Motel Living, The Second

Read episode 1

 

After a very pleasant week of quiet and recovery we got the call, Denver, CO! Four weeks of lighting and troubleshooting at the Chase building in Downtown, Yikes! They also requested my trouble/son to go, so we reset and off we go….. 

 

Flagstaff was uneventful, probably because it was one night only. I stopped to get a few Tall Cans at the gas station, looked in, saw black cans with the AB logo and said, “Cobra” then I checked in to find I bought Natty Ice, Blaaaaggh! It still worked. We left Flagstaff at nine AM, and the son and wife blaze ahead in Kia Korean Kar, while Bella and I mosey in the OMWC van, do, do, do…..

All of a sudden I hear brrrrr, BANG! The left rear let go at 70 mph, but the core held long enough to get off the I-40, in Nowhere, 35 miles west of Gallup NM. I have a spare, then I went looking for a jack, no. I call for very expensive towing into Gallup, and spend 3 hours waiting for the Indians who run Firestone service center to change one tire! Back in Cali, it’s 20 minutes at the local llanteria, stereotypes gonna be stereotypes I guess, I lost 5 hours, and the crew was in ABQ waiting for gas money, so, off we go. 

Castle Rock, CO.

 We landed at Super 8 after a 16 hour tour, a 16 hour tour……….. and they were sold out, even though I have a guaranteed reservation with my card, part of the bargain you see. After some haggling, we crashed in a single til the morning, and here we are, in our double, POS room. 

 

Until then, I had not considered when we were going to be in CO, then it hit me, Independence Day, and a glorious light show courtesy of God daily, what’s not to love. 

 

The drive into Denver is no worse than L.A., and back is a breeze at 4 AM. I also traded out my OMWC van for the best thing of all, a Kia Sedona minivan! 

 

It fits all my stuff and I have room to spare. Where we are staying, we have an indoor gun range, 2 breweries, 2 liquor stores, Jack in the Box, Mc D’s and a laundromat, don’t forget the smoke shop, all within ¼ mile of our pad, oh yeah, Waffle House and Village Idiot for foodie stuff, convenient to be sure….

After settling in, Yusef goes straight outside to wait for rain, and here it comes, lightning, hail and floods of yummy moisture from the sky. I love it. Every day, the same thing, work, walk the dog, beer and Glibs, until…

 Hey, Baby, it’s the Fourth of July….

The wife loves sparklers, and being broke, and in a motel I thought I best stick with a few hundred of them and not buy any blowy-uppy things, I knew I wouldn’t need them anyway, not here. There is a definite Motel Culture, a few people decided to BBQ, then others brought meats and chips and….. I brought the Sparklers.

What started as a few ended up with half the motel enjoying Independence Day together, as Americans, sharing and still living well despite our living conditions, and handing out Sparklers to the kids is mine and the wife’s great joys in life, FIRE!!!

 

 

Start ’em young! This has been a highlight of our trip to far, change is afoot however, but we shall leave that til next time, 

Cheers!

The Gallery, and the Beer Gallery, after the first week, heh.

Comments

331 responses to “Motel Living, The Second”

  1. Florida Man

    There is a definite Motel Culture,-

    So what are some interesting stories from the fellow motel dwellers?

    1. Yusef drives a Kia

      I’m writing them down, that’s a whole other article in itself, Maybe a teaser tonight, Watch the Skies!

      1. Florida Man

        Will do

  2. Count Potato

    This is hillarious

    https://twitter.com/kiarace24/status/1150836552710467584

    “I AM AN UNDOCUMENTED IMMIGRANT”

    LOL

    1. Yusef drives a Kia

      I AM NOT A NUMBER! I AM A FREE….meh. ….

    2. Heroic Mulatto

      THE SOONER ICE IS ABOLISHED THE SOONER SHE IS FORCED TO DO PORN!

      1. Yusef drives a Kia

        Who doesn’t like a tall glass of say, lemonade with ICE? why take my ICE away?

      2. Count Potato

        What about ICE bondage porn? She could handcuff the Sandynistas to that chain-link link fence and bang them with a strap-on.

        1. Heroic Mulatto

          I think that is a thing already.

          1. Chipwooder

            Indeed it is.

    3. Playa Manhattan

      I’m hiding contraband in my butt

      1. Spudalicious

        Don’t shoot yourself in the nuts. It’ll fall out.

        1. straffinrun

          Link?

      2. Count Potato

        Weird flex, but OK.

  3. blackjack

    Here’s a little song, it’s on my roadtrip playlist.

    1. Yusef drives a Kia

      Gary Richrath, nice guitar player, good band, a bit smarmy later, why they died probably,
      Riding the Storm out,

      1. blackjack

        Yeah, Back on the Road again was the only song written or sung by the base player Bruce Hall. Never had anyone name that tune just listening to it.

        1. blackjack

          I mean, no one’s ever guessed it was REO Speedwagon, just by hearing it.

        2. AlmightyJB

          Great tune. Saw them do it live back in early 80’s.

  4. Yusef drives a Kia

    And since I brought up Lemonade stands, what’s with all the undocumented stands? I was joking but now I’m not. the local Julio’s get their cart full of fruitas and blow away little Suzie on the opposite corner, I say kill em all with the AIDS or something,
    /Don’t try this at home, Humor only

  5. Fourscore

    Yusef with 2 Kias now. How long have you been on the road now? How much longer?

    I used to do that but only to a single location at a time, stay 5-6 weeks and back to home base and only once or twice a year. Lots of short out of town trips in between but back home on the week ends. I sort of liked it, not bothered by corporate. OTOH, corporate wasn’t bothered by me either so it was reciprocal.

    I feel for you though, a person needs a home base, where the beer is already cold. Good luck in the days to come.

    1. Yusef drives a Kia

      I came to the Glibs with 2 Kias, then charity sold my old Blue one, then Yippee! a 2007 minivan, measured and set up for the wife’s power chair, plenty of room,

      1. Brett L

        Those things will bark the tires. My buddy used to joke his Kia minivan was more likely to spin the tires than his Dodge Ram. Good little ride.

    2. Yusef drives a Kia

      Can I come live with you? My name is Bob the Builder for a reason…

  6. AlmightyJB

    Nice beer selection! Sounds like another cool adventure:)

    1. Yusef drives a Kia

      Been having fun on payday weekend to be sure,

  7. Playa Manhattan

    Don’t talk shit about Minivans!!!!!

    Oh…. I thought someone said something

    1. AlmightyJB

      I would have loved a mini van back when I lived out if my ’77 Gran Prix with leaky T-Tops:) Although chicks did love that two-tone Prix. It’s all relative.

    2. Scruffy Nerfherder

      My wife talks shit about them all the time. Too bad I bought her one.

    3. Pope Jimbo

      Minivans? I think you meant to say Swagger Wagons.

    4. There’s nothing mini about the man inside a minivan

  8. MikeS

    Looks like you’re making the best out of an unpleasant situation. Thanks for taking us on your adventures!

  9. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Thanks Yusef. I appreciate your positive outlook on things. It reminds me to try not to be too aggravated and enjoy life more.

    1. Yusef drives a Kia

      I miss my stuff, I have my Ukelele and a tablet, the PC died, thank Gom for backups

    1. AlmightyJB

      Pretty creative really

      1. Count Potato

        I see nothing wrong with it.

  10. MikeS

    Should be a libertarian national holiday:

    This Wednesday marks the day to go the wrong way and be proud (and maybe a little defiant about it). Wednesday, July 17, is Wrong Way Corrigan Day.

    Pilot Douglas Corrigan earned the nickname Wrong Way Corrigan in 1938 when he told authorities he would be flying from Brooklyn, N.Y., to Long Beach, Calif. However, onlookers were puzzled when Corrigan’s plane, which took off to the west, made a 180-degree turn into the clouds. Twenty-eight hours later, Corrigan landed in Dublin, Ireland, stepped out of his plane and said, “Just got in from New York. Where am I?”

    He claimed he got turned around because of a navigational error, and said heavy cloud cover obscured landmarks and low light caused him to misread his compass.

    However, not many people were buying it — and not just because of the visible smirk on his face when he spoke of the trip. He didn’t appear to be someone who would make such a silly mistake. He was a skilled mechanic who had helped build Charles Lindbergh’s “Spirit of St. Louis” and he had just modified his own plane to handle a transatlantic flight.

    In 1935, he applied to fly from New York to Dublin with that plane, but the Bureau of Air Commerce rejected his application to make the flight because they deemed his plane “unsound for a non-stop transatlantic trip.” The organization did authorize it for the shorter cross-country trek from New York to California.

    1. Yusef drives a Kia

      This is why I never let someone drive me anywhere, Y’all don’t no North from South…….

    2. blackjack

      something, something, forgiveness not permission.

      1. Yusef drives a Kia

        Almost always, the correct approach, something something

  11. Say “hey” to the wife for me, and give some ear scritches to Bella!

    1. Yusef drives a Kia

      Belly says arf! Wendy is back in the hospital with her last foot, messed up bad, but in Cali where her Doctors are, so that’s cool.
      You formatted this just how I wanted, Thanks again to you and all the Glibs!

      1. Damn. Give my best to Wendy. At least she’s with the docs who know her situation.

  12. Spudalicious

    Yep. I don’t have the self control for that kind of lifestyle. I need structure. And I’m not even German.

    1. Yusef drives a Kia

      I’m going nuts for that reason alone, I rely on a schedule, and a routine, old and wise you see, and I maximise my fucking off time,
      mmmm fucking off time…..

    2. Count Potato

      Do you know who else was not even German?

      1. Spudalicious

        Mussolini?

  13. straffinrun

    Reminder that My Name is Earl is a top 5 all time sitcom.

    1. Yusef drives a Kia

      Who the Fuck is Earl? is he a Libertarian writer I haven’t heard of?
      Howdy!

        1. blackjack

          This was at my shop.

          1. straffinrun

            Nice.

          2. Count Potato

            Did you get to bang Jaime Pressly?

          3. blackjack

            No, but she was very nice and not put off at all by my flirting.

          4. Count Potato

            Good for you. You miss all the shots you don’t take.

          5. blackjack

            Rather shoot for the moon and miss, than shoot for the gutter and make it, right?

          6. blackjack

            Rather shoot for the moon and miss, than shoot for the gutter and make it, right?

          7. blackjack

            With a double barrel, no less!

          8. Count Potato

            To be honest, I’ve done both.

          9. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            It bears repeating.

    2. blackjack

      They filmed n episode at my motorcyle shop. It’s the one with the OCC buffoons in it. Paid me well and they were pretty cool about everything.

      1. blackjack

        I still have an official script, somwhere.

    3. Spudalicious

      A damned good sitcom, but that may be debatable.

      1. straffinrun

        Granted, it’s no Three’s Company.

        1. Spudalicious

          It pains me to admit that I actually watched that. But I have an excuse, there were only four channels.

          1. blackjack

            Come and knock on my door…

          2. straffinrun

            Knock and Come on my door.

          3. Spudalicious

            Mr. Furley, is that you?

          4. egould310

            Chrissy’s nipples. Janet’s ass.

          5. Rhywun

            You shut your whore mouth. Three’s Company is a goddamn classic.

          6. straffinrun

            I was NOT being sarcastic.

          7. straffinrun

            Oops. Thread fail.

          8. Rhywun

            ??

  14. mikey

    Hey Foursquare. You likely know this already, but here’s Ron Bailey at TOS on the Beepocalypse.

    https://reason.com/2019/07/15/no-bee-apocalypse-thanks-to-free-markets/

    1. commodious spittoon

      I had a very attractive young woman come by the house collecting donations to save the bees. I told her I’d be making a donation later when I buy loads of vegetables at the store*.

      *I didn’t. I meekly took a pamphlet and pretended to take the beepocalypse seriously.

      1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

        *I didn’t. I meekly took a pamphlet and pretended to take the beepocalypse seriously.

        ::GASP!::

        cs didn’t make that comment?? What is this world coming to?

        /probably becoming a place where prepositions can end a sentence…

        1. commodious spittoon

          Yeah, I’m a big confrontation-averse pussy.

          It probably won’t surprise you to know that I duck out of the way to avoid passing people in corridors. I’ll abruptly change course to avoid having to briefly acknowledge people.

          1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Yeah, I kinda fig-Hey! Where you going, cs?

          2. CPRM

            I’ll stare them in the eye and pretend they aren’t there.

    2. Fourscore

      Thanks, Mikey. I’ve been saying this for years by anecdotally tracking the price of the bee packages every year. Every year the price would increase a little, about the same as inflation but rounded up a little. Supply and demand, etc. As Bailey pointed out its very easy to increase the supply, as long as there is a demand for more bees.

      Had there been a real shortage the price of honey would have shot up as well. Just another BS scare , this time by ‘scientists’ that should know better. The market works with bees like any other product.

    3. Count Potato

      “Pornhub’s Beesexual Campaign Buzzes With Beerotica To Help Save The Bees”

      https://www.forbes.com/sites/curtissilver/2019/04/16/pornhub-beesexual/#4ee863b46dc7

  15. mindyourbusiness

    Glad you made it OK, despite the tire hangup. I didn’t think there were Village Inns anymore. And yeah, that’s what I used to call ’em.

    1. Yusef drives a Kia

      Damnit, now I’m hungry….

    2. MikeS

      I was wondering if that’s what he meant. I liked and now miss our Village Inn.

      1. Fourscore

        A Village Inn very near here, only its a restaurant/bar

  16. LJW

    uh oh here we go again

    Italian waterboarding?

    1. Spudalicious

      Make it a deep dish and it violates the Geneva Conventions.

      1. LJW

        Sweet mother of God don’t give anyone any ideas.

      2. Make sure that pineapple ring is on an uncircumcised penis.

      3. AlmightyJB

        I’ll be in Chicago tomorrow ordering thin crust pizza.

    1. More proof that the NFA needs to be thrown out.

    2. AlmightyJB

      Sweet:)

    3. Gustave Lytton

      I’d like to see some reviews first.

    4. Spudalicious

      That makes my wrist ache just looking at it.

        1. Spudalicious

          Yeah, I’m out.

    5. Tejicano

      Not only is this non-NFA – you don’t have to purchase through an FFL (in most states). Just order it to your house.

      If you end up in a dangerous social encounter where a firearm is required, and you do draw first, I would suppose your opponent would not even try to pull out a Glock or a S&W. This would pretty much just end the argument unfired.

  17. commodious spittoon

    You came through Albuquerque and didn’t hit up any of the natives?

    1. Count Potato

      Buzzfeed is a hive of garbage humans.

  18. Lachowsky

    Yusef, good luck with you travels. Change is hard and uncertain. You will do well.

    1. blackjack

      Yes, folding money is much softer.

      1. And stays in the order you sort it to.

    1. AlmightyJB

      Wow.

    2. topnotchtoledo

      Well I can’t argue, I communist rigged my fence gate when it broke.

      1. commodious spittoon

        Commie stole my bike!

        1. blackjack

          Commie PLEASE!

          1. Rhywun

            You win, THIS TIME.

          2. Winston

            Where’s Madcat?

        2. Rhywun

          Commie, please.

      2. Yusef drives a Kia

        so you broke your fence, blamed it on Kulaks, and made you orphans clean up, sounds about right…

    3. Lachowsky

      Know how to starve a commie to death?

      Hide his food stamps under his work boots.

    4. Lachowsky

      What are three things you cant give a commie?

      A fat lip
      A black eye
      A job

    5. Lachowsky

      What’s the difference between a commie and a bag of shit?

      The bag.

    6. Lachowsky

      What’s green and sits on my front porch?

      It’s my commie and I’ll paint him whatever color I want to.

    7. Lachowsky

      How come there aren’t any commies on Star Trek?

      They don’t work in the future, either.

      1. Akira

        I think it’s funny that Roddenberry put tons of pro-socialist messaging in there, but the corollary that many people take away from it is “socialism will work when we invent replicators that can copy almost any piece of matter at a near-zero cost”.

        1. straffinrun

          And even then I wouldn’t bet on it working.

        2. Winston

          They evolved past the need for possessions.

          Funny that this sort of propaganda is okay today but New Trek propaganda is terrible. And make no mistake there was a definite contemporary political agenda in TNG..

          1. Spudalicious

            When you can make something with a replicator, why work for it? And yet, there were still rich people. Hmmmm.

          2. Rhywun

            I always assumed the cool tech was restricted to the military. The plebes did not have access to replicators.

          3. Gustave Lytton

            And social agenda. It was ham handed in its preaching.

    8. Lachowsky

      What do commie kids get for Christmas?

      Your bike.

      1. straffinrun

        Helicopter rides.

        1. Spudalicious

          That went dark quickly.

          1. straffinrun

            I just report the news.

    9. Sir Digby (PBUH)

      Everybody: please remove your lawn proletariat(s) from your yards.

      Whatever you do, resist the urge to attend a hammer & sickle burning–it won’t go over well in the local press, and, we need all the good optics we can obtain.

      /“I’ll have those Bolsheviks voting Democratic for the next 200 years.”

      1. Spudalicious

        I don’t understand. Does this mean I can’t mow my own lawn?

        1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

          Depends on how you identify, “comrade”.

  19. Count Potato
    1. Chafed

      I’m not sure that’s breaking news.

      1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

        well, when you’re oblivious…

  20. Count Potato
  21. Gustave Lytton

    Nice write up Yusef! Setting the mood on my end by eating dinner in a hotel room. Now if I only had a tall can…

    1. Yusef drives a Kia

      Voodoo Ranger Imperial PA whoo hoo!

      1. Tonio

        ^Nice

  22. Count Potato

    “Demonstrators holding signs that read “Abolish ICE” and “Close the Camps” have blocked 5th Avenue in Midtown Manhattan. Traffic at a standstill.”

    https://twitter.com/donie/status/1150879833058160643

    1. Rhywun

      Take that, alt-right cabbies!

      1. Count Potato

        Those nazi Indians and their swastikas.

        1. Tejicano

          Hey, an Aryan is an Aryan. Doesn’t matter what they do for a living.

    2. Spudalicious

      “Ironically, it looks like they’ve erected some sort of barrier, or wall.”

      Larf.

      1. Tejicano

        I wonder who they made pay for it?

    3. Winston

      These commies are about as “pro-open borders” as Stalin.

      1. commodious spittoon

        Ironically their preferred policies would result in many fewer migrants rushing over the border. Of course, by then the guns are all pointed into the country.

  23. Tonio

    Yusef, I’m finally catching up on your motel living series.

    Where we are staying, we have an indoor gun range, 2 breweries, 2 liquor stores… don’t forget the smoke shop

    IOW, perfect for a Glibs meetup…

    1. blackjack

      It’s an ATF convenience store.

  24. straffinrun

    Linked already? For reasons, this won’t be considered a gaffe.

    https://mobile.twitter.com/thehill/status/1150888279358746625

    1. commodious spittoon

      What about this gem?

      “I am not a kook.”

  25. R C Dean

    Mad respect, Yusef. Your guts and good cheer in adversity is something to behold.

    *doffs top hat*

  26. hayeksplosives

    Testing 1-2-3.

    Have I been unpersoned? I made 2 comments that I saw on bu then they disappeared

    1. hayeksplosives

      Duh. I posted it to the wrong open browser window.

      I still exist!

    2. Spudalicious

      *whistles*

      Hey! Hayek got a post through. Something went wrong.

    3. Pope Jimbo

      Reading you 5×5 HE

      Hope things are going well out there in the boonies. You missed a classic Minnesoda thunderstorm today. Sunny and hot at 4pm. By 5 it was storming with tornado warnings everywhere. 8pm was back to sunny.

      You know you miss that sort of weather.

      1. hayeksplosives

        Yeah, I kinda do miss thunderstorms.

        We had some spectacular ones over winter here, but everyone says that’s very rare.

        Now I only get the crazy weather on work trips.

  27. hayeksplosives

    I love a good road trip story

    1. Winston

      https://humanevents.com/2019/06/22/the-long-march-of-individualism-comes-to-a-juddering-halt/?utm_referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com%2F

      A Hansard Society survey showed that British people, amidst the Brexit impasse, pine for a strong leader who can act decisively in the best interest of the country. Facing an uncertain future, unity may become more important than individual liberty.

      The pendulum won’t necessarily swing from liberal globalism to authoritarian nationalism, but like a ship in stormy seas, socially advanced but angst-ridden Western societies will seek a safe harbor.

      For all its faults, collectivist order may be preferred to individualist chaos.

      The social divide exposed by Brexit was conceptualized by David Goodhart’s “Somewheres” and “Anywheres.” The former type of person is rooted in community, with a strong sense of belonging at several levels from family to country. “Anywheres” express the progressive values that are educationally, professionally and economically rewarded; they think of themselves as “on the right side of history.”

      The third force for collectivism is the insecurity of the hyper-connected younger generations. Online social media is a tremendous asset for communication, but research shows correlation with mental health problems in adolescents

      With reluctance rather than relish, fractured liberal societies will turn to strong leaders. Voters may abhor the boorish style of Trump, but they will seek reassuringly decisive politicians who will protect them from internal conflict and the challenges of globalization. In psychologist Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, the higher existential pursuit of self-fulfillment is irrelevant if basic needs are threatened. Safety, both physical and psychological, comes first.

      1. Gustave Lytton

        liberalauthoritarian globalism to authoritarian nationalism

      2. R C Dean

        “socially advanced”

        That’s an odd way to say “infested with Marxists”.

      3. Winston

        Oops that wasn’t meant as a reply.

        Yes it is interesting that our “liberal elites” might defend “liberalism” in the abstract but loathe it in practice. when they aren’t defending it they are bemoaning income equality, white privilege, global warming, toxic masculinity, consumerism, etc…

  28. hayeksplosives

    Well two of my direct reports at work nearly snuffed it last Thursday at Dugway. I saw the still pics at that time but saw the video today.

    Sheesh. I didn’t sleep well this weekend and after seeing the vid, tonight’s not going to be better.

    The two of them both suffered hearing damage but are otherwise ok.

    I am a nervous wreck, but maintaining a stiff upper lip.

    I saw one of them today and he told me he was sorry, which struck me as strange because he executed the procedure correctly but I am now eliminating said procedure. I spontaneously gave him a hug and he said “Does this mean I still have a job?”

    Poor dude.

    1. Spudalicious

      The hazards of command. You’ll get through it together. And you obviously have developed a good crew.

      1. hayeksplosives

        Thanks. Glad they all made it back more or less intact.

    2. commodious spittoon

      “Does this mean I still have a job?”

      “Good night, [employee]. Good work. Sleep well. I’ll most likely kill you in the morning.”

      1. hayeksplosives

        Lol. Pretty much, yeah.

        Not waiting for an actual body count before I make changes.

    3. Sir Digby (PBUH)

      Oh, wow–video. That which is seen can’t be un-seen.

      And, the poor guys. Did they say if they had improved any over the weekend?

      /Sorry you had to experience that.

      1. hayeksplosives

        They had their hearing checked today. Not great but the doc wants them to come back next week. He expects a full restoration.

        1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

          Whew! I hope it all goes well for them. What a “DAY-UM!” situation.

          1. hayeksplosives

            Yeah it put the fear of God into the hearts of all involved and of those who deal with similar tech.

          2. commodious spittoon

            How do I get into that line of work? Can I do like an army reserve stint? I’m boring and my life is boring and I need to jump-start my CV so I have fun stories to tell people, rather than stories like how dad mistook a beer bottle for a prairie dog.

          3. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            rather than stories like how dad mistook a beer bottle for a prairie dog.

            But…I like the prairie dog story!

          4. Spudalicious

            And this is how you Glib.

          5. hayeksplosives

            Careful what you wish for there, Sparky.

          6. commodious spittoon

            I wish to wow the panties off ladies.

            *screws up eyes, crosses fingers extra hard*

    4. Lachowsky

      Yikes. Work accidents suck. On Thursday, a buddy of mine got whacked pretty good.

      We had an accident using the jib hoist above the 58’. The drum keep rolling up after the up button was released. The block hit the drum and caused the cable to slip out of the swaged lock. That caused the block to fall, Seth was placing a bolt in the North Aux. Brake Assembly. It hit him on the left side of the neck. He is banged up right now, with a cracked shoulder blade and a crack in a vertebra.

      1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

        Geez, Lach–you be careful, too. Sorry to hear about your co-worker. Speedy recovery wishes for him.

      2. hayeksplosives

        Scary with the spinal injury especially. Hope that doesn’t keep haunting him

      3. slumbrew

        Oof, that sounds painful, though other than the last bit, that largely sounded like something from Patriot.

        (I sort of want to memorize that scene).

        1. hayeksplosives

          This is my favorite along those lines

          https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=RXJKdh1KZ0w&t=7s

          1. slumbrew

            I’ve seen that before. It’s spectacular.

          2. hayeksplosives

            It is a lovely film. There’s an old black and white original with the same words but different props.

            Nerd humor.

          3. dbleagle

            That is funny.

            Good to hear that your crew has nothing more than a story to tell others someday.

          4. hayeksplosives

            Thanks, Double. Been a tough week

        2. CPRM

          He works for Dick Jones!

          1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            We all will. Eventually.

  29. Gustave Lytton

    Ok, went out for a walk and a tall can. Even if it is crappy Constellations fake beer.

    https://imgur.com/a/19mVHh7

    1. straffinrun

      What’s with the color schemes on these cans of beer you guys post? Hired the uniform designer from the USFL?

      1. Gustave Lytton

        Crappy lighting maybe?

        In better light
        https://www.walmart.com/ip/Pacifico-12pk-12oz-Cans/882351491

        1. straffinrun

          Oh, it’s Pacifico. Not bad at all. It’s not your lighting. It’s my eyes.

          1. Gustave Lytton

            I was gonna say, not much difference than the 天皇 of beer

            https://imgur.com/a/DQh7euX

          2. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            So, are these Duff brand beers?

          3. straffinrun

            Welcome Spring Premium Malts. Wish we could get rid of this rainy season. Lasting forever this year.

          4. Gustave Lytton

            It’s been very mild here this year as well. Had a very early heat wave, then normal, then stuck in cooler. Rained again this morning. I think the wife didn’t turn the heat on today.

          5. Tejicano

            You’ll regret writing that in a couple weeks when the oven kicks up the temps. I have a bad premonition that this summer is going to make up for all the cool temps we’ve been having so far.

          6. straffinrun

            ^This is true. Got a baaaad feeling about this, man.

          7. Tejicano

            Or for another fitting movie reference – “I’m getting too old for this shit.”

    2. commodious spittoon

      Dad takes the dog out for a walk up on g-ma’s property a couple weeks ago. Puts his beer down at the top of the drive, walks the dog down to the bottom, maybe a quarter mile. On his way back up he spots what seems to be some sort of vermin standing at attention up the lane, watching him and the dog approach. The whole walk back up the drive he and the dog are creeping along as he tries to figure out what this little critter—prairie dog? Wild ferret?—is doing.

      It’s his beer bottle in silhouette against the twilit sky.

      1. hayeksplosives

        Must have been some good stuff 🙂

      2. The Bearded Hobbit

        I love a happy ending.

        1. hayeksplosives

          Are we not doing phrasing anymore?

        2. commodious spittoon

          Definitely a happy ending. Land was plagued with f’ing prairie dogs for years.

          1. Tejicano

            The plague probably took them. One infected flea is all it takes to wipe out a colony.

          2. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Sorta like Alien/Aliens, only smaller. And fewer advanced weapons.

  30. CPRM

    The motel I stayed at in Bakersfield, the phone rang and I picked up thinking it might be the front desk. In a husky male voice I hear, “Do you want me to suck your dick?” I hung up and faced the door all night. Fucking Bakersfield.

    1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

      Wait….so they offer that without a request? Maybe they’re just ahead of the curve, as it were.

      “Fucking Bakersfield”, indeed!

    2. Rhywun

      LOL hotels are the best.

      1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

        Do you think that particular place qualifies as a “hotel”?

        We both worked hospitality in our careers, so I know it happens. But, it sounds more like “motor inn” shenanigans.

        Also, no pistol-whipping for writing “shenanigans”.

        1. CPRM

          it was a motel, as per the article title. The kind of motel with cracked pink plaster walls and a window in the dirty bathroom.

          1. Rhywun

            Dude(s), I’ve worked enough Hotels to know there ain’t no difference between a Hotel and a Motel other than parking arrangements.

          2. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Well, and $$.

          3. CPRM

            Bah wit da ba bang adang ditty ditty up jump the..Kiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiid Rock!

        2. Tejicano

          One fine evening waiting in line to check in to a motel in ABQ. At the front of the line is a guy who obviously rode in on the hog parked out front. He’s trying to straighten out his reservation which the lady at the desk has no record of. Right behind him is a woman who anybody would assume was not unaccustomed to the phrase “$20 – same as downtown” with her “chaperone”. After the conversation at the desk dragged on a bit too long Ms. $20 tells the biker – “Look asshole, she’s trying to be polite – but she doesn’t have any fucking room for you”.

          I sure was glad I was properly armed for that establishment.

    3. straffinrun

      So, what was your answer?

      1. CPRM

        I hung up. I was in the mood for a rimjob that night.

        1. straffinrun

          You get those at Howard Johnson’s.

          1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Just ask for the “Orange Roof Special”.

            I mean, that’s what I’ve read online.

        2. commodious spittoon

          Yak.

          No offense.

          You never go ass to mouth.

        3. hayeksplosives

          I got a prank sex call in college once. Heavy breathing, I said “alright who the hell is this?”

          I didn’t recognize his voice when he said “Do you want to talk dirty and touch yourself?” So I answered “That is very kind, but I’m not in the mood just now, so no thank you.”

          I think he was surprised I gave a polite decline and he sounded a little startled when he said “OK. Have a nice evening.”

          Lol

          1. commodious spittoon

            “Thanks a lot, it’s not sexy if you’re not offended.”

          2. hayeksplosives

            Pretty much yeah. Silly bastard.

            If he’d shown up at my room handsome and engorged, I might have let him in.

          3. CPRM

            What about not offensively ugly and engorged?

          4. straffinrun

            Would you accept loathsome and semi flaccid? The years have taken their toll.

          5. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            handsome and engorged

            That, right there, is for the business card.

          6. straffinrun

            Dating profile advice for Tulip?

          7. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Dating profile advice for Tulip?

            Huh….I think you may have found a solution, straff.

          8. hayeksplosives

            “What about not offensively ugly and engorged?”

            Well then I have to get to know the guy and if he’s witty and intelligent it could be a win.

            But if it’s casual, he’s got to be handsome.

          9. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Well then I have to get to know the guy and if he’s witty and intelligent it could be a win.
            But if it’s casual, he’s got to be handsome.

            Damn…

          10. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            My 80-something grandmother got a rude call when I was there. She didn’t recognize the voice when the guy asked her how she was. When she responded and asked him how he was (grandmothers…), He said, “Oh, just jacking off.”

            That’s when I heard my sweet Okla/Tex grandmother use the phrase “jaking off”…. Some things, you just can’t even.

            /Yes–she hung up in a very shocked state.

      2. Sir Digby (PBUH)

        Straff, you’re not a reporter, are you?

        Straight to the ‘facts’ with this one.

  31. Sir Digby (PBUH)

    All of a sudden I hear brrrrr, BANG!

    Oh, my God….Any time I see/hear this in a story, I get a knot in my stomach.

    Yusef, you are a mighty man. I’m glad you are persevering, and are able to tell us about it.

    1. straffinrun

      Yusef has that survivor vibe going on.

      1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

        He damn well does!

        /Three cheers for survivors!

  32. straffinrun

    Fake Saudi passport, diamonds and piles of cash. Screw Epstein’s safe. What’s in McAffe’s?

    1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

      What’s in your his wallet?

      /tread carefully–you may not be so curious about his safe

      1. CPRM

        “I said wallet, not where you nut.”

        1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

          But, the COINS, man!

          1. straffinrun

            As a kid in the 70’s, I’d keep my coins in my tube socks.

          2. commodious spittoon

            For beating the fat kid when he got you lunch detention?

          3. That’s an odd euphemism

          4. straffinrun

            Ha. Last day of my senior year in high school I got called to the principal’s office. “It looks like you owe us 50 hours of detention. Alright, sit in the chair outside my office for an hour and we’ll call it even.” Cool principal.

          5. hayeksplosives

            Hell, last day of school? He wanted to go home as bad as everyone else

          6. straffinrun

            That and the detentions were for skipping school and going to Twins games. He was a fan himself.

          7. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Shoulda used that tube sock of coinage on him. Run like hell, and you’re home that much quicker.

          8. Gustave Lytton

            Can’t do that. It’ll go on your permanent record.

  33. Winston

    https://theweek.com/articles/852090/liberals-astonishingly-radical-shift-gender

    The comparatively slight fudging of the grammatical rules that Manjoo proposes for American English would be utterly impossible in these other languages, used by many hundreds of millions, without tearing them apart from top to bottom. Looks like Anglo-American culture stands at the forefront of human freedom after all.

    But what is this freedom that Manjoo and so many others suddenly crave for themselves and their children? That’s more than a little mysterious. Slaves everywhere presumably know that they are unfree, even if they accept the legitimacy of the system and the master that keeps them enslaved. But what is this bondage we couldn’t even begin to perceive in 2009 that in under a decade has become a burden so onerous that it produces a demand for the overturning of well-settled rules and assumptions, some of which (“the gender binary”) go all the way back to the earliest origins of human civilization?

    The beginnings of an answer can be found in the writings of a number of thinkers who have analyzed, often critically but from a range of religious and political perspectives, the potential excesses of liberalism and democracy — and especially the antinomian logic of individualism. Alexis de Tocqueville, Robert Nisbet, Christopher Lasch, Walker Percy, Michel Houellebecq, and others have reflected deeply on what might be called the phenomenology of individualism — how a society devoted at the level of principle to the liberation of the individual from constraints can easily produce citizens who continually feel themselves to be newly enslaved and in need of ever new and more radical forms of liberation.

    That’s because all societies — as collectivities of individuals sharing a common culture as well as common laws, rules, and norms (including linguistic rules and norms) — invariably constrain individuals more than they would be if they lived in absolute isolation from others. Any one of those limits on the individual will can feel as if it’s an intolerable constraint, and the principle of individual freedom can always be invoked in order to combat it.

    1. Rhywun

      “utterly impossible in these other languages, used by many hundreds of millions, without tearing them apart from top to bottom”

      That’s the point. Tearing shit up.

    2. straffinrun

      Blockquote the first paragraph and we can decide if we want to click on the link.

      1. Winston

        That would require that we RTFA though 😛

        Also I wanted to include his critique of non-binary pronouns and the bit about individualism.

        1. straffinrun

          Did I ever tell ya that this here wall-o-text represents a symbol of my individuality, and my belief in personal freedom?

          1. Winston

            May I subscribe to your newsletter?

          2. Gustave Lytton

            It’s in English but the letters run top-bottom, right to left. And the newsletter is bound on right side.

          3. CPRM

            .aixelsyd uoy evah

          4. commodious spittoon

            but the letters run top-bottom

            You never go top to bottom.

          5. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Check out cs over here….all with the sexual advice!

            You need to write a column for us: Got Grammar, Got Game

          6. commodious spittoon

            I’ve just got a huge crush on Rosario Dawson.

          7. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            huge crush on Rosario Dawson

            It’s the nurse thing from all the Netflix Marvel shows, isn’t it?

          8. CPRM

            Word up to Commodius.

          9. Chafed

            Hey everyone, CS is Cory Booker.

  34. Winston

    https://m.theepochtimes.com/postmodernism-how-nihilism-consumed-the-left_2662540.html

    We live in an era of pessimism and nihilism, when hope and purpose have been stripped from existence. From Marcel DuChamp’s sculpture “Fountain,” to the anarchistic rage of the movie “Fight Club,” what remains is an ugly husk of self-hatred that consumes society from within.

    While it can be difficult to explain this destructive phenomenon, one word sums it up: postmodernism.

    1. CPRM

      anarchistic rage of the movie “Fight Club,”

      Once again, Tyler was the villain.

      1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

        Some people have trouble with that.

      2. Rhywun

        God, I hope so.

  35. egould310

    New album from Holy Tunics. Jangly guitars, power pop, with tinges of 80’s new wave/???

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C1CW4no5e-8&list=OLAK5uy_ltz677MMeCpr8PDrd8rO-WduzJ27fuQO8

    1. CPRM

      I kind of dig the style, but having the vocals behind the music is distracting.

    2. Rhywun

      Nice! That guy has a mouth on him, though.

      1. commodious spittoon

        But is he ass to? Because you never do that. It’s not allowed.

      2. egould310

        Yeah. More f-bombs than I was expecting. Their other albums were not as sweary.

        1. Rhywun

          I much like. Will check out further.

  36. egould310

    New album from Proto Idiot, out of Manchester? UK. Punky garage rock with shades of Buzzcocks/Wire, lo-fi aesthetics and a general fuckit attitude.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vMbiBQUiIaw&list=OLAK5uy_mbFKEh1I2r8AaNhIfjIQEnL_13KLezECc

  37. KSuellington

    I did a job today for a Russian guy born in 1970. He mentioned that he left at 16 with his family. He said they took everything from them but their suitcases and called them traitors and told them never to return. His take was that “all the good Russians left then or when they could. Maybe 5-10% of those that did not are decent. The rest are fucked. That’s why they voted for Putin. Anyone that really wanted freedom got out of there. Those that didn’t want it stayed. I can’t believe that here in America many people now seem to want that type of system.” Preach it brother.

    1. CPRM

      Talking with my super proggy since I’ve known her sister-in-law this weekend, she said she hates the fed gov (now that she works for DNR). She’s still uneducated about being ‘One Of Us’, but I see this as a start. So maybe somethings can change some times.

      1. KSuellington

        Baby steps.

        What is the DNR, Department of Natural Resources?

        1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

          I was hoping for “Denatured Nudist Resort”, myself. I guess yours makes more sense, though.

        2. CPRM

          Department of Natural Resources?

          Yes.

          1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Damn…

          2. KSuellington

            I like yours better.

            Dept. of Nothing Really

          3. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Yours is probably far more accurate to the situation, unfortunately.

    2. Tejicano

      That’s an interesting take from somebody who lived it.

      In 1993 a buddy and I helped a Russian woman drive her van – which she had purchased in Japan – up from Slovakia to her home in St. Petersburg (long story behind this). For the 2 1/2 days it took to get there we rarely left the vehicle – sleeping in it when we weren’t moving other wise it would be stolen.

      When we got to St. Petersburg she had arranged a place to park it which was heavily guarded behind tall, steel walls. Speaking with her mother (through her as the translator) she said that Russians believed freedom means freedom to do crime.

      1. CPRM

        Russians believed freedom means freedom to do crime.

        Huh, sounds like the reactions from both parties when we talk about freedom.

        1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

          Well, when people have freedom, they may make the wrong choices. Gotta protect everyone from that.

      2. KSuellington

        Nice story, I’d like to hear the rest. I can only imagine how fucked up Russia would have been in 1993.

        1. dbleagle

          When the movie “The Death of Stalin” came out I went to see it in the theater. The crowd reaction was interesting. The people with more laps around the Sun thought it was funny and the younger set were silent and confused. However there was one old woman who was clearly pissed off.

          After the movie ended the woman approached me. In a still distinct Russian accent she said she was very angry because they “played the death of that monster” for humor. I agreed he was a monster but he would hate to think that he was being mocked.

          1. hayeksplosives

            “Satan hates to be mocked”

            CS Lewis

  38. Yusef drives a Kia

    Good night Glibs, more to come, Love you all,
    even /Ted S

    1. straffinrun

      Night, Yusef. Thanks for the write up.

    2. Gustave Lytton

      Good night to you and Bella. Tomorrow’s another day to kickass and take names.

    3. KSuellington

      Thanks for the tale Yusef. Hope your motel living doesn’t last too long.

    4. Sir Digby (PBUH)

      ‘Night, Yusef!

    5. egould310

      G’night. Sleep tight.

  39. CPRM

    Got a documentary on The Munsters cued up for whenever I fell like dropping off of here. That’s the kind of sick fuck I am, even when I’m drifting off into a drunken stooper my brain wants to be learning new stuff while I’m passing out.

    1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

      Can I be Fred Gwynne?? Yvonne was a looker…

      Also, Dragula

      But, hang out for a while, dude.

      1. CPRM

        Rob Zombie, before he was famous. Well known, but amusing.

      2. CPRM

        Well, it’s been like 20 mins, so you made me bored. I sleep now. BY SLEEP MEAN WATCH EDUCATIONAL CONTENT UNTIL I ACTUALLY FALL ASLEEP (not as memeable as STEVE SMITH)

        1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

          20 minutes to make you bored? I got police shit to handle, man!

          1. Chafed

            CS is Cory Booker and SD is a cop. It’s a night of revelations.

          2. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            SD is a cop

            I make no written or verbal claims to officer-hood (heh)…

            /ix-nay on the op-cay alk-tay!

          3. Chafed

            Ok but CS isn’t denying anything. Ergo, Cory Booker is a secret Glibertarian.

          4. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Well, maybe he’s just ‘busy’, IYKWIMAITYD.

      3. Chafed

        A sense of style, great grooves, and you can play it loud. I really enjoy him.

        1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

          Same here. Also, hello, Chafed.

          /good taste, man

  40. Sir Digby (PBUH)

    Late-nite YT vids:

    For all you night owls that maybe aren’t too jaded yet, check out Arcade Matt:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zsk80vj-AnM

    Seems like a genuinely nice guy–makes a living playing arcade games of skill and then uploading the videos, seems to have a pretty big fan base (yeah, mostly kids)…his stuff is “family friendly”, so, probably not a glib.

    1. Chafed

      In this day and age I continue to be amazed at the many ways people manage to make a living. I had no idea this existed.

      1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

        Like I said, they guy seems nice. Kids are always around where he is, and he’s pretty gracious about the fan club.

        But, yeah–A little jelly that I didn’t think of that a long time ago. There are other arcade/games of skill channels, and none seem to be as personable.

        I would link to the one couple that who you would, based solely on the wife’s voice, think was a case of child bride syndrome. Her voice will break your metal-tuned ears.

  41. DenverJ

    You were 30 minutes from my place. Why you no email?

    1. Chafed

      How would anyone know where you live? It’s not like it’s in your na-. Oh wait. Nevermind.

    2. Sir Digby (PBUH)

      “New phone computer. Who dis?”

      I think you missed him by…what, a half-hour? Hour?

      But, if you’re wanting an email, fine…make with the address!

  42. Sir Digby (PBUH)

    Does Grizzzly know about this?
    https://www.instagram.com/p/Bz2EwFGAeSo/

    Also, did I spell “Grizzzly” correctly?

    1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

      What inspired that post:
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=__UytIDkuX0

      /Wait for it…

  43. SP

    Ok, I’m sorry, but I have a quick update to make to the site. There only seem to be a couple of you around, so….stand by!

    Will just be a couple minutes. (I hope…..)

    1. SP

      Whew. The site is still here.

      I now return you to your regularly scheduled late night lonely hearts club meeting.

      1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

        Thank ya, ma’am.
        ::dips imaginary cowboy hat::

        1. SP

          Have a peaceful shift, SD.

          1. Sir Digby (PBUH)

            Will do!

      2. The site’s not here, it’s been replaced with a perfect replica. The original is off in some eccentric’s collection

  44. Sir Digby (PBUH)

    Where’d our Nippon-based glibs run off to? The Monday night slough-off can be brutal, but, you lot are usually about.

    Also, paging Pie.

  45. l0b0t

    Morning all. I finished work a wee bit early (5:30a) and was able to hit the bagel store right as they opened up. Freshly baked bagels are very, very tasty. Thanks for the window into your life Yusef. Please accept my (I’m an atheist, so saying prayers sounds off) hopes/wishes/love/good thoughts for your Wendy.

    1. hayeksplosives

      I second those emotions but will throw in a prayer because God has pulled my fat out of the fryer more than once.

  46. hayeksplosives

    As predicted, no sleeping

    FML

  47. Akira

    I was reading the Wiki article on the Victims of Communism memorial and came across this particularly stupid quote:

    According to Professor Shi Yinhong of the Center of American Studies at the People’s University of China, the monument was inappropriate: “In the history of socialist countries such as China and the Soviet Union, there were many dramatic events. In the capitalist countries, many bad things have also happened, but we do not erect monuments to the victims of capitalism.

    Gee, maybe because there isn’t really anything attributable to free enterprise that racks up death tolls in the millions??

  48. Sean

    Morning peeps

    1. MikeS

      Yo

    2. You really shouldn’t eat peeps this early, even if you microwave them first.

  49. DEG

    Late to the party.

    Yusef, I like these stories and that you’re hanging in there. Best wishes to your wife for her foot.

    Hayeksplosives and Lachowsky, I’m sorry to hear about the work accidents and I hope your coworkers heal up sokn.