Imagine if instead of using “micro”, they had gone with another synonym when coming up with “micro-aggression”: Measly-aggression. Lilliputian-aggression. Pygmy-aggression. Any of those would clearly expose the self-detonating nature contained in the concept. Those synonyms also don’t lend the air of scientific terror that “micro-aggression” enjoys. “Micro” evokes similar terms like “micro-organism” which is a potentially lethal creature because of its diminuitive stature. Micro-aggressions are on par with serving E-coli burgers at a Jack-In-The-Box drive through.
Psychologist Derald Wing Sue describes micro-aggressions as, “brief, everyday exchanges that send denigrating messages to certain individuals because of their group membership.” You’ll notice that intent is not part of the equation and that is by design as it renders the perpetrator incapable of mounting a defense. When dealing with E-coli, Mens rea is no excuse for diarrhea. As long as the words or behavior appear on a list cultured in a petri dish at some university sociology department, you’re guilty.
Self-righteous and zealous social movements take kernels of truth and surround them with shit so thick it’s impossible to pluck them out. Assuming a Mexican woman at the hotel is a maid, telling someone they are a credit to their race or asking a black person if you can touch their hair certainly could be deemed offensive. However, they would be offensive only if there is no context which would change the dynamics. If the Mexican lady is wearing an orange apron and emptying a trash can in the lobby, you could be forgiven for believing she isn’t an astronaut. “How dare you assume I work here! Micro-aggression!” she shouts. The problem with MA aren’t that assholes are nonexistent, but rather that the entire concept guarantees you’ll be an asshole in return.
In Meditations, Marcus Aurelius writes, “You have power over your own mind – not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.” If there were an AA for MA addicts, the opening prayer would go, “God grant me the serenity to not mistake an offhand comment for HIV.” For any recovering MA addicts out there, I`d like to offer another way of looking at the world: Micro-respect. MR shifts a person’s perspective from finger wagging to chin stroking. The respect comes from waiting for a person to express themselves thoroughly before you jump down their throats like streptococcus.
MR uses the earlier definition of MA with a little tweaking. MR, according to me, are, “Brief, everyday exchanges that send humanizing messages to certain individuals regardless of their group membership.” I can’t go a week without a Japanese person asking me, “Where are you from?” I suppose I could try to get all 120 million Japanese to never, ever ask me that question again. めんどくさい。Rather than pissing blood and assuming that the question is the product of a grave historical injustice, how about I just answer the question and see what happens? In fact, it was the first question the hot young number that became my wife asked me.
Human interactions are messy and festering with opportunities to assign malice to even the most benign questions, comments or behaviors. Sure, MR may allow some comments that are truly bigoted to slip by unchallenged. But, unlike with MR, MA will slap blame on many people that don’t have it coming. There aren’t many cultures that devolved into murderous killing sprees because ten year old boys played “Smear the Queer”. History is replete, however, with many cultures that destroyed themselves by playing “Spear the Unbeliever”.
Links
Derald Wing Sue on MA: https://world-trust.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/7-Racial-Microagressions-in-Everyday-Life.pdf
Examples of microaggressions: www.sph.umn.edu/site/docs/hewg/microaggressions.pdf
Comments
299 responses to “Weeping Sores”
I like steelmanning as opposed to a strawman arguement
I read it straff, great job!
CafePress Hacked, 23M Accounts Compromised. Is Yours One Of Them?
Hey all if you bought Glibs schwag there is a good chance you are one of the compromised accounts. Someone in Cambodia attempted to login to my gmail and PlayStation account.
Really?
https://haveibeenpwned.com/ is a good site to check if anything linked to your email has been compromised.
I don’t think it’s very good — of the nine sites it claims I’ve been “pwned” via, seven of them I’ve never visited and have no records of at all.
From the examples of Micro aggressions:
“America is a melting pot.”
“There is only one race, the human race.”
I guess the Race realists are super sensitive then?
WTF?
Seriously, Leon! How could you….with you macro-aggressive erasing of peoples’ lived experiences?!?
/am I doing that shit correctly?
Change your passwords and keep buying schwag to support the site, otherwise they will send STEVE SMITH to your house. Trust me! *waddles away gingerly*
Well, no one with a Eurotrip gif as an avatar can be wrong. Although, I am wondering if your waddle was actually due to a STEVE SMITH visit, and not a trip to Club Vandersexxxx…
STEVE SMITH has been dispatched to… deal with this inconvenience. And by deal mean rape.
Nice article, straff. Thanks for taking the time to write it.
?
Yeah it was really impressive that a gaijin like you would put in the effort!
He’s a credit to his race.
Heh. Many, many times I’ve been told, “You really are becoming Japanese!” when I do something polite or thoughtful. But I have institutional power, so it’s simply a compliment.
Gaijin smash is actually kind of like institutional power, assuming it is a real thing. … Holy crap, if I want my “Get away with stiff for being white” privilege I need to move to Japan?
I might have seen that flick… Maybe, maybe not.
“You really are becoming Japanese!”
Just like the song, it means you look like you’re masturbating.
+1
Only racists could come up with a concept like micro aggressions.
That list is fucking joke. A white person denying being racist is racist. Fuck off.
They mix in just enough actual rudeness (“You are a credit to your race.” – who says that?) in an attempt to bamboozle you into going along with the nutty ones. Pretty sneaky, sis.
“who says that?”
Liberals
I could absolutely see Joe Biden saying that.
To Barack.
On election night.
boom-chika-wow-wow?
I say that to a black friend of mine all the time. He likes to use the phrase “mighty white of you” to me all the time so I think we even out at the end of the day.
Shut up! Racist!
You’re a Nazi!
Am I doing this right?
You’re a Towel!
So yes your correct Sir.
It’s funny how recent DNA research is showing us all our common lineages and tracing us back to our common origin. But talking about us as the human race is now is supposedly “robbing” minority people of their ethic heritage. Who’s fucking privileged again?
Do they have Jack in the Box in Nippon?
Yes, but it’s all pixelated.
Pixels, like pineapple on pizza?
I are way too much jack in the box when I lived in Phoenix.
Doubt it. Just didn’t know of a more recent E. coli breakout.
I think that Tex-Mex-ish place that Playa hates has had some issues serving non-contaminated food?
Anyway, nice write-up Straff. Very good read.
Thx, Mike. It’s a tired topic, so I just wanted to have a little fun with it instead of taking it too seriously. Read Jonathan Haidt’s work on the topic if you want an academic’s take.
Why would I want to do that when I could read yours?
For that you get the secret special link.
I’ll couldn’t understand one word of their singing.
I had to follow along with the subtitles.
My wife is constantly microaggressing me. She keeps telling me that she likes certain pants on me. I’ve tried telling her, “my eyes are up here!” All I get is more microaggression. Why is she such a cishetero-shitlady? I just want to be treated with respect. I want to adopt Straff’s micro respect, but that’s got me 2 kids already.
Well you married her, that’s what I tell my wife when I microaggress her, and frappacinos…
I’m pretty sure that’s the origins of the Spartan Krypetia, actually.
I think that was different version of the game though.
Yes, it was originally “Queers Smear (You)”.
I mean, beards as lingerie is pretty fucked up.
The proper response to “Smear the Queer” is to say “smear him with what?” while seductively unzipping.
If your dog’s name is Bella, and you call her pretty Bella, isn’t that Gay?
Does she have a U-Haul?
23 skidoo!
First name Enola. *Timely*
Really? I don’t think the queer thing was it, more the weakest boy, et tu HM?
Young man, have you ever gotten oiled up and wrestled an older man naked? It’s very mainly and not gay at all.
Whose young? Who’s gay?
Have you ever seen a gladiator movie?
Does this rag smell like chloroform?
Just how much oil do you use? And which type?
Used to be boys grew up on manly tales.
That second link makes me want to throw my laptop out the window.
Also: funny how every single example is basically WYPIPOBAD.
And it’s all totally capricious. Rules made up by the whim of the bully.
I hit you, I get a point, you hit me, I kick your ass, that game?
Plus whatever comes out of your mouth is racist. And nothing should be coming out of your mouth because you just need to shut up and listen. We need to have a conversation, and by conversation, I mean I tell you how horrible white straight men are, and you apologize. For being a white, straight, male.
Touch me and die, prog fuck.
/not intended toward you Sir
Yes, that is proper response. I personally try and stay away from people like that.
DNC platform for 2020.
It’s from American Psychologist.
Never give a compliment to non-whypippo. Play safe.
Maybe to be safe we should treat non whypippo like they are fragile and not quite up to snuff. Maybe like 3/5 of a whypippo? I am sure that will improve race relations.
sarc/off
“separate but equal” sounds ideal, right?
For any recovering MA addicts out there, I`d like to offer another way of looking at the world: Micro-respect. MR shifts a person’s perspective from finger wagging to chin stroking. The respect comes from waiting for a person to express themselves thoroughly before you jump down their throats like streptococcus.
They’ll have to hit rock bottom first.
I never realized that AA had some elements of stoicism in its philosophy. “Rock bottom” is not a good place when govt power is in the balance.
Obligatory
https://youtu.be/zxUy0gqigNw
Thanks. I didn’t wanna have to do that myself.
TY, AJB
This should be an Onion article. These shootings are the fault of everything I don’t like.
http://abc6onyourside.com/news/local/ohio-lawmaker-blames-gay-marriage-video-games-and-obama-for-dayton-tragedy
Jesus Christ! I wonder what her HnR handle is.
John. Nah, that’s just mean.
A libertarian society will turn Evangelical out of necessity.
It looks like the left and the right are trying to out stupid each other. I wonder who will win.
No one. ?
Yeah, everyone loses. Especially people who love liberty.
Same when it turns into helicopter rides and yoroi-dōshis.
Heroic Muumuu Latte.
That’s my favorite Starbucks drink!
Who needs a conspiracy? Why, YOU need a conspiracy! yes you do! Yes you do? Whos a good boy? Who’s a good boy?
You’re a good boy!
*belly skritches*
*Invests in aluminum…err “tin” foil futures*
Who needs a conspiracy theory when real life is so much more ridiculous.
WTF
So, in other words, there were some very subtle signs?
I, uh…..are these mutually exclusive? Like, if he were Antifa AND good with women, then he could be a leftist?
ANTIFA are going to be called ALT-Right now.
“They have always been ALT-Right.”*leftist shifting the Overton Window*
That like labels so much, truth be damned, so let them choke on that.
/kinda hope it happens
I can’t even tell what they’re trying to get at with that one.
If the Democrats can get dead people to vote, surely they can get a few ro murder.
I don’t know if you guys have seen the leaked surveillance camera footage from inside Walmart, but it’s some crazy shit.
Coward wore a mask. Didn’t dare to show his face.
My senses were tingling the minute I noticed that.
Have you been following his career?
Ice JJ Fish has a new video out:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JtZ7qKBcfeY
This man can heal our fractured nation.
@ghettospider?
Well, the ‘alleged’ shooter (see my conspiracy comment above- and Jugsy is supposed to provide me with pic of the ‘alleged real shooter’ who is heavy in the melanin) is dressed in all black tactical gear, supposedly with body armor, but exposed hands and a kevlar helmet with reflective strips on it.
Terrifying!
https://www.vox.com/science-and-health/2019/8/1/20750047/millennials-poll-loneliness
Couldn’t have to do with them being some humorless harpies?
Huh. Have you met many people lately? Loneliness seems pretty attractive to me.
You mean you don’t relish accidentally touching off someone’s tripwire and having him/her/it scream at you like a banshee in public while encouraging passersby to help shame and/or beat you?
Yeah, yeah. real life isn’t like Twitter.
In real life they’ll start whisper campaigns behind your back to turn your friends against you, get you fired, maybe get your loved ones to turn their backs on you.
What a bunch of bastards people are.
I find that creepy no matter what race the person is.
Back when I used hair glue and had spikey hair I did have at least one female ask me that. I let her, she was cute, but I still found it odd and creepy.
It’s like the weirdos who wanted to touch my belly when I was pregnant. NO! EWWW I don’t know you, go away!
“You have power over your own mind – not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.”
Peterson hammers at this point.
Prager U just uploaded a video featuring him.
He didn’t invent it of course but he’s reminding people of its value.
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, …”
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serenity_Prayer
Great dissertation, Straff. I didn’t realize I was such a micro/borderline macro aggressor. If anyone asks me if I played basketball I’ll ask if I look black enough or they think white boys can’t jump. From now on I’ll just smile like Chaucey Gardner and walk away, thus portraying micro respect.
I’m way too lazy to be a MA. It’s much easier to be a Macro Aggressor.
The Founding of Glibertarians.com (Colorized) – 2017
The disturbing bit here is that you had that vine at your fingertips, just waiting for this moment.
If by “disturbing” you mean “fucking awesome,” then yes.
Colorized
You’re not supposed to say that!
Naw. It’s cool. We’re bringing it back, like City Pop.
Not woke enough. Reusable Love or (maybe) Paper Love.
Some of those “microaggression” are wonderfully seductive.
Things that happen to everyone and can be annoying magically become racist if you occupy the correct spot on the social ladder.
So they list “being mistaken for a service worker” as a microaggression. Now, that happens to everyone. Heck, I got mistaken for a worker at Costco by a particularly rude old lady in Boca Raton – and I was wearing a Hugo Boss suit with a Jos. A Bank traveler shirt, french cuffs and Tiffany cuff links, with a beautiful lady on my arm wearing a particularly fetching dress. No chance I looked the part of a warehouse club employee. But there ya go. Musta been because I’m white.
My ex used to get miffed about being selected for the random screening at the airport. She thought it was because she was black… but you could see the little light come on telling them which bag to swipe.
You can spot patterns anywhere if you want to. The microaggression chart is perfect, because it gives anyone with any claim to minority status a daily roadmap to discovering all the ways that they are being oppressed. Literally anyone is going to find themselves being targeted by those items. Ask me for help with math – it is racist because you assume I’m good at math. Don’t ask me for help with math but ask a colleague? Well, that’s racist because you assumed I was bad at math because of my race.
It is the perfect mind trap for people who want to play the victim.
My favorite SJW friend who recently adopted the baby from Africa regaled us with the tale of a microaggression of her own invention. You see, people are racist against her and her adopted baby and they assume that she got knocked up by some black dude. (her words) How they know her relationship status is beyond me, (and no way they don’t know the kid is adopted, the kid is adorable and the mom is a 2 on a good day).
Anyway, her evidence of racism? The guy in front of her at the grocery store didn’t move away from the little check writing counter thing fast enough when his turn was up.
I was impressed. That’s pretty creative.
It must be a miserable existence if you ask me.
Agreed. I can’t imagine the emotional stress everyday life must cause for these people.
Oh who am I kidding, it’s all bullshit used to manipulate their audience. I see it all the time from my daughter. She’s 2.
People assume your 2 year old daughter got knocked up by some black dude?
I didn’t listen to Antoine Dodson
Sadly, who did?
I listen to Antoine all the freakin’ time!
I’m not a black dude. And she told me she was 18.
Months, years, who can keep track.
I have a black kid. When he was younger (like 2-3) I had the cops called on me three times for “kidnapping.” I’m pretty sure it was a macro aggression. Once, they called the cops on me in Burbank, so the burbank cops called Lapd, because I had already left and they ran my plates with an LA address. Cops showed up at my door and insisted on coming in to see him in his crib. Another time, the cops pulled me over and very stressfully demanded proof he way mine. I showed them pics on my phone. Yeah, I was pretty pissed all three times. Of course, I’m an older biker looking (ish) white dude, so there’s that.
Where’s all the black kids at?
Good thing they didn’t find your orphans.
I have two stories to go with that….
I had a friend who matches your description somewhat. He was a big, bearded, redneck football coach. His stepdaughter was black.
So we are hanging out at the park with his daughter. She’s playing on the jungle gym and we are over to one side talking about nothing important. Now, she’s developing very early. She’s got a C cup and is quite pretty. So this young kid notices her and comes over to talk. He’s sporting a couple of gold teeth and some chains and looks to be about 16 or 17.
My friend looks at me and says “Hold on a sec… I gotta handle somethin’” (read that in an appropriately rural Georgia dialect)
He walks over to the boy and just stands next to him. Kinda almost too close. He’s a mountain next to the kid, who is looking at him like “who the hell does this crazy white man think he is?”
“Well…. how you doin?” My buddy asks.
“Fine, sir..”, the kid replies, somewhat suspiciously, clearly wondering what the heck is going on.
“That’s a right purty girl right there, doncha think?”
“Uh, yes sir..”
“Yeah, right purty. But there’s two things you need to know about that girl right there. ….”
“The first is, that young lady is 10 years old….
The second is…..
That’s my daughter…”
To his credit, the kid did not hesitate. He turned on his heel and immediately left the park at a quick walk. Smart kid.
“Heck, I got mistaken for a worker at Costco by a particularly rude old lady in Boca Raton – and I was wearing a Hugo Boss suit with a Jos. A Bank traveler shirt, french cuffs and Tiffany cuff links, with a beautiful lady on my arm wearing a particularly fetching dress.”
No top hat, monocle and an orphan (or two) on a leash?
We had only been dating for a few weeks. We were working up to getting an orphan one day.
Awww! I love a good, old-fashioned, courtship story.
Yeah…
Then we got married and had kids. Oh well, can’t have everything…
It’s OK–I have faith that your kids can grow up to have orphans of their own, someday.
So when my wife demands I take the garbage out she’s micro-aggressing me. She treats me like a service person instead of a partner ’cause of my race or because she thinks only men are required to do the menial things. I’ll return the aggression by not letting her make sammiches for me anymore.
Don’t do that! Sammichs are great!
I always get stopped for random security checks at the airport. I wanted to believe it was because of my sick memes, but then I realized that my memes aren’t sick and also I don’t make memes. Now I think it’s because I always wear a tshirt to the airport with native Americans and it says “turn your guns in- the government will protect you”.
I’m going to design a T shirt that says “Remember Ruby Ridge? Allah does!” for travel.
It’s intersectional
I only have two questions: How much is it, and, give it to me.
I have very warm winter clothes. I do not have attractive winter clothes. These two facts have led me to being mistaken several times as a homeless person. Much to the delight of acquaintances.
The worst was when I was waiting for the bus after work one day and I saw a coworker who owed me a couple bucks for something. He came up to me and gave me a few bills and some onlooker chided him for encouraging my homelessness. “He’s just going to drink it all up” was I think the busy body’s quote. My friend laughed so hard I thought I was going to have to call an ambulance for him. The busy body didn’t even apologize. He was so pissed off at his mistake that he just stormed off.
It was a rough month at work though, because of course my coworker told everyone the story and everyone else thought it was just as funny as he did.
Christ, what an asshole!
I like the kind of asshole that just hands me money.
Haven’t encountered that variety as of yet… But I definitely like that kind.
Perfect comment from a Glib (I don’t remember who): “Micro-aggressions? I am micro-concerned and think we should take micro-action immediately!”
Thinking about it it isn’t unlikely that it was Straffin’
I don’t remember saying that and it sounds too clever to be from me.
Sounds like Gilmore to me. But I’m probably wrong.
I seem to remember Episiarch coming up with something like that at TOS.
Should you be offended by perceived racism, sexism, etc?
1. Is the ______ist trying to take your stuff or physically harm you?
2. Is the ______ist trying to enact laws that deprive you of your right to life liberty or the pursuit of property?
If no then get over yourself. No one is required to like you and you are not required to like them, all you, or they, are required to do is not take peoples stuff, not physically harm people, and respect their inalienable rights.
Telling them they can’t hurt you or take your stuff is, like, literal violence, Hitler.
That ship has sailed. Obama just went on record telling us all that words are more important than violence and everything bad is because we use bad words. Of course, he’s talking about evil republicans. But we probably count too.
CNN had a headliner article about how Trump said white supremacy is bad (remember how they chastised him for not decrying white supremacists as he denounced hate?), but he didn’t take the blame for causing it. Interestingly, they cited polls that show that half of americans think he’s a racist – most of them democrats. They literally note the partisan divide. But fail to understand that maybe they play a role in that perception, and that maybe it is a partisan boogie-man attempt to delegitimize and dehumanize the opposition.
No, the lesson they take from that is that everyone who isn’t a democrat is racist.
MR is the name of the game . Sparing a stranger the reflexive collectivism is the most libertarian thing ever.
So the grocery store down the street has instituted a dedicated checkout register in the liquor department. You must purchase your alcohol there. You will be given a sticker averring that your alcohol has been purchased, but you cannot leave the department without first purchasing your alcohol. And they’ll check out other groceries, to a point. Nothing that has to be weighed. They didn’t think to include a real checkout machine, just the till and a scanner. Not even a belt. You hold your purchases through the line. There’s about ten square inches of counter space to help you juggle your groceries, bottle(s), ID card, and payment.
The poor twenty-something kid was a wreck. He told me he’d been cursed out, had strawberries thrown at him by a drunk he’d declined to sell to, and had multiple runners that day. Great setup y’all got there.
Here in Kansas, they just started allowing grocery stores to sell full strength beer. None of the grocery stores were built around having full strength beer available for sale. Since most of the people working checkout are kids, they have to run and grab an adult whenever someone wants to purchase beer.
Among the many stupid laws we have surrounding alcohol, the “minors can’t sell alcohol” might be among the dumbest.
I get not having a 16 year old kid serving alcohol at the pub. That makes plenty of sense.
But not letting the 19 year old running the checkout scan your 12-pack of Bud Light seems kinda dumb. It isn’t like they are gonna sneak a couple of hits off of one of your beers as you are checking out.
Here they only have to be 18 to sell alcohol, bar or store. Good way to know you’re not hitting on someone too young.
Huh….well, his story checks out.
/I didn’t actually intend that…
Yeah, I remember selling beer all the time when I was a kid cashier in NY. I dunno if there was a minimum age.
I like the Dictionary way it is presented: “Here is what they said, and here is what they really meant”. No wonder they go on about dog whistles.
What they said: “Everyone can succeed in this society, if they work hard enough.”
What they meant: “People of color are lazy and / or incompetent and need to work harder.”
Guys, we only have 1 month left.
well that is certainly not a micro aggression
You won’t be laughing when the weather starts getting cold and your girl starts looking for a source of warmth.
That’s what pumpkin spice is for.
Naw, she’s hibernating. She said I might see her in the spring.
Any woman I have ever shared living space with during the winter has called me “the human furnace”. My wife puts her cold feet on my belly to warm them – doesn’t bother me at all.
How about your mom? What did she do to share your warmth?
MACROAGGRESSION!!
I LITERALLY have seen that video.
AV Idol edition.
https://archive.li/mqaWe/c94958c98ad5a59c5287babf632d07a0d8d07311
NSFW.
https://archive.li/SjtpK/85bc1e4bd5c79c7e43d990f25f86ae3ee26e1a09.jpeg
NSFW.
https://archive.li/Fb48I/e3b943402e203c59989298fb902f20267c38ae1e.jpg
NSFW.
MICRO-AGGRESSOR!!!!!
No Koreans? Just Japanese colonial oppressors!
More better.
NSFW
Uffda.
Now put ’em on the glass
3rd times the charm?
https://fivethirtyeight.com/features/political-confessional-the-man-who-thinks-the-u-s-is-better-off-as-a-bunch-of-separate-countries/
I’m not opposed to a breakup, but i do have to get a bit of an eyeroll at the idea that the South would return to Jim Crow without the protective embrace of the Holy progressives on the coasts.
If they would be worse off then why do they stay there now?
False consciousness.
That worked out so well for India and Pakistan!
worse for the Sikhs.
If I’m not mistaken, all these shooter kids seem like class A pussies. All of them have “impotent” as a middle name. Is there a tie in to this micro aggression BS? I think maybe. Why do they think dying or spending life in prison is going to be better than just living life like a mere mortal? They’ve been taught that the world owes them and has no intention of paying, maybe? They want free this and free that and they’re never going to get it. Every issue they hear about is another example of how they’re getting screwed somehow and the ethereal “they” are bigoted, racist and greedy. Their future is fucked because the system is rigged against them. We are burning up the environment, and capitalism is keeping them down. They are hopeless. Might as well shake it up on the way out. If only they could see what a big assed lie it all is.
Suppossed to be a new post. Oops.
There are times when I think this is the only way forward; then I remember that in the ’20s “Birth of a Nation” was being screened in the WH, in the ’50s the KKK was a significant force in both political parties and in the ’60s, left-wing terrorists were setting off bombs every week. I think we’ll be ok.
Separate countries eh .. 300-odd million separate ones sounds a good number to me.
“micro-aggression” .. fuck me, did we really need another term for being offended?
It’s just victim culture. It’s not that I’m easily offended, it’s that you’re assailing me .. even though you don’t know it, and it’s all in my head.
Toughen up, princess, life don’t owe us nothin.
THIS IS DANGEROUS!!
MASTURBATION!!
The greatest demon on earth.
Please whether you are a man or a woman,stop what you are doing and read this now. Each time you masturbate, you
donate sperm to the demonic kingdom. Masturbation is like having sex in dreams, each time you release, you impregnate a
demon and as a woman, each time you are masturbating, you are having sex with a demon and sometimes get pregnant by a demon.
Have you ever wondered how you see yourself with children or breastfeeding a baby in dreams when physically you
have none? That’s the demon or demons you gave birth to.
Last Friday during the One on One section, a very intelligent man came to me to complain that he had an accident in
2014 and lost his car, he nearly lost his life but God saved him. From 2014 he had been applying to get money from the government an “accident grant” but the money was not given to him. Each time he goes to claim his money he would be told to come today, come tomorrow and this money is over a million yen.
As I was praying for him, God revealed to me that he had donated all his fortune to the demons, he masturbate 4 to 5
times a day.
When I asked him he agreed and asked me to deliver him, I prayed for him and told him that tonight, you will have a dream,
a woman will come to make love to you, catch her and pull out a ring from her, that will be the end of your problems. Yesterday he had a dream, his former classmate came to make love to him, he caught her, pulled out a ring from her finger
and woke up immediately. Today at exactly 3:45 pm, he received an alart, 1.3 million Yens has been paid into
his account by ROAD ACCIDENT FUNDS.
Many of you would have been so rich now but because of masturbation, your wealth, good luck and happiness have been
donated to demons. Distance is not a barrier, I pray for anyone that will press F to pay respects, and that will be
the end of your suffering.
F
Wait…1.3 million Yens is like 26 bucks. Nah, I’ll keep jacking it so I can make more room to hold pee in my balls.
U
R
T
H
E
has this person never heard the saying “a shot in the hand is worth two in the bush”
I’d say I’m responsible for a medium sized town of demons.
Piker!
I’m just trying to figure out what’s the messed-up state of auto insurance where you have an accident, then have to apply for a govt “accident grant” from “ROAD ACCIDENT FUNDS” to get paid out, only to be given the runaround by what sounds like the DMV. No thanks.
^ sounds like one of those masturbation demons ^
C’mon, man, Q’s already shot his links.
Super OT AF:
So I’m having a BBQ/Baby Shower on Labor Day Weekend at my house and invited some of the folks I work with. I gave them invitations privately and they understood that they shouldn’t make a huge deal about it in the office. So anyway, fast forward to this afternoon and one of the managers saw someone’s invitation on their desk and made a public stink about not being invited (despite her going out of town for three weeks around that time) and then started asking publically asking everyone in the finance department if they were invited or not. Luckily no one took offense to it but still it’s one of the most immature and unprofessional things I’ve ever witnessed in a work environment and I fucking worked in food retail. It took all of my strength to not rip her apart in front of everyone and what also angered me was that not only she made the person whose invitation she saw feel terrible, but she tends to try and push my buttons.
I’ve tried to be corgial and not be combative because while she’s not directly over me nor have any influence in my raises or promotion, she is still a manager. But I also have to establish boundaries and can’t allow her to continue shitting on me. I’m planning on talking to her first thing in the morning and telling her point blank that I want to handle this diplomatically without involving HR but if she continues, then I’ll be forced to involve them which is an outcome no one wants.
Does your manager know about this?
My manager is good at his job but he’s one of the most least confrontational people around and she’s good at steam rolling over people.
I don’t know your work environment but an FYI to your boss could give you some backup. She’s not going away.
It’s not off topic, she’s micro-agressing you! Lawsuit! Lawsuit! Lawsuit!
Sometimes I just SMDH at people. Unbelievable.
I was filled with rage but also disbelief that someone could actually think that this was okay to do. I’m not the Lord of Mannersville but fuck even I know better than to pull something like that.
That’s unprofessional and super immature to boot. And in any event, counterproductive if you’re hurt about not being invited. Let me exhibit why I never get invited anywhere by complaining to the entire office about not being invited here.
That said… invitations, bro? Come on. Text them the address and BYOB notice.
I wanted to do that but my wife insisted on invitations…….
I have gone out of my way at work to not be invited to stuff before… though just the “let’s get some drinks” crap with people I’m already tired of after 8 or 9 hours.
I will say that this is the first job that I’ve been at where I like everyone and don’t mind hanging out with them after work.
Well… not quite everyone.
But fair enough.
Hahaha, true.
BBQing a baby seems like a pretty hedonistic party.
I want my babybackbabybackbabybackbabyback…
You both are going straight to Heck.
I just watched an episode of Bar Rescue where John Taffer went to help UNLV hospitality students throw and event, culinary and mixology students. None of the students had any real world experience. I know it’s tough for a lot of college majors getting industry experience while being a student can be tough, but to go through four years of college for that and never actually work as a cook or bartender?
Plenty of grocery store and big box stores out there, too.
Sorry…missed their major. Yeah, that seems stupid.
I’d like to shop at your grocery store if they have bartenders. Seems like an innovation Wisconsin would come up with…*starts drawing up business proposal*
Kroger and some/all of their sub chains have had them for a couple of years now.
https://www.chron.com/entertainment/restaurants-bars/article/Heights-Kroger-opens-Cork-Tap-8352225.php
Marianos in the Chicago area serve wine and beer to shoppers.
Lame.
Why you take your kids shopping. They don’t have to drink it themselves.
As the others have pointed out: https://www.dallasnews.com/business/retail/2018/01/30/market-street-recycles-space-fora-second-store-frisco
I keep tellin’ ya–sell the property and head on down.
/This is the location where I tend to shop. And, I’ve only ever had their coffee.
I, sir, will defend my propertay till my dyin breth, God save the
Unionmy family homestead.https://youtu.be/7CxgMvxvVdo
If her hair were a shade darker, totally my type. Now I just want to watch something with Lucy Lawless.
25th anniversary? F me.
Yeah, sometimes I feel like I’ve time traveled. How the fuck is current year already?
Well, Lucy moved on the getting railed by Crixus, so, the passage of time hasn’t exactly been an issue for her looks.
/Not even gonna try to find that clip.
She looked great on Ash VS Evil Dead.
Why would anyone in Wisconsin need to go to a bar at the grocery store?
they all have bars in their basement.
Ha, that show “rescued” a bar near where I live some years ago, changed the name from what it had been called since before I was born, to some typically-nondescript vanilla name .. not even two years later, the old name was reinstated.
HA! They worked on a bar here in Rockaway Beach as well; I don’t think the bar was failing, it was always packed, but it got flooded and washed away by SUPERDUPERSTORM Sandy so I guess having a TV show pick up the remodeling tab was kinda clever. We went not too long after the show. I was absolutely terrified to be stared at all night by a life-size cardboard photograph of Taffer’s leering mug – no box of chocolates, that one.
First!
30 firsts, gentle jerkwad.
Is it just me, or does Tulsi Gabbard look like Julia-Louis Dreyfus? While I’m horrified at the thought of any Dem getting the Presidency, it’d be hilarious if she were the Veep.
Get Out!
No, Tulsi is cute. Julia-Louis Dreyfus, while not ugly, isn’t even even the same league. Or maybe I’m just racist.
You’re mixed up because JLD is 58 years old now. Back in the day she was more than “not ugly”.
Eh….not exactly.
Yeah, sorry if I take my heterosexual lived experience over her career over yours, but I’d say I got this bro.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HQu_NLRvULM
I don’t see a resemblance
I don’t know what either looks like.
https://www.tmz.com/2019/08/05/r-kelly-charged-sexual-misconduct-teen-minneapolis-minnesota/
18 years to call the cops. And alleged victim is represented by Gloria Allred.
18 years? That’s a long time to wait for wanting someone dead…
I never attended a concert that had an age restriction. If there were I would assume it would be 21+ due to alcohol (even though I attended concerts at places that served alcohol when I was under 21, they just used wristbands, why would an 18+ concert exist?
Once the waterworks start, it’s Grown-up City, man!
+1 Chappelle’s Show
I think I posted it last week, so I refrained.
What office is Mr. Kelly running for? I didn’t know he’s Republican.
He’s running for ‘Rich guy going down in flames over being a pervert, time to cash in if you are a grifter’
I really don’t understand this. What’s the point of being a rich pop icon if not to be a total pervert? Fucking hell, not even Louis CK gets a pass for being a fucking creep? The guy was a comedian. Not even comedians get to be perverts? We’re all just supposed to pretend that’s not a thing, that it never happens? I’m not saying men should be creepy perverts, but we will be, whether or not chicks approve of it. But we’re supposed to pretend it’s not a thing? What the fuck kind of puritanical dystopia is this horse shit future we’re making?
I, for one, am in favor of a puritanical society, but I don’t like how the state is becoming involved and the way false accusations are being handled by pop culture.
Yeah, I never got the Louis CK thing. Wasn’t he totally about consent? He just had a weird kink – he’d ask if he could rub one out in front of women.
Not my personal kink, but if you ask first…
I suppose it gets a little complicated because of the strange work environment – everyone is on the road, there is no office, so no delineation between “work” and “not work”.
But still, to unperson someone because they ask for consensual sex acts? Seems a bit much. I’d think “No” would cover it.
Yeah, that one was confusing. They tried to frame it as sexual harassment because he was a bigwig in the industry, so him doing so was work place harassment, but instead of being women at the same company, it was any woman that wanted to work in comedy ever that they painted as verboten for him to have any sexual conversations with.
Well if the evidence is solid…
…whip it out in open court?
If you can get past the twins/face segment: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OK-YiMAGhtQ
You’ll laugh; you’ll cry; you’ll learn how to possibly wipe your ass with rocks!
Well I got almost no sleep last night… gonna be a long day.
Good morning glibs
*out of jokes*
Hi Pie.
https://youtu.be/FFhSJ1KLd3k
Just use Homer’s patented glasses.
Also, Hi, Pie.
OT: Had some rather disconcerting car problems just now (2006 Honda Accord). When I’d turn the key, it would rumble a little bit as though it were trying to turn over, but it wouldn’t. And all the lights on the console would flicker, and there was a clicking sound (I didn’t leave the headlights or any electronic systems on).
It eventually did start and I was able to drive home. When I pulled into the garage, I turned it off, waited a few seconds, and turned the key again. It turned over with no problem.
Any idea what that might be? A bad alternator? Is replacing an alternator doable for someone who is no car expert but pretty good at taking things apart and remembering where each part is supposed to go?
I was going to say “battery”, but, a quick check says that the clicking sound is typically associated with the starter. AS to what it takes to replace, my only response would be a mechanic.
Sounds like a battery. It’s putting out just enough juice to make the starter solenoid click but not engage, and the lights flicker. Maybe the alternator isn’t charging the battery, or maybe the battery is just worn out. Before you do anything though, you should clean your battery terminals. A bad connection at the battery is surprisingly common, and it shares the same symptoms as a bad battery.
Pijust finished episode 2 of the three part Ken Burns documentary on Prohibition. Learning quits a bit.
One thing I didn’t know was that the passage of the federal income tax enabled passage of Prohibition because until that time, federal budget was funded up to 70% by alcohol tax, so they couldn’t outlaw it.
Also learned, unsurprisingly, that it was Democrats leading the charge.
In related news, Peter Coyote could read the dictionary and make it sound interesting
Also, Mabel Walker Willebrandt was a cunt.
?
::looks into her biography::
Hmmm….that checks out. Carry on with your analysis!
Also, good easy Straff. It made me dig up a book I got when someone sent me to a Diversity and Ubckysion national conference at my previous job, assuming that since I have 2 C chromosomes I must be into that.
One session was “Mucromessaging” and the spesker fave ya all a copy of his book. There are some real gems in there I’ll have to share when not.dead tired. As someone noted above, kernels of truth but embedded in shit
“Good essay “
Ahh, the “nugget” syndrome!
Also:
Heh…
Ok ok, I’m typing with one finger and only one eye open!
Holy smokes–you need
boozesleep!good easy Straff
But, but he doesn’t put out for me!
I’m on ET today but aren’t the morning links usually up by now?
No. Eastern time, the Links are 8am, it’s 7:15 right now.
The links should be up by now though
*Compulsively scratches behind ear and taps on wrist*
https://www.engadget.com/2019/08/06/ring-coaching-police-footage/
Yeah…not good.
“I voluntarily bought and put a bug in my house and now I am upset that the cops have access.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yJxCdh1Ps48
To be fair if I were to commit a crime, I wouldn’t do so on my front lawn.
-1 fireworks party at Leon’s house
But a record of your arrivals and departures is more than they have a right to know.
That is assuming you didn’t also make the mistake of putting cameras inside the house.
Worry not soon it will be mandatory 🙂
STEVE SMITH HAVE NO WEEPING SORES. HIKES ON OTHER HAND WILL.
Where muh links at?!?!?
anarchy!
::flips over keyboard::
Seriously, I’m in a hotel lobby and if I can’t climb I’ll just have to put my phone down and observe my surroundings……
Like a psycho
*glib not climb