb them as long as there are 2 bricks stuck together

          +1 bomb them into the stone age

          He had some ideas about how to handle the Vietnam War.

          Make that rubble bounce.

      2. Lachowsky

        Also.

        The atomic bomb had nothing to do with the end of the war at all.” –Maj. Gen. Curtis LeMay.

          1. dbleagle

            In anticipation of the impending invasions of the Japanese home islands 100,000’s of Purple Hearts were made. Enough of them were made that I was presenting them to my wounded in 2003 and 2004.

            Fussel was correct.

          2. hayeksplosives

            That’s amazing.

            Not sure if happy or sad.

          3. hayeksplosives

            War is hell.

    2. Rhywun

      LOL that is Twitter in a nutshell.

    3. Gustave Lytton

      Oh my!

  46. Spudalicious

    Just watched Shannon Bream interview Neal Gorsuch. Whether you agree with every decision he’s made,or not, he’s one solid dude.

    1. straffinrun

      Meh, he’s no Garland.

      1. Sir Digby

        To be fair, neither was Liza.

        /Teh Patriarky strikez agen

  47. Derpetologist

    I like this song:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=so2s-NZVXZA

    I know someday my time will be up. I want to make sure there is no unfinished business.

    1. straffinrun

      Catchy tune. Gotta say that I didn’t know it was possible to employ more cliches than Hall and Oates.

  48. Sir Digby

    https://hotair.com/headlines/archives/2019/09/the-politics-of-procreation/

    This section caught my attention:

    Secularism, with its tendency towards identity politics and hyper-individualism,

    Lolwut?! There’s such a thing as being too much of an individual?

    “No man is an island; but some are peninsulas.”
    — Robin Williams (The Survivors)

    1. straffinrun

      Sounds like he’s talking about individualism as opposed to being part of a family. He’s got a point in that being the unabomber is an unhealthy expression of individualism. Only gods or beasts can live alone.

      1. Sir Digby

        Yes, a conflation of ideas. But, just because Kazinsky lived alone doesn’t mean he wasn’t engaging in identity politics. He might have felt mostly alone in his stridency, being a recluse. But, he was definitely playing an “Us vs Them” game.

        1. straffinrun

          He certainly wasn’t a Rothbardian individualist. His manifesto kind of sounds like Tucker’s ideas on economics.

          1. Sir Digby

            Heh

          2. straffinrun

            Buy Murican!

          3. Sir Digby

            Fuck yeah!

        1. straffinrun

          Defending the unabomber? I’d read that submission.

    2. Rhywun

      tendency towards identity politics and hyper-individualism

      That doesn’t even make sense.

      1. Rhywun

        Unless you’re “broken” in some way, as straff hints above.

    3. hayeksplosives

      I can’t square identify politics and individualism.

      Aren’t they opposite?

      Or am I missing NuSpeak definition of individualism?

      1. Sir Digby

        Yes, it does smack of NuSpeak.

  49. Derpetologist

    Similar to the “good times, weak men” quote from above:

    Through action, a Man becomes a Hero

    Through death, a Hero becomes a Legend

    Through time, a Legend becomes a Myth

    And by learning from the Myth, a Man takes action

    1. hayeksplosives

      Tee hee.

    2. Gustave Lytton

      That was fast.

    3. Gustave Lytton

      Get your shower with Jennifer Anniston at 30Kft while you can.

  50. Does anybody else think that the new Skinny Jillette sucks?

    1. Sir Digby

      Did he take a page from Drew Carey?

      1. I guess so. Not as funny, dropping his principles for watered down cosmotarian pseudo-Leftism, increasingly hostile to other viewpoints.

        He should never have had a family.

        1. Sir Digby

          He should never have had a family.

          Life was fine without government force. Until you have children. Then, bring on the coercion!

        2. Sir Digby

          Where is saying the leftish stuff”

          1. He’s jumping on the global warming stuff. Ironic considering there was a whole episode of Bullshit devoted to enviro-hysteria.

          2. Plinker762

            How can you doubt when 9 out of 10 government sponsored scientists agree?

          3. Sir Digby

            Either I’m stealing that, or, you need to start cranking out (!) merch with that on it.

          4. Sir Digby

            Damn.

            Well, to play the advocate here, is it possible he thinks it has been “proven” more than when he made Bullshit? IOW, has he made any claim that he’s re-thought the issue and come to a different conclusion?

            I know–even if he did, doesn’t make it so.

          5. Plinker762

            Perhaps, but nothing has changed. The models still aren’t accurate and the predictions aren’t coming true.

  51. Derpetologist

    Last post for tonight:

    monster trucks dressed up like dogs

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1v2UWDyog_s

    Scooby dooby doo…where are you? Gotta catch that villain…

    1. Sir Digby

      Derpy, I nominate you for the new Most Interesting Man in the World campaign.

      ::salute::

      1. Derpetologist

        I said it was my last post, but I gotta say this: you know that guy from the Dos Equis most interesting man in the world commercials?

        Yeah, he was a red shirt on Star Trek…and lived.

        Sharks have a week dedicated to him.

        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jonathan_Goldsmith

        1. Gustave Lytton

          On March 9, 2016, Dos Equis announced that it would replace Goldsmith in the role as the “Most Interesting Man in the World”, saying that the brand hoped to “reboot (the character) in a way that’s relevant for today’s drinker so the brand doesn’t get stale.”

          The term reboot, outside of electronics, needs to die.

        2. Sir Digby

          The character was inspired by his deceased sailing partner and friend Fernando Lamas.

          Damn. “Week dedicated to him”, indeed.

          1. Gustave Lytton

            Renegade’s dad.

            The voice of the commercials, starred in the medieval swashbuckler Crossbow with one half of Chad & Jeremy as his dogged opponent. None of which I knew or cared about at the time.

            And Audrey Griswold!

            https://youtu.be/QraZKip8l_A

        3. he was a red shirt on Star Trek…and lived

          The redshirt fatality rate is an interesting example of statistical bias.

          When someone went through all of the on-screen appearances by non-main characters, their shirt color, and fatality rate, the red shirts actually had the lowest percentage of fatalities. They were merely the most numerous because there were more extras in red than any other color.

    2. Plinker762

      I saw this first at SEMA. The suspension on the Trophy Trucks are pretty amazing.

      Sasquatch Hunter

  52. Gustave Lytton

    https://youtu.be/E8PD8AyHK9Q

    Seats look a little more empty, but it’s early in the day and the basho. No rain delay for these boys.

    1. Gustave Lytton

      And Aminishiki is doing commentary! 22 years as a sumo. Amazing.

      1. Gustave Lytton

        Or as a rikishi, rather.

        1. Rikishi don’t lose that number.

  53. Lachowsky

    http://imgur.com/F5JwwOk

    Typical Glib behavior

    1. l0b0t

      What is that? It looks expensive.

    2. Lachowsky

      Hydraulic cylinder.

    1. Gender Traitor

      Well…I guess it’s refreshing to see a world-class athlete come onto the scene and show that she doesn’t seem to have an ego as big as all outdoors.